This podcast is offered by the San Francisco Zen Center on the web at www.sfcc.org. Our public programs are made possible by donations from people like you. Good morning. Thank you for coming on this marvelous spring sunny day. Get a sense of people that are here. Are there any people that are here for the first time? Welcome. Thank you for coming today. Are there people that have been so many times that they don't remember the first time they came and they don't have any idea how many talks they've attended here? Thank you for coming again. and again and again.

[01:00]

And for all of those who want to put up your hand because you didn't get a chance for the first time or the second time to want to just put up your hand. So thank you. My name is Mary. I'm a resident of City Center. I've lived here... since 2013 and before then I was at Tassajara and before then I lived for a time at Green Gulch so I've been at all three temples residentially and currently I'm the head of practice or the Tonto here I haven't been doing it so long I'm just sliding into the role and trying to manifest something that I'm not quite sure the shape of it which is kind of humbling but I'm positive that there's something here for me to do and I think for now that's motivation enough I wanted to talk about a place that I've visited a few times

[02:29]

in the prairies of Alberta, Canada. I think in the United States you call this kind of landscape the plains. This place is called Head Smashed in Buffalo Jump. Now it's an extraordinary cultural center that as a result of many archaeological digs has developed a story that's centuries old and that people can go now and feel. And I use that word feel because you don't go there and read and see what's happening with your brain. You go there and you feel you feel the place. The place holds memory. It holds knowledge.

[03:32]

It holds history. It holds culture. It's a remarkable place. And the purpose of this place is centuries old, maybe even millennia. They're finding layers and layers and layers of bones. And in the prairie... The joke is in Canada on the prairie that you can watch your dog run away for a day. So you can imagine this expanse that goes out. The horizon is flat. The sky is huge. It's massive. It's almost like looking out on the ocean. And in this particular place, there's a land formation that is kind of like an eyebrow.

[04:35]

So it sweeps up and down and it's very narrow. And it's a cliff. It's not a high cliff. But it's a cliff that probably is about 30 feet high or something. And probably not much wider than the Buddha Hall. So it's this arch that comes out of the land. And centuries or millennia ago, the First Nations people realized that this could be of critical importance to them. And so over the memory of peoples, they added stones as a lane and they would build fires and they would have people running and at the particular time when the bison were migrating across the plain the prairie if the conditions were right if the wind was right if the way the bison were moving was right if the

[06:00]

the people that ran was right, if the fires that were set were right, then the peoples could herd a number of these bison to a path where they were stampeding, afraid, terrified stampeding, and they would hurl themselves over the cliff, and they were heavy enough that they would break their necks and die and then all of the gathered peoples would spend the next days or months depending on how many bison did this and they would busy themselves by collecting absolutely everything of this precious offering they collected the skin they collected the flesh they collected the marrow and they collected the bones And in fact, the digs that they've done indicate that almost nothing was wasted.

[07:05]

And this happened not yearly, probably not every decade, sometimes not every hundred years. And the people kept this memory. And this would feed them for sometimes months through the winter. and if it was a particularly good haul it could feed them for years because they had a system of drying meat pounding it mixing it with berries and it would be sustenance for a very long time so this particular set of circumstances was precious knowledge and they kept this alive and then starting in the 1800s when the West was opened in Canada and in the plains in this country and the trains particularly started moving the bison were slaughtered the food source died

[08:26]

and this place became not only a impossibility for the peoples but they started losing the memory of what it was so I'm telling you this story because I think that at this time in our world we are the buffalo the bison that are being driven over the cliff I think that in our society we are the terrified animals that are moving far too quickly into something we don't know. And if we don't start attending to this the result is

[09:29]

inevitable. And people say this, scientists say this. I think many of us, particularly younger people, are starting to feel it in their bones. I remember hearing an estimate about the depletion of the oceans and the fish that I found particularly alarming a couple years ago so there we are running running with eyes wide with terror moving with the pack and I propose that the only thing that can be done at this point is that we individually cut ourselves out of the herd And we start making an effort, however that effort is, to change what we are doing individually and that change will then influence what we do as a society and as a planet.

[10:44]

And this is an impossible task. And the belief that I hold and the reason why I am sitting in this seat today and why I am the head of practice in this temple is because I have the belief that the teachings of the Buddha are the way that I have chosen to cut myself out of the herd. It doesn't mean that I'm not still running with everybody else who's running in this direction. But it feels like I have some tools to manage this. And the tools that I'm managing with are supported by my life with this community or sangha.

[11:54]

There's a sentence from the Tenzo Kyokun, which is a document. The Tenzo Kyokun means instructions to the cook. It's the individual that runs the kitchen at Zen Center. So the Tenzo Kyokun was written by the founder of this school of Zen or Zen Buddhism. And he wrote this in about 1223. And the sentence is, although the work of the Tenzo is just that of preparing meals. It is in spirit different from the work of an ordinary cook or kitchen helper. So what I am choosing to do by cutting myself out from the herd doesn't look so different. But in spirit with my intention with my activity, I am working to make a change in me.

[13:06]

So my immediate habitual patterns will not continue to drive me over a cliff. And in a sangha, one of the ways that we do or use, one of the things we rely on for ourselves and for the group is the Eightfold Path of the Noble Ones. These are reminders. They're pointing, it's like pointing yourself towards the North Star. They are not so easy and yet to say them to believe in them, to practice them over and over, lays a foundation of change that moves us in a certain direction. So the elements of the Eightfold Path are right view, right resolve, right conduct, right speech, right livelihood,

[14:28]

right mindfulness, and right samadhi, which is meditative absorption. And through the support of others in the sangha, through the support of the teachings, I feel that it's possible to discern what each of these elements of the Eightfold Path are. And when you think about view, when you first hear the word right view, it's possible that things come into mind for you. It's possible when you're quiet enough to have this bubble up inside you.

[15:32]

And I also believe that if we're so busy, if we're working 80 hours a week, if we have no time, then this bubbling up is almost impossible. Living in community is not necessarily quieter than living outside of community. There are many people that have the idea that if they come here, it'll be a contemplative life and it'll allow for a lot of self-reflection and quiet. And there are some religious... that allow for that. I would not say that Zen is one of those.

[16:39]

I would say that what happens in these walls is more that through the conversation, through the work, through the bumping up, through the tension, through the coming together and going apart, through the love and through the difficulty we are reminded of right view. And we are reminded over and over and over again. We are faced with our worst self and then somehow we are faced with our best self. And we start moving into the direction of our best self because we are reminded what that feels like. We are reminded about who that person who's holding that looks like. We are reminded about who we want to be in this world where we all seem to be running towards this thing that we don't want to be jumping over together.

[17:55]

So all of these elements right view right resolve right conduct right speech right livelihood right mindfulness and right samadhi they need to be able to bubble up to the surface over and over and over again because as humans we don't easily stay on a corrective path. I think our training in this culture, and maybe in most cultures in this world, is that we can be self-reliant. We can actually know what's right for ourselves.

[19:03]

We can actually make decisions that are always good, that we can do anything we want. These things are interesting things to examine to see if it's true. And one of the places that examination can happen is when we do this practice called Zazen, or Seated Meditation. So one of the few times in this temple where it's relatively quiet is when we're downstairs in this endo sitting zazen. And one comes to realize that even though we are all down there in that room sitting facing a wall it's not so quiet.

[20:05]

Because our minds aren't quiet. Our minds are a riot of activity. So this training can take a lifetime. And this lifetime is not easy for us. Because what we really want is to go to a workshop that lasts for four hours and have something change. And then the next weekend we want to go to another workshop and have something change there. So it's not... it's not... not part of it's not an easy part of us to settle into something that takes a long time there are all these stories you know about child prodigies and how they're so fabulous there are three and they can play the piano and they don't really have to practice and then they go and travel and they do these marvelous things and aren't they amazing and shouldn't we all be like that

[21:35]

And we're just not all like that. And would we want to be, really? So Zen is a school not for prodigies. It's a school for those of us that are pointing in a certain direction and need help. help from those around us, help from ancestors, help from family. So we move in that direction. And it's hard to have faith in this. it's hard to have faith with the messages that are coming at us all the time it's hard to have faith with the over and over story of massacres that are happening with I mean I could just go on and on with a list and then we'd all just be weeping and you'd never want to come to another one of these talks so it's

[23:08]

I feel a certain, I realize over the last number of months anyway, that I feel now a certain urgency in myself and in my beliefs, I guess. it's possible that it isn't going to be okay. And then what, you know? And I believe that that negativity, that holding on to part of reality, because I believe it's true, cannot be the most the loudest voice in myself the loudest voice in myself has to come back to this idea of right view right resolve right speech right conduct right livelihood

[24:36]

right mindfulness and right samadhi. And to remind myself and the people I live with and love that this is actually a worthwhile direction. And to invite other people to join in walking in this direction. And I believe that this is one of the things that San Francisco Zen Center is intending to do, is to invite people to join us, to join me in walking in this direction. The people that came today, thank you for coming because you're walking in this direction. Thank you. the people that have come so many times, they have no idea how many times they've been here.

[25:45]

Thank you for coming today to walk in this direction. The effort at all of the temples of San Francisco Zen Center I believe is this effort the temples all look very different Green Gulch is a mainly based on the idea that is an organic farm and garden it's in a beautiful place it's a little bit isolated not so isolated Tassajara is in the wilderness of the Ventana I guess it's called the Ventana Wilderness actually. And it's in the summertime dry and hot and isolated.

[26:50]

And it's a guest spot in the summer. And in the wintertime it's closed to visitors and it's a monastery where people practice more intensively. and they're they're there now walking in this direction and then city center which is the most open of the temples the most porous of the temples we have a lot of things happening here people coming and going, non-residential people, people taking various classes, people can come on a daily basis and sit with us. And those people are all walking in this direction.

[27:52]

And then the other thing that happens in all three places... is an intensified practice called Tsashin where we all slow down and we walk in this direction and we get a chance for these things to bubble up to bubble up intensely and we get a chance to turn off the rest of our lives and feel the breath in your body feel how many thoughts you have feel what your body feels like feel like what it feels like

[29:05]

to sit beside somebody that you've never talked to and probably never will for seven days and to wake up every morning for those seven days and do it over and over and over again. It's a very vigorous practice and it feels like it's isolating when you haven't done it, I would say. It is intimacy unlike anything I've ever done before. You begin to understand how somebody moves and breathes and how you can hear how they are how you can feel that from them without having to be told that that's what's going on it's very interesting it's pretty radical it allows all of us to experience our bodies in a way that's unusual in our culture

[30:36]

when I first started sitting I knew it would be a good thing for me but I also didn't understand what an effect it would have in my life when I first started sitting I thought that I would just keep on doing the things that I've been doing in my life. And then at a certain point I realized that I no longer believed in those things. And I started putting my effort into the pursuit

[31:39]

of right view right resolve right speech right conduct right livelihood right mindfulness and right samadhi And I'm repeating those things. And I'm aware that I'm repeating those things. Because repetition is, I'm finding, the only thing that penetrates into this heart. So the study of these things over and over and over again allows for different choices.

[32:55]

Allows for different... Maybe first it allows for different possibilities. And then it allows for different choices. and then maybe different actions. And nothing happens tomorrow. And how painful is that? So if you ever get a chance to go to this place called head smashed in Buffalo Jump please do rent a car fly into Lethbridge, Alberta and drive over the prairie to this remarkable place and have a conversation with the remarkable people that

[34:12]

are working there because their ancestors made the place. And it's not a sad story. I believe that those people revered the bison and for everything they took they gave and that seems to be a rapidly changing practice I think we've become very good at taking think it's possible that we can cut ourselves out of the herd.

[35:50]

I think it's possible. I think it's possible that changes can be made. That we can start heading in a different direction. That the terror that drives us as a that drives us as I'm thinking people in this direction I think that can be corrected I think we can move in the right direction and I believe that we need each other to do that and if you're interested in doing it in a way that we can help with which is coming to live here please consider it.

[36:53]

Please consider practicing with us and helping us and helping yourself. Please consider the ways that you can support us and the ways that you can support yourself. Please consider coming more often, sitting more often. Please consider coming to the Zenathon in April in Green Gulch. Please consider involving yourself in practice. And if this practice and you like one another, please practice. So thank you very much for your participation today.

[37:57]

The good news is there's sugar afterwards in the form of cookies and tea. So thank you very much and I hope you have a wonderful walk in the sun today and for those of you who are sitting this sashim walk in the path of your ancestors. Thank you for listening to this podcast offered by the San Francisco Zen Center. Our Dharma talks are offered at no cost and this is made possible by the donations we receive. Your financial support helps us to continue to offer the Dharma. For more information visit sfcc.org and click giving. May we fully enjoy the Dorma.

[38:59]

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