I want my hand, my shinjutsu, hoto-e-tari. I want my hand, my shinjutsu, hoto-e-tari. I want my hand, my shinjutsu, hoto-e-tari. And unsurpassed, perpetrating, and perfect dharma is compelling where you can get a hundred thousand million calculus. And listen to, to remember and accept. So good evening.

[01:03]

Good evening. Good evening. I was thinking a lot about John King in the past, during this Dharma transmission process. And at some point in the lecture, I was going to mention that I've inherited some of the things that he was given in his Dharma Transmission. And I can almost imagine John saying to me, you know, don't spill anything. So I'm looking at John's Zagu, which has a wet spot on it. It's fairly unbelievable. I was being extra careful coming down, and Rosalie said, well, Mark told me when he was Eno that you have to make the doshi beautiful. And then I saw Steve's eyes, and they got really big. It's this big watermark.

[02:04]

So it's our family, as you're saying. It's our trees. Good evening, and thank you all for coming. I sort of felt this was sort of a Soto family event. That's how I sort of feel about this Dharma transmission process. Through the whole adventure, I feel more connected with people, a deeper connection with people. And that was the overriding feeling every day, a deeper sense of belonging, that this is the place I should be. And that was the... The sense I bring here tonight. So I was thinking, you know, it's like the Soto Dharma transmission picnic. We should all go on a picnic together or something, you know, as one group of practicing and sharing our lives together, which is the heart of our practice, the thing that's really transmitted, you know, the core of our of our sangha life together.

[03:07]

So. For some people, I see some people I haven't seen before, and they wonder what this Dharma transmission stuff is and what this is about. In a way, it's kind of a coming out party for a new lineage holder, you know. And when I think of this brown robe and some other things that are kind of interesting that I didn't bring this time, but I'll share with you if you want to see, and we'll share them together. And you become a lineage holder or someone that holds the tradition and does the best they can to hold this tradition, this Soto tradition that we've inherited. And we call it Soto tradition, but, you know, really it... It probably goes back much further than that when people stopped in the midst of their life, in the midst of some pain and confusion and sat upright and shared their lives wholeheartedly together. So to become a lineage holder is quite a responsibility if you had to do it alone.

[04:17]

Luckily, you don't. You're all here with me. So we share this. obligation and joy together of holding this lineage and keeping our practice intact. But in this role now, I get to have my coming out party where I express the role of lineage holder. Mark Lancaster is my name, for people who don't know me. And my dharma name, and a lot of people might not know it, is Tokuden Shinki. And Tokuden is a virtuous field. And it's a name I've always kind of, I've talked with Michael, I sort of wanted to change it a couple of times, but it's my name, Tokuden Shinki. Virtuous field. And Shinki is true spirit. And Hakuen Zenji, when he talked about his... difficulties, maybe meditation sickness or Zen-bound sickness. He used the word shinki also as heart, the heart of practice or vitality in practice.

[05:21]

And sometimes we say we go for the first name of tokuden, which is uprightness, to some heart or some vitality or some spirit or direct connection with things. And that's been my process, too. stay here with all of you, not to step back or to leave. So this is the traditional lecture given after Dharma Transmission, and it's a, you know, the Dharma Transmission, I was trying to think of how I would describe it. It's maybe a ceremony, I thought, to seal, congratulate, share when someone is accepted. Then I was thinking, accepted is what? And the only thing I could think of is as a human being, that you're modeling your human life or staying in the midst of your human life with all of its imperfections and perfections with other people, willing to open up so people can look in and see.

[06:27]

So to be a human being or to try my best to be a human being is Dharma transmission. So some of my talk tonight will be about what was important to me. And then lots of questions came up for people wanting to know what in the world it meant, what I was doing, what was transmitted. Was I now enlightened? You know, was this it? And how did I feel? And how did I feel about it? So I'll talk about that in as much of the process as I can. Now, the tricky thing here is that the ceremony is largely private. So it's an unusual lecture to give about a private event that is sort of, you use words secret or intimate, that you don't really talk about so much, but I'll do my best. I don't know if there'll be a bell that'll ring if I stray too far, but I don't think so. It'll be in here. I have a sense of what's useful here.

[07:32]

He had a stroke against me, two more to go, two more to go, and then I'm in trouble. So private here, you know, and private here I think means, again, more intimate to me. You know, it's not to exclude people, but some privacy or intimacy between a teacher and a student are necessary. It's a relationship or... an expression that happens when you have this warm connection when people meet face to face. So by that nature it doesn't mean to exclude and yet to have this kind of intimacy there's a need to withdraw in some sense. So this is definitely one aspect of dharma transmission. I was thinking, first I thought you probably noticed I was maybe quieter during the two weeks.

[08:37]

Did anyone notice I was quieter? Anybody? Thank you, Chris. A few people noticed I was quieter. My chairman said, you know, this is going to be really a big job for you, and not talk too much during karma transmission. So I did my best to kind of stay quiet during the two weeks of the process. And there, you know, not speaking and not talking too much about it, I think is pretty wise. The heart of the ceremony itself is in the doing of it. There's really not a big description about it. It's like when people talk about a profound experience in their life where people say, did you have an enlightenment? It's like you have to eat your own food. The flavor is there when you chew it. When you talk about it, it loses energy. It doesn't have any substance.

[09:40]

Not talking, I think, is good. Again, I did my best. Am I doing something bad? I see. I leaned into it. Okay. All right. I bought this, so I'm very sensitive that it works pretty well. No, it's not working. I broke it. Okay. I have a big voice, so I'll talk about it. So I'll talk a little bit about the history. The first recorded transmission, I think some people know this, maybe most people, was that of Buddha and Mahakashapa, his foremost disciple of forest monks. So Mahakashapa had this reputation of being, you know, a serious practitioner of the way, practicing in the old way of practicing alone with deep intent and purpose.

[10:47]

And Buddha is at a vulture peak, and he's about to give a lecture, and perhaps he's going up to the peak, and somebody hands him a flower, or he picks up a flower. And he holds the flower in his hand. I always imagine, and you always have that sweet smile of the Buddha. I imagine sort of a smile as he's maybe holding the flower and moving. And Mahakashapa smiles back, and the Buddha winks. And in our transmission, or in our lineage, this is the first transmission of the Dharma, the true transmission of the Dharma outside of words and speech. And we say, now this is sealed. This transmission is now complete between Buddha and Mahakashapa. And Buddha is supposed to have said something to the effect, I have the treasury of the eye of the truth, the ineffable mind of nirvana. This I entrust now to Mahakashapa. And this version was written, of course, much later in China, maybe a millennia later in China.

[11:54]

And it captures the essence of this intimacy, the playfulness and the joy. And whether it's real or not, I think doesn't to me matter so much. And in fact, the fact that it might be unreal. It is an expression of our true nature that we have right here in this room. It's very powerful because of that. So later, Moomin says, Gold-faced Gautama insolently degrades noble people to commoners. This is his comment on this exchange. He sells dog flesh under the sign of mutton and thinks it's quite commendable, talking about this aspect of transmission. So, what in the world does that mean?

[12:59]

It doesn't sound so good now. It doesn't sound quite so tasty to your dharma transmission. Dog meat and mutton. So, what's he saying here? What's the... What's Moomin's critique or what is he pointing at? So a little bit, I think, is this aspect of nothing sacred here. Shakyamuni is revealing everything, actually, that there is nothing sacred, nothing distinct, nothing separating us from the truth at any moment. It's continually being expressed by all sentient and insentient beings. And that this aspect of hesitating even for a second and stepping back, and you've probably heard this, don't get lost in speculative thought. Don't cling to good or bad. Don't stray from the way right before you.

[14:00]

That these ways are great difficulties, great problems. There is no time in our practice for inhibition. for undue delicacy or of holding back. Life is fleeting. And really there's nothing then to be afraid of. We're just here together. So, Mahakashapa and Buddha were able to express something together in that moment. If not, if there were something separate we would be in real trouble. Something sacred or distinct from us, other than this heart, or this connection, or this expression that we can be part of. And because of that, it's most intimate. Buddha simply recognized what was there, perhaps is another way, in Mahakashapa.

[15:07]

And intimate also, I think, in Daigakus here, Shingetsu is a phrase for intimate. Shingetsu? A phrase maybe? Okay. Oh, good. I was afraid I was ordering tea or something. It would be terrible. Shingetsu is a phrase for intimate, but also it's a way of expressing realization or immediacy or realization. So intimacy and realization both arise and express together. So in case that wasn't enough, you know, that we didn't get the hint, a woman writes a poem. He's a little testy with this grandiose, you know, right Dharma eye and things like that. He says, twirling a flower, the snake shows its tail. Makashapa breaks into a smile and people and devas are confounded. So, again.

[16:11]

Don't worry about rank, acceptance, approbation. Get on with the business of your life, of being here and expressing this way of sincerely practicing together. So Buddha, in his kindness, reveals all. He even shows his monkey's curly little tail so we can see into the secret. And not a word is allowed to come between Mahakashapa and himself. They're that close there. One in that moment, you see. And I was thinking, you know, when I was, years ago, Mel Weitzman was, when Mel was abbot, in a Shosan ceremony, somebody tried to trick him. They were trying to be tricky, and they said, you know, what if the Buddha came into this room and said, what are you doing up there? And, you know, and what's Mel going to answer? And Mel says, I'd say, hey, what are you doing here? This is my time. This is where we practice now.

[17:14]

This is the vitality of no separation. This is the room. This is the practice. This is the heart. And it's also intimate, I was thinking, our practice, both in Dharma transmission and practice, because we are alive and so deeply need each other, need each other's support. And this intimacy is manifested in our tradition by sharing your life with a teacher. Teacher and student, you know, sometimes I think the images of pecking on the outside of the egg, pecking on the inside of the egg until something is born. Work, work, work, work, you know, pecking away, zazen in the morning. Another insight thrown away by the teacher. More work, you know, onwards. But it's the work we do together. And when we truly explore it as sincere practitioners, it's quite joyful.

[18:15]

It's quite fantastic, this process. The paradox is, as Norman once said, we spend our whole practice lives giving up the self we never had. So it's quite tricky how we go about this, quite subtle, with infinite variations of checking with each other, checking with each other, and checking with teacher. We can be open with another, and it takes time, a lot of time, I think. Maybe not for everybody, but for me it takes time. You can begin to open to your own innermost request, to your own true heart. You can kind of level with yourself and not make such a big deal out of it. You can just see yourself, or see this, this. I don't think this can be done alone. I always remembered somebody asked Trungpa Rinpoche, it was a question in a spiritual materialist, and they said, well, you know, there's not really any teacher I like.

[19:23]

There's nobody I'm really interested. Can I just use Marpa, you know, a great yogin of the past, and just read and relate to his questions? And Trungpa said, no chance. Got to be alive. Got to be able to answer you. Got to be able to relate to you right now. You know, got to be able to talk with you. Can't be dead. Can't be a fantasy. Right here. So books don't work. You need this other person, this face-to-face steady mind. I think I can't remember the book that a woman wrote in a psychology book about the mammalian nature of the nature as mammals that we have this and many books have been written that we support and we mirror each other. We need this kind of direct contact, just like a parent. When a child is growing, you see in the eyes of a parent, oh, I'm doing well. Oh, that's so good. And you begin to change. Very subtle changes happen.

[20:24]

So we need this continual mirroring of, and not just words, but a body, actually physically being there together. So this mirroring kind of is what we do. We sit, and then we meet, and we mirror in this way. so that we can have some opening and we can move forward. We seem to need this push so we can finally take, you know, a baby step. One baby step. Without any support. I know we fall over, it's okay. But we take a baby step. No support, no support. Watch me, I'm going to fall. And we need to be watched when we do that. To have the virtue, the uprightness to undertake something of that nature. And at this point I was thinking Michael drew a picture for me that said, Lancaster, getting out of in the way.

[21:31]

Getting out of in the way. Don't block up the doorways and the hallways You know, stay. There's plenty of room. If you stand aside, everything can freely move and express itself. So no need to hang on for dear life. It's craziness. Have to let go. So is it for my history, a big turning point, I feel and I think. Michael Fields, too, was during Rohatsu. This was a long time ago. Well, a long time. It sounds like a culpa or something. It was 11 years. 11 years ago. Mel was Abbott. And I was in Gestrin 32, I still remember. And I was in Rohatsu Sashin. And I had a little picture of Waning, which I had put on a wooden block. And I had taken it out of a book. And I know of Charles Luke. Do people know Charles Luke's books with three books on Chan Buddhism? And the first or second book, There's a cut, a picture of Wei Ning, and it's actually his corpse, lacquered, which was a tradition in China to lacquer saints.

[22:38]

And why I had that picture on a piece of wooden board, I don't know. But anyway, it had a great value to me, so I was up in room 32 with my lacquered board. And I was sitting, and it was a pretty, it felt like it was a great sashim. I mean, from my point of view, it was great. I was sort of wandering around in a state of kind of confusion and euphoria much of the time, I think, writing small, odd poems, you know. And I thought, well, this is it, you know, this is it. And I was waiting, you know, I think I was waiting to be acknowledged by Michael, who was my teacher, and I thought, well, oh, you know, we'll talk. And all during the day, Michael was growing up. from his point of view, and he talked about this in a lecture, rather concerned. I was waiting to be adored. He was willing to go, you know, do we have to call 911? So he did the only thing a good teacher can do.

[23:43]

He started to poke me. And he'd say things like, wow, it must be wonderful to have such insight. And I didn't get it, and I go, well, you know. So I held out. This went on a long time. I mean, you know, we got to dinner. I actually got through dinner, although I was trying to feel a little cranky. I'd been roughed up for about nine hours, you know, subtly tortured a little bit, like, you know. Well, it fooled all of us, you know. We thought you were maybe involved here. I said, what does he mean by fooled all of us? Is that some subtle way of... Relating to me? Anyway, so this goes on and on and on until I'm sort of knocked off center. I can't even stay. So finally I said, it must have been about eight, the whole thing's over, and I must have looked perplexed, and I said, ow, that hurt my feelings. You hurt my feelings.

[24:45]

I have feelings. I'm a human being. And he didn't go, whew. But later when he's talked about it, he hasn't used my name, so now you know who this guy is. He said, and after that, he said, I knew we could work together. I knew there was some chance we could make some progress. So that's a big change, to touch the human heart in that way. So good teachers do that sometimes. So maybe if you get roughed up a little bit, a little bit as a teacher trying to hold you, you know, to guide you, to help out. And that was 11 or 12 years ago. So it's not like, well, the work's done. I still had my picture. I packed it up and took it home, you know, and I still kept it. Although it never tasted the same. It was just kind of heavy.

[25:47]

And then one day I thought, I'm carrying the corpse of Wayne Ng around on my back. Rotten corpse, you know. And then I think, I think, see, if you practice wholeheartedly, you meet the ancestors eyeball to eyeball, face to face. I got a corpse on my back. This isn't so good. So a good teacher bumps you with this and knocks you off balance a little so you can find your true footing. You can have some traction in your practice. So it takes a long time. So I was going to say, you never know where things are going to lead, you know. I thought, you know, and I spent all the time actually trying to leave. Ever since I arrived, I realized I've been trying to leave in one way or another. You know, I got in the door 20 years ago. And actually, I knew immediately I was a goner as soon as we did the robe chant or the chant before a lecture.

[26:48]

But in some way or another, I've always been trying to get out. to get off the hook. They really don't like me. So I had endless things, ways to create buffers. Michael's been very good at letting them stay for a while and then taking them down. You don't need that anymore. You don't need that buffer. You can take that down. You're a little stronger than that. Even on my ordination, which was in 2002, when you get your Oquesa, I actually was sitting in the Zendo next to Dana, and I was thinking, is it too late to say no? We were within 40 minutes of the ceremony, and I was still hedging, like, is there any way to get out of this? I mean, is this really for me? I'm probably not going to be a good priest, you know? Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. I was going out. I was torturing myself. I was sweating, you know, because I was nervous. Of course you get nervous when you're leading two lives, and you're...

[27:51]

back and forth. It's quite frightening. I just couldn't take my medicine. So I was still going, I don't know, I don't know. So who knows where things will lead if you just keep on practicing. This way you can end up like this. Just keep doing your best and be willing to make mistakes and be honest about them. Check them out. So a good teacher comes back and checks us in our story, you know. Oh, so that's what you think. And works with us to open the story up so we can look at it. Not to take it away, but so we can turn and look at our stories. Too much we maybe get a little paranoid. Who is this guy, you know? It's a little paranoid probably to Michael, but I trusted Michael. That's big. You have to trust. You have to have that connection. And I was thinking, too, you trust, but also you are aware of what brought you.

[28:56]

What got you to the dance? I was pretty clear when I came through the door. When I came through the door, the biggest overriding reason was I realized I couldn't guarantee my own happiness. I didn't guarantee anything, let alone my own happiness. So knowing that, there was really nowhere. Once you know that, there's nowhere else to go. So I was really on the hook, actually, when I stepped through the door. I could go back out, but I knew I would just do the loop. It wasn't going to work. So I knew that. So in a way, my painful karma pushed and my good karma said, come on in. Come on in. It's not so simple as good karma and bad karma. It's quite complex. And the big thing, and I'll move on here, the big thing is not worrying, I think, when you work with a teacher. I think the teacher comes up here is, you know, don't, is it the best teacher?

[29:59]

Is the teacher always right? Who knows? You know, I think that, of course, you have some idea. I mean, you think, I can relate to this person. That's important. I'm learning. That's good. But the big thing is, as Dogen says, take in the teaching completely. Swallow it whole. Half measures don't help with medicine, you know. Take your medicine completely. You can always spit it out later. You can always, you know. Michael and I said, I don't know about that. So, you know, you can always take it in. Examine it deeply, you know, not in a superficial way. With great thoroughness, examine what's being given to you, you know, when you get teaching. That's right. In this way, we worry about the perfect situation, the perfect teacher, the perfect time, but we forget the thing that we actually can do something about the perfect student. That's what you can be. It doesn't matter who runs Zen Center, if you get a brown robe or a purple robe.

[31:02]

Who cares? In the end, who really cares what you get? Life is pretty short. The big thing is to make this effort. to wake up, to see things as they are, to be sincere in that way and to take in the teaching. I'm going to move on. I haven't even gotten to the Dharma transmission, so there's a lot of bowing and that's it. No, I'm sorry. I'll give you a little bit more, a little bit more so that you won't be stunned when it happens to you. Just a little bit more, because people are very curious. So at some point, your teacher says, you know, I think we can be honest, maybe. We can relate to each other now. And you can listen. Are you really going to stay here? And I'm going to do this. I'm going to pass this on to you. But not today. Let's spend a few years and study together now. We'll get out the books and all. So studying is, of course, there's the studying.

[32:05]

We read the transmission documents. And you can read... In A Moon and a Dewdrop, the different fascicles, you know, transmission. But it's also the time spent together, just the intimate time spent together, doing nothing always so important, you know, eating apple pie, you know, walking somewhere, opening your books, reading a little bit, you know, falling asleep. It's the intimacy of that quiet time. It's a... a growth or a change that happens. But you read, and you do study them. And there is some, it's not, you don't become a Zen, I mean, I went in not a Buddhist scholar, I certainly came out not a Buddhist scholar, but you have some familiarity, a teacher wants to know, you have some sense of Dogen, you have some sense of the core teaching, so you do spend time doing that. It's not an acknowledgment, now your problems are solved, your psyche is intact forever, you're some transcendent being, but that you can hold your ground, you can stay here, you can abide on the ground that you practice on, and you can be entrusted.

[33:29]

with this teaching. I asked Steve Allen when we were in Crestone, Michael and Nadine and I were in Crestone, and I asked Steve Allen, you know, what did you think was important about Dharma? What's the feeling you had with Dharma transmission? And he said, deep reverence. And he said, but it's not about the papers and the stuff behind the curtains. Deep reverence for the tradition of Zazen. Deep reverence for the tradition of Sashin. deep reverence for this practice, the importance of this practice, that you could be holding it now and you're entrusted with it formally. And part of entrustment is that also you can see your shadow. You're not, you know, everything's great, I'm a great guy. You can see the shadow, the problems you still have, things that you need to work with. You have some balance now in your life. You don't get lost, maybe. You feel you're not going to get lost in your shadow or be buffaloed by it.

[34:33]

You can push through. So each morning in the transmission process, you do a jundo. You walk through the building and you go to all of the altars and you make an offering and you bow with the help of many friends. I read a few names. Many friends. And it ends in the courtyard. And my favorite part, actually, was the courtyard where you make a large gesture, including temple and everybody in. And you hold everything. And always I felt, ah, buildings, stones, leaves, people, the coffee pot, the students, they all express the Dharma ceaselessly, inanimate objects, all expressing Dharma. We do it together. And I felt very connected, very warm. And so there's a deep bowing almost continually during the day.

[35:34]

You come in here and you bow to all of, and I bowed to all of the patriarchs, and then I did all the matriarchs. Who asked me that? Was it a wrench? And he said, well, should we do all the women? I said, well, I had a mother. So I said, let's do all the women. So we bowed to all the women. And for a while it was great. And then it was like, it's a lot of bowing. And then it was just a lot of bowing, but it's great. Incense, a lot of bowing, incense, pretty wonderful. And then you have a room, you go to, you're sequestered in a room somewhere, and you draw, you do calligraphy on silk, white silk with ink. with little brushes with bristles that shoot out. I went over to Flax immediately after my first day and I got, I said, I got it, I'm gonna get like these, I bought this selection of these little tiny brushes and I came back and it doesn't help.

[36:37]

Soak's unbelievable, it leaps around, it moves up and down, it undulates. You know, if the ink's not right, it just makes a huge blot. So your first intention is, mine's going to be perfect. I'm going to do my best. And after about an hour, it's like, I've got to keep going. I just have to do my best. And when it's quite joyful, it's quite alive. All the bony feet and faces and hands and the lives of all the ancestors, we're just doing our best together over and over. And then there are two final ceremonies. One was on the 29th, where you're given, and the precept matter is essential to what we do, receiving the precepts, the support of standing upright and then helping other people to stand upright. And then on the 29th, one night you're given the ability to then give precepts to others. And then the next night, after everybody is asleep, you have your final ceremony.

[37:43]

And I won't tell you what that is because you have to wait and do it yourself. But it's quite wonderful. Quite human. That's the thing, quite human. And I would say it's in a room with red silk. So it's like being in a huge womb. Being in a huge womb. It's quite intimate, quite alive. And we all felt that night. We talked a little afterwards. You have a cup of tea about midnight. He said, you know, we remembered, it felt like Hekizan, Tang Giurando, who was a priest here and died 10 years ago this year, and Kanshin, John King, who died August 9th, were both there, had some presence. I don't know what there means. It doesn't matter what there means. There was a presence there, a feeling, a connection with these two. and a gratitude for their friendship and their heart.

[38:46]

That was the big gift they all had, heart and generosity. And John, thank God, Zaku is dry and untouched. I'm looking at it. I was afraid, oh, God, could that be bleach? So it's fine. And Zanki also allowed me to have all of John's, you know, And there's Kotsu, the small curved stick. So I have inherited all of John's things, which is great. Great to wave them around in the world to do my best. So I just want to end. I have to end by saying thank you. Can I say thank you? First, thank you to everybody for coming and being part of this. And then I want to thank a few people. So, Tanya and Mary and David. This is how many people it takes to do a Jundo.

[39:48]

And Melinda and Joanne and Mimi. Jay, Keith, Joe, Johan, Tom, Gita, Stephen, James, Abby, Li Ping, Jeffrey. Sambu. I still don't know who Dancer is. I think that's spelled right. Lucy. Gwen. Will. Marvin. Molly. Lisa. Carol. I think, did I get everybody? Anybody feel left out? So those are all of the people that go with you and help you every day. And thank you deeply for getting up during interim. the second week a year when you can sleep in, and they all got up and said, we'll walk, we'll do this with you. I want to thank, I left Nadine's name off. She did two tours of duty, but a deep gratitude to my wife, Nadine, who's sitting in the corner.

[40:51]

She's been, since I've been here, she's always been supporting this, even if she wasn't always so sure what in God's name I was doing. When I was so 10 years ago, she would wake me up. She would get up a half an hour before I got up at four, because I had to come here to wake everyone else up and say, wake up. I've got to have this sleep. Get it going. You've got to ring the bell. Drive over and ring the bell. So she'd do that group after a week. Wake up. You're sleeping again. I can't believe it. Wish you so, for God's sake. Don't you think anything serious? So deep, deep boughs, even, yeah, deep boughs. Zinke Blanche Hartman for the third round of sewing, and I've sewed things to my clothes, upside down, and you've always been patient, like, oh, well, we can fix that. She said, we can fix that. She spent an afternoon taking stitches out, so we can fix that, too. And to Gigan Vicky Austin, I don't know if you can make, there she is in the corner, for all of the work.

[41:57]

I helped take down the Red Room, as I call it. Tremendous amount of work to set this up. So deep bowels for all of the work and the care you put into that. The humor you brought to it, so that when they checked my work, it was like... Oh, I'm really bad. It's like, that's not how we spell Dogen. That's Dagon. I'd have to start over. She was always kind of, oh, it looks good. Wrong name. So thank you for that. And then finally to my heart or root teachers and in a diary of Michael Wenger for pushing and pulling, pushing and pulling and listening to all of these stories for so long. and never giving up. Thank you very much. Ciao. And that's it.

[43:01]

There is no more empty. Thank you very much. May your attention equally extend to every big place where

[43:22]

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