This podcast is offered by San Francisco Zen Center on the web at sfcc.org. Our public programs are made possible by donations from people like you. Welcome. And welcome to those of you who are online. Welcome to participate in this. a quiet, cloudy San Francisco day. Recently, I was introduced to a teaching by Christian monk from the 19th century, Gregor Mendel.

[01:09]

He had the distinction of being the forerunner of modern genetics. He experimented with different types of pea plant and realized that when you put this type with this type, you could get something that was a blend of both. And when you did it repeatedly, that blend varied. But what intrigued me was that he also came up with a very succinct expression about practice. And the English version translates something like this. Tension. Tenderness.

[02:10]

Tending. Tension. Tenderness. And I've been thinking about what it is to be having a one-day sitting in person. But that means being here in the Buddha Hall together with those of us who've been inside the COVID bubble, as we call it, of city center. And now today, wonderfully, those of you who are coming into this environment, part of me just thinks, oh, thank goodness. something of the good old days is being resurrected. I remember reading in a sutta that even in Shakyamuni's time, he and Mahakashapa had a recollection of the good old days when they were in the forest, just the five of them.

[03:27]

So, just to say, Is there such a thing as the good old days? But still, our mind conjures up its own remembrances. Maybe these are the wonderful new days where we can be in person and online. We can share both the particular of the moment and the vastness of interbeing. I've been thinking about what is it we cultivate when we're having a one-day sitting? Here's where my thoughts went. That practice, whether it's

[04:37]

formal seated Zazen, or the activities within, the formal activities within our practice environment, or whether it's what we do on an everyday basis, how we kick ourselves out into the world and involve it. Laura McLaughlin and Gregory, what's Gregory's last name? Snyder, thank you. And they gave a talk together online. And Gregory, Greg was mentioning how there's a similarity between the word justice and dharma.

[05:42]

and a similarity between the word dukkha. The etymology has the same root in both of them. And the etymology of dukkha also can be translated as transgression or crime. And yet, in the benevolence of practice, there is a radical and very significant shift into how they're related to. In the realm of the spiritual, dharma, the law of what is... wisdom.

[06:44]

And the expression of dukkha becomes compassion. Yes, there is a request of awareness. And one side of it is, it is what it is. Whatever's happening in this moment is what's happening in this moment. It goes beyond what we want to have happen, what we don't want to have happen, whether we like it or don't like it, whether we approve or disapprove, whether we think it's good or evil. Wisdom of what is, is. That it is what it is. And each moment is what it is.

[07:48]

And yet, and yet, our human nature is that we can't help but take it personally. bring these to wisdom and compassion. We bring them to the very activity of Zazen. We direct attention. We sit upright in an open, balanced, steady, stable position. And we direct and we open attention to experience what it is each moment. And yet, we can't help but take it personally.

[08:59]

Something in the very DNA of our being is discovering And asserting what it is to be alive. Bringing its biases, its prejudices, its hopes, its fears to each moment. And the primary sutra, if we could call it. Zen, this style of Zen, is the Sandokai, which usually we translate as the harmony of difference and equality, something like that. But we can also translate it as the harmony of wisdom and compassion.

[10:01]

And each time we sit, each time we practice Zazen, calling forth awareness of the moment. There can be an interplay of it is what it is, and here's the accompaniment of the world according to me, the hopes according to me, the understandings according to me. So I'd offer you this notion. harmony of the two. We pay attention to the moment and our attention, that attention gets drawn into some expression of conditioned existence. Some expression of the world according to me.

[11:08]

And even the paying attention can be infused with the bias of what I think should be happening, what I think should not be happening. And in that climate, in that environment, in that ecology, how do we nurture people? How do we nurture a benevolence that will invite the impulses, the agendas, the biases of me to find their relationship to the wisdom of it is what it is? this is what struck me about Mendel's categories, you know, tending tension, tenderness.

[12:27]

I think the strategy of Zazen is don't be surprised. when thoughts and feelings, when the world of me appears and hijacks your attention. But sit down knowing that the very expression of Zazen includes them both. That calling forth the wisdom of of suchness, to put it in a Buddhist term, or the wisdom of just this, will tend to call forth the urgent expression of me.

[13:33]

And there's a tension between them. Just when we When we're directing our involvement in the moment, you know, me will have its say. It should be like this. The mind should be calm and clear, receptive and open and flexible. And then while it's at it, it should also be patient. compassionate, benevolent, and skillful. Now, is that too much to ask? I think if we remind ourselves of this request and then say to ourselves, and of course, this is going to be

[14:44]

A messy business. But say it in a way. That has. A tenderness. Say it in a way. That has a benevolence. Oh yes. And this is what we're going through all the time. This interplay happens in our formal practice, and this interplay happens in whatever state of consciousness, whatever endeavor we're engaged in, even in our sleep. This interplay is still acting itself out. me, it's like the second bodhisattva vow.

[15:53]

The activity of consciousness is endless. Vowing to practice with it. The activity of zazen has no fixed goal. The activity of zazen is immersion in a process that discovers the harmony of these two aspects of being. And the very challenge of attending to it deliberately will highlight the tension. the more thoroughly we engage our body and our breath in attending to the moment, the more thoroughly we will notice when we're not attending.

[17:03]

That's the nature of it. I remember when I was practicing in Thailand quite a while ago, And I went to the teacher and I said, my mind is so restless. It's bouncing all over the place. It changes direction in less than a second. And the teacher said, very good. You're really becoming attentive. That's really good. What I thought was abject failure. took it and turned it on its head and said, that's very astute. And that helped me go back to my cushion and sit and become curious.

[18:21]

about what exactly was happening. Before, I was just utterly preoccupied by this is not what should be happening. Any moment in our life, we can declare this is not what should be happening. And often there's some thorough justification to it. This world, torn with wars, starvation, atrocities, this is now what should be happening. This me that can so easily slip into utter selfishness, I should be getting what I want. not what should be happening but it is so can we sit down and rather than draw up as an expression of our dedication a thorough conviction and intention to create what

[19:56]

would be happening. The antidote to this terrible world, to this terrible me, the antidote to conditioned existence. Can we sit down and even just intellectually remind ourselves it is what it is. In the wisdom of practice, there's forgiveness. There's patience. Can we enter the realm of awareness as a sanctuary, as a refuge? Can we take refuge in wisdom? So we can call that up in a mental way.

[21:08]

And then as we engage the body and the breath, we can explore how the contractions that can happen in our body, the contractions that can happen in our mind, the contractions that can harden our heart. They are what they are. And we will practice with them. In the midst of them, we will explore what is it to sit in a stable, upright, open, available way. What is it to let the breath soften and deepen and flow in and out? we are creating the purity of awareness.

[22:18]

Because we're getting in touch with all that it is. And emotionally, as we engage in this way, as we give ourselves that kind of liberating permission to just be, And all that it would last until the bell rings, ending the period. But usually, it lasts a couple of moments. And then you notice some detail of posture. Oh, that's not what it should be. Can there be a deliberateness that can track, start to track that?

[23:29]

Can there be a deliberateness that experiences that as it is? It is what it is. Before fixing it. Before attempting to make it what it should be. Can we attend with a deliberateness that discovers in its engagement how to let that deliberateness of involvement experience when the overlay of me and should and should not, can we introduce, can we cultivate that experiencing?

[24:39]

So Gregor Mendel said, tending, The first attribute is tending to the experience. The process of tending rather than fixing, you know, getting it right, accomplishing the goal. And on the side of compassion, the patience, the compassionate benevolence with the human condition. This is what it is to be human. In an emotional equation,

[25:42]

softening of our frustration for not getting it right. For not being a better practitioner. The softening of the urgencies of the dramas we're inclined to call forth in the midst of Zazan. The way we delve into the complexities of our psychological being. To bring a compassionate benevolence that wordlessly says, okay, okay, just let it be what it is. And in the midst of experiencing the contraction, can there be an involvement that starts to discover expansion?

[27:05]

The root of the word dukkha, the du is the root, is about contraction and ka. It's about being. Contracted being. And sukha, which doesn't get as much airtime. The su is about expansion. Can zazen be a nurturing involvement? Can zazen be a way... To alleviate the blatant and subtle distress of our being. Of course we don't like it. And of course we'd like to fix it. Get rid of it. Transform it.

[28:06]

Transcend it. Yes. all of that be held with compassion and a deep patience. Can we hold, even as Mandel says, can we hold the tension? Thorough engagement without a blatant or subtle version of what should happen. That the process of Zazen, the process, whether we're talking about Zazen as seated meditation or just awareness in general, or whether we're even talking about the broadness of spirituality, how did someone who

[29:15]

A monk who had a scientific bent that discovered the basis of genetics. He discovered the basics of genetics and he wrote it all up. Nobody paid any attention to it for decades. And then about 30 or 40 years after he died, people thought, they looked at it and thought, you know, this is really good. And now he's revered as the founder of modern genetics. But how could someone like that not only discover the genetics of pea plants, but also discover the heart of the process of practice? Yeah.

[30:18]

There is this interplay within us. It's very helpful to allow for that. And then the tending in terms of bringing harmony, it's not saying, so don't bother. Whatever you do, self is going to express itself anyway. Why even bother? No. Finding the middle way between laxity, looseness, and the tight determination of fixing. The harmony is very different from battle of good and evil between the two.

[31:22]

That's exhausting. Attuning with the harmony will be nurturing. We discover a deep forgiveness. We discover an acceptance. we discover how to tend to our own being and others' being. We start to discover the tenderness. Maybe it is working with the Pea plants. Mendel discovered, oh, I have to be really careful with how I engage these tender shoots so that they don't break, so that they don't simply become inert.

[32:43]

I have to tend to their life. In a tender way. And as we do that. With our own being. We discover something. You know, one of the seven factors of awakening. is inquiry. There's mindfulness and then inquiry. As we start to see what's going on more closely, we become intrigued. It's not what it should be. kind of inert version of reality.

[33:57]

But what is it? What is the interplay of this moment? What was the energy? What was the intrigue of that thought that just hijacked my attention? And how did that process go? through the body? How did it influence the breath? How did it create a disconnection between here and now and what was going on? This is the intrigue of Zazen. This is the intrigue of any interaction, either internally or externally. This is how we shift from justice and crime to wisdom and compassion.

[35:16]

We can experience it in the intimate workings of our own being, and we can also see how it offers the world we put together. It offers it a similar kind of harmony. That the internal is also being expressed, not just externally, Interpersonally. Interactively. This existence. Is one. Network. Of interaction. So I'd encourage you today. To.

[36:16]

Call forth. A deliberateness. Pull it forth with a quality of tenderness. Yes, there's tending. But also the tenderness. And when the tension arises, so be it. Another thing to learn from. This is not the first moment in your life that you've... your own amazing dedication to practice and your own amazing impulse to self-absorbed thinking and feeling. Can you study it? Can you learn from it? I don't mean to say it's all what we think.

[37:18]

No, as we settle more, it becomes more what we feel. more what we experience in the body, more how we're noticing the states of mind. And even when you lose track, especially in sitting, when you lose track of your awareness in the moment, then when you come back to awareness, pause right there and experience that. This affirmation of it is what it is. This affirmation of enacting the Bodhisattva vow. Dugan Zenji, the finder of this style of Zen, he said,

[38:25]

a mystical and magical process. We cultivate the process. Each of us has a full storehouse of things to study. Each of us is challenged to discover hey, what is it to be this person I call me? And as we explore it, it has the very teachings within it that will alleviate our suffering and open our being to liberation. As you move off your cushion to kinhin, as you move off your cushion to eating, cleaning, however it might be.

[39:42]

With deliberateness, can you carry that awareness to the next thing, the next activity? And you carry it with a curiosity. Hmm. Let's see how this goes. There's a way in which the mind can be enlivened, engaged, become flexible. from immersion in the process. It's not establishing the goal that you want it to be and then forcing it to happen. It simply doesn't work. It's staying with the process, the basic teachings, the basic practices, tending to the basic practices and

[40:58]

grows does it grow according to our agenda usually not but it grows all the same because there's something amazing within our human consciousness that lights up when we bring and of spacious attention to it. Thank you. Thank you for listening to this podcast offered by the San Francisco Zen Center. Our Dharma Talks are offered free of charge, and this is made possible by the donations we receive. Your financial support helps us to continue to offer the Dharma. For more information, please visit sfcc.org and click giving. May we all fully enjoy the Dharma.

[42:03]

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