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Buffalo passing through window koan. Farm and draft horses at GGF

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our intention
case situated within i to as vs
good evening
i also just a a couple things about myself just as a way of introduction my name is mark lester i see i took out one year leave of absence from rutgers in nineteen seventy three and then spent the next ten years at said center
that now i am
i was i was at tassajara
at us are for ten practice periods and six summers and i was here in between
i've lived here from nineteen seventy eight to nineteen eighty and i was working as part of the draft horse farming project here and managed to survive to tell about it barely
and ninety nineteen eighty three i was to director of tassajara and
we decided to go to just seem obvious at that point to leave and go to business school on wall street which is what i did
the end
more recently
ah see life i have two children who are on twenty and fifteen my suggestion was was born in my mind i was a tussle heart
i started a business called brush dance fifteen years ago that makes cards and calendars and journals with spiritual themes
i was
i was recently she's so in the city blessed and the fall practice created
i've been
coat leading company time on retreats for business people out here with norman fischer for the last five seven years span while
and i'm on
planning to be ordained as a priest with norman at the city centre this september
can brief sketch about me
been studying these past several months with norman the
collins and the com and i i feel like it's it's taken me many it's and i feel like for the first time the comments of come alive in some way from me and i wanted to talk about on
case thirty eight which says
whoops who said it is like a buffalo that passes through a latticed window it's head horns and four legs all pass through why can't its tail
pass through as well
i i phone i really love this story and
when i was thinking about this story i the the first image that came up for me was thinking about
being with my the birth of my children and being there as my children each pass through the opening of their mother and first the head
the arms and body and feet and there they there they were but there's still there's some part of them that still felt connected to something else something before they were born and in a way that that's something that was before they were born felt even more tangible and more
to connect as were connected to that and way than this this creature than just that just appeared
the and i also think of the time i spent with my mother as she was dying in breathing with her and that she was so president i was really trying to be present with heard with each breath and and then there was that
that last breath as i was sitting with her and kind of chanting with her breathing with her holding her hand and there was that last exhale and no and no more inhale and
and just being with her as she passed through and yet there she was still still there said this the sense of this this columns this tale
in the time
in woman's commentary he says if you can get upside down with this one discern it clearly and give a turning word to it
then you can meet the for obligations above and give comfort to the three existence is below
but if it is not yet clear pay close attention to the tail and you will resolve it at last

i also actually i i was when i was trying to think about what to talk about tonight i was also thinking about partly that it came up for me to talk about this case when i was thinking about green gulch and my relationship to green gulch and it's some in some way i i kind of here
like i never i never left here that there's still some part of me that remains i was just walking down in the fields sort of looking for that part i i was kind of combing through the
what used to be the old horse bins looking for some horse equipment of course there is there's little pieces of pieces of flowers and things all all around
and in some way there's some part there's some part of me that still feels like a you may not know this but there's a part of me that still feels like a resident here and sometimes when i come into green gulch i i just drive and park in the residents' parking lot and i call it x residents privilege
one of the m
one of the stories i was thinking about which i think we relate to this this feeling of is khan and the turning upside down is that a
a cousin of mine my my cousin gary who listen his visit florida he's a a a pretty kind of street business guy
we were talking about green gulch in my experience it's and center and he he told me that he had a blood pressure problems and was really concerned about kind of his life and death issues and asked if if i thought it would be a good thing for him to come to green gulch and learn to meditate and spend some time here and i said i thought it would be one
awful thing and he kind of this huge thing for him to rearrange his life to fly out from florida and come spend a weekend a green gulch this was this was several years ago i think four or five years ago at the time when norman was here and was abbott and i mentioned to norman that
my cousin gary was going to come and ask norman if he saunter you know police they can feel welcome
sir gary told me after he was kind of he wrote me this long letter about his experience at green gulch and whether the first things he said is that when he arrived here and he pulled up in the parking lot and and there was norman and norman came over and was very friendly and they talk for a few minutes and and ah
ahmed said
you know if you think that being here for a weekend is going to change your life you're wasting your time and i'm gary thought that was kind of a strange and welcoming committee
mckenna i think it's that to me it's that sense of that that you know that tell what is what does it mean to pass all the way through what we need to do and pass through
and then at the i think that it was also that same weekend warm and lectures and norman started his lecture that sunday morning by saying
i've been i've been practicing sasa know every day for the past twenty five years and i'm not sure that it's made any difference
the time and again my cousin gary is sitting there
some of his letter was very funny about man
but as in thinking about this this column
what it's when it saying to me is that
to practice to practice means to be fully alive
beyond ideas of and labels of success and failure
beyond our own fear greed grasping
even beyond ideas of coming and going arriving
and every moment
there's no there's also no avoiding success and failure and coming and going
in women's comment he says if you can get upside down with this one
that is turning really turning your world upside down and seeing things from a different perspective of perspective beyond
failure and success beyond right and wrong
it's it's only when we get upside down and see clearly can we give attorney word
only by turning our world upside down can speech come from a place that's clear enough unfettered enough to actually help others
and yet no matter no matter where we are in our practice
we have to do something we have to say something we're constantly we're constantly missing the mark constantly causing pain constantly causing confusion despite our best intentions
if it only weren't for that darn tail
does sometimes
sometimes we cherish that tail sometimes we think if that if that buffalo could only go all the way through right if we could only if we could only get to that endpoint of practice where know there was no more confusion we had arrived there's that sometimes we have such a foolish idea
this this cohen also made me think of a repeating dream that i have
it's a dream that i had a lot as a child and still every once in awhile have the stream where i'm i'm standing on the moon and suddenly i leap off the move backwards and i'm spinning in the air
but my head going over my feet and i'm just both terrified and and elated at the same time but more well i'm not sure which a little bit a little bit of both and and then suddenly i i land on my back and i wake and i wake up
and i'm not quite sure whether i'm dreaming or whether i'm awake whether i'm alive and whether i'm dead
and i'm i'm lying there i start to wake up and i'm lying there are no sweat i'm actually sweating from all that work of having flown through the air head over heels and again i think it's that feeling that would who's talking about of
being upside down
he says if you get upside down with this one discern it clearly and give attorney word then you can meet the for obligations again he's in this coins spelling out the path
get upside down see clearly say something or act act in some way that is authentic
meet our obligations by giving comfort
if you can get upside down with this one discern it clearly and give attorney word you can meet the for obligations which these are our parents
the place that we live all beings and the three treasures buddha dharma and sangha
i think it terms of this column these obligations as being
kind of using the metaphor the the the these obligations are the window in this column that we have to pass through
and that we can really only pass through and meet these obligations when we turn our lives upside down
no in some way it's really difficult it's amazing to me to see at at my age how difficult it is to really neat our parents and i am i continue to be amazed how much my parents are in me
and that tom
and really fully embracing the how much my own way of seeing things is both on fettered and clarified by what i inherited from my parents and like and my parents parents and
that those those seeds of my parents how they that could how powerful that conditioning is and how again the only way i feel like i can see that clearly and begin to work with that is in a way to to turn upside down

and i was thinking about that that sometimes i think it's
were first drawn to practice
when we finds when we find for some reason that are worlds have been turned upside down
we get a glimpse of how much
we're not really ourselves
and we get a glimpse of the possibility of actually being ourselves and finding a kind of real freedom finding are true spirit that
that we don't we don't we're not even aware of how much we're not ourselves until something happens that turns his upside down
and to me this turning upside down helps to helps me to see things with a fresh open heart
it means seeing everything as a gift and staying in touch with a part of us
that is somehow still connected to this mystery this mystery that i was talking about of the when children are born when we're with birth this mystery of the connection of before birth
interesting somehow that by that the only way that the only way to really turn upside down the only way to see things as fresh is to have our worlds to turned upside down which often can be
unexpected unpredictable and and quite painful
no usually we spend so much of our energy wanting things to be straight you know we want things to be clear and straight and avoid i'm just how difficult it upside down our own worlds can be that we it's so he
easy to avoid pain and difficulty

i was thinking of again in preparing for this talk i was thinking of harry roberts who can i it's funny i don't i i sometimes assume that will everyone in this how many people as room know who harry roberts was
so most but not everyone
harry was a
a uruk indian trained showman who was mostly irish but taught here for for many years was his some he designed the gardens at uc berkeley and it was quite a quite a brilliant difficult and crotchety ma'am
and but one of the things that he that he taught me taught me how to weld when i lived here
was funny i should i should just mentioned that
things were things worked a little bit differently back when when i during the time that i lived at zen center there was much less at least there was much less choice about what you did and where you went and i was some i had just been living at tassajara for a year and a half when
one day i was tapped on the shoulder and was told i was going to green gulch to go work with the draft horses and i i thought for sure someone had made a mistake that they must have misread my resume
everything that i had you know i i was a pretty good gymnast i did a lot of work with the horses and they must have somehow saw that
i thought and thought that therefore i will be good with draft draft horses and i had never i had never been by a horse in my entire life and and i was suddenly in charge of this draft horse farming program here here at green gulch and as my training was basically
i was introduced to these two horses snip and jerry
and was told that i my task was to learn how to farm
maybe i
i'll i'll tell i wanted to tell at least one sort of green gulch story here to lots of kringle stories but the the story that comes up as most prominent in a way in my days is what i think of is my and it's also very appropriate for this column i realize it may be a little bit of a stir
gretsch but not not too much
this was what i think of my most dramatic day at at green gulch was
a day well right not only was a take care of horses but we also had cows every day i was milking daisy the cow and
and we were also not only were we do we're also breeding horses and cows it was sink pretty incredible what we took on but
daisy had just given birth to a on
a calf and i i knew this daisy was as very sweet home jersey cow and typically there there's often there's real danger during this twenty four hour period after cows give birth particularly jerseys i had no i had read about it and
and in fact within within a few hours of her giving birth she suddenly a whip went down on her stomach which i had read meant that she was going to die within twenty four hours unless we we got of that out here and that it was
essential that that we keep her propped up that we'd not let her cows will die if the if they lie down the sea cows lying on their side so this was this was
probably like nineteen seventy nine and and this was right in the the first shed right before the first field was that was that was a milking shed
the garden shed ps and
and as soon as that as soon as daisy went down we call the vet who said you have to proper up and i was sitting in that shed with my back against the wall and my feet daisy i sort of prop prop keeping her propped up at and of course right next to her tail so that's how it's related to me
a africa
i told you it was a stretch
mom and a few hours later the vet came and givers this shop and she just kind of prop dried up and popped on your feet and she was fine and i wasn't survive i was going on
i was exhausted and i kind of dusted most kind of dusted myself off and i was walking walking back to the to the guy town and someone came running up to me said there's a horse stuck in the pond
the they didn't say this but the story be perfect if they said and you can only see her tail
the ground and i i said what mean there's a horse stuck in on and can worse than don't get stuck in the palm but so i i ran back to the to the back pond and snip had been grazing in there and apparently went to get a drink and walked in too far
and and and kept getting kind of sucked more and more into the pond and she was up
right up to her chest or any of you here for that
we we tried we tried various methods of getting her out all of which have failed until we we called the fire department and who somehow got and who to
twenty or thirty people from near beach and every and everyone at all of the forty or fifty residents here we wrapped fire hoses around so and and everyone pulled everyone pulled together on this fire hoses and pulled her out raw
course the a in a tell thirst for
berkeley so that was some that was my most exciting trip dramatic day at green and green gulch
i was starting to tell the story about harry roberts who taught me how to weld
one of the things about about coming to green gulch from tassajara is that
i had never done i had never done anything with my hands i'd never done anything physical and i realized that again looking back at my parents my my father was an electrician and a builder and like could fix anything it was constantly tinkering with things and and i think i think he consciously
he didn't think that was a kind of worthy
livelihood and he wanted me to be a professional so i think he showed me how to do absolutely nothing so that's what i knew in terms of physical things was absolutely nothing and i came here and being in charge of the horses part of that was learning learning how to handle horses
learning to fix horse equipment learning to come
so harness and part of that was learning to learning to weld and harry was my welding teacher and one of the things he said about welding was that he said that the secret of welding is to realize that the world is that everything is actually liquid and
and that by applying heat to things you return you return metal to its natural state which is liquid and then you can shape it and do whatever you want with it and and then in his own way he would let out this huge laugh and he said our lives are a lot
like this also that that actually our lives are liquid and that we just see them as frozen we just see ourselves we just have this this feeling of a self and is feeling of this being kind of stuck in this time and place and we think that that time is linear and
harry would say that you know from when you see that the world is liquid in some way we haven't as yet been born and we've already died in that that's the secret that we learn about our lives from from welding

no after
again my i feel like the in some way of the main one of the main things about this on is this
turning upside down get it getting upside down as a way of seeing clearly and
for me after being accent center for ten years i i chose to enter the business world and in some way this was a again i looking back i'm i'm not even quite sure you know how consciously or unconsciously i was making these decisions
in my life but in some way i think i chose to enter the business world as a way to be turned upside down in some way it was the it was the most difficult most contrary thing i could ever imagine doing
yeah it was contrary to every idea i had about myself about what i thought i'd be good out about what i thought i wanted to do
i'm at the same time it also seemed it also seemed really natural because when i i woke up one day having been director of tassajara and realized that what that my activity was i was engaged in business that i was though i was a
a zen monastic a lot of my activity was involved in
what would normally be sort of business activity i was managing people i was responsible for a budget i was planning and i just loved it i felt so i felt so engaged in this process of both practicing being the monastic practice and and an activity
the that gave me a lot of energy so there was also a both a both seem like the most incredibly on foreign thing to do and also had some real appeal and of course i've had i've had many would i think of as i should have stayed at zen center days
or i should have gone to medical school days
because it's in many ways it's it's been really both i feel like each day my work in in business my world feels turned upside down and i feel turned upside down
theres a
a famous quote by dogan where he says
when the dharma does not fill your whole body and mind you think it has already sufficient when the dharma fills your body and mind you understand that something is missing
again this this quote show like this this is a quote that comes up for me into this this com this sense about something's missing why why doesn't the buffalo go all the way through why is there that was there that tail what is it that's missing
there's no limit to our understanding and at the same time i feel like there's no limit to our confusion if we think we've gotten to a place where we have complete understanding this is duggan's the dharma does not fill your whole body and mind
what's missing
the whole buffalo passes through the window had horns and four legs why can't the tail pass through
our job and practice
i think it's to remain open usually when we hear something
we're comparing it to our own ideas we hear something and it either agrees with our worldview and we accept it or it doesn't agree and we rejected the buffalo passing through the window except for the tail to me means to be open to be open to what we don't expect we
expect it would make sense that the buffalo would pass through the window that it would go through completely
how could it how could it go through completely except for the tail
what's what's there to learn here what's there to learn about our lives
one of the questions that that i've been turning is this question and i don't know i don't know where this question comes from
but it's this question that says what is the impossible request that this life asks of me
i believe that we all we all have some unique gift some unique mission
that it's no accident that we're here that were alive that we're in this place at this time
come in the form of a amazingly in the form of a human being
at the mountain the recent times mountain seat ceremony i i asked paul hellyer this question during the ceremony and i i thought his his answer really touched me paul's answer to this question was
to keep an open heart to be open to our own and others' pain and suffering and also to be open to joy
how could it be that this tale doesn't pass through
why is it so difficult
to really love ourselves and to accept ourselves
and to accept ourselves and others as buddha
why is it that were so easily fooled by our own stories why are we fooled by this story about the tail not passing through
being open also means being open to the truth of our own pain and difficulty
so often
we want to hide from our pain from our shame embarrassment and suffering
yet the more we look away the more we become entangled in our own stories pain failure and disappointment
tend to turn us upside down
and that turning upside down changes the way we look at the world and can open us help us see things be fresh yet it's hard to turn towards towards that paying towards that tell not passing all the way through
i was thinking about a m
i was telling food last week the story on the path after last week's lecture about a conversation they had with my son
thirty great

my son jason is twenty years old
we were standing in the kitchen and one day he said
he said look at you dead
your old
you're short for you're balding
you're starting the limp your teeth are crooked you're you're not very smart and you're not wealthy and i felt so proud of him
eight hundred different
he also said
just to complete his thought process
he's young he said he he he didn't want to be anything like me
and i
i know cause he he looked at me and said you know you haven't you have a job and you have a house and you have children you have like office responsibilities like why would anyone want to do that but pen and on
i could only stand there and kind of nod

but i felt so foundry i felt so loving and connected and so glad that time and we've had we effect on
we had a and i had a wonderful we have he's working in my warehouse this summer and
i'd like i sat down for lunch with him in a chinese restaurant and he looked up at me and said do you think of yourself as confident as having confidence
and i thought that was a great question i also think i also think it's a lot like this car
and my my question to that i asked i answered his question with a question they said what do you mean by confidence what is what his confidence and he said well you know you know he said his as i don't i don't really and
he said you know you're giving this lecture tomorrow night at green gulch you said you know
this is i usually think of confident people has give me the and like he's like i'm confused as it is it because you're my dad that i don't see you as confident and your site have you know you're going to teach all of these people some
thing but you know like what have you ever taught me
the brutal i know
again it's that you know
i it's that darn tail know i i i said you know i feel like
i've really tried my best with you know to talk to teach you that i hope that i've taught you know through what i do and who i am and and that i don't really believe so much and like you can to do you want me do you want us to set up lecture time
i somehow never thought that would be
all that useful but is there know is there's something
is there's something that you want from me and and he said he would think about it
so i am

when when he in some way when he asked me that that question with my son asked me this question about why did i do these things that i do what can i thought well what what's the alternative mean what is what we all there's no there's no avoiding responsibility really you can write you can you
can avoid the responsibility you can
you cannot have children are you cannot have you our house and that's fine you know but you cannot avoid
being responsible and being in a way this cohen's talking about our is our responsibility as practitioners is the responsibility of seeing clearly and the responsibility of helping give comfort to other people and and there's so many and there's so many ways that we can choose to there's deck that can take many many for
forms and there's no this idea i think that he has as a twenty year old that he can somehow it's a wonderful idea that you can somehow avoid all responsibility rates busy it's eternal child and it's wonderful because i also and when yes we better i realized i know i don't i said i don't feel the responses
for you and so it's like you you think that you know i've never i've never done any i've never i don't feel like i've ever sacrifice you know i i don't do i'm not working to make money to support him because he has like i don't think he thinks that i think that where he thinks that i'm working some job because i feel
feel responsible i said i've always just done what i want and i like what i do i'd like you know i like my life and and i'm
at the same time i'm still trying to figure out what i'm gonna do when i grow up but i said you know you should not count on need to be responsible for you because i don't because i don't if you know it's time for you to be responsible for for you
but i felt as he was i loved his questions that i loved the spirit and i felt like in a way his questions were a lot like my questions which is what is responsibility what is freedom
how is it that our own ideas get in the way
and what does it mean to act freely to act effectively and to act to act beyond these ideas of success and failure
in some way there's some this coin is about failure it's about
or failure in terms of not something turning us upside down something not meeting our expectations the buffalo doesn't go all the way through the window
i was thinking of a crime
i'm i'm part of a group called social venture network which is a group of business leaders from around the country
this is a this is a group of mostly it very very successful business pupils of course i i didn't feel like i fit into this group you know and was there is a meeting
this was a couple of years ago this was in a room of about three hundred people who are running companies but are are trying to combine running companies with social responsibility and this was a meeting that was being hosted by rom das who was really speaking from his heart and
really kind of got got people to a very very kind of open place and people in this room
each person started talking he would hand go around give person microphone and the first person started saying how how much they felt that they didn't belong in this group that they felt like an outsider and the microphone web around and every person started expressing how much they felt
that they didn't fit that they that they had that everyone had this image of that everybody else was a successful business person and that they all didn't fit and in a way it was this wonderful almost this kind of group
crying and acknowledgement of that all of us felt like misfits and all of us felt like failures and and that that with some this kind of wonder if provided this wonderful opening to get to really get down to turn upside down and to provided it set the whole tone for the weekend so that
there is real
no real human meeting and we were able to you know the the conversation and the dialogue was not you know about business stuff it was about it was about human beings and about real real meeting in real suffering

yeah i thought that term since
in fact i i i intended to
i was going to come here for for dinner tonight but i was i was involved in this project at work of i've tried to find
quotes about spiritual humor and and that kind of get into it so i i ended up staying a little bit too long to make it here for dinner but i was thinking of a how much am i think
i think that laughter and comedy is such an important part of spiritual practice that often
we miss for that i think i think i think we could all use moreover i think there could be more of it here at zen center and in everywhere for spiritual practitioners i was thinking of
when of things i was thinking of those sitting and writing i was thinking about know she can taza just sitting and i was thinking about somehow some connection between just sitting and stand up comedy
and i thought well maybe there should be a school of zen called sit down comedy
something something about something that combines humor
and and wisdom and a lot of the a lot of the kind of quotes that brushed and tries and we try and do that but it's so hard for any of us to really be funny
i don't know i don't know quite what it is
but one of the one of the one of my favorite quotes that we've published on a on a card is a is a quote from
to teresa of avila who has a and i think eleventh century i'm christian mystic and she said
i know the universe won't give me more than i can handle i only wish it didn't trust me so much mexicans
i think
i think i'm going to end with her with a poem
hafiz because been studying our fees at all
you probably mostly no benefits are left i think some huh
theresa villiers eleventh century i think i think i fees is twelve or thirteen thirteenth century right one hundred one hundred years before revealing portraits
a long time ago
but i thought this as i was looking through phases poetry i thought this one was on went really well with this column and it's called
someone should start laughing
i have a thousand brilliant lies for the question how are you
i have a thousand brilliant lives for the question what is god
this can be known from words if you think that the sun and the ocean can pass through this opening called the mouth oh someone should start laughing
some which has start wildly laughing now
some it's really just a phenomenal pleasure for me to run and
it's such a gift for me to be here with all of you and and i was some fool has been inviting me to come spend more time here lights checking out the schedule in the time and i'd love to start coming in sitting with you all in the mornings when i can there's a few minutes i get i know that it's
kind of close to bedtime here but
it's getting dark
and program but if there's if there's something anything that anyone wants to say or ask her to this components

a horse barn
how hours your learning
the it was real estate for the record but i was admiring the rows of potatoes i'm up there ain't one of the one of the most i'm fun and exhilarating things we did with the horses was a harvest potatoes with horses with
two horses and they on the machine was it was like a a blade is real simple machines holding two handles about chess time which went down to a a big rounded blade and then there is a wheel that turned behind the play say line go up
the line the horses so they're straddling the row that and the idea is to walk slowly and street
that when i ask so that's blade if you're when you when you are doing for the moments when that's happening
you're up to the blade is going
it was
we learned a tremendous amount we had a a man named harold heart who was this
he grew up he was driving teams of horses since he was seven years old in kansas and he he ran the stables up
a biome let's name in a town just south of is only yeah
some of the large lima lima right there's a that there's a ranch in lima that harold heart was our mentor and like when we couldn't get a horse to load to load on a on
upon one of the trucks harold would come down and he he used the to buy for method of
when it was not the zen center means you could say you guys are two general with these creatures and other people
i'm the first step
it was a lot of things were wonderful about it
but it was hard it was hard to be a horse farmer and be practicing here
because the schedule and we were i would we're usually up you know as earlier earlier than the harm and were and down getting the horses and preparing the horses for the day so it's really hard to follow the schedule and so there is some real questioning about being farmers actually being farmers and following the schedule
and there's also this real i think though the learning curve was very very steep
there was this realization that this was a three generation commitment but farm with that that that i felt like i needed to spend the rest of my life don't you know being committed to doing this horse farming and the zen center needed to be
committed to that for over generations and that and item it just wasn't that you know when we really faced we really faced that we faced the truth of that and
mike my commitment wasn't there and he's like it was like i wanted to go back to tassajara
and i loved it but and you know and i was to felt totally devoted to it but
i think combination of seeing the level of that commitment and there is
it costs him a real conflict within the community and and
you know i got tapped on the children one day and went down tatar and spent the next several years working in the toss in kitchens and
and the horses soon result after
i heard that was further to die on the standards of you do with them
true i never heard that story i mean there were there are lots of sub stories i mean one i mean one of them was that mean this again this was during the this was during the richard baker the days of bigger issue days and and in part there is also there's a little bit of this feeling that bit green gulch was supposed to be a a model
you know and that and that in a way the horses and and what we were doing was a part of it was to raise funds and part of it was so there are there are multiple know multiple agendas going on and i felt i thought it was a very sincere and wonderful attempt but again it it just was i think
the the infrastructure and commitments just weren't there it's really really pull it off and then again it was there were horses and were breeding horses there were cows and we're breeding cows and there were chickens and we were no a one point someone calculated we were growing the most expensive eggs in the world
you if you were to actually costs less you are going to go into labor costs a dollar and aim
how those potatoes were probably a dollar a potato
after the so it was so
in a in of inefficient and we're so over our heads hasn't been ways
yes martin weir when we didn't think you're also work with the plans to be yet he also talked about the person and how might taken on new actually pm that getting the when you run your am
steve sticky yes was my close some clothes mentor i'm magnetic your name nick had nick handed the baton to me and left
desperate for them coupon
yeah it was not me and peter rudnick were partners in crime it though we were both that was our that was our job for the three year period

i was always some mick mick often reminds me that i forget you know that we're in the same bred lineage
because we should catch up with smartphone you had a big cats are
gave you the talking to
the it was a but
that's very crusty
and then if what's great is that mic now in a mic as much much better more sophisticated baker than i ever was there will be so one wonderful to that the way traditions are passed on
thank you all very much
new hampshire and make a