So, I always say on the last day of Sashim, not to think, not to get stuck with thinking this is the last day of Sashim. When we come to, when the horses get close to the bottom, they start to know. They smell their hair. There's this tendency always, well, soon it will be over. So we should be careful not to turn the end of our session into an experience contest to see if we can wait it out to the end. There's nothing to wait for.

[01:02]

Just to do it from beginning to end completely in the same way. When you play music, you keep the same rhythm all the way through the tune. At the very end, sometimes you slow up, you know? But you play the tune all the way through the same intensity. from beginning to end. And that tune is one whole lifetime. Even if it's just a short gigging, it's one whole lifetime from beginning to end. So Sishin is one whole episode of life, completing itself one whole complete lifetime. when we leave this particular form of life, then we'll be reborn into another form of life.

[02:16]

You can call it whatever you want. But what really is it? Which brings up my subject, the subject of my daughter. The other day, someone was very kind, I don't know who, but they left this offering at my door. It says, Sojourn, what is it? Sojourn is my name, if you just know that. What is it? It looks like various things. It looks like Well, it could be a heart, or it could be a turn, or it could be something that's a truck running over, and you don't see. Something, it looks like something. It's very dark, and it's kind of red, and, uh, very interesting.

[03:29]

Deep, very deep. You can really get into it. Although at first, at first, it makes you stand up. You don't want to get into it at first. But the more you look at it, the more you can get into it. We call it commonly, we call it, in English, we call it a pepper. We identified it as a pepper. And if you like, I like to smell it. Even though it looks kind of strange, it smells rather wonderful. But what is it? If I say it's a pepper, then I'm ignoring its reality.

[04:53]

And if I say it's not a pepper, then I'm ignoring its existence. Maybe I should tell you what it is. I would eat it, but it's in between like a financial. Nobody's going to own that chair.

[06:25]

This poem is called Shizan's Shippei. Shippei. is a bamboo stick. Sometimes Zen teachers keep a shippei. Will you shut up? That's loud, isn't it? Sometimes Zen teachers keep a shippei, which is a bamboo stick, and they use it for various purposes. Sometimes to point with, sometimes to hit with. But this is called a kotsu. It's not a shippei, but related. We use a shippei in shusō ceremonies.

[07:32]

Shusō is the head monk in the training period, and the head monk has a ceremony called the shuso pasen dharma taiwa or dharma kanga ceremony and well the monk's question the shuso and the shuso has the spirit and it's of a sword. And Jesus said something like, this staff is once a black snake. So in this koan,

[08:37]

Shuzan Osho held up a shipe. Like this. And he said, you monks, if you call this a shipe, you oppose its reality. You call this We call this by its name. We call it a shippei. We oppose its reality. If you do not call it a shippei, you ignore the fact. You ignore its existence. Tell me, you monks, what will you call it? And then Murman, Master Muman has a palentine. He says, if you call it the shipe, you oppose its reality.

[09:45]

If you do not call it the shipe, you ignore the fact. Words are not available. Silence is not available. Tell me quickly, what is it? And then Master Muman has a verse about it. He says, holding up the shippei, he takes his life. He takes life and he gives life. He takes life and he gives life. He kills and he brings back to life. Opposing and ignoring is your weak. Even Buddhas and patriarchs beg for their lives. So everything has a name.

[10:47]

In the Bible, I think, one version of the Bible says, in the beginning was the Word. That's pretty interesting. The beginning of what? In the beginning was the Word. In the beginning of discriminating consciousness. According to Buddhist understanding, there's no beginning and no end. What we call life has no special beginning and no special end. It's just a constant change, constant appearance, and constant change. the law of cause and effect, things arise. And in the same understanding, we realize there's actually no birth and death.

[11:58]

But there are two levels. On one level, things appear and disappear. or things seem to appear and disappear. And we call this birth and death. But on another level, on a bigger and wider level, things appear and disappear, but actually nothing substantial has appeared or disappeared. So on one level, we can say, yes, this is birth and this is death. But on a deeper level, wider, bigger level, there are just waves on a huge ocean. Wave after wave on a limitless ocean. Ocean is waves and waves is ocean.

[13:08]

in the beginning was the word, the beginning of discriminating consciousness. We talk about Adam and Eve. Eve offered Adam the apple, which enabled him to see the difference between good and bad and right and wrong. realized the differences between things. Adam went down and said, yikes, I don't have any clothes on me. So he put a fig leaf in front of his penis. This is the beginning of discriminating practices. So when Adam

[14:32]

ate the apple, he realized the differences between things. In other words, he fell out of, they fell out of the Garden of Eden, which is the realization of totality and resistance. Everything had a name. My name is Adam and my name is Eve. This is a snake, this is an apple, this is a tree, this is the ground, this is the sky. And the beginning of problems through a dualistic understanding.

[15:41]

inherited the problem of duality. And Zazen is the practice of coming back into the Garden League. wholeness before discrimination. So, Zazim is the practice of big mind, which includes discriminating mind, but is free from discriminating mind. Mostly in our world, because of the nature of our world, we live in the realm of duality and exist in the realm of duality.

[17:00]

It's very difficult for us to see the oneness of this duality that we live in. It's very difficult for us to see that opposites belong to each other and that everything comes from the same root. Surzazen is the practice which enables us tie all the opposites together at their root. Pleasure and pain, good and bad, thinking and not thinking, discrimination and non-discrimination.

[18:11]

It all meets, everything meets in one place. They all meet in one place and shake hands. They disappear. Everything is reconciled and broken. And everything disappears in utter darkness. other darkness. Nothing exists. Nothing exists means nothing exists by itself. Now this, whatever it is, this pepper has a Thich Nhat Hanh

[19:21]

so eloquently described it, is a piece of sunshine, a piece of rain, a piece of sky, a piece of ground, a piece of breath. There's no end to what this lump, beautiful lump is. The whole universe is this lump. What is it? Well, it's a pepper. Of course. As long as I know that it's not, I can call it whatever I want. As long as I know that this is not a pepper, I can call it a pepper without any problem. I can call it my hand.

[20:21]

I can call it your nose. We call it the eye of a monk. There's an old saying, the eye, the whole universe is the eyeball of a monk. Please be careful where you think. monk asked, Shui Phong.

[21:24]

Shui Phong came out of his door and the monk came, two monks came to visit him and he said, what is it? Or, what is this? Or, what is this? And the monk said, what is it? Or maybe he said, what is it? Anyway, what is it? He says, always and basic koan for our life. This is called, maybe you can call this basic doubt. In Zen people, I always say you should always have a big doubt. Big doubt means not to take anything for granted. It doesn't mean you should be skeptical.

[22:26]

Skepticism is a hindrance. Of the five hindrances, skeptical doubt is a fifth, I think. Skeptical doubt doesn't allow you to have optimism. doubt is very helpful and very necessary. If your practice doesn't have doubt, then you should be very careful because doubt questions everything. The quality of doubt is that it doesn't take anything for granted. So, We, in our life, we get used to our surroundings. We get used to our home, our friends, automobiles, streets, work, the way things go.

[23:40]

We get used to things. And then we take everything from that and then suddenly somebody dies or something disappears. or things change, and you say, what? How'd that happen? Or the green mover looks us in the face. Wait a minute. Wait a minute. I'm not ready yet. Sorry, doubt. is the quality of not taking anything for granted. But this morning we were sitting in the zendo and we didn't expect anything. It was wonderful. We were not expecting anything but then the sun came out at the end of the oven and it was like somebody turned on this tremendous light and flooded the zendo with it.

[24:50]

And it was extraordinary because our minds were just completely open. Everything was open. Just, whew. It was wonderful. What a great gift. I remember the first time I sat Sashi, I think it was, yeah, I guess it was the first time. And the time when I ran away, we were having tea. And after all this strong effort and not much, nothing to do with, nothing to rely on, suddenly there was this little cup of tea and a cookie. It was so wonderful. I didn't expect anything, but it was the most wonderful thing. It was just Perfect, a real refreshing, real refresher.

[25:55]

The doubt keeps us from taking things for granted. What is it? The essence of doubt is, what is it? What is it really? But this is a koan. This is a basic koan. What is it? Basic basis of investigation. You don't have to answer that question.

[27:01]

All you have to do is ask it. This is a voice that's thrown out into the universe. It's not a voice that's directed at your own mind. But it's thrown out into the universe. And the universe answers the question. can't have your own answer. We should each have an answer. We should be able to, not an answer, but a response. If you answer with your mouth, that's not right. And if you don't answer with your mouth, that's not right. in a sense, we're always cornered.

[28:09]

How can we walk freely in reality between yes and no, this and that, right and wrong, good and bad? Is it or isn't it? What is it? What is this? How do we tie the fact with the reality? Sometimes a person is called the link or the pillar between heaven and earth. How do we tie heaven and earth together? Or how do we let heaven and earth flow freely through us.

[29:32]

How do we open that door? but I'm going to take it home and have it for dinner. Thank you. Well, it's really upside down.

[30:32]

The teacher is really a student. And students are really teachers. And it just looks like the teachers are on top and the students are on bottom. But actually the teachers don't really know anything. And they're trying to get something from the students. are very good with the teachers because they really make the teachers feel like foolish. What do you think? I think we tend to lump things together.

[31:46]

Hierarchy is a way that things work. If you have an automobile, there's the motor, the engine, and the wheels, and the body, and the steering wheel, the steering column, thousands of pieces. And they're all put together and called an automobile. I can't tell you what it is, but they're all called an automobile when you put all those parts together. And that's called hierarchy. Each piece has a different function. And in true hierarchy, pieces all have different positions because of their function. And each piece plays a different part, plays a different role.

[32:51]

When we talk about corruption, power, authority, or grasping for authority, that's a different subject. Although they're, wait a minute, that's a different subject, although these two are related. But hierarchy is not necessarily associated with those qualities. Hierarchy is subject to those qualities. It's also subject to a quality called harmony. It's when those qualities become sick or out of balance that we start talking about, that we start talking about hierarchy is bad. Hierarchy is just the order of things, the natural order of things. But the natural order of things can get out of balance and become sick.

[33:58]

Then we say, oh, let's level everything. We're all the same. We're all the same anyway. In a hierarchy, everything has its function. And it seems to be a top and a bottom. call it top and body. Actually, if you look at the world, where is the top, you can say, Greenland is on the North Pole is at the top and the South Pole is at the bottom. But that's just an idea we have because the world is round. Top is just in relation to something else. Bottom is just in relation to something else. There's no top or bottom. So in the real hierarchy, a hierarchy that works in a harmony where all parts are working together for the total harmony of the good, I mean of its gestalt or whatever, then every piece plays a major role.

[35:25]

and there's no need for competition or dominance. When your automobile is working well, all the parts are happy. Even the wheels, even the tires, the tires take the brunt because they're on the road. Even the smallest screw is playing its part and feels happy because the whole hierarchy is working together. But if the engine suddenly stands out and says, I'm better than you, or I want you to do this or that, and starts taking control, then the car doesn't work very well. So what we're talking about is not hierarchy itself. What we're talking about is thickness. And what we're saying now, in the afternoon, late right now, is if you accept the true nature of anything to the rest of it, when you try to accept it, of anything that you realize is there, besides accepting the true nature of your mind, because the true nature of our minds, or I could say mind like that, I don't even know my mind, does analyze, does

[37:03]

Yeah, I'm not denying that. Yeah, that's the other side. Discrimination and non-discrimination for the two sides. I said, non-discrimination includes discrimination. It's this and that. Yes, I can call it a pepper, as long as I understand that it's not a pepper. I can say, it's hot, as long as I understand it. It's not hot. But that's not correct if it's hot. It's not hot.

[38:11]

It's not hot. We just say it's hot. We call it hot. I'll give you an example. If I were to go down to the end of South America and take up all my clothes in the snow, I would freeze to death. But the people that live there don't have any clothes, and they roll around in the snow. To me, it would be very cold. But to them, it's not cold. It's just, we call it cold. I can call it anything I want.

[39:13]

So I can say, yes, it's hot. If I eat the pepper, it's hot. That's right, that's a fact. But it's not necessarily so. Take our idea for ultimate truth. This is the problem. Because we're calling the heart, you know? That's ultimate truth. We call it heart. Ultimate truth has no characteristics. No special characteristics. So, in that case, I... I understand what you are saying. So, as Rokas, as Rokas, we give the meaning, you know, if I say, as I'm slave, I'm not getting anything, you know, I work 18 hours a day, you know, so what kind of, I know, people say, oh, pity, I'm sorry, but I don't go, this is pity, you know, it's okay, right?

[40:32]

It's okay. It's kind of like, well, maybe, well, you know, come back to me if I walk like this and I become sick there almost, you know, just, you know, one week before that, you know. So I say, you know, okay, this is fine because, you know, I want to draw the line because I'm very sure about my body, you know. My, maybe, you know, everything is emptiness, you know. So I want to give you the meaning, my life, this is right, you know. I might do very well or I might not do something, you know. So, I think everything is kind of like, when we give the meaning, you know. We give life meaning. You know, something happens, you know. See, one person can have nothing and feel poor and destitute. Another person can have nothing and feel wealthy. Depends on your attitude.

[41:35]

Yes. We just name things or call it something besides our feelings, attitudes. Yeah, and you know, we grew in this way, you know, sometimes, you know, forget about this body, nothing, you know. So it doesn't work, you know. That's why we can decide to see reality here and now.

[42:39]

And we created ourselves, moment by moment. So when we can accept nothing completely as the bottom of our life, then whatever comes, we can appreciate This moment, you know. Shosan.

[44:22]

And for those of you who don't know, I haven't found Shosan. Shosan, where a kind of formal question answers, a question in your class between you and me. I wanted to give you a question and respond to your question. I don't necessarily answer your question, but I do give you a response. probably done dialogue. And you can, if I respond to you, you can respond back if you feel that you need to. And you can have a dialogue, not done. It's not a long conversation of this

[45:25]

The feeling should be short and concise. Not too much ponder. Not much ponder. So that will be enough. So please, I think there's some good questions.

[45:49]

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