This podcast is offered by the San Francisco Zen Center on the web at www.sfzc.org. Our public programs are made possible by donations from people like you. Good evening. Hi, my name is Greg Fain, and I'm the Tonto, or Head of Practice, at Tassajara. I would like to begin by thanking and acknowledging my teacher, Sozin Mel Weitzman Roshi, the abbot of Berkeley Zen Center. And to say that this talk is just to encourage you in your practice. That's my intention tonight. Today is the ninth practice period, ended on the fourth.

[01:06]

Yesterday, I passed a new student on the path who just come to Tassajara for the first time. So two days, maybe not quite two days in Tassahara, I said, so first impressions? And she said, well, I think it's just the best thing ever. And I'm almost 10 years at Tassahara, and I concur wholeheartedly. Best thing ever. I always say guest season is best season. But really, you know, every season is best season. During the practice period, on the day before personal day, unless you're on the kitchen crew, everyone in the practice period has the same personal day.

[02:24]

It's four and nine days are traditionally, you know, day off, personal day. The day before personal day, work ends a little early and we have room cleaning time. And it's like a half hour where everyone in the practice period just mobs on the cleaning supplies and we all clean our rooms. And I think I was in some kind of meeting with Linda and Leslie. And Leslie said, well, it's almost room cleaning time. I adore room cleaning. I love it. And Leslie said, well, it's almost room cleaning time, which is Greg's favorite thing, along with everything else. So I asked the Eno to print up some copies of the refuges in Pali and offer those to everybody because the first night when we chanted the refuges, it was clearly audible to me.

[03:46]

Of course, a lot of the continuing monks have gone on vacation and welcome back. A lot of the continuing monks, welcome back. A lot of them are back now. Anyway, we're chanting the refuges. What are we doing? Yeah. We're taking refuge. And thank you, Curtis, for your work circle announcement today. Taking refuge in Buddha, Dharma, and Sangha in the Pali language. It's a dead language. It's the first language that Buddhist teachings were written down in. So the oldest teachings, the connected discourses, the middle, those teachings, sometimes referred to as the Pali canon, because they were written in Pali. It's the language older than Sanskrit.

[04:47]

So we chant the refuges in this ancient language of Pali, sort of, as a... as a way of honoring our ancient way. This is not something they do in Japan. Actually, it was introduced to Zen Center by Reverend Ananda Dahlenberg, who probably not very many people here remember, but I do. I took a class with him in the 70s at City Center. And he was a really sweet guy. And he was also responsible for I think largely responsible, maybe not solely, but largely responsible for Zen Center acquiring City Center on the corner of Page and Laguna. And that was a good move. Anyway, Ananda thought, I wonder if we could do this. And we started doing it. Now it's like it would be unthinkable not to chant the refuges in Pali. It's like our lullaby every night, year round, year round.

[05:53]

We always chant the refuges in Pali. Sometimes during guest season, guests just hang out outside the zendo, waiting for the end of zazen so they can listen, which I think is so sweet. So yeah, as Reverend Curtis explained, it's very simple. The translation is just, I take refuge in Buddha. I take refuge in Dharma. I take refuge in Sangha for a second time. I take refuge in Buddha, Dharma, Sangha. And then for a third time. So that's it. That's the translation. It's not really complicated. Three times around taking refuge in the triple treasure. The way I like to think about taking refuge in Buddhadharma and Sangha?

[06:56]

Well, I think about it in a lot of different ways. First off, I think I believe you don't have to believe anything to take refuge in Buddhadharma and Sangha. You don't have to believe in anything. It's not like a testament of faith or a catechism or something like that. It's just something we do. There's lots of ways to understand taking refuge in Buddha, Dharma, and Sangha. The Buddha is the awakened one. You could say, that guy, that guy, what he did, I'm on board with that. Or you could say, awakening, the possibility of awakening. Buddha means the awakened one. The Buddha way is the way of waking up.

[07:59]

There isn't really such a word as Buddhism in the Far East. They say buddhata or Buddha way or butsudo. That Buddhism, no, it's kind of a Western neologism. So the possibility of waking up, the truth of waking up, That's one way of looking at it. Dharma is law, teaching, truth, accumulated wisdom. Our library here in Tassajara is very small, but it happens to be one of the best collections of Buddhist teachings, scripture, sutras, commentaries both ancient and modern that you'll find in almost anywhere it's small but it's really concentrated that's a great library so if you're summer students I hope you take advantage of it and you know the Sangha is all of us the community practicing together and

[09:25]

sharing sharing practice sharing understanding and sharing being mirrors for each other multiple mirrors you know if you're in a intimate relationship you know maybe you and one person are like mirrors for each other but in a Sangha in a community there's many mirrors so you get you get the sort of many-sided view of yourself, what you are to other people and what other people are to you. And it's healthy. It's healthy. You're not limited too much. So that's very helpful if you're trying to wake up, if you're trying to see the truth as Sojin Roshi

[10:27]

said to Blanche, and she was asking him what was the big deal about Tassajara. He said, well, I guess at Tassajara, everybody can see your stuff, so you might as well see it too. So it works like that. It works like that. But I wanted to talk about, in particular, taking refuge in Buddha. And one way, I understand that, one way that it could be understood or talked about Taking Refuge in Buddha, Taking Refuge in Awakening, which is Enacting Buddha. This book, The Wholehearted Way, I highly recommend. It's a wonderful book. Translation of Dogen's Bendowa. Bendowa meaning A Talk on the Wholehearted Practice of the Way. This is a translation of the essay and commentary by Uchiyama Roshi, a 20th century Zen master, Shohako Kumura's teacher.

[11:39]

So Uchiyama Roshi says, One minute of zazen is one minute of Buddha. Your first zazen is your first sitting Buddha. That is good zazen. You don't need to accumulate experiences to do true zazen. So I think that's a pretty good understanding. I like that a lot. Of course, Uchiyama Roshi is not the first person to have said one minute of zazen is one minute of Buddha. Lots of Zen masters have said that. It's almost a cliche. It's very commonplace. You know... the centuries there have been many carved images of shakyamuni buddha similar to this one this one very very old i think nobody's really clear how many centuries old it is but it comes from uh gandharan civilization where present-day afghanistan is where the taliban blew up those giant buddhas uh so it's quite old um and i think

[12:57]

you always see the Buddha sitting in this cross-legged posture. Because back in the day, they didn't have instructional videos. They said, do this. See what he's doing? Do like that. Do like that. Just sit upright. This guy here, he's got pretty good posture. I like that. He's got good posture. Yeah. So just to take up this posture, This is kind of a radical teaching of Zen school. Just to take up this posture is to enact Buddha's mind immediately. Interesting prospect. What do we think of that? In the essay of fascicle, we say, Dogen wrote.

[13:58]

There's a Q&A part where this question is proposed. There are many gates into the Buddha Dharma. Why do you put so much emphasis on Zazen? Master Dogen says that Zazen is the front gate. I emphasize zazen because it's the front gate to Buddha Dharma. I like that. It's the front gate. Those of you continuing monks who were here for the last practice period may recall in the sashim, I talked about that a little bit when I was invited to do some encouraging words. I said zazen is the front gate. It's obvious. right here. It's immediately accessible.

[15:01]

When you take up this posture, when you do this practice, you are immediately accessing Buddha's mind. And I said something like, the front gate is wide open and brightly illuminated, meaning It's obvious. It's right here. Take advantage of it. I'm a very visual person, so I kind of had this image, if you will, of like a Las Vegas sign. Buddha, Buddha, Buddha. Wide open, brightly illuminated. Enter here. Enter here. Or maybe it's the kind of sign that goes back and forth. Buddha. Zazen. Buddha. Zazen. You know?

[16:04]

Yeah. Get a little picture of that. Yeah. Zazen means seated meditation. Sometimes we say shikantaza or just sitting. As I said in a vertical announcement, All the great ones over the centuries have just emphasized posture and breathing above all. You don't have to sit full lotus or half lotus, but a stable seated position could be in a chair, could be on a seizo bench, could be lots of things. But stability and upright. yoga of this posture and i use the word yoga in in the sort of overall sense of yoga and also in sense of hatha yoga because this practice is very physical it's body practice body body body just enacting buddha's mind with this body

[17:24]

just posture and breathing. If you want to think of it as a yoga class where you do the same asana for 40 minutes, that's fine. It's a balanced pose. Zazen is a balanced pose. Dogen Zenji said in Fukanza Zangi, he says, you know, neither leaning to the left nor to the right, neither forward nor backward. And then he also says ears in line with the shoulders. and nose in line with the navel, that's a hard one. The ears in line with the shoulders in particular is a hard one for a lot of people. Many of us go around life leading with our forebrains. Just watch. Anywhere where there's a crowd of people, an airport or whatnot, just look around. You'll see a lot of people like this. walk around the zendo doing postural adjustments, I see a lot of that myself.

[18:30]

I see a lot of this. What are you thinking about? What are you thinking about? There's actually in another book by Uchiyama Roshi called Opening the Hand of Thought. He talks about sculpture by Auguste Rodin, the thinker. Everyone knows the sculpture. like this. He's thinking so hard, he's got to hold his head up with his arm. He's just thinking it over, ruminating, you know? That's the posture of rumination. That's the posture of thinking it over. And upright sitting, upright spine. We say lift up to the back of the crown of your head, ears in line with your shoulders. We say sit upright as though to touch the ceiling with the crown of your head. This is the posture of mirror mind, just reflecting, just being present with what is.

[19:34]

So the balance posture is also a balance between effort and non-effort. So there's this quiet, continuous muscular effort of lifting up. In fact, when you first sit down, you can even lift and feel the space between your vertebra. And you can feel a lift in your sternum. Let your shoulder blades slide down your back. Roll your shoulders back. Bring your ears in line with your shoulders. And this is sort of quiet, consistent, muscular exertion, which is counterbalanced by force of gravity. The pull of the earth is helping you settle, allowing that, and lining up your skeleton so that it's a perfect scaffolding. So you can relax within it.

[20:42]

There's this balance between exertion and relaxation, sort of dynamic stasis. between these two actions, action and non-action, and between doing and non-doing. So this is not theory. We say Zen practice. We can talk about how to do Zazen, but the important thing is to do it. So this practice is based on experience. It's experiential. Based on experience and observation. Investigation. Sometimes when I teach Sazen Instruction, I say the Zendo is Samadhi Lab. It's the lab course in Buddhism where you try it out.

[21:46]

You don't have to believe in anything. You don't have to take up some philosophy. You can just try it out if you want to. This is taking refuge in Buddha. Just see what happens. My zazen instruction in five words, stay present for what arises. Whatever happens. Stay present. Stay present for what arises. This is awareness. This is waking up. When I teach Zaza and Instruction, I usually spend a lot of time talking about posture and breathing, being present with the breath, using breath as a way to be present, and very little time talking about the mind.

[22:48]

A lot of people want to talk about the mind. What do you do? What do you do with your mind? What goes on with the mind? That's kind of far out. It's kind of like, yeah, let's talk about the real Zen. I don't want to talk about my body. So Dogen, again, in his Zazen Instruction, the Fukansa Zengi, he says, you should therefore cease from practice based on intellectual understanding Pursuing words and following after speech. Learn the backwards step that turns your light inwardly to illuminate yourself. Whoa. Now that's some interesting practice instruction. I want to try that. I want to try that. What does that mean? What do you think that means? I'll tell you what I think it means. I think turning the light inwardly means presence. It means awareness. Simply presence.

[23:50]

And there's a subtle art of letting go. Stay present for what arises. Why it's a subtle art is we get so hung up on doing it right. Oh, yes, we do. Do I look good? Do I have the right clothes? Do I know the right lingo? Am I talking to the right people? Okay, those are pretty superficial, but we can get very sophisticated versions of all that. Comparing ourselves to others. Judging the quality of our zazen experience. Judging the quality of our samadhi. You know, good, bad, indifferent, sleepy, awakeful. Yeah. No. Actually, no.

[24:51]

And usually, without doubt, we judge it and we're lacking, right? We say, yeah, well, my practice is just terrible. And I don't match up to that person over there or that one looks so good and that one is just sitting so quietly. Generally, that's the case. Sometimes some people say, oh, I'm the best. But not usually. A great Zen master, Zouketsu Norman Fisher, said, the problem for most Dharma students with the whole idea of turning the mind around, etc., etc., is that it sounds too much like a job. Also, it sounds sexy and profound. These three together, a sexy and profound practice that I can accomplish if I am good enough, though probably I am not. is a deadly idea for most Dharma students.

[25:52]

The idea that there is something to accomplish in seated meditation is, I think, something that practitioners must have been grappling with, must be grappling with, and have been since the time of the Buddha. I think so. It's really, really difficult not to add something to your experience. That's why I say it's a subtle art. But I'm here to tell you it's not about accomplishing something. It's not about getting. It's about giving. Presence is very generous. Presence involves letting go. You have to be generous.

[26:56]

What's the most generous thing you can do? What's the best thing you can give somebody? Your presence, your attention. That's the best gift that you can give to anybody. And it's also the best gift that you can give to yourself. When you think about it, you agree. So Suzuki Roshi gave a talk here in July 1971 where he talked about this and he talked about not being selfish and and how when we do this practice, little by little, without really noticing or consciously doing anything about it, little by little, small mind becomes less important.

[28:10]

And what he called big mind, or you could also call Buddha mind, becomes a bigger part of the picture. little by little you don't even necessarily notice but seems to happen gradually we can make more room for what matters and we can begin to recognize petty self-concern as petty self-concern without getting all judgy about it. That's the tricky part. Maybe have a sense of humor about it. Oh my gosh, I am so selfish. Wow. When I think about it, unbelievable, I am so selfish.

[29:16]

Have a little lightness about it, a little humor. Okay. Suzuki Roshi, in this talk he gave, he has a lot of fun. He's talking about the difference between priest and lay. And he says, I think that priests are more selfish. Priests have a bigger problem. Lay people can let go easily because they can say, I don't know. And priests feel like they should know. They should know and they should have an opinion and they should say something that sounds wise. Little by little, you can make more room, allow more room for what matters. Allow more room for Big mind. And it just happens.

[30:21]

You can trust that it just happens, actually. You don't have to make it happen. And what's more, you can't make it happen. You can't. So my teacher, Sojourner Roshi, always says, trust Zazen. You can just trust it. But don't take my word for it. Find out for yourself. If you want to. 20th century Zen master Koto Sawaki said, we don't practice zazen to get enlightened. We practice zazen being told every which way by enlightenment. That's the way to practice. So here's Suzuki Roshi at length from this talk I'm talking about. in July of 1971. You may wonder why you know you are staying at Tazahara and practicing Zazen.

[31:28]

That's true. You may wonder that. You may wonder why you are staying at Tazahara and practicing Zazen. It is to digest your knowledge or experience, your Zazen experience, to completely extend your realization to your everyday life. The rules we follow are set up so that you can extend the Buddhist way of life in our usual everyday life. The way you eat here, the way you recite sutras, is how to extend your realization to your everyday activity. Even though you feel it is difficult, actually more and more you will do this. And eventually what you will do will help people, even though you do not try to help people. This is a very important point in our practice. When you come to this point, there is no Buddha, there's no layman, there's no priest, there is no teaching. Because you have it, nothing special exists. And you are actually always one with people, one with your friend, one with your Buddha, when you extend your practice fully in your everyday life.

[32:37]

So when we say, no Buddha, sometimes a Zen master may say, no Buddha, kill Buddha. What does it mean? What it means is to be completely one with Buddha. It doesn't need Buddha anymore. He himself is Buddha. How you reach this kind of attainment is through your practice. So, to be completely one with Buddha is to completely take refuge in Buddha. Trust Sazen. My best advice for practicing at Tazahara is don't worry about it. Just don't worry about it. Just take Suzuki Roshi's advice. Just follow the schedule and see what happens.

[33:39]

Experience what's on offer and see what happens. In my opinion, about 99% of taking the backward step that turns the light and shines it inwardly is showing up to your cushion. So just keep showing up to your cushion. Right here in the Shobo Genzo Zui Mon Ki, which is some... Dharma talks that Dogen gave that were written down by his disciple, Kuan Ejo. Master Dogen says, now each of you should practice exclusively and wholeheartedly. Ten out of ten of you will attain the way. My late master Tendo encouraged us in this way. Okay? So there you have it. Dogen said it. Ten out of ten of you, ten out of ten of you,

[34:46]

will attain the way. So don't worry about it. Thank you very much for your attention. There's a minute or two if anyone has a question. I'd be happy to entertain that. Yes, need. think Dogen was saying either one. As I understand it, my limited understanding, I think the thrust of his teaching is that practice and enlightenment arise together.

[35:48]

This was kind of his lifelong koan. It's his sort of spiritual knot. that he worked with his entire life. Because when he was a young boy, he was a young monk, he studied the Lotus Sutra a lot. The Lotus Sutra said, everyone is already perfectly innately endowed with Buddha nature. And he said, I'm on board with that. Great. I believe that. So what's the problem? Why is everyone practicing so hard? question so sort of his resolution to that was that actually practice and enlightenment arise together there's no enlightenment without practice there's no there's no Buddha without actualizing it so this is the actualization

[36:56]

the enactment, if you will, of your innate enlightened mind. They go together. You can't separate them. Yes, no? Maybe? Okay. All right, then. Thank you very much for your attention, everyone. Please enjoy the practice. And I guess I would like to say, in closing, thank you to all the work period people who come every work period. It's really amazing to host you and amazing to see big parts of Tassahara get torn up.

[37:57]

taken apart and put back together again better. It's so beautiful, and it's such an excellent example of the enactment of practice, act of love. It's love, clearly. I was talking to Francis this morning, and he said, it's amazing. All these people come. They work really hard. do all this for us, and then they leave, and on their way out, they thank us in Work Circle. They thank us. That's funny. So thank you. Thank you all. Thank you all for your dedication and your love. Good night. Thank you for listening to this podcast offered by the San Francisco Zen Center. Our Dharma Talks are offered free of charge, and this is made possible by the donations we receive.

[38:59]

Your financial support helps us to continue to offer the Dharma. For more information, visit sfcc.org and click Giving.

[39:09]

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