This podcast is offered by the San Francisco Zen Center on the web at www.sfcc.org. Our public programs are made possible by donations from people like you. Good morning. Welcome to Beginner's Mind Temple. My name is Erin Merck and I am a San Francisco Zen Center priest, but by day, I work as a high school teacher. So I come occasionally here to offer talks. And I'm really delighted to be able to spend the morning here with you today. So thank you very much to Artanto, Tim, for inviting me to do so. And I truly hope that you leave here with a little practice nourishment to sustain you and to give a little life to your practice. So thanks very much.

[01:00]

This week, perhaps like many of you, I've been thinking a lot about what it means to be a human, what's special about being a human being, what's problematic about being a human being, what our future as humans might be, and how we can face all of these questions and all of the emotions that may be arising as we hear and sit in the middle of the onslaught of news, kind of like the roaring stream of the news cycle. And as I've been thinking about this, just kind of sitting with it, turning it, was kind of tending to the experience. I realized that I wanted to go back to an old teaching that I find really quite nourishing and helpful and hopefully will give something to chew on for that question, for feelings that you also may be sharing with me during this time.

[02:25]

So this early teaching comes from one of the earliest collection of the Buddha's actual discourses. It's called the Samyutta Nikaya. And before I actually dive into the story, one of the kind of miraculous and hopeful aspects of humanness that I sometimes remember to contemplate is how technologically incredible we actually are just in ourselves. And we only have access to these teachings because human beings carried them in their bodies for hundreds and hundreds of years. Before we had the ability to write things down, these teachings were actually memorized, carried, contemplated, turned past from person to person, from warm hand to warm hand.

[03:31]

And when I think about that and kind of what we're able to hold onto and pay attention to now, maybe, you know, some of the skills that we put our attention towards instead of something as possibly potentially tedious as memorizing text. Anyway, I feel inspired and just kind of amazed that we're actually able to access these very old, precious teachings. So this story that I want to focus on is called The Tangle, and I imagine that Many of you might be familiar with this story. It's a story that really speaks to our moment and possibly every moment that humans have experienced since that time.

[04:34]

And like many, if not all, of the Buddha's discourses, this centers on a real or supposedly real interaction between the Buddha and the Buddha. one of his students. So it's a teaching story, but it's also a story of people meeting each other face to face, people intimately knowing each other, listening to each other's practice, listening to each other's kind of inmost concern, and responding, meeting each other. So I find it a very, just a beautiful reminder of what's possible for us when we actually can slow down enough to find those questions and to be able to create communities where we can ask them together, where we can turn them together. So this story focuses on the meeting between a fellow named Jata and apparently Jata

[05:47]

actually means tangle. So the word person's name means tangle. And Jata says to the Buddha himself, a tangle within, a tangle without, people are entangled in a tangle. Gautama, which is the name of the Buddha, Gautama, I ask you this, who can untangle this tangle? A tangle within, a tangle without. People are entangled in a tangle. Gautama, I ask you this. Who can untangle this tangle? So I remember the first time I heard this teaching was actually right here in the Buddha Hall. And I think it was within the first year of...

[06:48]

starting to practice here. So it was about 25 years ago, which is hard to imagine. And I remember experiencing a kind of resonant surprise at how contemporary, how close this question felt to what I was experiencing, to the kinds of questions that brought me into this space and led me to explore what other ways What else can I do with my human life? What should I do with my human life? So it surprises me every time I hear it. Who can untangle this tangle? Feels like such a human, such a familiar question. And even the language, the visceral feeling and quality of tangledness feels so accurate right now. I'm not sure if it resonates for you, but for me still feels very accurate.

[07:50]

And I feel like the question itself, reading it again, as I was kind of thinking about how to approach today's, the time today, really just pointing me towards how to live, how to point my human life in a direction away from all of the confusion and speed, away from the distracting, kind of urgent feeling around me towards what's actually going to help me and help others move towards justice, towards liberation, towards a different narrative, a different vision for ourselves as humans. A tangle within, a tangle without, people are entangled in a tangle.

[09:04]

Gautama, I ask you this, who can untangle this tangle? So while the question itself is quite touching and resonant for me personally, it's the Buddha's answer and response that helps nudge me and direct me and kind of shine the light towards how to respond. So receiving this very heartfelt question from a student from someone he's working with, someone he's probably familiar with and intimately engaged in practice with.

[10:11]

The Buddha says to Jatta, a person established in virtue, discerning, developing discernment and mind, a practitioner, Ardent, astute, she can untangle this tangle. Those whose passion, aversion, and ignorance have faded away. Devoted practitioners, their affluence ended. For them, the tangles untangle. Where name and form, along with perception, of impingement in form, totally stop without trace. That's where the tangle is cut. A person established in virtue, discerning, developing discernment and mind.

[11:24]

A practitioner, ardent, astute, she can untangle this tangle. Those whose passion, aversion, and ignorance have faded away. Devoted practitioners, their affluence ended, for them the tangles untangled. Where name and form, along with perception of impingement and form, totally stop without trace, That's where the tangles cut. So personally, I find something quite grounding and also reassuring about the calm, matter-of-fact response to this question that seems potentially so overwhelming and so unanswerable.

[12:28]

Who can untangle this tangle? It feels like an overwhelming task and responsibility. It feels almost impossible to try to find the pieces, to try to figure out where to pull, where to tug, what to do, how to handle this big knotted mess. We want to know, how do we untangle this tangle? And the Buddha, with gentleness, I think, but also quite firmly, pushes the question back to jatta, pushes the tangle back towards him, and reminds him of practice. We see two simple practices in this response. How do we untangle the tangle? starts with virtue, those established in virtue.

[13:31]

So it starts with precepts. How do we actually, where do we aim our actions? Where do we point our actions? How do we at least try to make an effort towards wholeness, towards uprightness, towards skill, even if it's not perfect? We have a template of precepts. And the next piece, of this response to jata, our practice. Actually starting with ourselves, starting with our own bodies and minds, starting with our own karmic experience, our karmic conditions, that's really the only place that we can start. Starting with the tangle, with the edges of tangle, the pieces of tangle that we can contact. that we can shine our own practice light on. A person established in virtue, a person who's working, who's engaged with precepts, with what it means to be an ethical human, knowing

[14:55]

all the possible routes that we can take as humans. We know that there's some percentage of chance that we can go off and do a lot of harm as humans. We have that tendency. It's right in our first noble truth. Humans have a tendency to be deeply confused. And this deep, deep confusion gives us this itchy, edgy, speedy quality, makes us want to run out of our skin to distract ourselves, to numb ourselves, to turn away, to do anything but actually face the pieces of the tangle that land inside of us that are ours to take care of. So the Buddha says, Here you go. You've got a practice template.

[15:57]

You get to untangle the tangle. Where name and form, along with perception of impingement and form, totally stop without trace. That's where the tangle is cut. actually gathering our attention from all the places that it can go and bringing it back to ourselves, turning it back onto our own experience, getting really small and really slow, which in my experience is hard to do, especially when the culture around us is moving so fast and is so complex and takes us really easily out of our grounded and embodied experience.

[17:05]

So the Buddha says, don't forget your, don't forget your inmost requests. Don't forget the vows that you want to take as a human. Don't forget that you can actually stop. You can stop. You can turn your attention to yourself. You can turn your attention to your own piece of the tangle. And bit by bit, we untangle our tangle. You untangle your tangle. No one's going to untangle the tangle for us. So working in a high school myself, as you can imagine, is a very speedy, vibrant place.

[18:22]

And because we're an independent high school in San Francisco, and there's lots of competition to kind of both keep the school keeping it interesting and relevant for the time we're in, very focused on the question of technology, of what's the most important, what are the most important skills for young people to be engaged in, to come away with? What is a portrait of a graduate right now? What skills should they leave with? And sometimes I'm surprised at what, how confusing this question really is. Do we prepare? Do we put young people, do we equip young people with all of the technologies blooming around us? Do we kind of immerse them in that? Do we get them ready to be competitive and to be part of this boom and development and

[19:29]

vision that's growing around us? Or do we give them skills to look critically at how the culture is developing, to be able to look around and see what's happening, to actually have contact with their bodies, to actually be embodied? It's a big question. And I happen to work in a department It's called body-mind education. And it's a required, it is a required course still for 9th and 10th graders. And we're able to offer practices of various mind-body disciplines like yoga, also rock climbing and different somatic exercises. inquiries as well as health education. And our program this year was cut in half.

[20:34]

So now there's just a little bit of embodiment education for kids and a little bit more technology, a little bit more of kind of staying competitive and keeping up with how the culture is changing. And what I'm noticing, and then there's a big question about phones in the classroom and what's okay, what's not okay. How do we keep students from using AI? Or do we let them use AI to teach them how to use the tool? What do we do? And what I'm noticing is how confused, how exhausted, how... in some cases anxious and depressed, the students are feeling how much they just want to be in their bodies, really. So almost every day I get a question from kids, Ms.

[21:41]

Burke, can we just go outside and like lay down on the grass? It's really what they want to do. It's kind of the most exciting thing that they could imagine. And sometimes I'll be able to say, sure, I think we can do that. And sometimes it feels like there's a lot of pressure to kind of fit, squeeze content into them, which seems ironic given that our focus is body-mind education. I think there's this sense in our culture that there's just never enough time, that we're kind of speeding along, that we're not often able to move at a pace that actually lines up with our human bodies. And so having permission and having reminders to be embodied, and even being reminded of the simplest practices that we can do to awaken that sense, that incredible human capacity to be present with ourselves,

[22:53]

It seems so small in the midst of these big emerging advancements to our culture and society. But it's really otherwise we're making ourselves very sick, in my opinion. We're making ourselves unable to actually be the incredible beings that we are and to realize our potential as humans. when I think about someone carrying this incredible canon of teachings in their bodies, it's hard to imagine being able to pay attention that long, to remember to take in not just the words but the meaning of these teachings, carry them around like they're something precious, and be able to pass them along just through our bodies. So I thought we could do a very, very simple experiment just to kind of show and just to kind of remind ourselves that embodiment is available.

[24:00]

And we don't, you know, we have, we happen to have this beautiful space that we can access here at city center and we have these cushions, we have an altar, we have a lot of beautiful forms and structures around us that can be very helpful. and help us feel like this is important and this is maybe ceremonial and something that's going to help us make meaning. But really, even when you're just on the bus or walking down the street, embodiment is available. You don't have to actually be in these special conditions. So I want us to experiment with a very, very simple practice of Just noticing the breathing body, if you're willing. And if you're not so into it, it's okay. No one will know. Whatever. You can't really see into your mind, so you do you. But to do this practice, I want to recommend that you actually close your eyes, which is not something that we do in our Zazen practice.

[25:09]

We usually practice with eyes open. Just close your eyes to take that sense of vision. to give it a break. And take a moment just to locate the movements of your breathing body. And you perhaps can envision your awareness or your perception as a very soft flashlight, just a very soft light. So not like trying to chase a mountain lion through the city, or like just very gently, very gently noticing. As you locate your breathing body, take a moment just to notice.

[26:34]

Can you find, can you sense, the particular textures, feelings, shape of your breath. If you picture your breath like ink spreading on a tissue paper, what shape does it make? Can you find the point of beginning of your in-breath? What happens

[27:51]

just before you take your exhale. If you let go of you breathing, just relax into this body breathing itself. How does it feel for you? And now if we transition back into allowing, you can open your eyes just a little bit if you want to.

[29:03]

What is it? What's it like to include a little bit of vision, a little bit of sense of sight? Do we lose the breath? What happens? I want to propose that this kind of simple, very basic present moment awareness, present moment embodiment, is really fundamental towards untangling our tangles.

[30:09]

I think I'll speak for myself. Sometimes I feel a lot of pressure to do and feel like I almost can't do enough, I can't be enough, or be in as many places, doing as many things as I feel like I should be. And that's true. We're embodied creatures. We live here, right here. This is where our life is unfolding, and it's the only life that we actually have is right here in our bodies. So finding ways back to yourself, finding ways to build capacity for presence and attention is one of the most important paths and practices that we can do together.

[31:15]

I know for myself when I see others, for example, my partner, Mary, she's very, very devoted every morning to making space for sitting no matter what's happening in her life. And when I see her do that, and I'm often very frantic in the morning and getting ready to go, it just, it's a mirror. It echoes back to me and I feel like, oh yeah, embodiment is Don't leave the house. Don't try to form relationships, connect with others before connecting and reconnecting with myself without really being in my body, being grounded, understanding and feeling and sensing all those points of tangle, kind of understanding what I'm working with before I leave the house. So this practice may seem too simple.

[32:24]

And, you know, there's more, obviously. The precepts are a whole other practice. I think the two really go hand in hand. And so being able to cultivate, to be able to stand it enough to be in your body and to be present with yourself is, makes the space to actually be able to receive some of the other teachings that may help us really tangle through the questions that we have about how, like, what do we do? How do I engage? How do I really engage with the question? But if we do that from a space that's not grounded and embodied, then we're just, it's just an intellectual question. and we're disconnected from this field of our actual life, of our actual present body awareness.

[33:30]

So obviously here at City Center, there are lots of opportunities for people to come and join the community for practice. and to practice together and just by your choice to be here today already shows, already kind of speaks to a shared vision, a shared value for doing something that's really quite different than what's going on out there around us. And if If people need more inspiration and connection, that is also available. And in our Zen tradition, we're so much about having a warm hand, a warm hand connection with teachers and with our kind of Sangha, with our Dharma friends, that practicing alone

[34:47]

is not recommended. It's not really the particular way or flavor of Zen, which is, I think, what also makes it very relevant to this collective tangle that we're in. That is something we need to have that space where we take care of our own pieces. of the tangle, we need to have that time and devote that time and actual slowing down enough to do that. But we're also going to be doing it together. We also want to open our eyes and see the people around us and interact and engage and connect and talk about what's actually happening, talk about what we're actually experiencing when we close our eyes and try to be present with ourselves.

[35:49]

So just a plug for community, for the community space here, right in the middle of the city, and all of the ways that y'all can come and be part of what's happening here, as you already are. So in closing, I wanna share the end of this particular story of Jatta and the Buddha. Okay. So after receiving the Buddha's response and the Buddha's teaching, Jatta experiences an incredible shift of mind. So after a person established in virtue, discerning, developing discernment and mind, A practitioner, ardent, astute, she can untangle this tangle.

[36:52]

Those whose passion, aversion, and ignorance have faded away. Devoted practitioners, their affluence ended. For them, the tangles untangled. Where name and form, along with perception of impingement and form, totally stop without trace. That's where the tangle is cut. Hearing the Buddha's words, the Brahmin, Jatabharadvaja, said to the Blessed One, Magnificent Master Gautama, magnificent, just as if he were to place upright what was overturned, to reveal what was hidden, to show the way to one who was lost, or to carry a lamp into the dark so that those with eyes could see forms. In the same way has Master Gotama, through many lines of reasoning, made the Dharma clear. I go to the Blessed One for refuge, to the Dharma, and to the community of monks.

[37:55]

Let me obtain the going forth in Master Gotama's presence. Let me obtain admission. Then the Brahmin, Jata Bharadvaja, received the going forth and the admission in the Blessed One's presence. And not long after his admission, dwelling alone, secluded, heedful, ardent, and resolute, he in no time reached and remained in the supreme goal of the holy life for which the Sangha rightly go forth from home into homelessness, knowing and realizing it for himself in the here and now. Miraculous change of heart. So thank you again for your, just your choice to be here today. There are lots of places that you could be besides choosing a Dharma talk and just wanting to extend out there wishes again that you each find courage and support that you need for your practice journey, that the people around you

[39:04]

offer inspiration and support, and that together we meticulously untangle this tangle. So thank you very much. Thank you for listening to this podcast offered by the San Francisco Zen Center. Our Dharma talks are offered at no cost, and this is made possible by the donations we receive. Your financial support helps us to continue to offer the Dharma. For more information, visit sfcc.org and click Giving. May we fully enjoy the Dharma.

[39:42]

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