Sesshin Lecture

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Day 1 Zendo Lecture


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somebody was somebody reminded me yesterday that
this was a
have you to be humming

hookers a new book right
for this

what you going


the things like do

i'm monday
have you got the one from sure that

much and
do something about the
yeah say
after i got it

i notice the fairway
tried to run
we're driving
one of them
one of them would rather car pretty the next girl was
look older
the beauty
you can be the third one is very very old very over
i didn't great it was that was leader
the thing when i going to strike me
around fukuda
and outside of that circle were or what i said to the new guinea
i really agree angry angry with
when they have here
we're going them
you go to prison
when i can relate to that
as paul was saying yesterday
once we'd be damned sexual we are in the midst of affliction
and anger and fear and
how those things
u s okay i just found my place thinking sorry grieve and hilton sadness
a fixed views and unlimited sense of self here where we keep we keep trying to put ourselves back in that little box that manageable little rocks and we keep looking out through our our prescription of conditioning that sees the world and a certain dependable and will be a crumbly unpleasant way
we keep from going back there i remember in counseling there was a an expression we use under stress we regress
so enough stress we try to fit ourselves back in that little has about to who who we think we are or were told we should be
so i knew that for what would i when i knew about that was the the with the demons my mind where were them
in fact with the author of my suffering was always somebody else and going is a skillful
through skillful tool it's kind of uses the pressure a little bit
but since it's not true
the president last long
what's what struck me about the teacher was that when the arrows and spears entered the circle they turned into our candles
and that i was so surprised to see that what was this guy doing it made the created that effect it because here with the spears and slings and arrows of outrageous fortune coming at him
and when they entered a certain field around him they turned into something as delicate gentle joyous
happy and as flower petals
and of several you know many years later the first time i was a city centre i came i got the courage to go there is a guest and the ceremony there was a special ceremony and it was buddhist enlightenment and i've never seen anything
it was a gigantic drum in the room which was i right and three years and then we started walking around a strange pattern and then and then people were throwing primer pedals up in the air and made me cry i've never seen anything so
sweet sweet suites are somehow as well
i never forgot that
and i remembered that picture
and thing that ceremony so
now now i know a little roar that some that time circle around the buddha oxo good of field
and that town
when the buddha finally awaken he was so happy and said oh my goodness
all beings are enlightened beings are free
they just don't know it how can i help and apparently which the story goes that decided couldn't try because we do too much the he would enjoy his own voice but then current better have a greater through advice from others i suspect to to try
to try to help there's a visit
lives as in
expression that i first saw in something ethereal wrote and talked about a zen teachers biggest grief biggest sadness and that was to see
to see the students flailing and flowers
flailing and flowers
if you picture it
picture person in a meadow surrounded by flowers and they're flailing when misery
isn't that
what what a contrast
but apparently that's that's how i run it's our room were immersed in suffering that
we can even in the midst of complete abject perfection and compassion we can still fail and our own of israel the misery of blackhawks
so in
the building a buddha field
when the tassajara is a british ale
i've just got a letter yesterday from somebody who is here
maybe last year from practice period and
and he
he remembered it being mentioned that than that we prepare a good of field for i guess to come into in the summer and he was touched by that and he so up a friend of hers who have gonna guess for thirty years and he asked her
is that if that's what she experienced and she said areas she feels that when she comes here the world is is all right that everything is being taken care of the way we come to the zendo all the time rain or shine as this right in the center when we can do they send out shine
that she feels that everything is taking care of and when she hears the noise that we make noises that we make thousand hangs on points somehow she feels very very comforted by that
i think one of the techniques that human beings have come up with
the to help them get in touch with the broader field is
to create sanctuaries
and i suspect that the first sanctuaries are either a circle drawn in the dirt or mind ring with ring of stones or fryer and a cave or
church or synagogue or tassajara
yeah it seems to be part of our nature to build sanctuaries
well we can go where we can have a create a good where we can create a buddha field and one of the things that sanctuaries have our ways of behaving when you're in them and i'm certainly not a harry is no exception and our our heritage from china and then certainly from
india with the you from china with the shingles
three japan to us lots of rules and regulations presets
i think from one point of view they that they can see things are constricted
but what they what they really do because they help us so that we can see clearly we can see clearly by i'm not going to places where are our vision is crowded
thing that found where if we kill our vision to see the truth about life is crowded if we live our vision to to the truth is clouded if we slander
our vision is crowded to see the building from in the really about it
the beauty in the profession or something
so we have all these things that help us be mindful of a way that will help us awaken the
and before you time
so good and apparently wondered how you could possibly keep such a thing
how does it what he didn't know
what's how calming his presence was few
read the in the early cause his his life and ministry in teaching
if they didn't take people wrong being around him for them to have got it through to have awaken my happy chevron says go to holding a power
so i think i think that probably helped a great deal
anybody who has a very calming presence i think is is a health but it seems to be one of the first requirements students somehow become come to slow down to become grounded in to touch the ground without a long slender fingers

the only thing that seems to be important is to know where the breath is as much as were taken
often we don't know you don't have to know because it breathes it our thank goodness can you imagine the corrupt as we have be conscious of your time we breathe it can students
what if we're going to take good daydream
what if we forgot
for thankfully we have a mechanism in our brain takes care of that for us
and thing about the breath is that did you are aware of creating your also in the present moment as infinitesimal is that it is and is unsteady and continually moving and changing as address
the criticism of secret
that's right it you can impact to the breath in order to settle
i read somewhere else that if if you are also aware of your peripheral vision for also present
for me i am able to use the rising and falling and my a which i find myself even notice
as as already crowned the i've become a still of planting these are
and so then once we get settled then we take the big load we take the big plunge into the merciful ocean a good as way
that that phrase or expression was always intrigued me
who would want to immerse themselves in any ocean
i'm sorry most of living you would i wouldn't it
the ocean is a and start on you can't create there
which he is very frightening i don't mind being as long as i don't have to
put anything arrived
so the idea of entering any ocean or that isn't present concept
however with have so much sorry
whether i like it not that's what happens when when we come here we enter the merciful ocean of food as way
and i was thinking about that
how do we do that especially somebody who has trouble with options
and i am an insane folks come here some people come maybe maybe most of us navy some of us but certainly mean i first came in a submarine
i don't know why i knew it was option is good to be prepared for anything so i had a submarine
and i entered entered the water and
yeah you know like in a movie you'll see that a drawing down
the the air going away
and so the submarine my suffering at i have done very thick skin
so let's fan wouldn't come implode
little keep the the unwanted
frightening out and there was a window in crime was a very thick
so fake fact that it distorted image that came for it
so that gum was always confirm that yeah was scary out there isn't it can now see i would say they are big ugly horrible scary things wherever i work course there were people and here and here are we even have measured like seen proxies and refuse
one of the capsules creative dishes to and then when you there's even a bear and brock cats
and course gay people
so what i found was that fun
maybe a couple of years later
and during during all that some not an accident
but in a couple of years apparently i traded in the submarine for one of those on for the fashioned diving suits
know the ones that from thick thick rubber i suspect good grass constant brass helmets
and and a link to the surface for air
i always i always have a way out i always have
a way to get what you thinking and this this the suit was very very heavy and but it was thick because of the thick as the submarine keep out the the danger but i did have a big thick grass plate in france was shot down distorted everything but not quite as much not quite as much
it it changed when i was seeing from the big awful horrible scary people to little geez maybe there are people like me maybe sawyer
so kind of things were softening
then in a couple of years i suspect i trade to bed and for a scuba outfit
which was i
i don't want actually have learned that made a couple of municipal cryogenic not necessary with the with so contains the things that were there
oxygen tanks but there was a will write lines in the surface and but still i the and face mask which distorted still distorted tough but i've seen
couple years later i got rid of the lifeline the eric the arrows and you gotta smuggle
so that i acknowledge this case of hours to see yeah
and from listening to talks paying the teachers they would be there will be telling me that know that submarine your in it's not real
who don't really need it
and going to lose the same as motivated
the diving suit
not really either
no worries as the scoop outfits not real because it really protect you from anything in fact if you look really close the papers last ah you can see
better it's all made up
from karma
the conditioning
and and that was difficult enough there was a part of it that was comforting what if it were true love grandpa flu
but there was an account that of going to run to dance
and sometimes they would even
had a grant could do it he could touch the side of the submarine or put his hand and threw it
which you
this is supposed to be
i not as others of course can do that didn't take much actually does it
has a little contact
how each of our son has has come here of all places
i remember talking listening to somebody who are talking about how they felt rather kind of guilty of that term but their life hadn't been so bad
and that they were living in a place like this while other people are suffering so much
outside side and
dogan makes a big point over and over again that you're here because of your karma
each of us is here because of our karma that kratom something something very good must have been done for us to didn't care because this this whole environment is this going to field theme park where we've set it up so that we can we can the most help you could ever get
beginning to a clear division
so we can see what's actually going on
some some of us and
for some with high lives and it's all relatives are here because of karma those with i'm relatively comfortable lives i here because of karma and subset of blame ourselves one way or the other doesn't really can never i don't think really hit department
so we're all here like most good fortune
to study to enter into mass production with his way
who know
when someone wanted to say
i just been turned over the page and
and down
except for one thing
i am i not not a correct but i did write perhaps there's something told me it was a problem and it's time for change during the the constantly encouraging the encouraging words
rod secession last year so you don't mind
we're excited
for greeted
here we are each of us tiny months sitting on our chinese offers whom this tiny building
nestled in this tiny valley
on the edge of this tiny planet
somewhere in a rather small galaxy
rating for the morningstar
when the whole universe awakens to its own heart each one bus
no recognition