This podcast is offered by San Francisco Zen Center on the web at sfcc.org. Our public programs are made possible by donations from people like you. Good evening. Welcome to my Darm Talk. My name is Yogetsu Akasaka. I'm from Japan. I'm from Soto Zen School in Japan, and I'm a priest of Soto Shield in Japan. And this is my third time to have a Dom Talk in San Francisco Zen Center. And I am so honored to be back here. So last two times, I was invited as a guest teacher to have a concert and to have a Dom Talk. But this time, I came and stayed as a guest student.

[01:02]

So this experience is very interesting to me to think about what's beginner's mind. So back to starting point of Zen practice. As if it knows about beginner's mind as an attitude for practicing Zen, I fortunately having this opportunity to really experience this beginner's mind. Cleaning the bathroom. This is the whole point. Thinking about duality and non-duality.

[02:11]

What is good and bad? What is like and dislike? We can always sense our perception and our belief. recognition through observing ourselves when we see something we don't really like we feel something arises in ourselves with some sensation or emotion and then you can see yourself through that emotion and sensation. And being honest, you can know yourself that, oh, I still have some judgment, some dualistic mind deciding, judging what is good and what is bad.

[03:23]

And through that perception and sensation, unconsciously you start thinking. Oh, I don't want to do this. I don't like this. Oh, this smells so bad. This looks so dirty. And then some story happens in your mind. Maybe you will think, oh, I don't want to do this anymore. This is not my job. Why they don't hire cleaners? So I would say cleaning a bathroom is, I would say, one of the best Zen practices. But unfortunately,

[04:25]

The bathroom and the city center, they're all clean. They're all new. But still, I had this thought, seeing in the bathroom, and they're very clean, they're very new, But still, I see some spots. I see some red mold start happening, start growing. And then I like clean. So I see things and I'm like, oh, why don't they just keep cleaning this? Because this is still so new.

[05:26]

So we have to keep this really clean. But at the same time, wait, wait, wait. We cannot keep everything the same. As fundamental teaching of Buddhism, everything flows. Everything is impermanent. cleaning new bathrooms also get old dirty little by little even if we keep cleaning but I notice myself I have some attachment for I want to keep these all clean but I notice it and oh but this is also how it goes how everything goes

[06:28]

I cannot keep an eye in the bathroom every single day. And I'm not the person who lives here permanently. So, oh, this is my thought. This is my idea. Still, I notice myself. Oh, I like things to be clean, but not to be too attached. It's finding a good balance. And also back to the point, the concept. The core essence of doing all the practices in a mindful way, this is also what I really wanted to practice.

[07:47]

How I keep myself in a very mindful state while I'm cleaning the bathroom. So using my full body awareness, from my fingertips to my toe, I feel my whole body. And then put the paper to clean the sink, for example. Take the sponge. And feeling the sensation, how I rub the sink. How I the sensation that I'm rubbing the floor of the shower room. And using this awareness, the cleaning itself can be really meditative.

[08:48]

Sitting in Zhajin in silence, you sit in silence. But cleaning the bathroom, meditate, get into the meditative state with emotion. And there are some triggering points. Smells. And some dirty stains. Maybe you don't really want to see and you don't really want to go. And that moment, you start feeling some sensation and emotion. and you can notice some stories start happening in your mind. So I would say, if you think yourself, practice really enough, but then practice, just go back to the cleaning the bathroom. And I also had some opportunity

[10:00]

to do some painting. I painted some closet. The closet inside is getting old. And I restored the closet. So painting is also interesting. Painting can be really meditative as well. And through the painting, the wall, and at the same time, through seeing all those old walls and doors, I sense the history of this center. How old is this painting? 40 years old, 50 years old, even older than that?

[11:01]

So this painting is all under me What kind of people are practicing in those periods? And thinking about the history behind this wall I was feeling somehow deep appreciation this center was made and how this center has been maintaining in a really proper way and still there are a lot of people coming in and people know this place is a mecca of American Zen So during that practice of painting, I was practicing how I can tap into meditative state through my movement, from my hand to toes, from the sensation that I can feel through the brush, and seeing how the wall is painted.

[12:38]

through my movement, and at the same time, still trying to feel the, trying to be the fully body awareness. This is not easy, but at the same time, if you're fully into it, You are actually the brush. You synchronize to the wall, to the door, and to the building. So I find myself, oh, this is Zen practice. This is how Zen practice is so special through doing nothing special.

[13:42]

This is how the Zen practice works. Having some realization through nothing special. For doing this practice, You don't even need a robe. You just need to have some intention to tap into that state. So back to this beginner's mind. I've been having great time staying here, to be honest. And I really appreciate the daily routine. Wake up in the early morning, sit Zazen with everyone, and having morning service with everyone.

[14:51]

This is so precious. In Japan, once you leave the monastery and become a priest, you never become a monk and practice in the monastery anymore. Maybe you can become a teacher come back as a teacher, but it cannot come back as a practitioner. That's how I appreciate this experience more, even more. So back to the beginner's mind. I'm really having a beautiful experience, having a good time to be here. And let me talk about my history a little bit.

[16:00]

Maybe some of you are seeing me for the first time. So here in San Francisco Zen Center, people come to practice. People come to practice Zen. And the people know more or less about Zen. Buddhism is all about how we can live This life with less suffering. But in Japan, most people's idea about Buddhism is, oh, Buddhism is all about doing funerals and memorial services and Buddhist temples for cemeteries. Buddhist temple and cemeteries always together. And temple is a place for doing funerals and memorial services.

[17:05]

And priest's main job is doing funerals and memorial services, making a temple. And succeeding a temple, generation to generation. So, The reason I became a monk is because of my father. He became a monk later in his life. When I was in high school, he left home and became a monk and practiced in the monastery. He left home and after years of practice, he became a priest of local temple. And since then, once in a while, he asked me if I'm interested to succeed him.

[18:11]

At that time, I was still early 20s. So I was like, no, no. You do it, I won't do it. Because my idea was also hey, Japanese Buddhism is all about doing funerals and memorial services, right? I'm not interested in funerals. I don't want to do that sad job. I want to have some happy job. But I was at the same time interested in my spiritual growth? Like, true happiness, my purpose of life, what is really important in this life? How I can be really happy and satisfied with my own life?

[19:20]

That was my biggest question. and I read many books about self development, self improvement, spirituality, psychology, and I got this conclusion that hey, true happiness is all about insight. That's how many people say, especially in spirituality, also in Buddhism, of course. That's how I was also interested in spirituality, my spiritual growth. And then, at some point, I got this conclusion that, oh, okay, if I can change my own perspective about Japanese Buddhism, just doing funerals and memorial services,

[20:27]

Wait, even doing funerals can be really meaningful, of course, because funeral is a ceremony between life and death. So becoming a priest can be really meaningful. And then at my birthday of 30, staring at stars in my temple, and I had big inspiration, oh, this is going to be my thing in the future. Then after years, I became a monk. I found my teacher, was a former head priest of Sojiji Sotoshu head monastery.

[21:39]

And his name is Koshu Itabashi. So he passed away about four years ago. And I practiced at his monastery. And There are two teachings that I usually refer to. One is one breath, then to another is a true experience of our life. We can feel what our life is through the breath the second just be as you are from his presence I learned so much how just be as you are

[23:03]

It's so important to have inner freedom. Even if he was a head priest of Soros and school, he was always just being himself. He never behaved that he was a really top priest. He was even charming to people. And that's how people got so attracted by his presence. And he also taught us, live like cats. Cats are so free. When it's cold, they find some cold place, and then find some warm place.

[24:13]

And when it's hot, they find cool place. Never criticize. Just be as they are. If they get hungry, they meal. So that's also his teaching. So, be as you are, and one breath, this breath, then to another. This is the experience of life. Those two teachings I would like to apply my way of sharing the experience of sand.

[25:15]

So I've been a musician for many years, and I'm applying music to practice meditation, tap into the meditative state. Music can be a really good support for people, who struggle usually struggle with sitting meditation in silence. And also a little bit doing breath work helps so much to tap into that state. So I would like to guide you a little bit doing something I usually offer people. I little bit guide you to do gentle breath work. Not that hard that I usually guide. Really gentle one. And I play a little bit instrument. And you can close your eyes.

[26:23]

And sense the feeling. And sense what's coming inside of yourself. if you like you can close your eyes deeply inhaled to your nose and out through the mouth again into your nose

[27:33]

through the mouth. In. And out. In. Out. In. Last one.

[28:55]

And hold the breath. Close your mouth. Keep noticing a sensation. Ten. Nine. Eight. Seven. Six. Five. into your nose, and hold again. Ten, nine, eight, seven.

[30:04]

mouth and keep relaxing. . [...]

[31:35]

... [...] Thank you. me tudo uchi akmu toku imu shoto kobodai sata hei anhyahala mita koshin nuke

[32:57]

. [...] Satsang with Mooji Thank you.

[34:24]

Thank you. I'm so sorry

[35:34]

For more information, please visit sfcc.org and click Giving. May we all fully enjoy the Dharma.

[36:25]

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