Good evening. I'm here at Tassajara this week with a group of practitioners who've made a year's commitment to practice together and the name of the program is Deepening Engagement in the Path of Practice. And all these practitioners have received the Buddha's precepts, Bodhisattva initiation, or are working towards that, are preparing. So this five-day retreat together is something we've been planning for over a year, and I'm very happy to be here with this group. What we're studying for the five days is a particular Can everybody hear okay?

[01:00]

It's okay? A piece of writing which was a letter to a lay practitioner, a lay student of the Zen master Dogen, and the name of this, it became a part of a larger work, it's called the Genjo Koan, or actualizing the fundamental point, actualizing the fundamental point, which is our job, our task in this life. So although we're working on this together, studying it, I just wanted to bring up one line of the Genjo Koan and then bring something else up that I've been really wanting to explore myself, so I'll explore it with you.

[02:06]

The line in the Genjo Koan is, yet in attachment blossoms fall, and in aversion weeds spread. I just received a phone call from home from my husband that the office took the call and let me know that my mother-in-law is dying. And so I talked with my husband, Steve, and we'll call him after the lecture to see if there's time for him to go back tonight, or I'm not sure. So I just wanted... somehow this line, yet an attachment blossoms fall and in aversion weeds spread. This is our human life.

[03:11]

We love and, you know, over and over again try to hold to that which is not graspable, that which is impossible to hold to. And in that blossoms fall. Those things that we love and delight in will change and perish. And at the same time in our aversion, in our disattachment or not caring so much, other things grow and flourish like weeds. This is a kind of superficial look at those lines as you look deeper as we look deeper one can ask you know what's the difference between a flower and a weed really I think our wildflower group you know sometimes somebody might call that a weed if you found it in your garden but on the mountainside it's a flower so this

[04:28]

shifting and appearing and disappearing in different forms and our human tendency to like and dislike and attach and avert. How do we have compassion for ourselves and for each other as we struggle with this, as we practice with this? So my mother-in-law is 95. We just came back. We spent Mother's Day in New Jersey. So in some ways it feels very complete. Her entire family with four great-grandchildren were all there. And it was complete. Today somebody read me a poem that they wrote.

[05:31]

Somebody who's... returned to Tassajara after having lived here and returning for this workshop about the feeling, the presence of so many people who have been here, who have practiced here, who have lived here and almost like a ghost-like, Holy Ghost-like presence And someone else mentioned seeing people on the path, having not been here in a while, feeling like, oh, is that so-and-so? No, that was another time, another place in my life, another time in my life. Those people aren't here, but feeling their presence. This is what it feels like to come home. So I wanted to bring up a koan that is...

[06:34]

from the collection, the Mumankan, which is a collection of 48 koans. This is number 35. And this particular koan is called Seijo and her soul are separated. Seijo and her soul are separated. And this story was a Chinese folk tale a Chinese legend or ghost story almost from the Tang Dynasty and it was included because a Zen master took this Zen master Go So Ho and took this particular legend and felt it conveyed something of Dharma teaching that he wanted his students to work with. And it speaks to me and we'll see if it speaks to you.

[07:35]

Seijo and her soul are separated. So I'll tell you it's a story. So get ready for a story. And then we'll look at it on the level of story and the motifs maybe or conventionally what's happening in the story and how it might relate to our lives and then we'll go and look at the Dharma teaching that's there. So once upon a time there was a family in China and the father of the family's name was Cho Khan and there were two daughters in this family but the eldest daughter died And the youngest daughter, whose name was Se, or Sejo, Jo means girl, they called her Sejo, she was very beautiful and her family doted upon her because she was the only child now.

[08:41]

And she was cherished. And the family was an extended family. Living in the family was a nephew of the father, or Sejo's cousin, who was He was orphaned, and so he was being raised in this family. And in a joking way, as these things sometimes happen, the father said when they were little, because they kind of grew up together, oh, you two are so well matched, you get along so well, you're going to be betrothed when you're older. And hearing that, both of them thought, we're going to be together. And they loved each other very much. and felt they were meant for each other. Well the father had said that in jest and as Seijo got older she had many suitors but her heart belonged to Ochu, her cousin, her nephew, her father's nephew and it was probably once a removed cousin, not her first cousin.

[09:52]

So she had many suitors and her father chose a suitor that he felt was appropriate for her and just announced to her that she was betrothed to this other person in the village. And Ochu was stunned and she was very unhappy and Ochu couldn't bear seeing her married to this fellow and so secretly he just left the village one night. and got in a boat and was heading down the river that ran by the village well long about midnight he heard some rustling on the banks of the river and saw a shadowy figure running along the banks and he pulled over to see what it was and lo and behold it was Seijo and she they hugged each other and they were crying they said we can't go back home and let's go to a remote village and be together as we were meant to be.

[10:57]

And they left together and went to a faraway village and were married and lived there. And after five years they had two children and had a life, you know, in this village. But one day Seijo said to Ochu, you know, I'm happy here with you and I love you and the children but I'm longing to see my family. I'm longing to be home. And I feel we've done dishonor to my family by leaving in this way. So let's go back." And he said, I've been feeling the same way. A lot of time has passed. Let's go back. Maybe they'll forgive us. So they loaded the kids into a boat and they packed up their house and they headed back to the village. So they got to the kind of harbor of the village and Ochu said, let me go first and speak with your father Chokhan and see if they've forgiven us and you wait here with the kids.

[12:04]

So she agreed and Ochu went and found the house and there was the father there and he said, please forgive us, your daughter ran away to be with me and we've married we have a family and children and we want to come home and Chokhan was completely baffled he said well this can't be true the night you disappeared the night you left the village Seijo took to her bed as if in a stupor she hasn't said a word In five years she's been sick and lying in bed. And Ochu said, you're wrong. Seijo's been with me. She's my wife. We have these children. And come down to the port and you'll see she's waiting there.

[13:07]

So the father sent an old servant to go down and check it out. And he came back and he said, it's Seijo. She's there. So Chokhan went into the bedroom and there was Seijo lying in bed, unable to speak, as if in a stupor, as if drugged it says in the story. And Chokhan told her the whole story, that there was this Seijo, another Seijo had shown up with her husband and Ochu and the children and he told her the whole story. Seijo in hearing this felt she looked like she was delighted she got up out of her bed first time in five years and went out the door and just at that moment a cart coming up from the porch was bringing the other Seijo and her kids and the two of them saw each other and with a delighted look on her face the Seijo who had been in bed walked towards the

[14:16]

the other Seijo and the two of them became one. Well Chokhan and everybody couldn't believe it and Seijo herself said, I myself am not sure which was the real me. The one lying in bed sick for five years? or the one with Ochu as a wife and mother. I myself am not sure which was the real one. And Zen Master Goso said, Seijo and her soul were separated. Which one was the true Seijo? Which one was the real one? So that's the koan, and that's my question to you. Which one was the real one?

[15:17]

Which Seijo was the real one? The one who couldn't speak at home sick or this other one? And the one who went away said, I followed Ochu as if in a dream and joined him as if in a dream. Did you like the story? So this is one of the koans that's called a Nanto koan which is offered for a student to work on to clarify differentiation and open their Zen eye, it says, within differentiation or the myriad appearances. And the poem that Muman who collected these koans, his poem is Ever the same, the moon among the clouds.

[16:22]

Different from each other, the mountain and the valley. How wonderful, how blessed. Is there one or is there two? Ever the same, the moon among the clouds. Different from each other, the mountain and the valley. wonderful how blessed is there one or is there two so in looking at this together the motifs of the folk tale or of the legend you know we have this young girl born into a family with a lot of you know, in studying it, you know, her sister had died. So there's a lot of strong karmic patterns.

[17:26]

The family ecology, you know, she became really focused on, you know. So there's that element of the story. There's also, she has very little agency, right, as Tang Dynasty, young woman, her father, basically, dictated who her husband would be and how she would act in the society. And for many of us, we've been born into families with very strong karmic meaning, habitual patterns, conditions that are very strongly going in one direction that pressure us And we also have, we feel, you know, to be divided, to feel divided, to feel we want to do one thing but are not able to, or we've made vows to act and live in a certain way and we find we're unable to.

[18:36]

We've made commitments and we feel sometimes, just like Sejo, divided or kind of living in a dream maybe, up in our heads all the time, not aware of our bodies, our feet on the ground. I think also like Sejo, these cultural pressures that we feel social, cultural, gender, sexual orientation, all these things that we feel so conditioned by. and divided, and maybe distance, maybe we've distanced ourselves from our true self or our lively, authentic self. We feel cut off from that. Which one is the real Seijo?

[19:38]

So some of the other motifs in the story Seijo follows her bliss maybe she goes with her lover but she says at the end it was like in a dream and sometimes we may do something that's against all our social conditioning and yet or seeking pleasure or seeking following whims of wanting and craving and thirsting after something and we just follow that thinking that will meet my innermost longing for wholeness or that will take care of this empty feeling I have. But actually after a time it wasn't enough.

[20:49]

She began to long for home, right? She wanted, and I think this motif in the story is wanting to complete. She was separated from things that were important to her, and parts of her life she had abandoned and jettisoned. And it worked for a while, but she ran away, you know. This longing, wanting to go home, longing for home, is something we may feel in our own lives, longing for wholeness, wanting to come back to something true and authentic. So they come home, they come home, and then they find out There's been this split, you know, this deep split.

[21:50]

And one of the motifs of the story that I find very interesting is when the sejo that's sick and has no words, when she hears that this other sejo has come, she's animated, you know, and she gets up out of her sick bed and she's delighted. Another version says, when they see each other she smiles. And there's something, actually when I first heard the story I just got chills up and down my spine when they smiled at each other and then came together. And so I want to come back to this smile. I know my time's running out, I've got a minute. The Tanto said, you know, everybody is working very hard and wants to get up in the morning so I'll probably have to leave this half done. So let me skip to the Dharma teachings here.

[22:55]

There's more to say about these kind of conventional motifs and how they might resonate with me or you. So the teachings, you know, of not one, not two. So the poem is, you know, ever... the same. The moon above the clouds. The moon, it just came out. I just saw it. The moon has been shining, right? It hasn't stopped shining. We just haven't seen it in a couple days. Ever the same. The moon above the clouds. Whether it's waxing or waning, it's the moon. And the moonlight shining down. This sameness. And this sameness we all share. The moon shines on everybody equally. Or the sameness of our life or the fact that we all are equal in our interdependent nature, that we are not separate substantial entities but that each one of us exists in the same way as empty of own being or without an abiding separate self.

[24:12]

This is shining This is our equality. And this is also Genjo Koan. And then the second line, different from each other, the mountain and the valley, it looks like, it appears to be, you know, climbing a mountain is very different from going down into a valley, right, in terms of shin splints, which I now have. these appearances are unique mountains and valleys and each one of us and cats and tables and each thing is completely unique and it appears and it looks like it's different you know and yet if we stay with the poem the moon is shining equally on all the mountains and the valleys so in even though they appear to be even though each one of us appears

[25:16]

as a separate unique phenomena, we are equal in the fact that we are completely supported and connected to one another. Whether we know it or not, you know, Seijo said, I myself did not know about this other one. So we have, sometimes we say, not one, not two is the closest you can describe how it is that we exist together. It kind of looks like one in our interdependent one fabric of life flowing, and yet, if you look carefully, each thing is completely unrepeatable, appearing and disappearing.

[26:17]

moment by moment. Is it one or is it two? Are we one or are we two? And when Seijo, the sick Seijo, the one who wasn't speaking, hears about this other Seijo and goes to meet her, she's delighted and this smile. And what it reminded me of is the transmission story of Shakyamuni Buddha and his successor, Makakasho Dayosho, Makashapya. And the world-honored one, the Buddha was sitting on Vulture Peak, and he had a flower in his hand. And he was kind of twirling the flower and winked. And Makakasho smiled. And that was the transmission. That was their Dharma transmission. He became the successor with the fine eye of Nirvana.

[27:20]

So that smile reminded me, Seijo's smile reminded me of this transmission of not one, not two, not separate, and yet uniquely ourselves. And they're coming together with joy, you know. how wonderful how blessed is it one or is it two which one is the real Seijo and for our lives which if we feel divided how are we going to realize our not one not two and I would suggest that as someone asked me today what's the basic Zen practice And we kind of worked it out together. And I'll suggest this to you. Sit down. Be quiet.

[28:24]

And do each thing that is before you with love and wholeheartedness. And I don't know if there's anything left out. Now you might say, that's it? What about all these other things to realize? This is realizing not one, not two. Okay. We have like three minutes before I'm supposed to put my hands in ga sha. So does anyone have a question or anything they'd like to add? No questions?

[29:34]

I just wanted to mention one thing that I found very beautiful actually that I just read in a lecture of Suzuki Roshi's and I forgot to say it at this event that I was invited to be at a prayer breakfast and talk about Zen and prayer and I was going to tell this story and I completely forgot to tell this story so I'm going to tell you even though this is not a prayer breakfast the origin you know we do our full bows and our bows those of you who practice and have come to service it's a full prostration with the head the forehead hitting the ground or not hitting it I hope placed on the ground and the origin of that according to this lecture of Suzuki Roshi's was back in the time of Shakyamuni Buddha there was a woman who did not have means she did not have anything that she could give the Buddha

[30:45]

She had nothing to give the Buddha. She was very poor. And so the Buddha was coming into the village and she got down on her knees and put her forehead on the ground and put her hair, her long hair, out on the ground for the Buddha to walk on. And that was her gift to the Buddha. That was what she could offer. And that was the origin of the bow. this this kind of full prostration and I found that so beautiful and you know in our bows we can express this not one not two this complete generosity of giving of ourselves in our unique way with all beings. Thank you very much.

[31:55]

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