Good to be with you all again. I just want to make sure that you can all hear me. So maybe raise your thumb if you're able to hear me. So just so I can be sure that there's no problem. All right. Awesome. Thank you very much. It's always a joy to be with you. I really look forward to these evenings together or wherever you might be. It may not be evening your time. It may be morning. But anyhow, it's a joy to practice together with you in this way. And again, the usual format, if you're new to this, is that we'll spend about 25 minutes in Zazen or assignment meditation. And then I'll offer a few encouraging words following. And we'll do that for about 15 minutes or so. And then after that, we'll open up for all of you to share if you have any questions or want to... talk about what's coming up for you in your practice at this time, basically just open name for all of you to bring forward whatever you'd like to bring forward.

[01:08]

So I mentioned recently how many of us have been feeling at this point of the pandemic that we're kind of tired of this whole thing and ready for it to be over with. I've heard a number of people say that they're really experiencing a fatigue, kind of from all the ongoing discomfort and duress and inconvenience and even grief that comes with this particular time with sheltering in place, with social or physical distancing, worrying about and caring for the wellbeing of ourselves and loved ones, and maybe even caring for someone who is sick and dying from COVID-19. So at this point, most of us have made a significant effort to attend to the various health and safety protocols that are being asked of us. I know at Zen Center, we've made a huge effort to try to put everything into place in order to support a residential congregate community.

[02:14]

And we've been very fortunate so far that no one has gotten sick. But maintaining these efforts can require a lot of persistent attention and energy and resolve. And like any exertion that's extended over a long period of time, we can begin to feel tired, depleted, especially if staying dedicated to the particular cause that we're giving energy to has its own kind of negative and challenging impacts. It's not actually so easy to be doing what we're doing at this time. And maybe as a result, our commitment to our initial intention can begin to weaken and wane. And we might find ourselves becoming unfocused and less disciplined in our efforts, perhaps feeling a bit lazy and tending to slack off in what we were originally committed to doing, and maybe even feeling somewhat resentful regarding having to make the effort in the first place.

[03:21]

And I think this is just part of the reason for the protest that we've seen recently. against the shelter-in-place orders, that despite the negative impact of not continuing to heed these orders and how it is that doing so actually curtails the virus and saves lives, that many people may just be feeling this is enough, I really can't bear this, and I don't want to inconvenience myself to the degree or make the effort to the degree that I need to. So maintaining this effort wholeheartedly is becoming much more challenging and in many cases not so comfortable for some folks. For others, maybe it's not so much of a challenge. Maybe it's more like doing an extended meditation retreat and we're actually kind of tipping into enjoying it. So we just need to recognize where are we in this particular kind of time and period of effort in meeting the pandemic.

[04:25]

So how do we reinvigorate our efforts and our practice whenever we begin to notice that somehow it's waning, that it's beginning to happen, that everything that we're doing, for example, to sustain healthy protocols amidst the pandemic, or even just our daily meditation and mindfulness practice, how that effort is beginning to somehow weaken. How do we maintain an effort, particularly over an extended period of time without becoming burnt out in some way or resentful or simply giving up altogether? So this is some of the things that I'd like to explore with you today, particularly in the Dharmat that's gonna follow our meditation. But let's first settle into actually doing some Zazen together. So I encourage you to, as usual, Take an upright, attentive posture, whatever supports you to be comfortable, relaxed, and yet fully present for your body for the next 25 minutes or so.

[05:40]

And I'm going to ring the bell. And as I do so, bring your awareness to the sound of the bell. And noticing again, when it first arises, noticing its duration. And at the end, what is it? When the sound fades away, what is it that remains? And I'll be offering a few guided words at the beginning of the meditation, and then we'll eventually fade into silence altogether. to become aware of and connect with and open to the present moments.

[07:03]

Allow yourself to simply relax into this moment, however it's manifesting. And this might require initially gathering our attention from wherever it's been and allowing it to abide right here in the direct experience of this present moment. So letting your bodily presence be the ground or the foundation of your experience of the present moment. Coming back to the body, going out of our heads, out of our minds, into the embodied experience of being right here. And seeing if we can settle into this embodied experience right here.

[08:09]

Recognizing whatever might be happening for the body. All that can be welcomed. acknowledged, included, a sense of welcoming it with openness. If it's helpful, you might wish to use the breath, either the sensation or the sound of the breath, as a touchstone. So allowing awareness to gently accompany that natural rhythm of breathing in and breathing out. Allowing the spotlight and mind's attention to focus on the sensations of the breath.

[09:19]

Breathing in, being aware of the in-breath. Breathing out, being aware of the out-breath. Perhaps just being aware of the sound of breathing. Or another point in the body that helps you to maintain a sense of contact, direct experience of the present moment. Something that you can keep coming back to if you need throughout the meditation as a touchstone. as we make an effort to try to maintain contact of connection with the present moments, whether or not we're using an object for a meditation.

[10:36]

Simply notice if and when the mind wanders for whatever reason, maybe it's distracted by a fault, a particular sensation or tension or pain in the body, maybe a particular emotional state. Simply noticing that this has happened. It's okay. This is what happens. Part of being human. So whenever we notice it, the noticing itself is what's most important. It's the moment of waking up. Waking up to see what's happening now. It's a moment of We can choose in that moment of waking up to decide where we want to direct our intention and our attention. Be grounded in the present moments.

[11:39]

Perhaps returning it once again to the breath, in a particular place in the body. Very simple. open awareness, becoming aware of awareness itself. What we're cultivating is this willingness to come back, to make the effort again and again, to come back to whatever it is that we're experiencing and feeling right now. There's nothing wrong with what we're experiencing. It's simply what is being experienced. In time we discover that the Buddha mind is wide enough, vast enough, boundless enough to be able to include all experience without preference.

[12:45]

practicing this way, we come to have a fundamental trust in the Buddha mind, in our natural state of open awareness, trusting ourselves to be able to experience the experience that we're experiencing, to allow it to make itself known, reverberate through us in whatever way it does. Letting it pass without grabbing onto it or identifying it. And then noticing that it too, like all phenomenon, all experience in time fades away. And something else comes forward to make itself known.

[13:56]

So the diligent effort is coming back again and again. Once, twice, a hundred, a thousand times. Whatever's needed to stay here in the immediate field of our experience without getting lost in stories about past and future. able to do this, we begin to get a taste of our natural freedom. It's always available for us, always waiting for us to return to it whenever we stray. Continue

[15:06]

Resting now in awareness and silence are the remainder of meditation. Thank you everyone for joining together again in Zazen.

[30:12]

So now I'll transition into the Dharmet. And in the last session, I spoke briefly on the Buddhist practice of patience. Patience or Kashanti is the third of the six perfections or paramitas. And the paramitas, if you're not familiar with them, are particular virtues that are to be cultivated in order to strengthen our practice and to bring one to enlightenment. So these six perfections or virtues are generosity, ethical behavior, patience, joyful or diligent effort, concentration, or sometimes called meditation, and wisdom. So... Today, what I'd like to do is say a few things about the fourth perfection, which is Virya Paramita. And Virya Paramita is generally translated as the perfection of energy or the perfection of zeal or the perfection of enthusiastic effort.

[31:20]

And it also connotes diligent, courageous, or heroic effort. And as such, it's kind of the opposite of sloth or defeatism. And I think... during this pandemic period of great duress that, in fact, may continue for yet some time. We actually don't know how long it's continued, despite some of the estimates that we've been given, that it's actually important to be able to cultivate viria, to cultivate a resolute and enthusiastic effort in order to continue to diligently care for each other, for ourselves, and for our overall Zen practice. A full range of translations of the Sanskrit word virya include effort, energy, enthusiasm, diligence, exertion, perseverance, zeal, zest, joyous effort, joyous energy, joyful perseverance, vitality,

[32:30]

rising forward and moving, uprising energy. So in other words, virya is the rising energy and forward movement of being with what's difficult and then moving forward from there. So all these words kind of circle around the meaning of this particular perfection or paramita. And at the beginning, if those of you who are familiar with the living kindness meditation, at the beginning of the metasutta, it says, let one be strenuous, upright, and sincere. And the word strenuous in that phrase is the same kind of feeling that Derya has, something that can be single-mindedly maintained over a long period, a long time, or maybe even forever. And not just maintain, but maintain with a sense of enthusiasm and even joy. So in other words, even in the face of difficulty, we can maintain a dedicated, diligent effort.

[33:37]

So virya, like the perfections of patience and samadhi, actually builds with practice. And I think that the fundamental energy that propels... The virya of a bodhisattva or an awakened being who's dedicated to serving others to be liberated is actually that of love. The word virya derives from the Aryan Indian culture with its warrior roots. So it expresses the power, the morality, strength, exertion, and courage of a warrior. and it comes from an ancient Indian-Iranian word that means hero. And it's also the root of the English word virile, and therefore carries with it a masculine connotation. Virile can refer to both the mental and physical energy, so applying the full capacity of our bodies and minds and making a heroic warrior-like effort.

[34:45]

And ultimately, Virya Paramita is about making a courageous, heroic, and consistent effort to realize enlightenment. Total liberation, not just for ourselves, but once again, the bodhisattva vow, liberation from suffering for all beings. So, virya is in the service of sustaining our practice efforts. And the Buddha said, monks, If you make diligent effort, nothing is difficult. For this reason, you should practice diligence. It is like the ability of a continuous trickle of water to bore a hole into a rock. And if you remember from last week, this was a similar metaphor that was used for patience, the paramita of patience. If the mind of a practitioner often becomes lazy and slacks off from practice, It is like when a person is making a fire by throwing a wooden stick and then stops before it becomes hot, right?

[35:53]

Stops before the fire begins. Although the person wishes to make a fire, that's their intention, it's not possible, right? And this is called diligent effort. Continue to making the effort in order to bring forth the fire, the intention itself. So This speaks to the, again, like Kashanti, diligent effort is a matter of constancy, of continuous efforts and practice. And this is the bodhisattva effort of continuous practice, of knowing when and where to direct our energy at any particular time. In other words, we can make diligent effort to water what we might say in practice are the wholesome seeds of mindfulness and compassion rather than the unwholesome seeds of greed, hate and delusion that causes affliction or some kind of suffering.

[36:59]

So we're looking at what are we watering in our practice? What are we attending to constantly like a garden? How are we carrying through the garden so that what comes forward from our effort is something that is deeply nourishing and serves many people? So to cultivate and practice Vira Paramita, we can consider five key factors or aspects that are needed. And these are desire, you can also say aspiration, vow or intention, integrity, courage, and hope. And so what I'd like to do is quickly run through each of these five factors. The first factor is desire or aspiration. And desire here doesn't mean the negative connotation that desire typically has, particularly in Buddhism, which is that of attachment or grasping. So that kind of desire is a selfish desire.

[38:03]

And we're encouraged to actually tame or modulate a selfish desire. The desire here that we're talking about is an expression of aspiration, which is inherently unselfish. So it's the fuel for a joyful effort that is made on behalf of others. And Rabbi Anderson, in his book on the six paramitas, says that aspiration is the source of our energy as we walk the Bodhisattva path. The word aspiration is related to the words respiration and inspiration. Its etymology is to breathe into or to breathe onto. So Bodhisattva practice arises through our aspirations. and aspiration continues to breathe life and spirit into our practice.

[39:10]

So another name for this, or before I talk about bodhicitta, it's very interesting, I find that the COVID-19 itself, one of the key markers of it is the way that it impacts our capacity to breathe, right? So this practice of our aspiration inspiration, respiration, being able to breathe life itself into our own being, but also into our practice and how it is that we connect to others. And so this positive desire that we're talking about here is another name for it is bodhicitta, excuse me, which is the desire to realize the enlightenment for benefit of all beings. And when bodhicitta is strong, It helps us to release selfish attachments to our efforts and fuels our determination to practice despite any hardships or challenges that we might encounter on the path.

[40:12]

Such as something stuck in the throat and not being able to speak. Naked and hard to breathe. So the next factor for the cultivation of virya is intention or vow. And a bodhisattva, as it said, is defined by their vows. And a vow is an expression of a deep intention or vision. It's a vision that carries us beyond the horizon of what is actually known. That's what here and now, right? So with the noble aspiration, to be of benefit to all beings and do what we can to relieve suffering, the Bodhisattva then embraces their intention by making a vow or commitment, a steadfast commitment to it. And their vow, the Bodhisattva vow, serves to guide their every thought and action going forward.

[41:20]

So a clear vow or intention acts as a fundamental touchstone for us. to return to again and again whenever we lose our weight or our focus. So this is why often in meditation, in Zazen, we may hold, for example, the intention to pay continuous attention to the breath or to some other kind of touchstone for us to remain present, have contact with the present moment. And then what we notice whenever the mind wanders, we remember, our initial intention, and then we redirect our effort back to our original aspiration, which is to stay fully present in this moment. So whatever supports us to remember and come back to our aspiration, you know, is a benefit to us in our meditation practice. The next factor supporting virya is integrity.

[42:24]

or consistency. And integrity literally means wholeness. And wholeness means that everything in our life is put together as a whole, right? So our body, speech and mind and activity, all of it is one, right? When we are able to act with integrity, we're able then to maintain consistency of effort. And our efforts are at the service of a greater wholeness or a greater completeness. And therefore, when we are able to have a greater wholeness and completeness in mind, including the completeness of all being, all of existence, right? Then we're less likely to have our practice somehow become divided or undermined. integrity, this consistency of effort, this is how we develop strength of character, which is an important aspect of Dharma practice, right?

[43:34]

Todisafa has a strong character, right? A strong intention. And even though we may have, still have doubts or contradictions or disappointments or defeats in the midst of our practice or whatever our particular effort is, With integrity, we don't allow these to overwhelm or undermine us. Instead, what we do is we simply fold them into our overall practice, our overall experience. Then the fourth factor is courage. And courage means in French, large heartedness. And courage isn't fearlessness, right? but rather it's the willingness to face fear and go through it, to extend beyond our limits and align ourselves with a greater vision, you could say with our original aspiration. And doing so allows our hearts to stay large, to stay wide open, despite whatever fear and anxiety that we might be experiencing in any moment.

[44:45]

And the interesting thing is that courage also implies altruism, right? Because usually we're not taking courage just for our own sake, right? We don't drum up courage just for our own sake necessarily, but because we're willing to undertake a greater hardship on behalf of a greater cause and often on behalf of others in some way. So I see courage as sustaining love. It sustains the capacity to keep our heart hearts open despite any challenges that we might be encountering. And the final factor that's supporting the cultivation of virya is hope. And Norman Fisher describes the practice of virya paramita as essentially the practice of hopefulness. And this is not a kind of a foolish Pollyannish future-dependent hope. that says, don't worry, everything's going to turn out all right.

[45:49]

A bodhisattva doesn't depend on any particular outcome, actually. So rather, according to Norman, he says, a bodhisattva hope arises as a consequence of the practice of joyful effort. It has nothing to do with what happens or fails to happen. It has to do with the profound nature of being. So in other words, to a bodhisattva, being, just this life, being, presencing, is inherently hopeful in the sense that there is another possibility that can happen in the next moment. So being is a continuous unfolding. Out of this hopefulness, the bodhisattva is always joyfully going forward. Knowing there's something new that's going to arise in the next moment.

[46:52]

So they're not stuck in the past, right? They're not even stuck in the present. They're open to this ongoing unfolding of being and the possibility that comes with it. So you could say virya or diligent, joyful effort is ultimately about sharing our vast, boundless life. Okay, so those are the five key factors that are said to be essential in cultivating and sustaining very or diligent, joyful effort. Desire, aspiration, vow or intention, integrity, courage, and hope. And now I'd like to do is kind of open up the forum and kind of hear what it is, if any of this resonates for you in any way and say, do you have any questions or observations? in your own practice and the, you know, trying to maintain diligent effort, particularly during this challenging time. So I'm going to invite Tim to support us.

[47:57]

And I see one hand is raised. Jerry, Jerry Braze? Yes, David. Thank you. You're welcome, Jerry. Good to see you. Good to see you. Thank you for being available at these times. I'm finding that my energy at times, I wouldn't call it viria because it becomes an anger. It becomes a negative energy. And I think some of it has personal roots to it. And I'm dealing with it a little better, but it's still there and still, you know, something's frustrating or the like. It comes out with an overreaction. Other than seeing it, being aware of it, maybe even just riding with it and letting it go, do you have other thoughts or suggestions how that energy can be made perhaps to a more useful end? Thank you. You're welcome. Well, what's underneath the anger?

[49:00]

Anger is always a masking emotion. There's always something else beneath anger that we need to become. kind of aware of. So looking under anchor, what's under the anchor? I would have to say it's probably situational and what triggers it. Maybe the immediate one is, you know, jamming a pen into my thumb or something like that. Stupid, stupid things, but they give rise to, you know, emotional response. So I can't blame, but I can't blame that in the administration or a political action. So in that moment, pain, direct pain, discomfort, unpleasantness. I don't want this. Aversion to the experience, right? So anger is a no. And it seems out of scale. That's the point. And that often happens. Our initial reaction is so overblown in some cases. And so being aware of that, catching ourselves before it gets...

[50:07]

The fire gets too big and tortures us and tortures others. And often under anger is fear. I find that's often the case. We're afraid of something. And again, it's this kind of pushing away. I don't want to experience this. I'm afraid what's going to happen to me. I just want to note that. So again, it's okay to feel pain. It's okay to feel fear. So part of what we're cultivating is a self-compassion in this situation. It's okay to feel what I'm feeling, right? So rather than pushing away the experience, actually turning to it and acknowledging and saying, okay, this is what's happening, right? It's okay to feel this, you know? So having compassion if we're feeling pain, having compassion if we're feeling fear, having compassion for what... Whatever it is that's beneath the anchor, allowing it to be there, whatever that is.

[51:11]

And then from a place of compassion, from a place of love, what do we want ourselves to have in that moment? If it's like, well, I don't want to feel pain, then giving ourselves, may you be free of pain. It's actually just this way of giving ourselves permission to want things to be you know, pain-free, you know, to want to not have fear about our well-being and our life. You know, it's okay to want that. It's totally okay to want that. Now, the skillful means, the upaya comes in the fact of, well, how then are we going to move forward? Again, our diligent effort to move forward into the next moment to get that need met or addressed in some way, right? And so taking a pause and stopping and say, how can I address that need in a way that doesn't exacerbate my suffering, in a way that doesn't dismiss what I'm feeling or dismiss what another person is feeling, for example, but actually says, okay, this is what's going, what's a way to address the situation, to bring ease to the situation, to myself in some way.

[52:30]

So that's one approach that you might explore. Thank you, Jerry. Good to see you again. I see Elena Mosco. Thank you. I find a little bit of a conflict in my mind trying to reconcile and balance the concept of beginner's mind versus my personal history and my family history of crisis and pandemics and It's not all negative because there was also perseverance and lessons learned and ability to carry forward. So how do I balance the two? How do I make them friends and bring them together so that they can support my practice during this time? You could talk about that, please. So beginner's mind is this idea that the moment is open.

[53:33]

that what we think we know isn't necessarily the way it is. So anything that has happened in the past is now a story. It's a narrative. Yes, something happened. Yes, it had impact on us. We don't want to deny that or write that off in any way, but it doesn't need to define us ultimately. So in the present moment, when we put the story aside, and ask ourselves, who am I in this moment without that story? I didn't have that story. Who am I fundamentally? So in this very moment, I can be free of the past, of the story of the past, I should say, in some way. It doesn't mean that we still don't have vibrations and impact from what happened to us. whatever trauma, whatever family encounters.

[54:34]

But I don't need to let that define me going forward. Again, there's forward attention to what now, what do, how do I want, what's my aspiration for how I want to be going forward, despite what it was that happened in the past. So then with that inquiry... that mind of curiosity and question, how do I want to move forward? It's not that I'm not informed by the past, but I don't let it hinder me. I don't carry the baggage of the story forward in order to, because I identify with it. So again, this is where aspiration, And then our intention to realize our aspiration and hopefulness become very important. I have the hope that another way of fully being is possible.

[55:39]

So not denying the past, but not getting stuck there and not believing that that's going to limit me in some way. And then deciding for yourself, what future do I envision for myself? What possibility, not even future, what possibility in this very moment do I envision for myself that I want to give energy to, to manifest? Is that helpful in any way? Thank you. Thank you, Nina. Look at the next hand. I lost my... Next person is John. John, great. Thank you. Yes, John. Hey, David. Thank you very much for taking my question. I'm thinking about... I mean, this thing we're on right now is one of the most basic things for... Like, I remember her from my very first Sashin being so freaked out with the pain that the only way to get through it was to do metta.

[56:47]

On the other hand... I kind of have this sense of like, I'm going to graduate out of Metta and I'm going to eventually be able to just observe without having to use a calming practice or something. The thing that's coming from mind overall is there's a quote from Nagarjuna that I keep returning to because it's one of the only places I see him mention meditation. And that's when he's talking about karma. And he says, abandoning I think he's talking about kleshas or trying to get rid of karmic effects. He says, abandoning, that's not abandoning. The only way to abandon is through meditation. And for me, that implies our Soto method. That implies a non-involvement of basically letting the negative pattern spin down and just kind of like Suzuki Roshi says, the magic of the world is that when you watch it, things disappear.

[57:50]

It's the sense of attending to it and helping it. But even meta itself is still impure in the sense that it's adding something to it and it's going to, again, have some sort of fruit in some way. Does that make sense? I would say meta is a matter, again, of skillful means, upaya. So all these, you know, practices outside of just presencing, you know, just shik and taza is a way to, when the kleshas do come up, you know, when unwholesome afflictions do arise and we find ourselves again tangled in old karmic conditioning, what is the skillful means in that moment to address them? It may not be that we're ready to just do open, balanced awareness. You know, it's not, we don't have that capacity yet. We don't have the skill, the strength to just do that, right?

[58:51]

So then we turn towards, okay, I need some support here. Out of compassion for myself, right? Out of recognizing that this is a karmically conditioned being. What would be the most compassionate, skillful means for working in this moment? This was what Buddha was always doing in terms of how he talks. Really responding to... the person, the karmically conditioned person that was showing up in front of them and trying to find a way to speak to that person in the moment of whatever conditioning they were struggling with or expressing in a way that pointed towards a path of liberation. And it may be that we'll have to again and again be reminded and fall back on, rely on these particular tools or skillful means until whatever karmic conditioning or klesha or not, right, is deeply wired into our sense of being and self, has dissolved and released and let go.

[59:59]

And it doesn't maybe return anymore. And then we might be truly free of it, right? But that's a lifetime unfolding, you know, of entangling. You know, it doesn't necessarily mean it's getting... It happened once and we're going to be done. We keep coming back again and again to many of the core conditioning habit patterns or afflictions and making the effort to continue to melt them or dissolve them by bringing awareness to them and seeing how much can we be with that conditioning in a way that doesn't reify the conditioning itself. I hope that... offers a supportive response in some way. Yeah. Okay. Thank you, John. And anyone else who has something to share? And I just realized I looked at the clock and I saw what time it is.

[61:04]

So it is 630 and I want to be able to respect and honor your time. Um, And so since I don't see a hand that's immediately coming forward, why don't we say goodnight? And I just want to, again, appreciate your practice and your presence here. It's very encouraging and supportive to me. And I hope that you find it also supportive to have everyone else together in this particular way. So I wish you well. Perhaps we'll see each other on Thursday for our next practice session. Okay. Take good care, everybody. Thank you. Thank you, David. Good night, everyone. Thank you. Good night. Thank you.

[62:02]

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