Good morning. Good morning. So first of all, I'd like to thank everybody who contributed last week. Last week, for those of you who weren't here, the Eno, I think it was more or less a spontaneous horizon, said all the money that goes into the donation box will donate to Relief in Haiti. And then I thought, I can probably get somebody to match that. which we did. Anyway, we raised $2,800 and we had a matching grant of $2,500. So thank you everybody who donated last week. You know, it's my own thought though, even though that's just a drop in the bucket. Let's face it, the nation has been utterly devastated there without all the basic services and without homes.

[01:03]

water and schools and hospitals and everything else, apparently. Still, to offer what we can offer is, I think, what makes our lives connected, you know, to do our bit, no matter how small. Still, it is what it is. It has its own fullness, its own completeness. And that sense that it connects us. I think we receive as we give. That we connect, it opens our hearts. It lets us see and experience how interwoven our lives are and how fragile our situations are.

[02:08]

This is an earthquake city. What would it be like for us if everybody north of Gary Street was killed in an earthquake tomorrow? And can we not shrink back into a kind of fearful denial, but more move forward with a courageous compassion? OK, life is fragile, impermanent, uncertain. Let's treasure it. Let's meet each other as if each one of us is a treasure, is worth it. our support and our kindness and our generosity. So thank you. And I hope we can all keep our hearts open and not forget Haiti, you know, when it's no longer a news item next week when something else comes along.

[03:25]

So here at City Center, we're starting something called a practice period. The notion of a practice period that we have is a carryover of the Buddhist tradition. When in India, when they had the monsoons and it was too wet to go anywhere, they said, well, let's take advantage of that. Let's just stay here and meditate. Since we can't go anywhere. And... we carry on that tradition and say, well, let's designate this time as a period of time to put some extra attention and effort into our practice. The theme of the practice period is a theme that is in many ways fundamental in the Buddhist tradition. and the Kali words are sila, samadhi, panya, which translate, here's my translation, sila is the conduct that expresses and supports liberating awareness.

[04:55]

And samadhi is the attention and engagement that to momentary experience that's the fundamental involvement in being alive that sets the stage for the insight and realization as to how to live our life fully in an engaged and connected way. And it's my hope that in mentioning this practice period, most of the people signed up for the practice period are residents. It's a whole lot easier to walk down the stairs to the Zendo in the morning than it is to come across time.

[06:02]

But I'd really like to encourage you who don't live here to avail yourselves of this opportunity as works for your life. there's a series of events that form the backbone of the practice period. Meditation practice, a schedule of Dharma talks, and other events and classes that will expand and explore this theme of Sila Samadhi Panya. and also offer us a way to support each other's practice. The marvelous thing about practicing together is that at the same time, we receive support and we give support. You know, today there's about 70 of us who are going to sit all day.

[07:06]

And I think the majority of us, without the support of the other people sitting with them, would probably, you know, give up somewhere in the afternoon. But with each other's support, with each other's example and connection to each other, we do it. So how do we do that? as we engage our lives in the complexities of how they are. You know, I do half the yoga, and so do both of my grown children, and we subscribe to Yoga Journal. There's interesting articles on yoga, but also

[08:11]

I think of Yoga Journal as a very interesting kind of teaching. Especially the ads in Yoga Journal. There's everything from fashionable clothes to healthy foods to how to detox, how to go for the beautiful places for wonderful retreats. And it is true in Yoga Journal most of the people modeling the various activities happen to be extraordinarily handsome and beautiful. But I think it touches something about the complexity of our lives.

[09:17]

There are a variety of priorities, a variety of agendas in our lives that we have to attend to. Have to make a living, have to try to stay healthy, have to get some exercise, eat well, keep up your relationships. And then in the midst of that, meditate all the time. How do you do it? And it's my hope that city center can be a sanctuary a place to come and touch and connect with other practitioners. A practice place is like a living mandala.

[10:24]

A mandala is an organized expression of the material world that expresses the wisdom of the Dharma, the wisdom of the teachings of liberation. You know, the chant we did at the start of lecture, well, when I was away, Jordan, the Tanto, you know, when I was away in the fall, he dropped the Japanese. And I reintroduced it. And here's my rationale for reintroducing it. The chant in Japanese is like a mantra.

[11:30]

A mantra is engaging sound with body and breath and mind in a way that aligns them with the nature of what is. And the fact that most of us don't speak Japanese and don't actually know what we're chanting, I think is a good thing. I think certainly in the West, thinking and knowing are very important to us. but sometimes to the detraction of experiencing beyond thinking. What we feel, what we experience directly, how we're touched and moved by each other's physical presence, how we're touched and moved by what's happening in Haiti. I would say it's not so much what we figure out

[12:35]

in relationship to it, or what we conclude from it, how we weigh it up in terms of good or bad. Of course, these have their place. But there's something about simple presence that has an authority and a potency. Maybe it could be said something like looking at the world with a sense of wonder or a sense of heritage. And that when we chant in Japanese, we touch back. We touch back to the heritage. not only of Japan, not only of China, not only of India, but something in the wisdom of our being since we've come together as a species, and maybe before we came together as a species.

[13:53]

For me, this poem by Gary Oliver is a wonderful expression of trying to appreciate and attend to and align with that. Even now, I remember something. The way a flower in a jar of water remembers its life in the perfect garden. The way a flower in a jar of water remembers its life as a closed seat. The way a flower in a jar of water steadies itself, remembering itself. Long ago, the plunging roots, the gravel, the rain, the glossy stem, the wings of the leaves, the swords of the leaves, rising and clashing. For the rose of the sun, the salt of the stars, the crown of the wind, the beds of the clouds, the blue dream, the unbreakable circle.

[15:00]

We're part of this extraordinary heritage. And we're unique as a species. And we're unique as an individual. How can we take the challenge of balancing exercise, work, relationships, eating healthily, whatever else is part of the priorities of your daily life. How can we engage it consciously and still attend to and nourish something fundamental in our being? And it's our hope at City Center and all our centers, of course.

[16:15]

But I think City Center being in the hub, being in the midst of urban life, how to offer a place that is both a sanctuary that allows you to pause, take a deep breath, and connect. hmm, what am I doing with my life? How am I arranging these priorities? How do I not just let some sense of imbalance perfume my existence? And in a way, this is the exact activity of zazen. To pause, to connect, to notice, to release.

[17:18]

With whatever comes up. And in that process, through just experiencing it, through being connected to it, to discover to realize something fundamental about our human life. And then practice period is to take that essential activity and create a context, to create a living mandala that supports us all to do that together. And certainly, as I've mentioned before, 2,500 years ago in the time of Shakyamuni, the opportunity to go into the woods and sit under a tree was quite close.

[18:38]

And I think now, as a species, that most of us are in an urban environment, we have an interesting kind of challenge. How do we carry the essence of that same practice into an urban environment? How do we discover things like when you enter your apartment after a day at work, Come through the door and pause and notice where you are. And notice how it feels to be where you are. Notice how it feels to be in that interface between your previous activity and coming home. What is it to get into your car and to pause before you put your key in the ignition and speed off into your life and all the urgencies and demands of it?

[19:56]

What is it to relate to each person in your life? Not knowing how long this relationship is going to last. or not even assuming that you know who this person is and how they think and feel. The interesting thing about practice is it's always very close. And amazingly, it's very easy to miss the opportunity. And the other amazing thing about it is that when we engage it, we're deeply nourished. But there's something about pausing that we don't like to do. We have too much to do.

[21:05]

We have too many things that we want to do or get away from or change or something. So it's very helpful to have some process that helps to bring us back to the tension between that, the doing of our life and the being of our life. So practice period is to say, okay, I am going to look at that. And I would encourage you, especially those of you, who don't live here in the building or who can't make the time to come on a regular basis. To also think about, how can I carry that into my life? Remember when someone said to me, here's how I do my household chores.

[22:15]

I set aside a period of time, and for them it was Saturday morning. I turn off the telephone, and the computer, and the radio, and I just say, for this period of time, I'm going to do my laundry, I'm going to clean up, I'm going to go shopping at the store, And it's all going to be a mindfulness practice. How do we take the everyday activities and let them draw us back into the relationship between doing and being? So that chant we do at the start of lecture.

[23:25]

This is part of the stoolfulness of having a mnemonic. Oh yeah, that's right. That's what I intend. A way of remembering. What is it that helps us to embody in our own lives Mary Oliver's sentiment? Now I remember. Now I remember what's important to me. Now I remember the kind of person I would like to be. Now I remember what nourishes me in my being. Now I remember the way I would like to breathe and stand and think and feel. and walk, and sit, and relax, and enjoy, and engage.

[24:32]

And not to turn that into a tyrant or a harsh taskmaster, but something more like a flower. Part of what intrigues me about this poem is that The image, the central point, the central theme is a flower. Who can get upset with a flower, right? Who can feel bullied or coerced or intimidated? But as we face the impossible task of meeting all our priorities and agendas, successfully, completely. Often there's an uneasiness, there's an anxiety, there's a distress. How do we remember how to meet that skillfully?

[25:50]

How to think, oh, this is the tension between doing and being. It's not requesting some rigidity, some harshness. It's not about self-deprivation. It's something that is exacting, but it's also something that's intrinsically wise and generous. I was just thinking, I haven't quite got to what I wanted to talk about yet. But this, in a way, exemplifies the nature of our practice.

[26:52]

You sit down and do Zazen and you think, okay, I'm going to sit here, I'm going to sit here upright and expansive in body, with the flowing breath, flowing in the night, each inhale and exhale, being with a great wave of being. And then something happens. But when the intention is initiated, the capacity to meet what happens with awareness... is enhanced. So to carry, to initiate the intention, however we can initiate it, and then to carry it into your life. Like I find when I took up the practice of pausing before I turned on the ignition in my car,

[27:58]

that somehow it just wasn't that easy to completely drop where I thought I was going and how quickly I had to be there. But I could start to taste it and see it. It brought into relief the tension between being and doing. It started to reveal how I take up with what urgency I take up moving through, moving forward, getting somewhere, accomplishing something, what that means to me in my life. So our intention sets us on a journey of discovery. So sila Samadhi Panya.

[29:08]

Sila. The skillful behavior that supports that process and expresses it. What in your work do you need to do to clarify the intention for your life? What inner work do you need to do to return to? Would that be a good practice to pause when you enter the door of your home each evening or pause when you leave your home in the morning? Would it be a good practice as you go through your day to truly say thanks to all the people that serve you, you know?

[30:09]

Whether it's the bus driver, the person who sells you a coffee, or opens a door at a store, or whatever. Or the ambulance driver who drives quickly to take care of someone who's in emergency. That could be one of us the next ambulance goes to. What's the behavior? What's the practice? What's the conduct that supports that kind of remembering? Is it meditating daily? Is it doing yoga daily? Going running daily? turning off the TV a little bit earlier and going to bed earlier so you get more sleep?

[31:13]

What is it? Who knows better than you how that should take place? Not to say you can't search for advice, information, inspiration, support. Of course, we all need that. There is a deeply personal process, something about aligning our hearts and our minds and finding the sila within the circumstances of our own life. And I would say not to take it up, as I said before, as a harsh taskmaster. Oh, yeah, I'm really screwing up. I should be a better person. It's my experience in practicing and helping others to practice.

[32:20]

Self-criticism has a very limited usefulness. If you can find ways to inspire yourself and encourage yourself, it's enormously more effective to ask yourself, what inspires and encourages me? I think it's a much more helpful question. And then I would say, as you start to make contact with that, don't neglect it. Remember it. Go back to it. What was that again? And find ways to sprinkle it throughout your day. Make a game out of it. Okay, this activity really annoys me and I have to do it every day. Hmm. How can I relate my inspiration and encouragement to that?

[33:23]

And please think of us as a resource. both in coming here for Dharma talks and meditation, but also, if you wish, you can follow the talks on the web or the classes. We're still struggling to get that in an efficient manner, but it's on its way. And certainly, no... For our classes and our workshops, we charge a fee. But please don't ever hold back from coming because of money. If you can't pay, that's fine. Come anyway.

[34:33]

And if you can pay ten times over, don't do that. You know, really, I mean, it's like... And as you do it, think, OK, nine more people can come for free. But on the other side, I know this is an economic hard time. Don't limit your participation for financial reasons. Our financial model is a mix. Partly we're earning income and dependent upon donations. It's a mix. But certainly also remember, the Dharma talks are free, the meditation's free. You're always welcome to come here and avail yourself of the living as a sanctuary. So sila.

[35:38]

And let me, for the sake of completeness, just briefly say something about samadhi and panya. So for us, the practice of zazen, for us, the practice of zazen includes all three. In the discipline, in the cultivation of consciousness, in creating the capacity to attend to the moment, to connect to the moment, to experience the moment. the discipline of discovering how to give attention to what's arising. This is an integral part of Zazen. There are a variety of ways to attend to your body, attend to your breath, attend to your thought process.

[36:50]

And over the course of the practice period, as I teach a class, I will endeavor to talk and explain those processes. And often, as you start to meditate, and as you continue to meditate, deliberate effort and control get mixed together. Zazen is not about controlling your experience, but it is about intentional engagement. To fully experience what's happening now. And again, there's a tension between those two. And to stay attuned... so that it's not too loose and too tight.

[37:52]

Too loose, the mind and attention wander all over the place. Too tight, it becomes about an issue of control. It's a better notion to think of continuous contact with what arises. what's happening now. Continually opening to experience it. That undermines the natural tendencies of mind to choose this versus that and to grasp what it chooses and to push away what it doesn't choose.

[38:54]

It undermines the natural tendency of mind to judge, get caught up in its own conclusions and what's happening now. And attending the body and breath offer themselves as an attunement to expressing wordlessly, directly, what's happening now and experiencing the response. And as we do that, the nature of what is literally becomes apparent. Thoughts and feelings are in a state of constant flux, arising and falling away. And as they arise, they bring into being a particular expression of reality.

[40:12]

And as they fall away, that expression of reality falls away and another one appears. without exception. And within that, there is a visceral thread, an urgency, and a deep wish to exist. And when we grasp it, it's limited, and when we open, consciousness, it becomes abundant. But the wisdom of that, the realization of that, is not within the realm of thinking. It's in the realm of experiencing. And this is the insight, the realization, the wisdom beyond wisdom of the practice, that kanya, prajna.

[41:23]

is the term that expresses it. Okay. But let me end by reading this poem again. Even now, I remember something. The way of flower in a jar of water remembers its life in the perfect garden. The way a flower in a jar of water remembers its life as a closed seed. The way a flower in a jar of water steadies itself, remembers itself. Long ago, the plunging roots, the gravel, the rain, the glossy stem, the wings of the leaves, the swords of the leaves, rising and clashing from the rose of the sun, the salt of the stars, the crown of the wind, the beds of the clouds, the blue dream, the unbreakable circle.

[42:40]

Thank you.

[42:42]

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