This podcast is offered by the San Francisco Zen Center on the web at www.sfzc.org. Our public programs are made possible by donations from people like you. Good morning. I hope everyone is doing well on this chilly November morning. See some scarves in the zendo. Lots of scarves and mufflers and hats outside and big woolly socks. People adjusting to change in the season. I'd like to say at the outset, surprise, my talk is just to encourage you in your practice.

[01:09]

That's all I ever have in mind. And of course, I want to thank and acknowledge my teacher, the old Buddha in the East Bay, Sojin Mel Weitzman Roshi. I'm really happy to be your servant. We talked about that in the senior staff Chosan we had when Beka Roshi was here. And I usually say that when we do tangario orientations. I think my role in this monastery is I'm your servant.

[02:16]

I don't know exactly what defines tanto. Sometimes when we introduce senior staff, when senior staff are asked to introduce themselves, I say tanto relates to that seat over there that platform is the tan and the tan to is the head of the tan head seat on the tan so that's that seat on the end I keep that end of the tan anchored down maybe that's what defines it I don't know actually don't know but I can tell you one thing that I've experienced from that seat is that Leslie and I Leslie our abiding teacher sits over here in the Godo seat

[03:32]

as these are Godo Roshi and we both sit facing out and when the front doors are opened we have quite a nice view it's a nice view out there so I've been enjoying the view from that seat for about two and a half years and enjoying watching the changing seasons you know sometimes the doors open and all the trees are in full leaf beautiful green sometimes doors open and trees are totally bare you know because the trees at least this direction are all deciduous trees.

[04:37]

We live in the California riparian corridor ecology, so we have lots of deciduous trees. Native maple, alder, sycamore predominate. There's quite a few. And we've planted a few. Sometimes service might end, breakfast ends, front doors are opened, and it's snowing. Oh, snow. How pretty. Sometimes new shoots. Anyway, you get the picture. I appreciated, wow, it's really been something, I must say, to have listened to nine way-seeking mind talks on three consecutive nights prior to today.

[05:55]

That might be a tasahara first, and I actually really enjoyed it, really enjoyed it. And I was tempted. I was tempted to do a Wasting Mind Talk this morning. But I'm not going to. But maybe a little bit. A little bit. I appreciated Reen saying that nature, the natural world, was Dharmagate. And actually, she just assumed it's Dharmagate for everyone. which, yeah, I'll go along with it. So we have a very wonderful opportunity to appreciate that and practice with that here in the wilderness.

[07:00]

One time we were doing nenju ceremony and we were all lined up on the ngawa in front of the zendo as usual and just standing there as usual seems to be the bulk of nenju ceremony is just standing there on the ngawa and a great horned owl that tall came and alighted on one of the branches of this maple tree right here and stared at us. What you doing? Animals are very curious. Temple Grandin said that's like the most basic animal emotion for all kinds of animals, including human animal. Yeah, it was just like what are all these people doing standing there so quietly?

[08:15]

It was kind of curious. Just came down and had a look. Maybe the owl was arousing way-seeking mind. So, in honor of the season, I thought I would introduce a very seasonal koan from the Blue Cliff Record. It's Case 27 and it's about Yunmen. Yunmen means cloud gate. What a great Dharma name. Yunmenwenyan who lived from age 64 to 949 in the Common Era, really the heart of Tang Dynasty flowering of Zen, the golden age of Zen, as they say.

[09:29]

And Jung Lin was a very, very renowned Zen master. R.H. Blythe compared him to Shakespeare in his facility with words. He is featured in many koans, in all the koan collections, and was the founder of one of the five schools of Zen. When the Shuso, in the Shuso's verse on the Shipei, the staff, the Dharma staff, the Shuso says, At Shaolin Temple, it burst forth the five petals of Zen. And this is the five schools of Zen. Only two of them are really active to this day, which is Soto and Rinzai. But Yunmen had a whole school of Zen named after him, the Unman school.

[10:32]

Which was famous for turning words. Like I said, Yunmin was well-known for his love of language, his ease with language, and his use of the turning words. He's also known for answering his own questions. He did that a lot. He would ask the assembly something, and then he would not even give him a chance, and he would answer his own question. So this koan, though, actually, is a monk. A monk asked Yunmin, how is it when the tree withers and the leaves fall? And Yunmin said, body exposed in the golden wind. How is it when the tree withers and the leaves fall?

[11:37]

Yunmin said, body exposed. in the golden wind. Oh, by the way, I have to show you my sutra cover. Uh-huh, uh-huh. It's all autumn leaves. This came from Chico. But there's a lot of leaves on here that you can recognize around here, like kinkgo and sumac and... Ornamental persimmon, which we have up there alongside the fleet parking, alongside the shed up there. Beautiful persimmon trees. Japanese maple. We have many of those. Yeah. How is it when the tree withers and the leaves fall?

[12:45]

The monk here is asking about something very basic. It's classic. The way everything changes in life. Everything. This is our experience. Every time we think we've got something settled, we've got it figured out. Okay, I know how it is. This is the way it happens. Poof. Changes. Everything changes. How do we practice with that? We were we have been practicing as a community with a lot of grief and loss in this practice period.

[14:02]

It could be said that that's the theme of the practice period, perhaps. Officially, the theme of the practice period is Hinayana practice with Mahayana mind, but the theme of grief and loss has been coming up over and over again. And the number of plaques with names on our altar have, well, it's just been quite something to watch them come and go off our main altar, like autumn leaves, actually. And it came up in the Wayseeking Mind talks last night again. The tree withers and the leaves fall.

[15:06]

So this is something, this is something we notice when we come to practice. the light of well actually the Indian Buddhist philosopher Nagarjuna well known for saying way seeking mind speaking of way seeking mind talks way seeking mind is the mind that sees into impermanence is the mind that sees that the tree withers and the leaves fall everything changes so here we are in this practice period you know a lot of us all of us have gone through a great deal of effort to be here to practice together as a community in this way to support each other

[16:28]

to investigate the great matter. For myself, here's my little bit of way-seeking mind talk. I just noticed that when I was practicing in Berkeley with Sojin Roshi, and I had a fine career in healthcare, that I enjoyed a lot. I really, I really enjoyed, I had a very fulfilling job, Altibates Medical Center in Berkeley, and I loved it. But it just seemed like more and more the things that mattered to me started to matter less. And that what was mattering more was to do this practice.

[17:43]

And that's when I thought, well, gee, I could go to Tassajara and do this 24-7. What happens when our thoughts, our emotions, our ideas, our plans, our optimism, our pessimism, our opinions, our psychological problems, our expectations, our karmic formations, all kinds of attachments. What happens when they all fall away? And Yunmin was famous for giving answers that accord with the question. So the monk is asking about, you know, the tree withering and the leaves falling. It's a very autumnal kind of koan.

[18:46]

And Yunmin says, body exposed in the golden wind. In Chinese culture, golden wind, is autumn. It's another, it's a poetic way of expressing autumn. When, oh, not too long ago, a few days ago, we did the recession after breakfast and walked back to the Abbot's Garden with Abbot Steve and Leslie and the Shuso and myself and Jisha and we got to the Abbot's Garden and bowed out And Leslie just looked up at all the leaves and she said, golden light, golden light, golden wind. Gold is also the element that rules autumn in Chinese folklore, whatever. There's also some thought that

[19:58]

The monk might have been playing with Yun-men in his advanced age. I don't know. But his answer accords with the question. When all these things, all these ideas, opinions, attachments fall away. What's left? Body exposed in the golden wind. When a kid draws a picture of a tree, there might just be a tree trunk and a big green blob on top, right? That's a tree. But if a kid draws a picture of a tree in winter, then

[20:59]

You see the tree trunk and then sticks, branches. That's what you see when the leaves fall off. Exposed. Exposed. This is about vulnerability. And this goes on. of course in our lives in the seasons of our lives uh the leaves don't necessarily stay shed doesn't quite work that way uh even great teachers have problems and uh I think that Shakyamuni Buddha came to terms with this under another tree called the Bodhi tree.

[22:08]

And he shared with us the first noble truth. That there's this element in life. How do we live with it? So, yeah, one of the themes of this practice period is Hinayana practice with Mahayana mind. I understand that as, well, first off, we seldom say Hinayana. That's something Suzuki Roshi said. But usually, you know, because Hinayana means lesser vehicle, we don't usually say that, right? It's slightly pejorative.

[23:13]

It's like the Bolsheviks and the Mensheviks in the Russian Revolution. The Mensheviks didn't really want to be the Mensheviks. It means the minority party. No, wait. So we usually say Theravadan instead of Hinayana, the school of the elders. But the way I understand Hinayana practice is it's a strict practice. It's a strict limiting our activity. Limiting our activity. Coming together, particularly in Tassahara, practice period, supporting each other to really dive into practice by the means of the schedule and the Shingi. just taking care of whatever's in front of you.

[24:15]

Completely devoting your attention and your energy to that. Very few distractions. And I was talking to somebody and I said, limiting our activity, they said, does that include limiting your mental activity? And I said, yes. without even thinking about it. Ha ha ha. Limiting our mental activity. How do we understand that? It's not constricting our mental activity. It's not clamping down on our mental activity. It's Suzuki Roshi talked about giving your horse a wide, wide field. This is actually Mahayana mind.

[25:23]

So that's how I understand Hinayana practice with Mahayana mind. This is body exposed in the golden wind There's something so poetic about this expression. To me, actually points to the flavor of zazen, the flavor of shikantaza. This koan is a great favorite of Paul Hallers. He's been known to say it in the middle of the period of zazen. body exposed in the golden wind. The tree withers and the leaves fall.

[26:37]

Just staying present for that activity. happening I've heard it I don't know anything about modern physics but I've heard there's supposed to be this like neutrino wind that's like this constant stream of neutrinos whatever they are that's going right through everything through us through our bodies through the zendo through the earth through stars through Apparently, just this constant flow of neutrinos. Maybe if we sit quietly enough, we can just experience the neutrinos flowing. body exposed in the golden wind this is vulnerability completely letting go so the tree withers and the leaves fall

[28:14]

Is that something you make that happen? Or it just happens? That's a really good question. I think that's a question really worth pondering. Do the trees decide, okay, I'm ready. Maybe this tree in the courtyard that nobody seems to be able to tell me the name of. Chinese elm? There's this tree quite prominent right now in the middle of the courtyard. And maybe it's saying, I'm going to hang on to these beautiful yellow leaves just a little while longer because I know it's so awesome. maybe, but I kind of doubt it.

[29:19]

But for humans, it might be a little more complicated, a little more intricate. So, for me, this koan points to something that's a concept that's pretty important in Sotozen and especially part of Dogenzenji's transmission story. In Japanese, Shinjin Datsuraku. Shinjin Datsuraku. And that means, variously translated, body-mind dropped off or body-mind cast off and you might know the story when Dogen was practicing in his master's temple in Mount Tiantong in China Tiantong Rujing was walking around the Zendo as the monks were practicing Zazen

[30:45]

And, you know, there was a monk next to Dogen who was, you know, so tai tai. So tai tai. Can't keep my eyes open. You know, it's pretty prevalent. You know that. We know that. And... Ru Jing takes off his slipper and hits the monk with his slipper. And says, I forget what it's supposed to have said, but something like, why are you wasting your time sleeping? Don't you know that Zazen is body-mind cast off? Body-mind dropped off. And Dogen was enlightened. He hit the guy next to Dogen, but Dogen was enlightened.

[31:51]

I don't know what it did for the guy next to Dogen. Woke him up, I guess. Anyhow, then Dogen goes to see Ru Jing in his chambers later on. And he says, basically, I got it. Body, mind, cast off. Body and mind are cast off. Body and mind dropped off. Shinjin Datsuraku. And Rujing says, Datsuraku Shinjin, cast off body and mind. And Dogen says, well, don't give the transmission too lightly, even though I do have to get back to Japan and found the monastery and write the Shobogenzo and do all these other awesome things before I die at age 53. Still, don't give the transmission too lightly.

[32:56]

And Ru Jing says, Tatsuraku, Tatsuraku, or whatever the Chinese was. I mean, that's Japanese. He said it in Chinese, I'm sure. But he's casting off. Let go of your ideas about What is casting off? So, is this something you do or something that happens to you? I think is a really good question. Aiken Roshi, famous for saying, enlightenment is an accident, but you can make yourself accident prone. Okay. And in another Dharma talk earlier in this practice period, Abbot Steve mentioned this pretty well-known exchange between Suzuki Roshi and Blanche, where Blanche was proudly talking about her gains that she made in practicing zazen.

[34:13]

And Suzuki Roshi corrected her. He said, it's a big mistake to think that you can sit zazen. Zazen sits zazen. Still, there's something asked of you. This compound word, tatsuraku, the raku is actually a very sort of passive sense, meaning. Raku is like something that happens to someone or something like leaves scattering in the breeze or the fading of the light at dusk. And the datsu part is more outwardly active. It's why it's sometimes translated as casting off, letting go.

[35:16]

I made a decision to let go. made a decision to enact the act of ending activity is something deliberate. And together, they're a little bit undetermined. The best translation might be to molt or to shed. one well-known analogy for experience of enlightenment or letting go of, yeah, forget about enlightenment, just letting go of past habits, associations, karmic formations, psychological problems, you name it, that are no longer serving you.

[36:22]

is like a snake shedding its skin. You know, a snake actually has to do something. A snake sort of finds a quiet place and sheds its skin. This is a fun thing about studying, is that... I discovered that the word Datsuraku is not used in contemporary Japanese hardly at all. But it's a technical word. But sometimes it shows up as a translation for deciduous. Like autumn leaves. about that kind of fun Shinjin Datsuraku body mind cast off is the experience of Zazen um

[37:53]

And it's not something you do and not something that someone does for you. Dogen was very clear on this point. He mentions it, actually, in the fascicle I talked about in my last talk, Shobo Genzo Gyoji. He says that Zazen is the supreme activity of continuous practice. Mujo no Gyoji. supreme activity of continuous practice which is neither self-generated nor generated by others yet upholds and sustains myself and all beings throughout the universe So this is vulnerability.

[38:55]

This is letting yourself, putting yourself in the position to be that body, to be that body exposed to the golden wind exposed in the golden wind and anyone born in a human body is got everything they need to take that up if you want to if you're willing to let go willfulness if you're willing to be that vulnerable so like I said body exposed in the golden wind I think really for me really feels like

[40:20]

feels like the experience of shikantaza, the experience of just sitting. This is my zazen instruction in five words, right? Stay present for whatever happens. That's it. Just stay present for whatever happens. You know, these cases in the Blue Cliff Record, they're fun to read because there's all these introductions and verses by Shui To and then commentaries and commentaries on the verses by Yuan Wu.

[41:29]

And in the beginning of One of Yuan Wu's commentaries on this case, he mentions the other thing that we've been studying in this practice period, the harmony of difference and equality. He says, Yuan Wu says, the ancient man, Shi To said, when you receive words, you must understand the source. Don't set up standards on your own. We chant this as, hearing the words understand the meaning. Don't set up standards of your own. But I kind of like this translation. When you receive words, you must understand the source. This is like... Sojourner Roshi talks about Suzuki Roshi...

[42:35]

saying, read the other side of the page. What's the source of the words? It's not about the words. So this is the invitation for this practice period and for the rest of your life. This is a big opportunity. I know our mid-practice period event, a.k.a. Skit Night, is coming up in a couple days, although we're well past mid-practice period. But don't think about that. Tomorrow is a regular day in the calendar.

[43:42]

Isn't that right, Ino-san? Just a regular monastic day. Good old zazen and work. Every day is very precious. So let's try. as a community to support each other, to be those trees not moving, just body exposed in the golden wind. Another name for the zendo is the withered tree hall. You knew that, right?

[44:44]

This is the withered tree hall. They say, they say, if you get close enough to the withered tree, you can hear a dragon singing. So let's all practice getting real close, getting really intimate, getting vulnerable, exposed, body exposed in the golden wind. Maybe you'll hear a dragon singing.

[45:56]

Huinang, the sixth ancestor in the Platform Sutra, advises us to realize your own Dharmakaya. How do you do that? by not setting up standards of your own. So be open to the mystery. Be vulnerable to the mystery. Stay present for whatever happens. This is exposed in the golden wind. And I think that's all I wanted to say about that autumnal koan.

[47:17]

But maybe there's some questions. This mic is bugging me. Sort of gentle, creaky voice, like a mast on a ship. Very odd. Devin, yes? What is the dragon singing? Oh, that's a whole other Dharma talk. Yeah, that's a fascicle in Shobha Genzo. that is very difficult, very difficult classical. But Dogen takes that question up. It's a poetic image from Chinese Zen. And yeah, Devon, what is the dragon singing in the withered tree?

[48:23]

Dogen doesn't really answer the question. I have some experience. It's letting go of my experience, actually. It's letting go of my subjective evaluation of what zazen is, what practice is. And opening up to what? The source. These neutrinos. I don't know what. A dragon singing in a withered tree. Hinayana practice with Mahayana mind.

[49:46]

Yes. Do I ever engage in Mahayana practice? Well, I don't know. Better ask Solzhen Roshi. I guess I might say that I'm trying to engage in Mahayana practice when I say, don't believe your thoughts, Greg. Don't put another head on top of your own. It's the activity of limiting our activity.

[50:48]

I'm not saying that's what Hinayana practice is, but that's how I understand Hinayana practice with my yana mind. What I believe Suzuki Roshi was pointing to is the Hinayana practice part is limiting our activity. Strict practice. You might have noticed. It is pretty strict. Well, you know, when I asked Abbot Steve in the Shosan ceremony what is strict practice, What did he say? Something like not making excuses. Not fooling yourself.

[51:50]

Something like that. I should know. I was standing right there. Or kneeling right there. Yeah. So, you know, I think we can do that. Unfortunately, I'm sorry to say, I think it is possible for us to wiggle. Don't wiggle. Don't squirm. And I think Steve said, if you squirm, it's just squirming Buddha. But still, at least notice. And then, thank goodness, we have every morning the pure practice of confession and repentance. I love that we start every service that way during practice period. Because... That's what it comes back to, you know. Maybe that's Mahayana practice too. I confess.

[52:56]

I'm a human being. I confess. I'm not up for being vulnerable today. In fact, I've got quite a lot. I want to defend today. And we hear each other's confession. And we support each other. So I guess that's how that works. Is that okay? Yes, Curtis? I have a question about vulnerability. The professor had a comment about neutrinos. Please. Because I don't know nothing about neutrinos. Tell me. When I was a kid, my parents and scientists took me to Sudbury Neutrino Observatory in Northern Ontario. You can observe them? Well, in very special conditions.

[53:58]

Okay. The only condition in which scientists can observe neutrinos, and as in the case in Sudbury, they do it at the bottom of an old nickel mine under hundreds of feet of igneous slag. Because there's so much radiation, so much other... waves of all kinds of things going on that neutrinos, which as you said, go through like everything. The other stuff doesn't. If they shelter themselves, shield themselves from all the other interference, then in this big swimming pool of heavy water, they can see the things of these neutrinos that go through, whereas the other stuff didn't reach down through all that shield. So that's just something about neutrinos, which I think brings up my question, which is something about... shielding, vulnerability. There are only certain conditions under which it's possible to observe neutrinos because there's so much other stuff going on. My question is about, I guess, where does material harm fit into the teaching of vulnerability?

[55:02]

I mean, if I'm going around doing something that is the same practice as everybody else, but I find it unpreparable. not so comfortable or something. There's something about being open to that, where I just be vulnerable, keep on encountering what I'm encountering. And I think that on the other end of the spectrum, maybe a woman who's being abused by her husband, you wouldn't tell her, oh, just be vulnerable to it. I think that in that spectrum somewhere, there's a point of action. Like, no, actually, this is harming. And furthermore, as hard as it is for me to see that point, I think that it's also hard for other people on whom I rely to see that point and to say, oh yeah, well, this is, to say, oh yeah, that's really the wind blowing the, that's really the wind. And, you know, at some point along the wind blowing the leaves off the tree, you know, there might be a kid there shaking the tree and the leaves are falling off and that's one thing.

[56:03]

And there also might be some dude with a chainsaw hacking off the winds of the tree. And it's like, and somebody else is like, no, honestly, that's just the wind. I think it's hard to see that point. How do you know when it's harm and when it's openness? You know what? You have to tell us. Nobody can do that for you. And you have to study it very carefully. You have to be courageous. And that means having the courage to see things as it is. To see things, to really be open, be open to what's going on.

[57:13]

Be open to, be vulnerable to what's going on without kidding yourself, without believing your own story or somebody else's story. You look carefully. Consider this matter very carefully. You can trust that. This is a very important point. And to me, it's included in being open to the mystery. It's not separate from the set called open to the mystery.

[58:22]

How you do this? Expound the Dharma with this body. Carefully. I think of Darlene Cohen. You know? She wasn't foolish. She did what she needed to do to take care of her body so she could take care of her students. It was completely selfless. Darlene's taking care of her body. Completely selfless act. And she was very devoted to paying attention, doing exactly what she needed to do so that she could continue to practice, so that she could take care of her students.

[59:35]

That's what I think about that. You said igneous slag. That's pretty cool. Yes, John. Yes, the contrarian in you. Oh, maybe, perhaps. I'm sorry, if there was a question in there, I missed it. Bingo.

[61:04]

Yeah. It's okay. And thank you for your confession in front of the whole community. You know, this is what I was talking about with Eric. That's it. That's the vulnerability right there. Yeah, that contrarian one is practicing hard, wants to be exposed, wants that vulnerability. And here it is with the whole community. How wonderful. How wonderful is that? You know, like I said, it's not like the leaves fall and that's it.

[62:14]

There are seasons in life, you know. And it's an ongoing thing. Shinjin dasuraku is an ongoing thing. called, what do you call it? Because I kind of like that a lot. Oh yeah, Mujo no Gyoji. The supreme activity of continuous practice. That's what you're up to. That's what we're up to. That's what all the ancestors of India, China, and Japan have been up to. Can I get a woohoo? No, it's not work circle.

[63:20]

Yes, Ryan. I can't speak for Master Dogen, but I was thinking about Yasi's Wayseeking Mind talk. She talked about teaching English as a second language and the present continuous tense. Present continuous tense. In that moment, perhaps, awakening.

[64:26]

Right? That's the present continuous, right? Awakening. Not awaken or awakened, but awakening. You could say awakening occurred, has been occurring, continues to occur. There is awakening. then, you know, there are moments in space and time when you'll see glimpses. That's a song by Ian Dury and the Blockheads. You'll see glimpses. Yes, yes.

[65:35]

Can you say something about being seized and reborn? Uh-huh. Uh-huh, uh-huh. A fine Anglo-Saxon word that comes from agriculture, where means of agriculture is putting to plant the seed, stick the finger in the ground and plant the seed there in the ground. The director and I were talking about the meaning of the word harrow. That was a harrowing experience, generally considered something unpleasant.

[66:40]

But it comes from another, we should really have that, Steve, right? He's the farmer. But this is farmer's end, so even though I don't know much about farming, the harrow, I looked it up, because it was kind of, where does that word come from? It's an agricultural implement. that you drag over the ground after it's been plowed to remove the weeds and to prepare it for planting. Suzuki Roshi said, Mahayana practice, Mahayana practice comes from emptiness, like emptiness is a garden. But things grow. Grow things. It's alive. The ground of emptiness is prepared.

[67:43]

Body exposed to golden wind might be a harrowing experience for you. out of the ground of emptiness comes awakening comes continuous practice all your experiences all your suffering all that stuff is Nothing other than the ground of awakening. And, you know, even like when it's the most painful, when you say, stay present for whatever happens, oh no.

[68:48]

No. H-E double hockey sticks, no. Absolutely not. Not for this. I'm checking out. I'm out of here. Or not. Or not. seizing and being reborn. Yeah. Those are the seasons of life. This is also, you know, in Buddhism, in classic Buddhist teaching, the 12-fold chain of Pratyasamapara.

[69:53]

Dependent origination. It's always going on. And each link on the chain is a place for stepping off from samsara to nirvana at any point. And maybe, maybe, particularly in the place where you say, stay present for this? Oh, no. Right there. Right there. Bring your attention to that. Because that could be it. That could be the link on the chain where it's really vulnerable. Where the opening is really ready to happen. That could be. Keep checking it out. Yeah.

[71:33]

I don't know about burying yourself under slag, but I would say that in the conditions of, in particular, monastic practice period, I don't know how I feel about burying yourself under slag, but Brother Curtis was saying there's all this other radiation, there's all this other information in the universe that makes it hard to feel. You know, and I was like, I'll just confess, I was way out of my depth with that whole neutrino thing. But, you know, there's all this other, can we say, distractions, information, stories, input is going on, which in the container of Ongo, you might have noticed. So, you know, all my ideas about who I am, it's what Leslie James likes to say, you know, I'm a person who Sunday morning, actually I think it is Sunday morning, isn't it?

[73:04]

That's just a fluke that I know that it's Sunday morning. I assure you. You know, Sunday morning, I like to have the Sunday New York Times and go down to the corner and have a croissant latte, you know. And I do this and that, and I'm such and such a person. And in Ango, it's like stripped away, stripped away. That's why this is the withered tree hall. Forget it. I'm just one of the bodies standing on the Angawa in Nenju. That was a big opening for me. One Nenju a long time ago. I was just standing there and I thought, I don't have to be anything to anybody right now.

[74:09]

I don't have to have my job face or my friendly face or my anything face. I just be like nothing, nobody. I'm just a body standing on the Engawa. What a relief, actually. What a gift, if you can see it that way. Sometimes it's very painful, of course. Sometimes it is very painful and very hard to let go. associations ideas and so forth might be easy for trees the leaves just fall off for humans as I was saying it can be a little more complicated you are completely exposed

[75:10]

We are completely exposed. That's what Mel said to Blanche, right? You know that story? When Blanche was going to the Berklee Zendo, when she started practicing, Blanche and Lou used to go to the Berklee Zendo on Dwight Way, and Mel came back from Tassajara, and she said, Tassajara, I keep hearing about Tassajara, Tassajara. What's the big deal about Tassajara? What makes that place so special anyway? And Mel said, well, seems to me everyone else can see your stuff, so you might as well see it too. Yeah, so we are all the withered trees. We are all body exposed in the golden wind, for sure. feels like a good ending point. Thank you for listening to this podcast offered by the San Francisco Zen Center.

[76:20]

Our Dharma talks are offered free of charge and this is made possible by the donations we receive. Your financial support helps us to continue to offer the Dharma. For more information, Visit sfzc.org and click Giving.

[76:42]

@Transcribed_UNK
@Text_v005
@Score_94.35