Good morning, and welcome to the San Francisco Zen Center, also known as Beginner's Mind Temple. And it's great to see so many people here this morning. My name is Daigaku Rume. I am a resident here at 300 Page, but I'm kind of coming to the end of my stay here. I arrived here almost exactly to the day, seven years ago. And the wildly spinning compass needle of my life this past year finally seems to be settled towards south. I'm headed towards L.A. next month, and that's one of the reasons I'm speaking today. Right, Blanche? Blanche Hartman, I'd like to thank Blanche Hartman, our, well, I think of you as the matriarch, Blanche. She was supposed to be speaking today, and she very graciously and kindly... offered to let me speak today. So thank you, Blanche, Jordan, Paul, and everybody.

[01:02]

I'd like to speak today about Sesshin. And Sesshin is a very important part of our practice here in Zen Center and also in Zen practice overall. And that's something that's going to begin tonight, I believe, for one week, a week-long practice. And so I am well aware, however, that some of you may have never even heard the word before. Is that correct? Yes, good. I want to see the hands. And don't be shy. Don't be shy. This is Beginner's Mind Temple. We welcome those people who have never heard about Zen before. So I want to see those hands who have never heard about Sesshin before. Once again, just to have a little idea there. Great, great. Thanks. It's great to have new people here. But I'd like to do that in the context of Buddhism, just to give you a little, you know, context and also Zen practice as well.

[02:06]

And then what I'd like to do also is to speak a little bit about my own experience in Japan. I spent many years in a Japanese monastery to talk just a little bit about the similarities and the differences of Sesshin in both places. So that's my plan. And, well, gee. It's great to be here. I hope you enjoy it. Buddhism, of course, I know you all know this, is the teaching of Shakyamuni Buddha. At least that's where it began. And I'd like to speak a little bit about the Buddha because his life and his experience is so important in terms of what we're trying to do as well. And he lived about 2,500 years ago. He was born a prince in India. And he had everything he wanted, material and more.

[03:09]

But even though he had all of those things, those material things, that was not enough to keep away a question, that question which had probably been with him since he was younger. And that question was, had to do with human suffering. And how could he bring an end to human suffering? And I think that's a question a lot of us have. How could we really bring an end to the suffering in my life? Well, that's the question he had. And typically we say in Buddhism there is birth, death, old age, and sickness. These are said to be the four basic sufferings of human life. Those are the sufferings none of us are going to escape. But I'd like to mention the other four, too. We say there are four and eight basic sufferings. The other four are always being separate from people you love. Underline always. And second, always.

[04:13]

Having to live, study, work, whatever, with people you hate. Yeah, it's true. Underline always. It's true. Thirdly, never being able to find what you're seeking for, no matter how much you seek for. Just think about that. And lastly, that this thing, often called the human body and mind, is like a vessel, a container, that just keeps collecting suffering. That's the bad news. That's the human condition. The good news is, Shakyamuni Buddha did find a way to bring it into human suffering. And that's why we're here, to do it for ourselves. Not just to hear about it, not just to read about it, but to verify that this here, this thing here, is the Buddha.

[05:14]

That we already have everything we're looking for. But it was no easy thing for the Buddha to do that. He didn't just wake up one morning and think, well, you know, I've got the answer. I'll read a book or listen to a CD or whatever. No, he didn't. But he was compelled, we think, at the age of 29, more or less, to leave behind his responsibilities. And he had a bunch of them. He was a father. He had a son. He had a wife. parents, countrymen. He was responsible to all of those peoples in various different ways, and he was compelled to leave behind those responsibilities. Think how hard that would be even in terms of your own life. Right? But he did that, and off he went, and he went, he shaved off his hair, his beard, and so on, and he went to study with the best teachers of his day.

[06:28]

And at that time, and even now in India as well, it's ascetic practice that really is the main practice. And the idea of ascetic practice is that by harming the body or maybe upsetting it or disturbing it in various ingenious ways, and that includes the mind as well, that it would be possible to overcome that grasping, dissatisfied self, sometimes called the ego. And he did that so wholeheartedly for a couple of years or more. that later on he said nobody, past, present, or future, would ever do ascetic practice as wholeheartedly as he had, which is quite a statement. Remember, that was 2,500 years ago. And in India, I believe, they're still dreaming up ways of doing ascetic practice. But he said, I did it all. And even though he did it all, he realized that that was not going to give him the answer he was looking for. And so once again, he was compelled to change course.

[07:34]

And he left behind his teachers. He left behind his colleagues. And he was forced to go off on his own. Again, this is tremendously difficult to do this. And he said, what we now call Zazen, he didn't know that word, Zazen. But he did that. He sat with that question of human suffering. And how can I bring an end to human suffering for a relatively long time, several years? But in the process of doing that, he really just wrung himself out like a limp rag. That's how I think of it. He forgot himself in that practice of wrestling with that question. And then it happened. One morning he was looking up. It was at dawn, right? You know the story. He saw the morning star, the light of the morning star. The light of the morning star and Shakyamuni Buddha became one. At that instant. And in essence, this was his awakening.

[08:37]

His enlightenment, if you wish. His realization that all along there never had been a separate self. That there is no separate self. That there is a self that is never born. And never dies. And never grows old. And never gets sick. That's our reality. He realized that everything is fundamentally one. So that's a little bit of the context of our practice. Because it's in practice. At least I believe. There are differences in opinion, by the way. But I believe is to verify that for ourselves. That we also have that basic oneness. We are part of that oneness. That we are, that this is the Buddha.

[09:45]

This. Seeing, hearing, smelling, tasting, touching, thinking. That that, if we could leave those sense functions work automatically, that that would be a Buddha. But the fact is we simply cannot do that. And we might be able to accept that everything is perfect as it is because Buddhism is a teaching that presents the results right at the beginning. Everything is perfect right now as it is. That you are the Buddha. But the thing is, we don't know that, right? Come on, guys. Nod your head. You don't know that. You haven't experienced it. Or if you know it, it's not enough. You've got to verify it. It's one thing to read about it. It's another thing to really experience it. And so Zen practice is about verifying it for yourself. And Sesshin, this practice that I've been mentioning, that we're going to begin tonight. Actually, I'm not doing it myself, but there are... How do they write that?

[10:50]

Just true disclosure or whatever. Well, some people are. I do seshin when I can and so on and so on. But anyway, a certain number of people are going to be doing that. And that's the idea of seshin, to really focus your mind, right? To simplify your life so that you've got a whole lot of time to sit. And zazen isn't just a matter of sitting. Zazen is to be the thing itself, to be this reality itself without interfering. So regardless of whether you're walking, washing dishes, eating, chanting sutras, the idea of seshin is really to be that activity. So we simplify our lives. And it's really a great luxury. And I encourage all of you. I know there are many of you here who come here every Saturday and you hear about seshin and so on.

[11:51]

But I really strongly encourage you to make that time. To make that time. It's a great luxury. It's not easy. It's not easy. But it's designed to help you focus. To really bring the focus of your life right here, right now. There are said to be three essential elements of Zen practice. And all of these elements of practice are sufficiently present in seshin. So this is another reason we do seshin. Those three elements are to ask a teacher. about the Dharma. The Dharma is the word that I use, can be used to talk about the Buddhist teaching in general. It could be used to talk about this basic oneness of all things. In any case, we have to hear about it. That's one thing. Secondly, the actual practice of Zazen. And thirdly, the precepts.

[12:53]

And I was thinking to myself, the theme of this practice period that we're doing right now, these two months right now, sila, samadhi, and prajna. Well, at least two of them are represented there. I'm sure the third one is there somehow. We'll fit it in there somehow. Sila, that's the precepts. And samadhi, that oneness with your practice, that's zazen. That's the practice of zazen. And prajna, well, as far as I'm concerned, that's the end result. That's what we're... really doing the session all about. That's what it's all about, right? To awaken to that perfection of all things right now. So I'd like to speak a little bit about those three elements, to ask a teacher, or I prefer the word master. It's very, very important for us to have access to somebody that we can ask about the Dharma, the teaching. Otherwise, we won't really know if we're going in the right direction. And there are many, many teachers here.

[13:57]

It's just very, very important. It's not enough just to read about the teaching. Because invariably, questions will arise. And it's important for us to ask somebody those questions and get the good answers. I encourage you to go to someone that you really feel you're getting your satisfactory answers. And even if you do get good answers. It's very, very likely that that will simply be the seed for more questions. So this is something that could take some time. It's a process where you figure out, well, what's Zazen all about anyway? It's not enough just to go and sit facing the wall. Be quiet. Just sit. We say Zazen is a practice of a Buddha, but that's not enough. You've got to know what's going on there. So I really encourage you. as a matter of getting involved in this practice of, we say, listening to the teaching, thinking about it, you know, really using the old rational mind.

[15:03]

Well, what does that mean? What does that mean, that zazen is a practice of a Buddha? Could you please tell me what that means? And then you get the answer right. And that'll probably get... some more wheels going and so on, but anyway, as an example. And then when you really know what practice is all about, you can just dive into it and go straight. And you won't be worrying about, well, am I doing it correctly? Or how long is it going to take? Or what's going to happen as a result of practice anyway? Imagine you're out on the ocean. You know, you have a friend in Sausalito. You're going to go out for a little spin on Sunday on a boat. And then you start talking. And he says, well, I've got two, three weeks worth of food here. We could make a Tahiti. And yeah, well, okay, if you say so.

[16:05]

But you didn't have a compass. You didn't have one. I don't know what these things are called, where you find your position by the stars. You didn't have a sea shark. But you just had that idea you were going to go to Tahiti. No, that would not be a good idea, probably. It's very easy to go around and around, you know, once you get out there and, well, the stars and all that, you have the sun and all that. But at least I believe, I'm using this as an analogy, that it's very easy to go in circles. Or if you're, I've done this several times, you hike from Big Sur to Tassajara, through the Ventana, the wilderness. Last time I went, my friend had GPS even. We still almost got lost. But imagine you didn't have GPS. You didn't have a map. You didn't have a compass. Again, it would be very, very easy just to go round and around, lost. You don't want to do that. No. That's the same in Zen practice. That's why I'm making this pitch for getting the right information.

[17:08]

Make sure you're going in the right direction. Otherwise, you might be going in the wrong direction. No. The second... the essential element of practice, the practice of zazen. Call it samadhi. That's to be the thing itself. That's to eliminate that sense of separation between good old me and the activity. Right? Just to come so close to it that you forget that you're even doing that activity. That's samadhi. That's zazen. It doesn't matter what the activity is. But it's relatively easier if you're just sitting facing a wall. No telephones, no computers, no this, no that. All those things that we usually are wondering and thinking about. You just have the good old wall in front of you.

[18:09]

That's called just sitting. Or as my teacher likes to say, just warming the cushion. That's easy for about 15 seconds. Yeah, 15 seconds. That's not enough. You're going to be doing that a whole week. Then the old mind kicks in. So, you know, you've got to have, you know, how are you going to work with that? So that's Zazen. You want to talk to the teacher about that. And thirdly, the precepts. The precepts on one level are the guidelines of our life, the things that help us keep our attention right here. Because, as I said, whatever we're looking for is right in front of us, right in front of our eyes. They keep us from always looking over there or over there. And we have that tendency. The grass always seems to be a little greener somewhere else, not right in front of you. That's what you're looking for, right in front of you. And those precepts help you, you know, just rein in that restless monkey mind.

[19:14]

On another level, the precepts is our reality. If we would simply stop interfering with things as they are, that would be it. If we were anxious, for example, we could just be completely anxious and not even worry about it. Or if we were depressed, yeah, it's okay. Confused, but we can't do that. Nope. If we're anxious, right away we're looking for something to help us get through that anxiety, right? Maybe some medicine or, gee, whatever, something to eat, drink, you know. People can't do that. But that's one of the secrets of Zen. If you're anxious, be completely anxious. That's the only way to bring an end to anxiety. If you're confused, don't worry about it. It's okay.

[20:17]

It's going to change. Everything is impermanent. So in Zazen, that's one thing we work with. It's leaving things as they are. Just sitting. And then forgetting just, because just, that's an idea. Just sitting, that's pointing to that thing where there's nothing. And that's what you want. That's the Dharma. And I'd like to talk a little bit about that later on. Okay, so I'd like to talk a little bit about, anyway, those three things are in plentiful supply, it says she. The teachers to ask about the Dharma, the actual practice of Zazen, it's all designed to help you do that, right? To keep you focused on what you're doing. And lastly, the precepts. You know, you're not going to be talking to your friends, gossiping and this and that. We don't speak during sessions. So that just lets a whole lot of stuff go, right?

[21:20]

And we're just going to be thinking about nothing, right? So that takes care of that. And, you know, all of those other things to get you into trouble, well, you can't do those either. So that's why Sesshin is great for really just keeping you here. Once again, I'm making a plug for Sesshin. I'd like to talk a little bit about Sesshin in Japan. I think many of you know that this practice, not that long ago, about 50 years ago, in fact, wasn't it last year we celebrated the 50th anniversary of Suzuki Shunyu, who is the founder of this particular Zen Center, came from Japan. It's not that long ago, if you think in terms of history, right? But this is a practice that did come from Japan, and there are similarities and there are differences. I'd like just to mention a few of them, just to give you a little... background information. At the monastery where I was, we had six seshin every year.

[22:24]

In the good old days, they were a week long, but then at a certain point, because of various circumstances, they were shortened to five days, except for Rohat seshin. Rohat seshin is typically the most intense and longest seshin that's usually in December, and it's... synchronized, I guess, with the day that we celebrate the Buddha's enlightenment. And that is still a week long at the monastery where I went. I spent time. We had many guests come in to join us for Sesshin, as happens here. Oftentimes there were 30 or 40 guests, so we would have maybe 60 people sitting with us, a good-sized group of people. When I first started going there, My master did not speak. He did not give a daily formal talk like we have here. I think it's every day, right? We have a formal talk. He preferred to speak extemporaneously in the zendo, short talks in the zendo.

[23:34]

And the other main way of seeing him and talking to him would be in doksan, this one-to-one interview where you get to speak to him directly. and ask him about your practice, or make sure that you're really going in the right direction. However, after I was there for some years, he did take on that practice of giving formal tesho, this about hour-long talk. That was every other day he did that. And right now, he's not speaking. Once again, he has stopped speaking, doing those. He says, we all know enough. We know too much. So he stopped talking again, and who knows, maybe he'll start talking again. Anyway, so there's that. There are some similarities. So if you went there, I think if you were used to doing the schedule here, you would fit in quite easily. There are many of the forms that we do are the same. We got up at 4 in the morning and sat until 9 at night. One difference, however, is that we were encouraged to sit after 9 o'clock in the evening. And I think that may be the case here, but we were really strongly encouraged to do that, if you felt well.

[24:41]

If you were not well, of course, well, go to bed. But to take your practice and do it, just continue a little bit more on your own. Take that practice and sit another hour. And then you wouldn't be bothered by bells and doing kin-hin and all of those things. And so that's, I would say, one difference, that we were encouraged to sit as much as possible. And some people would sit, believe it or not, all night. So there was that. Meals, work, and all that I think was quite similar. I think that's about all I want to say, except for one thing that always struck me. And I really don't know if this is true here or not. But invariably, at the end of Sashin, my teacher would give a talk. This would be about noon on the last day. just before we would have lunch, and that would be the end of Sashin. For those people who were returning home, so imagine you were a lay person who had come for Sashin, and you were going to go home.

[25:44]

Invariably, he would say, forget about Sashin when you go home. Forget about the monastery. And when you get home, you do your work 100%. That's Zen. Otherwise, We have an expression for this. If you're trying to do the computer as if you were doing it in a Zen-like way, well, I'm going to try and do this in a Zen-like way. Answer the phone in a Zen-like way. We have an expression for that, and that is to put another head on top of the one you already have. We only need one head. And so you've got two heads. No, don't do that. Forget about Zen. Do your work completely. That is Zen. or your family life. When you're in that activity, do it 100%. That's not to say that if you have time every day to sit quietly, go ahead and do it. But don't try and don't walk around with T-shirts that say, I'm a Zen student or whatever, you know.

[26:49]

Forget about it. Forget about it. Just do your everyday life 100%. I thought I would tell you that. I think that's... I just like that teaching, especially if you're a lay person. I'm kind of coming to the end of my talk. I'd like to leave you with a story from China. I'm very fond of these stories from China. Even before Zen was Japanese, it was Chinese. Yes. Good old China. A lot of those stories that we talk about Zen come from China. This is a story that dates from about mid-9th century. Rinzai Zenji died, I believe, in 868, something like that. That predates Dogen Zenji about 350 years or so. Story about Rinzai Zenji. He was about to die. He knew it at the end of his life. He called his top disciple Sancho.

[27:51]

And he said, Sancho, When I die, don't let my treasury of the true Dharma I, that's the Shobo Genza, by the way, my Dharma, don't let my Dharma die. And Sancho said, don't worry about it. Don't worry. We won't let your Dharma be destroyed. And Rinzai said, well, if someone asks you about it, what are you going to say? And Sancho immediately shouted, ah! Something like that. And Rinzai said, who would have thought that this blind donkey would have destroyed my Dharma? And it is said that he died peacefully. And this is what I'd like to offer to you people today. It's just an idea.

[28:54]

that our, as Zen students, as Zen practitioners, our duty, our duty or objective, maybe that's a better word, our objective is really to make the Dharma our own. That's what session is about. To make the Dharma your own. But that means destroying it. In the sense of assimilating it. In the sense of being so close to it that nothing remains. Neither you nor the Dharma. Because if anything remains, that's the self. That's the ego. We've got to get to that place where there's nothing. And that's what's meant by this story. That Sancho had completely assimilated his master's Dharma to the extent that it no longer existed. Dogen talks about this as well. He said everybody has

[29:56]

the Dharma nature, everybody, up. We have plenty. But without practice, without Zen practice, it isn't manifested. Without verification, without really verifying it for ourselves that this is the Buddha, that we are the Dharma, it isn't attained. And I really think this is the direction we have to go. We have to make the Dharma our own. This is no easy thing to do, by the way. It's not enough just to sit there. This metaphor came to me the other day. I was speaking at USF. So here's these students. They're going to go off and do a Zen retreat somewhere. And I said, well, if you're sitting on a Zafru, these round cushions, and you have your hands like this, and you're looking at the wall, does that mean you're a Buddha? We say that Zazen is the practice of a Buddha. Does that make you a Buddha? and I saw a couple heads faintly shaking their head no, and I said, that's right.

[31:01]

That's right. And this metaphor came to my mind. Imagine you had a paintbrush in your hand, and a beret, and an easel, and a canvas, and a palette of paints. Does that make you a painter? Well, you might have aspirations to be a painter, but that doesn't mean you can do something nice on that canvas. It's going to take some practice, right? some teaching. Or if you're a basketball player, just to have a basketball in your hand. And even if you had your Nikes on and all of that, does that make you a basketball player? Well, you might be able to fumble around with it, but if you got out on the court with people who now knew how to play, no. They would leave you in the dust. And if you wanted to be a basketball player, that would require practice, training. You would need that aspiration. You would need people to help you and coach you. And that's what we come together for in the Sangha, to get all those things.

[32:03]

But still, it's going to take aspiration on your part. We say that Zazen is the practice of a Buddha. It is the practice of a Buddha. A Buddha doesn't seek for anything, doesn't seek for enlightenment, and doesn't try to get rid of delusion. A Buddha is able to leave everything just for As it is. A Buddha is in samadhi. But remember, a person who knows they're in samadhi is not in samadhi. No. Zazen. The practice of a Buddha is to come so close to Zazen that you forget about the Dharma. That you forget about Zazen. That you are completely yourself as you are. Thanks so much for listening. I hope you have a great day.

[33:06]

There will be time later. I'm not a Zen master, but there will be time later for questions, comments. I always like comments, too. I always say we don't have to agree on every single thing. So if you have more questions, please come and let's talk about it. But I hope you have a great day. This is the beginning of spring.

[33:24]

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