This podcast is offered by the San Francisco Zen Center on the web at sfcc.org. Our public programs are made possible by donations from people like you. Welcome. I saw a face over here. And I thought, oh, that reminds me of someone that I haven't seen at Gringotts for quite a while. And then I looked over, and there she was. There's a wide variety of people in this room. Some people have been coming here for decades. Now their grandchildren are coming.

[01:05]

And some people are maybe new. How many people here are here for the first time? Quite a few. Welcome. And at the beginning of this assembly, we just did a chant. Did you hear it? it goes something like this an unsurpassed penetrating and perfect Dharma how many are from unfamiliar with the word Dharma not okay Dharma one person's unfamiliar Dharma has many meanings one meaning a Dharma is the teaching of reality Another meaning is reality itself. Another meaning is the phenomena of our life, the things we're aware of.

[02:13]

So it has all those meanings. In the case of an unsurpassed penetrating and perfect dharma, it probably means the case of an unsurpassed teaching or an unsurpassed reality. So in the tradition of the Buddha Dharma, the Buddha's teaching, or the Buddha's truth, it's the truth which Buddhas realize and transmit. And this truth is what Buddhas realize and give to people in order so that they can be Buddhas, so that they can be at peace in this life and free and also able to transmit the truth which brings peace and freedom. That's the Dharma of the Buddhas, the Buddha Dharma.

[03:20]

Our central truth, which is our central teaching, which is our central truth. And then it says, It's such a truth, such a teaching is rarely met with, even in a hundred thousand million eons. Having it to see and listen to, to remember, to remember and accept. Then the last line is a vow. And again, people who just arrived, You may be surprised to hear us making a vow right at the beginning, but that's what we did. We start with making a vow, with making a wish. I vow to taste the truth of the Tathagata's words.

[04:24]

This person vows to taste the truth. of the Tathagata's words, the Tathagata's dharma. I vow to taste the truth of the Tathagata's dharma. I want to, I wish to, I commit to tasting the truth of the Tathagata's words. And Tathagata is a Sanskrit word which is one of the epithets of Buddha. So Buddha has Epithets are kind of like nicknames or formal appellations. One of the epithets of a Buddha is Samyaksam Buddha, a completely enlightened Buddha. Another epithet is Tathagata, which means both one who has gone...

[05:31]

suchness. Ta-ta-ta is Sanskrit for suchness or thusness, the way things are, the way our life really is. One of the names from Buddha is somebody who has gone from the world of the way things are somewhat deceptive to the world of of the way things really are. And then Tathagata also means come back. Going to suchness and coming back from suchness. So the Buddha, the Buddhas go to the Dharma and then they come from the Dharma. They hear the Dharma and go to the Dharma and then they realize the Dharma and come bringing the Dharma to all living beings.

[06:35]

Ta-ta-ta. Suchness. Kind of an abstract sounding word. The way things are. The way our life really is. Buddhas come from there to teach the way things are, because when we understand the way things are, we become free of fear and all hindrance to being free. And we are at peace. So at the beginning, we said that, and some of us are ready to say, yes, I meant that. I said I vow to taste the truth of the Tathagata's words and I really do vow to taste the Tathagata's words. This morning I'd like to talk with you about how to taste the truth of the Tathagata's words and also

[07:56]

how to take care of the vow to do so, and also, if possible, to also talk about what to do when we don't do that, when we don't follow the vow after we make it. Here's another vow which I personally, I have quite a few vows. Maybe you do too. Another vow which I commit to is I wish that all living beings and me will remember

[09:01]

That's a vow that I am committed to. I'm wishing that all of us, that I, together with all beings, will remember suchness. In other words, remember where the Buddhas go to and where they come from. Another way I say this is I wish, I vow, that I, together with all beings, I vow that I, together with all beings, will remember stillness, which includes silence. imperturbable tranquility.

[10:13]

I vow that I, together with all of you and all living beings, will remember stillness. The stillness in which Buddhas live and the stillness from which Buddhas come to meet us. I vow with all living beings, I vow together with all living beings to remember stillness. This stillness is a precept of the Buddhas. It's the precept, a precept which those who have gone to reality and come from reality have transmitted

[11:25]

us. They've transmitted the precept of stillness. They transmit stillness. They remember it. And so I vow to remember what the Buddhas remember. I vow together with all living beings to remember precept of stillness of the Buddhas. And I further vow with all sentient beings to receive the precept of stillness. It is given to me. It is given to me. It is given to me and it is given to me every moment.

[12:31]

The precept of stillness is given to me. And I vow to receive it every moment. With everybody. And after remembering it and receiving it, I vow to practice it. practice the Buddha's precept of stillness. And I vow together with all beings to transmit it. To transmit it by remembering it, being mindful of it, receiving it, and practicing it. That's how I vow to transmit it. I've been making this vow for a while.

[13:35]

More than a few times, I have made that vow with part of my body or all of my body. And part of my mind or all of my mind. But when I feel like I'm making that vow with my whole body and mind so far, I've always been very happy to do so and never regretted it. So I'm intending to continue to make this vow and wish that everybody will make this vow. That everybody will remember and receive and practice and transmit the stillness of the Buddhas. in order to liberate all beings, like Buddhists do. This morning, a four-year-old girl came to visit Green Gulch with her mother.

[14:50]

And then her mother went off, left the valley, and left the little girl with me and my spouse. The little girl calls me granddaddy. And she calls my spouse Abu, which is Mandarin Chinese for grandma. So then the little girl and Abu were going to go to the beach. And the little girl says to me, as she's getting ready, she says, granddaddy. are you coming to the beach? And I said, no, I'm going to the Zendo. And she said, the Zendo is the worst place at Green Gulch. Before that, we were doing various artistic endeavors.

[16:11]

We were drawing with pencils and crayons, and then we started to paint with watercolors. She invites me to join her art projects. Orders me to join her art projects. And I'm happy to do so. that goes right along with my vow to remember stillness and receive stillness. So when her granddaddy is helping her and joining her with her art projects and all other wholesome projects which she invites or commands him to do, his vow is to remember stillness while he's talking and sitting and painting with her.

[17:13]

When I first started to draw with her, she said, sit down when you draw. And I said, okay, and I sat down. And I was remembering stillness, and I was happy to remember stillness. Stillness removes... Remembering stillness and receiving stillness and practicing stillness and transmitting stillness in whatever I'm doing melts away any resistance to following the orders of your leader. Your four-year-old leader or... You're a million-year-old leader. Because when you practice stillness, when you practice Buddhist stillness, this is for the sake of serving all beings.

[18:20]

Serving all beings. Being of service from and in stillness. But If I forget stillness and I move, then I fall into a pit. Then I'm trapped. I'm not free. And so when I receive my orders, I may hesitate or feel some sticking and be unable to serve because I moved, I forgot, Stillness. I forgot to remember being still with all beings and all Buddhas.

[19:21]

There's an expression which we recite often, which is, if you want to practice suchness, practice suchness without delay. Now, one might think, if you want to practice leaving Green Gulch later today, then I might not say, well, practice that without delay. Because maybe you have to wait till later, you might think, in order to leave. But when it comes to practicing suchness, the instruction is, don't wait till later to do it. Later is not the time to practice suchness. Now is the time to practice it. What you do without delay is suchness.

[20:35]

The way you are is not delayed. But if you move, funny thing is, you get trapped in where you are. Where you are is where you are. But if you move, you become trapped. But if you're still with where you are, you're not trapped. And you're free to live the next moment. So I enjoyed remembering and receiving and practicing suchness with the four-year-old leader until she went to the beach. Hopefully she'll be returning and I'll see her later.

[21:39]

So someone says to me, If you want to practice suchness, practice suchness without delay. And then the person tells me, but my life is sometimes overwhelming. So I can't remember to practice stillness when it's overwhelming. I can't remember stillness when I feel overwhelmed, when I feel terrorized, when I feel oppressed, when I'm frightened, when I feel insulted, when people say to me, Granddaddy, don't practice stillness.

[22:47]

Come with me to the beach. Part of remembering to practice stillness and receiving stillness is to give up practicing stillness. Part of remembering and receiving stillness is to not hold on to stillness. Because it's given to you. You do not have to hold on to it. So... If a little girl tells you, don't attach to stillness, you can easily say, thank you for reminding me not to attach to stillness. I wouldn't want to do that, would I? No, granddaddy, you wouldn't want to attach to stillness.

[23:50]

You want to receive it and give it away. Yes. It's given to me. It's given to you. I vow to receive it. And practice it means I vow to give it away, which means transmit it. To show the little girls that I'm not attached to my practice and to show myself. But sometimes I can't even remember. Not to mention I can't remember to receive. I don't think I have it. And then I might try to get it. But it's not something to get. It's something to receive. You don't get it. It's given. And sometimes things happen and you think, I gotta get this suchness. I gotta get what the Tathagatas have.

[24:52]

I gotta get stillness. Okay. That's what you're up to. That's the color paint you're using. That's the crayon you have. And you're saying, when I've got this crayon, I cannot remember stillness. OK. And trying to get stillness makes it harder to remember stillness, but not impossible. But anyway, I did forget it. And I did try to get it. I tried to get it even though I've heard and said, I cannot get it. I cannot give what the Buddha's, what the enlightened nature of our life gives to me every moment. I cannot get it. It is given to me. I can receive it because I do receive it. But if I forget that I receive it, then I feel...

[25:58]

terrible, plus I might also feel like in this feeling terrible, I cannot remember. But now I notice that I'm not remembering. So now I move to the part of the talk which is to mention what to do when you forget to receive stillness. What to do when you say, this is too hard to receive stillness, and I believe it, and I notice that I believe it, and I'm... Yeah, I'm really confused. So being confused is not really the problem. The problem is I forget the precept which has been given to me when I'm confused. Confusion arose... I got multiple conflicting orders from my leader and confusion arose about what I should do with these rapidly changing instructions.

[27:13]

In that confusion, I forgot the practice of stillness. And I I confess it. I confess. I forgot the practice. I didn't remember it. And because I didn't remember it, I didn't receive it. And I'm sorry. Sorry for what? Sorry for remembering stillness and receiving stillness and practicing stillness. and transmitting stillness. I got distracted in the confusion. But I vow to learn to not get distracted when I'm confused or when there is confusion. Buddhas are living in an inexhaustible ocean of confusion with all of us.

[28:28]

And Buddha is not forgetting stillness in the midst of all different varieties of confusion. It's not to turn all the confusion off. It's to practice compassion towards all forms of confusion. To practice stillness with all forms of confusion, with all confused beings. But when confusion arises in a particular being like me, it's possible that I forget the stillness. So then I can notice I kind of forgot the stillness. He was pressing down with the paintbrush really hard on the watercolors, gouging out the colors.

[29:41]

It was a very dramatic expression of energy of the brush and the water and then pushing the brush into the color, threatening the destruction of the color. It's possible to remember stillness at such moments of the precipice of destruction. I wish and I vow when on the precipice of destruction with all sentient beings to remember stillness. This is what I want, and I want everybody to remember it in all the different varieties of possible destruction.

[31:05]

I'm proposing that when the specter of destruction arises, If I forget the stillness, I become trapped in the specter. If I practice compassion with the specter of destruction, if I remember to practice Buddha's compassion to receive Buddha's compassion, to practice Buddha's compassion and transmit Buddha's compassion with the specter of destruction, or even the appearance of destruction and more destruction. If I remember these precepts and receive them and practice them and transmit them, they will be moving freely and beyond the destruction. This is a faith that has come to me, that has been given to me, which leads me to vow to practice stillness in the midst of possible and apparently manifested destruction.

[32:32]

Not to stop the destruction, not to eliminate the destruction, not to fix the destruction, but... in all those cases, to be still with the destruction and to realize freedom from destruction in whatever phase the process is manifesting. And if I do forget if destruction seems to be coming or seems to be here and I forget, what? Forget to remember stillness and forget to receive it, then I have another practice, which is another practice of compassion, which is to confess, I forgot, I didn't receive, and I didn't practice, and it's not what I want to do.

[33:36]

I don't want to forget, but I did, and I'm sorry. Now, one more step. I'm just going to tell you the whole story now. One more step is that the practice is to invoke the presence and compassion of those who come from suchness, the Buddhas, the great beings who have gone to and returned from the stillness of Buddha to invoke them and ask them to witness. So I can start with the simple practice of I confess I forgot stillness a few minutes ago when I was yelling at you or you were yelling at me.

[34:43]

When we were quiet together, I was remembering stillness And I was at peace with you. But then when I started yelling at you, I got distracted from the stillness. Or even when I was just talking to you like at a talk on Sunday morning in the worst place at Green Gulch. While I was talking, I got distracted from stillness. Now I invoke, I invite all the Buddhas to come and witness me. as I say, I got distracted from stillness and I'm sorry. This is a practice of compassion towards myself for my forgetfulness and it is a practice of compassion towards all beings who forget and it's a practice of compassion for all beings because this practice of confession and saying I'm sorry, I forgot will melt away the root

[35:49]

of being distracted from the practice of all Buddhas. The practice of all Buddhas is to remember stillness, receive it, practice it, and transmit it. I wish to do that practice. I wish to practice the precepts of the Buddhas. When I forget, then I do another practice of the another precept of the Buddhas, which is to invite the Buddhas to come and witness that I got distracted from the precepts which they have given to me. And this practice, all Buddhas have done this practice until they never forgot anymore. It is possible someday not to forget, but that will follow quite a few times of forgetting. And each moment is an opportunity to remember.

[37:01]

And then if we're successful and we remember and we receive stillness and practice it and transmit it, then that's the Buddhist practice. That's what Buddhas are doing. We're joining the practice. Then everything changes and it's time to do it again. And then everything changes and it's time to do it again. And everybody's coming to us and offering us change to give us another opportunity, or you could say another challenge, to remember. Come and paint with me. Okay. Sit down when you paint. Okay. Stand up now. Wrap that towel around me. Tie it in a knot. Untie it. Come over here. Each situation is changing rapidly. Is it possible to remember?

[38:04]

I say yes. Is it possible to forget? I say yes. I think you all know it's possible to forget. I'm suggesting it's possible to remember. Once in a while. And... with the practice of confessing forgetfulness and distraction and feeling sorry about it and revealing this and disclosing this in the presence of all Buddhas and ancestors, we will become successful and continuous in the practice someday. And part of being still is also not to be in a hurry not to rush ahead to the time when we're completely successful. To be patient with our current level of skill, our current level of consistency.

[39:10]

That's part of stillness, is to be still with how skillful we are with stillness. And then, of course, part of forgetting stillness is to be caught by being more still, by being caught, by being more still than we are. And to think about going to the place of more stillness than this. Someone may say to me, you have kind of a low quality stillness. Your stillness is really not very still. I might even think that about myself. This is an opportunity to be still with that. Or to be tricked. Suchness, the word suchness and stillness are words that I understand include all the Buddhist precepts.

[40:53]

Stillness includes generosity, ethical discipline, patience, diligence, tranquility, and wisdom. Those are all expressions of stillness. Those practices are all expressions of suchness. They are all expressions of the way our life really is. Buddha's life is really generosity, ethical behavior, patience, diligence, concentration, and wisdom. That's Buddha's life. That's the way the Buddha's life is. And the way Buddha's life is, is the way our life really is.

[42:09]

We really are generous, ethical, and so on. In this school, Buddha's precepts are precepts about the way we actually are. We actually are generous. The precept of generosity is not to stop stinginess and make generosity. It's the precept about the way we really are. But then again, we have a practice called remembering generosity, receiving generosity, practicing generosity, and transmitting it. not stopping ourselves from being the way we aren't and being the way we should be, but remembering the way we really are.

[43:19]

Stillness is not killing, not stealing, not lying. That's stillness. Stillness is not stealing, not lying, not killing. That's the way we really are. Now, if I say that's the way Buddhas are, you might say, yeah, that makes sense. But Buddhas are the way we really are. And they give us the precept of not killing. For us to remember... and receive and practice and transmit. The way we really are is not lying.

[44:33]

That precept as Buddha's precept, is not to stop lying and tell the truth. It is to be still and practice not lying. Because this is what's given to us. Not lying is given to us. But if we don't remember it and receive it, then it's like we forget it. And when we forget it, then we can think we're lying. Or we can think other people are lying. And then we can feel overwhelmed by the thought, she's lying to me. And overwhelmed means I can't remember to receive stillness when she talks like that. But I admit that and I'm sorry.

[45:44]

And now I want to learn to remember that... I want to remember stillness when she seems to be lying to me. And when she seems to be lying to me and I remember stillness, then I remember she's not lying to me. I remember not lying. in stillness. But my mind can be involved with she is lying to me or I am lying to her. Such thoughts can arise. And then when those thoughts arise, I vow to remember stillness. And remembering stillness and receiving stillness when one or more people seem to be lying to me, or I seem to be lying to them, remembering stillness is remembering stillness.

[46:53]

It's remembering Buddha's precepts. It's remembering Buddha's precepts. Not lying, not stealing, not killing, not misusing sexuality, not intoxicating, and so on. It's remembering them. And then it's practicing them. Excuse me. And then it's receiving them. The Buddhas are constantly giving us these precepts. And then it's receiving them. And you can even add in a little thank you very much when you receive these precepts. Thank you for the precept of not killing. Thank you for the precept of not lying. And then you practice them. Practice not lying by practicing stillness. Practicing stillness, which includes not lying and not killing and not stealing.

[48:00]

Practice what you have been given and then transmit it. And number one is remember. And the Buddhas, with all the Buddhas' great realizations, Buddhas cannot make us remember every moment. So they transmit the precept of confession for us when we forget what they've transmitted to us. And even when we forget what we want to remember and what we want to receive, they've also transmitted the precept of confessing and repenting when we forget. And they said that they confessed and repented, too, in their evolution. So it isn't just that Buddhas have received the precepts of stillness, which includes all the other precepts, and that they have practiced them.

[49:16]

It isn't just that the Buddhas have remembered and received and practiced. They have also forgotten and not practiced. But then they confessed and repented. So if I wish, as I do, that I, together with all beings, will remember, receive, practice, and transmit all these Buddha precepts, I also receive the Buddha precept of if I should happen to forget and not receive and not practice, then I practice confessing that I forgot And I express my sorrow that I forgot. And then I start over remembering, receiving, and so on. And I understand that the Buddhas did the same thing.

[50:20]

And when we have a formal ceremony here where people formally have a commitment to practice Buddha's precepts, we say it Towards the beginning of the ceremony, we start the process of Buddha's precepts. We start with confession and repentance. And then we receive them. So in that ceremony, we start by saying, all my ancient twisted action, I confess and repent. And then we say, after we do that, the preceptor who's given the precepts says, from now on, and even after realizing Buddhahood, will you continue this practice of confession and repentance? And the people usually say, yes, I will. And we do that three times.

[51:26]

But even though we do that three times, then later, the people in the ceremony forget that they said they would do that practice. But then they confess that they forgot to do the practice, and then they remember. And then they continue to do the practice of saying, I forgot the practice. When I got slapped on the right and slapped on the left, when I got given contradictory instructions by a high-intensity voice, I forgot. I forgot my job. And I'm sorry. And now I want to remember my job again. And now I remember my job. OK, great. Now I receive my job. Now I'm practicing my job and thus transmitting my job.

[52:29]

One more time, the teaching of suchness, the teaching of stillness of the Buddhas, again, is teaching the way things really are. We really are the way we are. We really are still and unmoving. And within that stillness and within the reality of where we are, all of our magnificent activity is going on. We are our whole life, and our whole life includes all of our activities. So, in the midst of all those activities, remember your whole life. Your whole life, which is the stillness of the Buddhas. Please, remember.

[54:05]

Do me a favor. Thank you for listening to this podcast offered by the San Francisco Zen Center. Our programs are made possible by the donations we receive. Please help us to continue to realize and actualize the practice of giving For more information, visit sfzc.org and click Giving. May we fully enjoy the Dharma.

[54:40]

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