This podcast is offered by the San Francisco Zen Center on the web at www.sfzz.org. Our public programs are made possible by donations from people like you. Good morning. In our journey through Shenzhen Jakudo, we've reached this point. After we've established through sympathetic communication with the truth, the Bodhi mind, we take refuge in the great truth of the Buddha patriarchs and learn the concrete actions which are the establishment of Bodhi mind. arouse the intention, the practice.

[01:17]

Wonderfully, it turns into what does practice ask of me? Calls forth in both call and response to what's happening now. Both as a disposition, an act of commitment, dedication, involvement, And then entering, as this translation says, the concrete actions. Kaz Tanahashi translates it just as the practice.

[02:27]

Another translation says, explore the daily functioning. No, he didn't. He said, after resonating with the way, arising the aspiration for enlightenment, take refuge in the great way of Buddha ancestors. He's from the Bay Area. Shall we pretend there wasn't patriarchy in Dogen's time? sympathetic communion this interbeing sometimes the activity the event is obvious and the conclusion or the learning is mysterious sometimes

[03:57]

The learning, the event is mysterious and the learning is obvious. The shafts of warm sunlight flickering through the chilly stillness of the morning touching us, drawing us into communion, to interaction. And what's the learning? Yesterday, after we chanted Kansayan, as I was walking back to the abbot's cabin, two deer,

[04:59]

wandering just over the bridge, enjoying the quiet of the afternoon when all those humans were sequestered in their little house. look of soft intimacy in their eyes. Something in us learns. What exactly we learn? How lovely that it has an element of mystery. That it touches our heart before our mind gets busy chopping it into concrete blocks of concepts and opinions.

[06:11]

And how gracious that as we continue in this way, Something is nurtured. William Stafford talked about it like this, or wrote about it like this. He says, you and art, your exact errors make a music that nobody hears. Your straying feet find the great dance walking alone. you live on a world where stumbling always leads home year after year fits over your face when there was youth your talent was youth later you find your way by touch where moss redeems the stone and you discover where music begins

[07:29]

before it makes any sound far in the mountains where canyons go still as they always falling ever knew flakes of snow Maybe we wish that all this happened in the midst of serene mind and body infused with qi, sitting with great ease. Will not be nice. And yet, As we pay attention, we see something is stirring, something is shifting.

[08:38]

Despite the great urgencies that arise in our thoughts and feelings, something else is coming into consciousness or being noticed. that it was always in consciousness for our appreciation. And what shall we take refuge in? Shall we take refuge in that still reverberating ancient pain and hurt or shall we take refuge in the soft look of the deer's eyes? I walked towards him and stood there and looked at me, and I thought, hmm, okay, let's see how long this goes on.

[09:45]

At a certain point, at their own speed, they walked up to where the caissando is, down into the creek bed, and stopped and looked back. where was I going at that moment? And what was I planning to do there? What great important thing, part of this schedule, was I virtuously upholding? We take refuge in awakening. take refuge in that which draws forth the vitality and expresses what is in the moment.

[10:56]

It's not a denial of our pain. It's not a denial of those lingering and persistent thought, feelings, images, memories, anticipations. that as the clamor of that starts to settle something else becomes evident it's as if everything around this is vibrant with awakening and it's holding out its hand and saying come on come on you'll be okay take refuge in Buddha.

[12:07]

How easy it is to let that mean nothing. Yeah, that's what we say here. What is it to let it mean everything? is it to let it crack open the deep habits of thought and feeling and let something breathe deeply is it to trust that in this path of practice we've all somehow become part of there is awakening there is liberation there is cessation of suffering there is the profound nourishment of interbeing

[13:37]

the intimacy that our heart yearns for, and that our mind and heart in its preoccupation and pain hold separate from. What is it to take refuge? what is it to take refuge in Dharma this living this interbeing even our own pain and stubbornness as we cling to whatever the heck it is we're clinging to all of that

[14:43]

when seeing with a mind that says, is that so? With a heart that finds within its dukkah some sukkah, finds within the contraction some space. the do the contraction the sue the opening the softening the space that is the poet says as William Stafford says your exact errors become music your stumbling becomes a dance.

[15:51]

The persistent wandering of mind becomes an illustration of how thought can be grasped turns into a concept, concept becomes substantial, is imbued with emotion, psychological significance, creates a whole world. And there you are, within it, without an alternative. What is it to say? Within that world, within that construct, there is teachings of the path of liberation.

[17:03]

There is compassion for that suffering. There is wisdom that can see this coming into being and then experiencing it letting its energy be experienced and not grasping so tightly to its constructs to take refuge in Dharma Call them what you like. Patriarchs, matriarchs, ancestors, grateful, perennial wisdom, the experience of the moment.

[18:14]

What is it? in a learning mode. Sometimes even just ask after you've gone through one of your great dramas and mysteriously survived. What did I learn from that? What was the teaching? may be what happened and what is it to practice with it how does that whatever it was whatever it is how does it become a card an obvious example of what is

[19:26]

an obvious illustration of what is. What did I learn from that? To take refuge in Dharma. And to see in its interbeing mind that creates the solidity of knowing. How do these two interplay? How is learning similar to knowing and quite opposite to knowing? Bodhidharma saying to the emperor, not knowing or more exactly saying not re-cognizing the experience in a moment in a fraction of a second the sound of the creek actually just sound but mind cognizes

[21:04]

in flash can that to be just the flash sound concept dependent co-arising unfolding or is it recognized is it recognized solid i know for a fact out there there's a creek and i'm sitting here hearing it and how the invitation into interbeing To just feel the quiet in the valley.

[22:14]

To just feel what it is to stand up after sitting for a long time. the setting settled there's a little reluctance sometimes if your mind and body are hurting like hell there's a great relief ah what a joy to have my legs straight you have the pain in my knees rapidly decrease being always offering a teaching sometimes we stand up after sitting and whatever that mysterious cloak of existence we'd wrapped ourselves in falls away

[23:45]

the aching body it had created, the way it had influenced or burdened the mind, the mysterious illusions to the past. Just stand up. And the world is simple. cave of emptiness carved out of a mountain of form. I take refuge in dharma. I take refuge in wonder.

[24:54]

I take refuge in not knowing. I take refuge in learning, discovery. And I take refuge in Sangha. Even the deer help me practice. Even the deer offering their example remind me. Even the deer with their eye-to-eye contact make evident we're in this together. when we're sitting machine you hear the footsteps sometimes we start to realize oh that's so-and-so that we've learned the sound of their footsteps

[26:22]

Could we do this alone? Sangha allows us to give over to interbeing. It allows us to support and be supported by our collective effort. allows each of us to take our role in the mandala. And then we give ourselves to it and it becomes... it becomes potent, it becomes influential. Sometimes it settles us down.

[27:53]

Sometimes it keeps us on track. Sometimes it energizes us. Sometimes it draws us into a state of being that we're kind of surprised at ourselves. Part of us is thinking, well, I'm not into all this liturgy and chanting and stuff. And then in the midst of chanting together, you find yourself enthralled and taking refuge in sangha. Dogen Zenji says, according to Nishajima's translation, learn the concrete actions which are the establishment of Bodhimad.

[29:10]

Kastanahashi says, devote yourself to the practice. Another translation says, from Shasta Abbey, explore the daily functioning chanting together. Sitting here can hear the west wing and the east wing. Sometimes they're together. Sometimes there's a little controversy as to which...

[30:17]

In my mind, I think maybe this is Green College speed. Maybe this is Tassajara speed. Maybe this is city center speed. Sometimes it's just a little hard to hear. This sense of unity, it's like when we're doing something. If you're the first to finish, you're probably going a little too fast. If you're the last to finish, you're probably going a little too slow. That's kind of our way. Probably. Pay attention.

[31:22]

If it's persistent, Hmm. Maybe make some adjustment. I hear certain things in the chanting, and I think, oh, I should comment on that. And then I think of this story, a student of Hirata Roshi, Hirata Roshi, Chodo, Roshi, told me. He said that one day in Sanzen, Hirata, Roshi said to him, you know, the way you're doing that, the way you're doing your vows is not correct. He says, that wasn't such a surprise. It was the fact that he waited

[32:26]

seven and a half years before he said anything. Will he do it the right way today? He's been bowing for a year. Two years. Okay, maybe I'll tell him. Hadigiri Roshi's name dined in. Great patience. To hold it, what we're doing in this great generosity of non-dualism. No success or failure.

[33:31]

And then to hold up the particularity. Because if we don't hold up the particularity, there's something about what's happening right now that's not being noticed and acknowledged. But we hold it up and we don't lose the generous mind. suchness these are all just constructs these are all just ideas more profoundly the teaching of the Diamond Sutra which says it like this because and it doesn't exist because it doesn't exist therefore we can say this exists perspective of the absolute from the perspective of not knowing not grasping onto particular ideas there is no right and wrong way to do what we do and that allows us to hold to a particular way of doing it

[35:02]

without getting stuck in right and wrong mind and the practical way we express that is dining great patience great patience with each other and great patience with ourself personally I'm charmed by this poet poem of William Stafford's. And then another part of me thinks, yeah, but maybe in terms of morning service, in terms of how we move around this space, make our best efforts to follow the guidelines we have. And then they interplay between the two.

[36:06]

The precision of our guidelines and the vagaries of our human existence. I would say to you, it's more fun when we earnestly try not to make a mistake. Then the mistake... It has its own majesty. It just stands out. Harada Roshi said to me once, he said, I love the way you made a mistake in service this morning. You chanted the wrong word, and then you didn't even hesitate. before you went on to the next one. And I thought, that guy doesn't miss anything.

[37:12]

And how these two, they become a lived interplay of form and emptiness. a lived interplay of this spark of kanodoko. A lived interplay of what it is to practice. Within the cosmology of Buddhism, not really part of the Zen way, but within the cosmology of Buddhism, more the pure land way, that in the pure land, our afflictions, our persistent clinging and aversion fall away.

[38:21]

In practice, it's just this free-flowing stream. But in the Zen way, We give that an interesting twist. We say, hmm, but maybe my afflictions offer their own contribution. Maybe my clinging offers its own dharma. And in Hatha Yoga, you discover that the Kanno Doko is at the point where you stretch and the body, the muscle energy, the muscle says, no way. I'm not going any further than that.

[39:27]

It starts to tighten. pause right there on that interface. And to let what you've learned about softening, to let what you've learned about opening come into play. How else can it come into play if such moments... attended to our dukkha instructs us on the way of sukha and it's in all of its forms whether it's the tension the built-in tension of your hamstrings

[40:33]

feeling like your mind and heart contract around an afflictive emotion and in that feeling in that experiencing taking refuge Something is learned. A trust is developed. But it doesn't matter how many books we read and nod approvingly or take notes or underline. When the mind, the heart, and the vridda, the deep being, are touched by direct experience, something in us trusts.

[41:45]

A deeper form of taking refuge. So as we continue in Sashin, you know, this fascicle is called studying with body and mind, studying the way, learning the way, realizing the way with body and mind. And what else is there to this human existence? can we keep close this appreciation for the point of interaction even though at times it may be obvious you know the character of the interaction and the consequence the teaching may be mysterious

[43:10]

Sometimes when we continue our sitting in the usual way, we're holding together the sense of self, the sense of being, the sense of space and time start to dissolve. Not knowing is not acute perspective that we're taking on. No. Not knowing. has its in its grasp. And what's learned becomes, actually what's happening becomes obscure. Sometimes the mind becomes clear.

[44:16]

Then we see a deliberate or a course of thinking. And in that clarity, It's something contracting, dissolves. So sometimes mysterious, sometimes clear. Sometimes it flows, sometimes and the spirit of our tradition I would say this morning is what's happening now and what is it to practice with it if there's a lot of thinking usually

[45:44]

the response to those questions involves thinking if the mind is settled and and it's more in a sensate experiential mode the whole process is thoughtless that point of interaction in the body, in the breath. Not so easily seen in the mind, but in the body and the breath, we can see the wordlessness of that point of interaction. That's why it's so helpful. to allow the inhale.

[46:48]

And notice the physical sensations. Notice the influence of allowing on the mind. Notice that sometimes when there's full opening to it, it's transformative. And sometimes when the mind is active, it's insipid. like the intention to experience the inhale but a second two seconds later there's thoughts and the inhale disappears sometimes when the mind is quieter we see the opening to inhale the opening to experience, the opening to what is.

[47:52]

We feel it ripple through the body. We feel how there can be a quality of moving down in it. And as we become familiar with this, we can work with it intentionally. If we're not familiar with the experience, we have to be very careful about conceptually applying ideas to the breath. There are many practices in relationship to that, but I would say having connection to the sensations in the breath is very helpful in working with the breath in a deliberate way.

[49:01]

And I would also say, as we open to the inhale, as we learn about the sensations of breathing in, how to work with it sort of presents itself. And then in the pause, in the pause between inhale and exhale, the pause is its own opportunity to reestablish presence, to let there be, in that momentary transition, a kind of stillness, the body recalibrates, absorbs the in-breath, and gives over to the out-breath.

[50:09]

And attending to the in-breath, the pause, and the out-breath, and then the out-breath has a different quality than the in-breath. Release has a different quality from allow. That which has arisen is allowed to fall away. And this can be helpful if that which has arisen is a complex psychological, emotional, conceptual, event. Still, the high breath can be of help. If this is a thoughtless event, a canno doko that goes beyond knowing what's being learned.

[51:19]

If that didn't make any sense to you, don't worry about it. And then the pause, and then start over again. With great patience. How long will this cycle of breathing go on? Beyond time. That's what's asked of us. That's what's given to us. And what's the body in which this can take place? Another

[52:36]

great learning in a way another great challenge I think that's enough for today but let me finish with this poem again you and art your exact errors make a music that nobody hears hmm maybe everybody hears Your straying feet find the great dance, or walking alone, or doing kinyin with everyone. You live in a world where stumbling always leads home. Isn't everywhere home? Years after years, fits over your face. When there was youth, Your talent was youth.

[53:37]

Later, you find your way by touch where moss redeems the stone. And you discover where music begins before it makes any sound. Far in the mountains where canyons go still as the always falling ever new flakes of snow. Thank you. Thank you for listening to this podcast offered by the San Francisco Zen Center. Our Dharma talks are offered free of charge, and this is made possible by the donations we receive. Your financial support helps us to continue to offer the Dharma. For more information, visit sfcc.org and click giving.

[54:28]

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