This podcast is offered by the San Francisco Zen Center on the web at www.sfzc.org. Our public programs are made possible by donations from people like you. Good morning. It's often helpful to ask ourselves... What has been learned? Of course, we run the risk of thinking, I have learned something or now I have something. But learning is more an act of humility. It's more remembering to be a good student. discovering how to be teachable.

[01:01]

And in the learning, how to let it flow through, how to let it come in and be actualized. What has been learned? and what has been learned before we get busy packing ourselves back in a box and taping it shut and sending it off somewhere. Unfortunately, we usually feel obliged to follow it. and think we own it. So a con that talks about this.

[02:16]

This process of diligent practice. Something, some experience, registers, resonates, instructs, undoes, illuminates, drops something away, brings something forward. In all these amazing and wonderful ways we learn, suddenly you see something you've seen a thousand times before but didn't see it you hear casual comment and it cracks something open something that you've been carrying as an affliction you now see

[03:30]

It has its own tender mercy. So here's the coin. Among us, Chimona. What is the essence of prajna? There's a good, straightforward question. What is the essence of prajna? And he, of course, gives a good straightforward answer. Oyster swallows the moon. An allusion to how oysters create pearls. In the full moonlight, they swim up to the surface and they open up and they swallow the moonlight. And that's where pearls come from.

[04:32]

You may have heard other theories on this subject. What is it when this self with its marvelous defenses with the assurance and heart exterior of its separateness opens and lets in lets something in lets that teaching lets that illustration of freedom, lets that expression of wisdom, of prajna, lets it in, swallows it, takes it to heart, becomes it.

[05:52]

In Rilke's poem about Buddha, he says, and in you presence, and in you presence. And then in another poem, he writes about becoming an adult. Giving to her, giving to all her questions, one answer in you, who were once a child, in you. That one answer to all her questions on becoming an adult. Taking in the lessons learned. up that hard shell?

[07:08]

Shall we wait until it's forced open by the intensity of circumstance? Or shall we be a good student? Shall we be eager to learn? When we're a good student, Not knowing isn't admission of defeat. Not knowing is an adventure. It's an appreciation of the bhakti of the world. It's knowing that each time the hand opens, the Dharma appears. It's knowing how to be nourished.

[08:10]

What is the essence of prajna? The oyster swallows the moon. So the monk asks, what is the function of prajna? And again, Chi Man is explicitly clear. Her conceives in the moonlight. There's a Her living in the moon, and it becomes pregnant by taking in the moonlight. We take in the teachings. We take in the realizations. Not so much that we own them, that we have them, that now I am wise.

[09:24]

Now I know something. I have knowledge. No. We take them in, There is the alchemy of swallowing the moonlight. And it flows through us. It reorders the significance, the relevance of what is. The so-called afflictions and limitations of our karmic life are illustrations of what is. Our teachings on how to make contact, how to experience, and how to go beyond grasping.

[10:27]

And to give birth. What is the function of it? Give birth. Let something be actualized and enter the world in the realm of activity. Okay, so that was the warm-up, Cohen. You know, like when you go to a rock concert and they have the warm-up band? So here's the coin. Now you're warmed up. Or chilled out, whatever you want. What use would all this be? How could this not just be an extraordinary act of self-indulgence?

[11:30]

if there wasn't a way to give it back, if there wasn't a way to take these riches that we have received. Giving and receiving function together. If there isn't giving, there's no receiving. Giver, receiver, and gift. May the three actions be pure. Because they function together. So we open, we receive, we give back. Sometimes we say, save all beings. What the heck does that mean? So then this god, talking about this.

[12:37]

Ongan says, the dojo, what about Kanzayan's many hands and eyes? The image of Kanzayan, thousand arms, thousand hands, on each hand an eye? What about khanzaeans, thighs and hands and eyes? What about the functionality, the efficacy? What is it to give back? What is that activity? What is that state of being? What is it that's a gift? And what about a thousand? Why not just two? Or even one? Or none?

[13:41]

It's like reaching for a pillow in the night. No, it's not a big deal. It's not... Me, in my glory, pitying other in their depravity, will reach over and drop a blessing on their forehead. When we're not separate, When there's an itch on our face, we just scratch it. When we're asleep and the pillow's in the wrong position, without even waking up, we just adjust.

[14:52]

When there's this intimate connection, when there isn't this great divide between my needs and others' needs. Something just functions simply, organically, directly. We don't say, I vow to scratch when I itch. to alleviate suffering. Someone told me once they went on a kind of excursion or retreat. I'm not sure what it was. It was Thich Nhat Hanh.

[15:52]

And he said, well, buddy up with someone. Have a buddy. Have someone. And then think of it this way. Think of instead of having one body, you know I have two bodies. So take care of both of your bodies. The Dharma says this whole world is one body. This is the with a thousand hands and eyes, just one body. Natural, simple. When we're not agitated, when we're not distressed, when we're not overwhelmed by our own suffering,

[16:59]

We're not feeling depleted and frightened and defensive. This giving, that hand reaches out before the mind is even made. It's great proclamation of vowing to help. That's what he's pointing at. It's not such a big deal. You don't have to go around with a t-shirt saying, I'm a bodhisattva. Or as Naomi, she says in her poem about being famous, I want to be famous like a buttonhole is famous to a button. like a tear is famous to a cheek.

[18:09]

I want to be famous as the lady who smiled back. Meet the world kindly. So here Dougal is just as... separation is not defining things it just happens in ungan says I understand which is a dangerous thing to sense that you mean you have understanding you have knowledge you know So, of course, Doggo couldn't let him get away with that.

[19:11]

So he says, how do you understand? Because if the request is to be a good student, if the request is to be swallowed the moon, to be impregnated by the moon and and give birth to its offspring. Somewhere there is a relationship. How do you understand? What's the relationship? What is it? And he says, all over the body, hands and eyes.

[20:12]

All over. And Doggo says, 80%. He says, well, what would you say then? And he said, nothing but hands and eyes. Another great Zen story. do we learn from it? How does it instruct us as you re-enter?

[21:17]

Which of course is only a dream. We don't go back. We don't re-enter. We go forward. We begin anew. We begin a new life. How much will we insist upon the continuance of our old life? How much will we insist on relating to the particulars as we related to them in the past? in having received the gift of the dharma, how will we give it back? Because what more beautiful way to let go of the preoccupation of self than to let giving and receiving flow.

[22:29]

It's no different than receiving the inhale and giving the exhale. It's no different than the flow of life through our own body. You eat the food, you poop it out. I mean, it's just everything's flow. Nothing is staying still long enough to be owned and had. You can pack your possessions in a box. But no matter how much tape you put on the box, they'll fly away. So I would say something like this. Being simple-minded that I am, go back to basics.

[23:31]

What are the basics of a bodhisattva? As best you can, don't harm. Don't cause problems for others. Don't make matters worse. Or for yourself. Don't harm, do good. If it's just a smile, give a smile. It spawns a lot. Keep some kind of basic generosity towards yourself, towards others. When we watch carefully, sometimes we find generosity towards others instructs us on how to be generous with ourselves.

[24:47]

Taking care of others teaches us something about taking care of ourselves. And then sometimes the other way around. Sometimes our own anguish and pain is so demanding that it's primary. But either way, a generosity. Either way, try not to make things worse. as a humble student, explore what helps. What helps? It's a beautiful phrase.

[25:50]

What helps? I was in the mission in San Francisco and I saw this guy crouched down the street. And I went over At the time beside him, I said, are you okay? And he was lost in some psychotic state. Still, we say, what helps? Are you okay? doesn't always mean something magnificent. And then he jumped up and went off singing.

[26:51]

He didn't. I don't even know if my presence registered. Or maybe it was the one thing that helped him from tipping over the edge. So this basic attitude, generosity, helpfulness. is mutuality of giver, receiver, and gift. We're always somewhere in that circle. And really, it doesn't matter which one you are.

[27:56]

Sooner or later, you'll be the other. And hopefully our dedicated practice has loosened something up, has let that oyster shell open up enough to take in some tenderizing moonlight. That the mutuality of existence has touched us. We're not some glorious hero. We're just part of this extraordinary flow of existence.

[29:02]

And then within the crucible of that basic, boundless generosity and mutuality, to hold the preciousness of what practice reveals for us. It's a rare privilege to get to do a practice period. It's a rare privilege to have your knees hurt, your back hurt, your headache, to feel sleep deprived, to have the winter dark frighten you, and to have the spring warmth lift you up and bring you in to show you to heaven.

[30:26]

All of this, every part of it. This world. I read somewhere where it said something like this. If you have enough food to eat today, and you have a comfortable place to sleep, sheltered from the elements, you're among the richest 30% in the world. Wow. Enough to eat and a place to sleep. If you have clean water and sanitation, you're in the elite. This fierce world. to carve out of this a moment to receive, to take in the great gift of the Dharma, the great gift of the Buddha and the Sangha.

[31:46]

What is it to take it in and what is it to let it flow out in action? What would be the point if that actualizing was not coming forth? That in some crevice or corner of your mind, there's a glimmering thought of awakening. That back then, on the third evening of Sashin, you had an experience of concentration. So what? So what you followed your breath? So what? Your body felt light. energized but can it flow through can it come forth and invite everything invite everyone I think

[33:21]

For most of us, everything is not so bad. What's more comforting than Mary Oliver's people-less poems? The most you've got to deal with is her dog. And as far as the poems go, it's a pretty nice dog. Jumping through the marshes and a few crickets and glasshoppers birds, but people. But what a wonderful way to come forward. But in the humility of gogos, like reaching for a pillow in the night.

[34:30]

Like when you're buying gas and you're going to pay for it. Acting like this person in front of you, running the register, is a real live human being. is a real person who would enjoy a smile, who would appreciate being recognized. This was probably not their high school dream when they were thinking, what would I like to do in my life? Here they are. Could you be the person that makes their day?

[35:40]

And the beautiful gift of the Dharma is that it helps us discover Kindless hands and eyes. There's endless ways to be of service. There's endless ways to give the gift. There's endless requests to step out of the enclosure of the self. and greet and give. This is how the bodhisattva comes forth.

[36:50]

for us is this taste of freedom this taste of realization this taste of no self how does it flow through our fingertips how do we enter the conditioned world with an unconditioned response So this is a funny time now in the practice period. The math is pretty simple. Let's see, is it down to one hand yet?

[37:59]

Yes? I've heard it on authority, it is down to one hand. One hand counting. the world according to me can be even the parts we dread still a strange fascination or attraction oh let me think about that really painful thing oh that's painful oh I'm dreading that I thought Let me think about it again. Will the lessons learned just sort of like go into a dream world?

[39:17]

What was that again? When? What? I can't remember. dry up and shrivel into an idea. On the evening of the third day, I followed my breath. Why the hell did I think that was something special? In the moment, it broke open the world. In the moment, the affliction of self flew away in the breeze. In the moment, body and mind flowed like liquid energy. But now it's just a desiccated half memory. Potency, can it allow something to glow, to vibrate?

[40:36]

Can it nourish something in our being? Maybe it's dangerous to say one bright pearl. Why else would we have so many admonitions saying, nothing special? But nothing special is pretty special. Nothing special in a world where we're saying, it will be awful if I don't get this. It will be terrible if I get that. The ease, the precious ease of just this is enough. The luminous nourishment of intimacy.

[41:43]

Can it undo us? vibrate in our being. And the Buddha Dharma says, let it flow through. Let it become action. And that action forms a circle. Giver, receiver, and gift. There's a book called The Gift. I think it's by Louis White. And he talks about a tribe up in the Northwest. And they have these symbolic gifts that the tribe has collected. And the gifts are given around the tribe. So you get it, you receive it, you have this great gift, you keep it a while, and then you give it to somebody else.

[42:55]

Everybody gets the gift. And then when the white man came, they were given gifts. But they thought, oh, this is mine. I have it. I'm keeping it. And the native Indians were mystified like, what? You're going to do what? don't you know if you keep it nobody else will have it and then it even became like a negative comment like oh you're an Indian giver meaning oh you give a gift but then you want a buck he didn't really give it to me you don't really let me own it and keep it and never give it to anybody else that's right because the mutuality of existence this is what makes us all rich we all get to share the gift

[44:27]

We all get to be the giver, receiver, and the gift. So, this. And since I want to read, you can just stay there for a second. Just one more second. We'll skip lunch. No, we won't. Nazem Ahmed's poem on living. Living is no laughing matter. You must live with great seriousness, like a squirrel, for example. I mean, without looking for something beyond and above living, I mean, living must be your whole life. Living is no laughing matter.

[45:31]

You must take it seriously. So much so, And to such a degree that, for example, your hands tied behind your back, your back against a wall, or in a laboratory, your white coat and your safety glasses, you can die for people. Even for people whose faces you've never seen. Even though you know living is the most real, the most beautiful thing. I mean, You must take living so seriously that even at 70, for example, you plant olive trees. And not for your children either. But because although you fear death, you don't believe it. Because living, I mean, weighs heavier. I mean, however and wherever we are, we must live as if we will never die. We are the Buddha, the Dharma, and the Sangha.

[46:46]

We live it. We be it. We participate in the mutuality of giver, receiver, and gift. And we support and invite everyone to join the party. This is the bodhisattva saving all beings. Just ask the squirrels. Thank you very much. Thank you for listening to this podcast offered by the San Francisco Zen Center. Our Dharma talks are offered free of charge and this is made possible by the donations we receive. Your financial support helps us to continue to offer the Dharma. For more information, visit SSCC.org and click Giving.

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