I fractured my ankle about a year ago and haven't gotten back to sitting cross-legged. But I am reminded that sitting in a chair or in any other way is just fine. Now, I think it was in a day like this on the border of an ocean. Have you been down to the beach recently? I live pretty close to that water down there. That our ancestor, Ehe Dogen, left Japan for a little trip to China in search of the true way. He had some questions. He tried to get them answered by traveling around and studying in Japan, but he was not satisfied, he went to China.

[01:13]

Got on a little wooden boat, went across that ocean, very dangerous. Stayed about four years and his search was fruitful. Came back and opened some monasteries, people came and studied with him. Now Dogen wrote a lot, taught a lot, and through his own life and the way he conducted it, manifested the Dharma. When he came back, the first thing he wrote, they say, is something called the Benda Wah. And I just want to read you a little something from that. He wrote this for the... benefit of the people that he came back to help. It says, this is a little bit for sure, and pure practice is for playing freely in samadhi.

[02:19]

Samadhi would be perhaps a clear, open, unimpeded state of mind. When you let go, the Dharma fills your hands. It is not within the boundary of one or many. When you try to speak, it fills your mouth. It is not limited, yet there is no trace. No trace remains. Living Buddhas constantly function in and use this Dharma yet it does not appear in their perception. The wholehearted practice of the way allows all things to exist and enables them to live out oneness in the path of emancipation. Then we are no longer concerned with conceptual distinctions.

[03:26]

So in pure practice, He says there is no longer concern for conceptual distinctions. He also says that the Buddhas function in and use this Dharma, although it does not appear in their perception. They don't see the Dharma. The Dharma isn't out there. And they don't conceptualize the Dharma. They just play in samadhi. What a good thing. Now, it's said that the precepts, you know, the Buddhist precepts, the Bodhisattva precepts, you can imagine, if you don't, you can make them up. And if you feel good about it, I'm sure it would be fine. They say that the precepts are a description, and in this case it would be your description,

[04:30]

of enlightened activity, such as not stealing, not harboring ill will, and so on, being helpful. Now, these are concepts and conceptual distinctions, don't you think? The precepts. So how is it then that a manifesting Buddha does not make these distinctions. Is the Buddha thinking in each moment, I'm not stealing. I'm not going to do this. I'm not going to do that. What is that thing? A PDA, personal digital assistant. You'd have a personal digital assistant with the precept function programmed into it.

[05:32]

And you could put in the situation and then push enter and see what you're supposed to do. Not a bad idea. But there's so many situations. So these concepts and distinctions are ideas that sentient beings like you and I when we are sentient beings, have when we look at the Buddha's activity. We say, oh, look, he doesn't harbor ill will. He doesn't steal or covet. He is helpful. We make these, we perceive this. We make these conceptual distinctions when we see Buddhist activity, a Buddha. But from the side of the Buddha, he's just doing what there is to do.

[06:33]

Got up in the morning, and he's proceeding with his day, or her day. So from the side of the Buddha, or the realized one, we run into them every day, and we are them every day, on and off. We would be described by someone else in this way. side when we are realized in that moment, we make no such distinctions. We don't perceive the situation in that way. Now, a child runs into the traffic. We don't conceptualize the situation, enter it into our PDA. We just act, right? And self-concern is magically dropped in that moment.

[07:36]

The ego is non-functional. Our body moves wonderfully. Our eyes see and we hear and we have total alertness in this samadhi in that moment. And we do what needs to be done. Buddha nature is manifest right then. In that moment, Buddha appears. Buddha appears when you manifest Buddha. You're sort of going in and out of existence all the time, sort of like subatomic particles. But it's up to us. So it's... Buddha nature is manifested in that moment. And there's sort of concentration, joy, unity, wholehearted dynamic action.

[08:43]

This is a description that the person sitting over there would say was happening. Now, although Buddha nature is abundantly present in everyone and all beings, in order to manifest it, we must practice. Now, saving the child is not practice. In some sense, you don't save the child. That's the story of the observer. The journalist who wants to write the story. Oh, he saved the child. The hero. on the front page of the Chronicle. And we've all seen the hero being interviewed, right?

[09:45]

Standing there, confused. When asked the question, why and how did you do that? How does it feel? And what does he say or she say? I don't know. I just did what happened. or something to that, and seemed a little bit uncomfortable with the whole searchlight on him. In some sense, they weren't even there when it happened. They disappeared into it, the hero. But more to the point, I think, as Dogen says, the practice It's not saving the child. But it's moment-to-moment awareness of our self-concern and open-hearted acknowledgement of our need for help.

[10:50]

And that's our practice. And then everything else just happens. The universe unfolds. And we're there. Now how do you practice with self-concern or suffering? Well, awareness is recommended. Awareness itself, some say, is the transforming act. practice awareness of our suffering, our attachments, our conditioning. But how does it become like saving a child? Well, can we practice awareness of self-concern without self-concern? Or to put it another way, to practice awareness of suffering without suffering.

[12:00]

We tend to pull away from our suffering, don't we? We distract ourselves. We medicate ourselves. But direct acknowledgement of the details of our life is recommended. This helps for liberation. One develops a new relationship with our self-concern. It's kind of interesting, your self-concern. It's kind of like awkward maybe, but why not investigate it? I think it's what all the plays and songs are about, poetry, about our self-concern. It's wonderful. And that's the way we overcome it.

[13:06]

That's hard, though, because the very impulse to overcome it is the cause of it. It could be the root of our self-concern. What a bind. What a pickle we're in. Plus if we want to get rid of it. Now our central practice is zazen, a practice of awareness and presence. Now zazen is neither a religious activity nor a good thing. Ideally it's done without calculation, without what is called gaining idea. Now a gaining idea may arise in Zazen, but ideally it becomes an object of pure love.

[14:16]

We don't reject it or reach for it or try to fix it. We let it be, let it live. We take care of it. Just be like a mother taking care of its only child. Just now, that child, I think the mother has more than one, but maybe just one at a time, one thing at a time, one dime at a time. Just now it's called, your child is called gaining idea. How wonderful. that this courageous little toddler will actually come out in the light. It's shy, you know. Gaining idea likes to sort of lurk in the shadows, peeping out. You have to kind of attract it.

[15:19]

It thinks you're going to slap it or something. Well, there you are, gaining idea. How timid and how innocent it really is. Let it run to its mother's arms for consolation, if it gets frightened. Gaining idea, or as the Tibetans call it, the self-grasping eye habit. Don't you like that? The self-grasping eye habit. I wish you could have a little t-shirt with that on it. I was thinking how mothers will sometimes have an arrow, baby within. Self-grasping, I have it. It needs to be loved, hugged, and acknowledged like the rest of us. We've been taking care of a bird. The neighbor has a bird.

[16:23]

Not a parakeet, but I'll think of it. It sings a lot. It's in a cage. What? Not a canary. What? Cockatiel. Cockatiel. And so Jerry goes to Europe and he brings the cage over with the bird in it. And we have a place and we watch the bird. We take care of the bird. Now at first the bird's real jumpy. And hisses and pecks, you know, especially if you come near it. Now, we have to come near the bird because we have to feed, you know, get in the cage, clean the cage, feed the bird. And I try to relate to the bird, actually. And here I come trying to help, you know, trying to help the bird.

[17:29]

And it hisses at me. It pecks at me. And I notice a small flash of resentment arising in me. When this happens, there is. I notice this is a way you can practice. If you know something's going to happen, especially you can sort of notice it. There it is. I studied my reaction and tried to Resist the temptation to dominate the bird. I mean, if it's just a little bird. We tell the kids not to frighten the animals. Don't move suddenly and poke your finger. I know you love them, we say, but see if you can find a way to gain permission from the animal. a little bit of permission as you move in.

[18:32]

You know, the animal's trying, too. The bird's relating to you, you're relating to the bird. I mean, it's not you trying to get the bird to do something. The bird is, and you're in together. There's a little dance going on. It's just you're a lot bigger. The bird's trying. And both of you, with a little bit of patience, little mindfulness. Birds are very mindful. Very, very mindful a bird is and a dog is. Animals, I think, are very mindful. But you don't move in all at once. Or maybe let it go. We tell the kids, let it go for now. Come back. Try it later. Most of all, try to be aware of your feelings and what's coming up for you when you're in this space with the bird, because the bird is definitely being aware of it. Now, after a few weeks, been a few weeks, Jerry's back now.

[19:40]

He hasn't come over to get the bird. I wonder why. But after a few weeks, finally the bird is on my shoulder. I got moved to that point. And while I'm washing the dishes. But there's still hissing and resentment going on to some degree. Now this is how we can help Jake, it's the name of the bird, did I say that? The self-grasping eye habit, I think, of Jake is. My self-grasping eye habit. To help him come out of the cage and participate and take its rightful place in the light. Now some say that liberation is to let go of all attachment, to drop our self-concern, letting go our obsessions and judgments and yada-da-da, that then we'll be standing before the door of absolute freedom.

[20:44]

To drop at long last the burden of hope and fear. To set it down. Perhaps we agree with this, but despite our earnest effort, what happens? We are still beset with the same familiar difficulties. What do you do? Well, you try various things. I don't know, what have you done? Some people think, well, I think I'll study Buddhism. Now, I'm old enough to remember when There were just a few Buddhist books on the shelf. They didn't even have a shelf that said Buddhism. It was like, what, Oriental religions or something. It was okay to say Oriental back then. Now there's many every month.

[21:53]

One day a person asked, sitting right over there, I remember, She said, I just read book after book, and there are more books, and then there are all these retreats, and I seem to be falling further and further behind, and my self-concern is getting deeper and deeper. What shall I do? Now, it's true, these books are very interesting. and enticing. Teachings are impelling and captivating. And there are so many interesting treats, don't you say? Zen of this and Zen of that. What shall I do, she asks. Now the situation is a little reminiscent of the realm of the hungry ghosts, I don't know. The Tibetans have enumerated these six realms,

[23:01]

mental states that we pass in and out of during today, really. There are the heavenly realms. Those are nice. Sometimes we're in the heavenly realm. For a while, even. At the national level, it's sort of like the real estate bubble. You know, there's just an infinite amount of money. Buy houses with nothing down. borrow on the houses you're buying with nothing down and buy something else and then go on vacation. It's wonderful. Wasn't that wonderful? That's the heavenly realm, one of the heavenly realms. Endless pleasure and wealth without the appropriate effort. Then there is the realm of the fighting giants.

[24:04]

This is another one of the heavenly realms. This could be a lot of fun if you're winning. Now it seems worth slipping a little bit in that area too. It's too bad, the bubble and slipping in the realm of the giants, the fighting giants. When the bubble bursts and the fighting goes badly, we may drop into the hell realms. And Suzuki Roshi used to say, oh, the heavenly realms are wonderful. But, you know, you fall. Everything's impermanent, right? Obviously, we can see how the economic, political systems work. It's nice for, then you're in the doldrums. One of these low realms is called the hungry ghosts. I'm reminded of this woman. They're depicted as having very large eyes. and a ravenous appetite, but a very narrow throat.

[25:09]

They see the objects of their desire, or we see our objects of desire, but we can't get it down fast enough. We're just shoveling it in, finding new ways to increase access to it. The food they get down, isn't totally satisfying. So there's more and more and more. And there are other hell realms. What do they all have in common? Well, a number of things. One is very little concern for the welfare of others. There's complete self-involvement. And no tendency to practice or to hear the Dharma. After all, who needs it in the heaven realm? You know, it's just bliss.

[26:13]

Trouble is, well, you know. And when we're in the lower realms, in the hell realm, we're so torn asunder. by difficulty. We can hardly practice. We don't even think of practice. We just want it to stop. What a pickle. How do you get out of that predicament? Of course, it'll take care of itself. Or you can do something about it. Well, you actually can't do anything about it. Fortunately, everything's impermanent. Our hungry ghost practitioner devoured book after book, retreat after retreat, said, well, what can I do? Now, when she said that, when she noticed the problem, oh, this is a problem.

[27:23]

What can I do, she asked. At that moment, she said, escaped from the hungry ghost realm and moved into the human realm just the realization of what realm you're in that awareness that moment of awareness and you're in the human realm now you can practice i don't know how long you're going to be there so uh you know started working on it while the light's on you know take the opportunity do what you can because you're going to be back and the hell realms and the heaven realms before you can shake a stick. Take the opportunity to practice when you can. Now, the Buddha, you know, she asked, well, what can I do? Now, the Buddha might have said, you know, I don't know why,

[28:29]

I hope he doesn't mind my speculating about what he might have said. He might have said, close the books, cancel the workshops, and find a way to help somebody. Now it seems that when we're involved in what some observer might call helping somebody, We seem to become free in a moment from our nagging self-concern. In the moment of true helpfulness, the person is free for a moment from their ego. There may be a kind of full functioning uncovered by self-concern. And you're there.

[29:32]

It's great. You feel it, right? You've done it. It happens accidentally every now and then. But it doesn't seem to relate to anything else. It's just what it is. Now this is a person being manifested as Buddha right then. In the moment. We have such moments. But we may not remember them. Today, you have such money. Pass the salt. You just passed the salt. You're even thankful that somebody asked, right? Oh, I can do something useful. I think I'll pass. This is great. And there's like an interaction between you and another sentient being. There's a night. Human nature. Helpfulness.

[30:32]

There's something fulfilling about being helpful and of service, if you happen to run into it. It's hard to put your finger at what it is. I suggest you study it, but it's good work if you can get it. A lot of people are searching for ways to do this, but for some reason we're sort of defeated. Find ways to be helpful. And my wife was discussing this with her, and she was brought up in a Boston family that where helpfulness was taught. Service was taught. Our father used to say, we are here to serve, not to rule. We are here to serve, not to rule. And

[31:38]

Her mother was the originator of the American Epileptic Society. Martha has been involved in lots of different services. She's one of the founders of Zen Hospice. And I asked her, why do people volunteer for Zen Hospice? Are any hospice volunteers in here? Oh. Hi. And she thought of it, and they reported a number of different reasons. But she said the main thing that she remembers and knows is that they report that it was a wonderfully meaningful part of their life. Somehow they were fulfilled sitting at the bed of a dying person for this as a volunteer.

[32:50]

Deeply rewarding. I remember when I went out on my first date with Martha where I made a picnic and we're going over to the Golden Gate Park, and we're going across the bridge, and she says, do you think we have enough time to stop by and see a dying person? I wasn't expecting that. Why is the Bodhisattva, this is the person, a helpful person? Helpful. Why are they helpful? As we define a bodhisattva as perhaps a helpful person. I submit that it's not because the bodhisattva is good as opposed to bad, but that he finds helpfulness fulfilling, almost addicting, deeply rewarding and meaningful.

[33:56]

And that he is not special in this. It's human nature. available and in everyone. We just need to find a way. At first it's hard. I mean, what do you do? You have to kind of sit with it. But gradually, we fall into the pull of its attractive force. Sort of like, we fall, at first it's uphill. Because we're, you know, But as we get up there, we reach a point where all of a sudden it's downhill. We're getting energy. What a gift to run into the opportunity to have such a life-affirming event. And this is where giving is receiving.

[35:02]

Perhaps we've heard that. The Dalai Lama used to say, or says probably, that if people knew the great personal fulfillment and reward they got from altruistic behavior, you couldn't stop them. Here they come. Now there's a coming-of-age program at Green Gulch, starting today, actually. This is celebrating and honoring the transition of a young person into adulthood or young adulthood. Usually they're around 12 or 13 years old. So like a bar mitzvah in the Jewish religion. Very important, a time of life to recognize and celebrate and acknowledge. And an important part of these events is the teaching of helpfulness.

[36:13]

You think, oh, really? Yeah. You decide on a project of service, of helpfulness, and you do that project. And then you report on it during your bar mitzvah. or your coming of age. What a good idea, I think, to introduce the child. And I'm sure this has been going on earlier. But I would say, in terms of my own upbringing, I had nice parents, but they never mentioned service or helpfulness to me. Totally, not alien, but of course it's a good idea, but, you know, It wasn't part of what I was doing. Although I think I am helpful upon occasion, but I don't. I didn't think of it as worthwhile or something to pursue.

[37:19]

It just happens every now and then. But if you can provide an experience for a child where they can experience the rewards of it, The fulfillment of it, like the bodhisattva, feels fulfilled. Then you say, oh, I like that. I think I'll do more of that. This is a good way to live. It's a challenge to figure it out, but that's why we have our brains and our heart. So... Why don't we try to find a way to be helpful? Or notice. How about notice? Notice what we are. Because we are all the time helpful. Or maybe don't do that. Don't be too self-conscious.

[38:22]

Not a bad idea to take out a little project, you know. of service think about it it could be just calling up someone acknowledging someone opening your heart somewhere I don't know I'm just thinking right now about it reading to someone tutoring someone taking care of plants Be helpful. Not because it's good, but because it's your nature. And when we act as our nature, we are fulfilled. Now I'm going to read you a little story for a short story that was in the New York Times

[39:28]

Magazine section. What are the whales trying to tell us? You seen this? What are the whales? This is a gray whale off the coast down here. What are they trying to tell us? It's a long article. I just read a couple of paragraphs. I recently wrote up. A female humpback whale was spotted in December 2005 east of the Farallon Islands, just off the coast of San Francisco. She was entangled in a web of crab trap lines, hundreds of yards of nylon rope that had become wrapped around her mouth, torso, and tail, The weight of the traps caused her to struggle to stay afloat.

[40:36]

A rescue team arrived within a few hours and decided that the only way to save her was to dive in and cut her loose. For an hour they cut at the lines and the rope with curved knives. all the while trying to steer clear of a tail they knew could kill them with one swipe. When the whale was finally freed, the divers said she swam around them for a while in what appeared to be joyous circles. She then came back and visited with each one of them, nudging them gently as if in thanks. The divers said it was the most beautiful experience they had ever had.

[41:40]

As for the diver who cut free the rope that was entangling the whale's mouth, A huge eye was following him the entire time. And he said that he will never be the same.

[42:05]

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