Good evening. I wanted to express my gratitude for this place and for Suzuki Roshi coming 50 years ago we this weekend just had a little workshop recognizing the fact that it's been 50 years since he made the decision and flew from from Tokyo to San Francisco bringing the practice of Zen to America There had already been people talking about it.

[01:01]

Quite a bit of talk about it. There was already beat zen and actually a long tradition of people opening up their hearts and minds and Still, there was something that people were looking for. So when he arrived and started sitting at Sakoji Temple in San Francisco, various people came and joined him. So I just want you to enjoy the practice that he brought. Simply sitting. And appreciating the miracle of your life.

[02:09]

Breath by breath. We had some events at San Francisco Zen Center in the city and at Green Gulch Farm. a lot of the stories that were told about Suzuki Roshi I'd heard before but the one that comes to my mind right now is Lou Richmond talking about having breakfast at Berkeley Zen Center with Mel and a few other maybe three or four people and Suzuki Roshi and his his wife, who we all called Okusan, which just means wife, Mitsu Suzuki. And, I don't know, breakfast or dinner, I guess it was dinner.

[03:20]

And at some point, Mitsu Suzuki says something And Lu wasn't sure what she said. And then she said, skosh, which means just a little. But he wasn't sure what she was saying. So he said, squash. And she said, skosh. He said, squash? So there was this, then there was this little pause. And Suzuki Roshi's voice came through saying, zucchini. Zucchini. Very clear, cleared up the whole situation. But the one word, zucchini, it was just like, in that little pause, his voice came through. Zucchini. And Lou remembered that, his first Dharma teaching from Suzuki Roshi.

[04:28]

We say, why did Bodhidharma come from the West, or why did Suzuki Roshi come from the West? Zucchini comes through. He clearly wanted to communicate the true, original, undivided way. In one of the talks that's in Zen Mind Beginner's Mind, he begins by saying, if you want to understand Buddhism, you have to forget all your preconceived ideas. To begin with, you have to completely give up your idea of substantiality.

[05:37]

So this is pretty difficult practice. This is a great challenge. I might say, oh, okay, I'd like to do that. I'd like to give up my preconceived ideas. And even to say that, though, is to confirm a preconceived idea. As soon as I say, I'd like to give up, that I is the most difficult preconceived idea to give up. So he expressed That existence is both in this Buddha Dharma, existence and non-existence are both included.

[06:48]

But if you just hold to the idea of existence, of something substantial, then you are just contributing to more suffering. So the bird... of course exists and at the same time does not exist. You exist and do not exist. Maybe mostly do not exist. So human beings going around preoccupied with our idea of our existence is really a dead end. But hard to see that, very hard to see. Of course, here in the mountains, maybe it's easier to see that I'm not separate from the mountains.

[08:04]

And we hear the sound of Tashara Creek and get into the hot plunge and know, okay, I'm not separate from the water. And when the fire is burning down the mountain, knowing, okay, not separate from the fire. So this body This body sitting right here is not my possession. It seems substantial. And of course, this teaching does not deny that there's flesh and there's blood and there's bones.

[09:12]

It just denies that it's substantial. Just denies that it has some independent existence. So Suzuki Roshi used the phrase to see things as it is. To see things as it is is another way to say form is emptiness. Things is duality. The many, many phenomena. as it is, that it, that it is non-duality.

[10:13]

So this is a challenge to see things clearly, to see things as it is. So most fundamental teaching in Buddhism is to point out that all of our suffering comes from a basic ignorance ignorance Sanskrit word avidja avidja usually just translated as ignorance the English word ignorance comes from the roots that mean not having knowledge So you might think that the solution to ignorance is to acquire knowledge.

[11:18]

But the Sanskrit word avidja, I think it's helpful to me to think that avidja means not clearly seeing or not clearly cognizing. So not to clearly cognize points to what we usually think of as knowledge or what we know is actually interfering with our seeing, interfering with our cognizing, interfering with our perception of what is. So to see things as it is means as Suzuki Roshi said, to give up all of your preconceived ideas.

[12:27]

Preconceived ideas then usually come up in the form of something that we react to. something that may be something that we react to positively or negatively. And then we base our life on that reaction and really identify with it. Abraham Lincoln told a story about a pharaoh who was on his deathbed. And so at that time, he was talking to the priest and he said, I really want to die with a clear conscience. And the priest said, well, what's stopping you from having a clear conscience?

[13:40]

And the dying man said, well, I've had this grudge I've had this grudge against my neighbor for years, you know. And so somebody went out and got the neighbor. His name is George. So bring in George, the neighbor, to the deathbed. And the dying man says, George, you know, now that I'm dying, I want to confess that I've hated you, you know. for years which is why I've always avoided you and didn't talk to you and so now that I'm dying I want to clear my conscience and I want to tell you that I'm sorry that you cut down that tree that you weren't supposed to cut down I was really angry about it

[14:47]

And so they tearfully embraced each other. And then George got up to leave and go out the door. And when he gets to the door, the dying man says, George, if I can shake this thing and I don't die, my grudge will stay on. So it's pretty hard to give up preconceived ideas. I think maybe many of us are like that actually. Think, well, okay, I'll give it up if I really have to. To die with a clear conscience, I'll give it up. But then, how would I

[15:55]

how would I go about my life if I didn't have that, if I didn't have that grudge? For a while, when I started to, well, before I started Zen practice, I was looking at my own, uh, inability to see things. I was doing a lot of photography and when I would carefully frame the subject, take the picture, come back, look at the negative, it wasn't what I thought was in the picture. Time it again, I would carefully look and see what I thought was in the picture and then take the photograph and come back and find something else.

[17:09]

And I began to realize how much I could do by framing, just changing the angle or changing the frame or changing the distance. I could have a whole different picture. of what was right in front of me. And then I began to realize that there's ways in which what I wanted to see affected the picture. What I thought, I really believed, what I thought was there, what I wanted to see was what I thought was there. And it was frustrating. The camera did not agree with me. So this was again and again a kind of teaching. What's going on here in my own world of perception?

[18:14]

And seeing that my desire, my preconceived idea, was affecting what I saw. And then I began to notice that in meeting the people around me that I had preconceived ideas and that I began to question whether I could really see the people around me. And in looking at how my own state of mind affected who I thought was in front of me I had to stop and sit down for a while. So I stopped and sat down for a while and now I'm still sitting, studying how my own preconceived ideas affect who I see in front of me.

[19:19]

So if I have some desire for someone to be a certain way, is that them? Or is that some cloud of my own that I'm putting in between me and them? Or if I have some attitude of discomfort Irritation or ill will with someone. Is that them? It's really hard for me to tell the difference, right? Who is that? Who is that without my own cloud of delusion? So most of the time, I think most people are not actually practicing the freedom from ignorance, of clearly cognizing.

[20:45]

So for me, a lot of times, the best I can do is to just try to take into account my own my own bias, my own prejudice, my own irritation or my own desire. So among the various desires, of course, sexual desire is very potent, very powerful. So if I see someone and experiencing sexual energy, then it's very hard to see, okay, who is that person? I'm seeing my own cloud of desire. And the cloud of desire is based on a fundamental idea of separation.

[21:56]

a belief of a divided world. A belief that that person is there and I'm here. A belief that I'm not that person. A belief that I'm not the mountain. That I'm not the bird. So in This practice of stopping, there is this possibility of dropping preconceived ideas. Breath by breath, noticing, ah, there's an idea that is not really needed, right? Something extra. So this is kind of a process of clearing the mind.

[23:01]

Noticing the ways I want to hold on, just like the dying man wanted to hold on to his grudge. Fearing what the world might be like if I'm not holding on to it. So, faced with that recognition, that fear, I offered the bodhisattva vow. The bodhisattva vow is to do the impossible.

[24:08]

To be willing to wake up with whatever is arising into your consciousness without adding some thought of separation, without adding a thought of desire, without adding a thought of irritation, without turning away, and without getting entangled to see a person in front of oneself and say what's best for that person that my own idea is not what's important what's important

[25:21]

is to put my own idea aside and see what's best, what's best for the person in front of me, their request, their life, their own Buddha nature, their own true nature. So, moment by moment, then, this is the place of choice. Of seeing, okay, here's a habit, here's a preconceived idea, here's a thought, here's a desire, here's something I'm holding on to, or something I'm pushing away. And seeing that to see there's a space.

[26:25]

I don't have to act on it. I can let that preconceived idea alone. Acting on it concretizes that cloud of delusion. Not acting on it lets it dissolve. Not acting on it when you see it clearly is great compassion. Seeing it clearly is great wisdom. So being willing to be in that uncomfortable place of not knowing what it is when it's

[27:28]

released? What world opens up when I don't define it and I don't control it? Who do I meet when I don't already have some attitude about who it is? So step by step, this way is clearing the mind of avidya. Clearing the mind of all the things that clutter up the cognition. And what it feels like is It feels like a loving, connected, spacious life.

[28:36]

Not filled with things that one is encumbered by and attached to. Knowing that already there is connection, complete It's like, since you've already met, you don't need to make some exaggerated effort. So this goes for how one relates to earth how one relates to plants how one relates to people as oneself meeting oneself in each thing unencumbered by some particular bias and view

[29:54]

most of the time. Can't do it. So living with the Bodhisattva vow means taking into account that one will probably forget. And so how to remember. how to refresh your intention. Each day to get up and remember, okay, what is it? I vow to do what's impossible. I vow to wake up with whatever arises. I vow to notice the ways in which I interfere with seeing.

[31:08]

And then, ten minutes later, again, how do I remember? So part of the value of Tassahara is to create a place where we remind each other. Those who live here remind each other every day. Every day we again commit to doing what's impossible. It's impossible because there isn't anyone to do it. It's impossible because to think that there's someone to do it would be falling into some idea of substantiality. And yet, there's one who must do it.

[32:21]

And so this is a place to remind each day to take up this great vow. And never give up. And then Thaisalaya becomes a place that is a beacon for the whole world. Have other people know, okay, oh, I hear there's a place where people are doing the impossible. It doesn't look like anything extraordinary. It just comes down to taking care of what's right in front of you. Fully appreciating that it is you you're taking care of.

[33:25]

To think that it's other than you is to make things substantial. To see that it is you is to disappear and forget your self. So Suzuki Roshi had something indescribable in mind, inconceivable in mind. Even he could not grasp it. Because to grasp it would again be to make it into something.

[34:28]

And yet there was this feeling, this wonderful feeling of practice that he could see. And could encourage people to do. And then forget. And then remind. Remind ourselves again and again. So my hope is that anyone who comes here will have this feeling that there are people here who are completely sincere. Doing the impossible. that this is a safe place to come and do the impossible. It's a place where there is opportunity every moment to release your preconceived ideas.

[35:33]

Where you don't have to wait until you die So let go of your grudge against whoever it is, your neighbor, your father, your mother, the president, the ex-president, the leader of North Korea, the person on your serving crew, person who let you down because they didn't show up. And even them not showing up doesn't separate you. Because you're right there with them also, not showing up.

[36:44]

this compassionate practice has been given to us by Buddhas and ancestors and particularly here with the kindness and generosity of Shinriya Suzuki Daiyo Shou. Now you have it. Each of you is a Buddha. There's no one else to do it. Don't fail him! Don't fail yourself. Thank you for listening.

[37:53]

@Transcribed_UNK
@Text_v005
@Score_96.53