Good morning. Good morning. So... second day of Sashin, gathering the mind. It may feel a little bit like Sashin, even though, you know, we've been doing a practice period and there's not that much difference, right, from our regular schedule. So this morning, I can't tell, but I may be more deluded than usual on the second day.

[01:21]

I woke up out of a dream this morning, and I'm still not sure if I'm out of it. Because it was... there's a part of me that still wants to be dreaming. In the year 1242, Dogen, early in the year, wrote a fascicle in the Shobha Genzo called, now we call it, Great Enlightenment. And in that, he talks about how great enlightenment includes delusion. And that delusion does not exclude great enlightenment. And in that same... Actually, within another couple of months, he wrote a piece called The Point of Zazen.

[02:34]

And another piece called Going Beyond Buddha, Going Beyond Buddha, which he attributes to Dongshan. There's Dongshan saying, giving some teaching and saying, you should go beyond Buddha. And one of the students asked, so... who is that that goes beyond Buddha? And Dongshan said, not Buddha. So Dogen's strongly emphasizing this, in many of his writings, going beyond Buddha. Still, here we are, recognizing Buddha. Buddha. we have this figure up here on the altar.

[03:37]

And we have a Buddha figure in the abbot's cabin. And so this morning as I was dreaming about dreaming, I was pretty soon the anja gave me a cup of tea and I thought it's quite humbling actually to be to realize that it makes a difference to me to have a cup of tea it's like okay my hands are cold you know and there's this warm clay vessel little cup And there's this warm liquid in it with a little flavoring. I thought, it's not on the list of Factors of Enlightenment, but maybe tea?

[05:00]

so we say you know we say Bodhidharma you know Bodhidharma's eyelids you know the story Bodhidharma wanted to stay awake and cut off his eyelids carefully removed his eyelids and planted them and so that grew into the tea plant so But then what I thought was actually it's the clay and the feeling. I felt the feeling of connection with the earth, of some humility. And then I looked up and the Buddha in the alcove in the abbot's cabin is the image of Buddha touching the earth. In Green Gulch on the altar, we have Manjushri as the big figure up above.

[06:13]

And in the small figure in front of the Manjushri is Buddha. And that Buddha is touching the earth. So I think it would be remiss to skip over touching the earth, talking about Buddha's enlightenment. And enlightenment may not be such a... I think the word itself is problematic. I was thinking about that after yesterday. I thought, well, the fact that we have the word light in it is a problem, maybe. We may think that it's not dark. I thought, how about endarkenment? How about that, endarkenment? We have, you know, when we, the Sandokai, the Sandokai says, light and dark are just like the front and back foot in walking.

[07:24]

Light and dark are dichotomies that balance each other. They actually epitomize duality. So how can you have enlightenment, an enlightenment that epitomizes duality? That wouldn't be right. So Dogen in the Genjo Koan says right at the beginning, he says, when you have enlightenment or when you have dharma, then you have realization and you have delusion and you have birth and you have death. realizing that there is no abiding self in any of these. There's no enlightenment. There's no... I'm paraphrasing, of course. But the point is, he's saying, there's no enlightenment, no realization, and no delusion.

[08:28]

And the great way is going beyond... Either one. It's going beyond duality and going beyond oneness. Even to say oneness is dualistic. So Buddha is sitting. This is a great practice. Sitting. So Buddha takes up the practice and says with this sense of resolve whatever this is is just going to sit here and face whatever it is.

[09:33]

Fundamental question comes up in the legend about the sitting practice of Chakyamuni, fundamental question, you know, is it better to be doing something else? You know, what about going off? So he'd tried various things, right? He'd tried various ways of satisfying desires. and tried various ways of renunciation and it became clear that a great practice was to be still with everything so being still with everything then who knows what happens but each of us here knows what happens various tendencies come up

[10:38]

it's not easy to be present right here. And there may come a great doubt about is it fundamentally okay, I can say, just to be right here, to live and die right here. to have the whole experience of birth and death? Is it fundamentally okay to have the whole experience of birth and death? Which we all say, inherit as human beings. So the decision as human beings to make a decision to be a human being is to accept this birth and death.

[11:51]

To receive this life knowing that it's impermanent. Knowing that this life includes death. So is that okay to be still and fully understanding that. Noticing all the smaller issues, distractions, wishes, and not being diverted by them. So pretty difficult. So in the legend of Shakyamuni, this thought arises, maybe I don't have the right to be here.

[13:00]

Or it's said that Mara comes up and says, what gives you the right to be here? Shakyamuni reaches his right hand down and touches the earth. Now, when I talk about this with my wife, Lane, she's well-versed in the significance of goddesses. And there is an image actually in the Asian Art Museum. There's an image of when Buddha touches the earth. This is carved in one of the bas-relief sculptures there. Buddha touching the earth. Underneath, in the earth, there's a goddess reaching up and touching Buddha's finger touching the earth.

[14:10]

There's this recognition that the earth then, and so according to the legend, the earth vibrates, the earth resonates. Yes. Yes. Many interpretations of that are possible. But this recognition, I think this is this practice of humility practice of okay this is being acknowledging being of the earth and at the same time being independent so the earth has offered this life this independence So the earth has offered the life of the teacup to be the teacup.

[15:24]

The earth has offered this life, this body, to be this body. So with that, the Buddha happens. Awakening happens. Now I want to try to put this together with a poem from Rumi and Dogan for fun here. So this is Yeah. This is Rumi, translated by Coleman Barks.

[16:27]

Probably many of you know this. This is the one called the Sunrise Ruby. In the early morning hour, just before dawn, Lover and Beloved awake and take a drink of water. Lover asks, do you love me or yourself more? Really, tell the absolute truth. Beloved responds, there's nothing left of me. I'm like a ruby held up to the sunrise. Is it still a stone or a world made of redness? It has no resistance to sunlight. This is how Halaj said, I am God and told the truth.

[17:38]

The ruby and the sunrise are one. Be courageous and discipline yourself. Completely become hearing and ear and wear this sun ruby as an earring. Work. Keep digging your well. Don't even think about getting off from work. Water is there somewhere. Submit to a daily practice. Your loyalty to that is a ring on the door. Keep knocking and the joy inside will eventually open a window and look out to see who's there. So this is Rumi understanding the relationship of everyday practice

[18:48]

and the generosity involved in giving up me. Who's the lover and who's the beloved? Lover asks, do you love me or yourself more? So here this this practice, there is truth telling here, right? And there is this, there's some wonderful choices of words in here. There's truth. There's be courageous. So it's completely becoming Simply hearing, it says, completely become hearing.

[19:52]

And then you can adorn it. It helps maybe to have some adornment to remember what there is to hear and what there is to see. So in Dogen's actually he talks about the point of Zazen and he talks about various misunderstandings of Zazen and then he talks about true understanding of Zazen coming from Hongshu Zhengzhuay and and so he quotes Hongshu's poem which is sometimes translated acupuncture needle of Zazen and or sometimes then it's just the point of Zazen

[21:15]

But in it, it's talking about... So I'll read that, actually. But right now I'm trying to decide which translation. I have a couple translations right here. So, the essential function of all Buddhas, the functional essence of all ancestors, is to know without touching things and illuminate without encountering objects. Knowing without touching things, this knowledge is innately subtle. Illuminating without encountering objects, this illumination is innately miraculous. The knowledge innately subtle has never engaged in discriminative thinking. The illumination innately miraculous has never displayed the slightest identification.

[22:23]

Never engaging in discriminative thinking, this illumination is complete without grasping. The water is clear right down to the bottom. Fish swim lazily on. The sky is vast without end. birds fly far into the distance. So, this, the first sentence is here, the essential function of all Buddhas and the functional essence of all ancestors could also be translated as the hub, hub of Buddha's activity or the turning of Ancestors Hub, or the turning of realization. So then, Dogen's very respectfully gives quite a lot of commentary on Hongzhi's poem, but then he offers his own.

[23:37]

So he says, this is a translation by Kaz Tanahashi and Philip Whelan and and Dogen actually says says this he says more than 80 years have passed since the time of Zheng Zhui after his text I have written my version so this is Dogen's version the hub of Buddha's activity the turning of the ancestor's hub moves along with your non-thinking and is completed in the realm of non-merging. As it moves along with your non-thinking, its emergence is immediate. As it is completed in the realm of non-merging, completeness itself

[24:44]

is realization. When its emergence is intimate there is no separateness. When completeness reveals itself it is neither real nor apparent. When there is immediacy without separateness immediacy is dropping away with no obstacle. Realization beyond real or apparent is effort without desire. Clear water all the way to the ground, a fish swims like a fish. Vast sky transparent throughout, a bird flies like a bird. And after that, Dogen comments, although Zheng Shui's text is not incomplete.

[25:45]

Zazen may also be spoken of in this way. All descendants of Buddha ancestors should practice Zazen as the single great matter. So the hub of Buddha's activity, turning of the ancestors hub, moves along with your non-thinking. moves along with your non-thinking. So this is, it's really a good thing, actually, that it's not dependent on your thinking. Not dependent on thinking. This activity of awakening is beyond the, say, manipulations of the mind. Beyond conceptions of the mind.

[26:47]

And it says, it's completed in the realm of non-merging. Very interesting. Usually we would think, if there's disconnection, things are not complete. Here he's saying, this is complete. In the realm of non-merging. Sometimes we chant, okay, merging. Merging is wonderful. Merging is auspicious. But don't become attached to that. Don't think that merging is it. It's wonderful to feel the intimacy of merging. It's wonderful simply to hear the sound of the creek. without separation from it. To hear the sound of the creek as with the mind stopped completely still.

[27:53]

Wonderful. And yet that's not it. There's mind. There's creek. There's ear. There are many, many, many, many parts involved. Separate, independent parts that are all, say, synchronized in that stillness. So this activity, the hub of awakening, that's Buddha's activity, so this is, Buddha means awakening, right? So Buddha's awakening activity, this is moving with your non-thinking. And what happens with thinking is it tends to freeze it. Thinking tends to freeze little images or little understandings of Buddha's great activity.

[28:59]

Everything I'm saying now is a little frozen little scraps. Buddha's great activity is moving throughout. So then he says, okay, as it is like this, as it moves along with your non-thinking, its emergence is immediate. Since it's moving along with non-thinking, emergence is immediate, instantaneous. There's actually no hesitation in the entire dynamic working of the universe. No hesitation. Everything is immediate. Immediate also has a sense of being very close. It could say intimate. It's the emergence that it appears as separate is also intimate.

[30:09]

Not separate. Same time. The way it is with everything. As it is completed in the realm of non-merging, it's already complete. Completeness itself is realization. Completeness itself is realization. This is the sense of Shakyamuni saying everything awakens simultaneously. The great earth all the myriad phenomena awaken simultaneously. This is complete. Nothing is left out. So then this translation uses the word intimate. When its emergence is intimate, there's no separateness. So this is This is a little redundant right here.

[31:11]

When completeness reveals itself, it is neither real nor apparent. So this refers back to the whole five modes of Dengshan, the real and the apparent. And of course, it refers back beyond that. But this, when completeness completeness reveals itself. When we have enlightenment, when we have Buddha, we might think it's real. You might think, oh, now this is real. But Dogen's going beyond this, saying it's neither real nor apparent. It's not in the category of real or apparent. As soon as you make it into a category, it's not that. So completeness is also incomplete.

[32:16]

Completeness includes incomplete. When there is immediacy without separateness immediacy without separateness immediacy is dropping away. No obstacle. Then this key line realization is beyond real or apparent is effort without desire. So this is the practice of realization. This practice of zazen, being not real or apparent, this practice of zazen is always going beyond. itself, going beyond realization. And this is the part that's hard for us, I think.

[33:20]

To make effort without desire. To make effort without any expectation. Actually, when you realize it's not your effort, then that effort is say... Whose effort is it? Can't say whose effort it is. Whose life is it? So when the question is, do you love me or yourself more? Whose effort is it? If one's involved in loving me, then that actually is constricting the great effort, the great flow of energy.

[34:26]

So to drop the me is to open up to a more complete effort. it's actually a lot less work. It's a lot less work not to be involved so much with me. And so there's a kind of discipline in that. There's a kind of discipline in knowing that, okay, to be true to something that's bigger than me. Last night we had the Bodhisattva ceremony, and the whole ceremony is about that. The whole ceremony is about being true to something that's bigger than me. And it's pretty difficult. This time of year is, I think, especially difficult.

[35:35]

Here it is. We have... What's today? The 11th. We have 10 more days of getting darker. Things get darker. The Hopi are in their kivas watching the shadow. Still some Hopi. Watching the mark where the shadow comes across the room at the winter solstice. And the shadow Every day the shadow gets farther and farther and we know that it's getting darker and darker every day. Because of this, we need to do various rituals. We need to participate to encourage the sun to return. If we don't do these rituals, who knows what will happen.

[36:38]

The days will get shorter and shorter endlessly until there's no more light at all. People watch this and it affects people. There's an acronym S.A.D. Seasonal Affective Disorder. We make it very heavily affected by it so that I cannot function and get through the day then it's at the level of a disorder but even if it's not at the level of a disorder and I still kind of can make it through the day it affects me so I know that the dark time of the year is difficult and

[37:39]

I was in Texas in September. And I asked some people what they were worried about. And some people actually said they were already worried about the holidays, worried about Thanksgiving and Christmas. And there were some people, maybe none here, but there were some people that in Austin, Texas, who were worried about having to be happy. Having to be happy at Thanksgiving and Christmas when they didn't actually expect they would feel happy, but that they were expected to appear to be happy. And this was already a burden in September, right? Oh, God. I don't know if I want to go and visit my family during Thanksgiving and have to be happy, right? And then people buy a lot of stuff, right?

[38:49]

There's a whole, you know, I'd say propaganda, manipulation of this feeling. Oh, yeah, you better buy stuff. So, maybe if you buy the right stuff, Buy the right thing and give it to someone and they'll be happy. Or if you get what you want for Christmas, you'll be happy. I don't know. That may stop. I think it's... I don't know. I give up. Ah, thank you. Can Santa Claus do it? Can Santa Claus make people happy?

[39:53]

Yeah. So it's hard to be a humble being, realizing how much I'm even affected by a few degrees change in temperature. So I think, oh yeah, I'll be happy when it's 70 degrees, right? But now it's only 40 degrees. Is it okay to be this being right now when it's 40 degrees? Is it okay to... be born and die right here at 40 degrees. I remember Katagiri was a big deal. He was living in the Bay Area and there was this invitation to go and move to Minnesota.

[41:00]

And people were telling him, it's cold. It's cold in Minnesota. And he would come back and visit and give some Dharma talks or do a Sashin. I don't know, at least for some years after that move. And I remember him once talking about his, for him to meet the cold. He set himself this task on a I think it was below zero, right? Day. And there's a lake. And he walked around the lake. And then he said, cold? It's not cold. It's just tingling. Just tingling.

[42:00]

Okay. So just meeting that sensation, just that tingling. So it's hard to just meet the tingling, you know. Not make it something more, not make it something less. It's hard to let go of enlightenment, you know. when you have enlightenment. You might think, oh, this is enlightenment. And then want to hold on to it. So this is Dogen saying, always going beyond Buddha. Or if you think, oh, this is really a sad feeling I have I'm feeling really really I have an ache here I don't know and I don't like it you know but to be willing to meet that as awakening to meet the sad feeling and to investigate that what is it

[43:38]

What's the actual feeling? Is it a tingling? Is it like a heavy weight in the body? Is it okay to be there, right there with that? Is it okay to be this kind of Buddha, to be awake as afraid of the dark Buddha? to be afraid of Thanksgiving, afraid of the holidays, Buddha. So this awakening is not limited to some particular state. So even if I can't get out of my dream, even if I can't get out of my dream, Buddha shows up.

[45:20]

practice of effort without desire. This practice of effort without desire is the same. So this is a pretty very important point to investigate carefully. Effort without desire. Usually we think of effort. It's hard to think of effort without desire. Usually we make effort being driven by some desire. The effort to even have a particular kind of thought. The effort to form a thought driven by some desire. So what does Dogen mean when he says effort without desire? The realization beyond This realization.

[46:24]

This Buddha's activity. This is Buddha's activity. Effort without desire. So it's a kind of a mistake in practice to have some expectation. Oh. Some people might say, oh, I've been practicing for nine years. still, I get upset. So I say, well, you should practice 10 years. Better make it 20 years. Make it 20 years. Then you can come back and say, now I've been practicing 20 years. until I get upset so this expectation of oh if I do this and this and this then I will not then I will not have anger arise anymore well you can do that kind of practice

[47:51]

And that actually makes realization smaller. Oh, there's a kind of realization that you can have where you don't get angry anymore. This is kind of special. And Suzuki Roshi's way is nothing special. No state, no particular place where, oh, you don't have to deal with something anymore and yet when you're willing to do the practice of effort without desire willing to do that practice then your life is no problem willing to do effort without desire is liberating Liberating beyond liberating.

[48:57]

No problem. No expectation. Maybe big difficulty. But no problem. If I can use the words like that. Fundamentally no problem. And yet, every moment, some difficulty. And the difficulty is the opportunity to be alive. Oh. So not turning away from what presents itself as difficulty, not turning away from it is, this is the opportunity to be alive, to wake up. And often when you don't turn away from difficulty, you can be helpful, actually.

[50:09]

Very directly, immediately helpful. Not turning away from difficulty. Accepting what is. Seeing it clearly. Taking into account a tendency to flinch, turn away. maybe overcoming something to see what it is and becoming intimate, then it's easier to be helpful. And this is helping internally with all the different things going on in this body and mind and the environment around, helping the environment around. So this is actually becoming one with surroundings.

[51:16]

So this effort of becoming completely still is to not move away from anything. Not move toward something and not move away from something. to be willing to be completely and fully still present, including all the fears, including all feelings, with the confidence that Buddha's awakening The mind of awakening is big enough to include it all. In fact, it already includes it all. And this present manifestation is the place to engage.

[52:26]

There's a kind of confidence in the thought that, okay, whatever arises has to arise. Whatever arises has to arise. All the causes and conditions at play at this moment, at this time. Enabling awareness to happen. Awareness happens meeting something, releasing something. Meeting it completely, there's no resistance, and so it's released in meeting it completely, like Rumi said, the sunlight going right through the ruby, going right through stone. No resistance. So tomorrow we go into a silent day.

[53:40]

No talking tonight. Again, I invite people to sit. If you concentrate today and let go of anything extra, You let go of anything extra all day long, then you have energy to sit. I know that's not possible. You can't do it. You can't sit, Zazen. Sunlight, sunlight, Zazen. darkness sits out in. So, fortunately, we do have this practice sitting here and kind of just stewing in our own juices endlessly.

[54:55]

Becoming very familiar. Everything is I'd say there's a deep friendship that's here that then is discovered and rediscovered and resisted. There's annoyance and then some resolution. Or maybe no resolution. Just more annoyance. Okay. Thank you for listening. Please continue. Thank you for listening to this podcast offered by the San Francisco Zen Center. Our Dharma Talks are offered free of charge and this is made possible by the donations we receive.

[56:04]

Your financial support helps us to continue to offer the Dharma. For more information, visit sfcc.org and click giving.

[56:12]

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