and i certainly
so who says international raft all the time that we weren't always i'm hit him i can he wasn't don't make jokes it kind of her brother talk and at the most so either symbol aren't literally somebody but at the part of his top where he was talking about sam so complete tragedy in life
october
and so if any major kind of think about wearing it was coming from

but when you hurt somebody like that
you have to be careful because you weren't tearoom offer him your life you know why
offer eight him in life
so be careful
i am i have heard it said they didn't know if i'm going to be able to do this talk
come on
well maybe not
were men
a reddit stand that the most important matter is a matter of life and death
why do i always talk about these kinds of things
i used to think that that meant that there was a problem to be solved
well that's how it's kind of present and right the matter of life and death so i sort of thought like it was a problem like a mathematical problem and i was good at solving things so i was going to go right hand and solve it like
and what their sandwiches you know just if you get enlightened then you could for i mean when i first started i i started sitting in los angeles at the los angeles and center at the time they were doing as my azumi russia he was doing con cohen
right away
the fellow named though masato she came
and first during session he would come every year i think he came and hurghada russia when time came when you're sitting with them they gave you a coin to do like know so i thought that kind of the way they presented it like in the three pillars of sand their book
if you've got enlightened and as think it's kind of like i interviewed get enlightened near lot problem of life and death or kind of be solved is sort of little bit how it's present and anyway that's how it was presented then i think now it's different i think there's a kind of a softer nurse and kind of a modified
go on practice it isn't right
a little bit less
go out with
when i was there is really sent mails by really strict would stay up all night know when time i stayed up on yes like i was just rosie and i was really tired
and he was making a tremendous effort but they ever and i was making was grasping after i'm digressing somewhere i get back to my talker anyway
i thought life and death was something can be solved and i would just go ahead and solve it and thought were bread

but it turns out life is not like that
life is lana problem to be solved
when i think when you're young
there's lots still of possibilities
but when i get older uganda kind of a taste
that life is a little bit more
not serious but it's actually happening i think when you're young you kind of for like
via the of life is sort of happening but because it doesn't exactly have clearly have an end we don't quite get that it really is actually happening one out
does that make sense for people who are a little older
so my life is not a problem to be solved it's a mystery to be lived
we live at the moment by moment and it goes on until we're dying and then we live death moment by moment
perhaps for some people they have mentors
whoa help them along
or how they can watch who love life well like suzuki roshi you want it to live life like hit it

and for other people they don't feel like they had that kind of her guidance
i've come to believe that being able to live a life of integrity and maturity takes a lifetime of attention
courage
patient determination
and hopefully an abundant sense of humor
it's not easy to live well i think
it's really difficult
to stand up
in your own life as it has come to be
and to take responsibility for all of the things
that
all the quorum is an easy way of putting it all the things that came together
no and everything else
they created you us at this moment in time
i think the difference between a child and an adult no matter how old they are
is that a child still doesn't take responsibility for their life their feelings as their own they're still blaming they're still putting it out there pointing fault making excuses feeling self pity until it and so forth
indulging in various kinds of distractions and
i'm watching your faces and are you know that you know
an adult matter want the difficulty no matter how much the appropriate blame in a certain way
finally says it is my life
and i must stand up here
and i must love i must make of this life
an offering
a gift

with our all wounded hearts with something inside us that narrows in a physical way that we are truly and ultimately at home in the mystery
still we reduced the world may reduce this mystery to the word life to some idea some concept of me of other and whatever
but we must walk forward
into the fear young to the sense of separation
letting loose are hold on whatever it is
wha kang
best we can hop right
he the complete unknown
there are others who have done this in the past who can guide us
there are so who walk with us now offer a hand for stability and they can only do that we can only walk with each other in the suffering
or when people are actually engaged with the practice just encourage them in their joy and insights

and there are those of us here in this room
her royal do the work that must be done
to and little by little
the trail of karma the dualistic world
that causes such suffering
for us
and for others

as we do this work we get glimpses
bank glimpses sometimes small glimpses
we get insights
and then again were thrown back into our usual habitual stock places
eventually if you did this long enough what becomes real or less what becomes apparent his mantha the insights
as truth
can not the starkness is his trace
it's just swinging back and forth and back and forth and back and forth until finally we get let go of holding to some kind of inside as the truth
how i let go of our
sadness and
one tanks are mountainous one things
we even eventually let go of practice
and having gathered a certain man of strength we began to actually stand up has the person we have come to be

when this happens
the burden of the self is lifted
slightly more more so
my life presents itself in its pristine purity no matter what it is
whatever it is it sparkles with the vivid energy
the vastness
just the light of the sun
coming through the back of chris's air making it read remind you
then he has blood
coursing through his whole body
he's alive
his heart is beating
hey briggs
is that enough
at the sixth day of says shane that place in us that already knows the world of vastness can hear the dharma
can accept the dharma not what's the intellect but with somebody and we say something in us says yes yes
i know that to be true
so today i'd like to share with you some of my favorite words pointing to a place
that way already appreciate
in the deepest heart of our true selves
these are the words of dogan our ancestor
the word magician impossible to understand anyway
the profound healer
and soto zen master
this is so paragraph from one bright pearl or sometimes it's called the one bright jewel
boeing vast is the one bright show which is the whole world in the tim directions
this being so then though it seems to go changing faces trying or not turning
yeah it is a bright jaw
don't try to understand
just listen
it is precisely knowing that the show has all along been thus that is itself the bright shore
the bright girl has sound and form
in being are ready at vastness as far as worrying that oneself is not the bright jewel is concerned
one should not suspect that that is not the jaw
worrying and doubting grasping and rejection action and inaction are all but temporary views of small measure isn't it lovely
such leicester's and lights of the bright show are unlimited
each flickr
birch pain edge lost her age light is a quality of the whole world in all ten directions
since it is not action or thought caused by something existing which is not the bright shore the simple fact is that forward steps and backward steps in the ghost cave in the mountain of darkness
this are just one bright job
the leicester's and the lights i love how he says it's us in were a leicester
where a sparkling beam of life we are this one bright jewel
and general downtown's my chain is that practice and realization are not too different things
his teaching continually points to that truth
it's a teaching of total commitment to each activity
total commitment to sitting that's it
he just take your body down to the zendo and your plop it there and you sit and you're totally there i know what's going on in your mind or heart or body
you sit there letting the stuff of your life of life rule and it is
nonsense or not nonsense whatever it is complete commitment his blanche would say wholehearted practice
just sitting
nothing special
my first teaching when i was in l a was from
masami russia
i was i was it was during surgery i think what period during a session and i was of
i was on the stairs i think that with a vacuum and he came by and i asked him so
frustrating dharma question which i don't remember what it was
and i looked at me just like in one of these you know the club record stories or whatever i asked him this great question it looks at me and he says just vacuum
it was to settle for me
i will still into being enlightened
and i struggled for years and very stubborn person
whereas i struggled to get enlightenment
luckily it didn't happen because my burger problem
my burger problem was that i thought i was a failure
and so therefore i was able to a little pad for very long time

most suffering that we have is the motivation for practice so don't per poet it's very important to stay with a saffron
because it is the festival the rosen were suffering is because it's are small sets separate self that's the reason we're resentment
so we have to study that in the first place and many things happened when we said it besides eventually being liberated it also is the source of our compassion because when you can really accept your own suffering and nowhere comes from that it's dependently careers and and not your fault
then when you see other people suffering you really don't want them and you really wanna in a carry them gently or you know be extract if that's what seems to be appropriate
could you know how much it hurts
no
but the other thing is it really is our motivation because when you're finally tired when you've paid your dues and this takes a while
when you're finally tired of all the grasping
of all the wanting things to borrow different than they are of all the suffering from avoiding relationship when you're really tired of it that will motivate you to motivate his answer almost the only thing that motivates people unless you have a great enlightenment experience and then you're also motivated but people it's really tricky
because people get caught there because what they are motivated to do is go back to that old experience and that's exactly what doesn't work so in some way it's easier if you just don't have that experience and just in a slog through your suffering bit by bit
not maybe not as much fun but very effective
this is and do again
this is joe gans glimpse of emptiness you have to you have to stand in itself because you have to know that it's a delusion
well little study anything actually it doesn't really have to be the self but the self as they altered the bottom ignorance but but you have to pass through either a real a deep understanding of impermanence what you can do right now for the next two days cable looking at the stuff coming and going guy
or dependent colorizing everything is completely dependent on everything else there is no year there or emptiness or really all that is emptiness just different ways of finding it
so here's duggan's
peak small short so listen carefully i'm only gonna say at once
he might know this we were like a lot
you ready
no wind
no waves
an empty boat
flooded
with light

require
now

here's another one of my favorite things as from the game joe and you'll recognize it
a fish swims and the ocean and again don't even bother to understand it just listen to the in a refreshment of the dharma
a fish swims in the ocean and no matter how far it swims there is no end to the water a bird flies in the sky and no matter how far it flies there is no end to the air however the fish and bird have never left their elements when their activity is large their field as
large when they're need is small their field is small thus each of them totally covers it's full range
shivam totally experiences it's realm if the bird leaves the air it will die at once if the fish leaves the water it will die at once know that the water is life and air his life the bird his life and the fishes life life must pay the bird
and life must pay the fish it is possible to illustrate this with more analogies practice enlightenment and people are also like this

i think i want to read just one more

first i'll read it with a teeny bit of comment
and then i'll read it again without any
this same sound the acupuncture needle on thousand
the essential function of each single buddha
that's us
the function that's my com
the functional essence of each single buddha
manifests as long thinking k that's not thinking and not thinking it's long thinking it's letting thinking come and go
hey
complaints as long launching
waves study that in the sand guys he noted that about
manifestation as non thinking less manifestation is intimate in itself
as you do not thinking he life arises right in front of your face it's immediately in front of you all the time
completion as i'm merging this completion is verified of itself
completion is realization is intimacy
roast manifestation that is intimate and itself has never defiled
hey if you're just present now
there's not a duality
if reference to realistic and you're completely there it's not though
that's a little settlement
trickle
most completion that is verified of itself is never absolute or relative
when it's realized you don't stay in duality so when you have this sense of separation is simply don't hold to that sense he renounce barriers right you renounce the barrier between that you feel between yourself and whatever so the step in the thing that you're always when you recoil
in a relationship when you're always sort of turning away you fool that in the body is contraction contraction itself is pain it's painful to feel separate like as soon as you feel that contraction you just release it
we don't hold on to smallness you let down the barrier and if you let down the barrier the heart is already open you don't have to work at opening your hearts already open
intimacy that is never the filed or dualistic this intimacy is liberated without relying on anything
there isn't anything to rely on anyway
verification that is never absolute or relative not holistic those verification is genuinely actualized without any attempt without attempt as effort
but no desire
roger is clear to the bottom of fish swam like fish the sky is vast reaching into the heavens birds fly like birds so now i made it without my comment
the essential function of each single buddha the functional essence of each single buddha manifests as non thinking complaints as not emerging
manifestation as non thinking this manifestation is intimate in itself conclusion as nine merging this completion is verified of itself
this manifestation that is intimate and itself is never defiled
this completion that is verified of itself is never absolute or relative
and don't say that has never to filed less intimacy is liberated without relying on anything
verification that has never absolute or relative less verification is genuinely actualized without any attempt
water is clear to the bottom fish swim like fish
the sky is vast reaching into the heavens birds fly like birds
wherein the sixth day
my lives as they will be in a few days those thoughts
are not yet necessary to think about
keep the fruit of your effort going
don't tell the your mindfulness now
check with other people
i necessarily
don't waste the next two days in four-bed for this kind of concentration
you can still give up everything in a moment
you can surrender to the flow
simply watching the constantly changing patterns of a lotion thought
watching the sense of separation
be gentle and patient
for the next two days watched the self constantly being created
when you are including everything in your eyes in allowing yourself to flow with each new sensation thought or emotion you have perfect composure
no are the one bright jaw temporarily with the name peter
court janney
for erin
for susan
deirdre
poor chap watch him
it is not necessary to get rid of anything
just watch the difference between wanting
and how that fields and not wanting and how that feels
let us continue to make our best effort together
let us realize the one bright jewel at the center of each of us the journal that each of us his each one of us a facet
being thus is the one bright jewel which is the whole world
being so even though at times it seems to go changing faces joy or sadness
yet it is a bright show
it is precisely knowing
that the joe has all along been thus
that is itself the bride sure
in being already this
as far as worrying that oneself is not the bride joel is concerned
why should not suspect that that is not the jaw
isn't it lovely
such leicester's and lights of the bright show are unlimited
h flickr each being h lost her age light is a quality of the whole world in all ten directions
it is not the plants and trays of hair and there
it is not mountains and rivers of heaven and earth
it is far beyond such duality
it is just one bright sure
please
continue
and
together
practice diligently toward it