January 30th, 2002, Serial No. 03945

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good evening
and good night
and i've actually thought quite a that is talk not so much because what it is that i want to say which is something yeah you've heard innumerable times before
that because it's the first time to and together with here for a bad it's wednesday night and it's i it's ask you know
and and i can't and i like seeing in seeing your asus and really only one it is just cheer us on keep guy cliff
and i had that thought because and this is the last wednesday night talk before the next to and china like she's kind of be the orientation to the and practice perry the next practice parish
and that's a time and refocusing and a clarifying and re dedicating ourselves to
waking up
two living from a place of the heart as much as i can
i'm falling down and getting up over and over and over again of making in newham own mistakes sharing them
embarrassingly everybody else and
picking ourselves up and tagging ourselves and i am
hank i fired
keeping guy suzuki roshi said the hardest thing in this practice was to keep going just keep guy just keep walking through the mist
until we i tripping and soaking wet through and ten
so am
last saturday morning we had the four months family has that it is really appropriate or months and am i right before when we're going to start the next practice period because it's during the farmland ceremony that we make this way commitment the first thing we do is way confess way repair
we admit our ancient twisted karma
can you may have traveled it them now
and then way
also give homage we declare our gratitude we appreciate we make known our appreciation to the lineage to the people who have simply pick themselves up over and over again and kept going and overlapped enough so that we have this pie
precious heritage
and then we went for refuge then for refuge in and buddha the awakened person you know i notice yes the other day on saturday as my fact when i was doing them right in the middle of and semi for the first time i think i i black this out
sit as you know with are some tips touching right and my my
grab you know he is something from that catching
his gorgeous the the fever and like lewis said there that feeling he has a wonderful feelings they are south
did i lose my check of site
tomlin oh so we went to a refuge for the buddha progress huge in our own awakened mind we took refuge to the dharma that teaching we took refuge again and the sanga us to people with home we're going to be making all these mistakes

and we said these four valve
we said beings are numberless i vow to save them
delusions are inexhaustible i vow to put an end to them dharma gates are boundless i vow to enter them
enter them but his ways unsurpassable i vow to become it
these are the
inexplicable are the
ah wordless words of a bodhisattva we are buddies office we are people who are wanting we are awakening beings were in where awakening beings and awakening beings make this vow this inconceivable
wow of wanting to wake up
so that we can be available
two people who
are suffering unnecessarily we make this foul
it's a
it's an urn is unconceivable inconceivable as an inconceivable thou but we make this sale and the reason why we make this fell and i believe i believe inside each one of us here every one of us inside basically has this that we
have this fell in us and the reason we have this l this is because basically fundamentally underneath all of the mistakes underneath all of the suffering underneath all of the difficulty
i think somewhere in there we know fundamentally were basically good
we are
every single one of us
fundamentally basically we are the trungpa says with basic goodness we are this space and goodness our hearts are already open this is this is so our minds are already awake clear as a dell

so why do we have such trouble hannah
being keeping in touch with that why sometimes is it seems so far away well you know why
so far away because though it's aware mind works it's not even our fault
so way the mind works
we have awareness and we identify with that awareness as a me and then we start protecting me we start grabbing onto things that we think are going to make us safe primarily
that we don't really grab my underneath we'd only grab onto things that we think they're going to make us happy mostly were afraid that's really it mostly were scared to death
mostly were grabbing onto things that we think you're going to make are safe
and we push things way that we think they threaten us in some way heard us in some way
so we're so busy covering over our basic openness and our basic weakness that we can't find it

so how do we get back in touch with it that's the question and that's what we're doing here that's what this next practice beers can be all about i understand it's going to be about compassion practices i think but neither blanchard your dinner here her i'm not sure but i think so
carol carol her care is now what the bush years as yeah so it's about compassion practices
so how do we get back in touch with who we really fundamentally are well i'm sorry to deliver that message
don't shoot the messenger
well actually maybe it's good news right if they say it's good news we're in the human realm we suffer here but this is the place we get to be free so actually it's a good news the good news is
that in order to get back in touch with her on fundamental compassion our own open heartedness our own awake mind we go right into our suffering no other way
absolutely no other way so for those of you who are new to the practice get ready
okay cause we're going to start our next practice period which we advertise his all like and flowers and actually it's miserable
he has great potential for being really minerva
which is the good news because we're and whenever we're miserable our mind is stuck and we have created these barriers and that's what we want to see
so the more we're in touch with our own suffering the more we can connect with ourselves in are suffering this is what produces compassion because as the dalai lama said may he be will forever and ever how those permits and take of now
well comfortable anywhere i hope a little on time
i said is just like i don't want to suffer just like that so to all beings not want to suffer and not have the conditions for suffering
he says this all the time and just like i want to be happy
just like that exactly like that every single person in this room besides myself
also in exactly the same way intensity in wanting you know wants to be happy and wants to have the conditions of their happiness
in that way we can connect with other people that connecting his compassion we we
tremble with another person suffering we hear another person's suffering because it's our own we can understand their suffering because we understand our own suffering
and with their compassion we want to take responsibility we want to we want to be in the world taking responsibility and the more we want to take responsibility the more than magical
i don't even know what to call it intention it doesn't seem to reshoot but this magical
he thought that we have inside of us wells up yes i want to awake big why because that's the best way to help all sentient beings that's the most responsible thing we can do to wake up
not for myself anymore because but for everyone who is suffering because i know my own pain i want to wake up
benefit of everybody this is bodhicitta
the fog and waking when lightning to benefit from benefit of opaque

i'm i was then
i'm happy because it's only eight o'clock
and i'm sleep deprived i've been linked to pray for more than thirty years
and i tired of it since the poetry
but it's a very good thing to do for a while it is is they get there isn't as good as because we can't maintain these barriers tiger travel and a lot of that energy that we have goes into maintaining these barriers so it's a little bit okay people can tie it's also ok it until the
your car and i'm almost done
see were naked in front of each other i'm not trying to hide
who time then
toshiba portege adaptogen are pretty sat there
toshiba the classes that are coming up and might the class and i'm going to do which and i i get a kick out of this because i've never done this series before this is i'm i'm getting a kick outta that the class it the serie that are getting a series
the series is about practices compassion practices
i had that side a while ago two three to practice years ago so i thought i started out with compassion practices of the person tradition which is net and loving kindness sympathetic joy compassion and equanimity we started we had clash and there and then from there we moved on
on to low zhong it's you how do you pronounce that low young low john thank low john practices of which series of slogans and of an embedded in that is sending and receiving tomlin practice that we did that and this next one is going to be but
the next one in the series he's going to be about bodhicitta and the parameters because the parameters are
the practices of my yeah nobody sasha
and the first one is the part of me to of giving
and giving is actually the flip side of letting go not holding on or non attachment so giving his the other side of non attachment

and i think the reason why we can practice giving we can practice non attachment is because somehow or another we can trust this basic goodness we can risk
not holding on
we can risk letting go
so out of that basic goodness had of that
two arising of put a cheater we make these vows or as category said we lit a bodhisattva lived in vow we live in now so these vows or the vows of the bodhisattva from the point of view of the perfections
beings are numberless
we don't have to save them because everybody already awake and fundamentally good
delusions are inexhaustible what delusions
delusion is no separate there and if we if we if we understand no separation there are no delusions to
hinder us
dharma gates
from what from here to there now when the mixed all the time no dynamic age
but his way is unsurpassable
if you find out we find out
hey that's our that's our work
good away unsurpassable

so we body surface are going to be practicing together with body surface know that giving is
the awakened mind of a bodhisattva
that this thought of bodhicitta is the motivation of a bodhisattva
and this taking refuge that we do every month just to remind us this is a life of a bodhisattva
these are our mouths
this is our life
he's good

that's how i hope that's encouraging and gonna start this next practice parent again do another one focus be clear about what you're going to be practicing this next practice period and
we're going to do it together support each other
and i'm glad