Welcome, everyone, both everyone in this zendo and all of you who are joining in your own homes or other places. For those who don't know me, my name is Tova Green. I'm a resident priest at City Center, and I am very happy to and honored to be giving this talk tonight. It's the first Dharma talk we've had in the Zendo, and also the first talk of the new year. So there's something about the energy of new beginnings tonight. And I would say we're still in a transition The last talk in the Buddha Hall was given by Abbot David on the topic of transitions. And since that time, many of us have moved from those of us who lived in this building, have moved up the street.

[01:23]

Many people have moved their offices. We no longer have a kitchen, so we're not eating our meals together. And there have been many changes for those of us living in this community. So I think it's still a time of transition, getting used to new patterns and new places, and finding ways of creating community when we don't eat our meals together and see each other in those informal ways that we... I think I took for granted, but I miss them. I want to thank a number of people. First, our Tanto, Timothy Wicks, for inviting me to give the talk, Timothy and the practice committee.

[02:26]

I want to thank my own teacher, Agent Linda Cutts, for her support over many years. I want to thank all of you who are here tonight for coming out and bringing your presence and also for those who are participating on Zoom. And I want to thank everyone who made this possible, this move. It took a great deal of planning. And I particularly want to thank Dan Gudgel, who has been leading the online Zendo, who spent hours trying to figure out how to live stream from this room and install cameras and these speakers so everyone can hear.

[03:29]

There are too many people to name, but it's pretty miraculous that we've been able to make this shift, I think, fairly gracefully. We're figuring out how to do things in the zendo, creating a Kaisando and Ancestors Hall on the back of the altar so we could honor Suzuki Roshi. Today is the third. We always have a ceremony, the evening of the third and the morning of the fourth. We're still figuring things out. So it's kind of on the one hand exciting, on the other hand sometimes challenging to get used to so many things that have changed. But also I want to say because it's the new year and there's often a feeling at the beginning of the year

[04:30]

of hope, of expectation, maybe some new wishing to set intentions for the new year. And I thought tonight a good theme might be talking about vow. A vow is a little stronger than an intention. I will give a definition of vow, but many people think about the new year and things they might want to change or introduce into your life, your practice. And it's an opportunity to kind of think about what might happen be missing in your life what might be enhanced in your life what is nourishing what brings joy and to see how to bring more of those things into our lives at the same time you know right now the world is a challenging place to live in and how do we also

[05:57]

meet that and find ways to bring our practice into the world. There's a way of expressing the bodhisattva vow that I want to explore tonight, and that's to live and be lived for the benefit of all beings. I really love that expression of the bodhisattva vow. And so I'm going to talk about that, but before I'm embarking on that subject, I want to dedicate my talk tonight to the well-being of one of my mentors and dear friends, Alan Sanaki. Many of you may know Alan. the Abbott of Berkeley Zen Center, and for over a week he has been in the ICU at Kaiser in Oakland.

[07:08]

He had some complications after a surgery and then had a heart attack while in the hospital, so he's been in critical condition. And Alan, I met Alan when I first moved to the Bay Area in 1990 and became involved in the Buddhist Peace Fellowship, partly through meeting Alan at a Buddhist Peace Fellowship conference. And there was something about him that was so upright and warm. And I found out he was practicing at Berkeley Zen Center. And I had previously been before moving to the Bay Area, mostly going to Vipassana retreats. I lived in Boston, and I went to the Insight Meditation Center in Barry. And I was looking for a place to practice here. And it was a combination of meeting Alan and starting to sit in the mornings at Berklee Zen Center and also going to Green Gulch Farm on Sundays.

[08:23]

That... helped me embark on my Zen journey. And I later worked with Alan at the Buddhist Peace Fellowship and got to know him and his family. So he's very much on my mind these days. Let's see. So talking about... I'm drawing from two texts that I really appreciated, Living by Vow by Shohaku Okamura, and a newer book called The Vow-Powered Life by Jan Shosen Bayes, who's a Zen teacher in Oregon.

[09:24]

And I'll start with Chosen Bey's description of vow. Just to say, the monastery where Chosen and her husband, Hogan Bey, teach in Oregon is called Great Vow Monastery. And they named the monastery after Jizo Bodhisattva. because Jizo Bodhisattva, who's a protector of children and travelers, usually depicted very simply as a monk, Jizo had made a vow to save all beings, to go into the hell realms, to help people who were suffering after their death. And so Jizo's great vow, is what led to Chozen and Hogan naming their Monastery Great Vow.

[10:30]

Chozen says, when you begin to look at life through the lens of vows, you are touched by the dedication of human beings to not only form an aspiration to grow, and overcome obstacles, but also by their unselfish effort to dedicate themselves to a larger beneficial purpose, even to an end they will not live to see manifest. So the vow, it's a commitment to, well, the bodhisattva vow, to live and be lived for the benefit of all beings, to dedicate our lives to support others, to serve others, to help others, and not forgetting ourselves.

[11:44]

But it's a very... strong commitment. And I think when we study the precepts and receive the precepts in a jukai ceremony and begin to really live our lives in that ethical way, we also are committing to the bodhisattva vows. The vow-powered life is a life that, I mean, there are vows of all kinds. They're not only the bodhisattva vow, but the vow to live and be lived for all beings

[12:53]

is a vow that comes from a very deep place and can be a place we can find in our zazen practice where we realize that we're not separate from all beings, that our lives are intertwined and that we want to care about our fellow beings. And that includes trees, rivers, the earth that we live on. One expression of this vow is a very old expression. It's a shantideva vow. was an eighth-century mystic, lived in India, wrote a book called The Way of the Bodhisattva.

[14:04]

And I love this expression of the bodhisattva vow, which I'm going to read to you. May I become doctor and medicine. May I be the nurse for all sick beings in the world. until everyone is healed. And during the ages of scarcity, may I change into food and drink. May I become an inexhaustible treasure for those who are poor and destitute. May I be a protector of those without one, a guide for all travelers on the way. May I be a bridge, a boat, and a ship for all who wish to cross the waters, a bed for those who wish to rest, and a servant to those in need. So that may sound like perhaps an impossible vow, but I think the bodhisattva vows that we chant at the end of service every day,

[15:18]

all impossible, the four. Beings are numberless. I vow to save them, which is another version of living and being lived for the benefit of all beings. Beings are... Delusions are inexhaustible. I vow to end them. Dharma gates are boundless. I vow to enter them. And Buddha's way is unsurpassable. I vow to become it. How do we do those things? And I think the invitation is to aspire to, to try to do those things, to be open, to recognizing our, well, our interconnectedness, but also then Dharma gates are boundless to see each opportunity, each person we encounter as someone we can learn with, learn from, that anything can be a Dharma gate.

[16:49]

any difficulty we may encounter can be a Dharma gate. And the impossibility of the vow can be encouraging rather than overwhelming. And One of the things that Shohaku Okamura talks about in Living by Vow is thinking of sangha as vow. And I think currently for those of us who are part of this Zen Center Sangha, which I think is everyone online as well as here, how to

[17:59]

connect as sangha. Especially, I think, for those of us who are residents and have been used to seeing each other informally as well as formally, I think this time of transition is one in which we're going to be finding new ways of connecting with each other. Certainly in the zendo, so I think we're really fortunate to still have the zendo during this year and to find different ways of being together not only through zazen and Dharma talks and classes and practice period, but find ways of meeting each other for lunch, taking a walk, finding ways we can support one another during this time.

[19:25]

So in terms of Sangha as Val, Shohaku Okamura talks about Dogen Zenji, who... discusses the inner attitude we should maintain when we vow to create a sangha or a practice place. When we make a vow to found a temple, a sangha or a monastery, we should not be motivated by human sentiment, but we should strengthen our aspiration for the continuous practice of Buddha Dharma. Our vow... It's interesting because I think what he's talking about is that the vow is to devote ourselves to practice and that that is what creates the sangha.

[20:49]

Although I think it's also true that things we see as good, useful, and beneficial, I think the idea is... not just thinking of what's good and beneficial for ourselves as individuals, but what is good and beneficial for one another, for the community, and finding ways to care for one another. That practice isn't only for our own well-being and benefit, And quoting Dogen, if each person seeks his or her own happiness and holds his or her own views, opinions, values, and ways of thinking, then there will be conflict. If we practice with other people on the basis of human sentiment, it may work for a while, but eventually it will fail.

[21:56]

So our practice should be based not on human sentiment. but on an aspiration for the continuous practice of Buddha Dharma. I think that we learn and practice how to live with one another when conflict arises. And I think that, again, that ability to... Be curious when you disagree with someone to listen, to be open to another perspective and not hold rigidly to one's own. I think that also comes from or can be strengthened by creating a sense of spaciousness through our meditation practice. Also wanted to bring up tonight something about the importance of our actions.

[23:16]

I think partly because of visiting Alan and spending some time with members of his family in the waiting room near the ICU. I've been thinking about the five remembrances. This is an old teaching of the Buddha and a translation by Thich Nhat Hanh, particularly the fourth and fifth remembrances. So the five remembrances are, I am of the nature to grow old. There's no way to escape growing old. I am of the nature to have ill health. There's no way to escape ill health. I am of the nature to die. There's no way to escape death. And all that is dear to me and everyone I love are of the nature to change.

[24:22]

There is no way to escape being separated from them. And lastly, my actions are my only true belongings. I cannot escape the consequences of my actions. My actions are the ground upon which I stand. And I think we're remembered for our actions. So living by vows, sometimes it's contrasted to living by karma, living by our aspirations, and also understanding that through our actions, we can create more positive karma for ourselves and others.

[25:30]

I would also like to talk about how living and being lived for the benefit of all beings, how I've seen... some of those acts of generosity in Alan and in other teachers and mentors. I thought I would like to just share a couple of of things that I have appreciated about Alan over the years.

[26:54]

There was one time when his children were young, and they've been residents at Berkley Zen Center for a very long time. Alan, his wife, Lori, and they have a daughter named Sylvie, who's older, and then their son, Alex, is a couple of years younger than Sylvie. And as the children were growing older, they were sharing a room. And Sylvie got to be an age where she really wanted her own room. And Alan vacated his study so Sylvie could have her own room. That always impressed me. So thoughtful and generous. And then in his work at the Buddhist... Peace Fellowship. He was someone who networked widely. He was involved in an international network of engaged Buddhists, traveled a lot, was very concerned about the situation for Buddhists in Burma when Aung San Suu Kyi was

[28:15]

leading Burma and made several trips to Burma. He started an organization called Clearview, which supports some of the Burmese refugees living in Thailand. He also has... had in recent years been teaching Buddhists in India, many of whom had been students of someone named Iyengar who died. Most of the students he was teaching in India were from the Dalit class, which used to be called untouchables. And just really supported looking for ways he could be of assistance.

[29:16]

He was also a musician, a writer, and wonderful photographer. So Alan was, I caught myself saying was, he still is. and hopefully will continue to be of benefit to many people in the world. But I see him as someone who has practiced that bodhisattva vow deeply, I would like to end with a song. It's around. I'm not going to teach it to you or ask you to sing it, but I just thought it was relevant to this topic.

[30:24]

And then we'll have a little bit of time for comments, questions, if you have any. Building bridges between our divisions, I reach out to you, will you reach out to me? With all of our voices and all of our visions, friends, we could make such sweet harmony. So I... I think building bridges between our divisions and working to harmonize with one another is another way of manifesting the bodhisattva vow. So thank you for your attention. And I'm wondering if anyone would like to ask a question or make a comment.

[31:31]

Is that Timothy? Topa, thank you for doing this first talk and bravely sitting up there and giving a wonderful talk to start us out in this new exciting chapter that the next year will be for us. I'm wondering if you have any ideas about, I realize it's early on right now, about how it is that we might spend a little bit more time together? You say that you've really taken for granted how it is that we came across each other before. Do you have any ideas about how it is that we might be inspired to spend more time together right now? Well, I know some of us are trying to eat lunch together at the conference center, 12.30 and... And I don't think that idea has really caught on yet very widely.

[32:53]

But that's one opportunity where we just bring our lunches there. I know people have talked about occasionally having Friday night potlucks in the conference center or pizza nights. I hope we will do no talent shows, skid nights. I think that's... a way we often come together. Inviting each other to take walks or, you know, share food. What are some other ways? I think the coming practice period will be a good... I'm looking forward to it, Mako. Mako's leading this next practice period. Because it always... When we have a practice period, I feel it energizes the whole sangha. We're studying the same thing. We have small groups.

[33:56]

So I think that's something, and it's also a way the wider sangha can join us. Those are some of my thoughts. Thanks for the question. Catherine. I love so much everyone from the world. I love so much everyone who comes here to practice. From their jobs, driving, getting at parking somewhere. I know you're here. Thank you so much. And I feel concern in me about we and how small it can be and building a bridge that is actually already here and walking on it.

[34:59]

I am puzzled sometimes because... Hello, everyone. Because I feel it here. And there's still a how in it. You know, to really kind of taste that how is where, for me, the bridge-making is feeling important. And do you have anything to say about that? I agree. It's very important. And, you know, it was really... very encouraging, wonderful with our wider sangha when we were getting ready for this move. So many people came and helped, helped pack things up and really supported this residential sangha.

[36:06]

And I don't know if there are any work projects we can do together during this time or other ways we can, you know, be together within this space. But I do think that's important. And the affinity groups are still meeting, which is another way people can come together, some of them in person, some of them online. Do you have some ideas yourself? No, I'm kind of pressing a little bit on... on language and identity and we. And I'm curious about the space of here, and I'm curious about, you know, so I'm wanting, I'm feeling like I want a space a little bigger.

[37:06]

And I don't know how to say it. That's what's in my question. I think the bigger becomes the fuller. I don't know. They're not separate. But thank you for asking me that because that was my response and it's a question. It's like a live question for me. Yeah. Thank you. Victoria. Yeah, so you're a compassion mountain, and Hozon is a Dharma mountain. And so I'd like to work with Catherine's question in a slightly different way, because for me, mountain relates to Jizo or earth store bodhisattva, which your talk is strongly bringing up for me, that desire to...

[38:11]

as long as there's beings in the world to bridge those gaps and to manifest vow together. And one of the things that's interesting to me about this time in San Francisco Zen Center's history is that we have the opportunity to bridge the gap between residents and non-residents in our Sangha, something which Hozan and you actually so strongly I mean, all your work in socially engaged Buddhism and all your work as a social worker and working at Laguna Honda and, you know, kind of standing for the things that you've stood for, helping the people you've helped. Like I remember one of the first things, first times I remember meeting you, you were acting as a representative for I can't remember what Eastern European country it was, but the women were making socks.

[39:18]

Yeah, former Yugoslavia. Yeah. Yes. And so, you know, to me it just seems like hosan witnesses and you support. And there's these qualities that come forth. that we can express in new ways. So I'm wondering about how that might manifest. I mean, all the work we've done in socially engaged Buddhism, this is a social engagement. This is an opportunity for social engagement. So what is it? Anyway, it's more of a question for me. I don't have an answer for it, but I kind of have faith. And I wonder if that, you know, this tool has been held up in a different way of inclusion.

[40:21]

How you would continue to turn this question. I... we have an opportunity during this time to do more outreach. I'm very happy that Ellen is going to be taking on the role of outreach coordinator and that maybe more of us can be involved in some of the work that Jeffrey started and that she's doing both with Unhoused And, you know, we used to, many of us used to do prison ministry, going to prisons. And we haven't been doing that, I think, since COVID.

[41:24]

There are many things. So that's one way. I don't know. I do feel it's important for us to be more engaged with our neighborhood and city and interfaith groups. I hope that we may have the energy to do that, the time and energy. I think there's more connection with Sokoji. Our community is so I want to say, a rich and varied, and there's so many ways we could bring our practice with us outside these walls, and maybe we'll have more possibilities of that this year.

[42:31]

I don't know that I would like to see that. Yeah, thank you. I think it's about a little bit over time. Are there any other comments or questions? Yes, is it? hear me, so if you could just tell them we're having some audio trouble. Okay, for whoever is trying to ask a question online, we're having some audio trouble. Maybe could they put it in the text? Perhaps it's time to say goodnight.

[44:00]

There are no other comments or questions. Oh, Hayko, question over here. Thank you, Dover, for your talk and for holding the fire of community and helping us work to build it. It seems to me that we're all put out Right now, we're all sort of put out of our usual space, and we all have a really, as you said, a strong practice of reaching out wherever we are in this temple to meet and greet, support, and learn from each other. Now, right now, I feel it too, is that that interaction's gonna continue to want to happen to keep us healthy. in the normal help that we have. And so, as we're all put out, it seems that we can just continue to reach out and find other places outside of this temple, if that makes sense.

[45:14]

And I'm not saying it the way I thought about it, but my point is, would you advise us to pick up our practice and take it to the street now in ways, and in what ways would we do that so that we don't lose the, you know, not just meeting with each other, but so that we don't lose that day-to-day reaching out to help others that we have. What can we do since we are put out and we're not, like, forced to, by our company, reach out to each other? I'm not sure what you mean by we're put out. Well, we're actually, literally, I'm now living elsewhere and seeing so few people. We're having a nice time in our little community of five. And I'm thinking, well, maybe that's not enough and maybe we need to do something or have a vow of doing something daily that isn't our usual practice.

[46:16]

Yeah. Yeah, I think that will evolve. I think starting to get to know the community of five and feel connected in our new living spaces is an important place to start, and I think then we will have energy to go out and maybe help each other with that question, what can we do? What would be of use? And also, how can we be... Even in the sendo, invite more people in to share the practice with us and bring more voices. Thank you. It seems like we need to watch out for that. Keep it up. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you very much, everybody.

[47:13]

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