This podcast is offered by the San Francisco Zen Center on the web at www.sfzc.org. Our public programs are made possible by donations from people like you. Good morning. That was a rousing chat. The whole thing is right there. I'm going to continue with sort of where I left off yesterday, except that I'm going to go back to one statement. And the statement is, the way of realizing the essence of mind is above the comprehension of the ignorant.

[01:00]

And I said that I was... didn't like so much the translation ignorant because it had a negative connotation basically ignorance simply means not ignoring it means fundamentally ignoring something or not not being able to see it even though it's in front of you we're all in ignorance because we really don't see what's really in front of us most of the time. But I would say that in this practice we have affinity, or we don't have affinity. I would rather use the word affinity. It's not clear.

[02:04]

doesn't mean anything to someone who doesn't have an affinity with it. I think I did talk about that yesterday. Affinity is like you're drawn to something magnetically. It's like when you meet something that you have affinity with, you connect. naturally so some people have a natural affinity others have an affinity but it's not present it's a potential affinity so some people are attracted to practice right away and some people will practice for a while there is affinity but it's there's also a lot of doubt about the affinity.

[03:07]

Although the practice is open to everyone, it's not for everyone. And it's interesting, later on, Hui Nung says, I'll read that to you. I can't find it. But it's like every species on Earth has their own way of salvation. And when everyone finds their own way of salvation, they don't interfere with each other. So for some people, this is it for other people something else is it right so but in order to really have faith in this practice we really have to have an affinity for it have to be ready for it and be ready to let go of everything else I always like to say that if you want the most precious thing you have to pay the highest price

[04:39]

so you have to be willing to pay the highest price for the most valuable thing which has no value it only has virtue so I'm going to continue where I left off I think he says, if we are treading the path of enlightenment, we need not be worried by stumbling blocks. Provided that we keep a constant eye on our own faults, we will not go astray from the right path.

[05:43]

Oh yeah, since every species of life has its own way of salvation, they will not interfere with or be antagonistic to one another. Therefore, if we leave our own path and seek some other way of salvation, we shall not find it. And if we plot on until death overtakes us, we shall find only regret in the end. So if you wish to find the true way, right action will lead you to it. but if you do not make effort in the way come to a crease in the page you will grope in the dark and never find it so if you are treading the path of enlightenment we won't be worried by stumbling blocks so without stumbling blocks we can't practice because we will always be coming up against stumbling blocks so stumbling blocks are we call them opportunities we say hell is just another place to practice we have to realize that it

[07:13]

If we give ourselves to practice, then everything we do is considered an act of practice. So when everything we do is an act of practice, it takes it out of our personal me life. It's practice life. It's not just my activity. Practice life means whatever... Every moment is a moment of practice. How do I practice in this moment with this activity? How do I practice on each moment, this moment, as practice, not just as selfish desire? Practice means letting go of selfish desire. We exchange that for practice. So we're always coming up against selfish desire.

[08:18]

These are called stumbling blocks. It's not so much the thing that's in front of us that's a stumbling block. It's our self that's the stumbling block. But we look outside and see stumbling blocks out there. But stumbling blocks are simply our attachment to self. So he says, if you're practicing, if everything you do is considered practice, then stumbling blocks don't hinder you. And you look inward to see where the problem is, not so much where the fault is, but where the problem is. Where am I stuck? What is it that's keeping me from... or from, why am I so stupid? Why am I not, you know, we have all these problems.

[09:22]

Why am I stuck where I'm stuck? And then, so we start blaming the outside circumstances for our problems. And as long as we're blaming outside circumstances for our problems, we're stuck. When we stop blaming outside circumstances and look inward and realize that the stuckness is within ourself, not out there, then that's called practice. So it gives us some relief, actually. We can get some distance, some separation or distance from our suffering. because our activity is in the realm of practice rather than in the selfish realm. Or in the self-centered realm.

[10:28]

So if we're treading the path of enlightenment, we need not be worried by stumbling blocks, because stumbling blocks, so to speak, are just opportunities for practice. This is the most important aspect of practice. And provided we keep a constant eye on our own faults, I would say maybe shortcomings, sometimes faults, we will not go astray from the right path. So how to practice in each situation? How do I practice when somebody insults me? How do I practice when I drop the tray of dishes? How do I practice when I don't know what to do next? So, since every species of life has its own way of salvation, they will not interfere with or be antagonistic to one another.

[11:41]

so I remember Suzuki Roshi used to say we should be strict with ourselves and compassionate with others means we should pay attention to our own practice you may feel that nobody's practicing as well as you are They're all making mistakes. Everybody around him is making mistakes. But this is a big mistake because this is the biggest mistake. When it comes to judgment, the abbot or the teacher has to deal with everyone's mistakes and shortcomings. You only have to deal with your own.

[12:44]

So, how do you do that? You know, when you come in, the abbot comes in to do service, and the things on the altar, all the objects on the altar are a little bit out of line, and the service starts, and the bells are kind of wacky, and the kugio is being hit too hard, and slows down and the Kokyo's voice doesn't match everybody else's this happens all the time so how do you let how do you observe all of this that everyone's every shortcoming and not let it affect you And at the same time, not ignore it. And still feel great compassion and love for everybody.

[13:52]

So therefore, if we leave our own path and seek some other way, we will not find it. Constancy is a very important aspect of practice. Whether you like it or not, you just continue. It has nothing to do with whether you like it or don't like it. If you can practice whether you like it or don't like it, because we practice according to our intention, not because of our feelings. Intention is the leader. The feelings follow the leader. If we give in to our feelings, feelings are fickle.

[15:02]

Feelings will lead us any way they want to. Oh, I've got a headache today, you know, so I don't want to go to the Zendo. That's following your feelings. It's not following your intention. It may be that you have to stay in bed. That's okay. But is that really the reason? So we have to respect our feelings. But our feelings have to follow our intention, basically. If the feelings take precedence over the intention, of course, feelings and intention have to balance each other. That's true. We have to pay attention to our feelings, but intention has to be the leader.

[16:04]

And that way... you can go through every circumstance without being discouraged. Because it's really easy to be discouraged. As soon as things start getting difficult, our feelings start taking over. Then we start losing our direction. So... this is a very hard part of practice this is what separates those who I don't want to say too much about that but it's what separates those with real intention from those who would rather

[17:09]

go a different way it's like when you come up to a wall you're going like this and you can either go through the wall or if it's too big of a wall you go this way so with intention you can get through the wall if you don't if your intention is not strong and your feelings are taking over then you go this way So it takes a lot of strength, and this is what gives your practice strength. The bigger the obstacles, the bigger the strength, the more strength comes out of you. This is... the biggest the most important thing I learned from Suzuki Roshi because he would in his easy kind way brought this quality out of his students he allowed his students to or he he somehow brought this quality of

[18:35]

Going through the wall and continuing and using obstacles to bring out your Zen spirit. Without these obstacles, you can't get your spirit out. He says, if you wish to find the way, right action will lead you to it directly. But if you don't make the effort in the way, you will grope around in the dark and never find it.

[19:37]

You know, every step of the way, when you read the books, the books say you should strive for enlightenment. And so people think, I'm here at delusion, and I will end up at enlightenment if I strive for enlightenment. And enlightenment's over here, and I'm over here. And even though we tell you that's not so, you still believe it. Enlightenment, if you really are determined to practice, then every step is the right step. Every step is the goal. Each step is the goal. The goal is not over there. The goal is here. So I remember Suzuki Roshi saying, you should be enlightened every moment. What are you waiting for? This is not our invention.

[20:56]

This is basic Buddhism. Every step is the way, is the goal. The goal is not over there. It's right here. The hardest place to be is where we are. We always want to be someplace else. The real thing is over there. The reason we think that we're not enlightened is because we think where we are is not satisfactory. So there must be something else that's more satisfactory than where we are. If you want to be enlightened, just accept where you are right now, as it is. This is it. We say, this is it. We hear, this is it. But do we believe it? If you can realize that each step is it.

[22:01]

I mean, this is our life. We only have so many its. So many moments. How do we make this moment, how do we re-actualize this moment into being the true moment. So then he says, now we come to the fault-finding part, which is really hard to swallow. One who treads the path in earnest sees not the faults of the world. Ho, ho. How can we possibly not, how can we do that? That's a great wall. That's a great wall.

[23:02]

If we find fault with others, we ourselves are at fault. He says in the wrong, but I like to say at fault. When others are at fault, we should ignore it. For it is long for us to find fault by letting go of fault-finding. I added letting go of the habit of fault-finding, which is a little different. We cut off a source of defilement when neither love nor hatred disturb our mind serenely we sleep those who intend to be the teachers of others should themselves be skilled in the various expedients which lead others to enlightenment so one who treads the path in earnest sees not the faults of the world I remember

[24:20]

Suzuki Roshi at Tassahara. I was his Anja, his Jisha. And he said, when I walk through Tassahara, when I walk down the main street, I don't look around. I don't try to see who's doing what. I don't try to see, criticize people. He rarely criticized people. Matter of fact, I totally agreed with him. He said, it's not good to have too many rules. If you have too many rules, you're restricting people. And I like to see people who are mischievous. Because when I see the mischievousness, in people, I know who they are. I can tell who you are.

[25:22]

If you just, if everybody just, you know, by rote, abiding by the rules, it's hard to tell who the person really is. But when you see the people breaking the rules, you know who they are. I remember back in the 60s, when we were just starting Dazara, and somebody said, we should have a rule against drinking, about having liquor. And I thought, who's drinking? Why do we need to have a rule when nobody's doing something? In Buddha's time, Buddha didn't impose rules until somebody brought him a problem. And he said, well, let's look at the problem. And then, okay, we'll make a rule because I can see that there's a problem. And that's how the Vinaya came to be.

[26:26]

But then when he was dying, Ananda said, do we have to keep all the rules? And I think, let's see, he didn't answer something. And then Mahakashapa later said, Since he didn't answer, we'll keep them all. It doesn't mean that we shouldn't keep our rules. I don't like to think of them as rules. I like to think of them as procedures. We have procedures. We have a way of doing things that are procedures. And customs. I remember... at Page Street, when we opened the kaisando on the second floor, put that statue, which I don't like very much, of Suzuki Roshi there.

[27:28]

And then everybody was supposed to bow when they walked past it. And somebody was able to say, is that a rule that we have to bow every time we walk past that room? And I thought about it and I said, it's a custom. It's customary to do that. And when we observe our customs, then we have something in common that binds us together. But it's not a rule. If you don't bow, we won't kick you out. Or we won't fine you or something like that. Or criticize you even. You don't want to bow? Okay. It's not a rule that you have to bow, but it's a custom. So we have our customary way of doing things which helps us to do things. When we're standing at our seat, we turn certain ways.

[28:29]

We always turn to the right. We turn to the right to bow to our cushion. If some people bow to the right and some people bow to the left, we bump into each other. So our customs and our rules... are to help us. If they're not helping us, why do we use them? We don't want to bind you. Rules and regulations are not to bind you, they're to help us to organize our life. So, one who treads the path in earnest sees not the faults of the world. If we find fault with others, we ourselves are in the wrong. And when others are in the wrong, we should ignore it, for it is wrong for us to find fault. I think that we all do find fault.

[29:33]

But... If we're just looking for faults... That's called fault-finding. And we can put ourselves in a position to feel superior by finding fault with others. Matter of fact, one of the precepts is don't find fault with others and raise yourself up. One way of raising ourselves up is to lower others. If we can't get this high... Then we make everybody else lower. So it's a kind of dominance. We dominate by criticizing and finding fault. So we have to be careful about domination. And if we feel that we're in a low position, it's easy to criticize others, to raise ourselves up in our own eyes.

[30:45]

so by letting go of the habit of fault finding I see it as a habit it can be a habit we cut off a source of defilement so how do we let go of fault finding? there's something called reaction and there's something called response. Reacting is where you create a negative connection with somebody. If I see that somebody is doing something wrong and I get angry because I feel it's not right, that's a reaction but we can turn the reaction into a response meaning to step back and come from a different standpoint coming from a different standpoint of responding which is taking the edge off the reaction so that you can actually respond in a creative way rather than just an emotional way

[32:15]

So we say, oh, that had such a charge behind it. So how do you take the charge out of the reaction so that it becomes a response that is actually beneficial? What can I do to make this? What kind of skill can I bring up in order to make my response something beneficial, something that will work? help somebody because when we react we divide and we push somebody into a corner and when we push someone into a corner through criticism they naturally strike back so we always have to I don't know always it's really important to avoid putting someone in a position where they're helpless and have to strike back and it just causes more and more problems so and how do we step back when someone puts us in that position so that we don't strike back and that we can come forward with a response a creative response this makes life

[33:45]

more interesting and fun. Yeah, it makes it fun, you know, because there's some interplay that's not just reactive, and it becomes, it's like, this kind of an encounter becomes a koan right away. And how do you deal with that koan right away when someone insults you or puts you in a certain category or place where you feel you don't want to strike back, but you feel that you'd like to? And how do you respond in a way that freeze you.

[34:49]

We say about Joshu could always turn out of a situation, always could turn himself out of a situation, a difficult situation. When neither hatred nor love disturb our minds, we sleep. So most of us have been in the position where hate and love have disturbed our mind and we couldn't sleep. I'm sure we all have been there. So my question here is, who is the one that isn't disturbed? So love and hate. Love is wonderful, and hate is awful. But love and hate, in a dualistic sense, we can still be caught by them.

[35:58]

Love is a wonderful thing, and it's also a big trap. And anger, or hate, we always get caught by hate. So love is the opposite of hate, but still, it's a trap. It can be a trap. So how do we handle love without being caught by it? So that's a whole other subject, which... you know it's a big word and it covers so many different aspects but basically there's self-love self-love is a delusion because there's no self to love but we need to love ourselves in order to love others

[37:08]

We have to have some good feeling about ourselves, and then that's what we express to others. It's important. But self-love in the sense of selfish love is not the same. So if we are one with everyone else, then our self-love is the love that is expressed to everyone else, which is not selfish love. or self-centered love, is simply the basic feeling of well-being for everyone, without attachment. When we have that, we can sleep serenely. You know, Suzuki Roshi used to say, I do get angry. He said Zen masters, most Zen masters get really angry.

[38:09]

They really get angry. And when they do that, it's like a bolt of lightning that wipes everything out. But still, when I get angry, and I do, I do it as an expedient. He didn't say expedient. He said, I do it On purpose. In other words, I have the anger, but the anger doesn't have me. I do it to help you. Sometimes. So you can use something like anger. You can use that. But you have to be very careful that you don't get caught using your anger. Sometimes someone needs that. We have to avoid being goody two-shoes. If we're always too good, you know, that's not so good either.

[39:14]

We get caught by being too good. Because too good is the opposite of too bad. So where do you find that good that's not good or bad? Where do you find that love that's not the opposite of hate? who is the one who is not disturbed? He says, those who intend to be the teachers of others should themselves be skilled in the various expedients which lead others to enlightenment. Well, by practice, I mean by example, is the best one. And not to get caught by your feelings. And not to be reactive. using anger without being used by it and to treat everyone as Buddha if we treat everyone as Buddha then that's a wonderful koan people say well you know in the Soto school they don't have any koans they don't pay much attention to koans or enlightenment the koan is there every moment

[40:41]

You should not ignore each moment's koan. Every encounter has an aspect of a koan. How do you act in an enlightened way without falling into one side or the other? How do you stay free of everything at the same time you are totally in counter with everything. Not to be caught by anything while being in the midst of everything. That's the practice. That's enlightened practice. We're not seeking enlightenment. We're simply practicing. We practice enlightenment, not seeking enlightenment. So the reason we don't recognize it is because we think it's something else.

[41:57]

We have some idea about it. It's not your idea. It will never match your idea. So you can be it, but you can't see it. If you try to see it, you won't be it. If you try to peek... there it doesn't work so you can only be it it's all subjective so he says when the disciple is free from all doubts it indicates that their essence of mind has been found but doubt is important we have doubt types and faith types Suzuki Roshi and Dogen were faith types. And Hakuen and maybe Rinzai, doubt types.

[43:08]

But it doesn't matter. Doubt is the necessary aspect, balancing point for faith. So free from doubts, doesn't mean not having doubts. But to be free from doubts within doubt is important. Doubt needs to be included in faith. So he says, the pure land of Buddha is in this world within which enlightenment is to be found.

[44:18]

This is Mahayana practice, basically. It's kind of a criticism of Hinayana practice, which is to separate from this world in order to find nirvana. Nirvana is, of course, right here in our suffering. That's where we find nirvana. We find nirvana in the midst of suffering. To seek enlightenment by separating from this world is as absurd as to search for the horns of a rabbit or the feet of a snake. Right views are called transcendental. I'm not sure about that word. Erroneous views are called worldly.

[45:20]

When all views, right or erroneous, are let go of, Then the essence of Bodhi appears. So we shouldn't worry about essence or function. Transcendental is like essence rising above. And worldly is by being below. But we shouldn't worry about above and below. It's not something to worry about. Because worldly means functioning. The function of our essence of mind is our activity. So activity, worldly activity, is the functioning of essence. So essential mind, essence of mind, expresses itself through worldly activity.

[46:26]

We don't need to divide it into two. So there's nothing to worry about there. Right views are called transcendental, erroneous views are called worldly. But when we let go of those views, the essence of Bodhi appears. Right there is enlightenment. So this stanza is for the sudden school, even though he says it's neither sudden nor gradual. This stanza is for the sudden school. It is also called the big ship of Dharma. I love that. Big ship of Dharma for sailing across the ocean of existence. Kalpa after kalpa a person may be under delusion but once enlightened it takes but a moment to realize Buddhahood. So that's sudden enlightenment. It means all at once you see everything in perspective rather than adding one thing to another, and finally climbing up the stairs to enlightenment.

[47:31]

Just open up and see everything in perspective all at once. Well, this is the last talk, and I think it is. We're going to have a summing up meeting. Last class, yeah. After this. But if you have one or two questions, Then you should start worrying.

[48:42]

You know, that can also be an obstacle. So everybody has a challenge, you know. The beginner has the challenges of a beginner. seasoned student has the challenges of a seasoned student. The abbot has the challenges of an abbot. Everyone has, according to where they are, you have just the right amount of obstacle. I remember Suzuki Roshi gave a lecture about that. It's in Not Always So. You have just the right amount just the right amount of problems for you. So if you don't have a problem, don't worry about it. But just be open. The main thing is just to be open to what comes up.

[49:51]

You don't have to think about the future. Just remain open. It's like the cat and the mouse. You know, the cat just sits there and waits. And when the mouse appears, boom. So just be open. That's the best way to practice without anticipating. Anticipation. We have to think ahead, you know. But that's not the same as anticipation. I can't tell who you are, but I see your hand. Oh, yeah. Ki. Ki. Good. Yes. Right. Right. Right.

[50:58]

Right. Me too. Keep asking the question. Just keep asking the question. What do you do when you can't do something? That's the koan. What do you do when you can't do something? Maybe there is. First of all, take care of what's right in front of you. And then expand what's right in front of you, if you can, to widen that. And then, if you can, widen that.

[52:01]

So reaching over You lose your balance. So always stay with what you can do. If you can do just a little bit, that's enough. Because you cannot fix it. You can only do what you can do. So each one of us has a Buddha field. express yourself in that Buddha field which touches other fields other circles and if you can if you're sincere in what you're doing and that will actually set off other Buddha fields so it's little by little just little by little

[53:12]

we say, light up one corner of your world. And that has an effect in the world. We may feel, well, I'm just this little guy, you know, and I, you know, what can I do? But actually you can do what you can do, which is a lot. Because we don't know the far-reaching effect of our actions. our actions have a far-reaching effect. Whenever you do, the vibration just keeps going. I remember Suzuki Roshi saying, just light up your corner of the world. If you try to catch the tail of a comet, people will pity you. So what you're doing is just right.

[54:17]

What you're doing is just right. First of all, find yourself. Then the effect of your actions will become more contagious. why people don't want to come to London to do what they do. The basic part of Buddhist teaching is surely accessible to everybody. Yes. Or if people don't have a natural thing to put that practice?

[55:21]

Well, I would say, first, encourage people to have affinity. And then, when you get good at that, You can encourage people who don't have affinity, because it's one thing to try to persuade people, and it's another thing to influence people through your own actions. When people see how you are, then they'll say, well, I'd like to be like that too. But if you try to convince people, Yeah, so the main practice is to be yourself. The main teaching is to be yourself. So that, you know, eventually everyone, most everyone will go out in the world from here. And how will you deal with Ki's question?

[56:23]

That's the big question. Yes. Faith in the Dharma is not the same as belief. It's not, you know, you can say, well, I have faith in the Dharma. You can say I have faith in Buddha. I have faith in Buddha nature. You can say all those things that you have faith in. But those are words. Concepts. But faith and there's

[57:30]

various levels of faith which is too much to go into but confidence confidence in what you're doing but also just faith period not in something just it's more like if you name it you limit it. Even if you call it faith in Buddha nature or whatever, it's just, you know, you didn't ask to be born and you conducted your life in a certain way and then you no longer extant the world. So what can you do but just have faith?

[58:36]

Because the blood is running through this body, all the organs and the legs and the arms and body parts and movement, right? And you're getting older without trying. You just have to have faith. That everything is going the way it's supposed to go. That's what? Abiding. It's abiding? Yeah. Faith in each moment. Abiding. Non-abiding. It's really out of our hands. You know, we... I call it cooperation. We have a so-called self that cooperates with the universal activity that is myself.

[59:47]

So how do we cooperate with that? We can resist it or we can do all kinds of stuff that is counter to that, but how do we actually harmonize with the the universal activity that is myself. That's what we're doing. And you have to have faith in the universal activity. If you don't have faith in that, what do you got? You're not doing it. You're doing it, but this is our challenge, actually, how to cooperate with the universal activity. It's called space. Yes.

[60:51]

Would I vow to do no evil? Oh, evil. I'm surprised to see that word. Yes. I think we have to realize that we're working with translations, and what we're reading is the translator's conception of the words, which are accurate to a certain extent, but every translator will have a different view. how to express that. So I always take those words with a grain of salt. But Dogen does talk about evil, you know. And I do have a conception of evil, which means someone who is anti-life.

[61:57]

who tries to destroy our life. But even that is subject to being driven by certain forces. You know, everyone is driven by different forces, and these forces are extant in the world, the forces of darkness and light and balancing. evil is just the word that's used it's anti-life and cruelty and getting enjoyment out of being cruel that's what I would call evil getting satisfaction out of cruelty And it's misguided.

[63:00]

But that's just what I think. I don't know why it is. The balances, those forces are always there. And they'll never be reconciled in the world. Although they can be reconciled in a person. But they're just... This is the worldly way. So when we say, well, how are we going to save the world? Well, you do what you can. Because if you look for results, if you work for peace as a result, that won't happen. You'd be disappointed. You just work for peace because that's what you believe. That's what you want. And you just work for it knowing that it will never happen. You know, as Hakuin says in his commentary on the five ranks, the end, he says, foolish wise men filling the well with snow.

[64:19]

It makes me feel very emotional. Always wise men filling the well with snow, knowing that they can never do it and never be filled. You just do it. That's what practice is. You're just doing it without worrying about the result. feeling I don't know it's just so beautiful it's just beautiful that's the feeling I remember we were driving to Tassajara one time when my son Daniel is about five and

[66:00]

And we're playing the Beatles on the radio. And he started crying. He said, what's the matter? He says, it's so beautiful. We have to be satisfied with doing something what we can do and not worry about the result. There may be a result. There may be a big result. There may be a big reconciliation of the world. But we can't worry about that. We just keep working towards something even though

[67:02]

without worrying about what the end will be. And isn't that what our life is about? We just keep working, and boom, you're gone. But you just continue to the end. As a matter of fact, when I asked Suzuki Roshi, what is nirvana? He said, seeing one thing through to the end. Thank you for listening to this podcast offered by the San Francisco Zen Center. Our Dharma Talks are offered free of charge and this is made possible by the donations we receive. Your financial support helps us to continue to offer the Dharma. For more information, visit sfcc.org and click giving.

[67:48]

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