This podcast is offered by the San Francisco Zen Center on the web at www.sfcc.org. Our public programs are made possible by donations from people like you. Good evening, everyone. And welcome to Beginner's Mind Temple. My name is Kyoshin Wendy Lewis. And this evening I will be talking in a series, and this will be the second one, on a poem called Xin Xin Ming, Trust in Mind or Faith in Mind. And I'll review the first talk briefly and then move on to more of the poem. So Trust in Mind is a Chan Zen interpretation that's part of a movement called Budo Taoism. And during the 6th century in China, Buddhism went through several periods of persecution.

[01:06]

And the third ancestor, Sung San, and he's the one to whom this poem is attributed, was living at that time. And he spent a lot of time on the run and living deep in the mountains. And he died at the beginning of the 7th century. But the poem that's attributed to him is they actually think that it was written sometime during the 7th or 8th century and then was rewritten a little bit later from a poem called Song of Mind. So it was maybe not a completed poem or somebody found it and decided to clarify it and rework it. So But he's very famous, so they attributed it to him. So Musang begins his introduction. Chan or Zen was born out of what might be described as a nuanced sensibility of the absurdity of the human condition.

[02:17]

And this absurdity is an attitude towards the tendency to view life as a narrative. And that tendency to view our life as a story, as something that unfolds in a sort of forward way, a conventionally forward way, is undermined or re-examined through the Buddhist concept of non-self. So this undercuts the... our reliance on the conventions and the kind of tropes of narrative self-referencing. So the transformational potential of that perspective is the context for the deconstruction of narrative continuity. And that deconstruction is necessary for the cultivation and the mode

[03:24]

and the experience of equanimity. Now this kind of makes sense as you read the poem, so as I'm reading it, it'll be more clear. So the Buddhist teaching of equanimity is the fourth of the four Brahma Viharas, or the four immeasurables. These are loving kindness, compassion, sympathetic joy, and equanimity. And the first three of those are loving kindness, compassion, sympathetic joy, it's very easy to become attached to those and have ideas about them and projections and preferences. So the purpose of equanimity can be seen to sort of wash back on those to bring them to maturity. So it addresses the attachment that we can develop to those sort of aspects.

[04:26]

Bhikkhu Analayo explains, equanimity conveys an awareness of whatever is happening combined with mental balance and the absence of favoring or opposing. So this is addressed all the way through the poem. Either being for or against. But these are very reasonable responses to what happens in our lives, to be for or against, favor or oppose. And so equanimity is an attitude or quality that has to be continuously cultivated. Anelayo says, to be at ease and lack nothing comes about precisely through letting go of wanting to have things one's own way. Not easy. So as I said last week, trust in mind doesn't mention bodhisattvas or Buddha nature or compassion and other terms that we often hear in Buddhist teachings, but it does talk about oneness and emptiness, duality and non-duality, mentions the great way, which is referenced to the Tao, attachment, enlightenment, and suchness.

[05:51]

So trust in mind is very much in line with Amelio's interpretation of equanimity as liberating compassion activity from the expectation of results. He explains, this requires giving up attempts to control the situation and change it for the better. Instead, one allows others to take responsibility for their own actions and attitudes. And again, you know, This is subject to nuance and poignancy and this kind of, you know, how do we maintain our equanimity in the face of the things that happen in the world and have always been happening, upsetting things, things that directly affect us or in some way pull at us or cause us some pain or some... or something like that. But one of the things I was mentioning is I think that one of the ways you can see this is there are therapists and teachers and chaplains who, you know, after they've been doing that work for a while, get kind of quiet, are not as likely to be so directive in their...

[07:18]

way of interacting with the people who come to them or they're less manipulative, don't really have suggestions or advice in a specific way. And I think that that's a kind of maturing of those qualities of loving kindness, compassion, and sympathetic joy. They're tempered in a sense by equanimity. Now, Sheng Yen describes trust in mind as an instruction for meditation. The practice should be pursued for its own sake, but while there should be no other purpose, in the end, the mind of equanimity is realized. And then Mu Song, in his commentary, emphasizes the teaching of the poem to be about how to live one's life. So the instructions that it's giving are actually guidance. and sort of encouragement.

[08:21]

And this is in the direction of becoming a sage, someone who can be in the world in a certain way. And I think these perspectives are not really in opposition because meditation and reflection on our behavior and our relationship with others and ourselves and the world are very much interrelated. So the poem begins, The great way is not difficult for those who have no preferences. When love and hate are both absent, everything becomes clear and undisguised. Make the smallest distinction, however, and heaven and earth are set infinitely apart. If you wish to see the truth, then hold no opinions for or against anything. To set up what you like against what you dislike is the dis-ease of the mind. When the deep meaning of things is not understood, the mind's essential peace is disturbed to no avail.

[09:30]

So if you wish to see the truth, then hold no opinions for or against anything. To set up what you like against what you dislike is the dis-ease of the mind. But how do we develop these likes and dislikes? I mean, that's what I think this is really addressing, is what are they arising from, from our experience, from our conditioning, from our assumptions, our hopes, and our fears. So it's not so much we're trying to, you know, sort of take everything apart and just not feel anything, but to see where those likes and dislikes come from and deconstruct them to, you know... see what they're calling the peace, the essential peace that's in the mind. So our preferences, our desires and our aversions, and our uncertainty about whether we're feeling desire or aversion, so that's greed, hate, and delusion, keep us pulled around by duality so that heaven and earth are set infinitely apart, as it says in the poem.

[10:41]

But we don't have any choice but to be engaged with the world as it is and with the interactivity of absolute and relative reality. The purpose of meditation practice or investigative insight is to perceive the absolute nature of things while immersed in countless encounters with their provisional appearances. It is only through this lens of perception that non-clinging works as a tool for liberation. And so it's this, actually this kind of dialectic or conversation between the relative and the absolute reality that engages us in this creative deconstruction of our assumption of a permanent, abiding self and our alienation or separation from the dynamics of the world in which we live. So that equanimity It's not passivity or static state of view, but it's a kind of ease suffused with vitality.

[11:53]

So that's the summary of the first class, and I wondered if people had questions left over or something that came up. Yes. It's just that I changed my mind about something, and my world has changed. It's not that I did something, or like I engaged with the world the way it was, and then I, I don't know, did some kind of social justice, whatever, and then it changed. It was different. It was like I started thinking it's different about something, but it was different. And on a very basic level, fundamentally. So I was just wondering, if they say that when I'm in church, I'm like, We don't have any choice but to engage with the world. It's not like we would find a state of mind that we might call equanimity where we're not being pulled and responding and acted upon and interacting with.

[13:09]

that's then as it is. So it's always as it is. You know, it's not going away. You know, it's not... Yeah. And now it's like that. And now it's like that. Yes, exactly. Okay. Sorry, I didn't quite understand. I want to ask, speaking about equanimity, is it saying that a question of us being economists... response to the world? Even if over-responding doesn't necessarily look on the outside like it's non-attached. Is it a question of saying, well, I have equanimity with the fact that I'm very attached to chocolate, for example, more protecting animals or whatever it might be? Well, what I think it is is that in equanimity we... recognize that we have these habits, if we're not struggling with sort of towards equanimity, we don't notice that we have our habits, we just keep doing them.

[14:33]

But if we're sort of working towards equanimity, we see how they pull us around. And that becomes our conversation. And, you know, as I said last week, Musang says that for the most part, we prefer not to be in equanimity. It's more dramatic, it's more exciting, it seems more effective, and that sort of thing. So it's a real struggle. And what are the consequences of liking chocolate? Well, some people who we don't know are somewhere picking the chocolate. And I read somewhere where they don't give them sunscreen, so they rub mud and stuff on their bodies. And I sort of thought, should I keep eating chocolate, you know? And they sit on the ground to sort the cocoa pods and those sort of things. So, you know, it's that way where we kind of stretch out our perception of our personal view and say, well, how do my preferences expand out into the world?

[15:46]

And then how do I accommodate that? Would you say that a community is equal to what they are? Let's say that I go from a difficult conversation or situation. I have this feeling, which is going to be normal, and your person has their own feelings, and it needs to accept my feelings. With all the things that come with it. In fact, there's one verse in here that I think goes to your question. When the mind exists undisturbed in the way, nothing in the world can offend. And when a thing can no longer offend, it ceases to exist in the old way.

[16:51]

So there's this sense, you know, when you decide you're not going to keep going, then things kind of shift and they're not the same. They're not in that anymore. Yeah. Yes. I think there was one more question. Yeah. like human beings with animals and dogs looking at their face and really get a response. And it's just a human kind of felling that occurs. With equanimity, it seems as though that's a little more higher cerebral stuff. And it's sort of like when you try to do your progress, that might work.

[17:55]

The feeling state is also this kind of felling feeling of the first people. That kind of thing seems to be sort of arise, kind of separate. You get into a state where you're getting very sort of soft and warm and sweet with it, and also responding to the fact that whatever the situation was would have maybe upset you or you were deluded to or whatever. The Dalai Lama, I remember reading about 10 years ago, the Dalai Lama being in some monastery, he had a choice of chocolate cake and a fruit cake or something. He got given a fruit cake and he really wanted chocolate cake. they'd ask about it. Kind of caused a sort of booze-wrapping in that reference. And I didn't know there. I just sort of thought it was great. But when I feel my femininity growing, or my practice is felt, and if I can see that femininity in my last time period, it seems more like related to

[19:00]

sort of worldly wins kind of stuff, like David Wass, you know, the repute, those kind of ideas culturally that they pulled into, like, I have to be successful. What that means is that it sort of has a drive. And when you can see that starting to occur in your life, and stay open to it, just watch the process, I think, boxed around, between those opposites. That when you draw around the inside, the feeling state of growth sort of opens up. Well, what you're talking about, is actually what I'm going to kind of address next. So we'll see what you think of my way of sort of addressing that. And the commentaries and the poem, what they say. So, you know, at the end of the last class, I kind of hinted at, and the questions that were asked at the end of the last class were moving in the direction of... the concept of emptiness.

[20:00]

So, Musang has described the perspective of emptiness as the integrated perception of the interactivity of relative reality or individual consciousness and absolute reality or the visionary cosmos. So, This is, last week I was saying, you know, there's this linear horizontal way we have of going through our life where we see this thing happening and that thing happening and that thing happening. And then that is at the same time being affected by absolute reality in this vertical way. Always, there's so many things that we're unaware of, like the chocolate, you know. But what about all those other aspects of it? So what emptiness is, it's an antidote to attachment.

[21:07]

And that includes attachment to our perception of ourself and to the teachings and practices of Buddhism and our interpretations of them. So this is, you know, this kind of deconstructive thing that's actually very creative. So as a teaching, and it's this attempt to convey the interactivity of particular points of view in the wide context of myriad points of view with all that we cannot comprehend in our moment to moment experience. So Musang quotes Nagarjuna. The victorious ones have said that emptiness is the relinquishing of all views. For whomever emptiness is a view, that one will accomplish nothing. So this kind of active deconstruction, but it's very creative.

[22:15]

So I thought I would tell you a story about something recent that happened to me that I think might address what Chris was asking about. I often walk, and I was walking one day, and it happened to be very warm, that recent little warm period. And so I wasn't wearing a jacket or the usual things that I'm wearing. And so I felt very relaxed and free, and it just sort of grew into this... pleasure and you know i sort of started to feel this is so pleasant i own it you know this is mine this is my moment this is me feeling so wonderful and it's the circumstances i'm in yes i understand that but wow this is great i'm keeping this you know i want to stay here and um i'm walking along and i had gone a fairly long way and all of a sudden

[23:20]

this bike, bicycle comes flying out in front of me out of a side street, and this guy comes out, and he starts screaming at me and going through all kinds of stuff. And it didn't scare me that much because I see a lot of things on the street, but I was a little bit scared because there wasn't anyone else around, and I wasn't quite sure what he meant by throwing the bike. And usually I... I'm very hesitant to sort of interact with someone who's in that state. But I looked at him, and I listened to what he was saying, and I just kept walking. And I was so scared that he was gonna maybe follow me, so I was sort of frightened. And at the same time, I just had this impression of his despair, you know, Because of what he was saying, which I won't tell you because it was kind of gross, but he was explaining to me something had happened to him.

[24:27]

So I was feeling this combination of irritation that he'd interrupted my wonderful experience and then this kind of grief at his life and my sense of his pain. and my vulnerability and all of these things were happening. And then he didn't follow me. And so I wasn't hurrying, but I was walking along. And then, so I felt myself calming down. My breathing got quieter and everything. And suddenly, you know, I noticed the world was still beautiful. The gardens were still there. The air was still lovely. And I was, you know, feeling well and in this state of well-being. And I was also really grateful that nothing had happened.

[25:29]

And so it was just like this whole, you know, in like a few minutes, really, all that happened. And in some way, I also wondered whether there was something about... my being there and his being able to tell me his story and scream at me like that, that was actually a kind of offering to him. You know, there was an interaction there. Something happened. He didn't hurt me. You know, he said some sort of creepy things, but it was, you know, anyway, it was just this whole sort of thing. So, I thought maybe, you know, there's not, he wouldn't be comfortable speaking to everyone in that way. Maybe there was something, you know, about my looking him in the face and listening to him. But, you know, it's, and so it was all those things combined together actually made it possible for that just to be an experience or an incident or something like that that I thought about and thought, well,

[26:45]

what can I take from that experience, you know, for other experiences on the street? And actually, I felt a little less afraid. I don't understand why that happens. But of course, you know, just yesterday somebody was yelling at me and I was thinking, wow, here we are again, you know. But this person I actually spoke with. So anyway, it's just, what was going on there? All those things came together. It was an ordinary experience. And somehow, it had a transformative quality to it. Now, I can't explain that, and I don't think I need to. But just, you know, how do we live... in the world with all these things happening, because I think we do prefer our safety.

[27:46]

I was thinking, you know, most people, maybe not most people, but a lot of people walk out their front door, get in their car, go somewhere else, and get out of their car. And there's this whole world, you know, well, of course, traffic is not always safe, but there's this enclosure, you know, so you don't have to interact with some of the things that happen on the street. But, In any case, our reasonable wish for our personal safety, I think, can prevent us from associating with people who are, you might say, different from us or in a different reality than we are. And so we tend to primarily associate with people who agree with us, who are like us, who... support us and to have the same sense of what Buddhism is, agree with our reality and so on.

[28:50]

And due to that, we kind of bargain away a certain kind of vitality and variety for the sake of our comfort and the lack of a challenge and maintaining the status quo. So this is what we... when we're kind of want to be safe, want to be, want equanimity to have a particular quality to it that's comfortable, that's recognizable, recognizes us. So, and I think this is so reasonable that it's difficult to notice it. that we are protecting ourselves, that we need this safety, and that that often makes us avoid certain things and not want to be on the street or something like that.

[29:53]

So the poem continues. Things are objects because there is a subject or mind, and the mind is a subject because there are objects. Understand the relativity of these two and the basic reality, the unity of emptiness. In this emptiness, the two are indistinguishable and each contains in itself the whole world. If you do not discriminate between coarse and fine, you will not be tempted to prejudice and opinion. So I'll read that again. This is what I mean by the poem tells you this. Things are objects because there is a subject or mind. And the mind is a subject because there are objects. Understand the relativity of these two and the basic reality, the unity of emptiness.

[30:57]

In this emptiness, the two are indistinguishable and each contains in itself the whole world. If you do not discriminate between coarse and fine, you will not be tempted to prejudice an opinion. So I think that maintaining equanimity is actually a very strenuous effort, and it becomes less of a strain as we exercise and cultivate it, because that's what all these teachings are telling us to do. You have to cultivate this. If we had to be told, You know, if we didn't have to be told, then, you know, it would all be easy. But if we have to be told, it means we have to cultivate it and struggle with it. And it's strenuous. And in an interesting way, it's not particularly rewarding in the ways we usually think of conventional reward.

[32:02]

You know, we usually we're rewarded by taking sides and being with that, you know, everybody who agrees with us and aren't we wonderful and we're going to all do this thing, or making sides, saying, well, this is the true way, you know, and here I'm right and this is great. But Musung comments that the poem's purpose is to bring us back to the basic... Sorry. The poem's purpose... is to bring us back to the basic issue of addiction to preferences and the way in which that addiction hinders equanimity. So... This can sound kind of gloomy, and I don't think the poem is gloomy.

[33:03]

I think... one of the things that we forget is a kind of sense of humor or perspective about the absurdity of things. So, you know, that scene with me on the street and this man, well, you know, in a way it was just like a scary comedy. You know, one person's walking down the street and somebody throws their bike and everything. And all these people are just walking by and nobody knows what's going on. And it's just like this absurdity of things. So I think remembering that there is some sort of vitality there, some humor, some way of seeing it that's not so... protective or frightened. To live in the great way is neither easy nor difficult, but those with limited views are fearful and irresolute.

[34:08]

The faster they hurry, the slower they go. Clinging cannot be limited. Even to be attached to the idea of enlightenment is to go astray. Just let things be in their own way, and there will be neither coming nor going. Obey the nature of things, and you will walk freely and undisturbed. When thought is in bondage, the truth is hidden, for everything is murky and unclear. The burdensome practice of judging brings annoyance and weariness. What benefit can be derived from distinctions and separations? So to live in the great way is neither easy nor difficult, but those with limited views are fearful and irresolute. The faster they hurry, the slower they go. So embedded in this poem and other Buddhist teachings is healing.

[35:14]

You know, healing of our hopes and our fears in the midst of the circumstances in which they arise. It's not a cure, it's not an escape, or a bargain, you know, for our well-being. And I often think of Dogen's sentence in Ganja Koan. Enlightenment does not divide you. So it doesn't take you out of things. It doesn't negate the very circumstances out of which enlightenment arises. Mu Song says, Each transfiguration has the residue of the previous and an insinuation of the next transfiguration. So I'm gonna end with the next section of the poem we're gonna cover. If you wish to move in the one way, do not dislike even the world of senses and ideas.

[36:20]

Indeed, to accept them fully, is identical with true enlightenment. So are there any questions or comments? Yes. I have a practical question. It was very nice to hear that part about sense of humor because when you started reading the first poem about the absurdity, I wanted to ask about sense of humor. And I'm a very dark and blue person. And recently I've been training myself to sort of be, I understand I will not stop being a dark woman person. So I wanted to, I started looking at writers or artists that were kind of very dark woman but also really funny about those dark woman things. And I'm making my list like five. So I thought if you have a reputation and if it's gorgeous, that would be amazing. That I could do something to pay. I don't really care about the form.

[37:21]

like if it's a writer or if it's a musician or a comedian or a dancer. But if you know anybody that it would be good to pay attention to someone who sort of was able to express the absurdity and like the dark, the gloomy humor or humor in the dark or something. Well, I think actually most artists hold that. It's kind of like the sort of creative creativity pulls us apart a lot. And so the only way to pull it back together is this kind of sense of humor or letting go in a certain way. So I think I once was going to write a paper on humor in Virginia Woolf, who everyone thinks of as this very depressive artist, you know, and... committed suicide and blah, blah, blah. But when you read her work, you know, you see these little bright moments where she's like laughing, you know?

[38:26]

And it's, so I think you can find it in there. Someone was really surprised that, oh, what's the name of the book? Anyway, it's Fitzgerald. What's his famous book? Yeah, The Great Gatsby. They were surprised that I found that funny, you know, parts of it very funny. But the part that I found funny was he was describing people on a bus, and it was a really hot day, and they're all sweating, you know, and everything, and somebody does something, like they drop something, and this whole, you know, it's just... Anyway, I was just laughing through the whole thing, and there was another part... Anyway... And they just didn't understand what I could think. But it was funny. It was intentionally funny, I'm sure. So it's all, you know, I think you can find it. And, I mean, there's some intentional funniness that has a little darkness to it, which is like Dickens, you know, he's talking about people in these terrible circumstances, and it's hilarious, you know.

[39:35]

So that's some of the stories, yeah. Any other questions? Yes. What is that moment when preference arises? What is that moment when preference arises? I'm remembering that one part in the poem where at the beginning and let's see if this is... me to express what I'm thinking. It was in here.

[40:47]

Things are objects because there is a subject or mind. Understand the relativity of these two. So what? What was it that was making me think? Well, I'll just make an attempt without the poem to help me. The... Moment of preference is, if I understand correctly, a moment of grasping of the mind making a decision based on history. So it's the conditioned mind responding. Does that make some sense? And so how does that work? And how do you notice it?

[41:47]

I almost said, do you care? It's not bad that we have those moments of preference, but it's the consequence of them. So, am I... answering your question, do you think? Keep that, yeah. Well, preference is both desire and aversion. So your preference doesn't mean, oh, I want this. It also might mean I don't want this. So what that is telling you is that you're responding to your conditioning one way or another.

[42:49]

But that doesn't mean that there aren't like pure moments where you are, you know, when we read the Diamond Sutra and the Buddha says, when the king of Kalinga cut my flesh from every limb, you know, I think, you know, in my preferences, I would not be serene in that moment when I think of myself. But he's taking it all the way to that level. If I had had a thought of ill will at that moment. So I think it cuts all the way down. Sorry to use that. But it goes all the way down there. So that how do we see the very source of our preferences? so that we don't project hate towards someone who's hurting us and love towards someone who we desire. Because, you know, we're just kind of, yeah.

[44:00]

I think, okay, one more question. Well, what I think is interesting about that, particularly in the area of art or creativity, but this is also very much related to meditation and practice, is that you develop kind of skills, right?

[45:05]

And these skills start, they turn or they kind of... So the development of those skills ends up giving you that freedom of no preference, right? So that's what this teaching is about. Well, how do we develop that skill, those skills that allow us those moments of no preference and freedom, a kind of freedom? Yeah. Is that kind? Yeah. Yeah. Yes. You don't want your preferences to just keep snowballing, if that's what I understand. Were you here last week when I told the story?

[46:12]

Well, I told the story about this monk. Anyway, he... He's an old elder monk, and he never gets ruffled, and so the students find this really irritating, and they decide to scare him. And so he's carrying a cup of tea to make an offering, and they run out and scream and holler and yell, and he knows that there's a table around the corner, so he keeps walking, and he puts down the tea, and then he leans against the wall and goes, oh! So yes, you still feel things. You don't lift yourself out of your experience in order to feel equanimity or experience equanimity. And in actual fact, equanimity should be informing your activity. So equanimity informs your activity. tendencies of loving kindness, compassion, and sympathetic joy as much as it does your tendencies towards anger, aversion, you know, disturbance, and all that kind of thing.

[47:26]

Does that make sense? Okay. So I think we have to end, and thank you very much. Thank you for listening to this podcast offered by the San Francisco Zen Center. Our Dharma talks are offered at no cost and this is made possible by the donations we receive. Your financial support helps us to continue to offer the Dharma. For more information, visit sfcc.org and click giving. May we fully enjoy the Dharma.

[47:58]

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