This podcast is offered by the San Francisco Zen Center on the web at www.sfcc.org. Our public programs are made possible by donations from people like you. Good morning. And excuse me, Bob, for starting to put my hands up before you were settled in your seat. It's been a long time since I... had an opportunity to talk with you. As many of you know, I've been mourning the death of my husband for the past period. And recently we had an American Zen teachers meeting here. And Someone in that group shared with me, they were talking about good poems for funerals, and someone shared with me Uchiyama Roshi's poem called Life and Death, which I really appreciated a lot.

[01:15]

You know, Suzuki Roshi said, you know, I don't really want to die. I don't know what's going to happen when I die. Nobody knows what happens when you die. He said, but at least I know I'll be a Buddha. But this is on life and death, and it has an attitude that really is encouraging to me. He said, water isn't formed by being ladled into a bucket. Simply the water of the whole universe has been labeled into a bucket. the water does not disappear because it's been scattered over the ground, is only that the water of the whole universe has been emptied into the whole universe. Life is not born because a person is born. Life of the whole universe has been ladled in to the fixed idea called I. Life does not disappear because a person dies.

[02:20]

simply the life of the whole universe has been poured out of the fixed idea of I back into the universe. And somehow I find that as good a way to understand what happens as any, and better than many that I've heard. We won't know until we know. But I do like this understanding. So given that at this time each one of us is expressing the life of the whole universe, how is it that we want to live this life that's been given to us? That I think is the big question of practice. Here we've been given this gift of life by the universe. And it's up to us how we live it.

[03:26]

It's up to us to make the most of it, if you will. What would be the best thing we can do for the universe with this life we have? And I was prompted today to talk about One teaching of the Buddha, which we chant regularly here, which I'm very fond, the Buddha's teaching on loving kindness, which is one of four aspects of mine that are recommended to us by the Buddha, recommending that we... cultivate loving-kindness, compassion, empathetic joy, that is, joy at the well-being of others, and equanimity, or peacefulness, or ease, or impartiality.

[04:38]

These are called the Brahma-viharas, the abodes of the gods. Um... But this loving kindness, which is metta in Pali, we were chanting it when the Zen teachers were here, and one of the teachers, Haji Murray, who's the resident teacher at the Ann Arbor Temple of the Buddhist Society for Compassionate Wisdom, which stems from the teaching lineage of Samu Sunim, the venerable Samu Sunim, who is a Korean monk in the Son tradition, which is the Korean version of the Chan tradition, came to Korea, and it's called Son, came to Japan, and it's called there Zen.

[05:44]

Came here, we're still calling it Zen. from Japan. And she said, I do like this chant. As usual, I like the version I know. I like our translation because it's the one I know. So I said, well, why don't you send me a copy when you get home of your translation. I find it helpful to read more than one translation of the Buddha's teaching because you get a more filled out... It's not the original language, so it'll never be exactly, but you get a little better sense of it if you engage with different translations, I think. In any event, she sent me their version. I'd like us... We happen to have...

[06:47]

a lot of copies of this, of our version, because we continued to call it the Metta Sutta, which means a teaching of the Buddha, and it is a teaching of the Buddha, but we changed the ending a little bit from the sort of Theravada notion of our aim in practice to a more Mahayana notion of our aim in practice. That is, the Theravada aim in practice was to become sufficiently trained in wisdom and compassion that we didn't make any karma that would require us to be reborn in the world of samsara again. But in the Mahayana tradition, the bodhisattva takes a vow to continue to be reborn as long as any being has not been led to peaceful rest, which is what nirvana is.

[08:03]

So it didn't feel, the ending didn't feel quite right for those of us in the Mahayana tradition, so we changed it slightly. So then we thought, hmm, then maybe we better stop calling it a sutta and just call it a meditation on loving kindness. So then we had all of these copies, you know, that say metta sutta. So I thought I should share them with you and we can chant it today and you can take them home. So let's chant this together. Meditation on loving kindness. This is what should be accomplished by the one who is wise, who seeks the good and has obtained peace. Let one be strenuous, upright and sincere, without pride, be sweet and contented and joyous.

[09:11]

Let one not be submerged by the things of the world. Let one not take upon oneself the burden of rigidness. Let one's senses be controlled. Let one be wise but not buffed up. Let one not desire great possessions needed for one's family. Let one do nothing that is mean or that the wise reprove. May all beings be happy. May they be joyous and live in safety. All living beings, whether weak or strong, high or middle or low or else in existence, small or great, visible or invisible, near or far, born or to be born, you may always be happy, let no one deceive another, nor despise any being in any state, let not by anger or hate you, which harm to another, even as a mother at the risk of her life, watch the girl and her death for only child.

[10:20]

with a boundless mind should want to cherish all living things of beauty in love over the entire world above the love and all around the world so that one total faith in the good wills for the whole world, handing our wives, sitting on my dad, doing all one's waiting hours, let one practice away with gratitude, not foolish to fix you, so that will be inside, freed from sense advertised, one to achieve the way we'll be freed from the duality of birth and death, Will did the dedication at the end of the lecture. So this part has always been a huge, huge inspiration to me. Just as a mother, at the risk of her life, watches over and protects her only child, so with a boundless mind should one cherish...

[11:28]

all living things, suffusing love over the entire world, above, below, and all around without limit, so let one cultivate an infinite goodwill toward the whole world. This moves me every time I chant it or read it or think it. How is it possible for us to cultivate infinite goodwill toward the whole world? to cherish all living beings without exception. I think we have to, for one thing, recognize, as Uchiyama Roshi says, that this all living beings and we are not separate. All the painful states of mind we find ourselves in with anger or greed are about feeling separate. And when we really recognize and realize that we're all living one life, this stream of life that has been going on and on and on, we are joining that stream for the time that we're alive.

[12:47]

And we're returning to that stream as a whole instead of separate. when we die. So I think that working on this effort to really cherish all living beings, to really appreciate each other, and to recognize when people are doing harmful things, that they're doing it out of great suffering. And they're setting themselves up for even greater suffering because everyone will want to separate from them because of their unskillful actions of body, speech, and mind. I think

[13:52]

I will share with you this other translation so that you see if it opens up to you any more insight into what the Buddha is teaching here. This is what should be done by one who is skilled in goodness and who knows the path of peace. Let them be able and upright, straightforward and gentle in speech. humble and not conceited, contented and easily satisfied, unburdened with duties and frugal in their ways, peaceful and calm and wise and skillful, not proud and demanding in nature. Let them not do the slightest thing that the wise would later reprove. Now, this is describing someone who's really quite advanced in practice, I think. I don't know about you, but I see a lot of things on that list that I need to do some work on.

[14:59]

But I like being put out there. Well, let's see. How do you fit this? Well, humble and not conceited. Well, let me look at that again. Contented and easily satisfied. Peaceful and calm and wise and skillful. A little work to do there. But this gives us an aspiration for how we want to live this life in a way that is beneficial not only to us, but to the whole world. Let's see, this part that let none through anger or ill will wish harm upon another. Even as a mother protects with her life her child, her only child, so with a boundless heart should one cherish all living beings.

[16:02]

That's pretty close to our translation. Radiating kindness over the entire world, spreading upward to the skies and downward to the depths, outwards and unbounded, freed from hatred and ill will, whether standing or walking, seated or lying down, free from drowsiness. one should sustain this recollection. See, I skipped some part of it. So this meditation actually is the next part. May all beings be at ease, whatever living beings there may be, whether they are weak or strong, omitting none, the great or the mighty, medium, short or tall, the seen and the unseen, those living near and far away, those born and to be born, may all beings be at ease. Let no one deceive another or despise any being in any state. Let none through anger or ill will wish harm upon another.

[17:04]

So this is the meditation on loving kindness that we do. When we're Meditating on loving kindness, exactly this wishing all beings, wishing in gladness and in safety, may all beings bear ease. So in the meditation, in the traditional meditation, you begin with yourself. If you're going to radiate loving kindness, you have to begin here and love yourself, recognizing Buddha in this one. Each one of us is cultivating Buddha right here in this mind and body. That is the whole aim of practice, is to develop an awakening being here in this body and mind, to develop

[18:12]

a wise and compassionate heart and mind, and to let that guide us in our actions of body, speech, and mind, to live from that place of kindness, compassion, and wisdom in this very body and mind. This is, we maybe never get to that goal, but this is the direction we aim for. This is the aspiration that encourages our practice day after day, to be able to live in the world with a truly open heart, including everyone, excluding no one. This is our effort. This is the Buddha we would like to cultivate right here in this body and mind. And as Suzuki Roshi said, you're perfect just as you are.

[19:16]

You have everything you need. And there's always room for improvement. Because we need to be paying attention and see each moment if we are actually acting with body, speech, and mind in the way that we aspire to. With no ill will. without judgment, without disparaging anyone. One of the things that triggered my wanting to talk about this was a tendency that I have to make a snap judgment. And many of you in the room know my husband, Lou. One Back, oh, 20 years into our marriage, it lasted for 63, but about 22 years in, we were hitting a rough patch.

[20:22]

And we did some marriage counseling. And one day, he said to me, you have a dumb shit look. And if I see it one more time, I'm out of here. I said, wait a minute, wait a minute, I don't know what you're talking about. You're going to have to tell me that I'm doing it when I'm doing it, so I know what you're talking about. And it wasn't all that long before he said, there, that's it, that's what I'm talking about. And I looked inside, and I was thinking something very close to you dumb shit. LAUGHTER So, you know, we really have to pay attention to these kind of judgments we make and how we communicate them with a look.

[21:26]

And what brought this up for me is that someone in a private interview recently confided to me that at some point I think they said it was at Sejiki ceremony, when we dress up in costume, you know, we celebrate Halloween by doing a Sejiki ceremony. Sejiki means feeding the hungry ghosts. And so we dress up in costume as we would for Halloween. And this person said to me, so I came down in my costume and you... looked at me in such a way that I felt really diminished and hurt. I really appreciated her having the courage to tell me that. And I really want to give everyone in this room who lives with me not just my permission but my request that if I should

[22:36]

look with you in a judgmental way that feels like I'm putting you down in some way, I would really like you to say, there, that's it. That's what it is. No, I'm not kidding, actually. I mean, we can laugh about it, but that was a turning point in our getting our marriage straightened out was when he got me to look at the kind of judgmental way that I carried myself around. And so, you know, and it's... I don't think this is completely restricted to me. I think... I think making snap judgments of people happens to us a lot. Uh-huh. And that's why I have on my card the sticker that says, don't believe everything you think.

[23:41]

Because thoughts arise and they're just thoughts, you know. They may be true, they may not be. But I really, this, again, those of you who know me know that I love this song that Greg and Ben, wrote for a skit night one night about the Bodhisattva Never Disparage, which is in Chapter 20 of the Lotus Sutra. And the chorus goes something like this, and you can join me if you know it. I would never disparage you or hold you at arm's length. Where you only see your weaknesses, I only see your strengths. I would never despise you or put you down in any way because it's clear to me I can plainly see you'll be a Buddha someday. I love you.

[24:43]

Anyhow, it's a great song. And what I'm just talking about is apparently we can be disparaging with just a look. We don't have to say a word. and people will feel it and they will be hurt by it so really be careful really be careful how you treat one another remember each of you not only are you Buddha so is your neighbor so are the people that you live and work with and we're trying to cultivate Buddha wherever we go and so When we find ourselves making a snap judgment about somebody or putting somebody down, or about to, I mean, preferably before you open your mouth, you know, not after, but if it's after you open your mouth and say something disparaging, as soon as you notice, please try to have the courage to apologize.

[25:54]

You know, life is too short to... wasted on judging other people by whatever standards we may have. And it's actually not so good for judging yourself in a disparaging way. I mean, just like loving kindness begins with yourself, really being conscious of not disparaging begins with yourself. You can hardly be open and friendly and accepting of everybody else if you're squashing yourself all the time. So you can begin your not disparaging right here at home and let it spread out to include everyone. So I subscribe to Brother David Steindl Rast's website, and so every day I get a thought about gratitude.

[27:08]

And there are a few here that I particularly like and would like to share with you while I'm talking about our aspiration for how we want to live this life. This one comes from Shantideva. May those whose hell it is to hate and hurt be turned into lovers bringing flowers. So I wanted to include that because if you feel hurt by someone, this points out that People who hate are in their own hell. Hatred and anger comes out of your own suffering. And so, he says, may those whose hell it is to hate and hurt, to recognize that someone who has got a lot of negativity

[28:22]

they have to suffer it more than anybody. But the difficult thing is that it spills over onto everybody. And then this one is William Wordsworth. Thanks to the human heart by which we live, thanks to its tenderness, its joys and fears, I don't have to enlarge on that. And how many of you know who Helen Keller was? Great. Here's a quote from her. I mean, she's just fabulous. I grew up very aware of Helen Keller because I grew up in Birmingham, Alabama, and she was... By the time I was a child, she was already an example for all of us.

[29:26]

But she is someone who, at 19 months old, had scarlet fever or meningitis, some illness which made her both deaf and blind. And she had a remarkable teacher who managed to... communicate with her sufficiently that later in life, Helen Keller was a prodigious writer and teacher. She had difficulty speaking because she couldn't hear. But she says, so much has been given to me, I have no time to ponder over that which has been denied. so much has been given to me, I have no time to ponder over that which has been denied. Fantastic woman. And she also said, when we do the best we can, we never know what miracle is wrought in our life or in the life of another.

[30:38]

When we do the best we can, we never know what miracle is wrought in our life or in the life of another. That, of course, reminds me of my lifelong koan. Suzuki Roshi said, Zen is to make your best effort on each moment forever. That's like doing the best we can. But he also said you should practice with no gaining idea. Because whenever you're entertaining a gaining idea, it means that you think... There's not enough here. I need to get more in order to be all right. So just practice for the sake of practice. Practice to allow the Buddha that you are to express itself in the world. To actually live with loving kindness and sympathetic joy and compassion and wisdom.

[31:46]

It's not that that's somewhere else and you've got to get it and add it to you. It's right here. It's your original endowment, as someone called it. So doing the best we can, we will cultivate those aspects of ourselves that are not sufficiently cultivated so that they can come to full expression. And this one is from Mariah Fenton Gladi. Tales of a Wounded Healer. Every time you express gratitude or compassion for any aspect of yourself or someone else, you breathe life in. Every time you express gratitude or compassion for any aspect of yourself or or someone else, you breathe life in.

[32:51]

So what I'm talking about today is cultivating in yourself I was going to say, it will never end until we die, I think. This cultivation, there's always room for improvement. There's always room to cultivate those aspects of life that you want to see more of in the world. If you want to see more kindness in the world, start here. If you want to see more love in the world, start here. If you want to see more patience in the world, start here. If you want to see kinder speech, start here. And let it move out from you in waves until it covers the earth. You know, we may as well have a...

[34:10]

big aspiration for how we want to live this life. There's no point in giving yourself a small and easy aspiration. Give yourself an aspiration that will encourage you for your whole life. And then ask your friends to help you. And you help your friends by being kind and honest with them. And if you see me doing some disparaging look, tell me right now, please. Okay? It's a deal? Thank you for listening to this podcast offered by the San Francisco Zen Center. Our Dharma talks are offered at no cost and this is made possible by the donations we receive.

[35:15]

Your financial support helps us to continue to offer the Dharma. For more information, visit sfcc.org and click giving. May we fully enjoy the Dharma.

[35:29]

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