Good morning. Welcome to Hoshinji, Beginner's Mind Temple. And I want to welcome anyone, especially anyone who's here for the first time. Is anyone here for the first time? Special welcome to you, and I hope you find something nourishing here today in your visit to Zen Center. My name is Tova Green. I'm a resident here, and currently I have two positions. One is the person who connects the liaison for all of our branching streams, temples, and Zen centers around the country and in other countries. There are about 80 altogether. And my other... is currently Zen Center's secretary. I've been a resident for 20 years, and I really enjoy living and practicing in this temple.

[01:11]

I also want to welcome those who are participating this morning online, and wherever you may be. And thank you... everyone for coming. It's a very blustery morning out there. I think we're going to have a lot of rain. And so thank you for spending part of this day here. I thought I'd just give a little context for this talk. This is the last Saturday talk, except for next week, which will be a special talk. because the last Saturday talk of our practice period, this fall practice period, we've been focusing on the theme of awake body, awake mind. And led by our senior Dharma teacher, Christina Lanehair, thank you for inviting me to give this talk. And I also want to thank our head of practice, Mary Stairs, who invited me.

[02:18]

And I always thank my teacher, Agent Linda Cutts, who has given me much support and guidance for over 20 years. I feel very fortunate. So my theme for this talk, partly because we've just had the Thanksgiving holiday and It's the beginning of the season of giving. The title of my talk this morning is On Giving. And I also wanted to mention that next, starting tonight, actually we'll be starting a seven-day retreat, a sashin, here at Zen Center. And that's why next Saturday's talk will be a very special talk, because it will be the end of the sashin. So during the practice period, I co-taught a class with Nancy Petran on embodying the precepts.

[03:32]

And there are two precepts related to the theme of giving. And... I'll say a little bit more about what those two precepts are. And because the theme of the practice period is awake body, awake mind, we included some ways of being more aware of our physical experience of each precept. So when I talk about those precepts this morning, I'll also focus a bit on how we experience them in our bodies. Giving is also the first of six precepts what we call paramitas, qualities that we can cultivate to awaken our heart-mind. And that process of awakening is also thought of as awakening the mind of the bodhisattva, a mind that is fresh and receptive and engaged in...

[04:48]

listening to the cries of the world. It's a phrase that means being responsive to other people's suffering as well as our own. But to see ourselves as part of a connected web of relationship, you could say. So back to the precepts related to giving, the two precepts are phrased in, all of the precepts can be phrased in different ways. There are actually 16 precepts that we relate to. The first three are taking refuge in Buddha, Dharma, and Sangha. The second ones are more general and relate to avoiding harmful action, engaging in beneficial action, and living and being lived for the benefit of all beings.

[06:01]

And then we have 10 more specific precepts. And the ones that relate to giving can be phrased either in a prohibitory way or So the first one is, I vow not to take what is not given, or I vow not to steal. But there's another way of putting it in the affirmative, which is I take up the way of taking only what's freely given and giving freely of all that I can. I take up the way of taking only what's freely given and giving freely of all that I can. And then there's another precept about I vow not to be avaricious or greedy, but the affirmative is I vow to be generous. And I think it's helpful to explore both aspects of those precepts.

[07:05]

And what are precepts? You may wonder if you're here for the first time and you aren't familiar with that phrase or word. The precepts can be seen as beacons that help to guide us and help us find our way when we're unclear about what might be the ethical way of speaking or of acting in our everyday lives. And they're all connected and they all are a source of endless study. We can receive, there's a phrase, receiving the precepts in a ceremony. When we study the precepts and we sew a rock suit, some people are wearing these rock suits that we sew ourselves and we receive them in a ceremony where we agree to follow these precepts. And the precepts are also part of Buddhist, Zen Buddhist weddings and funerals.

[08:07]

So they're guidelines that last our... entire lives and there's always more to learn about them, always more to study, which is one reason why I really enjoy teaching the precepts. So I'll start by talking about taking what isn't given and then look at what might keep us from giving freely and then talk about some ways in which we may be able to give to ourselves, to one another, and to the world. And I invite you as I speak to just notice what sensations you're experiencing in your body. When do you feel alert? When do you feel sleepy? When might you be feeling tensed? When might you be feeling relaxed? So taking up the...

[09:11]

of not taking what isn't given or taking only what is given freely. I thought I would start with a story, and this is a story about myself and my teacher. When I was in... When I was in a practice period, a three-month period of study at Tassajara, the Mountain Center, which my teacher was leading, I had the position or the work practice role, the role of being her attendant. It was called Anja. And that included cleaning her cabin and making a fire in the morning when it was cold. And... making sure that she had snacks in the cabin.

[10:12]

And so I usually baked cookies for her, and I would also fill a couple of jars with nuts and dried apricots. And I really like dried apricots. Some of you might know where this story is going. So one day she was... As usual, she often left the cabin while I was cleaning it to do something else. And for some reason that day, I just had a craving for apricots. So while she was gone, I took a few apricots and ate them and enjoyed them. And she came back, and I didn't say anything about it. And then I started to feel really uncomfortable when I was around her. I had done something I wasn't confessing to. I hadn't... I don't know why I didn't ask her if I could have some apricots, but I didn't. I just took them.

[11:13]

And that clearly was, for me, an example of taking what isn't given. So finally I met with her in a one-to-one discussion. We call that dokasan. And I told her I had taken the apricots. It was actually... felt a sense of relief to tell her. And I was expecting either to be punished in some way, or maybe she would say, well, I can't trust you to be my Anja anymore. But none of that happened. Instead, she just said, when we begin practicing with the precepts, or as we practice with the precepts, there's less and less wiggle room. So something that might seem very small actually seemed very big to me because I hadn't asked for the, I had just taken what wasn't given. And I think, you know, as I've reflected on that, well, there was a sequel to that.

[12:30]

which was the next time I was in her cabin cleaning and she went out, she said, by the way, help yourself to some apricots. So she was very generous. And when the apricots were freely given, I could wholeheartedly enjoy them. I didn't have that feeling of, oh my goodness, this isn't okay. So I think it's, you know, just to notice with our bodies, sometimes we have that feeling in our body when we've perhaps taken someone... There are many ways this precept can be interpreted. It's not only about material things. So it can relate to taking someone's time or attention. For example, sometimes when I... and you may have experienced this, I call somebody, and now we all have cell phones, and I call someone on their cell phone and start talking about something without checking, is this a good time for you to talk to me?

[13:42]

It may not be, and often someone will say, well, I can't right now, I'm driving or whatever, but it's not assuming that the person is going to have time for a conversation. because I have time for that conversation. Or sometimes it can have to do with touching someone in a way that's not wanted, like hugging, just assuming someone's going to want to hug if I want to hug. And so I've taken to checking it out. Would you like a hug, or is it okay if I'd like a hug? Is this a good moment for you? It may sound, I don't know. maybe too formal, but I feel it's also a way of checking out whether that would be wanted. In our society right now, there's so many examples of unwanted touching that I think it's perhaps made some of us more aware of that dimension of taking what isn't wanted.

[14:56]

On a broader scale, this precept can also lead us to look at what we consume and ways in which we might be overusing or misusing some of the resources of the planet. I think with each of the precepts, we can look at how we relate to them internally, how we relate to them with others, and how we relate to them on a much broader scale. It may have to do in terms of taking care of the environment and our planet with small things like turning off lights periodically at our work circle. In the morning, somebody will mention all the lights that weren't turned off the night before. Or it can have to do with... walking or riding a bicycle to do an errand instead of getting into your car.

[16:02]

Small things, but sometimes we might not think about. Probably we leave the lights on because we're not really thinking that we're leaving a room where we're the last person and the lights are on, and thinking about something else. And... I think this precept... More recently, I've been really looking at my privilege as... In many ways, I feel very privileged. I feel very privileged to live here. I feel privileged as a white person in our society. And the precept can lead to an exploration of how we embody privilege due to race, gender... age or sexual orientation or physical ability. And it may lead those of us who are white-bodied to look at how we benefit from our white skin privilege, and that might lead us to study history, how the concept of whiteness was constructed to benefit white people at the expense of Native Americans and African Americans, to look at the legacy of slavery.

[17:23]

and to come to a deeper awareness of white supremacy culture and how pervasive it is in white-dominated institutions, including this beloved San Francisco Zen Center. And then having that awareness can lead us to see how we can contribute to changing some of those conditions. And that's something we're working on here at Zen Center, I feel it's such an important aspect of creating the kind of community that I would like to see that's more inclusive and supportive of everyone who wants to practice here. So that if we look at So I'm going to transition to how we can give freely of all that we can give.

[18:27]

And this part of the precept also includes more than we may think. It's not only about what we give materially, giving non-perishable food to the food bank or giving money to non-profits. It... reaches into how we are with the spirit of giving our time, our energy, our talents, and our commitment. And there may be times when we feel we don't have much of anything to give. We don't have much energy, or we don't have much time, or we may feel we don't have many material resources. So I'm going to invite you, if you would, to just experiment with a manifestation of how it may feel when we don't have much to give. And I'm going to ask if you would just hold one or both of your hands in a fist and clench your fingers tightly.

[19:35]

And you may want to close your eyes, but you can keep them open if you wish. And just to see how that gesture feels you know, in your forearms, in your chest, in your belly. And then allow your fingers to open and your hands to open and see if you notice any changes in other parts of your body as you open your hands. There's a... a phrase, opening the hand of thought, that I think relates to this feeling of opening our hands and being able to give more freely. And I think the question comes up for me...

[20:46]

When I don't feel I have enough, what is lacking? Where does that come from? And the question, well, what is enough? Christina in her teaching has been talking about what is just enough? And when are we good enough? We don't have to be perfect. What is this thinking we're not good enough, we don't have enough? Where does it come from? Sometimes it comes from some inner lack, something we feel we are missing. Sometimes it may come from feeling separate from other people. And can we notice those feelings in mind states? and accept them, investigate them, and be kind to ourselves at those moments when we feel that sense of lack.

[21:56]

And not react by trying to fill the space in some way that may be harmful to ourselves or others. So when we... are able to give freely that can help us let go of some of our narrow views, which can have to do with thinking of some of our own limitations or narrow views we may have of other people. There's a story about this. Actually, this is leading into thinking about the paramita of giving... the paramitas are six ways of also nourishing this mind of awakening. And the first of the six paramitas is about giving.

[22:58]

It's called Dhanaparamita. There's a wonderful new book by Norman Fisher, a former Zen Center abbot. called The World Could Be Otherwise. And he brings in using our imaginations to expand our ways of relating to each other and the world. And he tells the story in his discussion of the paramita of giving about a monk many centuries ago in China who asked Zen master Bai Zhang, why giving is the gateway to the bodhisattva path? Why is giving the gateway to awakening? And Bai Zhang answered that it's because to practice giving is to practice letting go. And the monk then asked, what do we let go of?

[24:02]

Bai Zhang replied, you let go of narrow views. You let go of the ideas that things are small and tight. graspable and possessable. So you're opening your hands wide and this is the spirit of generosity and it also can open our thinking about ourselves and others. I thought I would illustrate that with a poem. It's a poem by One of my favorite poets, Naomi Shihab Nye. Are there any people who are familiar with her poems? One of her poems, Kindness, is very well known. And this one is a little less well known. It's called Red Brocade. Naomi Shihab Nye teaches every summer at Tassahara with our senior Dharma teacher, Paul Haller.

[25:07]

And her... Her father was Palestinian and her mother American. She grew up in Ferguson, Missouri, and spent some time in Jerusalem when she was young. So she has a very strong connection to the Middle East, and you'll see that in this poem. Red Brocade. The Arabs used to say... When a stranger appears at your door, feed him for three days before asking who he is, where he's come from, and where he's headed. That way, he'll have strength enough to answer. Or, by then, you'll be such good friends, you don't care. Let's go back to that. Rice? Pine nuts?

[26:09]

Here, take the red brocade pillow. My child will serve water to your horse. No, I was not busy when you came. I was not preparing to be busy. That's the armor everyone puts on to pretend they had a purpose in the world. I refuse to be claimed. Your place is waiting. We will snip fresh mint into your tea. I love that poem because it's really about welcoming everyone, welcoming the stranger before asking who he or she is, where they're from, where they're headed, just offering them what you have, whether it's a cup of tea or a red brocade pillow. And that attitude is one I... of giving and generosity, giving freely of what we have.

[27:12]

And I just want to quote Norman Fisher in The World Could Be Otherwise. He says, to practice giving is to appreciate the natural abundance of being and the inherent generosity of time and space, the ongoing unfolding of life. These are exquisite gifts. Life is abundant and expansive, never stingy or small-minded. It keeps on bubbling up and expanding wherever it has a chance. I think that's one of the things I love about the rain because it brings... that kind of bubbling up in things that are waiting for it to just begin to appear, and the hills turn green, and that kind of quality of life that comes at this time of year.

[28:28]

And... One way to cultivate this expansive attitude, it's sometimes called magnanimous mind, big mind, spacious mind, is through our meditation practice. Mind or awareness itself is wide without boundary. These are also words of Norman Fisher. Within this wide openness, which is always there, although we don't always notice it, Thoughts and feelings arise and pass away. So that brings me to talking, I just want to talk a little bit about the upcoming Sashin, which starts tonight and will go all week. Many of us in this room will be participating in it. And Sashin literally means gathering the heart-mind. And I... We can think of it as a gift we're giving ourselves and one another.

[29:33]

This early December sishin leads up to a ceremonial celebration of Buddha's enlightenment. And people will be sitting this week at Green Gulch Farm as well as here at Berkeley Zen Center and at many other Zen Centers all around the country. If you're not able to sit the sishin, you may find... want to find a way to have a sashin at home by sitting, meditating every morning or having a silent meal once a day or refraining from listening to the radio when you're driving. You may find some small way that you might want to share this experience that is manageable for you. So, There are many ways we can express this feeling of generosity, and I'd like to come close to the end of my talk with one other poem that I feel is an expression of giving what we can.

[30:51]

It's called Small Kindnesses, and it's by a... a poet who lives in Santa Cruz named Anusha Lameris. Small Kindnesses. I've been thinking about the way when you walk down a crowded aisle, people pull in their legs to let you go by, or how strangers still say, bless you when someone sneezes, a leftover from the bubonic plague. I didn't know that. Don't die, we are saying. And sometimes when you spill lemons from your grocery bag, someone else will pick them up. Mostly we don't want to harm each other. We want to be handed our cup of coffee hot and to say thank you to the person handing it.

[31:54]

to smile at them and for them to smile back, for the waitress to call us honey when she sets down the bowl of clam chowder, and for the driver in the red pickup truck to let us pass. We have so little of each other now, so far from tribe and fire, only these brief moments of exchange. What if they are the true dwelling of the holy? These fleeting temples we make together when we say, here, have my seat. Go ahead, you first. I like your hat. So I think that this poem is just a celebration of the many ways we can be kind to one another. We can, by doing that, make such a difference in one another's lives.

[33:05]

And I see those moments of kindness every day in this community. And I think that's one of the... one of the reasons why, I won't say why we're all here, but I do think that being here together, practicing together, sharing meals together, can help us cultivate that spirit of generosity. And perhaps for those of you who don't live here, that may be something that brings you back you know something that you appreciate when you come you can feel it and take it with you when you leave so one of the things that we that we do as a way of sharing the benefit of our practice at the end of every morning service we do a dedication of merit and it's the practice of

[34:18]

transferring or giving away any merit that we may have experienced through our meditation practice or our chanting. We do a well-being ceremony once a week for people who are ill and send that energy towards people who are in need of healing. So I thought we might end today, end this talk with a Dedication of Merit, and I'm going to ask if you would join with me. So I'll say a phrase and ask you to say it with me, and there'll be three phrases. And only if you're willing. So, may I be peaceful, happy, and at ease. May I be peaceful, happy, and at ease. be peaceful, happy, and at ease.

[35:19]

May we be peaceful, happy, and at ease. May all beings be peaceful, happy, and at ease. May all beings be peaceful, happy, and at ease. So thank you very much for your presence this morning and your attention. And yeah, time to end.

[35:44]

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