This podcast is offered by the San Francisco Zen Center on the web at www.sfcc.org. Our public programs are made possible by donations from people like you. I see some friends. So, my name is Judith King, and I'm going to read. my talk tonight because I'm old and twice concussed and brain-glied. So it would just be better for all of us if I do it this way. Okay. Here's some backstory to explain how I ended up being Tenzo head cook at City Center in in January of 2000.

[01:01]

Through grace and good fortune, I went into... There's some echo here. Is that this? Or should I just take out my hearing aid? I think I'm going to take these out. Here we go. Much better. Through grace and good fortune, I went into Tassajara in the spring of 1994 for a work period. I had no idea what I was getting into. I was a carpenter by trade and a general contractor. I give our late friend Gene DeSchmidt, the general contractor of the new bathhouse project at the time, credit for sucking me in. It turned out Gene needed a free carpenter. I needed Zen practice, and San Francisco Zen Center needed a carpenter and a superintendent.

[02:08]

I didn't know it at the time, but I was running away from home in January of 1995. I ran away to Green Gulch, was only going to do one practice period, and and ended up staying and participating in two practice periods that year and worked on the maintenance crew. In January of 1996, Rev. Anderson, then the abbot of the San Francisco Dent Center, started a three-week intensive for people, a short practice period for people that couldn't do a three-month practice period. I was asked by Maya Wender, the director, to work in the kitchen so that a kitchen worker could sit the intensive. I didn't want to do it, but I did it anyway. I had a realization during that time that I was warm and dry in the kitchen for the first time in years.

[03:16]

Instead of doing maintenance during the worst winter, didn't have to sit so much, and the kitchen had the best schedule in all of the Zen Center. I went to the director and said I thought staying in the kitchen after the intensive would be good for my practice. That turned into a year in the kitchen. Lita Barrows, the late Lita Barrows, was the Tenzo. He was one of the kindest people I've known. I reluctantly went into Tassajara in January of 1997 and worked on the maintenance crew during my first practice period, Tongario. Who's done Tongario? Leslie James, the abiding teacher at Tassajara, was the director then. I had contemplated leaving Tassajara and Zen Center since Tongario.

[04:20]

and toward the end of the practice period, she asked if we could talk. She said there was no one at Tassajara to be head of shop, and would I please be the head of shop for the spring work period and for the summer? She knew how to draw me in. That was the beginning of my creating a job. for myself supervising the small and some not so small construction projects during work periods. I worked in the kitchen for two practice periods in the fall of 1997 and the spring of 1998 because the schedule was better and not so much sitting. Sound familiar? While I was in the kitchen, Robert Thomas, the Tenzo, read short paragraphs in the book How to Cook Your Life. From the Zen Kitchen to Enlightenment, Dogen's classic instructions for the Zen cook, Tenzo Kyokun, at our morning bow-in.

[05:25]

When I went back to the shop, I thought it would be great to read short sections at the morning shop bow-in during the work period and then through the summer. Here's one of the first passages I read because there were a few people who left tools out on jobs, And the shop was a mess, even though my instruction every morning was just like this instruction to the cook. Clean the chopsticks, ladles, and all other utensils, tools. Handle them with equal care and awareness, putting everything back where it naturally belongs. Keep your mind on your work and do not throw things around carelessly. Here's another along the same line. Conscientiously wash out the rice container in the soup pot along with any other utensil that were used. Put those things that naturally go on a high place onto a high place and those that would be most stable on a low place onto a low place.

[06:33]

Things that naturally belong on a high place settle best on a high place. while those which belong in a low place find their greatest stability there. On the no-race weekend in 1998, after a walk up the mountain on a beautiful spring day, I was asked by Mary Mosin, then the director of City Center, to be Tenzo. Because it was my birthday, and I had an abundance of endorphins, he said yes. In January of 1999, I left Tassajara and lived at Jamesburg for nine months before going to City Center. I still supervised construction during the work periods. Here are some short stories from my time as Tenzo. Linda Cutts had been

[07:38]

my practice leader while I was at Green Gulch. I heard that she was coming to City Center for practice discussions with students and I signed up. Usually the Tenzo has five workers in the kitchen, but they only gave me two. I know. I complained. I complained to her about it. She said, Judith, Deborah Madison was the head cook here at City Center, and she did it alone. I said, I'm not Deborah Madison. Some years later, Zen Center honored Deborah Madison at Green's Restaurant. I couldn't go because I was supervising construction during the work period at Tassajara. Her email address was on the announcement. So I wrote her a note and told her that Tenzo before me had carefully taken all of the pages out of her book, the wonderful cookbook called Vegetarian Cooking for Everyone, three-hole punched it, every page, and put them in binders with her recipes times 40 people.

[08:57]

That's right. I used it a lot. I also told her about Linda's comment. She wrote me a very sweet note and said Linda wasn't remembering correctly. Being Tenzo was really hard, especially doing it alone. Another story. I was in the hallway outside the kitchen. Kocha McCall came running up to me and said, John Grimes said there's a crisis in the kitchen. What crisis? He said, we're out of coffee. Okay. Another. It is a crowd. An old monk came through the kitchen. This is another story. An old monk came through the kitchen. I can't remember his name now. Saw a pan full of food ready for dinner serve up. Stuck his finger in.

[10:01]

and lit the food off his finger. I said, stop. It reminded me of this in the Tezo Keogren. Under no circumstances allow anyone who happens to be drifting through the kitchen to poke his fingers around or look into the pot. And another, a young woman came to the Friday night public dinner. She came into the kitchen after the meal and said to me, that was the worst blah, blah, blah I've ever had. I was speechless. Then a man came in a few minutes later and said, that was the best blah, blah, blah I've ever had. Exactly. I had been at Tassajara for two years, and if anyone said anything at all, it was, thank you very much.

[11:02]

Except for a few senior teachers who had opinions. Okay. They won't be named. The last story is a dream I had while I was tenzo. I was at the stove at the city center cooking something in a big pot. John Grimes came up behind me and I said, John, it's burning. He said, turn up the heat and keep stirring. I left Zen Center on January 1st, 2001 and still supervised construction during the work period until the fall of 2008. And I've gone to all but a few work periods since 1994. I handed my job over to Bernie McPhillips in the fall of 2008, and then he passed it on to Peter Brock some years later. They've let me read from the Tenzo Kyokun after the morning bowing at the shop whenever I'm there. Every instruction to the cook is applicable to the workers in the shop.

[12:11]

Here are some of my favorite passages. The way-seeking mind of Atenzo is actualized by rolling up your sleeves. I brought a piece of olive wood from my family's farm into Tassajara one year, and a woman printed, The way-seeking mind is actualized by rolling up your sleeves on it. It hangs above the altar in the shop at Tassajara. I also made a short film about work as practice at Tassajara called rolling up your sleeves. In all the following passages, I always think of wood when greens are mentioned. When you prepare food, never view the ingredients from some commonly held perspective, nor think about them only with your emotions. Maintain an attitude that tries to build great temples from ordinary greens.

[13:14]

that expounds the Buddha Dharma through the most trivial activity. When making a soup with ordinary greens, do not be carried away by feelings of dislike towards them, nor regard them lightly. Neither jump for joy simply because you have been given ingredients of superior quality to make a special dish. By the same token that you do not indulge in a meal because of its particularly good taste, There is no reason to feel an aversion toward an ordinary one. Do not be negligent and careless just because the materials seem plain and hesitate to work more diligently with materials of superior quality. Your attitude towards things should not be contingent upon their quality. Handle even a single leap of a green piece of wood, in such a way that it manifests the body of the Buddha.

[14:15]

This in turn allows the Buddha to manifest through the leaf. This is a power which you cannot grasp with your rational mind. It operates freely according to the situation in a most natural way. At the same time, this power functions in our lives to clarify and settle activities and is beneficial to all living things. A dish is not necessarily superior because you have prepared it with choice ingredients, nor is a soup inferior because you have made it with ordinary greens. And handling and selecting greens would do so wholeheartedly with a pure mind and without trying to evaluate your quality in the same way in which you would prepare a splendid heath. One more. These things are truly just a matter of course, yet we remain unclear about them because our minds go racing about like horses running wild in the fields, while our emotions remain unmanageable, like monkeys swinging in the trees.

[15:25]

If only we would step back to carefully reflect on the horse and monkey, our lives would naturally become one with our work. Doing so is the means... whereby we turn things even while simultaneously we are being turned by them. It is vital that we clarify and harmonize our lives with our work and not lose sight of either the absolute or the practical. A joyful spirit is one of gratefulness and buoyancy. You should consider this carefully. If you had been born into some heavenly realm, you would most likely have only become attached to the pleasures of that realm, taking neither time nor opportunity to awaken the Bodhi Spirit, nor would you be likely to feel any particular necessity for practicing the Buddha Dharma, much less would you be able to prepare meals for the three treasures, despite there being the highest and most worthy of all things.

[16:30]

How fortunate we are to have been born as human beings, given the opportunity to prepare meals for the three treasures. Our attitude should surely be one of joy and gratefulness. And just a little aside, I do a gratitude practice every day. It helps. Okay. We should also reflect on what our lives might have been had we been born in one of the realms of hell. as an insatiable spirit, as some lowly animal, or as a demon. How difficult our lives would be if we suffered the misfortunes of these four circumstances or any other of the eight misfortunate conditions. We would be unable to practice the Dharma with the strength of the community, even though we had a mind to do so. Much less... We'd be able to prepare food with our own hands and offer it to the three treasures.

[17:32]

Our bodies and minds would be bound by the limitations and afflictions of those worlds and would have to suffer their burdens. I was born into what many would consider a heavenly realm, but then lived in a hell realm for some years. By the time I went into Tansahara for that first work period in 1994, I had been released from that hell realm for 13 years by practicing with a sober community. It's been a wonderful dovetail joint holding these two practices together. They were men and women whose eyes were open to what is most vital in a life of practice. enabling us to have contact with the Buddha, the reality of life. After service the last morning I was tenzo, there was a ceremony in the zendo to thank me.

[18:40]

Each of the senior teachers asked me a question. My friend, the late Abbas Blanche Hartman, asked, What does the tenzo do to you? First in the morning, I responded, wakes up. Thank you very much. And now we're going to watch Rolling Up Your Sleeve, which is a little short documentary I made, all filmed with Tassajaro. about work as fact. Suzuki Roshi, our original teacher, came from the tradition of work as a big part of practice.

[20:50]

Master Dogen emphasized practice as the entrance to enlightenment. Mikwa, what are you doing? I'm preparing for the day. And what's your function here at Zen Center? I'm a work leader. And without work practice, there's something missing in what we're doing. So I remember Suzuki Roshi saying, sweeping first, then zazen.

[21:53]

So kitchen practice, every aspect of practice of Tassajara, whatever people are doing, has the spirit of Zazen. And of course sitting is the central part of our practice, but also it's not the only thing. So we practice the spirit of zazen in all of our daily activities. So every single part of our, every single aspect of our life is included in our practice. practice is the same.

[23:58]

No matter whether you're general labor, digging a trench or the abbot or whatever, the practice is exactly the same for everybody. It's just that the activities are different. Nothing's ignored. Everything, every activity becomes an opportunity to practice. When we started Tazahara, we did all the work ourselves, but the work practice was really an important thing, because we had acquired a resort, and turning it into a monastery was what our practice was.

[26:31]

My experience is, it's kind of mystical experience, that when you start initiating a practice like this, carpenters will come. So when you can go back and forth between work and sitting zazen without any gap, without feeling any real significant change, then your practice is a pretty good place.

[27:55]

Following and leading is the same. When you're following, you're also leading. And when you're leading, you're also following. So it's a complete practice and not just one aspect of your life called meditation. Like work is what we're always doing. You know, well, you know, it doesn't work. But actually, it is work. Yeah, it's just, it doesn't really work to stay focused and to stay awake and to reassert your posture all the time.

[29:16]

A lot of work, plenty to do, you know. Thank you for listening to this podcast offered by the San Francisco Zen Center. Our Dharma talks are offered at no cost, and this is made possible by the donations we receive. Your financial support helps us to continue to offer the Dharma. For more information, visit sfcc.org and click Giving.

[30:21]

May we fully enjoy the Dharma.

[30:23]

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