This podcast is offered by the San Francisco Zen Center on the web at sfzc.org. Our public programs are made possible by donations from people like you. I hate her. He hates me. He thinks he's better than me. I'm better than him. I'm better than them. They're wrong. They're not fair. I'm no good. I'm unworthy. I'm much more worthy than he is. This is a good place. This is a bad place. I'm terrible. I'm worthless. This is not an easy thing to take care of in myself, and it's not easy to take care of in others. I'm excellent. I'm the best. That's not easy to take care of, and it's not easy to take care of in others.

[01:02]

However, I think if we do really take good care of these things, they won't evaporate. They're more like the ground in which a great flower grows. A great flower of compassion and wisdom grows in the ground. of these delusions. These delusions are the ground or the field in which Buddha grows. So Buddha grows in this ground of delusion when the roots of study go into the ground. The roots of examination, of calm and intimate embracing of these delusions grows wisdom and compassion. And it grows up a little ways if you study for a little while, and it grows further if you study longer. And the longer you study, the more the tree of compassion and wisdom grows.

[02:07]

It has no life aside from delusion. So it's hard to actually... It's hard for me to understand the end of the study of this delusion. And it's difficult also to actually study the delusion, to study the delusion and to study the delusion, to examine it, to quietly explore the farthest reaches of the causes and conditions of delusion. But this is the exact practice of the Buddhists. intimately study greed, hate, and delusion. Greed and hate are different from each other, but they're both based in delusion.

[03:17]

So, briefly, how do we study, how do we become authentically... deluded? How can we be authentic deluded beings? So briefly but all, briefly but comprehensively, the way we, the way we realize delusion, which is Buddhahood, the way we realize affliction, which is Buddhahood, the way we understand defilement, which is Buddhahood, briefly and all-inclusively, we do it by practicing giving. Ethical discipline. Patience. Diligence.

[04:19]

Concentration and wisdom. This is how we Realize delusion. And attain enlightenment. This is how we realize great enlightenment about delusion and in the midst of delusion. And the first step is a rather difficult one. Or just plain difficult. You can say rather... Extremely, impossibly, whatever. Anyway, the first step, it seems to be quite difficult, which is to actually be gracious to affliction. Be gracious to delusion. Be gracious to unskillful passions.

[05:25]

To welcome them. To welcome. To welcome hate. Yes. To welcome greed. To welcome pride. Arrogance. To welcome fear. To welcome anxiety. To welcome pain. To welcome pleasure. To welcome joy. To welcome depression. To welcome confusion. To welcome contempt of self and contempt of others. Yes, welcome all those things. Everything else.

[06:30]

Welcome all forms of life. Like them? No, I didn't say like. Hate? No. Welcome. Be generous towards every experience and every experience is... Could it be? Delusion? And then, practice ethical discipline. After you welcome, which is very difficult to do, but if you actually can welcome these difficult guests into your life, then practice ethics with them. Which is, you know, be very careful with them. Be careful with delusions. Be conscientious with them.

[07:34]

Be gentle with them. Be respectful of them. And again, this applies to all my own delusions. And my own delusions include the delusions I have about every other living being. So every person I meet, for me, when I meet you, you're not a delusion, but I have a delusion about you. I don't just meet you. I meet you with my delusion of you. Perhaps I should apologize. That when I meet you, I don't come empty-handed or empty-minded. I come with my handy-dandy version of you. Oh, here comes my friend. Here comes my pal. Here comes my enemy. Here comes the teacher. Here comes the student.

[08:36]

Here comes the child. Here comes the parent. Here comes the enemy. Here comes the skillful person. Here comes the unskillful person. I have my own. idiosyncratic belief or impression of everything that I experience. And can I welcome them all? I don't know. Do I wish to learn to welcome them all? Do I? Yes, I do. Have I ever regretted welcoming them so far? No. Have I ever regretted not welcoming them? Yes. I don't... I regret not welcoming... Then I just become a prisoner of delusion.

[09:36]

Most people are prisoners of their delusions because they do not welcome them. Now, if they welcome them, they're starting to become free of them. Become free of them by accepting that they're in your life. Become free of them by accepting that they're in your life. Becoming free of the prison of delusion by admitting you're in the prison of delusion. And saying, thank you very much, prison. Not that I like prison, but thank you I'm so glad to know I am in prison. I thought there might be some problem. I'm in the prison of my delusions. And I've heard that all living beings are living in the prison of their delusions. And that some have become authentic prisoners and thereby attained Buddhahood.

[10:52]

Some people are in the prison of their fears and have authentically, have become authentically afraid and become free of fear. Again and again and again and again. Virtually without end. But still, somehow continuing, because the fourth practice I mentioned is the practice of diligence, which is something I will talk about in two more steps. That you can be diligent about a practice, a difficult practice, like welcoming delusion and being careful and conscientious about delusion, welcoming your imprisonment in your own deluded mind, welcoming it and being careful of it, understanding that it's not going to end necessarily ever, that it maybe doesn't have an end.

[12:12]

That's why I have a problem with about to end them. Because ending is kind of like a mental construction. And then the next one, comes into play, patience. The third practice is patience. Patience with how long it takes to become welcoming and careful. Patient with how little welcoming I'm doing. Patience with how often I forget to welcome what comes to me. Patience with being not careful. Patience with myself not being careful. Patience with others not being careful. Patience with my lack of welcoming and patience with others who are not welcoming to me and themselves. And then comes diligence, which is enthusiasm about these first three practices and the next two practices, and it's also enthusiasm about enthusiasm.

[13:21]

That you actually... feel enthusiastic about learning to welcome the most difficult guests of life. And again, not liking, but welcoming for the sake of freeing beings from suffering. And enthusiastic about being patient with the urgency and of our situation. Not patient like, it's okay. No, patient like, it's painful and I want to be right here with the pain. Our ecological crisis is distressing and it isn't that patience is like, it's okay. It's more like, I want to be close to this situation to this problem.

[14:26]

I want to be as present with it as I can possibly be. And I feel enthusiasm about developing that kind of patience with this problem, with these problems. The root of this enthusiasm is aspiration to do the practices. And the root of the aspiration is to consider the cause and effect of not doing the practices and to consider the cause and effect of doing the practices. If I think about, if you think about doing these practices, you might come to aspire to practice them. If you think about how they might be beneficial, you feel more and more aspiration And if you think about what happens if you don't practice them, if you think about how harmful it is not to be generous, not to be gracious, not to be careful, and not to be patient, if you think about that and consider that, even though you can't see exactly how it works because we're deluded, but still somehow it makes sense that living a life of not welcoming life

[15:55]

is not the way to go. And actually, the other way is the way to go. And so I do have some energy in the midst of all my troubles, maybe even quite a bit of energy to do the practices. And then this energy to do these first three practices and these first three practices of generosity, ethical discipline, and patience These practices are the practices which benefit, which bring benefit to the situation of affliction. They bring benefit and welfare to the afflicted beings and to the afflictions. The next two practices... bring freedom from the affliction. The next two practices are concentration and wisdom.

[16:59]

And this enthusiasm is for practicing the beneficial practices and enthusiasm for practicing concentration and wisdom which liberate and cure, cure the afflictions. Cure the afflictions by making it clear that they are the ground in which wisdom and compassion grows. And so we have enthusiasm for practicing what I said at the beginning, practicing and being mindful and taking care of being serene, practicing tranquility, as much as possible throughout the day and night. Donate your unconcentrated, distracted, not calm self.

[18:12]

Donate that to your local charity. And give your life over to being tranquil. and concentrated. I'm sorry to say that... I'm kind of sorry to say that among worldly pleasures, it's the greatest pleasure, tranquility. But that's not the reason to do it. As a matter of fact, if you do practice tranquility, you might stumble upon the well-discovered fact that it is very pleasant to be calm. but then we must give away our calm, not hold on to it. We don't practice calm so that the practitioner becomes calm. We practice calm so that the practitioner can give her calm away, which deepens the calm and brings greater pleasure, which she gives away. And with this calm, we then can move to the great practice of now looking at delusion.

[19:21]

from a calm, relaxed, unmoving presence and see the way delusions really are. To decisively, certainly understand them and thereby be released, cut through them. trying to assemble the understanding in the community for this process of studying delusion.

[20:31]

We have an intensive year now, which seems to have a beginning and in some sense may seem to have an end, but I'm more thinking of the whole rest of our lives as studying delusion. And at the beginning of this year, to reiterate the importance of studying delusion in order to understand them and thereby realize great enlightenment. There's tremendous resources in the tradition for helping us get to a place where we can efficaciously study these problems. these afflictions. And I'm trying to develop the understanding so that we can go deeper and deeper into the study of delusion.

[21:34]

But before we study them and liberate them, we must love them. Wholeheartedly love them. Not like them. Just like you don't like if you have it. If you have a friend who's a drug addict, you don't like that they're a drug addict. But in order to free them, you have to love them. In order to see what would be helpful, you have to love the person who has this unskillful affliction. And we all have our addictions, which we need to discover and be kind to so that we can get ready to really understand them. So in the midst of great suffering, there is a little flame of enthusiasm for practicing the way of wisdom for the welfare of all beings.

[22:41]

And this flame can be nurtured and can grow and grow and grow. This little sprout can grow and grow and grow if we take care of it. But we have to remember to take care of our delusions, otherwise they sweep us into oblivion and we forget what our problems are. I forgot. What are our problems again? Do you remember? What's my problem anyway? Huh? What's my problem? Do you remember? I told you earlier, didn't I? What was it? Do you remember my problem? You forgot too? Anybody remember? I said I had a problem.

[23:41]

I forgot what it was. What was it? I'm deluded. Thank you. I knew I... Please remind me if I seem to forget. And actually, some people come to me and say, if you ever see me acting deluded, would you remind me? And I say, well, I'm willing to, but I don't know if I'll be able to because at the time I see it, you may not be in the mood for me to remind you. So I sometimes go to the person and say, did you ask me to remind you when you seem to be deluded? And they say, so what? So what? For more information, visit sfzc.org and click Giving.

[24:52]

May we fully enjoy the Dharma.

[24:55]

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