This podcast is offered by the San Francisco Zen Center on the web at www.sfzc.org. Our public programs are made possible by donations from people like you. I don't know whether this is helpful or not, if this is beneficial or not. In fact, really, We never know what is beneficial or the most helpful. But maybe for a moment, if you're willing, you could just find right now, along with me, where your sit bones are. Can you find them? Can you feel them? How they're supporting you? Your spine, it supports your spine, your head.

[01:06]

Are you balanced, leaning forward to the side? Are your hands folded in each other, resting on your thighs? Are you warm, cold? Your hands are in the cosmic mudra. Is there enough open space for there to be the flow of the universe? And then there's the next breath. without which all of this would end.

[02:14]

So I don't know if this is helpful or not, but somehow just really being present, I believe is helpful. our practice lends itself to that. Just a few moments ago, in that same vein, we just put our palms together and we chanted and we bowed. And for some of us that are here doing that regularly, was that just an automatic thing? Did we notice? did you feel it? palms together I would give myself maybe a C plus and some years back when I was in a class with our abbess she suggested the possibility that one hand is compassion and the other is wisdom and that in that bow

[03:39]

I say at our heart level, we bring those together. And at Tassajara, we bow to each other a lot on the path, not only in the meditation hall, and here, some so. But I think that at any point, we can actually manifest this bow, or because of our great powers of visualization, we can imagine this bow, at the grocery store, gas station, meeting or leaving a friend. When I first came out of Tassajara, and I would go to the Safeway, and the checker was so kind, I would like do this, then I'd have to remember that I was not in the monastery. So there's something kind of powerful about bringing these hands together and really acknowledging the moment and the person or the situation in front of you.

[04:43]

Today, I thought that I would like, been thinking about what I would like to talk about, and my mind kept coming back to the topic of happiness. in our practice we talk about joyful mind not so much happiness but happiness is a state of well-being or contentment or satisfaction or maybe you might say non-contention not struggling with the reality that's in front of us and just as I say that some of you might have heard me say this story before but I'm just remembering for those of you that have been here for a while At one point, this zendo was under renovation and we had this big white circus tent out on the front lawn, which is now a parking lot for the construction people.

[05:52]

And there was a Dharma talk and that particular Dharma talk was Norman Fisher. And he said, what is the sum total of the Buddha's teaching. And I thought, I've heard this before, but I can't remember. But this time, I'm ready. Kind of leaned in to make sure I got it. And he said, non-contention. And I kind of had this physical experience of springing back and thinking, I never heard that before. Or I should say in that way. So I feel that this happiness or settledness is about non-contention and not struggling with things as it is. And as I was considering this topic of happiness and well-being,

[07:05]

Normally we talk about the cessation of suffering, so this is just another spin maybe on that. I found out, and maybe some of you already know this, that there's an app. I don't know if they're still doing the study. There's an app called Track Your Happiness. Anybody here know about that? No. I don't know if they're still doing the study, but it was two gentlemen from Harvard. One of them was... Daniel Gilbert, who wrote the book Stumbling Into Happiness. Anyway, what they discovered is they could create this app and the people who signed up three to five times a day randomly would get a little thing on their iPhone, I guess. And they would ask questions like, what are you doing right now? How do you feel?

[08:08]

What are you doing right now? And are you thinking about something other than what you're doing? Those were the three basic questions. And what they found, and then you would rate, then you would go back and rate yourself on your happiness quotient or your satisfaction quotient. And what they found is that no matter what people were doing, even if it was something they hated, that if they were like right there for what they were doing, and they weren't mind wandering somewhere else, thinking about another time or another place, their happiness quotient was actually pretty high. And it didn't matter if it was what they liked or they didn't like, or if what they intended, but their mind was like, completely present so it seemed like and it didn't even matter whether they were wondering mind wandering into something more pleasant like I could be in Hawaii right now it didn't matter it was more like were they just there so I

[09:23]

think a lot about the training that we're doing here this place is a training place maybe we could say our life as a training as a training if you so choose to take it up and what are we training in I would say one piece of what we're doing is training in presence or being there for what's happening sometimes we language it like not turning away and not touching or don't move or stay like you were training your puppy dog stay and not in a harsh way but just come back or we count breath right that's a presence practice in the kitchen I'm inviting the kitchen to participate in a presence practice when they're putting away pots and pans and bowls and washing dishes.

[10:31]

And I have the inflated view that I have the power to hear in the noise that's being made whether somebody is present or not. Because I've studied this quite a bit. And I can sense from the clanging and the banging, whether it's like, we gotta get out of here, why are we still doing this? As opposed to, now I'm washing this big pot, I feel the weight, I see what needs to be cleaned, I can lift it from my center and place it. So sound is a indicator. As I was walking down here, This morning I thought, I started mind-wandering about this talk, and then I thought, no. And then I heard the gravel under my feet, which I had not noticed moments ago.

[11:37]

And there was something kind of satisfying about that. There was something kind of satisfying about that. And I think, actually there's a, There's a lecture that Suzuki Roshi gave. I don't know that he actually used the word about presence, but being there where he said, do you hear the birds singing? Sometimes when we sit in the zendo at certain times of the year we can hear the frogs and they all go off at the same time and then they stop. But sometimes I'm caught in a story and I don't hear those. those little frogs so the science that is that they found is that people just coming back to that for a minute is that people were substantially less happy when their minds wandered no matter what they were doing so question is how do we stay present and

[12:49]

Is there a value or a function? You know, one of the basis of the Buddha's teaching is to be able to discern what is beneficial and what isn't. But in order to do that, there has to be some intimacy with the moment and with yourself. And what I really appreciate and love about our zazen practice is there's a time in the schedule to show up and sit down and ideally drop body mind and it's a training it's a training and change change begins with a whisper it's a moment You see yourself wandering, and then you come back. It's just like this little sound.

[13:54]

You notice. And then you notice it again, and then you come back. And I'm more than 60 years old, and so I've been doing me for a long time. So probably this whisper is going to go on for a little while. So what is your intention? how do you want to be in this world what is the practice and the the opportunity to stop and to sit is a way of becoming more familiar or intimate and some people have said well you're lucky you get to be in a community where that's happening and it's much harder out in the world which I was listening to someone report to me about that recently and I really started to grok that just a little bit, the depth of how much more difficult it is. However, still we can know, you get up in the morning, everybody gets up in the morning and you step out of bed and you go to wash your face or use the toilet and do you know which foot

[15:10]

you're stepping out with? And are you aware of where you're going and where your center is as you work your way to wash your face? Are you in your feet as you put on your clothes? Do I notice the door knob when I open it Do I slam the door or do I take the time to close the door? There's little ways if you're really interested in such a training for yourself, whether you're in the monastery or in the world. So with assessing what our intention might be, and I think I think what I would say right now, my intention and my wish is how I've said it, is about the transformation of consciousness and what for but to be of benefit.

[16:34]

And I think that most of the people here, if not everyone gathering here, is here because they would like to be of some kind of benefit. And so understanding where we can go off and where we stay on is our own tracking device. So how do you want to track yourself? And part of understanding this is that how our minds work is how the body goes. What is your motivation and how are we acting in the world? Sometimes I read or listen to the news and there's a lot of pain and suffering and there's a lot of violence happening in the world. One thing I could say right now, those of us that are gathered here today, we've got some number of people that aren't there causing trouble right now. We're not making waves.

[17:38]

But how could we be not caught up in the activity and just be carried in the stream of energy and words? How can we stay in touch with our own center so that we're actually doing something helpful, something beneficial? To me, our practice is about staying close. Staying close. And then you notice yourself drifting onto this sit bone. or leaning into something that you can come back. Come back. And we need to recognize what's happening in our minds. And even though we can't control the outcome of things, we do have some influence over our heart and our minds. And that's what I propose. Hmm. that we're studying.

[18:39]

I might use the word cultivating. The Buddha used words like cultivating a lot in the older texts because we had a lot of, that was what people were doing there. It was the farmers and I think that, what do I want to say, those persons that were actually, first being introduced to the Buddhist teaching. It was an agrarian and agricultural situation. So we hear a lot of words that have to do with sowing the seeds of wholesome thoughts, cultivating right action. So this morning I'm saying cultivating without being too attached to it. So, one of the things that we've been studying here, one of the main things in this last practice period we've been studying, is how everything in our lives, everything that happens is our friend.

[19:53]

We could say everything that happens is our path to awakening, everything that happens is our path to enlightenment. There are no mistakes. So if you have an intention, if you're present, and then we say, I have, what's coming to my mind, one Sashin, I had an intention to manifest imperturbable, not my strong suit. But I used that as a mantra. But it gave me an anchor to understand when I was off. And I would remind, remind myself over and over again, imperturbable, unmoving, calm, serene, without telling anybody. And pretty soon, at the end of Sashin, people kept saying, it was so great, you were so calm. Nobody used imperturbable. So how we think and what we do with our mind matters in our body.

[21:01]

So everything we meet, everyone, every situation is our friend. It tells us something about our karma. It tells us something about what our growing edge is. And it takes presence. It takes, according to this study, maybe non-mind wandering, just to use that as a reference point. And it happens It needs to happen over and over and over again. It's the power of repetition. And when we speak to ourselves as a practice, can we speak to ourselves in a kind way? In a way that's encouraging? Because if I can do that with myself, I might be able to do that with you.

[22:08]

Are we harsh? What's happening with the self-talk? I'm guessing a few people here have some self-talk going. So what's happening with your self-talk? And is there some self-talk happening right this minute? I'm just taking an opportunity to find again where are my sit bones? Am I here? Am I here? What's the most important? What's the most important thing? What's the most important thing to you? What brought you here? What do you want to move from here to a supposed there?

[23:11]

Because we're sending you out, or you are being sent out, or you are going out as emissaries. We thank you very much for that. We're training in presence, in kindness. Well, maybe not everybody is. I am and some compassion and some presence and some kindness and it takes over and over again coming back to this one so you might as I was going back just a little bit to this theme about happiness it turns out that the word happy and happen have the same etymological root so when you're with what's happening, according to this study and according to this definition, you might be, find yourself being more happy.

[24:15]

And part of that is having reasonable, maybe I would say having reasonable expectations that not everything is gonna be perfect at every moment. There's gonna be ups and downs. There's going to be too much paprika in the soup, and what are we going to do now? Or too much salt. Or too much spice. Oh, we forgot to cut the potatoes. Now what? Oh no, we didn't. Yes! So, life happens in the middle of our great plans. And it doesn't always work out just the way we planned. So can we ride the waves of that with some kind of presence, equanimity, flow? And I think Brother David Stendelrass, for those of you that know his name, suggests that happiness is connected with being grateful.

[25:26]

And as I... say that now, I'd like to share with you a memory that's coming back that just happened recently. And I didn't ask permission to tell this story, so I hope it's okay. I was having lunch with, or I was at the table with Grace. And so Grace was finishing up her meal. And she was, maybe not all of you know who Grace is, or my reference point, Grace is sitting over here. And so she's, what's the different, I think the proper word now is differently abled, right? So she doesn't have as much flexibility and mobility as I have right now, with my hands, my fingers.

[26:33]

And she was touching a piece of food on the plate and bringing it to her mouth. And with great concentration and actually with great grace, bringing it. And I just, it's still a very powerful image for me. It was just so sweet. And it made me appreciate the work that she's done to get to that point, and that, at this time, I still have this flexibility. So, to be grateful for such a moment, for me, for Grace, and for being able... I'm having a little trouble walking now. but I can still walk. And I notice that, I notice that I'm having to walk more slowly.

[27:42]

And because I'm having to walk more slowly, or I should say it differently, when I'm trying to rush, I have more pain. So it has been a very, it's been a good friend. It's been a gift to say, slow down and just be with each step. At some point when I was being able to skip around, a friend of mine here in this community caught me. I was walking home and he said, stop thinking so much. I mean, I was not talking to myself, but he could see that I was, and I was, I was going over the menu or going around, thinking about what's coming. Anyway, it was just great. So somebody could see it and stop me and say, hey, wake up. So that's one way that we have our good friends here. And so I'm grateful to be able to still walk.

[28:46]

I'm grateful for the pain that reminds me to slow down. Now I see other people walking that have more difficulty and I appreciate and I feel more compassion for other people who are now suffering because of their back. I am surprised at how many people are kind of walking like I do or similarly. So being grateful for what we have while we have it and for the people around us that are supporting us. I,

[29:54]

What's coming to my mind is I would like to speak to the power, using power or practice of zazen, which I haven't used that word so much this morning, thinking about presence, and the power of understanding and knowing our own minds and what we want and where we wanna go. The power of having some clarity and some direction and some alignment with our intention and the gift that we wanna give, the power of generosity. What is it you would like to offer? What is it you'd like to offer? And can you remember? Forgetting is the great demon.

[31:05]

Can you remember? Do you know what it is? And can you remember, especially when there's a lot of turbulence, I can't always remember myself. But I'm willing to be willing to remember. And I'm willing to remember and sometimes I remember. So I'm inviting you to help me remember. I have a good friend right now that's helping me remember to stay hydrated. the water of life. So the power of presence, the power of zazen, the power of meditation, the power of knowing right now, when you get up, which foot you'll be stepping off with.

[32:31]

which foot will cross the threshold. And at this moment, I'm wondering about the power of silence or quiet. What we think, what we do matters And maybe what I would like to do right now is just leave you with five suggestions.

[33:54]

You can come up with your own, but five suggestions to the ways to be present. talked about noticing mind wandering so we set an intention to be present and then track it even without getting the tracking app and then begin mindfulness or something specific, like knowing where my feet are, knowing where my hands are, if I'm sitting, knowing how my posture is, posture, sit bones. What am I tracking? Where's my body? Where am I in time and space? And then what stories are coming up?

[34:57]

What's the story? Today I didn't emphasize so much, don't believe your stories. But at least become familiar with your stories. Know that there's stories and not necessarily the truth. But I propose if you're present enough, you'll hear your story over and over again and in that gap, I think Sazen gives us an opportunity for a gap, a little space, so that you don't have to bond with your story. And I'm just remembering now, we had a resident here. I don't want to do the whole story, but there was a very difficult circumstance he found himself in. And as he was telling me the story, he said, through the practice

[36:03]

There was a 20-second gap where I could stop, see the situation, and make an appropriate response. Because if I didn't, I might be in jail. Just a little stop between the story and believing the story. And it kind of saved his life. So our practice is story, story, stop, pause, recognizing, releasing, coming back. So maybe today you might consider setting an intention or thinking about if you have an intention.

[37:05]

Find something that you might want to do with your physical body and track it for yourself. Because we're going to be in very big holiday mode. There's a lot of synthetic happiness out there. And can we be present for, can we be present for the people around us and for what's happening? So maybe I'm gonna stop with that. And if you have some offerings that you would like to bring or some more pointed questions, I think there's a question and answer after this, is that true?

[38:06]

Yeah. And then some of us can gather here for a while and have a more interactive dialogue about how to proceed from now forward. So we'll see how getting up is going to be for all of us right now. Thank you so much for your attention and your presence. And I don't know what's helpful or not, but sometimes just one word can change a person's life. So if you have one word to offer someone, please do. Thank you so much.

[39:06]

and actualize the practice of giving by offering your financial support. For more information, visit sfcc.org and click Giving. May we fully enjoy the Dharma.

[39:20]

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