This podcast is offered by the San Francisco Zen Center on the web at www.sfcc.org. Our public programs are made possible by donations from people like you. Good morning to you who are online, or good afternoon, or good evening. Good afternoon. I was watching the jisha, you know, who paused until I had bowed and during the bow pushed the whatever this is called, pushed it into place. And I was thinking, we didn't have that formality in the past. And then my notion is that someone did it one day, and then someone else did it the next time, and lo and behold, it's become a standard.

[01:16]

Maybe if you don't do it, you've got it wrong. Maybe the Eno will contact you afterwards. That very human way, we're trying to live our lives. We're trying to make them work, whatever that means. I often think we have the intention, but we haven't quite figured out what we're talking about. For this talk, I had thought to talk about Anapanasati. We're going to have a sushin soon, and that's what I had thought.

[02:18]

Is that okay? How about now? Is that okay? Yeah. I had thought to talk about Anapanasati. We're going to have a sushin soon. And then someone told me, well, today's the official start of our Zen-a-thon, which is a wonderful word. We made it up. I think the first person to do it, Myles Kohard, made up the word and made up the process. And now it's standard. So that's what I'll talk about. The Zen world, as I experience it, is very interesting.

[03:28]

People like it when you do what you're told. And yet, along with doing what you're told, there is be yourself. Discover yourself. So, in the service of being myself, I would like to talk about a certain phrase. that we chant when we do formal eating in the Zendo or Yoki. We say, and realize the emptiness of the three wheels, giver, receiver, and gift. And I'm going to talk about this

[04:32]

in the service of upholding the tradition that Miles initiated, the Zenathon. Initially, my first thought was, but wait a minute, I have already figured out what I'm going to do. And it appeals to me more. And then somehow that phrase came into my mind. Realize the emptiness of the three wheels. Giver, receiver, and gift. And then it cast my mind into, well, am I just doing what I want to do? Or...

[05:35]

Am I responding to the request of the Maha Sangha, of the fundraising office, of carrying forth Miles' tradition? Realize the emptiness of the three wheels. Maybe you could ask yourself right now, before I launch into my notion as to what all that means, or one way, one meaning it can have. Maybe you would ask yourself, what do you think it means to say, realize the emptiness of the three wheels, giver, receiver, and gift? And here's my version.

[06:41]

We're realizing, in the process of realizing, we don't figure something out. Not to say that thinking doesn't have a role to play in it, but it's more like we have an aha moment Or maybe it's more like a moment of awe. I've been thinking like this, but isn't existence like this? With all its complexities. I was thinking of Anapanasati, And now I'm talking about giver, receiver, and gift.

[07:48]

What brings about realization? What is it to realize what's going on in any moment? Is it a heart process or is it a head process? Or is it both? There's analogy. I think it started in early Buddhism. The analogy was the bird needs two wings to fly, wisdom and compassion. And then just before we eat oreoche, before we delve into our lives and the product of living them, and making them manageable, living them in a purposeful way, but a manageable way.

[09:15]

The term wields. There's a notion that I've heard Lucy has been talking about. Lucy's leading the practice, one of the practice leaders of the practice period. Turning, you know, like one turning of generosity is giving, one turning of generosity is receiving, one turning of generosity is the gift. The three wheels of this beautiful dynamic that we're all part of. You know, often we say in our official ceremonies, we say, and giving gratitude to our teachers, giving gratitude to our parents, giving gratitude to the person who served us coffee this morning, or whatever.

[10:43]

And some of that we know and we're thankful for, and some of that we don't know. We don't know that our very existence has depended upon and is now still dependent upon the kindness and generosity of others. especially when we're in a world as we seem to be in right now. There's all sorts of, well, we have a war over here, and we're deporting people over here, and we're locking people up, and separating five-year-old boys from their mother. Is it realistic to think that our lives are based on generosity?

[11:50]

I would suggest to you that we're all capable of generosity. We're all capable of the profundity of compassion. Now, how that mixes with the needs and drives of our so-called life, independent life, that's a mystery that we take on, on a constant basis. As many of you know, maybe all of you know, the Zendo at Tassajara burned down about a month ago.

[12:57]

But here we are doing a different kind of fundraiser. The simple truth is it's complicated. And we don't know all the complications that we face in rebuilding this endo. The notion, in my mind, is that given all the generosity and caring that we've received in the past. We're not so intimidated. We're not so frightened. We're not so unsettled. They give them this basis of generosity, of kindness, of giving and receiving.

[14:13]

As we engage in that way, there seems to be a reassurance that comes with it. Sometimes I think it's an act of faith to be generous. when you look around even our own city and think of the problems we're having being a city, you know, homelessness and drug-taking and many things. How shall we relate? What is it to say?

[15:18]

And realize the emptiness of the three wheels. Maybe what oils those wheels is our generosity and appreciation and gratitude. And so we decided to continue with our Zen-a-thon. And we are kicking it off, if that's a useful expression. As I said it, I thought, well, no, that's a silly expression. We're initiating it today. And what Miles came up with was this wonderful notion that each of us can make a web page and encourage our friends to donate.

[16:30]

In a way, it's me donating to us, and then us is the benefactor of we and me. Up in the northwest of the United States, there grew a tradition in the indigenous people to value and appreciate giving and receiving. And so some of the tribes, they actually made symbolic items, objects, you know.

[17:40]

And they weren't emphasizing the utility of the object, they were emphasizing giving and receiving. And then some other tribes, they added so much virtue to the notion of giving that people started giving everything they had, even their blankets, even their horses, and leaving themselves destitute. And then at a certain point, they started to realize this wasn't helpful. Some moderation was helpful. And then the people who had come from Europe and were exploring those areas, they were given gifts by the indigenous people.

[19:01]

And then the indigenous people said, well, now you give that very same gift to this other person. And the people who came from Europe were thinking, but it's mine now. You gave it to me. I'm keeping it. And this notion of Indian giver. You're giving something, but you're not really giving it. Can we oblige people and obligate them to be generous? I don't think so. I think it comes from our hearts. Maybe what's in our heads is, well, I need this much.

[20:14]

I need this to happen. and I need to have this on a permanent basis. Can we learn from our indigenous Indian brothers and sisters that supporting each other has a virtue. And who would we exclude from us? Would we exclude people we don't like, people we don't approve of, people that we think are behaving in a way

[21:16]

that's cruel? Or would we think of them as someone who hasn't yet realized the emptiness of the three wheels? So today, we will begin our Zen-a-thon. And you're all welcome to attend. And you're all welcome to think of yourself as in this virtuous circle of giver, receiver, and gift. Maybe having a deep gratitude is asking us to lead with our heart rather than our head, rather than the practicalities of life.

[22:43]

To think of how we be a sangha. How do we do that? I noticed in myself when I thought I was going to talk about Anapanasati that there's a flow to the logic of it. You saddle your mind like this, you observe this, and then you have the skillfulness of responding and relating to what you've realized. But it's never the whole story.

[23:54]

Even though we might think, well, you have to wait until the doshi bows before you push the platform. Maybe if you think, no, this is a precise detail that has to be observed. Someday the whole building might burn down. It has happened. And yet, within our gratitude, we can discover the virtue of giver, receiver, and gift.

[24:57]

Rather than thinking of ourselves as simply a private person who relates to a public we, a public us, that actually we're challenged to find the relationship, the appropriate way of engaging them both. When is it appropriate to lead with the mind? And when is it appropriate to lead with the heart? With our sense of gratitude, our sense of generosity, our sense of appreciation, of how the world comes together when we're trying to be virtuous rather than selfish.

[26:06]

And even within the world of Zen Center, we have a hierarchy. We have a central abbot. We have a president. We have a chair of the board. And actually, we have all sorts of defined roles. And then we have, right along with the hierarchy, We have inequality. Every one of us is Buddha, has that capacity to realize. And the interplay of those two is dynamic.

[27:21]

It's not like you reach the perfect way of relating, and then you just repeat. Our life in our world, in our sangha, is always in a state of flux. And then, with each of us, we're challenged. Now what's appropriate in your life? And that challenge can help us wake up, can help us be appropriate, can help us open our hearts. And yet, in a way, in another way, it's sort of like a mystery.

[28:36]

It's a mystery that has brought us here. It's a mystery that, as we examine it, It teaches us how to live, how to hear and witness in our world the diplomacy of war. I want it a certain way, and I will take it by force. In a way, what's happening in a global way is a teaching for us that we can apply to our own life. What is the balance between hierarchy and equality?

[30:02]

What is it on a global level? What is it on a national level? What is it on a personal level? What is it for a sangha? And I would say, in all of those realms, in all of those wheel turnings, awareness, communication, and coming from our heart. This is our challenge. This is our koan. And we welcome you in. It's lovely to see the Buddha Hall filled with people. Filled with good people.

[31:07]

Does good people imply bad people? This is our koan. Someone introduced me a while ago to a term, this term, ruinous compassion. I hadn't heard it before. that ruinous compassion. And I thought, hmm, maybe I'm more used to ruinous dispassion, where you start a war and think, yes, but the ends justify the means. So each of us to help us collectively discover appropriate response.

[32:23]

Each of us to contribute to this amazing event called a Zen Center. Sometimes it seems obvious what to do, and then sometimes it's just confining. So today we start the Zenathon. And I hope that you will feel invited, encouraged, to be part of the virtuous wheel of life.

[33:40]

And maybe you'll be foolish enough to take the next step into that virtue without knowing quite what it will create. I'm looking at this sutra cover. Someone found this batik in the good will. at Tassahara, and made it into a sutra cover. And I've used it for 30 odd years. Maybe it's time to give it away.

[34:48]

Maybe it's time to venerate it more. This is our life. Now what? Now what's appropriate? Individually, collectively, nationally, globally. This is... This is our challenge. What do we want to be when we grow up? Thank you. Thank you for listening to this podcast offered by the San Francisco Zen Center. Our Dharma Talks are offered free of charge, and this is made possible by the donations we receive.

[35:50]

Your financial support helps us to continue to offer the Dharma. For more information, please visit sfzc.org and click Giving. May we fully enjoy the Dharma.

[36:05]

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