When you research for yourself, who you are, asking who you are, through and through, you will realize that there is something which you cannot relate with it. Sometimes it is called the Absolute, sometimes it is called the True Self.

[01:01]

Buddha says, and Dogen says, True Self, what is True Self? The self you can envision or the self you can see is this one, only this one. But when you research yourself through and through, you cannot help realizing that there is something which you cannot reach, you cannot connect with it. Then you always constantly ask, what is True Self? What is Buddha? Then Christianity said, it is God, you should believe in God.

[02:06]

This is true. But even though you realize, you realize that there is something absolute, something absolute. Who are, who are seems to be all powerful, controlling all human beings. But actually it is pretty difficult to connect with it, directly, what it is. It is impossible actually. But the Shakyamuni Buddha and Dogen and many patriarchs mentioned, first of all, to see, to see yourself, who you are.

[03:16]

To see into the reality as it is. In what situation the worldly affairs are, and how, in how, how the human affairs, hmm, rise it, rise it. Then you research the human affairs through and through. By taking off many dresses from yourself, then at last you realize something in front of you,

[04:35]

which is opening, which is opening not only to you, but also to everybody. It is called, it is called anyway moment, or philosophically speaking it is maybe time, subject of time. Or being time, but you don't understand what is being time. Then Christianity says it is God. It is God. But whatever you say, whatever Dogen says, whatever Jesus Christ says, whatever God himself says, believe, please believe in me. Even though Dogen then says, look at yourself, based on the industry, based on the stream of transiency, or in a system of being time.

[05:53]

But you don't understand. But you want to seek. There is only the presence of something which, something which you feel going to, going to, going to, seeing into. What transiency is, what the being time is, what God is, what Buddha is. What ultimate being in human affairs is, something like that. You can make, you can, you can use many words, vocabulary, in order to explain this point. But there is, nevertheless there is something which you cannot contact with it directly.

[07:04]

It is pretty hard. Then, one of the philosophers mentioned, according to his idea, maybe pre-established harmony. The idea of pre-established harmony. He mentioned like this. Let's imagine there are two clocks, two watches. Two watches exist separately, completely, with each other. This watch is this watch. Your watch is your watch.

[08:10]

But, when you ask me what time is it now? Well, now 10.15. Then I will ask you what time is it now? You say, yes, 10.15. Oh, same time. Your watch is right. My watch is correct. You say that. So, different, completely, complete different two things exist separately. And, at the same time, two things, the two things have the same element. One element, the same element. Saying, 10 now is 10.15. Well, from where it comes? Does it come? Then, he says, between the two, complete different things.

[09:28]

There is a person who makes a watch, who makes them, who fixes them. Exists. And makes them harmonious. Harmonious. It is called, what do you call that person? Watchmaker, yes, watchmaker. He says, there is a watchmaker who is always controlling them and makes them harmonious. It is called pre-established harmony. Using the technical words, monad.

[10:30]

Do you know that? Monad. M-O-N-A-D. Monad. Do you understand? Or you don't? Looks like, looks like elemental particles in physics. He used these technical words in philosophy, in terms of philosophical ideas. It is called monad. And the study of monad is monadology. Please look, please check up the word in the dictionary.

[11:38]

Anyway. So, whatever kind of vocabulary you use in order to connect with each other, with different things, in harmony. Monad, the idea of monad, the idea of God, the idea of Buddha, the idea of transiency, the idea of being time. Then you study hard, what is monad? What is monadology? What is God? But suffering, suffering. And sorry for you, suffering always follows you. The reality itself, what you want to seek, you want to contact with this point, is already suffering.

[12:48]

How can you save yourself from this suffering? You can't. Even though you study hard, forever, life after life, you can't. Then, what should I do? What should you do? There is no way to contact with it? Yes, there is. Yes, there is something, some trick, some trick. Then, in Buddhism, in Buddhism, the the Please, Buddhism says, please study, please study and practice yourself under a teacher.

[14:05]

Under a teacher. Okay? Then, the teacher has this trick. How can you, how you can contact with it? Okay? Then from teacher, what should you learn? How should you, how you can learn this crucial point? The The, it says, no, the Buddhism says that you have to learn through rapport between the teacher and disciple. This rapport is not a mysterious way of contacting with a person or a particular person or a particular idea.

[15:16]

I think American people are, people love, love so much, you know, mysterious contact with God, with spiritual beings, more than Japanese. I was really surprised, since when I came to the United States, it's pretty hard for me to take care of those people, you know, who are very interested in mysterious, you know, contact with the God, with spiritual beings. It's pretty hard. Because if you have such an idea, such a way of understanding,

[16:20]

you know, your mind is really stiff. It's pretty hard, even though I hit it, you can't open it, you can't break it, you can't open it. That's why if you want to study Buddhism, please, get rid of any kind of idea, you know. Neither good nor bad. They always tell you, keep away from from God, or monadology, or psychology, philosophy, any kind of idea. Get rid of those. And then, what should you do? This is important. So... But, from the teacher,

[17:23]

you have to learn something through the rapport. Rapport? Rapport. Between the teacher and disciple. But what is rapport? How can you, how can you taste, how can you taste rapport? How can you taste, you know, the ultimate, ultimate contact with with the truth? Through through the way of rapport between the teacher and the disciple. There is a very good, technical, very good word. In Japanese, sotaku doji. Sotaku doji is, sotaku is tapping.

[18:26]

Tapping inside and outside. This is sotaku. Doji is simultaneously. Simultaneously, or concurrence. So, if you want to seek something, first of all, you have to tap. You have to tap from inside. And then, someone or something taps from outside. As if a baby chicken, baby chicken tap from the inside of the shell. And mother's chicken taps constantly, considerably

[19:27]

from the outside of the shell. That time, when baby chicken was born, this is rapport. This is rapport. Not mysterious contact. Okay? This is very real, very real way of practice. This is very real way of understanding. This is very real way of contacting with truth. Then, then, how, how can you, how should you tap from the inside of the shell?

[20:34]

The Dogon says, in the Shobo Genzo, there is, there is a very crucial thing, a crucial attitude of which a man in his in his in his naked nature is inherent in.

[21:38]

Okay? The a man in his naked nature is called Immo-Nin, in Japanese, Immo-Nin. A man as he is, this is called Immo-Nin. And, on the other hand, a thing in its naked nature, or a thing as it is, called Immo-Ji. Ji is a thing. So, I use this technical word, Immo-Ji or Immo-Nin. Nin is a man.

[22:42]

Man, Immo-Nin is a man as he is. Immo-Ji is a thing as it is. Uh, Dogen says, first of all, there is a very important attitude which a man as he is or Immo-Nin is inherent in, inherent in. Uh, you shouldn't be concerned about Immo-Ji, a thing as it is. Okay? This is difficult. I explain. You shouldn't be concerned about a thing as it is. It means

[23:47]

Uh, Uh, let's imagine you have, uh, you eat something. You eat something, you eat various dishes which is, which is served in front of you. Rice, soup, many vegetables, beans. More pickles. Okay? Then, you have to, at any cost, eat. Start to eat. Because start to eat, you have, uh, what you have to first start to eat means what you have to start to accept yourself first before you think of yourself, who I am,

[24:51]

who you are. From where I can, I come. When I was born. Such and such. Okay? So you have to eat first. You have to eat first is you have to accept yourself who is suffering, who is delighted in your delusions. Seeing delusions. Whoever you are, that's okay. Anyway, you have to eat something. So, if you eat something, this is emoji, you know, a thing as it is. See? Nobody helps you. You suffer. You suffer. Then you say, you tell me, I am suffering, please help me. Well, I explain, please believe the God, please believe the Buddha, please practice Zazen. But practice doesn't

[25:53]

contact with you. So, if so, if you open your eyes, what is reality? You know, what is reality in what situation you are? What do you have to accept? To accept yourself is what? What? To accept yourself is to accept you, the you who are delighted in undergoing enlightenment or undergoing delusions or undergoing spiritual contact, mysterious contact with God, with spiritual being or ghost or Casper. Can you explain this point?

[27:03]

It's pretty hard. It's pretty hard. You can't say, you can't say, I accept this point. You can't. Well, you say, yes, I can accept this side. You know, this side is, this side make you happy. This side make you, make you be delighted, make you delightful in watching, watching your enlightenment. Then I ask you, are you sure? Are you happy? You can't. Well, excuse me, sir, but, but, but is questionable. So, please accept yourself is what? To accept yourself is to accept yourself

[28:06]

who has, who has who has who has the tendency, the tendency what you are about to be delighted in watching, or watching the enlightenment or delusion. Both. But anyway, when you, when you see yourself right now, right here, this self is seeking into the truth. This is true. You can find yourself at present, not past, not future, now, here. Who is I? This I is looking at the truth. This is true.

[29:08]

So, if so, this self is important. Then, you have to accept this one. OK? Wherever you are, when you think, when you start to think something, this self change immediately. Your think compel you toward the past, toward the future. Not this thought compel, not, doesn't compel you to stay with the self who is seeking the truth, seeking the truth. The moment when you think of something, the self who is seeking the truth immediately change. So, that's why

[30:08]

I said, Dogen says, don't be concerned about a thing itself, a thing as it is. Means, first, you start to eat. You start to eat. OK? You start to accept yourself. This yourself is what, what you are doing, what you are seeking. OK? This self, you have, this self is important things which you have to accept right now, right here. Then, you shouldn't concerned about emoji, a thing as it is. So, you start to eat from the bean, from the gruel, from the cereal, from the soup,

[31:10]

either way. That's up to you. But when you eat, every time when you eat, your stomach, you feel full. To eat something make you feel comfortable. Make you, make you hungry, make you hungry, feel comfortable, you know. Well, a bunch of rice I eat, mmm, delicious. But your stomach is full. Every time when you eat, but on the other hand, look at your tray. Look at your tray. What? A bunch of rice appears, disappears. That time you

[32:10]

discouraged. What? What's the matter? Where is it going? What's going on? But, Dogen then says, don't be concerned about this reality. OK? You eat something and feel comfortable. And at the same time, something disappears. What you ate, OK? On Earth, you accept yourself who is you accept yourself now and here you are who is seeking for the truth. This self is very important. Then, you accept and then you feel good. But,

[33:11]

look at yourself, well, who I am. I'm not a good man. I'm poor. I'm a poor spirit of a Zen student. But it doesn't doesn't give no help to me. But, Dogen then says, accept the Zen itself. If you want the Zen now and here, accept. Then, accept the Zen. You feel good. But, when you look at the Zen, what? Then, what makes you start to be concerned about? So, Dogen then says, don't shouldn't don't be concerned about things as it is. Okay? If you accept something disappears, this is true.

[34:14]

Okay? And then, if so, You know, it's difficult to translate anyway. Okay. Even though Even though

[35:24]

you you are concerned about a thing a thing as it is, it is it is not necessary to to worry about a thing as it is, because a thing as it is is a thing as it is. Okay? It is not my idea. Dogen's. It means even though

[36:24]

you're concerned you are concerned about the yourself, the moment when you accept and find find something which disappears. You feel better and something disappears. But our delusion always attaches to just one side idea. Even though you eat and food makes your mind feel better comfortable. But nevertheless your delusion always always you know wants the food to stay there. You know, please stay there.

[37:24]

Don't go anywhere. Don't go away. But forgetting yourself what you are doing you know you ate wonderful very delicious please stay there. It's impossible but the delusion do always you know you look beautiful flower how beautiful flower is with attachment this is good you know because beautiful flower make you feel good. But delusion always said oh stay there. Don't fall don't fall. That's impossible but when the autumn comes the flower falls regardless of the ideal whether you feel or not. This is true.

[38:25]

This is a thing as it is. So even though you you are concerned you are concerned about yourself who is seeking for the truth who is who start to eat something and at the same time who realize that something disappeared. Whatever you do whatever you feel whatever you worry about or whatever you are deluded in saying the truth is truth. A thing as it is is a thing as it is. Beautiful flower is beautiful flower.

[39:26]

Spring is spring autumn is autumn. When the time comes autumn comes regardless of the ideal whether you you feel. When the spring comes flower blooms. When the autumn comes flower falls. This is a thing as it is. So whatever you feel you are you are always you are always in the domain of a thing as it is. Okay? In other words when you eat something and you feel better and something what the something disappear on your tray make you pensive.

[40:27]

But make you pensive to make you pensive is absolutely inevitable inevitable turns in order to let food which make you feel better allow exist. Okay? Did you understand this point? Inevitable turns. But your intuition always look at just one side. When I say look at just number one you look at just number one. Ignoring number two three four five six ten. But one what one exist here is

[41:33]

what ten doesn't exist. But what doesn't what ten doesn't exist is really inevitable turn necessary turns in order to let number one exist. Right now right here. So you cannot escape from number one or number ten. I think the other day I mentioned when I was a college student and got the part-time job at the bookstores at the bookmaster store master store master said look at this this direction in front

[42:35]

so I stand up front the entrance was behind me he said look at this this way and take care of guests customers so I look at with sincerity but at that time someone come in enter and say something to me but I didn't I didn't hear the store master says hey take care of him so I take care of him after that he said why didn't you look at the back but I can't it is impossible

[43:36]

can you see the back at the same time seeing the front it's impossible but he said why didn't you look at the back well how should I see both sides simultaneously but he said but I I couldn't answer to this question so I'm sorry then next day I was fired so from this point all of you are fired right after Zazen right after praying God right after chanting right after

[44:36]

praying the Buddha all of you are fired completely with heartlessness yes it is really heartless I didn't understand why at least it was reasonable it was not reasonable incredible but anyway whatever you have to see accept the boss you have to accept the you who is seeking for the truth and on the other hand you have to accept who immediately look at yourself who is seeking the truth

[45:37]

look at who I am and you disguise it makes you pensive it makes you disguise but Dogen Zenji you should both sides you should accept both sides accept Zazen accept chanting sutra accept you who is who is about to chanting sutra who is about to seek truth and at the same time who is about to the you who has lots of delusions so from this point what you shouldn't concerned about

[46:38]

is not merely you shouldn't be concerned about yourself ok you should be concerned about yourself how you should be concerned about yourself you should be concerned about yourself when you accept when you accept yourself When you eat some food, you should eat. How to, how I should eat, in other words, how to face this food, how to face this self who is about to eat. This is anxiety in Buddhism. For instance, you keep, maintain some rice or cereal or vegetables in storage.

[47:47]

You have to keep the food in storage so as not to make them rotten. You have to be concerned about it. Okay, so in Buddhism, you have to keep yourself so as not to make your Buddha mind rotten. This is very important. Even though you have lots of delusions, our practice is not to order you. You should get rid of the delusions. I don't think so. Because even though delusion is a portion of transient component, even though Buddha is a portion of transient component, if so, you should accept, you should take care of

[49:00]

those. So, to keep some food in storage so as not to rotten them, right? Also, then in Buddhism, Dogen Zen says, you shouldn't be surprised. Add to the reality that there is a suchness in the domain of

[50:11]

a thing as it is. It is complicated. For instance, when you do Zazen, your mind is getting calm, getting calm. And, completely, you feel comfortable and better, saying, I'm not touching. I don't touch to anything. I just take care of breathing naturally.

[51:16]

That time, your mind is very calm. Then, you feel comfortable based on the small enlightenment. Based on the enlightenment, but this enlightenment is not the big enlightenment. It's a small enlightenment. But, at that time, you are surprised at this event, at this news, fresh news. Well, at that enlightenment, you are really surprised. And, then, at last, you are completely at a loss what to handle this enlightenment,

[52:20]

handle this uncomfortableness. You don't know that. Well, enlightenment, how can I keep? How can I keep enlightenment without disappearance? Well, what can I do? Well, on the other hand, you realize lots of thoughts running through your head in Zazen. You also are surprised at the news, at this news. How can I, how I can get rid of them? But, Dogen Zen says, don't be surprised at those news. Because, there is those news that there is suchness, there is suchness. In the domain of a thing as it is.

[53:25]

So, delusion is suchness. You can't get rid of the delusion. Many thoughts running into your head in Zazen. You cannot get rid of enlightenment which advances in your thought. You can't. You shouldn't be surprised. What should you do? Then, don't be surprised. Just do Zazen. Continue to do Zazen. Next, he says, Even though there is something which you have to be surprised at new news, fresh news. It is also, no, excuse me.

[54:40]

Even though there is, even though there is, even though there is suspect or wonder, which are suchness, which are suchness. The wonder and suspect are also a thing as it is. Things as they are. Well, this is very important, okay? Then, if you do Zazen, you are surprised, you may be surprised at the news. When you attend Soul of Enlightenment. On the other hand, when you found many thoughts running through your head,

[55:52]

you may be surprised at those fresh news. Then, you always going enlightenment, going to the enlightenment, or going enlightenment, you know. Because you want to keep it as long as you can. Yes, I want. So you rush into the enlightenment, but you can't. It's pretty hard. You find it pretty hard. Then, immediately you turn around and rush into the delusion. Because you can't, you find yourself how difficult you keep the enlightenment as long as you can. It means you turn around, you turn around and rush into the delusion. Then you say, Oh, I am, I am full spirit of Zen Buddhism.

[56:56]

And when you keep the enlightenment even for a moment, you say, Oh, I am good spirit of Zen student. Like this. Like this. But, in which direction you go, you cannot settle on yourself. You cannot feel comfortable. You cannot feel comfortable. So, at last, you are surprised at the news, a new news. Because, you know, you are always wondering. You are always wondering. Well, this is true self, you know.

[58:00]

When you attain enlightenment, this is true self. Or you say this is true self, but you look at the delusion. But you are always looking at both sides. In which direction, in whichever direction you go, you cannot settle on yourself. Because, at last, you have, you are surprised at the news. At news, towards suspect, you know, at the suspect or wonder themselves, you know, themselves. By them, you are affected with. With them, you are always affected.

[59:02]

Did you understand this point? In other words, you are wondering. You are wonder. You, you have, you are wonder, the wonder itself. Wonder itself. Well, you see, you know, the, it means you are here and concentration, when the concentration is good, counting the breath, you know. One, two, three. Then, suddenly you fall into the sleep. But when you, when you find yourself, just before, just before when you fall into sleep,

[60:13]

it looks like, you know, the you whom you cannot judge who you are. Because, at that time, you feel good, you know. Just before, just before, right before you fall into sleep, you are you, you know, you are you. And also, when you, the, just before, just before when you start to count the breath, you know, the, you can't, you can't discriminate this self, you know. Because, at that time, the, you feel, my counting breath is getting on incomplete way, you know.

[61:24]

At that time, you forget the concentration on, you know, counting breath. Just the middle, just the middle. Just the middle, right before you, when you start to do something, you know. You can't see that. And then, at that time, you're surprised, you know. Oh, maybe this is, maybe this is enlightenment. Maybe this is a true self. But, you, this is also a portion of suspect. Because, you cannot get this point. You cannot get this situation of yourself. You can't. So, you, there is nothing but to be just suspect or wonder.

[62:27]

You say, I wonder if it is true. Or not. I think so. Just the middle of things, middle. You can't judge, you can't discriminate. Then, at that time, you have some suspect to this self, who is wondering. Who is wondering if it is true or not. Then, I mentioned, you have suspect. You, you have suspect, suspicion, yeah. You suspect suspicion, you know. You suspect suspicion. This is true. You wonder, wonder itself. See? Concretely speaking, this is true, you know.

[63:32]

Then, Dogen then says, even though you are suspect, even though, even though there is suspicion or wonder, which there is suchness, yeah, okay, those are, those are suspicion or wonder are also of suchness, okay? Suspicion or wonder are position of suchness. Okay? Then, relax. Then, concentrate on the Zen. All you have to do, that's all. So, this is Shikantaza. This is Shikantaza. So, next, Dogen then says, there is, there is suchness. There is suchness, you shouldn't be surprised.

[64:38]

Okay? Yeah, that's right. You have to find this point. There is suchness that you shouldn't be surprised. You shouldn't be delighted in, whatever. You shouldn't be surprised at, whatever. You should keep in mind that there is. Suchness which you shouldn't be surprised. So, it means, what should you do? All you have to do is, just to settle yourself on yourself. This is true. So, we are always telling you, please take care of your life.

[65:42]

This suggestion comes from this point. It's not, it doesn't come from a big mouth. It's not, it doesn't come from Dogen's big mouth, Shakyamuni Buddha's big mouth. It comes from the truth. It doesn't tell you how to, how to face. How to face is this meaning, okay? How to face yourself, how to face your daily life. This is Shikantaza. Shikantaza is always saying, spinning top. So, you have to tap, you have to tap from the inside of the shell, in that way, okay?

[66:55]

Shikantaza, succession of Shikan, succession of the suchness, succession of Shikantaza. That time, your teacher always, succession of suchness. Tapping the outside of the shell. Something happens. Someday. Someday, okay? This someday is very important. Someday is not, doesn't exist apart from your life. Someday doesn't exist after a few seconds. Someday doesn't exist before a few seconds. Someday is here, okay? Someday is the time, what the reality, what the time has come. The time has come.

[67:57]

Someday is, someday. Someday is great opportunity, opening to everybody. Christianity, Buddhism, Buddhist, or anybody. For this, we have to always settle on yourself. And, create your own conditions or circumstances, okay? Within the condition and circumstances, what you create, through the effort, in that way. You can regulate the circumstances and conditions.

[69:03]

When you sit Zazen with dignity like a big mountain. Even a little children look at your figure of Zazen. Maybe, he rush into their home and tell their mother, You become Buddha. This is true. This is true. So, regulate circumstances, regulate your life. It's not order. You should do this, you know. It's not order. You have to find, you have to tapping, you know. You have to tap yourself.

[70:08]

The self, inside of yourself, of your shell. At that time, teacher help you. If you don't tap inside of your shell, nobody help you. Even though, great civilization, development of civilization, help nothing to you. When you tap yourself, when you tap the inside of your shell, there is, you will realize someone to be in front of you, who is about to help you. Okay? At that time, you will find what Buddha is. You will find what the true self is.

[71:11]

It is called rapport between the teacher and disciple. Rapport is not the mystical, mysterious contact between you and spirit being. Okay? This is very real. Rapport is very real. For this, you should always tap the inside of your shell. At that time, you will realize someone who tap outside of your shell. At that time, you will find help. Okay? It doesn't tell you always this point. Even though you find nothing to help you in the Zen, do the Zen. Okay? Do the Zen. Thank you.

[72:14]

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