This podcast is offered by the San Francisco Zen Center on the web at www.sfcc.org. Our public programs are made possible by donations from people like you. Hello, everyone. Thank you. Firstly, I would like to thank you for that gracious introduction of the City Center of Viding Out for Psychiatric Women. Thank you also to Tanto, Anathon, and Choku, and especially for Hiro, because he introduced me from here, and for the very nice invitation. And this is an honor to be here. to share the talk with you.

[01:04]

Also, thank you for all of the students in person and online to have your time of Saturday morning and with the talk. The topic of the talk today is the key to happiness. Usually we have the key, but this morning I forgot to bring it. We, the residents at our monastery, each of us have a key to happiness, and we keep it. But I intended to bring it, but I forgot. Sorry. First, I would like to say about happiness is independent on environment and conditions. A woman constantly complains, my life is very sad because my husband is rarely home.

[02:15]

One mother said, my son never listens to me and that makes me very angry. One sister complains, my other Dhamma sisters always complains me, yelled at me, she is really difficult. That makes me so frustrated. And what is the common denominator here? All of the above people have the same attitude. They have inadvertently given their keys of happiness to other people. When we allow others to drive and control our emotions and reactions, we fall into the role of being victimized. When that happens, we tend to complain and blame, resulting in anger.

[03:22]

When we begin to blame others, we deliver a message such as I'm suffering because of you, and you are responsible. Therefore, we place the responsibility of our happiness into the hands of others. In doing so, we have admitted that we can to be our own master and depend on others to arrange and dominate our lives. In the end, no issue can be resolved. and causes us more pain and anger, resulting in surrounding people avoiding us. On the other hand, people who hold the key to his own happiness not only can bring joy to himself, but also to others. His mental state is a staple, and he is in control of his emotions.

[04:26]

Knowing exactly how to maintain a healthy balance, the state of mind, he can lead a relaxed and happy life without pressure from others, whether at home or work or monastery. Where is your key of happiness? Is it in the hand of someone else? Hurry and get it back. Now I would like to share some verses of the Chinese Zen monastery. And also I forgot his name, sorry. The verses go like this. Happiness is when things go your way. Anger appears when they don't. Just look at the puppet perform. Only a pile of twigs when done. This body turns hot and cold.

[05:28]

Don't be fooled by the grace of the mind and body. Keep your mind calm and tranquil to be in touch with your true nature. A beautiful verse. The surrounding conditions and environment can give rise to rid, anger, and ignorance. From there, karma is created causing suffering. Words that while angry can cause irreparable damages. Also, decisions made while anger is raging can cause regrettable results. Can you remember a time when that happened with you or someone you loved? May I... Take some illustration.

[06:29]

Dad is ready to leave for work. The daughter accidentally spilled the coffee on his white shirt. Dad got angry and yelled at her as he went upstairs to change into a different shirt. The daughter got upset and cried and refused to go to school. Mom took time to calm her down. Dad dropped her off at school. And being late for work, he sped and got pulled over and got a ticket. The boss yelled at him for being late. As he sat down at his desk, he realized that he forgot a crucial document at home. Such a terrible day for death resulting from a single moment of anger. Just because... He allowed the surrounding conditions and environment to control his emotions.

[07:31]

And I'm wondering if I am sometimes in the same case. Now, how to be the master of our mind? There are some steps to help us. to be the master of our minds. First, recognize when we react to outside conditions because it is really easy to react immediately when we have confronted some imposed case, opposing case. Take For example, take a ping pong ball. You know the ping pong ball? And it bounces when it hits against a hard surface. Oh, Hoàng, go to my package and then take the stumbler.

[08:40]

The stumbler. The stumbler. When we... when we bounce the ping pong ball, and if it hits against a hard surface like this, it would bounce back immediately. But if that ball hits a mattress or soft material, it would not bounce back. And it will fly straight when thrown in the air. ping pong pong symbolizes the surrounding conditions and environment. The heart surface, mattress, or air symbolizes our ego. If the ego is as solid and unbending as a heart surface, we believe in the ego, in the self,

[09:52]

thinking this is my body, this is mine, then we will easily react to everything. If our mind is more flexible, with a smaller self-ego, we may have less of an attitude and wouldn't be too quick to react when facing adverse situations. However, that mad impression is still lingering. But if our mind is open and free like the air, everything will come and go without leaving a trace like the path of a bird in flight. Therefore, no signs of anger and suffering. The moment we are aware of what our eyes see, our ears hear, the sensation of the body, our mind immediately differentiates and reacts with likes and dislikes.

[11:02]

We may think it is totally natural to do so, but in reality, it is the very first link to the chain of suffering. The moment we are aware, but when the mind likes what exists, hears, tastes, or feels, it tends to grasp and want to hold on to the source of happiness and fears of losing that source. That is when the seeds of greed and fears are sown. And on the contrary, when our mind dislikes what it sees, it hears, It will push away and avert the source of dislike. And when the mind constantly has to face those dislikes, it becomes annoyed and the seed of anger is sown. Everything stems on a deep, hidden root of ignorance, where the mind mistaken believes that everything, this body, is ego, all things in the world.

[12:17]

is real. And the teaching of the Buddha on read, anger and ignorance over more than 2,500 years ago still holds true in our everyday activities. We hear, read and understand theoretically this trial. However, we are not able to recognize them in real life as they arise in us. Then, that leads to our practice to recognize the arising of our thoughts in our minds through these three forms, grief and anger and ignorance. In our daily lives, our thinking mind is continuously spinning. Seldom do we see that what we are running after the at-the-moment conditions and are greatly affected and be controlled by them.

[13:24]

Hence, the rising of desire and aversion appear depending on how the conditions drive us, drive our thoughts. So, as you can see, it is very important for us to learn to observe ourselves. to recognize the moment our thoughts are created, so we don't react to them. In that way, we remain in the driver's seat, or in other words, we are the key holder to our own happiness. our mind and thoughts as us. We say, I think, I'm happy, I'm sad. But with the practicing, with the practice of observing, when a thought or an emotion arises, the control of every action or the key is in our hands.

[14:38]

We are the master. And we can choose to be in control or be controlled by those thoughts and emotions. When we plan an event, we think, we calculate, discuss, we are in the driver's seat using our thinking mind. The key is currently in our hands. However, in the process, we encounter an opposing idea. We become annoyed. And anger ensues when the opposing party raises his voice. So at this point, if we pause and recognize that everything starts within our mind,

[15:40]

not from that condition. We find that it starts within our mind, so we keep calm and not allow the angry feelings drive us. Continue to observe our feelings and the situation. Then the key is a still in our hands. Do you think this practice is easy? Just start. and discover the answer for ourselves. We can hear and understand it. It seems simple. But when we practice, it depends on the ego. We may be controlled or in control. I may tell a story of a couple who of an elderly couple married since they were high school sweethearts.

[16:48]

They never argued. On her deathbed, the wife asked her husband to retrieve a box at the bottom of a drawer. He patiently listened as she explained the content inside the box. That is a doll and a stack of money. She said, the day I married you, my mother advised me to always be patient and never speak or react when angry. When angry, just take our yarn and knit and only talk. to your husband after your anger has subsided. And all the years living with you, I have never raised my voice because I took my mother's advice to heart.

[17:57]

The husband looked at the box and said, on those years, you were only angry at me one time? Because there is only one doll here. No, many times. No, there is only one doll inside the box. Oh, I've sold the other doll and saved this money. Do you have a way of practicing patience with your loved ones? What do you do when you feel the angry build of inside? Do you have any dull? So from this story, can you take this practice of patience into your own life? When we practice observing our thoughts, our emotions,

[19:08]

then we will find that the emotion naturally disappears. If we just observe, and after a while of diligent practice, we will realize that the nature of the emotions and the thinking mind is not real. They just arise when the conditions are present, and they disappear when the conditions are gone. And this thing we cannot understand theoretically. Only when we practice observing, reflecting, we will see that everything, thoughts and emotions, just come. If we don't follow them, they just come and go, appear and disappear.

[20:20]

And we don't need to do anything with this. This we call effortless pathway. The shortest way to discover our innate nature. Because our innate nature is as spacious, always clear as blue sky without any clouds. And emotions and thoughts and frustration, depression, everything just are like the clouds come and go in the sky. we accept it as our nature. We identify ourselves with thoughts and emotions conditioned by the environment as ourselves.

[21:27]

Or we recognize and live with our true nature. That is very important. Usually we mistake our And we identified a self-thinking mind, annoyed mind, emotions as ourselves. And that makes things problems. But if we just observe and see it coming and going, like a guest, so we're still staying in our true nature. Then we will go to the next step, that is, balance the harmony of the mind. Humans have the natural tendency to pursue happiness.

[22:30]

And we continuously chase after fun and pleasure and eventually recognize two things. All moments of happiness and joy quickly passes. And trying to hold onto it is like our hands holding onto water. We cannot keep water in our hands. And the second, like a coin, everything in this life always has two sides. The other side of happiness is uneasiness or fear of losing it. I bring this tumbler. How can I do this? This is the tumbler.

[23:32]

You see? Thank you so much. Thank you. have two. And when I push it forward or backward, or I make it like this. And then after a while, be still again, get its own balance. And nothing can make it lose this balance. Why? Please tell me why this tumbler never, even if it falls down, and then again it would get back its balance.

[24:50]

And why? Please tell me. This is the key of happiness. No one can take away our own happiness. Nothing can make us lose our own balance and happiness. And why? Please help me with the answer. In the core, yes. Thank you so much. In the core, it has what? Its own balance. Like when we walk, we go on a hike, or maybe flat surface, or... rocky or uneven, still we don't fail because our body has its own balance and it can flexibly fix itself to adjust to the condition.

[26:07]

And if we know what is our true nature, what is our real nature, It is inside. And then any conditions outside just make us a little bit like this. But then no one can make us lose that balance. Balance is formless. We cannot touch, balance, or see it however it exists in all physical phenomena in every psychological state. It is present in every moment of our life. And are we even aware of it?

[27:15]

Do we often lose the gallant and fall into boredom, depression, or suffering? When we practice how to observe those things that are happening and the arising of our thinking mind, our emotions, we develop the ability to solve any problem without attachment or being affected. Our mind achieves its net. Natural balance. May I tell you another story? This is a story of a rich man in his mid-fifties who has a severe disease. He felt as if he would not be living on this earth much longer, and therefore he was very fearful and suffered greatly. He visited an old monk in seclusion at a very old temple on top of a mountain.

[28:21]

After listening to the man, the old monk said, there is no medication that can help you. But I do have a solution for you. And the monk gave that person three And he said, in these three labeled envelopes are three prescriptions. You open the envelopes in order and follow the instructions carefully. Only open the next envelope after you've completed what was prescribed in the previous envelope. The rich man was very happy, thanked the monk, and laughed and laughed. As soon as he got home, he opened the first envelope.

[29:25]

He was shocked to find only these words. Go to the beach for 21 days straight, and each day lie on the beach for 30 minutes. That's all. He was skeptical after reading this prescription, but he had no other choice but to give it a try. He ended up lying on the beach for more than two hours every day. At that point, he realized that all his days prior passed away with tons of work. And his mind was always thinking of ways to get more money, to get more fame. He never had time to relax at the beach, listening to the soothing waves or seeing the seagulls like these present days.

[30:30]

He felt an overwhelming sense of ease and comfort. On the morning of the day, 22nd day, he opened the second envelope to find these words written. For the next 21 days, find five fish or clams on the beach and release them back into the ocean. Again, he was filled with skepticism, but persevered and followed the instruction. Every day he would find little fish or tiny shrimps flapping around on the beach with the incoming waves and releasing them back into the ocean. Even though he didn't understand the purpose of this practice, but his heart was moved when he saw those

[31:36]

helpless creatures happily swim back into the deep ocean. And when the 43rd day arrived, the man opened the last envelope and carefully read the instructions. Each day for 21 days, find a branch, and write all your disappointments and hate on the sand. He followed the instruction diligently, but only to find that not long after writing, the waves would come and erase those words of his hatred and disappointment. The waves come and erase everything. the rich man suddenly realized something and started to cry. When he finished all his prescriptions, he came home feeling like a completely new man.

[32:49]

He felt light, relaxed, and totally at ease. He had forgotten all about his fear of dying. plagued him before. Then he went to visit the old monk to say thank you to him. The monk just smiled and said, Did you know that people are unhappy because they have not learned three things? The man replied, Dear monk, please tell me what are those three things. Do you want to hear these three things? Go to the monk on the top of the mountain. The old man slowly explained as he looked into the space in front of him. Firstly, people are sucked into the vortex of fame and money and forget to rest.

[34:01]

Do you usually forget to rest? Are you too busy to have a short rest every day? Secondly, in order to receive happiness, one must first give it. In order to receive happiness, one must first give it. And lastly, one must learn. to let go. Don't hold on to things that don't serve you, such as negative emotions like hate, anger, everything. Let it go. All his life, this rich man constantly worried and busy. I'm wondering if I'm always worried and busy.

[35:03]

Pursuing money and fame, or we can pursue something else. But even spiritual pursuit, it is also a pursuit of something. And this rich man, In those days on the beach, he truly lived the present moment. He realized the simple truth that we often forget is to live in the moment. This is easy to understand or easy to say to live the moment. But in fact, Our mind is always busy with things have to do, with plans to do.

[36:09]

And we cannot really, truly contact with the moment, leave the moment. And the last part of my talk is the part of A long time ago, Prince Shijata went into the forest in search of the truth, the true happiness, the end of suffering, and he attained alignment underneath the banyan tree. Four many years after, he taught people methods of practice. to recognize the inner Buddha that inherently exists in everyone. Being enlightened and liberated is to be free of the factor of suffering and dissatisfaction.

[37:15]

We study and practice the Dharma in hoping to find the inner Buddha. and be liberated like Buddha. This is truly holding the key of our own happiness. No one and nothing can take away that happiness. So the important thing here is we would not pursue happiness from outside. But we find out the Buddha in ourselves, realize our true nature, and that is our true happiness. That is the true key of happiness. And a person who radiates happiness from within is capable of sending that happiness, that happy energy to other people and the surrounding area.

[38:26]

In order to achieve that, we should add some kinds of daily meditation practice as you are here, practice every day in the center. Only go in word to reflect and recognize the coming and going of false. Very simple. And in that way, one can start to recognize the same patterns of daily life. And we can gain back our own balance. Nothing from the surroundings can easily affect us as before. We can create our true happiness from inside. Even though this practice seems individualistic, there is a sense of community in our practice as well.

[39:38]

As we prostrate and take refuge before each practice, we bow to the Buddha, the Dharma, and last but not least, the Sangha. Let's focus on the Sangha for a bit. Sangha has a few meanings, one of which is community. The Sangha can be visualized with our root guru, our fellow practitioners, our family and friends, all the sentient beings. No matter what Buddhist tradition we follow, whether sitting in meditation or reciting the names of Buddha and Bodhisattva or chanting mantras, The Sangha plays an important role. If every person and Sangha practice to become a better person and community, then the cumulative effect would be a happy and peaceful home.

[40:42]

This meditation practice of self-reflection is for everyone regardless of faith. Following this path, is holding the key of happiness in our own hands. It is also the path for each of us to again return to our true nature, Buddha nature, and create a happy environment for all. Thank you for listening. Thank you for listening to this podcast offered by the San Francisco Zen Center. Our Dharma talks are offered at no cost and this is made possible by the donations we receive. Your financial support helps us to continue to offer the Dharma. For more information, visit sfcc.org and click Giving. May we fully enjoy the Dharma.

[41:38]

@Transcribed_UNK
@Text_v005
@Score_98.72