Thank you. An unsurpassed, penetrating and perfect dharma, is rarely met with even in a hundred thousand million culpas.

[01:11]

To see and listen to, to remember and accept, I vow to taste the truth, to target those words. Amen. Gone in an instant, vanished in a flash. Weren't we just here with a big ceremony?

[02:20]

And it's all gone. Were we present for it? So that's really something I appreciate, learned to appreciate about Zen Center, that the effort that go into ceremonies and the setup and the rehearsal and then the happening of them and then An hour later, there's no trace. And for a long time, I felt, oh, it looked so beautiful. Can't we just leave it a little longer? Can't we just see it a little longer? And then I started to really appreciate because that's how every moment is. It comes into full fruition, and then the next moment comes. So we are on day four of the Sesshin.

[03:24]

And we could say... The first three days we were taking refuge in Buddha, immersing body and mind deeply in the way. And now we have started day four and we are entering or have entered deeply the merciful ocean of Buddha's way. taking refuge in Dharma. So this morning we had a long ceremony and then breakfast in the Zendo and then a very short break, then back to the Zendo. And having entered deeply the merciful ocean of Buddha's way, we might. We didn't get engaged with what? bell already now?

[04:25]

Why don't we have a longer break? And maybe we did, but we went to the sendo anyway. So the merciful ocean of Buddha's way is completely inclusive. It includes everything that is. whether known or unknown, whether small or great, whether visible or invisible, near or far, born or to be born. It includes, encompasses, holds all the suffering in this world, in the six realms, all of it. And we shouldn't need to say that, but as humans we need to say it, it also includes the whole unconditioned being that is in each one of us.

[05:42]

We're not an exception to this. Having entered the merciful ocean of Buddha's way, or being about to enter it. You know, everybody has their own timing. We have or are about to enter new unknown territory. It's territory that is beyond words and concepts. But Our body knows about that territory because our body actually functions completely beyond words and concepts. Our body in its liberated form is completely like the merciful ocean of Buddha's way.

[06:48]

It can hold all the contradictions that our mind can see in things all the variety, the infinite variety with no problem because it is completely interconnected, completely related to every, every, every single thing in this universe. So, We also have a body that has been conditioned by experiences and then keeps being conditioned by the stories we tell ourselves about those experiences and that we hold on to. But now, on day four, those stories hopefully have kind of, by sitting still, have kind of loosened their...

[07:54]

hold on us. And we are more capable to just be with what is arising. So the Sashin structure gives us the support to just be fully with ourselves. With all the aspects of our beings that present themselves to us. And as humans, we have the same ability that Vimalakirti had. So, Buddha is telling his disciples, as well as transcendent bodhisattvas and deities, to go see Vimalakirti. but they are reluctant to go and make excuses because in the past they all had been intimidated by Vimalakirti's superior understanding.

[09:04]

Even Manjushri, the bodhisattva of wisdom, feels humbled by Vimalakirti, but he agrees to go visit the layman. So the Vimalakirti Sutra also kind of tells the story that any human being They don't have to be monks, nuns, ordained, can be a bodhisattva and can be completely awake. So then a great host of disciples, Buddhas, Bodhisattvas, gods and goddesses decide to go along to witness because a conversation between Vimalakirti and Manjushri would be incalculably difficult So then they all come to Vimalakirti's small room in which he lies in bed ill. And his room expands and expands and keeps expanding to make space for all the countless beings

[10:21]

who have come to see him. And that's a capacity our body can do, we as humans can do. We can make space for whatever is arising in us. We can treat it with equal respect. We can say, oh, you're here too, you get a place too. and you're here. Oh, I didn't know you existed. Oh, welcome, you get a place too. Oh, you're here, and I used to not like you, but please be welcome and be here too. Oh, you I know very well. Welcome, you get a place too. Everything gets equal respect, equal space, and there is no end. to creating space for them.

[11:22]

So, on day four, this is what might happen to many of us, that things just start presenting themselves, feelings, thoughts, memories from the past, and can we just make space for them? Not holding on to them, not doing anything with them, just letting them be as they are, but say, oh, you're here too, and we make space. And if that new and unknown territory starts agitating you, then see if you can shift your attention into your body and take four slow, deep breaths. And then see if that calms your body, calms your mind.

[12:39]

And check in through all the parts of your body to see are there places where your body feels at ease. where it is not affected by agitation or nervous energy. And if you find places, make them your home base, your resting place where you just hang out with your awareness. If none of that works and you're getting frightened or you're getting... and you feel your body stiffened, please come and talk to one of us. The practice leaders that are here during the seshin are here to support you. So don't force yourself to stay still with something that overwhelms you, that makes you frightened and tight and stiff.

[13:49]

Tell the Enoch, and one of us will meet with you. Don't have to wait till you're called for doksan or practice discussion because you signed up two or three days before. Just avail yourself of that support, please. That helps everybody in the room. And it's not necessary. The less we fight, the less we force ourselves... the more there is space for life to just unfold as it should and can. So because being is beyond words, life and unfolding of life is beyond words and concepts, I have been trying to use few words.

[15:09]

And I have not added encouraging words into Zazen periods. And the question is arising, is that helpful for you to be in so much quiet space or is that too much? So if you have an opinion about that, if for you words once during the day would help you in Zazen, would you write a note, please? And let me know. If not, my tendency is to just keep the quiet. I'm so moved by it each time I come to the Zendo. In the morning, in the evening, in the day.

[16:12]

To me, it feels incredibly supportive and holding all of you. But that might not be your experience, so please let me know. and sign with your name. That's helpful. Shoaku Okamura says, When we study the self, We cannot see ourselves as objects. We have to live out ourselves. We have to practice with this body and mind. The reality of our life is a very obvious, ordinary thing.

[17:16]

It is no separation of I, the self, the Buddha way, study, or practice. The reality of our life is no separation of I, the self, the Buddha way, study, practice. Subject, action, and object are completely the same thing. But as soon as we start to think or speak using words or concepts, we have to create separation. There's no other way around it. So during the seshin, we have a structure that allows us to sit beyond words. In every day... Life, we need words. So if we need a glass of water, we maybe have to say I'm thirsty and somebody brings us a glass of water if we're sick.

[18:25]

So it's not, they're useless. But they create separation between me, I, and other. I and things. But the reality of our life is no separation between any of those. And that's the opportunity we have while sitting Zazen in the Zendo, while somebody is preparing food for us, while somebody is making sure we're safe, while somebody, the Eno, is watching over you. So if you need something in the middle of a Zazen period, don't force yourself. Get help, get support quietly. That's the job of the Eno. And she does a fabulous job. So there's no forcing. There's no... It's just allowing.

[19:31]

And your body will let you know and your heart will let you know what you need. And it will let you know if you need it right now, if it's really... important now or if it can wait. If it can wait, you get the help during kinyin. If it can't wait, then please take care of yourself, which means you take care of everybody at the same time because there's no separation even between all of us. So there's a poem that kind of speaks about this in its own way. A blade of grass. You ask for a poem. I offer you a blade of grass. You say, it is not good enough.

[20:33]

You ask for a poem. I say, this blade of grass will do. It has dressed itself in frost. It is more immediate than any image of my making. You say, it is not a poem. It is a blade of grass, and grass is not quite good enough. I offer you a blade of grass. You are indignant. You say, it is too easy to offer grass. It is absurd. Anyone can offer a blade of grass. You ask for a poem. And so I write you a tragedy about how a blade of grass becomes more and more difficult to offer. And about how, as you grow older, a blade of grass becomes more difficult to accept.

[21:39]

we are in the process of reversing this by sitting still. We become available to the blade of grass that's offered, to the feeling that our life offers up for us in the city, to the memory that our life offers us in the city. And if we can, when these things come up, feel that our body is actually connected to all the bodies and they're all holding us while we're having this memory, while we're having this feeling, while these thoughts are coming up or these stories, that the whole room and everybody's intention and presence is holding us expanding our bodies and its capacity to just be with, without doing anything about it.

[22:50]

Nothing needs fixing. Nothing needs changing. The moment we allow it to just be as it presents itself, it is changing because nothing is fixed. It starts changing and moving in front of us. So Okamura says somewhere else, what we do in our zazen is opening the hand of thought. We let go of whatever thoughts, feelings or emotions come up from ourselves in zazen. Letting go is complete negation of everything coming up from egocentric karmic self.

[23:51]

We let go not only of selfish ideas, but also our understanding of the Dharma. Just sitting, shikantasa, is the complete negation of all these constructs. We let go not only of selfish ideas, No, sorry. And at the same time, so just sitting, Shikantaza, is the complete negation of all of this. And at the same time, in letting go, everything is accepted. Nothing is negated. Everything is just as it is. So what gets negated or annihilated is... our ideas about it, that make it an object. And by letting go of that, by opening the grasping of that, by letting go of that grip on it, nothing is negated.

[25:02]

Everything is just as it is. So somebody once said, by letting go, we give things back to themselves. We free them from our manipulation of them by trapping them in stories, by trapping them in contact. We give them their freedom back to just be themselves. Everything is just as it is. Letting go of thought is not killing the thought. Thoughts are coming up moment by moment, but we just let go. Thoughts are there, feelings are there, emotions are there, sensations are there. But in Zazen, we do not think, we do not give them names necessarily. We do not hold stories, entertain stories about them. We just sit.

[26:04]

Within just sitting, everything is just as it is. We have and are entering and are swimming around in the merciful ocean of Buddha's way that includes everything, that doesn't exclude anything, that has space for whatever it is that presents itself. And that's also an expression of our Buddha hearts, our Buddha nature.

[27:11]

ask for a poem, I offer you a blade of grass. You say it is not good enough. You ask for a poem. I say this blade of grass will do. It has dressed itself in frost. It is more immediate than any image of my making. You say it is not a poem. It is a blade of grass, and grass is not quite good enough. I offer you a blade of grass. You are indignant. You say it is too easy to offer grass. It is absurd. Anyone can offer a blade of grass. You ask for a poem. And so I write you a tragedy. about how a blade of grass becomes more and more difficult to offer, and about how, as you grow older, a blade of grass becomes more difficult to accept.

[28:27]

So on day four, we are offered many, many blades of grass, many, many opportunities for immediate receiving and immediacy of things coming up. Take good care of yourself. It's unknown territory for a lot of us because it keeps being unknown territory. Whether we are new to practice or feel like we're old to Life keeps expanding and new territories keep opening up. So please take very good care of yourself. There's nothing that needs to be fixed and help is available if needed. Please avail yourself of it. And thank you very much for

[29:38]

creating the merciful ocean of Buddha's way together. May our intention equally extend to every being and place with the true merit of Buddha's way. Jujo muhen secando.

[30:12]

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