Good evening. Before I get into the substance of tonight's talk, I want to make a shameless plug for Shashin. In particular, for those of you who are in the practice period, By all means, if you can, sign up for the whole sasheen. If you can't sign up for the whole sasheen, feel invited to sign up for part of it. It can be either in terms of days, or it can also be part of each day. Sometimes a very interesting practice to bracket your workday with formal sitting at the start and the finish. And of course, sometimes that's taxing in terms of your energy. And you can also come for parts of the day too.

[01:08]

It's a very interesting process to sit together. And it's an interesting process if you can come and join and engage the experience. sometimes quite literally, you can come and you can feel the energy, you can feel the engagement, you can feel the concentration, and you can join into it. Quite specifically, it depends upon can you get your own busyness and chatter and preoccupation out of the way. If your internal process is going full blast, It's harder to hear the subtler sounds of Shashina. But please feel invited to join in, and if you have any questions about the logistics of that, call us up and we'll discuss them.

[02:14]

Talk to myself or Jordan or the front office or the Ina. Okay. That's... public announcement over now. The Shusou was telling me how much she liked having descriptive breathing exercises. So somehow, in the logic of my mind, I have assumed if the Shusou liked it, everybody else must like it too. In my own thinking, having practiced in Asia for several years and then come to the West, preceding practicing in the West, I have often thought about, are we preserving the subtler heritage and skillfulness of what has been cultivated in 2,500 years in terms of Buddhist practice in Asia?

[03:32]

I have heard, and I've been told this, I didn't witness it or experience it directly, that some of the Burmese meditation masters, when they first encountered Westerners coming there to practice, they were perplexed by their responses. They'd say, okay, do this technique and then come back tomorrow and tell me exactly how it's going. And then the person would come back tomorrow and they would be... Anxious, depressed, upset, angry, all sorts of things, you know. And the meditation masters would be thinking, but I told you to do this with your breath. What happened? And something about... Engaging precisely and as fully as possible is provocative.

[04:45]

It's a catalyst in terms of the process of our being. And I'll get back to that later, but now I would like to offer you another slight elaboration in terms of breathing exercises. So if you could, sit up. And as you sit up, not just to take your posture, but remember, the wisdom of posture is that it enlivens the body. The body becomes alive. It becomes more accessible to awareness. So as you engage your posture, as you engage the body, you know, a receptivity, an openness too,

[05:47]

and inclining to the experiences of physical being. And don't worry about whether or not the mind is deeply still or whatever else it may be. Don't worry about it. Don't try to stop it. But offer attention to the body. And as best you can, bring attention down into the area between the navel and the groin. And if it feels helpful, you can breathe in, hold the breath, and press down with the diaphragm, just helping to loosen and engage that lower region. And then also if it feels helpful, in the exhale, like a sigh, just releasing the busyness.

[07:04]

Whether it's excitement and pleasureful, whether it's agitation and painful, whether it's just neutral, whether it's just the byproduct of thinking all day and interacting all day and going from here to there, It's giving the breath, the authority, the permission to release as you breathe out. It's about getting underneath the agendas, the content, the intrigues of thinking and feeling. Of course they're important in your life, but they're not the whole story.

[08:08]

Tuning in to some other sensibility about being. And as you tune in with the exhale, Noticing the quality of mind, the state of mind. Feeling it. And letting the exhale wash it through. A soft release, not a coercive release. A permission. And then as best you can, extending the exhale quite deliberately.

[09:13]

The inhale is relaxed and normal, the exhale is extended. And with each exhale, trying to, in the pause before the exhale, bring back that careful attending okay this exhale is going to be accompanied by thorough full attention and then it's deliberately extended and lengthened not so that you're gasping for inhale but it's longer than usual And you can even experiment with, you extend, you pause for a moment, and then you extend for just a little bit more. And if this stirs anything up, positive or negative, just let that wash through too, like the sound of that passing car.

[10:30]

And even if the mind wanders, pause, restore the full attention, the deliberate involvement with the exhale. Thank you. So, now, for a little of Zen master Dogen. Dogen Zenji wrote a fascicle that he called Dragon's Roar, Ryujin, based on a Zen saying. The wind howls like a dragon's roar.

[12:23]

And this is fundamentally a teaching on zazen, on breathing in zazen. You might wonder, well, why didn't they just sort of say that? I've asked myself that question. my answer to myself is that it has something to do with not wanting to divert from experience. So the language is coded in a way that speaks of what it's like to do it, like to be in the experience rather than give you a formulation where you can go, oh, I understand it. It's not about understanding.

[13:25]

It's not about having another piece of interesting information about Zen practice. It's more about giving pointers, alluding to the nature of experience when the breath is flowing through the body, and the qi, the energy of engagement is allowed, is not being hindered. And that something comes forth, the very life force of our being expresses itself, like a dragon's roar. Remembering, you know, that the marvelous thing about a dragon is that it can swim in the ocean, it can walk on the earth, and it can fly in the sky. So all the elements, that the context of life don't hinder the flow of our life.

[14:29]

And the context of our life is not dependent upon how the particular circumstances of our life are at any moment. You're not more alive or less alive, dependent upon whether it's raining or the sun shining. You might like it more or less, but you're still fully alive either way. Something about, can we tap into that? And we can tap into it as an understanding, as a perspective, and often that can be helpful. But we can also tap into it as an experience, as we release with the exhale. Something about dropping underneath the constructs, the intrigues, the memories, the imaginings.

[15:36]

dropping underneath the residual psychological importance of our day, of our states of mind that we've had recently. Something more elemental. And this dropping underneath, classically in Zen, is called the withered tree. The image is... that the attachments that we form, the things that we're clinging to, the ways we're being caught up in something, are like leaves on the tree. And they just drop off. The way leaves drop off in autumn. So just let it fall away. Body and mind dropped off. So the notion in this city And the suddenly of our sitting is, when we're sitting, it may be naturally enough, after a busy day, the mind doesn't go into a state of still serenity and clear concentration.

[17:00]

But in a way, the not get hung up on that either. The mind is just being mind and accompanied by whatever feelings or imaginings it's accompanied by. Right in the midst of that, can there still be that purposeful pause extending the exhale? So in this facet, old Doug and Zenji talks a lot about the wither tree. He talks about what is this dropping off. And he says it's not deep serenity. It's not perfect stillness. You know, in some ways we could say it's like, don't be fooled. Don't be fooled by what comes up. Don't grasp it and struggle with it.

[18:05]

and just keep moving in those same patterns. I suspect that almost all of us have witnessed ourselves be in thought loops, repetitive thinking. Often when something's bothering you, it comes up, you wrestle with it for a little bit, drops away, and it pops right up again. So the request of practice is to both, in the midst of that, return to experiencing, and the accompanying request is to not get hung up on that state of mind just being what it is.

[19:07]

It is what it is. The breath, that particular exhale, is what it is. That mind, that breath, is the life force of being in that moment. It's not lacking anything. Yes, our mind, our emotions are having a response in relationship to it. the steadiness of sitting. Okay, exhale. Okay, exhale again. This is the withered tree. It's not everything's been dropped away in some great

[20:17]

accomplishment, or even in some great asceticism, you know, but more just as it is, there's a commitment to not just being more caught up in it. And the breath can support that. And as that becomes more continuous, that state is called samadhi. The more discontinuous it is, the more we're reinforcing and re-acknowledging those feelings and thoughts, the more elusive that other quality of being and that relationship to consciousness.

[21:25]

So this experiencing and then this big mind of however it is, is how it is. However your life is today is how it is. Maybe there's parts of it you're very happy with. Maybe there's parts of it you're very unhappy with. Maybe there's parts of how your life is now, it feels almost... too dangerous or painful to admit to yourself. Maybe there is an incessant yearning that has become so involved and so ingrained that it's almost like you don't know how to not be that person. Yeah? All of this with the exhale. All of this

[22:34]

that just soft, deep, releasing intention. It's like renewing our intention, renewing our vow, renewing our commitment. With each exhale, we return, we return, we return. And then with the inhale, we receive We allow the arising. I'll give you a taste of... At another time, Master Solzhan was asked by a monk, What is the roar of a dragon in a withered tree?

[23:37]

Sosan said, the lifeblood of all the Buddhas has never ceased flowing. And who are all the Buddhas? We are. The lifeblood of all the Buddhas has never ceased flowing. And then the monk, being like Zen people, keeps going and says, what about glowing eyes of the skull? What is it to see from that place? What is it to meet our life instead of being firmly engaged in the context of our usual thinking and feeling and the stories we have about who we are and what our life is and what has happened and what might happen, what is it to see the world from this place of something more settled, something more original?

[25:01]

So within the teaching of the Dharma, the way things are, this can have three expressions, this seeing. Sometimes we're seeing the particulars of the world according to me. This is how this moment is being experienced. This is the feelings that are evoked by this experience. These are the thoughts, the opinions, the judgments. It's like we're looking at something that's quite solid. There it is. That's what it is. And I hate it. I love it. I'm frightened by it. I'm saddened by it. Whatever. insight to study the ways to study the self and then the challenge for us is to see it in contrast to being hooked by it and swirled around by it you know and so the imagery of

[26:35]

The eyes, alive eyes, alive seeing, and the image of a skull is that the mind isn't filled with all its stuff, with all its thoughts and feelings and agitations and yearnings. The mind is seeing from a more direct place. these thoughts, these feelings, these images, and this way of the way that all that influences the breath, influences the body. And then as it's starting to be engaged in a more experiential, almost energetic way, a different kind of insight starts to happen.

[27:39]

Like a skillful thing sometimes, when your mind is quite caught up in something, can you shift your attention from the content of the thinking to experiencing the feeling? Usually when we're in the content, the content is reinforcing worldviews. It's reinforcing a notion of the self, a notion of other, a notion of right and wrong. If you can shift to the feelings, we're starting to shift to something more fundamental. And the more fundamentally we're experiencing the moment, the more it starts to feel like energy. Like as I was saying, when you come into Sashin and the shishin body of all those practitioners have been sitting. It's not that they're in deep samadhi, but the very process of sitting collectively, continually creates something.

[28:48]

Whether you do it by yourself or whether you do it collectively. And as we start to shift into that way of being, this very same event starts to become an interplay. You start to notice this thought, this story, is evocative emotionally. And that thought story, thought and feeling story, has a somatic influence. It influences the breath. It influences attention. And when that story drops away and is replaced by another one, there's a different construct.

[29:53]

You start to realize directly, experience that really what's been going through all the time is this interplay of different forces and energies. This is what our being is constructed of. And the more it's engaged as an experience, and the less we're energizing the content, the more it feels like a flow of thoughts and feelings, rather than we're sitting here remembering a solid, tangible world that's separate from here, separate in terms of space and time. The more it's just this interplay of arising that's happening right here.

[30:57]

And so these are the three layers of insight, the three layers of prajna. And so the monk is asking the teacher about this. He said, well, what about when the insight is active? What about when the eyes are glowing? The withered tree never ceases. Ceases. Ceases. Cease as in stopping. It never dries up. There's always this flow of energy.

[32:03]

Each one of these levels of insight or each one of these modalities of insight teaches us something about clinging and teaches us something about engaging the energy of the moment. And the monk, being a stubborn Zen student, continues. I don't get it. I can't understand. Is there anybody who understands? And the teacher answered, everyone, everyone throughout the world can understand.

[33:07]

try to wrap it up inside the world according to me, when we try to take ownership of it as I'm figuring it out, then if we pay close attention, we see that it's bigger than that. When we open to it, when we let it be experienced directly, Something in us gets it. Something in us realizes what's happening in the moment. Before dinner, we had what we call a practice period tea. And we asked questions and gave answers. And we did it in a particular fashion. the answer is quite pithy.

[34:24]

The way inquiry can be engaged is that usually when we answer, we jump back into, well, here's what I think. But when the answer is direct and to the point, it's almost like the embellishment that comes along with me is dropped off. And the interaction, question and response meeting, is more about engagement. It has more energy in its conciseness. And something draws us into the moment. Something draws us into that play of... of ideas and images that's happening right there. And it's not so much about, well, is that the right answer or the wrong answer?

[35:31]

It's the commitment to engagement that's going on right there. And this is very much the flavor of the Zen School. The commitment to engagement. As we do that, something comes alive. Something's realized beyond the content of the particular answer of the moment. Everybody can do it. So the teacher's bringing this up for the monk. And the monk says, I still don't get it.

[36:41]

I still don't get it. Are there any words that can adequately describe the dragon's roar? And the teacher says, I can't understand it. beyond that. And then Dogen, in recounting this story, says, and the monk still didn't get it. But as I said, you know, the interesting thing about Sashin, the interesting thing about a group of people sitting intently together. The interesting thing about tea. So we sat in the circle of tea.

[37:49]

There was 20-something of us. And very apparently, as appeared to me, in a heartfelt way, we asked questions and we gave answers. And something palpable happened. You know? And we sit to sheen. We bring... a wholehearted commitment to being present. And all sorts of stuff happens. You know, you daydream, you get agitated, you have your glimpses of insights, moments of concentration, all sorts of things happen. But somehow the continual intent and involvement and commitment brings forth Now, do we get it? Do we understand it? It's actually better that we don't.

[38:57]

If we put our effort into figuring it out, we're kind of belittling something powerful in our being. It's not about getting it. It's not about figuring it out. It's more about opening up to a process, opening up to some capacity in our humanness, some alchemy of attention, full commitment, engagement, and returning and returning. And out of that arises what, in the colorful language of this story, is these alive eyes, insight. We see. We see the world. We experience.

[40:02]

We realize. Not because we figured something out, but because it's always there, and when we open to it in that way, it's seen for what it is. So this is the heritage of insight in the Zen school. I was trying to see if there was another pithy phrase from Dogen. earlier on, he says, before you get really into practice, you think that he uses the image of the tree, that if you let the leaves drop off, springtime is not going to happen.

[41:12]

But actually, letting the leaves drop off in the fall is almost like a prerequisite for springtime. It's like breathing out is a prerequisite for breathing in. If you don't let it drop away, how does the next moment arise? Fresh, abundant, full of its being. If we're still clinging to the last one, we can't receive it. And yet there's something deep within our deep desire to live that says, don't let go. Whatever you do, don't let go. So we sit and we work, or we engage the breath, and it brings forth that energy.

[42:16]

And maybe we become agitated or frightened or desperate, or determined. I am going to conquer this, or whatever I'm going to do to it. But can we discover in that efforting something that goes beyond it? This is the great koan of zazen. And the practice of zazen is, Every breath, you get another shot at it. Okay, let's see that one again. What exactly happens when you breathe? Missed it again. Okay, once again. This is the dragon's roar. in the withered tree.

[43:23]

And it bears fruit. It brings forth insight almost despite ourselves. And so the Quite often in Zen, the whole process is wrapped in this strange imagery. Almost like an antidote to getting too caught up in the thinking. Let this exotic imagery conjure something up on a feeling level. Let it touch you in that way. Thank you.

[44:27]

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