This podcast is offered by the San Francisco Zen Center on the web at sfzc.org. Our public programs are made possible by donations from people like you. Good morning, everyone. It's great to have you here. It's great to see you. It's great to Host and have you all come to this temple this morning. My name is Sozon Michael McCord and I'm an administrator. Died. Well, there it is again. Came back. We'll see if there's any ghost in the machine this morning. If so, we'll just have another adventure, won't we? So. Thank you.

[01:28]

All right, let's see what happens next. Have you ever heard in practice, in Zen practice, Buddhist practice, be in the moment? And have you ever tried to be in the moment and had it not work? And you thought, if there was just some tip or trick or thing that I could do, I mean, if you're going to kayak or water ski or play the violin, they usually tell you there's a few things you can do. Do these things. And then it makes it easier for you to learn how to play the violin. It makes it easier for you to water ski. But have you ever tried for years to try to, like, how do I be in the moment? And then you find yourself in that same sort of situation, just like it is when... At the end of a busy day when you plop down and you start to read your book and you're three pages in and you don't know what you just read because you're not at your book. That phenomenon is something that we've all noticed before. And the question that comes up, of course, is, is there some sort of scaffolding that could help me do the work?

[02:33]

Is there some sort of scaffolding that could help me do the work so that I can be in the moment because I bought into this being in the moment thing, but it doesn't seem to always happen. get to that in a second. So there was this tradition, still exists in some parts of the world, certainly in India, of the funeral pyre. Now the funeral pyre is when someone who has passed, someone who has died, a loved one, a fellow member of the Sangha, a mother, a daughter, someone that we love has died and we put them on a big pile of wood. And we wrap them up very ornately. And then we sit in meditation while that wood catches fire and while the body slowly burns into nothing but ash. Now, this could seem like a fairly morbid tradition, but

[03:38]

look at it in another way, being looked at in another way, and the reason that it was done, especially from the monastic tradition of sitting at the funeral pyre in meditation for six to eight hours while the body completely becomes ash. It's not out of morbidity, but it is out of realizing the temporariness of this life, how quickly it passes away, how just before our eyes, this loved one is now ash. And hopefully that will inspire, that will be digested so that when I go and meet the next person, I realize I don't want to skip through you. When I go back and see my mom or my dad or my friend, I don't want to be skipping through this moment because I wanted to go do that thing or watch that show or do my workout or do the thing. But wait a second.

[04:39]

There's this person. there's this relationship. And it can pass away like that. Scaffolding to do the work. The funeral pyre. Being appreciative of what's there. Because Zen celebrates the mundane. It takes the black and white reel of everyday life and lets it, technicolor, get splashed across it. When there is... attention being paid to being in this moment whether it be a fun moment a not so fun moment or just be washing the dishes or waiting for that person that's not here and being able to be alive in that moment as opposed to skipping through it okay when's that thing going to come up that I really want to pay attention to Zen celebrates the mundane Zhou Shu, or in Chinese, say Xiao, from the Book of Serenity in Case 39, this comes from China, in the Golden Age of Zen, roughly the 700s in China.

[06:00]

And Zhou Shu was this monk that a lot of people wrote a lot of things down about because he had a lot of insight, and especially a lot of very quick insight, small insight, where someone says something, you know, and then you think about it and go, wait a second, was that the koan? Was that the lesson? So, Joshu is this monk in a monastery. People want to come and practice with Joshu. And a monk arrives who's wanted to practice there for some time, and they've been there for a while, they've done some things, and finally they get to talk to Joshu. And they say, I've just entered the monastery, please give me some guidance. Kind of going to the guru on the mountain. What are they going to say? And Joshu says, have you had breakfast yet? And the monk says, yes, I've eaten. And Joshua continues and says, then go wash your bowl. And that's it. The very first lesson in the monastery was do the next thing.

[07:09]

And not just do the next thing and skip through it, but do the next thing as though it's the most important thing on the planet for you to be doing because that's what you're going to do. You're only going to do this one thing. And the lesson was, you're here talking to me. That's great. It might seem like it's a big moment, but what's the moment really asking for, young monk? It's asking for the next thing. Go wash your bowl. And so I think of the folks that... I've known here before at Zen Center that have been influential to me. And sometimes when I notice that I'm skipping through a day, or skipping through a moment, or trying to do something hurriedly, I realize that there's this long connection that I'm attached to. And there's all these people that built these different monasteries, that built Green Gulch, that sat in this very Zendo, who are not with us anymore. And using the memory, the lessons, the things that they taught us, our connectedness to that tradition, as a way for me to be with my bowl, my bedspread.

[08:23]

That boring conversation that you want to get out of, but you kind of know you have to have. The mundane. And getting used to celebrating it and letting it catch on fire. Right next door to me for several years, a monk named Jeffrey lived. And Jeffrey died back in February. And Jeffrey used to be someone that would go around and really celebrate the little tiny things in life. And he liked to, when he was walking around San Francisco, he liked to notice when there was a penny on the ground, and he would always pick up the penny. Now, I don't know how long it's been since you picked up pennies, but most of us quit picking up pennies a long time ago because they just kind of weren't worth it, you know. If time is money, then I just spent 10 cents to pick up that penny, you know, that kind of mentality. Jeffrey would always pick up pennies, and he would bring the pennies home, and he would collect them until you had 100 pennies. Because you might know this old saying of, you know, you pick up a penny, it's good luck.

[09:26]

You know, there's good luck lying on the ground, so here's a lucky penny. So Jeffrey would take these lucky pennies, and he would stick them in a box, and when he got 100 of those lucky pennies, he would put them together in a box. And then he would spend several hours making this box very ornate, and he would wrap it up, and then he would seal it, and then he would make it into like this little shaker. This is one of Jeffrey's boxes that Jeffrey gave me. And he said that if you shake it once, he said it's got 100 shakes in it. So if you shake it once, that's good luck. So there's some good luck for our talk. And this was from Jeffrey. And this probably symbolizes two years of him walking around San Francisco. And at least three to six hours of him doing artwork in his apartment. And I have this on my shelf. And sometimes when I'm in a rush to leave the house, I just pick it up and look at it and maybe shake it.

[10:29]

And remember... that people are not going to necessarily remember much in 100 years about me and what I did. But the next person that I run into, I can give them my full attention like it's the most important thing on the planet. Because Zen is teaching me and asking me to be right here, right now. Because 100 years from now, my car, my clothes, my apartment, my art... all the stuff that I think is really important that I stuck in boxes, the things I have on my shelf. In 21, 24, at the very most, I might be a picture on someone's shelf, but probably not. And all those little petty worries that I had and those things that I had to get done, those things won't necessarily be anything more than dust. And what will I have liked to have spent my time doing? Accomplishing things, getting something for myself, the pettiness, the spark from the Flintstone.

[11:40]

What is it that I will be chasing now that is so incredibly irrelevant? Because all there is, is right now. And how can I remember that so that I treasure the people that are in front of me? So I don't forget the beauty. and the things that they taught me, and how to be with the little tiny moments and to treasure them, and then to pass on something that will be at least a memory for the people who knew me. And if you see me in a photograph after I've died, I'm looking back at you and saying, go out there and connect to the next person. You're alive. These are the things that are the scaffolding to do the work for us to help us remember how to be in this moment now and to not be caught up with our petty jealousies and trying to gain.

[12:43]

But the next person, the barista, the bus driver, the waiter, the customer service person who can't understand what you're trying to tell them about returning your four pairs of socks and how you already paid. And then you get wound about this person that's probably getting paid minimum wage or less, that's answering the phone, and you're probably the 50th person that was upset with them today. What brings you back? What brings me back to the spaciousness of the moment and what it is actually asking for? What is the moment asking for? What keeps me from being in this stance, a host stance, an open-hearted stance? When I get in this stance, when I'm down and in kind of like my triangle-focused accomplishment mode, what helps me open? What helps me hear? We have a lot of people who went to Enzo Village over this last year.

[13:50]

Enzo Village is a retirement community that San Francisco Zen Center put together over the last decade, and it opened up at the end of last year. And several of the teachers who lived here for years went and moved there. And their legacy is here. And what they taught us is here. And you can see it in so many different places. And you can touch it. And you can use it as a way to help you remember. But because this is not a mausoleum, the purpose is for us to actually be able to meet the next person. To be able to meet you. And to welcome you here into Green Gulch and to say we're really happy that you're here. The people that are here at the temple today, you are Zen Center. And the people that are at City Center and the people that are at Tassahara, that is Zen Center. It's the beating heart of now that is alive, that is Zen Center. And we take the beauty and the memories and the hard work and all of the things that the people did in the past and we use it for scaffolding.

[14:59]

not so that we can worship the past but so that we can take those lessons and help it fire us like our funeral pyre so that we can be in this moment with the next person or with that very boring dish that we have to wash with the mundane and we realize that all of those moments are right here as I'm making my bed and am I going to skip through making my bed or am I going to be right there with my pillowcase right there with my sheet, and my comforter. And not skipping through, but making a meditation. First thing in the morning when I get out of bed, having my bed be my teacher and remembrance that this is a mundane thing to skip through. Don't skip through your bed. You're going to meet a person or two today that you want to skip through. Give them your full attention. There's going to be plenty of... moments and activities that feel like they really aren't my life.

[16:00]

I'm going to get back to my life. My life is the fun stuff, the exciting stuff. And then all the other things, the 95% in between, that's just getting back to my life. Well, no, that is your life. That is my life. And the request is to learn how to be there through all of it, like it was the most important thing. For years, I worked... At Tassajara, lived there, was an administrator, was a young monk working in the dish shack, doing all sorts of things. And I spent two years as the Tenzo at Tassajara. The Tenzo is the one who guides the kitchen in monastic practice and works with all of the food and how it is that we use Zen practice and infuse it into these offerings that we bring out and give to the Sangha. And there was a person that I worked with there when we were a guest cook together in the summer of 2011. And her name was Juliet Wagner. And Juliet was a really unique monk. And I'll never forget the lessons that she taught me.

[17:02]

Juliet was a person that had the word grace. She just seemed graceful. Now, if you've ever been in the Tassajara kitchen in the summer... You know that it's over many days, over 100 degrees. You've got a few dozen people coming in and coming out. You're trying to feed at that time 150 people in two different dining rooms. And it's really easy to be frazzled, to just put on like your worst T-shirt and to try to cover your head and stay cool. And you're sweating all the time and you're rushing around. You're trying to be, you know, nice to everybody, but it can be a little difficult, you know, all the stuff you've got to get done. And Juliet. She always looked so put together. She would kind of dress up for the kitchen, you know. And it'd be 105 in there, and we'd be making falafel with boiling oil in front of us, you know. And then I'd be there in my T-shirt, and Juliet would have, like, her bandana tied just so, you know. She had this ability to go to the Goodwill at Tassajara and to just find, like, random things and put them together, and they would look great, you know.

[18:07]

And she was an artist. She went to art school. And I'll just never forget the grace of Juliet. In that kitchen. And how I was like, it doesn't necessarily have to be frazzled. It doesn't necessarily have to be a little desperate. It doesn't necessarily have to be what have you. A few months ago, Juliet, who's my same age, died. A very tragic death of bone cancer. And I went into the kitchen and I found her cut sheet. Her very first cut sheet that she ever did. And that's the cut sheet where you tell everybody else what you... once for your meal, if you're the chef, and how you chop this, how you cut this, how you do that, whatever. And yeah, I scanned it so that there would be a legacy, scanned all of that stuff, actually. But the actual cut sheet, which is not the one that's in my hand, I actually sent that to her mother. But she made blueberry pancakes that morning, and she made...

[19:09]

She made steel-cut oats, and she had fruit that was cut just so. And I can still see Juliet writing those cut sheets up in that loft. We used to work in the attic of the kitchen, so it's even hotter up there. And she was thinking of that offering and what she was going to give people. I had a lot of mundane times with Juliet and Jeffrey. Times that we kind of skipped through. But I want to use their lesson, and I do use their lesson, to remember to be here now and to treasure those people that are in front of me today, that are alive today. Because I don't remember why I was so upset a year ago.

[20:15]

I mean, there's always some little petty thing you're upset about, right? I mean, you might remember a few things over the course of your lifetime that you're upset about, but most of the stuff kind of passes through. And I'm like, wait a second. Maybe this can be some of the scaffolding to get perspective on this. Whenever I'm here, I love to stop over in the tea garden and the tea house that Sensei Mea Winder put together, the Sewing the Moon tea house. And I love to sit in the courtyard. And just all the care and attention that went to where those stones came from and how they were laid. I loved it when I go in my jog when I'm here to run out to the ocean and back and I pass by the farm and all the people. And my late teacher, Steve Stuckey, who spent so much time on that farm in the 70s. And Emila Heller, who's now up at Enzo Village. And Sarah Tashkir and all the people that helped build that farm. And the fact that I come from farmers. And my father was the first person to leave the McCord farm.

[21:17]

And there were seven generations before him in Indiana on that farm. And all the time and labor they put into growing things and to looking at the weather and to the small bugs. And is this actually going to last until harvest? And those cycles. And to not be on such a rush to my run to the ocean to get back so that I can have my coffee, so that I can then do my email, so that I can get to work circles, so that I can go meet with that person, so that I, you know, to just notice the farm and to think about the legacy of what's there. We can use the past to revere what was there so that it can be the scaffolding for now. Every morning we chant our lineage and we do bows in the Kaisando to Suzuki Roshi and to the ancestors. And it's not just a ritual that we have to go through, but it's connecting us to our past.

[22:21]

If you go and you read the lamp that was shown across all those generations and you read about them, Do you realize all the practice that was put together so that we could actually have this Zen practice? It's hundreds of years of people being together as a sangha, sharpening each other and sharing those lessons. For what reason? For now. If you are here now, you are Zen Center. Right now, here today, you are in this seat. You are Zen Center. Zen Center is the beating heart of whoever is here today. Arthur Miller is a playwright that I've always really respected and loved. And Arthur Miller was married for most of his life to one woman. And I was always caught by this. And of course, when you have a playwright, they can usually succinctly put something that is memorable. And on the passing of his wife, Arthur Miller wrote, I am very old now.

[23:29]

Like a dog, I always laid my catch at her feet. Now I carry it around aimlessly, the happy game disrupted forever. That was his funeral pyre. It sounds somber and sad, but what it is is it's a remembrance of the beauty of what he had, and the next person, the barista that he meets, the person on the street, oh yeah, I don't want to skip through that. It's beautiful to have people in your life. It's beautiful not to skip through things. We are in a world that has so much disrespect. Disrespect for each other. Disrespect for this moment. Trying to get through this moment. Living life like we're holding our breath so that one day I will get to the place where I can exhale. And as we know, we never get to the place where you exhale. It just keeps being one thing after another.

[24:30]

You just, you know, it's like, I'm not living my life yet. I'm in high school, but I want to get into a really good college. Get into a really good college. Yeah, but I really got to get a really good internship and I have to really get good grades. I'm not living my life yet. Then you get out and you get the internship, you get the job, but I'm just a young person in the job. No one really respects me yet. I've really got to work hard so that I can get promoted. I want to get married. I want to date. Then you date, you get married, you get a little bit better job, but I got to have kids, but I got to have a 401k, but I have to save money to buy a house. This story never ends. And eventually I'm still holding my breath, trying to see if I have a better walker than the person next to me in the retirement center. And I'm 91. And mine still has tennis balls on the bottom. And Ron's doesn't. It's a never-ending story to constantly be chasing.

[25:31]

What is it that helps you? What is it that helps me be here right now, in this moment? Because the world is teaching us and wanting us more and more and more. And it's so much more important for Zen to be in the world every day, in the spaces where people work, where they commute, where they interact, because we're constantly being asked to do the next thing, the next thing. We have that next button. We always click. I want to see something next. I want to get to the next screen. I want to do something next. And I'm not even aware of my body right now. I'm not even aware of my mind. I'm not even aware of my breath. I'm not even aware that my pupils might be dilated. I might not be aware that my neck is forward and it has been looking at that screen like a moth for the last two hours and my neck actually hurts. What is it that helps you do the work? What is the scaffolding that brings you back to this moment? In the Fukanza Zengi, which is a document written by the founder of this school of Zen, or you could say the re-founder of this school, Ehei Dogen.

[26:45]

And he was in the 13th century in Japan. He went back to China to kind of relearn what maybe they had missed or lost in some of the translation from the Chinese that had come over and brought Zen, Chan Buddhism to Japan. He goes back to China. He spends three years there. And before he even gets off his boat, he writes this document called the Fukan Zazengi, the universal call to sitting. And he wanted to share this with everyone about Shikantaza, about how to just sit, about how to just be. And in there, there is this statement that I love about being here now, because that's what we practice in the morning when we come here and we practice Zazen. We're practicing being a human being. There's a place to practice basketball. There's a place to practice opera. Well, this is a place to practice being a human being. Being here now. You're sitting zazen. Be here now. Over and over again. Be here now. Complete acceptance with whatever arises. Be here now.

[27:46]

And he writes this document, and he writes, Who would take wasteful delight from the spark from the Flintstone? You have gained the pivotal opportunity of human form. Do not use your time in vain. You are maintaining the essential working of the Buddha way. Who would take the wasteful delight in the spark from the flint stone? You know, when you have the flint stone and you're trying to, you know, if you've ever done camping, you get the flint stone. This is like real old world camping. Now we should bring a lighter. But like, you know, you get the flint out there and you get these little sparks that are coming off. Now, eventually you're going to have fire. Eventually you're going to have fire. But these little sparks with the heat between the Flintstones being rubbed together in that friction. Now, eventually you're going to have fire. That's what you really want, right? And if you know that fire is what comes, then you're not going to just take wasteful delight in the spark. Oh, I had a spark. Yay. No, no, no. You're not done. Keep going.

[28:48]

That's not the thing. But it's the little tiny distractions that we end up chasing. We end up chasing all these little tiny distractions, these pettinesses, these jealousies, these acquisitions, this greed, this whatever, this insecurity, chasing the little tiny sparks of life all over the place, but not really persisting and being settled and realizing, actually, what we're waiting for is fire. We actually want this to catch on fire. We want this moment to catch on fire. It's not about the little sparks. the little things that I could be chasing this afternoon, the show on Netflix, the thing that I might, whether I could have that sandwich back at that shop I like in San Francisco. Those things, there's nothing wrong with those things. And I'm not saying that those things are awful. And when it's cookie time and you have a cookie, totally enjoy the cookie. Now, sometime before cookie 12, it quit being cookie time. And if you're paying attention to cookie time, you realize when it's over. But do I just endlessly chase things rather than actually being in the moment, being with the thing that's happening right now?

[30:00]

Who would take the wasteful delight in the spark from the Flintstone? In this monastery, we have so many different things that might seem like a barrier to being here and practicing with us. You have people walking around with black clothes, doing very specific things in very specific ways, many times in silence, turning in specific ways at specific times with different bells. And what I want to say and just open up, and I'm sure you know this, but why not shine a spotlight on it, is that these things, these robes, these robes are not efficient. They have really, really long sleeves. And it's so much easier to bow in my workout gear. Don't rush through this moment, Michael. Be here now. In fact, your sleeves will droop on the ground unless you keep your hand in Shashu. Be with this moment as you bow.

[31:05]

Don't rush through this moment. Wear the clothes that are inefficient, that take a long time to put on. And by the way, we're going to, if you want to be a priest, we'll give you something to sew. And it's going to take 14,000 stitches. And you have to say, I take refuge in Buddha, Dharma, and Sangha with each stitch. 14,000 of them. It does depend on how tall you are. You have to sew more if you're taller. As the scaffolding to do the work. Don't be in such a rush, Michael. You've got the time. Be right here with this needle and this thread. This is the most important thing you can be doing on the planet. Give it your full attention. And when you put it on, it's folded in a certain way. It comes out of the envelope in a certain way. You put it on your head. You chant the rogue chant. You put it on.

[32:06]

And then you're even less efficient moving around the monastery. And if you want to do something like use the restroom or sweep the floor, you have to take it off and fold it in a very specific way and stick it back in an envelope. These things are all teachers for me to remember to meet the next person. And as you see, all the different rituals that happen around this monastery, they aren't hurdles of accomplishment like you're six years old and they ask you to go to the front of the class and to do the math problem. They aren't tests, litmus tests of your legitimacy of being a good monk or a bad monk. No, they're actually completely empty. They're completely nothing until you take them up for it to help you be here now. That's all they're here for. You can't do them wrong. For crowd control, someone might come along and correct you and go, okay, we're walking that way. Or let's take our shoes off. But you haven't broken anyone's religious experience. You haven't destroyed anything that is happening in the universe that's wrong religiously.

[33:09]

It's all for you right now. It's just the scaffolding to help you do the work to be this person with this body, in this mind, in this moment. That's all they are here for. And we want to share them with you. And if you want to come to Zendo Forms, or you want to know about Zazen instruction, or you want to know more about the rituals and why we do what we do here, it's because it's the scaffolding to do the work of helping people learn how to be right here, right now, and to treasure the thing that's happening. Because there's beauty and wonder in the mundane once you let it catch on fire, once you let it unfold and show you what is in it. Multitudes are in every single moment. And as you walk around the grounds here today at Green Gulch and you see the different things that are here, there's a whole legacy of people who lived here and who got up when they were tired and worked when they were a little frazzled and stayed on a team and worked through the difficulty between them and another team member because that was practice.

[34:20]

so that you and I can be here today and practice together because you are Zen Center you are here today and Zen Center is just the next person that you meet here and what it is that we're doing together and so I hope this encourages you in your practice and you realize that Zen Center is just here to share this with you and to share this with the world It's nothing more than a novelty if it just becomes a weekend hobby where it's only here. We want to actually tell you what we've learned about taking it off the cushion and how to let it breathe in all the spaces that you live. When you're making your bed, when you're riding the bus, when you're driving your car, when you're in that meeting and that person says that thing that you just totally don't agree with and you just realize, okay, how am I going to come back and meet this moment? Because that's where Zen lives.

[35:24]

It's in all the spaces where your heart is beating and you are with another person. It's in all the spaces when you're all by yourself and you're bored or you're lonely. And you exhale and then you just go wash your bowl. Thank you for listening to this podcast. offered by the San Francisco Zen Center. Our programs are made possible by the donations we receive. Please help us to continue to realize and actualize the practice of giving by offering your financial support. For more information, visit sfzc.org and click Giving. May we fully enjoy the Dharma.

[36:19]

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