been unsurpassed penetrating and perfect dharma is rarely met with even in a hundred thousand million kalpas having it to see and listen to do remember and accept i vow to taste the truth of the Tathagata's words an unsurpassed penetrating and perfect Dharma is rarely met with even in a hundred thousand million kalpas having it to see and listen to to remember and accept I vow to taste the truth of the Tathagata's words An unsurpassed penetrating and perfect dharma Is rarely met with Even in a hundred thousand million kalpas Having it to see and listen to To remember and accept

[10:21]

I vow to taste the truth of the Tathagata's words. Good morning, and welcome to Green Dragon Temple. My name is Gyokuden Steph Blanc and I'm a resident priest here at Green Gulch and also a mom. Warm wishes to Abbot Juryu who is recovering from illness. And thank you to the Tanto for inviting me. The Tanto is my husband. So today, with your help, my intention is to permeate heaven and earth.

[11:37]

Ready? You are ready. Thank you. Thank you. It begins with a question that was asked during the Q&A the last time I gave you a talk. The question was, What practice advice do you have for those of us not living in a temple? I said a few things in reply, but then I kept thinking about this wonderful question. And I thought I could give another Dharma talk in answer to this question. So here we are. I have lived in the temples of San Francisco Zen Center for almost 20 years. And I feel that I would like to bow in gratitude for the causes and conditions that have supported that. Before that, I lived for four years on the couch of my first Zen Center in Minnesota and or on the couches of Sangha members.

[12:53]

This is what I did to create a residential environment for myself, even though that Zen Center wasn't a residential facility. During that period of couch surfing in the Dharma realm, I had one foot in the monastic world and the other foot galloping in the marketplace. And I have to tell you, I love them both very, very much. In those days, we spoke of two different paths of Zen practice, one we called priest and one we called layperson. The life of a priest, I thought, involved a decisive lifetime vow to live for the benefit of all beings. And it also involved, it appeared, giving up some things, hairstyle, fashion, choice of what

[13:57]

work I do and what food I eat and so on. A lay person I thought of as a practitioner with a life. The life, the person that we could perhaps think about as someone who is deeply committed to practice but also has the freedom to choose the degree of their commitment. and mix that with a blend of their choice of career, family, clothing, and so on. For me, commitment to the temple came with much enthusiasm. I felt clear that I was destined to be a priest. And it was easy to have that vision when I was young, because at that time I didn't have ambitions to have a family. And due to those causes and conditions, including having wonderfully supportive employers, I was able to spend a lot of time sitting in meditation at a young age.

[15:10]

Later, I got to expand my understanding of practice by becoming a mom. Now there's a training. But that will be another Dharma talk. For now, let's just say that the monk and the mother are always sweeping across the dance floor together. The mother knows the boundlessness of the heart. The parent knows the boundlessness of the heart. The monk has learned how to make her lap large enough to hold the universe. And most importantly, both are permeated with practice.

[16:16]

When a staff member leaves Green Gulch, we perform a ceremony. The whole community stands in this room, around the perimeter of the room. You can visualize that. And the person who's taking their leave starts at the altar and then walks around the room bowing to all the people that are standing around the room. They walk the whole perimeter of the room in a bow. And as they approach the rows of people, the row like dominoes bows as they approach. It's kind of a a beautiful visual. And this ceremony captures our hearts frequently because it's the summary of our efforts together. I just thought it's like saying goodbye to my dad whenever I visit him and then leave because

[17:29]

I think we always feel like we don't know if we'll see each other again. So this moment of goodbye is the summary of our. Effort together. And it's very, very tender. So after the person goes through the Zendo in a bow and everybody bows to them. They make their way to the back of the zendo and they stand in the same place they stood when they first entered the temple. And the eno makes a statement on behalf of the whole community. So-and-so now returns to the marketplace with gift-bestowing hands. You go with the gratitude of us all. Clack, clack. The staff member's great efforts within this temple concludes with a clack, clack, finished, farewell, gone.

[18:42]

Our hearts are captured and they really do go with the gratitude of us all. I'm starting to feel gratitude for you now. I have to tell you, it's happening. Or for the chance to speak. Look, we all return to the marketplace. Do you remember Mick, the celebrated baker of Green Gulch? Well, in 2004, he was the director of Green Gulch. He was the director when I first came to make my request to live here at Green Gulch. And he said, okay, but don't plan on living at Green Gulch forever. Nobody stays forever, Green Gulch is not set up for that.

[19:54]

I was a little stunned by the early messaging and yet it was such a gift that he said that to me because this is my understanding. I'm not staying here and you aren't either. Fine, because The point is the gift bestowing hands. Your hands. Can I see your hands for a moment? That's really beautiful. Isn't it interesting that at the temple we invoke gift-bestowing hands when we send our residents back to the marketplace?

[21:01]

Believe it or not, we don't talk much about gift-bestowing hands in our daily practice here within the temple. Maybe we should, but we don't. We reserve that for when we're sending people back to the marketplace. Why would we do that? It's the reverberations. The endless, unknown, unfathomable, illimitable, magnanimous reverberations of our efforts at practice. Which. continue endlessly. When I said those words, I thought of Daigon Luke, a practitioner who lived and practiced with us for many years, who is no longer walking this earth,

[22:23]

but came to me now. And he used to sit right there in the corner seat. Dagon. So these bells that we ring here at the temple are for you. The chants that we do here are for you. therefore your continued practice. Allow the reverberation of the bansho bell and the chanting to enter your cells. Allow it to resonate. This vibration reveals our togetherness. If you live in or visit this valley, You get saturated with certain things. Today it's heat.

[23:27]

I had written here fog, but today it is heat. The resonance of bells, the scent of incense, eucalyptus, also the smells of mold and mice. We have some organic challenges here. Back at home, the smell of your incensed clothing might remind you of Green Gulch, but I really hope that it reminds you of your gift-bestowing hands. Can I see your hands again? Your gift-bestowing hands. Yours. If it fades away, the scent or the memory of practice, you could light a stick of incense at your home. And if you do, here's a tip from the temple.

[24:28]

You have incense, you offer it for something. What is it for? Cam, what is it for? Cam said all beings. Sam is beginning to sew his priest robes. Thank you. I offer this incense in acknowledgement of my connectedness with everything. I offer this moment of silence for peace, and ease of all beings, and especially those that need it most right now. Can you offer incense for your own well-being?

[25:35]

Yes, and we all benefit when you do. Am I separate? you separate do we sometimes feel separate when we feel separate we are at risk of acting out or lashing out at others at others this is how we stir up some really complicated karma the word for this is transgression And the antidote is confession. It might sound like this. Buddhas, I admit that I feel separate.

[26:37]

It actually can help to dramatize it a little bit. Buddhas, I feel separate. It is painful to feel separate. Help me understand that I'm not separate. Please, help me understand that I'm not separate. I do this. Do I do this? Yes. He's Sherman. Maybe we should all create a phrase like this, a calling for help phrase, and memorize it.

[27:40]

Something that you can, like a tool you can pull out when you slip into the pit, the pit of separateness, like a flashlight. So how do we return to practice? Well, you can close your eyes. and open them as Buddha. Close them as a separate self and open them as Buddha. Buddha blinking her eyes. this confusing Buddha blinking her eyes practice is always with you it's not that it's with you it's closer than that you can't see your own eyeball

[29:01]

What does my practice look like when I'm not at Green Dragon Temple? Here's a little cameo. Every week I do a town trip for Green Gulch, the shopping. Imagine me at Safeway. I'm not wearing my priest robes, but I am wearing my Kamala Harris T-shirt. And as I push the cart at Safeway, I am aware that I'm pushing the cart? If I am thinking while I am pushing the cart, where are the vanilla beans I am aware that I'm thinking? All the while I am completely engaged with my action of body, speech, and thought. This is my practice outside the temple. And when I practice like this, all my activity qualifies as practice.

[30:21]

Even residents of Green Gulch might wonder how to practice outside the Zendo. Like, how do I practice when I'm working in the guest house? How do I practice when I'm with my family? Well, here's a universal instruction on how to practice. Find your place where you are. When you find your place where you are, practice begins. It doesn't get any simpler. But what does it mean to find your place where you are? It means opening your heart to where you are, to who you are, and to what is manifesting. It requires a simple willingness, a simple curiosity to meet what is arising.

[31:32]

This can be enthusiastic, it can be tender, but it is respectful. Many times I have thought, but some things are much harder to meet than others. Yes, and strictly speaking, when you are practicing, there is a constancy, there is a power store. that is available for the more difficult situations. And we are free to meet what is arising with our unique and unlimited potential. A whisper in some circumstances, a roar in others. Did she say roar? there a roar in the room is there a whisper is there intimacy

[33:03]

Why did A He Dogen promote finding your place where you are? Because not to do so misses your life. I wrote wastes your life. Now I just said it misses your life. Does that sound a bit harsh, waste your life? Here at Green Dragon Temple, we do have some direct messaging. the Han, the wooden timekeeping device, outside this door, there is a poem that says, great is the matter of birth and death, no forever, gone, gone, awake, awake each one, don't waste your life. I don't hear that chanted at this temple. The person who strikes the Han has the words right before them as they're keeping time for the community.

[34:24]

In my Minnesota Zen temple, a version of this poem was dramatically chanted by the timekeeper during the very last period of the evening. I beg to urge you everyone, life and death is a great matter. All things pass quickly away. Awaken, awaken. Take heed. Make use of this precious life. have what we need to awaken we all have gift bestowing hands nobody needs to hear the end of this talk all the better

[35:53]

So just close your eyes and open them as Buddha. Today I want to leave off with a picture of practice that is radiant, fun-loving, and funny. Is that okay? When people are deeply committed to practice, they learn to be funny in very subtle ways. I love that about Zen. Before I invoke this charming story, I want to encourage a little bit of discipline. I want us to pay attention not just to the darkness of our time, but also to the brightness that is manifesting in the midst in the midst of and despite the darkness.

[36:58]

So while I acknowledge that there's much more going on in our hearts these days than funny, I want us to choose to pay attention to the light. So let's tune into the light. Do you remember Mr. Rogers? It's a beautiful day in the neighborhood, a beautiful day for a neighbor. Won't you be mine? Won't you be mine? Fred Rogers said, when I was a boy and I would see scary things in the news, my mother would say to me, look for the helpers. you'll always find people who are helping. And speaking of helping, this is Ling Zhao's helping.

[38:09]

This story is about a family in our lineage, a family of lay practitioners. They are called the Pong family. In this family, there is a mom, a dad, a daughter, and a son. The stories about them reveal that they are deeply committed to one another, especially in support of awakening. That's what we came together here for today, to support each other's awakening. Yes? So the Pong family is said to have put most of their possessions into a boat, taken the boat out into the middle of a lake, and sunk it. How's that for lay practice?

[39:11]

I can't even imagine most of my possessions fitting into a single boat. The dad is called Le Men Pong, and he appears in many Zen stories as an astute practitioner. I imagine him being called Le Men Pong, in substitute for reverend. Sometimes I keep my eye out for him at Safeway. He has a daughter, Ling Zhao, whose name means shining spirit. She is also an adept and arguably the hero of the Pong family. This father and daughter duo are said to be inseparable. Ling Zhao's helping. Pointer. Such a girl, light on her feet and swift in response. A swifty? Listen carefully, but don't try to understand her meaning.

[40:16]

She simply respects her elder, permeates life, and delights in the power of her gift-bestowing hands. Case. One day, Lehman Pong and his daughter, Ling Zhao, were out selling bamboo baskets. Coming down off a bridge, the Lehman stumbled and fell. When Ling Zhao saw this, she ran to her father's side and threw herself to the ground. What are you doing? cried the Lehman. I saw you fall, so I'm helping. Luckily, no one was looking, replied the layman. Commentary.

[41:18]

Already there is intimacy. This father and daughter are well-possessed of the Bodhisattva vow. And they have a great time. traveling together on the path of practice. Layman Pong stumbles down and falls. Ouch! Ling Zhao dives onto the earth beside him. How surprising! What are you doing? asks the father from the dust. I saw you fall, so I'm helping, daddy. Have you ever had a child bouncing on your back saying, I'm helping. Let me help you leap.

[42:23]

She is right there with him in the dirt, his beloved companion of the way. Is there someone in your life who teases you in a liberating way. Do you have a Dharma companion? The father replies, luckily, no one was looking. He receives his daughter's help with a with wry wit in exchange for the usual embarrassment. A keen practitioner is deeply satisfied to be upstaged. Verse. Paying tribute to the miracle, she plunges to the ground. Her generosity sending resonance through the eons.

[43:31]

Of a vital family humor that permeates heaven and earth. with brightness, as the old fellow said, good thing nobody saw. Great assembly, that's you. The seen and the unseen assembly in our midst. Whether you live in a temple or in the world, please live it up like the Pong family. Permeate your life. Use your gift-bestowing hands. You can do it.

[44:40]

You're doing it. We're doing it. And you go with the gratitude of us all. It's a beautiful day in the neighborhood, a beautiful day for a neighbor. Won't you be mine? Won't you be mine? We have some time allotted for questions, feedback, comments, songs, poems, bestowal of gifts.

[46:13]

Thank you for your talk. You're welcome. I would like the whole room to sing Mr. Rogers theme song. Could I get some help on the theme song? I hadn't thought of that song before the talk that arose for me while sitting here. And I wish I knew the next verse, but maybe somebody does. Request for the neighbor song. It's a beautiful day in the neighborhood A beautiful day for a neighbor Won't you be mine? Won't you be mine? A day in a beautyhood A day in a beauty Won't you be mine? Won't you be mine? I have always wanted to have a neighbor just like you I've always wanted to live in a neighborhood with you.

[47:43]

So let's make the most of this beautiful day. Since we're together, we might as well say, would you be mine? Would you be mine? Won't you be my neighbor? Won't you please? Won't you please? Please won't you be my neighbor? Would anybody like the microphone? Thank you for the beautiful talk. You're welcome. My question was around judgment and

[48:51]

maybe just a desire for thoughts when you're taking the practice into the marketplace or the real world or whatever you want to call it, how often judgment comes up for myself and I'm sure many people of others, of ourselves, and maybe how the monostatic life integrates that more. Maybe that would be a helpful thing to reflect on back for when we leave here. So just maybe how the priest might handle judgment and how to wrestle with it, how to manage it, how to talk to it. Judgment. Good thing nobody's looking, right? Is that not a human experience when you trip and hit the earth? look around and see if anybody saw we are together in the judgment boat we have judgment so how do priests handle judgment welcome welcome judgment welcome I hear you Wow

[50:21]

I know that I don't need to believe what I'm thinking but I welcome what arises so I'm going to say make your your lap wide to receive judgment when it arises and treat it like a child with kindness. No need to tackle it or fight it off. Just welcome. Thank you. Thank you for your talk.

[51:25]

You're welcome. I'd like to just thank you for shining a light on separateness and togetherness. And I just wanna say that you're like a lantern right now. nice to have a focus beyond light and belonging that's I don't have a question if I am like a lantern I am honored to be your lantern and I am grateful for your practice kind of lantern-like yourself to me now.

[52:36]

In the back, I see you. I see your gift bestowing hands way in the back. Hi, thank you. Are we allowed to ask? I don't understand the story. Can you explain it? Can I explain it? You know, it's best explained with poetry. It's best explained with wrestling. But a father and daughter pair who are very, very close and love each other so very much, and they're both practitioners, are walking together. And dad falls down. And what does daughter do in response? The daughter who loves her dad so much and is his companion in practice. She leaps onto the earth beside him. She just demonstrates full, I'm right here with you, and the aspect that's surprising, or it's kind of an odd response, you could think, but it might be liberating.

[53:52]

To respond in a surprising way could be liberating. I mean, at worst, you know, she has some bruises herself because she lunges onto the ground, but she demonstrates that she's right Here, with us, right next to him. And then he's a little shocked. What are you doing? I saw you fall down, so I'm helping. This is a very witty young girl. You have to think of your intimate relationships. And when you did something a little bit funny, to turn the situation. I had a close relationship with my dad through much of my life. And one time he was an auto mechanic. And once I drove to work and my car didn't shut off, the key was stuck in the ignition and the ignition wouldn't turn off.

[54:54]

He was really annoyed to need to come to my workplace and sort of rescue me, you know, as the mechanic and deal with the situation. And that year for Christmas, I gave him the ignition switch, the key that, you know, it was it had to be repaired and it was taken apart. And anyway, that ignition switch made it to him as a Christmas gift. And he hung it on the Christmas tree. That is that is just it's a little odd, right? That is just. It's just an emblem of an intimate relationship. And the father responds in the story. good thing no one was looking and that could mean a variety of things but what I like about it is it points out the judgment that we all share like usually it's just a bit of embarrassment to hit the earth you look around to see but also his witty daughter's done it again he hits the earth that can be unpleasant and then his daughter hits the earth beside him it's fantastic for him but

[55:59]

How does he reveal that it's fantastic for him? He gives a wry reply. Good thing nobody saw that, my daughter upstaging me again after I fell down. That's my take on the story. Is that useful to you at all, or does it still feel like a puzzling story? When you're really paying, when you made your livelihood like paying attention, that's the job of a priest, that's the job of a Zen practitioner, a bodhisattva, is to pay attention to life unfolding. You're not dreaming of something else. You are in your life. You're permeating life right here, right now. It starts to become really alive. It starts to become really playful.

[57:01]

Maybe you can think about how you can play with your own falling down. Would anybody else like the microphone? We still have a little bit of time. Use our hands, Timo. you for your talk you're welcome I'm curious thank you for your smiles in the front row thank you I'm curious I'm a toddler mom and I'm curious as a Zen priest how have you woven Zen practice into motherhood and how is it what is the experience been like for your child or your children so I might have a son watching the Dharma talk from home right now hello Miro Can I see your hands?

[58:13]

Somebody asked me this spring, what has the priest learned from the mother? And what has the mother learned from the priest? I love that question so much that I'm going to try never to answer it, but just carry my heart forever. I love that question because these are the livelihoods of my life. And they are equally wondrous for me in the opportunity of practice realization. So I'm not leaning toward priest. I'm really enjoying being a mom and a mom practitioner. I'm lucky that I was trained in Zen before I had children. Really lucky that way. That was just luck. So that has helped me to be a better mom, I think. How's it for you? You're a mom and a practitioner.

[59:19]

Can we have the microphone again? Do you mind saying something about how it is for you? You're a toddler mom, you said. My sitting sessions are much shorter. But I remember, I think, more easily to pause in the difficult moments and create more space between action and reaction. Well, my sitting periods are much shorter, too. I drive a lot to school and back and to school and back again. So my practice while driving is I'm aware that I'm driving. and I'm doing my driving for the benefit of all beings. I just never take my heart-mind off what I'm doing, which is living my life for the benefit of all beings. Well, that's my vow, okay?

[60:24]

I didn't mean to say I never fall into the hole of separateness, because I do. Okay, and Recently I did, fell into the hole of separateness. About two weeks ago, we had a little ceremony here where some people spread ashes of one of our Sangha members who passed away. And I was teaching a sewing class at the same time that was happening. And it's just, I love teaching sewing class, but I really wanted to spread my friend's ashes. I wanted to participate. So I'm confessing to you now, that this person who lives in a temple felt completely separate. And sort of experienced the hell of us thinking that I'm separate. And what was finally the resolution to that? Well, it's like patience and it's confession.

[61:26]

I feel separate. I feel separate. Meanwhile, I knew that my friend Caroline was kind of just loving the whole scene. Because here my dear friend is, living in me, just helping me to uproot my separateness, helping me to look, helping me to see, helping me to ask for help. And I knew that she was just fine, that I wasn't out there sprinkling ashes, and that instead I was doing Namu Keabutsu stitches in the sewing room, and probably having a little chuckle on the side. Somebody said to me late that day, because I was still confessing. I was still trying to work on this delusion. So I was still saying at dinner, I was struggling today with feeling separate because I didn't get to go to the ashes spreading ceremony.

[62:27]

And then somebody said, it's OK that you weren't at the ashes spreading ceremony. You were more needed in the sewing room. It wouldn't have been OK if you didn't go to the sewing room. miraculously I don't know how these things work miraculously it started to the fog started to clear maybe I just needed my own gift bestowing hands reflected back to me to help me to hold what was arising the delusion of separateness I'm with you, toddler mom. Anybody else? Want to hold the microphone? Here's a little hint. Holding the microphone helps you feel intimate.

[63:29]

Maybe gets the heart beating a little bit. Even my saying that maybe gets your heart beating a little bit. But it's good to feel that. It's good to feel relevant. It's good to feel like you're part of this thing. A question. What advice do you have for somebody whose most important intimate relationship is jeopardy of not continuing. Well, watch me for a moment. You asked me an important question. What advice do I have to someone whose most intimate relationship is in jeopardy of not continuing?

[64:38]

And I exhale deeply and I came into my body It is always about finding your place where you are. It might help to touch the earth. It might help to touch your heart. It helps to keep breathing deeply and gently. and there's the intimacy of a or there's the relationship that's most intimate you know i think of my family and then there's the intimacy of all of us all the time that isn't that will not be broken the intimacy of all of us all the time will not be broken

[65:48]

Last call. I just wanted to try holding the mic and feeling it. Go ahead, thank you. Thank you, I love that. And thank you for your smiles today. Thank you. Thank you for you, and thank you for the center. I appreciate everything here. I really enjoy the way you're holding the mic. Thank you. Maybe a little too rough, no? No, I'm giving it back. Would you like to try it? I'll hold it. Does anybody else like to hold the mic? You don't have to say anything. You can just hold it. It feels good. Yes. It feels good. I'll try to remember that the next time I give a talk, when we invite people to do the Q&A, you can also hold the mic and not say anything. OK, this is going to end somehow.

[67:15]

So how about returning to the marketplace with gift-bestowing hands. Great assembly, you now return to the marketplace with gift-bestowing hands. You go with the gratitude of us all. attention equally extend to every being and place with the true merit of Buddha's way. Beings are numberless. I vow to save them. Delusions are inexhaustible.

[68:22]

I vow to end them. Dharma gates are boundless. I vow to enter them. Buddha's way is unsurpassable. I vow to become it. Beings are numberless. Dharma gates are boundless, I bow to adjourn. For those ways unsurpassable, I bow to commit. Things are numberless, I bow to save them.

[69:27]

I vow to end them. God, my deeds are boundless. I vow to end them. God, my deeds are boundless. I vow to end them. God, my deeds are boundless. I vow to end them. I vow to end them.

[69:52]

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