You got it. Great. Good evening. Welcome. Welcome. Let's sit for a few minutes and we're going to begin looking at Dogen Zenji. In kind of a memorable week, a few days ago, a family member had made the decision to put her much loved dog down.

[06:38]

We sat with her and this wonderfully kind person that came to the house. And so it was so amazing to have that that surround of kindness and patience and skill. going through something so painful for for uh our friend and and then um i hear some good friends of ours uh saga members are having a really hard time with the massive amounts of snow up in the sierras and i you know that has me worrying and um and then this morning after sitting zazen very nicely for a couple of periods we were doing service and one of the students older woman Suddenly was curled up on the floor and we ended up calling an ambulance and she's gone to the hospital. I haven't heard back yet how she's doing, but, you know, one of the students came up to me later and we were talking and I said, you know, I wonder, I've wondered over the years, practicing for what, you know, what are we practicing for?

[07:43]

You know, and this week I was really, it was really clear to me what we practice for, you know. So we can hold others and we can hold ourselves and we can be there. We can be there as witness when there's suffering or joy or celebration. You know, we're really able to be there and to be upright as best we can with things that are happening all over the world in our own families. And so these are, you know, more and more we can see how much suffering there is. We're getting a lot more information all the time about things that are going on. Earthquake and war and crazy stuff that's happening to people. So, yeah, practice for what? That's what we practice for. You know, we're available as best we can. So, yeah, I think that's been what this tradition has represented throughout its history is that monks aren't so busy.

[08:46]

They're not doing other things. You know, they're not... off to work or whatever it is. They didn't do much work. So they were around and they could comfort and offer consolation wherever they went. They were able to provide a kind of solace. I remember hearing way back in the day when Thich Nhat Hanh was teaching how if one monk was in these boats as the Vietnamese were escaping from this horrible war. If there was one monk on an overcrowded boat, that gave them a much better chance of survival because people could stay calm. They could sit quietly in the boat. So maybe that's the best we have to offer at times was just to be calm and to be able to stay awake. I remember my teacher said to me when my dad was dying, he said, I said, what do I do? And he said, stay awake, stay awake. So,

[09:48]

I want to start talking about Dogen Zenji. And it's really, I've just begun to do my own studies, and I'm just like having such a great time because, first of all, there's so much material that's hardly going to run out. Lots of scholarly work, and there's Dogen's work itself, and then there's all the commentaries and the teachings, and everybody's given a talk about Dogen Zenji, and certainly in our Soto Zen lineage. Yeah, it's sweet. It's really nice to be looking at our ancestor, our founding ancestor. So there is a lot to be said, and I'm planning to do that, to say a lot, and hopefully you'll have things to say and maybe do some reading on your own that you'd like to share. So it's maybe a while before we get to the last chapter in the Transmission of Light, the chapter on Dogen's disciple, Goan Eijo. So, yeah. I don't know when that's going to happen, but we are in the second to last chapter of the transmission of light.

[10:50]

So I thought I would begin the discussion of Dogen. As I said, there's lots of material, but I would continue with our looking at the transmission of light and start with that chapter. So it's chapter 52, and it begins with this dialogue, as all of them do, between the teacher and their disciple. This is our lineage. So we started with Shakyamuni Buddha way back when, and then Mahakashapa, his disciple, and the story of their Dharma transmission. You know, each of these stories in the transmission of light is the transmission of the Dharma. The light is the light of the Dharma. This kind of thing that we, so mysterious in many ways, and at the same time, I think we all know it very well. We all know what it is to touch that feeling of the miraculous or the awesome. amazement of being alive you know it's kind of that's the core of the whole of the whole thing that we we are awake and we're just not quite sure what we're seeing you know how to understand what we're seeing um so this chapter begins with uh dogen has gone to china i'm going to say more about that his his childhood and his early education and his

[12:01]

his early discipline and then the decision he made to go to China to look for a real teacher. He wasn't finding what he wanted in Japan. So he took the treacherous voyage to China on a little boat. There's a good story about that too. So he goes and he finally, after many efforts to find teachers, he finally finds Ru Jing, who we studied. The last chapter we looked at was Ru Jing. Very strict. Ru Jing sat. That's what he did his whole teaching career. He was sitting. He did a lot of sitting. Kind of explains a lot about Dogen and his teaching as well. So here's the story. Once during meditation sitting late at night, Ru Jing said to the assembly, Zen study is the shedding of mind and body. Hearing this, suddenly Dogen was greatly enlightened. Zen study is the shedding of mind and body. So Dogen went right up to the abbot's room and lit incense.

[13:04]

Ru Jing asked him, what are you burning incense for? And Dogen said, my body and mind have been shed. Ru Jing said, body and mind shed, shed body and mind. And Dogen said, this is a temporary byway. Don't approve me arbitrarily. He has a pretty high standard for himself and for others. And Rujing says to him, I'm not. And Dogen said, what is that which isn't given arbitrary approval? What is it? Rujing said, shedding body and mind. Dogen bows. Rujing said, the shedding is shed. So at that time, Ru Jing's attendant says, this is no small matter that a foreigner has attained such a state. Ru Jing says, how many times has he been pummeled here? How many times has he hit the cushion?

[14:07]

Has he hit the questions? Has he, since he was a little boy, brought this inquiry into the world? How many times has Dogen been pummeled here? Liberated, dignified, and thunder roars. He's celebrating Dogen's liberation. So I want to walk you through this exchange the way that Reb did with us many years back when we were reading this chapter together. And I wanted to also mention that it reminds me quite a bit of the five ranks. It's not a direct parallel, but there's quite a lot of resonance because the five ranks is basically the same story. We're talking about the relative truth and we're talking about the ultimate truth. And how those two, which are really the only two truths we've got, are in play. At all times, those two truths are in play. So I wanted to just quickly pull up the drawing of the five ranks for those of you who may not remember.

[15:08]

Let's see, where are they? They are. Okay. So here they are, the five ranks. A little handmade drawing I did. So this is Buddha's mind. This is Buddha's mind is the awakened mind is the mind that we all share with Buddha. So in Buddha's mind, you know, the first opening that takes place for those of us who are endeavoring to open our minds and to become aware of something a little greater than ourselves, our self-centeredness, that first opening, the dark, the source of all things becomes available. So there's the dark is on top. It's dominant. And the light of relative truth is underneath. So the top is ultimate truth. And the bottom of the circle is the relative truth. And then the second circle, you have more deepening of the experience. Everything's moving. Nothing's static.

[16:09]

This is not a static experience. It's like something that happened to you in the ocean as you were swimming along. You had some kind of sense that, oh, my God, I'm in the ocean. You know, some great... understanding the context in which you exist, the greatness, the vastness, the dark. So the second one, now you kind of got the dark part. Now you're back in your boat. You better figure out which way you're headed. So you're back in the relative truth. So you understand that in order to exist in this world, we function in the relative world. So you're back in recognizing that the relative truth is the detail of our everyday life. and that that too is full of light is also uh partnered with ultimate truth so that's one is dominant in the first first uh experience and the second is dominant the light is dominant in the second experience and the third experience even though i've drawn it here with the light in the center which is how it's depicted in traditional drawings it's all dark i'm sorry with the dark in the center it's actually an all dark circle number three

[17:15]

And usually that is an experience that a meditator has when they've really spent some time in the cave. You know, if you've been in Sashin, they just did a nine-day Sashin, then a Tassahara. I'm sure those guys got really dark. So you spend time sort of sinking below your usual discursive chattering. The monkey mind is kind of taking a nap. And you're able to experience your life from a more sense of a wholeness or a vastness, spaciousness. And then number four, you've come back into the light of the world and everything is aglow. Like people talk about the little dew drops on the grass, you know, sparkles or the sparkles on the waves of the moonlight on the waves. Everything has got you kind of aware of amazement. It's an amazing world. You've gone through these other stages and now you have access to just how extraordinary it is being alive. And then the last one, number five, is the integration.

[18:17]

The host within the host that Kokyo was talking about this morning. If you were at the Sunday talk, he was talking about this experience of the host, the vastness. And then number five, the guest and the host are now totally integrated. There's no distinction there. There's no ultimate truth or relative truth. They are like a weaving, a finely woven cloth. And you pick up one part of the cloth and the rest of it comes along. So that feeling of integration. So in rank number one, the guest, G, if you recall the term G, that's us within the host, re, the true reality, ultimate truth. So the guest within the host. Number two, the host, true reality, re, within the guest. So true reality is there and present within each and every particle of existence. Number three, arriving within the host through the exploration of ultimate reality. So you're turning toward the dark. Number four, arriving within the guest. thorough exploration of the relative reality.

[19:19]

And number five, the host within the host where harmony has been attained. Okay. Now that's how I took this story about a Dogen. It's like somewhat like this turning. He's doing the same kind of turning with Ru Jing. So this story is an oral. Transmission as opposed to visual like the five ranks, which I find very helpful to have visual Metaphors that are drawn and I find images very easier to understand So this story Dogen and Ru Jing is a narrative and So the terms that are being used in Dogen's enlightenment story are key to Dogen's later teachings. So the first one Xinjian Xinjian Xin is translated as body or heart, heart-mind. My name, Doshin, my last name, I'm Furyu Doshin.

[20:24]

So Shin, my last name, is translated as way-seeking heart or way-seeking mind. So Shin is heart-mind. And Jin is body. So Shin Jin is body-mind. And it's one word. Okay? So Dogen repeatedly teaches that Shin Jin are not separate. Body and mind are not separate. It's just one whole body-mind. Body-mind are non-dual. As though it's just one word, body-mind. Body-mind, xinjin. Because that's important to hold the idea that what Dogen's talking about here and Ru Jing is reflecting for him is the idea that there's no separate thing called my mind and my body. They're like the host within the host. They're woven as one. One whole body, one whole body. body-mind. And then the next term, Datsuraku, he's a Japanese term, Datsuraku, means renunciation or detachment. So this term can refer to the moment of spiritual release or liberation.

[21:29]

Shinjin, body-mind, Datsuraku, released. You know, freed. Freed from the trap of self-belief, of tightness, of my. my problems, my world, my family, my car, my country, all that mind that we do, that self-centeredness. So Datsuraku is the freedom from that self-centeredness. And it suggests, Datsuraku suggests activity. It's something that's actually, like waves in the ocean, it's something that's actually happening. That's not a thing. You're not in a state of mind that's sort of like... frozen like ice nine or something you're just all of a sudden you're frozen this is an activity and at the same time it's an activity it's both passive or effortless and Dogen didn't do anything he wasn't well he was sitting that's pretty doing uh but he didn't do so he didn't do buttons and we know there aren't any buttons for us to push there's not or a wheel for us to turn we're in some sense we're we're we're waiting you know please please come and get me um

[22:40]

So it's both passive or effortless, and at the same time, it's purposeful or determined. I mean, you go to the Zendo on purpose. It's not an accident you find yourself sitting there in the morning. It's something you intend. It's something you decided to do. You have some discipline about that. There's some sort of drive that takes us down there, and it keeps us quiet. So... Dogen is seeming to tell us that it's this continuous expression of zazen activity through the unity of practice and realization. This is what this process is about. Continuous zazen activity through everything you do is basically zazen. He doesn't make zazen something you do down in the zendo on the black cushion. I know sometimes people will say to me, I haven't been sitting zazen. I haven't been in the zendo. I'm so sorry. I'm a terrible student. They say, that has nothing to do with it. You know, you can't get out of your mind. I mean, you can be out of your mind. But you're not escaping from reality because you didn't go to the zendo.

[23:45]

You are right in it. Whatever you're doing, wherever you are, there's a practice field. Practice realization is where you are. Zazen is something that has been created. It's a construct to help us. But it's not determining of your practice. It doesn't mean you're not practicing because you're not sitting in the zendo or sitting anywhere. So the unity of practice and realization is an activity that goes on throughout our lives. So we'll be seeing this reference to Zazen as very much the context as well as the content of reality throughout Dogen's teaching. You know, he talks about in the Genjo Kwan, he talks about in the Fugan Zazengi. He's not tightening down around our experience of awakening. He's opening up. You know, his invitation is to make it bigger. Not smaller. So in the Genjo Kwan, he says this, you know, familiar for some of you. When you see forms or hear sounds fully engaging body and mind.

[24:49]

One word, body-mind. When you see forms or hear sounds fully engaging body-mind, you grasp things directly. So this. You got it. You hear the sound, body-mind. Body-mind sound. Body-mind bird. body, mind, car. It's all happening together, dependently co-arising. Body, mind, and whatever's happening are together, are happening as one thing, one word. And he also says later on in the Genjo Koan, when actualized by myriad things, your body, mind, one word, as well as the bodies and minds, one word, of others drop away. No trace of realization remains, but And this no trace continues endlessly. So we're starting to get into kind of the mysterious realm that Dogen invites us to consider through language. He's a masterful user.

[25:50]

I mean, his language is so evocative of the experiences that we have. We all know. And that's why we resonate with Dogen. Because, you know, I know it, but I can't get a hold of it. He keeps kind of... You know, he brings it in, but then he's like, whoa, it sort of dissolves on contact. You know, he turns things. It's kind of like those five ranks. So I want to just go through these steps that we heard in this introductory paragraph about his conversation, Ru Jing. So there's steps that can be looked at with the turning. So in step one, Ru Jing has said to one of the monks who is sleeping, So this is a little more context. So Dogen is in the Zendo with the other monks. It's evening. And one of the monks is asleep. So Ryujin comes by and kind of says probably rather loudly. To study Zen is to cast off body-mind.

[26:52]

Shinjin Datsuraku. Why are you engaged in single-minded seated slumber rather than single-minded seated meditation? So he's reprimanding this monk. Why are you sitting there sleeping single-mindedly when you could be sitting there awake single-mindedly, you know? So he's prodding. He's poking this young monk. So it's on hearing this reprimand that Dogen has this great awakening. And in Japanese, that's called Daigo. Daigo. Great awakening. Daigo. So that's step one. Dogen hears this Shinjin Datsuraku, and he's like, poof, something happens. Don't know quite what happens. In fact, we don't ever really know what happens because they can't really tell us. Shakyamuni Buddha didn't tell us, and Dogen didn't tell us, and Suzuki Roshi didn't tell us, and nobody tells us what actually happens, but they point to the ways in which, the conditions in which this experience happened for them, all of which are different. One person hears a pebble hitting bamboo, and boom, he has some experience, and someone else drops a cup, and boom.

[28:00]

And there's the experience. And a lot of koans that feature women, interestingly, not surprisingly, however, take place in the kitchen, where they throw the pot over, or they knock the fireplace down, or they do something, they're in the kitchen. So they have this moment of awakening, and they knock over the teapot, or they knock over the soup. So, okay, step one. Shinjin Datsuraku. Step two. When Dogen goes to visit the teacher's room and says to Ru Jing, body mind dropped, has arrived. So there's a little bit more he adds. So he says, Shinjin Datsuraku Rai, R-A-I. Shinjin body mind Datsuraku dropped. Rai, Rai means arrived. So Dogen, so Ru Jing has said this phrase and now Dogen comes in his room and says, this thing you said arrived means I got it. I got it.

[29:00]

And then in step three, Ru Jing responds, body-mind dropped, dropped body-mind. So now we got the phrase repeated, shinjin datsuraku, and reversed, datsuraku shinjin. So something, a pretty big thing is happening right there. So Dogen has said, and echoing Ru Jing's admonition, shinjin datsuraku, now, Ryu Jing now adds, Datsuraku Shinjin. He turns it around. Drop body and mind, body, mind, drop. So something big is going on right there in step three. In step four, Dogen says to his teacher, well, this is a temporary byway. Don't approve of me arbitrarily. And Ryu Jing says, I'm not. And then Dogen says, what is that which isn't given arbitrary approval? You know, just get the heart of this matter. What is that which isn't given arbitrary approval?

[30:03]

So in step five, Ru Jing says, dropping body-mind. Datsuraku Shinjin. Go back to the first statement he made. That does not get arbitrary approval. So, you know, we're kind of back at that first statement. And then in step six, Dogen bows. So what's happening now is he's basically giving a nonverbal acknowledgement of that he's confirmed. Ru Jing has confirmed his understanding and Dogen is acknowledging the confirmation through a nonverbal gesture. Body-mind. Body-mind bows. So this is the form of harmonious body-mind. Body-mind in a gesture that expresses... A practice that has no marks. You can't get a hold of it. You can't get a hold of your okesa. I mean, you can try. Try to get it on. Keep it on.

[31:04]

But basically, it's an expression that has no... You can't grasp it. You can't grasp the meaning of the okesa. You can wear it. You can sew it. You can receive it in an ordination ceremony. But you can't have it. You can't understand it. It's not talking to you. Same thing with bowing and chanting. So all the forms of practice of body-mind are these nonverbal expressions, which are not given arbitrarily approved. They're not arbitrarily approved. By living that life of... In my case, I've chosen monasticism, but it doesn't matter. It doesn't matter how you care for the forms of the practice, how you care for your own objects in your life, how you hold a cup or a bowl or how you treat your friends or how you tidy up your space or whatever it is you do that expresses for you the forms of meeting, body and mind meeting the vastness.

[32:11]

That's right there all the time in each object. The light. The light on leaves. So that's step six is Dogen's silent acknowledgement of this relationship. His understanding of what Ru Jing has said. And Ru Jing's response to what he said and what Dogen's asked. So we're now at step six. And this nonverbal. And then step seven. So this is Ru Jing's final statement to Dogen. He says the shedding, the dropping, is dropped. Datsuraku, datsuraku. Nobody mind there. Just datsuraku, dropping, dropping, dropping. And then Rujing's attendant says to Rujing, after Dogen has left the room, this is no small matter that a foreigner has attained such a state. A little prejudice there. Ru Jing says, how many times has he been pummeled here?

[33:15]

Liberated, dignified, thunder roars. Okay. So the thing that's being talked about here, the body-mind is the person. You know, that each of us is a body-mind, you know. And somebody gave us a name when we were babies. And so we can tell people what our name is, but we can't tell them our person. We can't tell them our body-mind. It's beyond. It's beyond. comprehension why what is this thing that we carry around you know we can't really say it's beyond our comprehension it's inconceivable what it is to be alive to be a body mind just this person you know that's probably as close as we can get just this person so there's that's the the thing that's being talked about the kind of entityness is body mind the action of the entity is That's us, you and me. The action or the function of the person is dropping body-mind, is dropping any concepts, any notions, any biases, prejudices, anything you're carrying as a weight on your life.

[34:27]

Drop it. Drop it. Drop it. And awaken again and again. So drop, drop, drop. Just like in Dogen's poem. He talks about the rain on the roof of Fukakusa Temple. I've recited this poem so many times, I think it's mine now. So he wrote this poem about us. This slowly drifting cloud is pitiful. The dream, the cloud, just imagine yourself with a cloud for a head. Delusion, the cloud represents delusions. It's not so hard for me to imagine that, walking around in a cloud or in the fog. This slowly drifting cloud is pitiful. And what dreamwalkers we humans have become. So he's talking about himself too. He's including himself. He's come out of the cloud. And so he knows how painful it's been for him these many years to be walking around in this slowly drifting cloud of delusion. The slowly drifting cloud is pitiful.

[35:29]

What dreamwalkers we humans have become. Awakened, I hear the one true thing. Black rain on the roof. A Fukakusa temple. Drop, drop, drop, drop. So there's another poem that Dogen wrote that relates directly to his enlightenment story. This one is in the Shobogenzo, Treasury of the... Shobogenzo means that's... Dogen's major work. That's his masterwork, which basically was a collection of his lectures that he gave to his students over many years. And they were collected into a body of work called the Shobo Genzo. So Shobo Genzo means the treasury of the true Dharma eye. The treasury of the true Dharma eye. So this poem goes like this. In the heart of the night, the heart of the night, the moonlight framing a small boat,

[36:29]

drifting, tossed not by the waves nor swayed by the breeze. In the heart of the night, the moonlight framing a small boat drifting, tossed not by the waves nor swayed by the breeze. So, I mean, maybe that's... good enough maybe that's clear enough but i'd go ahead and say some more about that so the drifting boat you know literally is a small boat that has been cast out yeah that's that's us it's this little boat that's been cast out someone someone called mom pushed us out of her body and from that time on we've been working on it you know trying to get it together on our own Learning how to walk and learning how to eat and how to talk and all of these things that we have been, you know, learned and people have tried so hard to help us and teach us. And, you know, we're still trying to learn.

[37:31]

So the drifting boat, a small boat that has been cast out, has been cut off from the harbor. But because so from the unity, so the small boat is sees itself as separate from the ocean. And that's scary. You know, it's like here we are in the middle of the great big scary world. And, you know, we've all made our little nests. We've done our best to construct, you know, I've got a little house right here that covers my head and makes me feel safe. I think when things get scary, like it's happening all over the world, like these earthquakes and all these big snowfalls and everything, that little boat seems even more like in questionable safety becomes a question. So a small boat has been cast out, has been cut off from the harbor. But because it falls within the pervasive light of the moon's glow, it is not lost. It is protected by the compassion of the Buddha, of the Buddha nature. So the moon represents this compassionate witnessing, you know, that is part of who we are, part of what we are, part of where we are.

[38:39]

That something cares deeply for us. And it's us. Oh, I care deeply for you. You care deeply for me. I care deeply for this poor woman who's struggling this morning and my friends in the snow and my sweet little dog that I watched be put down. I care deeply about these things. And so do you all. So that's the moon's glow. So the small boat, all of our little boats are cared for deeply by the glow of the moon. So the single phenomena of a drifting boat that has been cut off, perpetually casting off, casting off, Datsuraku, Datsuraku, at once shares both this inclusive illumination of the moonlight while still partaking of the world in which it has been cast out. So the boat's adrift, but it's also being supported by the water. So it's kind of ironic here.

[39:40]

We have this situation where we're basically a bit lost, kind of lost in space. And at the same time, we're being supported by space. We're being supported by this world that we're a little bit lost in. And at the same time, we walk along, gravity keeps us down, and there's food for us mostly, hopefully. And so there's this ironic combination of being at a loss and also being supported. in ways we can't see. So we're drifting on the water, and yet we're held afloat by the water. Both are true. The boat is no longer at the mercy of the elements, but has become undisturbed by the waves, like those monks, you know, with the refugees. Yup, it's kind of scary out here, but they would inhale and exhale, that I was suggesting to this woman this morning, if she'd just stay with her breathing. And she was able to do that pretty well. She could take deep breaths and, you know, it helped to settle her, to be able to inhale and exhale, to ride the waves, body-mind, body-mind, inhale, exhale.

[40:52]

So the waves symbolize objects of attachment, you know, things that we think are outside of ourselves that we could get, you know, the objects of attachment. They show up on sail, whatever they're calling us. You want one of these? Want a new boat? And so that's what the waves are in this poem. And the breeze symbolizes ignorance and desire. So that ignorance and desire may be familiar. Those are the two causes of suffering in the Four Noble Truths. So the Buddha said there is suffering, Noble Truth number one. And the cause of suffering is ignorance and desire. Wanting things to be different than they are. Ignoring the non-dual nature of reality. Ignoring the moonlight and the true belonging. All of that's ignorance. And desire is wanting proof or evidence for ourselves, for our selfish being, for myself, that I'm protected or I've got safety somehow or, you know, I've got all these things that I use to protect myself against you.

[42:01]

against it, against that which I feel is going to hurt me somehow. So these are the waves and the breeze. So the moonlight symbolizes both an object of longing, the moon seems like it's kind of far away, and a source of comfort during times of turmoil and grief. You know, right now the moon is full. We're going to do the full moon ceremony tomorrow morning. And so this morning I was going down, lots of rain, as you all have, I think many of you who are out here with us in California, lots of rain, lots of snow, amazing, like total opposite of what we've been going through for the last decade or more of drought. Now we've got all this rain. So this morning there was a lot of rain and then all of a sudden the clouds parted and there was the full moon. I was like, oh my goodness, extraordinary. So it symbolizes both an object of longing and a source of comfort during times of turmoil and grief.

[43:02]

And in Buddhist terminology, it's symbolic of the universal manifestations of both compassion, which is comfort, and wisdom, the cutting off or the casting off of delusions. You know, drop it, drop it, drop it. Just this is it. Just this person. Right now, right here. What's happening right now? Stay with that. Inhale and exhale. no matter what else is happening, keep track of your breath. So this process of shedding or molting of useless or unwanted material, you know, like old skin or baby teeth or tears or old sorrows or worn out clothing or worn out ideas and prejudices implies both a continuous as well as a purposeful occurrence. You know, ongoingly, it's not just that there's no, I'm not dropping anything. Dogen saw it drop. He saw whatever came up, whatever wave arises, whatever desire, whatever ignorance comes, goes.

[44:03]

Whatever came up in his mind, as in your minds, goes. What comes up, goes down. Arising and ceasing is one word. Still water. It's just water. It's just reality. Appearing in an upward gesture and an upward gesture. In a friendliness and a not-so-friendliness. Whatever's coming. is basically just arising and ceasing. So the comfort is impermanence, is a comfort, and it's also a wisdom. That whatever it is, nothing lasts. That's good news, you know. And if you try to make it last because you want it, and it won't, then that's pain. So holding on to things causes our suffering. Allowing things to do what they naturally do, You know, like the beautiful sunset naturally goes away. Your wonderful lunch you just ordered, pretty soon you got an empty plate.

[45:06]

I mean, whatever it is that you are attached to or trying to attach to, you can't hold it. You know, my baby's gone. She's going to be 30 this year. You know, it's like, oh my God, where'd my baby go? Anyway, nothing lasts, not anything. Not us, not anything. And there's comfort there if we can see that, the lack of anything that has to be held. We don't have to exercise that holding. So this process of shedding or of molting of useless material, as I said, is both purposeful and continuous, ongoingly. Processes that make way for something new and unencumbered. You drop your body and mind. Something new can happen there, like our original face before our parents were born, as the Zen saying goes. So in his later teachings, Dogen refers us to Zazen. He refers to Zazen when he quotes Rujing.

[46:06]

And he says, to cast off body-mind is to sit in single-minded meditation. So Dogen, you know, he's a professional sitter. I mean, a lot of our teachers in this tradition were monastics. So they're talking to monastics. like this last practice period of Tazahara, I was talking to monks. Monks are people who live in a monastery. Very few of those people are gonna live in monasteries for their entire lives, but they were for 90 days. And so talking to monks who are sitting Zazen, these kinds of teachings make perfect sense. And we have to recognize that that's just a condition under which we can practice. It's very helpful for our practice. But that's not practice. Practice is everyday life. Everyday mind is the way, as Suzuki Rishi said. To cast off body-mind is to sit in single-minded meditation. When practicing zazen single-mindedly, the five desires dissolve and the five defilements are removed.

[47:07]

Zazen in Dogen's teaching is purposeful and all-inclusive. It's in alignment with our true nature, in our Buddha nature. So as with dropping body-mind, zazen is not an automatic or an involuntary act. It doesn't just happen. Oh, my God, I found myself sitting zazen. I was like, surprise. It requires determination and resolve and concentration repeated over and over again. It's an intention. I actually do sit zazen. I've arranged my life so that that's something that happens pretty regularly in my life. It's an intention. It's a resolve. It's a determination. And I need the support of this community to do it. So for all of us to get the support of the Sangha, of each other, to practice, to think about these things. And now and then to sit down quietly and just breathe, just be, just being, watching the waves rise and fall, dropping, dropping, dropping, dropping.

[48:13]

So... There's a professor called Stephen Hine, who I just read an article of his, which I enjoyed very much, talking about this Shinjin Datsuraku. And he says that there are energetic commitments that lie at the heart of all decision-making. That this determination, resolve, and concentration are energetic commitments of our bodies to do certain things. In order to make a decision, that kind of energetic commitment. So whatever it is you're trying to do, you know, I remember thinking years ago, I don't do anything without my feet. You know, if I don't actually walk over to the mailbox with that application for some program that I want to enter, I'm not going to go. It's not going to happen. I don't do anything without my feet, without my body. So my body and acting, it's intentions, it's discipline, it's You know, it's resolved. It's how my life, that's what makes my life happen.

[49:18]

If I don't get off my chair, I don't get on my feet, and I don't move around, well, then it's not much happens. You know, it's a pretty guarantee. Not much will happen there. So body, mind, zazen, as one whole being, zazen, reflecting what Shakyamuni Buddha said at the time of his own enlightenment, his own shedding. When he had that realization at the sight of the morning star, you know, it's like something happened, right? And he said the entire universe in the 10 directions is the true human body. You know, that was his statement of awe. When he realized that that star wasn't outside and that his body wasn't separate, that the universe, he was the universe... looking at itself, reflecting itself. The star is looking back. He's looking out and the star is looking back. So everything is like that.

[50:19]

The mirror, the jewel mirror of Samadhi. And just as the Buddha taught to his young disciples in his first sermon, Ru Jing teaches Dogen, that dropping body-mind does not result in the attainment of some new state of mind, such as enlightenment or Buddhahood. This is a really important point. And I think it's one that's so easy to wish was not so. Because I think the idea that you can get something like enlightenment or Buddhahood is really tempting. That's how we think. We're going to get it. You know, it's on sale. We can own it. We can bring it home. And we can have it. And then everything will be fine. And I talk to a lot of students who have that wish that they can get it. And they don't think they have it. So you can't get. There's nothing to get. That you don't already have. If this isn't it. There isn't. It isn't. It's got to be here. Where you are. In each moment. So the dropping body mind does not result.

[51:20]

It doesn't result in something. It's not a cause. Dropping body mind does not cause a new state of mind. But rather removes ignorance and attachments. It takes away the fog. The cloud. The cloud. You know. Dogen's cloud fell away, and Shakyamuni Buddha's cloud fell away, and they just saw what was there, you know? What we all see, right before our eyes, you know, right in our ears, right up our noses. It's all happening, coming to us, as Dogen says later on. You know, a myriad of things... come forth and realize themselves through you, that's awakening. When you go forth and realize myriad things, that's delusion. You know, I'm going out there and I'm going to get all that stuff is delusion. That all that stuff comes forward and realizes itself through you is awakening. The direction of flow is this way. You know, it's not that way. So, dropping body and mind is removing

[52:24]

Ignorance and attachments, which again are the two primary causes of suffering. Noble truth number one and two. Suffering is caused by ignorance and attachment. Dropping body and mind is the removal of ignorance and attachment. And it's happening. You don't have to do it. It's happening. You just have to trust it. You have to trust the little boat is adrift on the open ocean in the moonlight. And, you know, he said that, you know, we're all, we're just all, he would laugh. He said, we're all just in a little boat and we're sailing out in the ocean, sail out in the ocean and sink, you know, and he'd laugh. He thought that was so funny. Anyway, most of us didn't think that was very funny. That sounded really scary, but that's our situation. We're on these little boats. The nice thing is for me is I think our little boats are traveling together. You know, I do row alone. I walk alone. But I like to be in company. I like to be in the little pod or the little regatta of little boats floating around.

[53:28]

So we can kind of yell out things to each other. How's it going? So that's the compassion side. We do practice together. Sangha, the triple treasure. Shinjin Datsuraku is an act not of maintaining or acquiring, but of letting go. Letting go. And Dr. Hines says that dropping body-mind is not defined in terms of cause and effect, but rather it represents the occasion in which cause and effect merge, that is, dependently arise together. So the way we normally think is that this happens and then that happens. This, that, it's called this, that causality. That's how we tell stories. Once upon a time, this happened, and then later on, that happened. So there's a basis for narrative, which is how humans think. We think in narratives. This, that causality. That's an illusion.

[54:28]

And it's a very useful illusion. It's one that we use to get along. We can't do without it. It's very important. Relative truth. This, that causality is the relative truth. But dropping body and mind is not relative truth. It's ultimate truth. where cause and effect merge. They dependently co-arise. So there's no gap. There's no separation between the cause and the effect. This is a really important understanding that it's hard to remember. It's hard to remember that, but there it is. Yes? Can you say that last part one more time? When you started about cause and effect, when you started talking about the absolute as opposed to the relative. Okay. Yeah. Okay, sure. Let's use the term ultimate.

[55:30]

That's just one I've been trained to think of rather than absolute. Absolute sounds kind of absolute. Ultimate, I'm not quite sure. Not quite as harsh. So we've got re and g. And as I was saying in the five ranks, the last one, which is drop body mind, I would say that's the one that Dogen realized and that was confirmed by his teacher, is when he had merged. Ri and Ji were no longer separate. The light and the dark were no longer two different things. So the way Ji works, relative truth, is basically as a truth that's made out of words and language and meaning. Humans have invented the relative truth. I don't think the little birds are particularly into that. I think they are ultimate truth, and so are we. But we've created for ourselves this complexity of language. So one of the ways that relative truth, if you want to...

[56:33]

Try to understand relative truth, what it's about. It's a lot of it. You could just say it's a lot of it's about language. And as Nagarjuna said, language is the horse you forget you're riding. You know, we forget we're just making up stories. We're just telling stories. For a couple of many months on end, Reb, when we go in to see him, no matter what we brought in there, he'd listen. And then at some point he said, that's just a story. I was like, yeah, but you know what? It's a really important story. It's a story that happened to me. And we'd argue with him. And then he'd go, it's just a story. So training ourselves to recognize that we're telling stories and that that's relative truth. So this merging, this thing that happens for us when we drop the story, you drop the narrative.

[57:33]

is accessing for us the context. Content is the story making, the particularities, the names of objects, all the things we own and care about, and all our friends, all relations. Relative truth is about relationships. The ultimate truth is not about relationships, it's about the entirety of the universe. It doesn't have a name, I mean, we call it the universe, but it really doesn't have a name, it doesn't respond. to being called. It's just reality. So reality is the ultimate truth. So what's happening here is that Dogen and Ru Jing are turning relative. They're using relative words. They're using words, turning words, called turning words, in order to free themselves from turning words. And when Dogen bows, he's basically dropped language. He's dropped trying to understand through language. He just... So what's more?

[58:45]

This is hard. Well, I was this close. Yeah, that's good. That's close. But the words you used, I just need a little bit more. So what you said was body and dropping body and mind. And then it's merging, it's combining body and mind. Well, they've never been separate. The realization of the non-separation of body and mind and of body and mind, including the entire universe, is your true body and mind. There's no separate universe outside of your body-mind. Right, but dropping body and mind is the way that we arrive at, for lack of a better word, that merging, becoming everything. Yes. Yes. You've dropped all the stuff you use to be separate.

[59:47]

My, me, body, mind, my body. I'm thinking. I believe. All of that, you just put it on hold. You just let it go. I don't even put it on hold. Just let it go. It'll be back. Not to worry. It's not like we're going to lose it. We're not going to lose it. the the the this this talent we have for being separate and for seeing things as separate isn't going to change that's not going to go away but we'll have a better understanding of that it's an illusion it's a trick it's not true it's not ultimate truth that you're separate from me it's a trick and the more we hear these teachings about that's just a trick that my senses are playing you know the universe has made this sensory This thing that has sense organs and language. I'm stuck with that. I couldn't get out of that. Somehow my parents made me learn English and all kinds of stuff.

[60:51]

And so I have no choice but to work within the conditioning. Same with all of you. That's what we're working with right now in talking. We're using the relative truth, using the thorn to work toward taking the thorn out. Because the thorn has, you know, it has a piercing side to it. It's weaponized. It's a very terrible thing we do with language. So we're trying to become very soft with what's going through our minds and how we understand ourselves and our place in the world. The more we understand, the more we can make different choices about what to say or what to believe. And which isn't probably not too much. Just how to be helpful. It wasn't a great mystery for me when this woman was having difficulty. It wasn't very mysterious what to do.

[61:52]

I mean, you know, you know what to do. We all know what to do. You show up and ask if they need something. Can I help you? Can I get you something? So, you know, it's really already, we're already there. We just have to trust that. That you know what to do. And... Yeah? Okay? Okay. So, Shin Jin Datsuraku is an act not of maintaining or acquiring, but of letting go. Okay. It's not defined in terms of cause and effect. I sit zazen, I get enlightened. That's cause and effect. That's believing in cause and effect. It's not that. It's actually the occasion in which cause and effect are merged. There's no separate sense of, I got to get something out of this.

[62:55]

You're just sitting there. Just sitting. That's what we call it. Just sitting. Shikantaza. Really? Just sitting? Yeah, just sitting. But I'm not going to try to get anything out of it. Now, you can try. but you're not going to get anything out of it. You know, what could you get out of it? And when you stop trying to get something out of it, then you just sit. And it's rather pleasant. Most of the time I find just sitting, you know, it seems okay. I like being there with all those people. Some of them are doing a little more than just sitting. And they're suffering, struggling, and they're trying to, you know, work it out somehow. And little by little, they begin to find their seats. And it's so pleasant. I watch them kind of, you know, lower their shoulders and relax and sit up a little straighter. And it's like, okay, you got it. You can go now. You don't have to stay here at the Zen Center.

[63:57]

You've found your seat. That's our main product, our main export product. Find your seat. And fine, you're good. Go on. Go away if you want to. If you want to stay, it's okay. But if you don't, you're good. You got it. If you need something's going on in your life, sit down. Calm down. And then you'll know better what to do. So I will open the screen now for all of you. And I just want to say that next week I'm going to talk about Dogen. As I said, Dogen's childhood, his early training that led him to his trip to China and in search of the true Dharma. And then he brought it home. And we very luckily, one of his disciples brought it here to California. Melissa, I see your hand. Hi. Oh, my God, the snow.

[64:57]

You're one of them. Holy moly. So that's down five feet from where it was on Friday, but it just built back up today. It's pretty amazing. Do you have food and everything? Oh, yeah, it's fun. Tahoe's so well set up for this. Okay. Yeah, we're very well set up for this. I don't know about the rest of the communities, but we're doing fine. so i have a question that has come up for me now uh once in your sunday dharma talk and i asked the question and you said bring it to you yeah you're bringing it to you um and it came up a bit up again for me tonight first i'm sorry let me say thank you to you and to the sangha um for your presence um I think I'm having a little bit of a wrestle with Dogen right now, in that I can appreciate the value of accepting what is.

[66:03]

I can appreciate the value of sitting down, quieting the self, coming to a place of calm before making decisions, all of that stuff. And yet, I also feel that I am And increasingly so, finding myself in places where there is some injustice in the room, in the environment, and I am at tension with it. For example, it happens that I am in rooms with older men and there's a male gaze thing going on. I often get talked down to because I'm a woman, even in my professional settings. And, you know, I've been imbibing the teachings of Dr. Tiffany Janna and Cairo Juulingo and Rhonda McGee.

[67:09]

And I find myself at tension with, when do you just put your foot down and say, what is isn't good enough? What is isn't okay. What is needs to be examined. And this is kind of, you know, I know there's no ultimate answer to this question and it's a constant pursuit. But I guess I just was hoping for your wisdom a little bit on this question as a product of the 60s. I'm sure you have lots of good ideas about this. As a female, identified female, I certainly have lots of experience of what you're talking about from where I was very little. and very afraid of it, afraid of that reproductive imperative, which seems to be driving the planet, and that's how we got here. So I do understand, you know, the students here, you know, their hormones are strong, and the eggs are jumping, and there's an imperative. You're supposed to fertilize those eggs.

[68:10]

That's the dynamic on planet Earth, okay, from all species. So I get that. I understand that, and I have some sympathy for that. I do. And as social beings that have been socialized to act strangely around all of that, we have created all kinds of formations and costuming and all kinds of weird stuff that's really, really strange. You know, it's like, really? You know, anyway, I won't go into it. But some of the costuming I just think is like, you're naked. That's a really nice dress, but you can see right through it. You know, and I'm like, I'm just like, okay. I mean, I guess I'm not going to get one of those. I would be very uncomfortable. So I'm trying to understand how people are coping with all of that and how to do that in a Dharma world. Like here, we try to have those conversations, like try to bring up. Here's some dynamics that you may not be noticing. Did you notice that you're doing all the talking? I said to one very sweet young man who came into our group.

[69:10]

We had about eight people. We'd been meeting very nicely together for quite a while. He came in and all of a sudden he's doing all the talking. And I said to him, you know, I don't mean to hurt your feelings, but I'd like you to notice how much of the time you're taking of our group and how much other people are not giving an opportunity to use the time as much as you do. And, you know, I wasn't mean to him, but I was firm. I mean, one of the things I learned as a parent is kind and firm. You be kind and you be firm. I love the child. I love this guy. I love these students. I love most people, actually, unless they really, really do something that's intentionally evil. And then I don't love them so much. Or as my therapist used to say, they need a little extra grace. So I will do my best to be kind and direct. May I give you some feedback?

[70:12]

And another thing I learned that I try to practice is if you want to criticize someone, do it privately. And if you want to praise them, do it publicly. So oftentimes I've asked someone to go outside. Can we go outside for a minute? I'd like to say something to you. Why are you being so hostile to me? When I was the head cook at Tassajara, there was one young man who was really unkind. Every time I said something, he snarked. And I just said to him, what is it? Have I done something? And he said... I don't like taking orders from women. That was good for him, you know. I was like, okay, we're getting out front here. And I said, well, you think I'm a woman? I'm the Tenzo. And you will take instruction from me if you want to be in this kitchen. So, you know, I wasn't afraid of his ignorance. But I was willing to meet it. And, you know, he didn't stay. He actually had some mental problems.

[71:13]

health issues. And oftentimes that's true. You know, when you had extreme forms of hostility, and that was a kind of a crazy thing, he said, you know, this is not someone who's actually very, very balanced. And, and it's, you know, and then we have the privilege of being able to ask them to leave. If they can't harmonize, you know, you may, you probably in a world where you don't get to do that. You have to leave. You can't be the head of this. You know, this law firm anyway, right? So you have to deal in a little different way, but I don't think the rules are so different in terms of kind and firm. I think your integrity is strong, and I think you can say things intelligently that can be understood, and you can make requests. I had another occasion, one more story of this grown man. I was just like Tassajara. I'm leading the practice period. And he's talking to me. And he reaches over and puts his hand on my thigh.

[72:13]

And I said, I don't like that. Would you not do that? And please don't do that to anyone. He was laughing and, you know, telling stories. And we were having a nice visit. But, like, that's a line. There's a boundary there that I need you to understand is not to be crossed. And I feel like you need to know that this is disturbing, you know. I think we've oftentimes, you know, women, men, whoever's children, freeze. They don't know that they can say something. And it's kind of that limbic, you know, the vagus nerve. We turn into turtles and we go inside instead of screaming out or yelling out, no. So I think there are things we need to be trained for as humans. as children and as adults, to be able to... My therapist always said to me, I teach boundaries. I teach boundaries. And he taught me some boundaries because I didn't have any. I was really ill-equipped with boundaries as a young woman.

[73:18]

And I'm pretty good now. So I feel like I got my safety outfit on, you know, got my armor. It's soft. You know, I'm not needing... I don't feel like I need to have strong stuff. But in some places, I think in some cases, you do. You need really strong armor. And there's nothing wrong with that. And you have to check into how you feel after you express yourself. Was that the way you wanted to express yourself? Was that the most effective way? Because if you're unkind, they may just not hear you. Well, boy, she's the word. And then you're dismissed. So that's not helpful. You want to be... listen to you want to be treated with respect so do all of us and we can also support you you know there are other women in the room you can ask for that can we all kind of come to some agreements here while harm is not happening about how we talk to each other about we have community communication agreements at green gold and they're very helpful we read them out before we have meetings

[74:23]

So I think you know all these things and it's a matter of getting, gaining confidence in yourself and also calming down first. Okay. Yes, ma'am. You go girl. Thank you very much. Thank you. Good luck out there. Take care of us. Millicent. Hi, Millicent. Good to see you. Good morning, Fu. Good morning. I know. I know you know. Yes, good afternoon, everybody. Just getting back to the story of the encounter with Ruijing and Dogen, please, Fu. I mean, I need to study it a lot more and...

[75:25]

kind of quietly, but it seems to me that there's a kind of preference in this story for the state of the third rank, of just being in the dark, and that it's kind of preferable that we drop off our relative mind for the darkness to shine. So in this story, is the moment of the merging of a relative and absolute in Dogen's bow? Yeah, go ahead. Sorry, that so many of these enlightenment stories have this terrific... kind of preference for the dark, for realising the dark.

[76:28]

I don't know if this is relevant, but you remember my little insight with the weaving image about the warps and wefts and how the warps run silently and unchanging right through the pictures of our lives. I was telling David Zimmerman about this, and he kind of shot it down because he said, but they're still separate. So, I mean, even the idea of the two truths, I mean, they're still separate, aren't they? Anyway. No, they're not. That's right in your bow. Yeah. The warp and the weft. Are these two hands separate? I hope not. Because I need them to be part of my body.

[77:34]

I need them to be connected. So it looks like it. It looks like you can separate things. But I can't separate this from the context in which it has arisen. I am dependent on the context in which I have arisen for air and food and, you know, life. My life depends on the relative appearing so that I can be in relationship with the things I need for my life. And all of that is right in light, there is darkness. But don't confront it as darkness. You can't see darkness. It's inconceivable. Right. Didn't you say that? Is it the warp that's not visible? Yes. Yeah. So you can't see it. No. But without it, you can't. You don't have this. It's nothing. So it's there. It's required.

[78:35]

You have to have the content text. The whole of the universe is required for you and me to be having this whole conversation. So for us to be doing this, this has to be. Right? We have to assume it. We can't see it. The dark is not visible. But right in light, there is darkness. That's what Dongshan said in his poem, Song of the Jilmer Samadhi. Right in darkness, there's light. Right in light, there's darkness. But don't confront it as darkness. Right in darkness, there's light. But don't see it as light. Light and dark are relative to one another, like the front and back foot in walking. Like the right and left hand in bowing. They're not separate and they have their own unique function. They're not the same and they're not different. The merging of difference and unity. That's the point. They're not the same and they're not different. So it's hard for us to hold that.

[79:35]

Wait a minute. What do you mean they're not different? What do you mean they're not different? Both things are true. Both truths are true. And dependent on one another. No ultimate truth, no relative truth. No relative truth, no ultimate truth. No Buddha, no sentient beings. So it's a familial. It's a union between these two qualities. No light. You don't need dark if you don't have any light. There's no concept of dark without light. Vice versa. No left without right. No me without you. So we depend on the appearance of difference. And then in that interdependence, we can see that we're not separate. We actually require each other. I need you. I can't be here by myself in the dark. And I'm not sure what you said about the preference for dark.

[80:38]

I don't see it like that. I see it as though the fact they're talking is relative truth. He went to see this guy. He went in his room. And he offered incense. And he bowed. And there's all kinds of stuff going on in there. And they're looking at each other. And they're like, hmm, who are you? And who are you? So there's a dance. There's a very active dance between these teachers and their students. And they're playing with language and ideas. And that's what there's... When he puts his whisk in his face, or when he tells him, you know, drop it. Now drop that. So Dogen said... Drop body, mind, and Ru Jing says, drop that. You get stuck with the dark? So he's basically telling him not to get stuck with the ultimate truth. You know, drop it. Drop it. So just dropping. Just keep dropping. And it comes back because grassroots, right? Yes. Up and down.

[81:39]

Yes. Yeah. It only lasts a moment. Now I've got it. Thank you. Thank you. Now you have to keep it well. Don't forget. Okay, Melissa. Wonderful. Alicia. Hi, Sue. How are you? I'm pretty good. Yeah, good to see you. Good to see you, Sangha. Likewise, you too. So I just have like a couple of questions I was wondering about. I'm wondering about why Wu Jing... would use body and mind because even in saying body and mind, it kind of creates a separation because it's just one. It's just a body. That's right. You got it. So it's funny that to me, I have to go through that problem. Okay. I'll accept that. It seems funny. It seems like it's throwing something up that you have to swat away later. Have you ever said my hand? Yeah. I bet you have.

[82:40]

My head? My teeth? Yeah, yeah. My nose? Who's the mind? Where'd that character come from? So it's how we talk. We have created a language of separation. Right. Of ownership. Because that's what came up for me too. Who's shedding body-mind? He didn't say you or I. I shed body. He didn't say they don't fall into that problem. Okay. Body-mind shed. Okay. Body mind dropped. There's this process. There's no agent of process. There's no agent of ownership. There's no agency. Okay. And that's helpful to try when you can to not talk about my hands. Feelings are arising. I'm having a feeling. Feelings are arising. Feelings of irritation are arising or whatever. Isn't that so located? It's more like... I'm acknowledging some quality. Now I said it right there.

[83:41]

I'm acknowledging. See, you fall into it. It's our language. It's our language. Yeah. I try. I split the world through language. And then that helps me to remember, oh, you just did it again. You just started to talk about yourself as separate from your feelings or from your experience. So it is an understanding. It's not like the truth changes, reality changes, and all of a sudden you can't find your way out of the house. You'll be okay. Even if we understand the non-dual nature of reality, we will use the relative truth to continue doing our lives. A little lighter, a little less burdened. I think that's what we're looking for. A little freer. Yeah, a little freer. Exactly. Then lastly, I was thinking about your interactions or docusons with Rev. You were saying, you know, we say, oh, that's your story.

[84:42]

And I've heard people say that, you know, and I thought to myself, oh, that's a story. But then I think about, you know, if we're going to integrate and live in the fifth rank, you know, move through the world, we still have to live in our stories. Yep. So you drop them. And so you're going to create another story anyway, or I mean, you still have to work with your story. Yep. Yep. And, you know, using precepts, those are stories using compassion. That's a story. You know, why? Why compassion? Why not just be mean? Well, I like the story of compassion better than I like the story of why don't we just be mean and get everything we can for ourselves. That story doesn't make me happy. So we want to tell stories that give us joy. I mean, that's really, this practice is to bring joy to humankind. That's what it's for. It says that in the really old text. We're doing this to bring joy to humankind. Okay. Yeah, sorry.

[85:43]

Yeah, no, that's it. It sort of reminds me of what Melissa's saying. Like, you can't live in the third ring. You can't live in the dark because you've got to come out. You've got to come back. The bell rings and you've got to get up. and walk right foot and go do soji and then go have some breakfast and and argue about politics and you know we got to do that we got to do that but we also appreciate people who are able to present a really kind and intelligent argument about any topic you know please help us wise ones Please help us, Dr. King. Please help us, beautiful Gandhi. Please help us, lovely people, you know, spiritual people. Please help us to find a better language to use, you know, that brings closer to peace. Peace on earth. Thank you, Jesus. Thank you, Muhammad. Thank you, Shakyamuni. You know, Dogans. We're trying to find the peacemakers so we can learn their language.

[86:43]

Thank you. And you, Boo. We come to you each Sunday. And how happy am I that you do? Yeah. Thank you. Yeah, thank you. Okay. Hi, Ying. Maybe one more. Hi, I'm sorry. I'm sorry. Hi, Ying. Hi, I'm sorry. Can you hear me? Yes. Yeah, I have some stuff. going outside to wear a mask when there's some working in the background. So good to see you, Fu. Good to see you, too. Thank you. Yeah, I was thinking the drop body and the mind. So I'm truly going to, is that, maybe this is just my mind. Is that really about just dropping the conceptualization? I'm trying to understand the dropping of body and mind because You know, I have all the thinking going on every day. I just, I notice my mind.

[87:46]

It's kind of non-stopping. For me, dropping off the body of mind is just maybe try to not too quickly get into the conceptualization. Well, another approach that is one of the sutras is about watch for the arising of thought. So there's one thing, I mean, it's easier for us to see, I've got some thinking going on and I'm going to drop it. But If you're kind of a little patient to see what's coming into your mind. Zazen is really a nice time to do that. It's like, whoa, that's an odd thing. It just came in. I haven't thought about that for a long time. I've been having really some odd things arising. It's like the thoughts just arise. They're kind of like bubbles. You know, they just come. It's our fascination with them and making patterns out of them and then being activated by them that causes us to get a little bit confused.

[88:47]

Right. So the more you can be familiar with the working of your mind. Oh, that's what it does. It produces these thought bubbles almost all the time, like bubbly water, you know, the corks off just going blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, [...] blah. So, you know, we do want to take a break. And you don't have to drop it. It drops. It's not a matter of doing something. Just notice. Wow. You know, it's helpful getting old. I notice with my friends now, we're going like, what was I talking about? I didn't used to do that. I didn't used to go, I don't know what I was talking about. I was like, and it's for real. I really, it's just gone. I'm like, well, that's interesting. So you're too young. So you don't have that privilege yet of having things just disappear. Oh, I do. Sometimes I do. Do you? Good. I still have that now. Appreciate that. That's a really kind of a gift.

[89:48]

You know, it's like, wow. Yes. You know, a little break in the clouds. And maybe you make those breaks a little longer sometimes. Just like kind of relief. Take some relief from that. You've got to go on thinking. You have lots to do. You're a busy human being. So, of course, you have to think. You have children. You have work. You have all kinds of things. But it's for your sake to allow yourself spaciousness now and then. Time for you. Nobody else can have it. That's what Zaza is really nice. Nobody sits on my cushion but me. Yeah. also the kitchen yeah yeah that's right yeah the kitchen it's really helpful to be there just cooking exactly wonderful there you are that's why the that's why the women when they got enlightened knocked over the soup because they've gone to the kitchen to get a little quiet yes yeah i was thinking about also alicia's question about you know it's all stories right

[90:50]

You know, like one story. I agree. But sometimes my kids, when they get really upset, I try to say, you know, it's a movie you're playing. But then they're still very upset. Yes, I know I'm playing a movie, but it's a movie. I believe it. Like my son will be like, I know. And I say, you know, I feel like, yeah, the experience also matters, right? So it's like, I just try to tell him what you told me. I say, you know, I make movies all the time. I don't think you can stop doing that. No. The only thing you can do is less serious about it. Yeah, gradually he calms down. Yeah. Yeah, that's right. It's really the calming down. A slower movie, a documentary. Yeah. Geese flying in the winter. You want to change the scenery to something that's more comforting for ourselves. You know, we can do that. We have that is the request we make from the world. It's like to find ways in nature. Nature is great to be in nature. And let the wind, I just stopped. I was on my way home this morning. I just stopped in the middle of the road.

[91:52]

The rain had stopped and everything's green right now, which is wonderful. And this big eucalyptus tree, all the leaves were just blowing in the wind. And I was just like, okay. Okay. I give myself to you for a minute. You know, what joy to just stop. and absorb that beauty that's right there, right there for us. Well, not for us, but we're part of that. Yeah. Thank you. Thank you so much. Thanks, everyone. Good to see you. Satish, that will be our last. Satish, you have your hand on too? My camera is not working. Okay. All right. Thank you. Always fun to or interesting to come to your meetings. Welcome back. Welcome back.

[92:52]

And there's a lot discussed today. So if I want to take one or two things to, so to speak, take off the cushion and go practice. One of the things at the core I'm hearing is coming back to the idea of grasping. Trying to grasp and also the Opposite cousin of it. The aversion. Trying to avoid. Either way. It is the idea of grasping. And. It is like. I want to be in the light. Or I want to be in the dark. Or I want to experience more of this. Or that. Or I want to get something. I want to grasp. I want to get something. And I want to hold on to it. It's kind of. What I'm. trying to get absorbed, basically. Yes. Unless you want to elaborate on that.

[93:58]

Well, the one thing I heard you say was I, I, I. I want this, I want that. So that's really the disillusion of the Buddha's realization had to do with there was no such I. That the object, there's objectless awareness, just awareness. It's not yours. It's just awareness. It doesn't hold objects. You can't hold anything with your awareness. You can't possess anything. I mean, your little hands can hold something briefly, like a cheeseburger, but pretty soon it's gone. We don't carry around objects. We don't have possessions, actually. We have storage units, but really we don't have... we can't hold things our minds don't hold things they're more like a transfer agency you know things are passing through and the lighter you are the less you try to imagine that you can actually have something or get rid of something and just i was thinking while you were saying that if you what kind of holding is your breath you know your breath is neutral it just it's happening and

[95:15]

It's not getting rid of or not getting something. And at the same time, in comes the air, out goes the air, in comes the air. So we have an experience all the time of not holding. We don't hold air. But it moves in and out of us. And same thing with thoughts. There's nothing to hold them. You can't. So it's realizing, it's a realization that there's nothing held. That it's liberative. Thanks. I did not realize how much I bought into the idea of I. Yeah. Until you pointed it out. Good. Great. The one last thing is I forgot. That's a good use of I. Yeah, I'm done. Thank you very much. You're welcome. Okay, why don't we all go on the gallery view together and get to see everyone and say goodbye to Sangha.

[96:22]

And you are next Sunday is the 12th. You're going to be doing the class after your big day. Yeah, it wasn't my big day. My big day is Friday. I'm being disposed of. Yeah, get her off the mountain. So I go off the mountain on Friday, and then there's a couple of days. Anyone wants to jump in as the substitute abbot for two days, you're welcome to try. So we have two days with nobody in the seat. And then on Sunday, Jiryu will go up the mountain. And I think it's going to be online. I hope you all check it out. It's quite fascinating. We've been working on this thing. It's a really big ceremony. All kinds of bells and whistles. And it's going to be quite exciting. Can you give us one more thing about the Sangha Week and when it is and how we find out about it? Because I don't see anything on your website about it.

[97:23]

What are my dates? I think it's August. Let me tell you. I can tell you. And I can also ask them to post that. It's the 8th to the... It's not up yet. 8th to what? 13th of August. To the 13th of August. And I will... Thank you for reminding me. I'll ask them if they can put down that there's open space in that. Because some of the sanghas are bringing their own folks because they meet together and they actually have... We're kind of a little bit abstract in terms of our spending time together, but it would be nice if we did get to spend physical time. So anyway, that would be one opportunity at Tassahara in August. And I will ask them to put the dates online. Okay, great. Thanks for asking. Thank you. Fu, this is Marianne. Yes, Marianne. Hi. Hi. I also looked for the links for next Sunday's ceremony, and they were on the website.

[98:28]

They're not up yet. Keep checking. I think the one in the city is at 3 in the afternoon, and then Green Gulch is at 10.30 in the morning, and then the stepping down is at 5 in the evening on Friday. So Friday's at 5, Saturday's at 3, and Sunday's at 10.30. So, yeah. All righty. Lovely to see you all. And take care. Hey, Bill. Kelly, nice to see you. I hope you're well. Yes, we are. Thank you for your teaching, Fu. Good. You're welcome. Nice to see you again. Thank you so much, Fu. It's great to see you, everybody. Thank you, Fu. Thank you. Bye, everyone. Bye-bye. Bye. Bye. Kate and Paul, why don't you hang in there a minute?

[99:38]

I want to see how you're doing up there in your snow globe. God. We're in there. Warm downstairs. Oh, good. You have a warm spot. Yes. It's our upstairs heat that's not working. So we just, it's kind of a blank wall behind us, but it's sort of our guest bedroom. Yeah. Thank you. We stay there. Yeah. I think we stayed there near the gym. Yeah. Yeah. Good. I'm glad it's warm there. Wow. So you guys have plenty of food and... All of that. You have electricity. Yes. That's a big thing. Yes. We're right on the edge. If anything happens, it's challenging. Do you have a wood stove or anything, any other source of heat than electrical? You do? You have a way to heat it? We have a little wood stove. It's not in a good location. It's not easily workable, but in an emergency, we could.

[100:42]

Yeah. Wow. When I was at Tassajara, Karina sent me a sleeping bag liner because my room was not insulated and it was very cold. And I took forever for the fireplace to warm the space. But at night I would get into that sleeping bag. And it was like, I was like, thank God, you know, it was warm. I had a place to be warm, which was really important. So I'm glad you have a warm place. And we do have heavy down comforters and we do have camping sleeping bags too. Great, great. It's really an emergency. And we do have friends we could go to if we need to. Well, there you go. You're welcome here. The roads are not cleared. It is such a weird situation that we can't get to anywhere from here. The roads keep close. The roads keep closing, especially due to blizzard conditions, not completely due to snow cover.

[101:45]

Because if people can't see anything, they can't go anywhere. Yeah, yeah. You have more snow coming too, right? Yes. Fortunately. We think so. We have rain all week. We have like 10-day forecast of rain, and that's coming to you as snow, right? Well, it depends on how warm it is. I'm talking about it raining up to 9,000 feet. But the big announcement today was that Caltrans is getting 20 more pieces of equipment and 25 people here to work 24 hours a day for the next two weeks. Wonderful. The county people have asked, the county Caltrans have asked for help. from outside the area of people who are not impacted and have equipment that they can devote. So this is something that happens in the mutual aid kind of concept. They've actually implemented this.

[102:47]

It just takes a little while for all this stuff to get here, or the emergency to be realized that this is really a problem and we need to do different. And they have to plow their way into you too, right? I mean, it's not like they can just fly in or something. No, they have to drive here from somewhere, yes. And the roads keep getting, you know, covered and have to be recleared and so forth. So our neighborhoods, the town has a huge amount of equipment and the main roads they can keep open. But the neighborhood roads, like where we are, get closed because there's like two feet of snow in them until they make a pass over the hundreds of miles of little roads in town. Okay. And they're doing this constantly. They're working on it 24 hours a day. But when it starts snowing this hard, they don't get here very often until it slows down and there's a space. Then they can catch up and our roads can be passable.

[103:49]

Are you skiing around? Do you go to that extent where you go to snowshoe out or ski out or anything? No. We can get out. We can walk out of the house. It helps to have a shovel. We drive around with a shovel in the back of the car. But the roads, there's so much snow. You've probably seen the pictures from Tahoe. They can't clear the roads full width anymore because the snow banks are so high that they can't blow the snow up over them anymore. So the roads are kind of turning into one lane, which is complicated if you encounter anybody. Oh, my God. It's like driving in Cornwall. It's like driving to Tassajara. Driving to Tassajara. Driving in Cornwall, it's just that you have white hedgerows instead of green. Exactly. Yeah. And no danger of, like, getting stuck in a snowdrift or something.

[104:53]

Yeah. Well, I'm glad you guys are okay and have plenty of provisions, and you're not really in danger. It's just irritating. Well, we're kind of on the edge if more things go wrong. Yeah. We've talked about maybe we need to rain the water, shut down the house, and get out of here. You could get out. If we time it correctly, yes. We would wait until there's a space between the storms and they've... got the roads cleared sufficiently for us to leave, and we can wait for that. We talked to our friends. I was just talking to a person who's been here 50 years, and she's never seen it like this. And we've been here 40 years, and we've never seen it like this. So it's definitely climate change maybe, but it's definitely a new phenomenon that we're dealing with. Wow. The fire and the water.

[105:54]

yes no we got both both of those sticks are hitting us really hard and yeah i've lived my whole life in california and i this is amazing to me and i realized how used to drought i was yeah i mean we just used to go out hiking all the time you're like you know last 10 years you just didn't have to wait to go for a hike but i was like holy cow this is really uh different yeah really different What fascinates, what sort of fascinates me a little bit is this extreme vulnerability. This is not directly to us. The highway going north, which I believe you may have, I'm not sure how you came. It's right next to the highway 395 going north, which is the way we would go to come across the mountains. There is one section that's very close to the Mono Lake itself and it was very complicated to engineer this little piece of road.

[106:58]

There's a steep embankment and the road has ran the lakes on the other side and they've worked on it multiple times over the years and it's been okay but suddenly with all this snow there's an avalanche has come down and it's pulled out all their stabilizing so there's this giant pile of rocks and metal railings, and you can't just go in and dig it with a snowblower. So they're trying to figure out how to clear this. They've got a contractor coming next week to look at it. And interestingly, there's no way around this. There's no road that we can just go out a little bit. It's way into Nevada. And in fact, the roads that... cross are all closed by snow you have to go way back down to bishop way into nevada and then way up north to reno it's like four hours or two a trip to get across the sierra across the sierra if the roads across the sierra are open what about south can you do anything south or that's just not even further google says that that's so they're going north through nevada is nine hours

[108:14]

Google says going south through Bakersfield is 10 hours. Oh, well. And there's kind of a high point there in a town called Tehachapi that also gets enough snow to close that. Like similar to Interstate 80 with all the trucks and things. Yeah, yeah, yeah. A lot of work to try to keep it open and... the trucks start slipping around and they block the road for days or you know hours and uh so it's it's not entirely the road being closed it's the traffic is not careful or isn't able to behave carefully enough to not have accidents they get worse yeah those is the road almost as bad as the snow so the the southern route is has equivalent challenges to the northern route Well, maybe you just stay home and, you know, play Scrabble or whatever you do. What do you do?

[109:15]

Whatever you do. Work on paths. There you go. Yeah. Yeah, there you go. We're still not letting it go, but I think we have to let go of coming to you on the weekend for the ceremonies. You are very looking forward to that. This is an epic year. We can't fight it. You be safe. That would be much more important by far. And it'll be online. So far, our Internet's been stable and our power has been stable. That is so amazing, isn't it? Well, thank God. Thank you very much. Thank you, Jesus. Whoever it is, is keeping us from being completely cut off. Yes. So this is where we're saying sort of. It's really on the edge, you know, that any of the Internet gets out and we're kind of really isolated or power drops out. We're really big trouble.

[110:16]

We're all in this boat together, aren't we? We are. We have built a very leaky boat. We thought it was practically we we sort of thought like the Titanic. It was unsinkable. They did, didn't they? They did. That's how it was advertised. It was modern technology, unsinkable, and they ran into this little problem. They just didn't know how to recognize an iceberg when they saw one. Yeah, they were so confident in the technology that would be okay. I just watched the little clip from Sully, Tom Hanks thing, where they show him landing on the on the river it's like holy moly you know it's amazing and nobody died and he was like he landed that bloody plane on the river and it's like okay some of these pilots have extremely high functioning skill level that's right stories like that that don't get public that happen yeah

[111:32]

The engines conk out and they land in incredibly weird places safely. I know. I know. Well, you know, I was just thinking, too, on the Pan Am flights used to land in Hawaii on the water. They were pontoon, right? That's what they did. They went to Hawaii and they landed on the water. That was a different era where they flew these flying boat planes that if the engines do conk out, they just land in the water and get rescued. Yeah. Get back to that and blimps. Maybe a safer way for us. Modern blimps coming. Modern blimps. All right, my dears, I'm glad you're okay. Yes, thank you for your concern. Definitely. Thank you for this talk. This is really, really fascinating, your presentation on Dogen. I wish I could capture it as fast as you can. I know. I know.

[112:32]

The chapter, just read that first paragraph. That's all it was. I was just doing the, the dance, you know, was like, Oh, that's pretty fun. The puzzle puzzle, but it's a, yeah, it's not too hard to unpack. If you have, if you have the code. Thank you. And thank you. And it's recorded. So we can, we can kind of slow it down. It is still recording. Yes. Yes. And I will. Oh dear.

[113:00]

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