So I would like to welcome everyone here. Thank you for coming in this surprising A little rainstorm? Maybe not, but anyhow, this unexpected rain. Many of you have heard me talk before, and so you've probably heard... Well, maybe you can hear better once she gets in the right place.

[01:00]

So you've probably heard me say more than once if you've been here often that I came to practice through discovering at age 43 that I personally was going to die. It had never sort of occurred to me before. But my best friend and contemporary had a very bad headache one night, was diagnosed with an inoperable brain tumor the next morning, went into a coma and died in the course of a few weeks. And it was shocking. It was not sort of, well, yeah, everybody dies later when you get old, you know, I don't have to think about that now. But what was particularly helpful to me was along with that realization, and I was terrified by it, because I just really had never given any thought to my own death.

[02:23]

Along with it came this question, How do you live if you know you're going to die? Who knows that? And so it started me looking for something that I had not known I needed. And in the course of it, someone told me about the Zendo in Berkeley and I could get Zazen instruction there. So I did. And I started sitting Zazen every day. And Suzuki Roshi came on Mondays and gave a Dharma talk, and we came over to Sokoji Temple. I mean, several carloads of us from Berkeley came over to Sokoji Temple here in Japantown, where Suzuki Roshi was then living and teaching, on Wednesday nights and Saturday mornings. As I prepare for a talk, I'm always acutely aware that But Suzuki Roshi gave five Dharma talks a week. He gave a Dharma talk on Wednesday night and Saturday morning at Sokoji.

[03:33]

He gave one on Monday at Berkeley. He gave one on Tuesday at Mill Valley. He gave one on Thursday at Los Altos. And another one on Saturday at Sokoji. The ones at Los Altos were taped. and transcribed by Marian Weisberg, who died this year. And they became Zen Mind Beginner's Mind, which is now still 40 years, more than 40 years, in print in, I forget, 14 languages or something like that. a book which has been extremely helpful to many people all around the world. Somehow, Suki Roshi had a knack for speaking of the Dharma in a way that we could understand.

[04:41]

He was always very happy when he found another colloquial expression he could use in other slang words so that he felt more connected with us. It was quite fun to watch. Like the verse on the Han says, birth and death is the great matter. All is impermanent, quickly passing. Wake up, wake up. Don't waste this life. Well, he liked to say, don't goof off. But this question of how do you live if you know you're going to die became very, very important to me. One of the things that I have discovered is

[05:46]

It took me a long time to really get it. I think it's only recently that I've sort of fallen in love with the sutra on loving kindness, with the Buddhist discourse on loving kindness, the metta-sutta, which is why I asked someone to make it available to everyone who doesn't know it so that we can chant it together. Because they're very... I really learned a lot of things that I think help me understand how to live. If you know you're going to die, the first being, of course, the precepts. But I think in the Mata Sutta, the Buddha says very clearly how we live. And so I want us to chant it together so that I can talk about it.

[06:48]

I think, can you all hear me? Okay. So, this is what should be accomplished by the one who is wise, who seeks the good and hasn't paid peace. Let one be strenuous, upright, and sincere without pride, easily contented and joyous. Let one not be submerged by the things of the world. Let one not take upon oneself the burden of riches. Let one's senses be controlled. Let one be wise but not puffed up. Let one not Let one do nothing that is mean or that the wise is reproof. May all beings be happy.

[07:51]

May they be joyous and live in safety. All living beings, whether weak or strong, in high or middle or low realms of existence, small or great, visible or invisible, near or far, born or to be born, may all beings be happy. Let no one deceive another nor despise any being in any state. Let none by anger or hatred wish harm to another. Even as a mother at the risk of her life watches over and protects her only child, so with a boundless mind should one cherish all living things suffusing love over the entire world, above, below, and all around without limit. So let one cultivate an infinite goodwill toward the whole world. Standing or walking, sitting or lying down, during all one's waking hours, let one practice the way with gratitude.

[09:01]

Not holding to fixed views, endowed with insight, freed from sense appetites one who achieves the way will be freed from the duality of birth and death this aspiration that one cherish all living things suffusing love over the entire world above, below and all around without limit So let one cultivate an infinite goodwill toward the whole world. This aspiration has really... It just wakes something up in me. It's such an inspiring aspiration. And it's so hard for us. So I think that this is...

[10:03]

For me, the best response to my question of how do you live if you know you're going to die, I think I've kind of fallen in love with love here. We can often do that, but this kind of love, this kind of unrestricted, universal, all beings without exception, we may have to practice long and hard to cultivate compassion for people whose actions are not loving kindness. For people who are suffering in such a way that they don't understand how to love. That they've never experienced love and all of all they have experienced is the greed, hate, and delusion which creates so much suffering in our lives.

[11:10]

They don't recognize the oneness of all being. I noticed in a recent book that came out on The Essential Dogen that There is a place where Dogenzenji has equated delusion and not realizing oneness. The essential delusion is not realizing the oneness of all being. The fact that we are all totally connected. And when you don't realize that, then you can get taken in by self-serving, apparently self-serving notions of being a separate self, for one thing, of not being one with all being.

[12:26]

But that experience is very difficult. when you realize that you're truly connected with all being, then there is such a vastness to your own life and the life of all around you that the kinds of ways in which greed and hatred express themselves just don't appeal to you. because you know you're connected to all being. But if you don't know you're connected to all being, if you haven't had that experience, you don't, it's, it takes a little more effort to realize how important it is to act with loving kindness in all situations, in all circumstances, to cultivate compassion

[13:33]

to cultivate all of the four heavenly abodes of love and kindness, compassion, empathetic joy, and... Oh, isn't it lovely? Equanimity. Equanimity. You'll see. You'll all get a chance to find out about memory at some point. So, right here, this is what should be accomplished by the one who is wise, who seeks the good, and has obtained peace. Well, that's a big order. Someone who's obtained peace is rather far advanced in their practice. But in any event, he said, let one be strenuous, upright, and sincere. Okay, that's how to live, isn't it?

[14:35]

Now, this being strenuous reminds me of when I first heard Suzuki Roshi say, Zen is making your best effort on each moment forever. And I think it's the first time anybody had said in my hearing, Zen is, and then fill in the blank. So I grabbed onto that effort. Some 30 years later, 40 years later, a poet who was in residence here at the time did a project in which she borrowed everybody's Zen mind, beginner's mind, and noticed where they had underlined or highlighted And in my copy, what she found was that the word effort was highlighted every time it appeared in Zen Mind and Beginner's Mind.

[15:41]

I was trying to study, well, what is this effort that he's talking about? This is how I'm supposed to live. And it's right here in strenuous. This is one aspect of what he says is, let one be strenuous, upright, and sincere, without pride, easily contented and joyous. That's a nice thing to start working on, isn't it? Strenuous, upright, and sincere, without pride, easily contented and joyous. Let one not be submerged by the things of the world. Oh boy. You know, when you get to my age, the house is full of things. Some are nice things.

[16:41]

I mean, I have pictures of all my family there and stuff, but mostly it's just things. Too much of them. Let one not take upon oneself the burden of riches. Let one's senses be controlled and let one be wise but not puffed up. And let one not desire great possessions even for one's family. There's a lot in there about not being too acquisitive. This, I think, helps to lighten the effect of greed. So then, may all beings be happy. May they be joyous and live in safety.

[17:42]

That's the essence of this teaching. How do we cultivate happiness? Well, for me, I'm discovering that it has everything to do with loving everybody. I think this loving everyone without exception, whether weak or strong and high or middle or low realms of existence, dear or far, born or to be born, can we find a way to open our heart to everyone without exception. Can we find the joy in giving, giving something to someone, something that they want? Maybe it's just a smile, but maybe it's a real connection.

[18:53]

how do we cultivate this love that includes everyone? I think we have to see ourselves in everyone in order to be able to do that. You know, when I first started to practice, I heard myself say, I'm fighting for peace. Isn't that an oxymoron? Isn't there a peaceful way to work for peace? I don't know. Has that kind of thought ever occurred to you? I'm fighting for what's good. I'm right because I'm fighting for what's good for everybody. But isn't there a way to work for it in a peaceful way, in a way that emphasizes our connection rather than our separation?

[20:00]

Even if you strongly disagree with someone, how will you find your connection rather than your separation? And I find that this emphasis on love is not... is not limited to the Buddha's teaching. Paramahansa Yogananda said, extend the boundaries of the glowing kingdom of your love, extend the boundaries of the glowing kingdom of your love, gradually including your family, your neighbors, your community, your country, all countries. all living sentient creatures.

[21:02]

And of course, you know, this emphasis on love is not limited to Eastern religions, although it's very, very prominent in the Sufi tradition. I could have, but I was kind of challenged about... how many quotations I bring in here. So I was gonna try to limit that a little bit today. But I tell you, this website of Brother David Steindlress, the website, gratefulness, or gratefulness, as he says, gratefulness.org, they send some wonderfully supportive quotations. Every day they appear on my email at the top of the list because somebody must do this in the middle of the night, I don't know. Like 1201, there it is. But some wonderful quotations emphasizing the importance of love and the importance of gratefulness, of course.

[22:18]

I really had a taste of gratefulness. The day I left the hospital after having had a heart attack about, let's see, 1989, whatever that is, some years ago, I walked out of the hospital and I thought, wow, I'm alive. I could be dead. Oh, wow, the rest of my life is just a gift. Oh, it always has been. I didn't notice it till now. But, you know, when you realize that life is just a gift, that's a great source of happiness and a great teaching of gratitude or gratefulness. As I say, Brother David likes to call it gratefulness. Generally, I...

[23:26]

I speak of it as gratitude, but I like the great fullness. So this has, this metta sutta, I recommend that you take it to heart and learn it by heart so that you can just remind yourself of it any old time. This is what... This is what should be accomplished by the one who is wise, who seeks the good and has obtained peace. Let one be strenuous. Just let it flow through your mind like a little sort of trickling stream, always keeping this little flow of gratitude for our connection with all beings everywhere. with our gratitude for life itself. You know, Suzuki Roshi turned to Mel one day and said, you know, Mel, just to be alive is enough.

[24:29]

And then proceeded on down the hall, that's all he said. Sometimes we don't realize that. And I am gonna use a couple more quotes here. Because Thich Nhat Hanh, who's a wonderful teacher, really emphasizes smiling. And one time he said to someone, if I come in the kitchen and ask you what you're doing, I'd rather have you say breathing and smiling, Tai, than chopping carrots. He wanted you to be aware of what you're doing every moment, but breathing and smiling, he wanted you to be aware of that all the time.

[25:34]

Breathing and smiling, for him, go together. If you're alive, you should be smiling, I think. He said that the source of a true smile is an awakened mind. Smiling helps you approach the day with gentleness and understanding. So, that's it. I don't have any more quotations. So, what I want to really... emphasize is the importance of loving yourself to begin with. Here you have been given this precious life. How will you live it? How will you share it with others?

[26:35]

How will you find love that connects all of us? the love that is fundamental to how we are in the world. You start by giving it. You start by finding out how to love the people all around you. What do they need? What do they want? How can you make their life richer? In the process, of course, your life becomes richer. But our effort is to turn our attention to how we can really love each person we meet, which is, of course, helped by the fact that we may realize at some time that we are vitally and intimately connected with all beings.

[27:46]

It's painful to see someone who is not aware of that connection, who, you know, as the Buddha says in the Madhusutta, to not despise any being in any state. to cultivate an infinite goodwill toward the whole world. So with a boundless mind should one cherish all living things, suffusing love over the entire world, above, below, and all around without limit. So let one cultivate an infinite goodwill toward the whole world. Can you make space in your heart for the whole world?

[28:58]

How can we do that? One breath at a time. One smile at a time. One bow at a time. For me, I'm at an age where I can get by with hugging people without anybody getting confused by it. And so it's my practice nowadays. And many people seem to be willing to cooperate with me in this matter. Although I had one person who's a really great hugger, She was a resident here and we had a contract that we were going to hug first and we saw each other every morning. She's not here now and I miss her.

[30:03]

But it's not, you know, the Buddha did not discover love. Love is the essence of every religion that I know. you know I was pleased to see that that is the emphasis of Pope Francis. It's that love and taking care of people is more important than dogma. I think that's a wonderful teaching and I'm so happy that the Catholic Church has such a pope at this time. And can we find it in ourselves to realize that love and taking care of people is more important than dogma.

[31:19]

I can get very dogmatic about peace and justice, you know. I have to be careful about that. I want to work for peace and justice, but I want to do it in a loving way. I think that's really all I have to say. It's all about love. It may sound corny. I'm sorry. But find out where in your heart is an opening that you can make a wider opening and just let it keep getting more and more and more open until there's room for everybody in your heart. Thank you for listening to this podcast offered by the San Francisco Zen Center.

[32:25]

Our programs are made possible by the donations we receive. Please help us to continue to realize and actualize the practice of giving by offering your financial support. For more information, visit sfcc.org and click Giving. May we fully enjoy the Dharma.

[32:46]

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