The speaker this morning is Sokaku Cathy Fisher. Sokaku-san, whenever you're ready, we can begin with the sutra opening verse. Man unsurpassed, penetrating and perfect dharma is rarely met with, even in a hundred thousand million kaupas. having it to see and listen to, to remember and accept. I vow to taste the truth of the Tathagata's words. Good morning, everyone. For if some of you are in the afternoon, good afternoon. And welcome to second day of Sashin.

[01:05]

For some of you, the strangest session you have ever sat. And I hope everyone is feeling settled and refreshed by this rare gift of session. And I hope everyone is taking good care of themselves. in whatever way you need. Today, I want to talk about Zazen. In Zui Munki, Dogen discusses Zazen in the last talk of book five. And I'm going to read the whole talk to you. The most vital concern in learning the way is to practice Zazen. In China, many people attain the way entirely through the power of zazen. If one concentrates on practicing zazen continuously, even an ignorant person who does not understand a single question can be superior to an intelligent person who has been studying for a long time.

[02:19]

Therefore, practitioners must practice shikantaza, wholeheartedly, without bothering to concern themselves with other things. The way of the Buddhas and ancestors, by the way, I'm taking the liberty to change patriarchs to ancestors. The way of the Buddhas and ancestors is nothing but zazen. Do not pursue anything else. At the time, Eijo asked, in learning both sitting and reading, when I read the collections of the old master's sayings or koans, I can understand one thing out of a hundred or a thousand words, though I have never had such an experience in zazen. Should we still prefer to practice zazen? Dogen replied,

[03:25]

Even if you may seem to have some understanding while reading koans, such studies will lead you astray from the way of the Buddhas and ancestors. To spend your time sitting upright with nothing to be gained and nothing to be realized is the way of the ancestors. Although the ancient masters encouraged both reading and shikantaza, They promoted sitting wholeheartedly. Although there are some who have gained enlightenment hearing stories of the masters, the attainment of enlightenment is due to the merit of sitting. True merit depends on sitting. And that's the talk. To spend your time sitting upright with nothing to be gained and nothing to be realized is the way of the ancestors.

[04:37]

This is like a Dogen bumper sticker. Sit upright with nothing to be gained, nothing to be realized. Sojin Mel Weitzman Moshi often spoke of non-gaining mind, non-gaining idea. When Suzuki Roshi spoke of sincerity in our practice, that's the meaning of nothing to be gained or realized. Dōken also says, utmost effort and sincerity in his writings. Sincerity is really the operative word. Sincerity means doing what we do without needing anything in return. doing just for the doing, doing out of love, doing out of commitment, not for the reward or the recognition or the return on our investment.

[05:40]

There aren't so many examples of a word which means what we are doing here. In our explanations, we more often come at it in the negative, what we are not doing, like not gaining, non-attachment, no-self, emptiness. Negative words can leave us more room, in a way, more space. But they can also designate what sounds like a list of can'ts and don'ts, restrictions which can feel controlling, So if you need a good word, which is open and beautiful, try using sincerity, which we also do not attach to. The last sentence of that talk gives a hint as to the subtlety of his point when Dogen uses the word true merit.

[06:52]

True merit comes from the perfections. like the perfection of giving, in which there is no giver, no gift, no receiver. The perfection of giving is like giving the flowers from a distant mountain. The flowers are not mine. They're not even here. And they are already given. The perfection of giving is not about subject, verb, object. true merit depends on sitting, because it is the seat of non-gaining, of utmost dynamic sincerity. In Book 5, Talk 18, Dogen also speaks of Zazen. Dogen instructed, Zen master Dai-e,

[07:56]

said, you must practice the way with the attitude of a person owing a vast debt and being forced to return it despite being penniless. If you have this frame of mind, it is easy to attain the way. In the Xin Jin Mei, which is Xin Xin Ming in Chinese, we read, the supreme way is not difficult. Just refuse to have preferences. Only when you cast aside the mind of discrimination will you be able to accept it immediately. To cast aside discriminating mind is to depart from ego. And Dogen goes on. Do not think that you learn the Buddha Dharma for the sake of some reward for practicing the Buddha way. Just practice the Buddha Dharma for the sake of the Buddha Dharma.

[09:01]

Even if you study a thousand sutras and 10,000 commentaries on them, or even if you have sat zazen until your cushion is worn out, it is impossible to attain the way of the Buddhas and ancestors if this attitude is lacking. Just casting body and mind into the Buddha Dharma and practicing along with others without holding onto previous views, you will be in accordance with the way immediately. And that's the end of that talk. The language of these instructions from centuries and centuries ago, from Kamakura Japanese to 20th and 21st century English in different translations may come across as harsh or extreme.

[10:04]

We don't know if we're hearing Dogen or Ejo or the impact of language traveling through time. So we take in these instructions as we find them. We allow them to seep in. have the impact they do supporting our practice, generating questions and questioning. For example, the part about how we must have the attitude of someone paying off a large debt despite being penniless, and that it is easy to attain the way if you have this attitude. I've known people who have lost their homes in fires, and I remember a few of them had this aura of transcendent freedom afterwards, even though they had lost every object and every record of their lives.

[11:13]

It's a vulnerable moment, to say the least. in a person's life, losing everything, to lose a friend or a family member. These are the kinds of losses that break us open, that shift the whole universe. So is that the attitude Dogen is reporting from Dai A, casting body and mind into the Buddha Dharma? That sounds pretty extreme. and hard to conjure each and every day of our practice lives. I'd like to offer another metaphor, yet another metaphor for our practice in Sangha. One that helps me anyway.

[12:17]

You know, Zen is a bit strange. because we have so many forms and customs and protocols that we must learn, that will cause us discomfort in the community until we learn. Yet, when we sit down for zazen, our practice is formless. No step-by-step plan, no way to see how I'm doing, if I'm even doing it right. And this can be equally disconcerting, especially in contrast to when we stand up and move around, returning to our structured environment. So I like to think of practice and Sangha life as an artist's colony. Each of us is committed and passionate in our work, our Zazen practice. Our work is not about getting it right, more about discovering work that comes from the inside out and therefore learning to trust ourselves in the work and find courage to do the work as it has never been done before.

[13:41]

Yet we are not trying to do something because it has never been done before. Our doing what has never been done before is what comes of working from the inside out with trust and courage. Tenderness and a sense of humor are equally helpful. And each of our work is completely our own. We don't, we're not working on the same project at the same time. We are in some sense, but when we go and sit down in our cushion, we're just all there with ourselves. What we do together when we stand up is to support ourselves and each other in our commitment,

[14:48]

and passion for the work. We protect and respect each other's work and the space that contains it and sustains it. We do whatever is needed for the community and we learn the forms and protocols to support our practice together as an artist's colony. There's no need for comparisons among us, no need for competition. Rather, lots of encouragement, open-hearted attention, and respect in support for the community in which we are supported for the work, which requires unwavering commitment and passion. In that talk, talk number 18, book five, the supreme way is not difficult. just refused to have preferences.

[15:51]

It's from the Xin Xin Ming, which is translated as a faith in mind. It's a long poem. And it's credited to Sang Tan, the third ancestor, which would make him Bodhidharma's Dharma grandson. He lived in the sixth century. and received Dharma transmission from Hui Ka. Hui Ka was Bodhidharma's successor, and Hui Ka was the one that Bodhidharma said, you have my marrow, a story I told a couple days ago. So he received Dharma transmission from Hui Ka during a period of political persecution of Buddhism and Buddhists, big time. and he was forced to live in hiding. Later on, when things eased up, he was visited by the young monk Daoxin, who asked Sang San this question.

[17:01]

I asked for the master's compassion. Please tell me of the gate of emancipation. Sang San replied, who has bound you? Daoxin said, no one has bound me. Sun Tan said, then why are you seeking emancipation? From this conversation, Daoxin awakened at age 14. And because, excuse me, became Sun Tan's heir. Daoxin's heir was Hongran. the teacher of Hui Nung, our woodcutter poet from the South. The more famous use of the saying from the Xin Xin Ming is translated, the ultimate way is without difficulty, just avoid picking and choosing.

[18:14]

It's by the 8th and 9th century Zhaozhou. And this is from Koan No. 2 of the Hekigan Roku, the Blue Cliff Record. In this conversation, Zhaozhou, after quoting that line about not picking or choosing, has some back and forth with the monk conversation and then says further, this old monk does not abide within clarity. by which he seems to be saying, do not take a fixed position, or as Dogen says, without holding on to previous views. So it's not that anyone has a problem with clarity or even views. It is the holding on, the attachment, taking a fixed position and holding to it. that blinds us to the depth and the breadth of our lives.

[19:21]

For me, there's a theme, a human theme that emerges and flows through these koan conversations, the ones that Dogen advises against reading. You know, Dogen was an accomplished scholar, as was Ejo. Dogen admitted to enjoying literature and poetry, even though he didn't recommend it for others. Back in book two, talk eight, he said, it was meaningless and should be abandoned. But he didn't abandon poetry, he loved it. The emerging theme I'm speaking about was expressed by Daoxin. Please tell me of the gate of emancipation. Or Zhaozhou's question to Nanchuan. If I'm going in the wrong direction, how do I practice? The theme to me is of longing.

[20:32]

I have been ruminating on the word longing lately for months. And I think I talked about it the other day in connection with longing for chocolate and noticing that even when I get the chocolate, the longing remains. So for me, when I find myself bathed in a feeling or image that is uncomfortable, one that my first impulse might be to get rid of this thing, instead, I practice bringing to mind the thought, how many people on the face of the earth are feeling the same way right now? How many are longing? And we can hear something like the song of longing, an anthem, which has always been there. especially during the pandemic.

[21:42]

Think of longing for lost loved ones, for the longing to be with them and care for them up to their death. Think of the longing to breathe as people die of COVID, scared, alone, and unable to breathe. Think of George Floyd. and so many others who died unable to breathe at the hand of another person. So I'm thinking that longing is a constant among us. Our reasonable and habitual response is to seek what we think we are longing for, which is usually something we don't have, something that is difficult to acquire. so we feel sad and deprived. I'm experimenting in my own language with using the word longing for suffering, the first noble truth.

[22:54]

All life is suffering. Suffering is caused by attachment, the second noble truth. And it does seem to me that longing intensifies and festers when there is an object of longing, like chocolate, like enlightenment. We know that when we long for something we don't have, we already are operating from a concept of ourself as incomplete, inadequate, in need of something difficult to acquire. And until we do acquire it, we will feel incomplete and inadequate. So there are two sufferings here, compound suffering, feeling inadequate without the object of my longing and feeling inadequate because I'm failing at acquiring the object of my longing. I think this is like the arrogance of inferiority that Norman brought up the other day, because the whole thing is only about me.

[24:06]

It's a tricky kind of arrogance. Here in Sashin, we have the opportunity to sit quietly with whatever shows up. We can allow longing as longing to show up. And we can simply sit and breathe together. Maybe weep a bit. Longing can be deeply and beautifully felt. It's the subject of art and religion throughout our human history. And it's the wellspring of inspiration and energy in our working together for the good. Longing is strong. So we must be strong to host longing as longing in our zazen. Let's sit zazen together for a few minutes.

[25:17]

First, we find our stable three-point sitting place. Our weight is balanced on three points. It can be knees and buttocks. It can be feet and buttocks. Then we can take three big breaths. Lift up our head as we inhale. And gently exhale, blowing out through our mouth like blowing bubbles. When we sit at home, we can make a sound. We can make some noise even. Not so much in the zendok. Just take three breaths so as not to hyperventilate or fall asleep.

[26:23]

Then settling in our place. Inhaling. Allow the breath to lift up our upper body from the inside out. Exhaling. Falling into earth. allowing our body to fall with the earth's gravity, falling into the earth's gravity. Now inhaling from the inside out, allowing lifting with air, feeling life's energy, life's atmosphere as we inhale. softly our life force lifting now exhale allowing tension in the back the neck the face to fall into the earth received by the earth's gravity

[27:42]

As thoughts and feelings come up, allow them in with the inhale. Allow their falling away on the exhale, received by the Earth's gravity. As sounds come to our attention, allow them in on the inhale. Allow them to fall away on the exhale. Each sensation coming to our attention, allowing in on the inhale, allowing falling away on the exhale. In this way, we can sit nourished by the Earth's atmosphere, held by the Earth's gravity, visited by the myriad things

[28:49]

Wherever we go, whatever we do, this is so. Thank you very much. May our intention equally extend to every being and play. with the true merit of Buddha's way. Beings are numberless, I vow to save them. Delusions are inexhaustible, I vow to end them. Dharma gates are boundless, I vow to enter them. Buddha's way is unsurpassable, I vow to become Many thanks.

[29:56]

We will return to the zendo, or stay, rather, in this zendo. After a 15-minute period of walking, zazen will begin at 11 a.m., and we will have two periods before noon service. Thank you.

[30:13]

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