This evening, I would like to talk about impermanence, creativity and generosity, and transformation in the midst of this global event, this moment in history that the whole world is going through. Our founder in Japan, in the 13th century, Ehihei Dogen, Dayousho, wrote this kind of beginner's guide to practice called Kakodo Yojinshu in Japanese. I think one translation is actually, the title in English is A Primer of Soto Zen. It's a sort of, well, I think that a more literal translation would be points to observe in practicing the way.

[01:01]

And so Dogen just lays out some points and then he expounds upon them and like, this is what you ought to do if you want to practice Zen, if you want to practice the Buddha way. So the very first thing Dogen says is, yeah, it's like divided into sections and each section has a, like a subject sentence. And This is the first. This is how the whole thing begins. The first admonition is, you should arouse the thought of enlightenment. He goes on to say, the thought of enlightenment has many names, but they all refer to one and the same mind. Ancestor Nagarjuna said, the mind that fully sees into the uncertain world of birth and death, is called the thought of enlightenment. Thus, if we maintain this mind, this mind can become the thought of enlightenment.

[02:08]

What does this mean? I've pondered this for a long time. Basically, Togen, or rather the ancient Indian, Mahayana Buddhist philosopher Nagarjuna is equating seeing impermanence with the mind that produces the thought of enlightenment. If we truly see impermanence, if we can truly unflinchingly see the uncertain world of birth and death, this in itself is The Mind of Enlightenment. To help, I have brought a visual aid. This is a painting that I've owned for many years. I'm really proud of it.

[03:13]

I love this painting. This is by East Bay artist Ezra V. Eismont. You see it says in permanence. Can you see that? Impermanence. And then flip it like this, and it says positivity. And it's got a whole lot. This is like a massive slab of plexiglass. Yeah, yes, for the artists. I should say the media is... Marking pen and acrylic paint on plexiglass. And there's a whole lot of things going on in here. Many things that are like relating to sudden change and chance. Like there's a atomic bomb, a tsunami, fire. We got a lot of that in California. You know, chance.

[04:15]

There's an ace of spades and a domino, a yin and a yang. And then all kinds of kind of random things like a cow. Chicken and, yeah, all kinds of stuff going on in here. In Zen, I think we would refer to that as the myriad things, the 10,000 things, all coming at you all at once. And then in the middle of it here, I don't think you can see it so well, but, you know, take my word for it. There's a little person here that seems to not have too much on their mind. And then it says G-I-V-E, give. There's like a little arrow. And then here's L. L-I-V-E. Give. Live. Mm-hmm. There's been a... Hey, y'all are looking. Give. Live. So... He painted on both sides because...

[05:20]

This is really groovy depth. There's been a lot of talk about essential services lately, and good. It's good. People getting the recognition that they should get, you know, not just service workers, but actually farm workers, grocery clerks. bus drivers, you know, that's what's keeping us alive right now in this unprecedented situation. I don't think many people would consider visual arts, literature, music to be essential services, but I can't imagine a world without them. The story of how I acquired this painting is a story of transformation, actually. It might be amusing.

[06:26]

It might be illustrative. Or it might not. But I'm going to share it with you anyway. Way back in the midst of time, back in the Jurassic era, when mountain bikes were like a brand new thing, just the whole idea of having a mountain bike, a bike that's just for off-road. I got myself a mountain bike. It was made by Peugeot. It was the heaviest bike you ever saw. It was just like it had so much steel. And I put so many miles on that bike. And, yeah, I had a long time. I rode it and rode it, and I destroyed it. Actually, the frame eventually broke. It was just mental fatigue. Nobody's fault. Pujol makes fine bicycles. But eventually, I seem to be kind of proud of this fact, I broke it. The frame just gave it up.

[07:29]

And so at this time, I was living in the East Bay where Ezra lives. Actually, we were neighbors. And I'm like, okay, now what do I do with this thing? The Buddha's last words. All component things in the world are changeable. They are not lasting. Allegedly. Some of his last words. So I took the bike apart and I had all the components. Like laid out on my concrete floor where I was living in one of these post-industrial spaces. Basically a loading dock is where I was living. And... There was this nice old guy in the neighborhood whose backyard was full of broke down bikes and bike parts. And he let me just poke around. And I bought a frame from him, I think, for like $5. And I took it home.

[08:30]

And I cleaned it up real good. And I spray painted it primer black. And I made another bike. And then I traded it for this painting. And Ezra was very happy with his new bike. And I was very happy to have this painting, which I still have to this day. So this is a story of creativity and transformation. For me, creativity and generosity are very closely aligned. usually in buddhist teaching we talk about the spirit of generosity is dana paramita the practice of the perfection of giving it's the first in the list of the six perfections the six paramitas some people might say it's first because it's the most important i don't know about that but i have also heard

[09:43]

It's the first on the list because you can't really practice the others without a generous heart. Live, give. To live is to give. In Buddhism, classically, when talking about generosity, it's broken down into three categories. There's three ways of practicing generosity. for Buddhist practitioners, for bodhisattvas in training like you. I kind of assume if you're tuning in tonight that you are all bodhisattvas in training. The first is to give material aid. This is very important, especially right now, so important. The second is to give the teaching, like a Dharma talk, for example. Or if somebody asks you, comes to you with a question, you don't withhold.

[10:49]

You don't hesitate. You freely share your experience. You freely share your understanding. And the third is to give the gift of non-fear. Our deceased abbess, Blanche Hartman, Blanche Roshi, Zenke Roshi, she used to talk about this a lot. She used to say, Well, I know about the first two, but how do I practice giving non-fear? How do I practice giving non-fear? This was like a koan for her. At this time, I think it's just so critical. To really help each other face this uncertain world of birth and death. Not knowing.

[11:54]

Everyone can speculate as much as they like, but we don't really know. And can that be okay? How do we offer each other this confidence? I believe we're on week five of this sheltering in place, lockdown. Call it what you like. It might as well be week 500 as far as I'm concerned. It's... No, I have no words. It's hard. And I know people, friends of mine, who literally have not been touched in five weeks or more.

[13:10]

That's really hard. That's a really hard thing for a human to go through. That's incredibly strong practice. We are not wired that way. I just want to... And under the circumstances, I've noticed, and I'm sure you all have too, there's been a lot of reaching out. I've been doing it a lot. I've been calling people a lot. I've been called a lot. A lot of connecting, a lot of connecting going on. I heard from a friend that I lost track of. I hadn't heard from in 17 years. Just the other day.

[14:19]

Kind of remarkable. and so necessary. So I think this is something, this is a gift that we can all give to each other. There's no one who has not been affected by this. My sister in Staten Island told me it was okay to share with you that she had COVID-19. She got real sick. She is better now. Apparently. Back to work. Working from home. Doing speech therapy through Zoom. Or some other platform, I don't know. But I was really scared. And her pastor...

[15:25]

father, Richard Guastella, the church she goes to, he died of it. I think it's been two weeks now since her pastor died. And a week before that, his brother died. So this is affecting people all over the world. And the amount of grief collectively we must process together is just, I can scarcely comprehend it. It's beyond my comprehension. And process it, we must. There is no other alternative. Cauterizing the pain

[16:28]

Shutting down is never a workable long-term solution. Another late habit, Myogun Steve Stuckey. One time, I was in Tokusang with Avid Steve. a private interview, one-on-one interview with the Abbott at Tassaharim. And I brought up the subject of grief. And Abbott Steve said, well, this is not an exact quote, but worse to the effect, that grief is a perfectly appropriate response. to the condition of being alive. Yeah, that's pretty close.

[17:32]

This is a time when really, as much as possible, we, all of us, this community, this Maha Sangha, we need to become very creative. We need to become creative. Find ways. under these remarkable, unique circumstances to find ways to support each other, to help each other process the grief. We need to get real creative about it. There's a lot of talk about, you know, getting back to normal. Reopening the economy. I hear a lot about that.

[19:00]

When are we going to reopen America? When are we going to get back to normal? Well, impermanence, positivity, to me, says there's no going back to normal. And that's as it should be. This crisis is bringing many things into sharp relief that were perhaps somewhat easier to turn away from or numb ourselves to. For example, racial inequities in healthcare.

[20:06]

The fact that people of color are dying of COVID-19 at a much higher rate. There's nothing wrong with people of color. There's everything wrong with structural racism. We can't hide from that. We can't ignore it. There's no going back to normal. What kind of normal do you want to go back to? You know, last month, the month of March 2020, was the first month of March since 2002, that there was not a single school shooting. Is that the normal we want to go back to?

[21:09]

In this country, three men, three individuals, own more wealth than half the rest of the country put together. Is that the normal we want to go back to? The Reverend Dr. William Barber said, I believe that everything now can shift. this moment of possible mortality for all of us calls us to a new place. The thought of enlightenment has many names, but they all refer to one and the same mind.

[22:24]

Another name that many of you might be familiar with is way-seeking mind. All of us have way-seeking mind. All of us are endowed with the mind that seeks the way to use this gift that we've been given, to use our creativity, touch into our common humanity and find our way. Again, I will say, we must. What other option is there? The poet

[23:33]

and spoken word artist, Sonia Renee Taylor. She said, we will not go back to normal. Normal never was. Our pre-corona existence was not normal other than we normalized greed, inequity, exhaustion, depletion, extraction, disconnection, confusion, rage, hoarding. hate, and lack. We should not long to return, my friends. We are being given the opportunity to stitch a new garment, one that fits all of humanity and nature. All of humanity and nature. Happy Earth Day, everybody.

[24:34]

Happy Earth Day. Yeah. What a beautiful day it was in San Francisco. Hmm. The sky is so clear. So amazing. The other day, Linda and I had a double dokasan with Sojan Roshi. on Zoom, of course. And it was totally delightful, of course. Like the main thing Sojourner Roshi wanted to talk about was how quiet everything is, how the skies are so clear, how beautiful it is right now. Everything slowed down. He just kept emphasizing how wonderful this is. which I don't think that Sojourner Roshi is blind to the fact that people are dying unnecessarily, that there's tremendous loss and grief all around the world.

[25:46]

He's not blind to that fact. But he's famous for holding up the other side. Yeah. Many people are remarking on this. This photograph of Los Angeles with absolutely clear sky. Unprecedented areas in India where you can see the Himalayas. You hadn't been able to see them for decades. Earth Day 2020. For years, people have been saying, my friends, anyway, everyone I know, climate action. We have to do something about the climate. We have to do something. When are we going to take action? Hey, hey. What do you know? It's happening. It's happening.

[26:49]

This country, we have nowhere left to store oil. They're putting oil in like railroad cars. Every tank is full. Pots and pans. There's nowhere left to put the oil. Leave it in the ground. Just saying. Thought we couldn't do this? This is what's happening. I guess we can do this. Let's not forget. Don't be in too big hurry to get back to normal. Wildlife. Today, this evening, Linda and I were having dinner together, sitting right over there by the window.

[27:57]

I look up, and I'm like, what the? There's a golden eagle. winging over San Francisco, in the sky over San Francisco. I've seen enough gold needles in Tassajara. I knew what I was looking at. I've never seen one in San Francisco before. That was a first for me. Wow. Wow. So before I leave you this evening, I would like to do one more little bit of show and tell. I want to share with you a gift that was given to Linda Gallion by Kerry Hertel, a tribal leader of the Esalen tribe where Tassajara is.

[29:05]

It was woven and crafted by indigenous people in Peru. And inside, when Carrie gave this to us, she said, it's prayers. And the gift was because Linda was a catalyst, instrumental in San Francisco Zen Center becoming a fiscal sponsors for the Esalen Tribe. so they could incorporate as a 501 . So they're very grateful Carrie presented this. She gave it to me to give to Linda. Inside the bag. This is an abalone shell. And it has sage. And around the inside. Braided sweetgrass.

[30:09]

And Carrie said. The sage is for purification. The sweetgrass. The braided sweetgrass. Is for reconciliation. And the abalone. Is for protection. She said. The esalen. You know, coastal, along the Pacific coast, they wear jewelry of abalone for protection. So this evening, I would like to invoke the abalone. Protection. It's clear to me that this... extraordinarily difficult practice, and yes, it is a practice that we're all doing together, is working.

[31:13]

It's effective. All this physical distancing, wearing the masks, sheltering in place, so hard, but it's working. You see signs in people's windows. And my favorite one that I've seen, probably like an eight or nine-year-old kid with their poster paints, made this big sign and put it in the window of the house. And it says, we are saving lives. Your parents must be so proud of them. And I agree. Preserving life.

[32:27]

This is where we're at. Okay. As Soda Roshi would say, it has to be okay. Okay. that went a little bit more quickly than I thought. I don't know if I was talking fast or what. Kodo, I think we have time for questions. How about that? Sounds great to me. Thanks so much, Greg. If you would like to pose a question, you can raise your hand by opening the participant window. Then you should see a button to raise your hand. I'll give a little cue and then I can unmute you and you can

[33:35]

You can put your thought or your comment or your question into the room. Even in this gallery view, I see names of people that I haven't seen in so long. I wish you all had your cameras on, but that's all right. So wonderful. Yeah, I feel the connection. I feel it. May put her hand up.

[34:37]

I thought your talk was really beautifully crafted and I so appreciated this inspiring vision of what might be possible and that it may not really be necessary to hunger to return to what was before and I appreciate that. Something I'm curious about, just to hear you riff on this a little bit more, is you started the talk using the word enlightenment. I'd be curious just to hear you talk a little bit more about your understanding of enlightenment. That's another name for it, right?

[35:50]

Awakening. It means having your eyes open. Not turning away. As a Soto Zen person, I feel... It's more process than event. Sometimes I'm better equipped or better circumstances, causes and conditions, as we say. I can face what's coming.

[36:51]

I can face what's arising. My ongoing practice intention is to just keep doing that to the best of my ability. You know, the word Buddha, literally means woke. It just means having your eyes open and not turning away. This is, I would say, frequently, frequently, and maybe especially under current circumstances, really challenging. Suzuki Roshi famously said, Don't be in too big a hurry to be enlightened. You may not like it. Okay.

[38:03]

I think the thing is, as Suzuki Roshi also said, to just keep making our best effort on each moment forever. Notice, you know. To do my best to notice when I'm turning away. To do my best to notice when I'm numbing out. When I'm like, oh, this is too much. You know. 10,000 things. Too much. Whatever comes forward. is Buddhadharma. Those are pretty words. But how do you live it, you know? That's my official riff.

[39:03]

I think we have a question from the chat. Ah. Johan and Fatima have asked, can or should SFZC play a creative or political role in addressing the inequities in society that you mentioned? I don't see why not. I think each of us can. I think, I hope, perhaps, in my own small way, I may have done some of that just now. And Sure. San Francisco Zen Center can also, you know, as an institution. Why not? Why not? I'm a big fan of Dr. Barber and the repairs of the breach. You know, he does not hesitate.

[40:08]

He speaks his mind. There's work to be done. Important work, Buddha work. Yeah, so in short, yes. Thank you. Greg, time for one more perhaps. Okay. Oh yeah. I saw Tim and Dawu. Hi, Tim and Dawu. Hey, thank you for your talk. It's really wonderful to see you, Greg. And I was interested If you could speak more about what it is to give fearlessness. Yeah. You know, maybe another good word in English is confidence with faith.

[41:17]

standard Soto liturgy ordination ceremony, we begin with faith that we are Buddha, in faith that we are Buddha, in faith that we are Buddha, we enter Buddha's way. It's not blind faith, as far as I'm concerned. It's faith based on your experience. Confidence is learned and cultivated through the process of this sharing that I was talking about, this mutual support. Yes, and I believe that it can be cultivated. Thanks for your question. Thank you.

[42:18]

Well, that's it. Thank you, everybody. It's been a real joy. Yay, my first Zoom talk. Okay, so we're going to do the Bodhisattva vows. Is that right, Kodo? It is so right. I've included them in the chat window if you'd like to chant along. Yay. Thanks so much, Greg. May our intention equally extend to every being and place with the true merit of Buddha's way. Things are numberless. I vow to save them. Delusions are inexhaustible. I vow to end them. Dharma gates are boundless. I vow to enter them.

[43:23]

Buddha's way is unsurpassable. I vow to become ill. Goodnight, everybody. Thanks so much, everyone.

[43:39]

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