Tenzo Kyokun Class

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what's different about this rumor says
did you all decide to do that it was the said
just happened
i think
born here is devastated the fireplace thrust after our i see
how we can see everybody everyone can see what they have
so does their last class so and like as we will ever gathered this way again we all realize this to me and so like everyone to say their name again linda micro daily journal mary show on when jeff
right
catherine
and that happen you have our to india where currently in a month
your care

robert they wrote it
come
you have any chance
have you have an new it is but you can hear just fine of cake
what it says interesting
video
oh i want to i forgot i had wondered us to each koran when we set our name to say
what our favorite food is oh yeah let's do that so let's try that again fried tofu it go the other way again after fried tofu
but don't think about me
however and say that bread
mashed potato classic abalone your is what was it potatoes with great
go crazy
how can you know maybe
ah chocolate
quickbooks to benefit
the and
first burns
fresh care pieces pieces happen
hundred pounds
change your out our products that
advocate of last week
it
peterborough parmesan cheese melts
the
sector rice and beans pizza sushi
eight years
kerosene should carrots five
i can't make a wrong
i to say
oh it's endless
creates a climate cilantro
have no other definitely sushi yeah juggling everything that everybody said i'm a pescetarian and oranges i established
he just just
sharing tangos
mark
raise the that's my favorite the karma
okay let us let us
reddit
let us return to the tens of kilcullen of
i wanted us to
actually this was my idea for tonight's clash i've thought remember the first class we read the whole thing through and i thought wouldn't it be interesting the last class to read the whole thing through again and see
there's if there's something else that comes up but before we do that i wanted to look at page thirty seven
oh and i'm in a pest good attendance
yes that one dungeons and think i do tonight
yes could just spare
i'm assuming
a silly question yes
request a silly request if we agree on the moon and employed which the vestibule well hello as about that twice today
genius
for those of you who weren't at the class last night the wicked witch of the west visited the congress
behind when i didn't see the face so happy
i was the first card
i do a a an imitation know i'm having
yeah no person makes a better job than the channel and eleven
okay
well you know if the causes and conditions are right but i am not sure they will unless you know yes theseus and another tax
you i found something in very interesting in this book cause and visions
visions of power i think it's by bernard for
it's about present in medieval times and
different aspects of zen and can talk about the fly whisk that in a haiti i think there's a like a mural that shows our huts riding fly whisks like witches you know the fly with the the way to horsehair wisdom you can
so i thought that was a nice kind of turned to be riding it survey sort of harry potter actions yeah there was an order we could for the with which can you tell us with those risks whisk
well it's to fly whisk you know that or flicks is supposed to flip plaza way without killing them just and ah
you know it's
you receive it after dharma transmission it's one of the twenty me si and then it's carried at different ceremonies precepts ceremonies and
which include weddings and anytime that precepts are given so weddings or nations yeah
funerals
if i mean that they start carrying them for ceremonies just a click away flies that i don't know and of the origin of wimp but i think they were
the host to host to in japanese is some
you often read stories where there's something about the west you know the holes up the whisks usually he halted the whisk so i'm not sure the origin that i think probably the earliest origin is flicking flies away from while you're sitting meditation right without hurting anything and
then it probably evolved into a symbol of
ah
authority are being a teacher something
okay so i'm page thirty six i wanted to
you look at
the middle of page thirty six where it says in the second paragraph on the left do not comment and the quantity or make judgments about the quality of the ingredients you obtained from the director just sincerely prepare them definitely avoid emotional disputes about the quad
oddity of the ingredients all day and all night things come to mind and the mind tends to them at one with them all diligently carry on the way
ah
and then i mean on page thirty seven a second paragraph
ah down a little bit so even when you are making a broth of course greens do not arouse an attitude of distaste or dismissal
even when you are making a high quality cream soup do not arouse an attitude of rapture or dancing for joy if you already have no attachments how could you have any disgust
therefore although you may encounter inferior ingredients do not be at all negligent although you may come across delicacies be all the more diligent never alter your state of mind based on materials people who change their mind according to ingredients or adjust the
our speech to the status of whoever they are talking to or not people of the way
so i just wanted to one
highlight that and and have us talk about that a bit
this do not comment on the quantity or make judgments about the quality and then treating each thing with the same mind of sincerity and
and not flying into rapture with a cream soup and
dancing for joy with with the high-quality ingredients and having discussed above the other ones so i think this this is something that
i just remember a story from when i was at customer i think
i don't remember which practice period it was but
we had ah
been having just
for dinner we have grewal you know in the evening it tells her that the evening meals a true bone meal it's just medicine meal
you're all familiar with that medicine meal
so let me go back a little bit in buddhist time
they would have one meal a day a great big meal before twelve noon they would go and with on their rounds and then have a meal from there begging bowl and
then they wouldn't eat again until the following day and this particular practice worked in hot countries where you know how to use with it's really really hot you don't really
need as much food sometimes plus
while they were probably sitting in a you know zaza the they have some happy so they didn't need to eat it
but anyway when when these practices moved into colder countries it didn't really make sense to have this rule about not eating afternoon because while china's gets very cold tibet is very cold korea japan they are very cold so in those countries
there was a meal in the evening called of medicine meal is just medicine just to get you through the night so it's a smaller meal and it tests her and here greece she's we don't have for the buddha tree so we have breakfast and lunch and there's the buddha cd-rom and the boot tray has offered but for the evening meal there's no offering it's it's not seen as
a meal just don't chanting
i guess you haven't had those if you we haven't done associate here yet don't know but because one day series we and now before dinner but when you have three meals a day of third meal is just two balls it's usually left overs and test hurts almost always left overs and that in the big ball and then
a vegetable
in the second ball here often the tensile will make i don't know how you did in the city would often they'll be
it could be something fresh also in the in the beautiful like noodles or potatoes or something it but just to boss so it's seen as medicine to get you through the night
so at tassajara this one practice period we had been having
just eating from the garden and it was squash and greens every night or on grewal i think it was cruel and squash or girl in greens grow and squash and group increase and then one hate i heard
that their that they burned the green so there wasn't enough greens or something and we were having stewed apricots even a second ball these are apricots them
we used to go in the summer and gathered them around
fresno bring them back to test our and dry them in the sun and then maybe stood up in the winter and they were just ah
and not only wasn't even going to be in a small boat was going to be in the
and i remember saying i was going around to people saying did you hear as advocates and we're going to have a apricots and a second thought you know some people citizen okay so let and other people like just about as excited as i
and
this is going into raptures and dancing for joy thirty photo of into the high quality
of the ingredients and it's
you know i kind of got it somehow as a i realized how i realized how excited i was about
and it was much more than
just a change of pace it was like
a very emotional kind of thing
they were search and we got seconds
and the middle ball in a william
the report it or the soup middle can really carry a lot and patriot filled with stewed apricots and then second but there was way too sweet and yeah it was really sweet and kennedy was really it was too much relevant
so having this even my goodness you know whatever with whatever is offered which is the practice
you know we eat to support life and to practice the way of buddha this food is good medicine to sustain our life know what we say in the meal tan and as a practice working with that so that
you know whether you like to to africa so don't like to advocates it's it's feels like medicine and this isn't to say that we don't enjoy
you know a feast or a treat there is up there's a chant we to do at t which is some which everybody's to stumble over and see if they can do it
now as i take food and drink i vow with all sentient beings to
ah sharon furniture the pleasures in and to truly and fully enjoy the dharma something like that but and head about the pleasure was about
you know to really enjoy a pleasure we say that everyone you do that for breakfast
what leads to do it he came just a tee time and we don't it's kind of got into disuse here we actually don't use it
so and and then of this as a practice with food you know unhappiness as a practice with full watching the mine studying the mind that leaped for joy when you see your favorite dish and you know they were you know off forget you're eating three meals or aoki most of the time it's everyday up you know some people
you your preferences this was all the food you were going to really get i and there was backdoor food and hairball day once well but this was kind of it and you you know sometimes you'd be serving you hear people say
topher
end of the if thumbs if you are serving it is one's job as server to stir the pot thoroughly go from the bottom up so you're not just taking off them you have brought the other people's a broth brought that you know you have preferences you want you need a little more
roth's you need more protein give it to me you know and then certain servers you would just oh no not this server because they always they didn't stir you knew they didn't start and and other one oh good it's a good server that you would feel like you're at its best restaurant where you're really being served well by you know
so and juice or yeah i remember when like stewed fruit juice
anyway
so what is it like to sit there watching the late miss all the tofu and just get the other things i've heard of the and and can one be settled with that and
at peace and
except that and let gorgeous cuff with
so these are very difficult practices somebody you might say well it sounds funny but
the story that ribbed houses about that to rate isn't that about the protests when he returns
for those of you don't know it the server i think that server just skim from the tap and and the service would get all the croutons later in the surface we'll great and and then afterwards him coming out of this then know and realizing you know he had come to studies in and here he was you know upset and angry about crew cabs and he had come
this fire to study the way and you know it come down to this camp
and i think the the cry they become out the zone of cry i think we didn't hear that
he didn't tell you that way i think he cried afterwards
but don't quote me maybe this to be read
yeah this is a a rib story from qatar but
anyway just feeling gum
what it was just one via who humility now ashamed or something that to be that caught up with
getting you know crickets or a pistol
so i'm i'm just wondering if anybody has been practicing that way or has anything they want to add to that has been watching this kind of practice both from the cooking side you know be really happy when you get good things to cook with and or about the meals that are conserved
and how that's been going for you all for us ah yes
i've been working kitchen
and it's always because you're letting you go
it's your was bad turnips period reasonable
i don't have to wait through prejudice
just you and i couldn't imagine how they perceive to be transported to a that i was like to me and i was praying i wouldn't have cooked charming than that i was watching you know this goal
scenario one of my mind laughing to myself at the same time and then the next day i listed and a friend of mine wrote me lunch which was the terms
a row for the suturing with exquisite he was absolutely delicious to i don't know how it was transformed but the whole thing just with very using because i could see all i attached as and then being sick and still have somebody bring me a generous or
offering still wanting to push it away by word
and what i was over enough to it was a gift
your that reminds you of this story about mother teresa maybe you've heard this story someone went as a volunteer to work in calcutta with mandatory sing
e m help bring literally people who were dying from the streets carrying them to the
a house there i can't remember the name the house and co kind of it and there was this one man that he helped brought in and he was he was practically dead and they served him superyacht broth and spoonfuls and then over time and he was so grateful this man he had been literally picked up out of the dust heap and
he began to get a strength back in about four five days you say you know i don't like this soup
we have anything else
i think that is such a great story about human nature you know the impact that reminds me if something happens minutes and every other day i was serving tea they sitting and i was doing the slaughter and i have no t and nurse that's me
message
that you know
the area i just i liked it i said
when tests i am i asked the observer and she said that show that's not the fault michelle
the
the air
i went out to give a i will have to get the paper the other morning for those etc we have a
the homeless people that sleep on the doorstep and a when this one homeless guy was in jail another guy took his place and so i walked out and i thought i'm going to give this guy some breakfast you so i come back with a tray of stuff and i put me down and he doesn't say you know it doesn't say
thank you to say yes and salt
abs or forgot to follow you know and like i get things to do but okay i go back and get the soil so i bring it out and he goes can i have some milk i'm okay got it you know
this
you get milk here
know i don't know that's the height and weight or and the
michael you can see why i am
i do a little dance whenever the sesame soy beans
i think maybe the only person into our practice period that does perhaps but and i just absolutely think does increase in the world and you know linda out mind that i think it's the greatest thing in the world it doesn't seem to really blow me too far off course and i'm not like really trying to challenge the teaching or anything but i'm fine with that
i mean the rapture yeah rapture might be a little dramatic but i mean like there's certain
there's certain things in life that kind of get to help plays with the what are you know
a adults in that's really so wrong i mean i just don't see that like you know our our ups and downs that we experience not only in practice but in life and everything i don't see that there that it's so bad if there are highs and lows that that we have to squash him down so that there's this you know cover very small small way
in a deeper trust in ayer crests
and maybe a theoretical saying no no they know i don't but how do you feel about never alter your state of mind based on materials people who change their mind according to ingredients or adjust their speech to the status of whoever they are talking to or not people of the way do do you see any problem with you know adjusting your speech towards peace
people that a or or you know like
i think this is a good point because it's not about squashing once
life into
the military know nothing bothers me the thing you know it's so so what michael's bringing up his
if we go dance for joy at rapturous would we see our sesame soy beans then what are we you know then is it just
to be an automaton or something yeah and i don't think that's when saying so grim as far as the adjusting today i kind of see link there but i do i do adjust my speech depending on who i'm talking to for instance if i if i can only raised to my experience with my classroom my my students i i speak to
them as adults but i also can carry on a conversation with them in a manner that is different than and conversation would help with you it doesn't mean the quality isn't there
thinking they get it right
the so what i heard you say is according to the person you're speaking with you speak to them very particularly to enter but the quality which i would see my lowest tides beach or laughing
speaking for the benefit of that person trying to keep that are that doesn't change turn on board artist but according to the person
it's gone muses whoever you talking with you gotta we go in thereat and right
i think it's his name with the food blogger so
good both about this the patriarch
you know the shin shin me
about know picking and choosing re by isn't that where we're say no likes or dislikes known
so save up at more i mean i'm just sort of pressing you a little bit pro because i have often felt i mean i think it's just such a beauty and like saying i'm going to accept whatever is in front of me and you know i'm watching she should fall out of a pipe this morning
great you know and now i am i standing at the pope cottage that's great too
but but i still have likes and dislikes i mean you know i mean on the whole i'd rather be at cottage that in cleaning out the sewer africa remember
and if are you altering your
and that's true you know flowers fall with that this is from what town catch up on flowers fall with our sadness right it's not send but anyway whatever it is in a task and powdered form in canada and weeds grow right but does that
does that change how you deal with the sewer or how how you are in hope in in a fundamental way like like microsoft
and that will last but i mean but i'm not a perfect you know i'd much rather be at her college i mean the reality of it is is that how far away from it all i am says would rather be at her cottage you know
but when you're doing your work are you at sewer for raise your head and hope cottage know about the sewer well there you go
i think this is really an important point because
i think they're gets to be a misunderstanding about then that we're not supposed to have when as was to be human or something and if we could just get com enough and get it all in you know then nothing would bother us again up or earlier it said where does it say here if you already have no a
attachments how could you have any disgust so the only reason we have discussed is because there's attachments they're right there
so but it's not
we don't experience pain that we can't be heard that we don't
you know we are moved by the sunset and that things really smell bad i mean it's
it's not there that we're trying to
push those things down it's more can we just let go can we not cling to her or let go of it not be grasping at those things and believing now there's this thing i came upon today or the other day which is a call on where
the monk and the teacher see this crow to crows fighting over this frog and the teachers watching it and amongst sense something like come
oh how could it come to this and the teacher said it's all because of you
so if it's for the this it's there is some nothing it out there like turnips for example turnips are not inherently anything you know turn up sir what the significance you give to turnips is turnips
for you into somebody else it means their grandma or whatever so and so we loved them are we dislike them according to our own worlds according to the meaning that we place on them
so
so knowing that you see if i can even say this knowing that we have this feeling of allowing or letting go because we know we created it it's all because of us like that it's because of you than he looks at that
frog and the crows and says how did it come to this
you know from the girl's point of view this as lunch you know this is this is great and the curve point of view from the frog point of view he may be saying i'm a body and i give myself to these crows we don't know if the frogs practices
is so but for us to say off this is really terrible that's that's because of us so if we're very clear about that
ah
that's the com and i'm talking about
or that's the
if you have no attachments how can there be any disgust than each day has its
each the has complete value absolute complete value each thing in and of itself
and and and deserves your full respect whether its course greens or cream soup and your likes or dislikes does not change that but often our likes and dislikes push us around so that we actually do tweak
you know the greens a little bit these old greens again what have you know we don't treat them
it was full respect rape why because we don't like him that much you were bored of them and we're tired of him
so how can we actually understand you know i'm really tired of the screens and treat them with sincerity kindness full attention to see
who hands are coming up problem for i'm i don't know who was first
god
he was your first question was when scientists now practice about food and i was reminded alpha think was that my first machine first or second and
somewhere and office machine that some nails pincer and i stopped as editor of friends from their mailchimp have stayed with me that great
it's essential to keep them live free from ephesus artistry and
pop something came around and i i saw myself get extremely anxious that it should reach me and efficiency enough of it and it shouldn't be very good and i didn't have time i don't know there's just some whole thing came of problems pot and whatever it was i don't know and
because it was the shame because of that chat
ah
i want i got to do with sit was great i got to see what this man this question that's being asked to i that i was very concerned with also and still and the is like i gotta sit with the sense of grief for a couple of days and it started with the first desktop was greed like amazon and was my first
because i was in will i see down there and i was grief that you're sharing a bathroom own language
unlike the guest house or something like tell are know and i was great ever get back and i like
it was like i could see like it was all about me it was all
i had to have this food i had to have this bathroom and i because it was the shit i didn't have to you'd kept around five was such as still and on so
hi i didn't have to argue with his ideas get like i got to see a glimpse of what it would be like
well well a glimpse of why it would be nice not to be attached to having attachments you know like i a kind of on it to keep being attached and mean like i wanted to keep having desire and then i didn't like the idea and i started to see that that wasn't what it was a again
so i found that was like the flu crackers really opened something up for me and i don't want from expressing it grew up in stick on islam but but but you know and i think that the it's an incredible opportunity to just like
watch all to come up whether it's around transfer
i mean happened for the grades to from soap
but
and i felt you express their very beautifully
the i'm in the preface to one this book at brown
wrote the preface to the
tokens pure standards and he mentions being at a buddhism psychotherapy workshop
and the teachers saying the therapist who is leading it was saying that cultures that have a lot of ritual around food do not have eating disorders which or or less of a problem with eating disorders more ritual around food
so
i think we get a chance because the a formal meals and i so highly ritual lived you know we get a real
a rare really rare and unique chance to work with these kinds of things you know the foods i remember that food sitting there and it was getting cold
and we had to wait and they were so slow and then we had to chan and and buddha drum
and there were because i like really hot super eight
so this is suffering you know it's it's not that preferences are bad it's just that they're suffering you know it's painful and then we when we don't get it the way we want then we treat other people
poorly because they're standing in our way to get you know that's what the preferences in the
ah attachments we we will hurt people
in order to get our preferences met you know so hurt hurt himself and others in and gets both
so there is lots of other hand ca
i i can okay when it when it comes back
onto the man way
corn which own brought up some families and is where to about watching so if your work or forester clear car or oil tanker spill or something like that how to address that is not a that or you know not
you're wrong is just bad
yeah yeah
the
you know there's this
teaching that every single thing in the world there's a harmony if there is actually harmony and then you know as soon as you hear that you think
but but but but what about clear cutting what about oil spills and what about
when she does that what about genocide in and homelessness and and wait a minute everything's in harmony you know this can't possibly be so you get to him disjunction between what the teaching is and
bees
terrible things and and then you can bliss i mean there's the list goes on forever suicides and child abuse and you name it you know you could be so
so this teaching is not
an excuse for not doing something about the world they're not doing something about suffering or about what we feel strongly buckets and gesture
and i think that the teaching can be used as a excuse for not doing anything
it's all in harmony it's for the best or i suppose another tradition as they won't do god's will or there's some way you can use the teaching and we talked about this olympic pervert it to em
justify doing nothing or
so
like when people say it's all good
yes
that's really annoys me
there were that's a common expression amongst young people today what do they say it's all good
is that because they've taken ecstasy use this is the as as cool also gets caught in a burmese they a well good whatever
yeah well you know in some you could say that the teaching says that it is all good and because it's if you m
you know when we talked about emptiness when whatever class that was when we were talking about the emptiness of
so you can take
a situation like
anything and you can analyze it into its parts and you can see that it doesn't actually
it doesn't exist in the way we think it exists but conventionally speaking it does exist that way meaning that forest is being clear cut even though there really is no forest there you know so you've got the the emptiness absolute teaching in the relative or the conventional so
we
so does to act as if the conventional doesn't exist is some is just trouble you know is en-us ah being caught an emptiness in some way
leslie has just come in the room hi leslie
yes
i address yes
feeling of it was kind of work
a prison for
my own personal and were standing close to the it helps you to
i forgot what i was reading but there's something recent one of says reviews
as the arabia is something reps that he was basically the if you have able to remind about everything including your being faced things like
major governmental trump or better i think
if you can even watch your judgments rise in refrain from getting caught up in a survey sort of there that can cripple you basically but if you're able to be clear about it not a college doesn't through your see them and accept them and still work towards them
your value system but it just in time that can cut up intimately acquainted with the cripples your what you're doing that so it's been like
for example like a book out of the state of american politics it and if you feel that you have it if it challenges considerable about how overwhelming it is that you know all this wrong things are happening ridiculous are stupid
if you get caught up in those values and i think that
that can send you into it out the folks to or i can send you into can just self crippling state of depressing you know it why not this country it's horrible i can't do it because the perilous you know but if you if you can see that instead of
a value way or or least your own judgments and how they're affecting your actions and kind of will separate yourself from them a little bit you know stand back and i think you're able to
maybe better
as fits your review what you do
got another with asked to enter the chinese what they doing to back
i could be a week and then they would be controlling how i want to feel

going going back in food i ate the food here has been stone wonderful the whole time i can relate to this day to every dislike so good sometimes i wish i was a little more challenge to and maybe not writings on the food and maybe i'll be something new look at this
so buy think it's affiliates

my liking or disliking are a few a neutral about food i guess i want to hear his areas of food that someone to really dislikes yeah yeah what are they would work at a nominee of
because we're like you're being represented and options of us a day during the continuance of even i feel like you have want a half feet cities and there's always dairy and my shoes i was attached
we couldn't as chickens intercourse
did that answer your question anticipating a thursday
i i mean just it is such a good it is such a good analogy for everything in here
and large scale a lot of what have you have been talking about to is this a you know how is it hours it you know if you if you dislike something or like something you just feel sort of neutral that's what the when you're eating how is that's more to you know what type of work you're doing with an idea of a cottage or or something like that and
i mean sometimes i think it's almost like if something case really strange it's it's almost it's almost like whoa it's so strange is sort of interesting in a way and is that is that's the thing that's kind of a like that sort of a judgment to it's a well now having interested in history of executive didn't investing
as i was that the same before it's not that we go enjoy our food it's that we don't is that that we
we don't try to halt like if you enjoy some delicious thing it's like having your cake and eating it to right i never understood what that meant as a kid course you can have your cake and you can eat it too i didn't understand but meaning have it there on the plate to look at it and there's the enjoyment of who the anticipation of getting to have it and all that you can't have that an
eat it too right so so the m you can enjoy your food but extensive are you said when it's gone or that you didn't get seconds or that and then you're depressed or are you been
of to bring that because like a thing and my body says you shouldn't eat yes so for you that medicine for you need other kinds of medicine that is not medicine for you one what does that one man's meat as the for one man's poison is no yeah
so each person has those kinds of things some people can't digest raw raw things aren't what garlic garlic or reiser
let's take the time to a tussle he can't have any fleet so that's that's just individual constitutions and bodies trafficking yeah yeah i mean that we eat to benefit you know we eat so that we can practice read and if you eat so that you feel sick then you're not going to have the energy and
ah stamina to to practice higher right so it
so there's that but then on top of that there's often an overlay of other choices that people make for other reasons not necessarily their body doesn't do well with certain foods it's it's a statement about
now is it's of it's a certain other kind of valve that people take about their food choices
and do that throw you around
you know or is that can that be let go of how strict is that and and then there's that i'm more pure than you think that can happen you know so it is that danger of the precept of praising self at the expense of others you know i don't eat yeah you know which then all the sun that goes like that it's
not just i don't need yeah it's
right and you want to make sure people know because then you can be untap you know so it's kind of subtle so that's the studying of the self
what's what's going on here how is the serving me in a certain ways this or is it just this choice and whether people know it or not doesn't matter
am i caught by it to i want people to know but i know that if i if they did know then they then that's not good practice but i really want them to know so how do i let them know without knowing i'm letting them to hook in her it's like secure she cleans toilets read that story you know that story
suzuki roshi cleaning the toilets in at school
i told him it rains more than a year now
oh
i've been i've been living in all for club and it's basically or reasons
i'm to be a poverty rather
i mean that choice that i really hard hard time like just accepting or author and now also during with about a stay of all vehicles because of what they do
didn't you just serve him right now but i walk when you go so either to speak to that are lie because it's really painful and it's really hard for me not to see a leg
the side of my father's
like i just i want that i just can't do it
as discussed so
he said
hmm
so this ethical choice and this wow do you find joy in the ethical choice i mean it's their choice that my great joy
okay
and ah
and
do you
so is it when you even think about it's like thinking about clear cut for us to suddenly you just have to think about it and you begin to feel upset and angry and disgust i mean i fell it out alive
it's not that bad
when you think about it when you begin to think about the egg production things or the egg itself
an egg me or zooming
mean putting it into your mouth
yeah job up here so it's not like you you're thinking about the
industry of
that kind of farming that's not what makes you just guess is actually the the food item itself no know is that is the industry and then by i think it goes interactive that colorado
i was suffering of ideas about like i life
last week because i knew i like this are know is seven years or better
generally discussed his and wars the whole organization and i feel like it is the reason why i'm disgusted by idea of eating it is because
yeah i know what's behind it and i'm still gonna just here
you know
for whatever reason
that makes sense
it sounded like the disgust kind of came down to
discussed with yourself there at the end for not following through yes true when not not like about standing up for what i do not pay a single part of something that i have so much i like to discuss i am using the but a lot alive
albums with oh and i don't want to come all this time now that's okay i think it's useful isn't it useful to your hand of getting to definitely
have a lot of albums with the industry the factory bar industry yes so i told me like but then but then when you find you can't you've made this balance and you feel completely behind it then you these situations where you want to eat the cake even though you know it's got or something like that and
then you then you're in this this spiritual and ethical
conflict inside and outside because you want it and you don't want it and everybody else is enjoying it and you want to join the party and you don't want to be feeling left out and then but then they've told these people them then they are going to say well how come you're eating mad and eight bright serves the whole thing just i also i just want it was was offering you know right not just like
yeah well this is
you know if you
pick up anything you know you pick up one thing and world's come along with it you know if you pick up anything you know you you have to contend with all that you know i don't feel like there's necessarily a way out it's more like this
this is what it looks like this is what it looks like to make any
choice like that you know you come up with it's not
you don't want some for all done free clean i did it you know it's there's complications and if there's a
ah if there is a motion around it and stuff there will be complications so in some ways you know the these admonitions you know to eat was offered that's it you just eat what's offered its i remember having a very strong experience about the third cookie you know like a third cook
while a couple things there is about being served plate of cookies and i can't remember what the third cookie story mushers lou rich men who will take the third cookie i can't remember that i won't tell that story but that's the story is to take the cookie closest to you
you know that story is just a practice that i can't remember who told me but when the plate of cookies comes around usually would come out at who was that once got more nets what that one looks like and i'll take that one
and that whole face to so painful you know they took it they took the one with the biggest piece of chocolate and the tap
here as it's get we'd have seen the plate would be passed from one to the other you know bow past the train
and then this practice of just take the cookie that's closest to you and that and it was like i was freed it was like an enlightenment six period i could just that it didn't matter who took it is just like the trade came in the one for me was the one closest and that was mine pass it
i was just free to get the feeling
well i remember time that store yes so now the cookies
i think about
scaled back to haunt her it's about but isn't different way of approaching the someday i will able to just take courses to me that this is
it is the different way of approaching our usual way is by our likes and dislikes rate keeping away from things we don't like and going after the things we do like and
and it goes like from one moment to the other it kind of goes back and forth back and forth sometimes within you know one instant it feels like it's a yes no you know
so it's not that you don't take a cookie
how are you going to take that cookie so that is
that you're completely with everybody and joined and free liberated
that moment with cookie
he has reminded me that am
at work i work as a nurse and you'd be you be a report and you hear about all the patients and then you get your assignment and you know you couldn't help but sometimes they oh
if you know oh j you and you just to see you just see what was going to install all the high and and it was really a was really a hard practice actually to just
listen and then just take what's given to you and go in and just try and meet that person without trying to think about what everyone else it said you know because you don't really know
yes and usually my experience was it was totally different than what the person instead
ah
but that idea of like picking and choosing a me i immediately
quite different situations yes it's like how do you pick and choose with no hand you know with no
what is the know picking and choosing a picking choose it because we have to pick up what are we going to put on we get up in the morning we and even to to where nothing is a choice you can not get out of it that's
so when they say just avoid picking and choosing what to say mean it now
as is the off
god we to be very draining like to strengthen them from virtues
that they are worth it was just are very smart very clear says far to divine you just do whatever job the what comes in for of a woman do every time peppers and have a camera goes good they'll take advantage of the buffet
that journalists so i better than before
is showed up after know that's worth
i happen to do it as long as the to get out of balance
so i went down can assist and guy so i went there the tassajara for work period and a
over a period of a couple of years we had saved a gun work extensive work on some cabins and then i was going to go down
last spring and
i guess i'm a day last spring and i did one and then
i would then in the fall and i was gonna do another one and it requires crawling under these cabins right so the first time i did it i said i'm never doing that again i'm going to go down in the fall and i'll train people to do this
africa is limited i will carry a clipboard
am so i got down there and there was no one trained carpenter that could work with me so i ended up under the house again and i'm laying out of there to get pissed off and
squawking by game and one day and she knew i was here grumpy and everything and she goes to life is perfect in this moment and i just when
and so i was still a little grumpy until i got under the house under this cabin and i'm and i started to laugh because i said will you know
you know actually if you don't mind doing this you know like i i get dirty and like the thing in my head was i'm too old to be doing this but and somebody else should be doing this and this so i'm under there are going well who who else should be doing this you know as
and i actually don't mind doing it in fact i sort of enjoyed it so and it's like you and the turn of soup you know it's like this whole i just create my own suffering by saying that i don't like this my whole time zen center has i'm so i was
so picky as an eater i just pick and you know it had to be certain thing i would not use sesame soy beans for four years finally one morning i was cooking at tassajara and robert was the ten zo and i was cooking sesame soy beans and he's
said
i said robert would you try the abc you know before we send him up and he goes your as a cook and you try
i don't eat these things a and so i am and i loved them
happy here so
won't math that story the you just told him so it's not that she did enjoy doing the work right but it's unlike there was a whole
world and top that about protecting the future matt from became an advantage of
yes something i can hear from its
there are religions are
my own their has a practice or it can be fun during the web all those are so
are how congress for blindness are still around was solved knew someone smarter
i was kind of those years though he bought her
well
you know we have the some world views you know that are internalized like the one that came up for me as i've gotta be a manly man and they're not going to there in a not going to take advantage of me you know something like that and
i don't know it's like this then is that extra you know is that
right
there was a hand yes i just i have been so
have you ever since a boy
just my time here at zen center i've been so aware of how if i feel like i'm not going to get what i want like i suddenly become like a raving lunatic i mean and somehow that prevents me what i've really noticed is that i could just ask for what i want but somehow
that doesn't seem and now like i like have to call up the army i mean the army of my leg and i'm getting i'm going to battle now you know and i'm this is a fine you know someone's gonna get hurt you know enough to of i'm saying and meanwhile you haven't mentioned to anybody who really like ryan said
touch and hour or maybe could i just have their eyes so weird
i happened to
just involve ago
when when twelve years straight up asked my camp matter with a customized to this pricing in a very nice simple way all the time it's would give them the strip of resurgence yeah
oh i get this i don't to get that the hard as i just set of time room i don't want to do batteries again as bathrooms i'll ask you know like that yeah and and it just seems like a actor
this and in a way that earn enough much so you can just see it and neither to call an rv
whereas in other places may be army pants
yeah once you're involved in what you were dreading it's really okay yang it's it systems to build up beforehand and to tell you know i learned as a kid that if you dreaded something it was always much less worse than so i used to can practice dreading that was going to make things come to read
natalie would always together rather than the school announced as the number catherine and then asked
i wasn't really are you stretching okay
screw off the subject really well i don't beleive was and then you said it's like about being a manly man guess like i experienced by going to be predictive of
myself as well and i don't want to do
what do you want to go
i see if i guess a safe yeah well that's that's another one that's you know but is that were merely man is doing trying to make themselves save armor armor maybe so maybe so i think it just pointing out we have these internalized systems you know and if somebody says that oh that means that when actually we haven't even
in found out what it meant or we can also say you know i'd love to do this i love doing this but let's not make it and every week thing lets you could say that right but instead we strategize and you know or to keep our protect ourselves so this some
it it takes being very close to what's going on with us to know of there's that one coming up you know that i can actually talk about with somebody tonight i mean
no
so the safe thing might be
a strategy you might be strategizing in order to protect yourself or be safe and of course we will we want to live in the world are happy and safe may all beings be safe may all beings be right
so that's fine but
is it extra is their need for that is it
is there a threat there is it
safety at the expansive
being open to somebody you know like that i think and do they do and do you even know that it's about safety you know notes about them they're being too aggressive well it's really about you try to predict so they're just being exuberant maybe
i camp
he said quarter to i guess we're not going to read this out loud and we a degree of time
come on over morning the meals chef have a chance i reflects on africa brightest screwed
i often forget to put through the
i'm working on farm
i started closing eric
the old organisms that weren't together
creating the street for us and
me has been really helpful or knocking computer choose about this
wow
it's great timing granted all his platinum
yes to yeah
well there's been a great discussion your pickwick someone is that can has your husband visit that interesting our purposes today there was a bitter
yeah really great dinner
and i didn't have anything to do with it so yeah what was a was making breakfast room or worse
who's totally objective but i sat down with like ten people and i looked around and everybody had a different kind of spikes on their food you know one person who could nutritional yeast on this the camacho on that hot sauce chili peppers and this was really amazing nobody it tastes
the food here you know what were they enjoy
hello masters just code for a little crazy now
a guy says something about this so will the problem is all the spices are over there you go there are in india where you get your food and then you come into the dining room so you can like sit down and pasted and go back and so people just sort of do it know if we get advance you know there's the case it doesn't have enough space for and they are
i've just had like a thousand and stories come up with my yes cause of thing
one thing one of the happened this morning that was kind of funny imo the last two days in the kitchen i i was given the job during the sour
and so this morning for ten was handing out the jobs and in case someone soup and i thought like oh here we go again i'm going to be i'm going to get the south
it's okay i'll do whatever she asked me if she looks at me and she was january you sick of doing the and then and i you know oh gosh your developed when mr yeah but i'm happy to do it you give us a job it was just it was kind of fighting they instead you know i'm just ready to take what's offered then she gave me a choice
and then immediately set condition
well and the last thing was just about
one time and during machine i made decision to not used to moscow
you know and it's like sexual especially it a or the only spice that you have
you know it and i was really kind of nervous for for a little while about how i was going to get through this machine because of masha and expertly of a serial really attached to the and the hand i just really love the flavor of the cereal you know i realized they'd be careful when you could come masha you
can't really taste the serial says to me of the fall pursues the session was over i went back to important the colossi of epic you know it's just there was something or something maybe the salt or whatever
the thursday that
it's just so interesting to watch you know it to put yourself in a position where you can actually see your preference is coming at you know were autistics somebody was saying about you know how it is here it here at greenbelt all these things happen while they're happening all the time it's just we don't see them because there's so much else going on but when you narrow down here
your choices and you know the backgrounds moving around so much then we get to see our own story for what we create
the commercial story reminds me of them
one is issue says they won't say which an apprentice period i guess there are seeing how much commercial printer my cereal and they they said what you put so much commercial and it's it's like just dumping ashes on top you know because all you can taste is commercial and i realized
so i don't have to say exactly what it was there was something i realized what i was doing with that commercial
and that see what i was attempting to do which was
looks
change may spend our mind and
i wanted to
on page forty four if you if you will

it says some
in the second paragraph arouse as for the attitude while preparing food the essential point that this second com i mean left-hand column second paragraph is deeply to arouse genuine mind and respectful mind without making judgments about the ingredients about the ingredients
his kindness or coarseness so this is he says this in various parts he keeps coming back to this about
this the mind arouse genuine mind and respectful mine without making judgments about the ingredients his finest the coarseness so
this is like this stepping back and treating each thing as buddha right
and then
at the bottom of that paragraph it's talking about gifts and i i was just thinking about this season of gift giving in it
it dumb
it describes this offering to the buddha of one bowl of white water left from rinsing the rice and an old woman nice their stories you can find in the sutures an old woman attained wondrous married during her life and then to by offering just water the water that the race
was cooked in and king ashoka could generate his final great act of charity and thereby receive the prediction of buddhahood and enjoy a great result by giving this half a mango although they create relationship to buddha donations that are abundant but lacking in heart and not as
good as those that are small but sincere this is the practice of idiot person be so i just wanted to say something but giving and gifts
because we italy have the in the mill china also about the turning of the three wheels the emptiness of the three wheels giver receiver and gift and
horton's of the mind of the giver
and if not mattering so much what the actual material thing is but the feeling behind the the and when we know this straight this is
like a hallmark card or something it's but damn
yeah
their practices whereby you can give gifts the most wonderful gifts you can give to the buddhas and bodhisattvas you can give them in your mind this is the in shanty davis guide to a bodhisattvas way of life and there's a whole section
about where it's almost a visualization where he imagines giving the most fabulous and wonderful things to all the buddhist and autobody surface jeweled parasols and and you know canopies of
the most wonderful cloths and fragrant baths and foods and the most wonderful and what ever you can possibly think of i give these all to the buddhas bodhisattvas in my mind i
well because the buddhist body surface are worthy of our have given their life over for the benefit of the world so they don't need these things of course but it's as a devotional practice to to give and pay homage and a door and
with gratitude you give these gifts to the buddhas and bodhisattvas who are living in the world for the benefit of others like that as a practice
but anyway i i always found this rather
and then and i'm but intriguing but just
because we often think oh i don't have anything much to give such as if we have low on funds and so forth but but it it really is the the attitude that's that's necessary and with and without the attitude i mean you all may know of stories of x someone told me about this kid who
came into this room and there is for christmas christmas morning and there was a pile of gifts that were so huge that the
they got sick to their stomach actually this was an adult talking about their childhood they would walk in and all those presents had to do with the fact that
your parents were split up and they were trying to make it okay and they were you know
anyway and they would just get sick and i have to open them all you know and try to
ah
so anyway we know about what a supposed to be a gift and with isn't really a gift and what it feels like and to know that
it's the mind of the giver that that's the important thing so the gifts
our if they're another translation of this
oh no this is the same translation
he even if you you might give a donor's might give something like food to the monastery something and and there would be some karmic connection with the sagar buddha dharma sangha but if they're lacking and heart that that's that's where the important point is if they're lucky
abundant but lacking in hurt
he is less important than sincere heart and small
say that again like the gift to the magic our littlest angel
and the littlest each know i'm naturally know those stories and give to the manager of frankincense and myrrh all the oh oh oh henry
yeah all know better up
and the velveteen rabbit do everybody know these stories the mad to give to the magic that was she cut her hair to by to chain for his watch and he sold his watched by combs for her hair you know that pen story of oh henry
you know where it's a great place for
gives them the things are moving in various tassajara
because you're down there and like somebody's birthday or come up as just extraordinary all the little things that sort of appear
yeah rocks and leaves from who
and the last
three minutes
of the class i
hoped we could talk about the the a little bit more to but this is on page forty six
on the left-hand side middle of that peregrine
it talks about the three essential attitudes of an abbot and all it says the m the temple administrators the heads of the monastic departments meeting senior staff positions and ten xo included should have the three essential attitudes of an avid whenever they perform their jobs and the three essential attitudes or to
benefit others
which simultaneously gives abundant benefit to the self so
it's not a m oh don't worry about me i'll do it off for you i'll go sit in the dark you know that that it's not that it's it's we
the separation of self and other is is not so uppercut when we give for others we receive more the giver is the one who benefits
so
benefit
where is it
give abundant benefit to benefit others which simultaneously gives the bunch of benefit to the self and then make the monastery thrive and we knew its high standards and aspire to stand shoulder to shoulder and respectfully follow in the heels of our predecessors and those three essential attitudes they also talk about the three minds
of the avid for the abbess the sun shin three mind sancho in which are
dyson big mind magnanimous mind
and other translations of that are big grand great magnanimous and big
and that's
dyson and then roshan is what's sometimes translated as parental mine which in english sounds too authoritarian or something parental but it's the mind of the caring attitude of apparent that mind roshan it's also kind mind elders mind i think of
grandmotherly mind or something or nurturing mind as roshan
and then to share is joyful and all the translations are joy and joyful
so these are the three minds quiche and joyful roche and nurturing kind the attitude of a caring parent and dashing big man net magnanimous and those are the three minds for also temple administrate all the temple administrators and the tensile in particular
this doesn't i couldn't find there must be other treatises about the the adverts job because it's not in there they have us or the adverts job and these three mind seem to be
really important
the first run
die he she is greek and see great compassion yeah that guy's beak for compassion
die he shunned
when drivers extra syllables yeah it's die he should run
we have chanted the guarantee of great compassion the durante of great compassion so this is just die she and be mind or heart shaped his hurt
okay well i think we should stop you think you are very much i've i really enjoyed working on this with your own facts so much that i thought i wanted to i felt like there is so much there that didn't get touchdown actually the turning the light back
and just so many things that
i'm considering teaching it again for next practice through just to get into it more thoroughly some and
i don't know if people would take it again or sign up for it again but i just feel like a we haven't plumbed the depths there's just so much there and i didn't want to leave it too soon

just was tonight yeah we're trump that way
okay thank you very much
to me