This podcast is offered by the San Francisco Zen Center on the web at www.sfzz.org. Our public programs are made possible by donations from people like you. Good morning. So here we are, more or less on the brink of Shashin. It's a very interesting moment. We've all done this before, but here we are again. How did that happen? Didn't you learn last time?

[01:01]

That go off? Is it still working? It is? Is that light enough over there? Do you hear Yoshi okay? Yeah? In some ways, Sashin, as is the heart of our practice, Zen practice, remarkably simple. It's a process in continuous contact with what's happening. A way in which that continuous contact discovers the moment, engages the moment, and allows the moment

[02:03]

have more authority than the commentary we have about it, whether it's an understanding, an associated thought, or feeling, or image. And that as we immerse in that process, the very constructs that arise from that commentary and create the self start to loosen up. And as they start to loosen up, a different sense of reality is apprehended. Dugan Zenji says in Bendawa, This is what has, this process is what has been communicated from Buddha to Buddha, from ancestor to ancestor, to practitioner to practitioner.

[03:16]

And in a way, we transmit this to ourselves. Because without that, shared experience of opening beyond the constructs of self. We can't understand each other. It's what arises when we open like that that creates the ground of our shared experience. Dogen says, there's two qualities. And then he says, this arises from which Kaz Tanahashi translates as receptive samadhi. I think the word awareness is pretty good.

[04:25]

You know, when you read through Dogen's fascicles, he has an endless repertoire of terms that he puts in there. The king of king samadhis. The mind of the southern prince, southern prince is Shakyamuni. The mind of the snowy peaks, the Himalayas. Maybe his abundance of terms can help us go beyond the vocabulary we insist the world should fit in. But there's also an agency in discovering the intimate language of your own process of awareness.

[05:28]

as it settles in goes beyond words that moment of connected concentrated singing where there is both what's arising in the field of vision and full awareness of the process of seeing It illustrates. It exemplifies. Dogen Zenji says, it's unfabricated and wondrous. It isn't simply something you manufactured because of your diligent effort or because of your agenda.

[06:38]

It's something that we open to and it comes into being. It's wondrous because it's almost like magic. One moment we're in the thralls about existence. And then the next, the sign of the Blue Jays becomes completely itself. Go ahead. A little slow on their cue there. sign of the Blue Jays becomes itself in being aware of what we're aware of when we're aware it becomes not only evident but we feel its wisdom

[08:08]

Something in his realizes this is what consciousness is capable of. So here's my task this morning that I made up for myself. I don't know exactly how many days there are left to this practice period, but I suspect it could be counted on the fingers of your hands. And so this way in which such a captivating notion could

[09:15]

Make this immediacy elusive. Even worse, make it unappealing. What could be more delicious than the freedom that will arise when those gates fling open and the world is at your feet? things you've yearned for. And yet we didn't come here to rush out the gate when it was over. We came here to be here. We came here because even though each of us has faced and experienced the difficulties of practice.

[10:23]

There's something about it that's both compelling and despite its difficulties appealing. Something in us wants to do this. And I'd be even bolder and say something in us wants to do this more than anything else in our lives. And when we taste and touch and feel and see that heart of practice, it instructs how we live because something in us wants to live. we have our own genius of commentary.

[11:38]

Our repertoire of adjectives that can arise in a flash for any and every situation. We have these tugs on our attention our ways of hesitating strategizing can we create a ground that's so that it can hold all that our human life presents, all that our individuated consciousness brings forth. It can just be part of the mix.

[12:54]

So as we start indecision to renew our vow, to remind ourselves. Dogen Zenji says, the reminding starts with citta. It starts with this discriminating faculty of consciousness. We remind ourselves that this practice has a mysterious allure for us. Of course we have lots of complaints. The people we have to practice with, what a terrible, awful bunch. And this hierarchical process,

[13:59]

Surely a perversion on the path of freedom. But how to get in touch with that which our commitment. How to watch that mind that says these strategies have worked in the past. We are entering the unknown. And that's what makes it so delicious.

[15:02]

If this was a mere repeat of a previous machine, how utterly tedious. What an extraordinary disappointment it would be. But this stepping into the unknown and to do it as a continual process of experience, to do it as a continuous process of experiential learning. We spend so much time immersed in what happens between our ears, we don't quite realize that's a very odd state of affairs. Forget that entering the path of experiencing opens up the world.

[16:08]

The lotus flowers bloom. How to remind ourselves. Often it's a feeling. Often it has this flavor of the wondrous. This wondrous authority that we're all completely capable of just by experiencing what's in the moment. And how can this process of experiential engagement, how can we stay close to it?

[17:28]

How can it become the constant companion for whatever arises in the mind and the heart. You know, this practice period I've been trying to present Dugan Zenji's teaching of Jiji Uzamai. in a way, it's very simple. It's just receptive awareness. And just receptive awareness is extraordinary. As we experience the experience of

[18:32]

commentary starts to loosen up. The commentary starts to become quiet. And experiencing the experience invites consciousness into a different modality. It invites consciousness into not knowing. The commentary of our mind has within it implicit definitions of reality, of what is. And they have whatever impact they have upon us. In this direct experience, they start to unpeel. And as they unpeel, something wondrously arises.

[19:41]

And then the question of our sitting is, what is it? How is it that that way of engaging is enacted moment by moment. In the yoga of teaching, we learn experiential engagement both by doing it and by how it imprints in our being. It's like our moments of concentration, our moments of direct experience reveal something in their happening. Both as we set our intention, it's inviting us to connect intimately to what our body already knows about practice, to what our breath already knows about practice, to what that releasing of the mind, whether you want to call it renunciation or awakening or anything else,

[21:34]

had these moments, they're embedded in our being. So as we enter sashim, in a way, we're entering into the feeling of sashim, the mental disposition. the engaging the body. As awareness starts to infuse the body, it becomes less a list of anatomical parts that our mind knows. And it becomes more sensorium of experience.

[22:43]

And as we open up to that that sensate experience has its own energy. Now as we open up to that and cast off the scaffolding that our constructive mind has set up for reality, as we open up there's an adjustment. Maybe the mind becomes drowsy, foggy. To not succumb to that.

[23:51]

To try opening your eyes, Linda. Yeah, that'll help. You too, Lucy. Try opening your eyes. Keep your eyes open. as we open up the sensate experience the way our commentary has kept us energized starts to dissipate has kept us orientated okay this is what is As we let that go, it does, when we look at it neurologically, it covers some of the same territory as going to sleep. And often as we move into Sashin, this is territory we sail through.

[25:02]

Letting go of one way. of holding things together and letting another way be energized. Yogurtly speaking, directed attention. In the lore of Zazen, attending to the uprightness of the body. Noticing that opening the body upwards stimulates. And similarly with the breath. Letting the breath have a more deliberate involvement.

[26:07]

So our vow, our intention, manifests itself in the body and in the breath. Because usually what our body and our mind know about practice from their own realizations is not so available to the mind of usual consciousness. As the mind saddles and opens, then these knowings become more available. So we enter in this way. We enter with the humility of returning to basics. We enter

[27:11]

with the diligence of beginner's mind. It doesn't matter if we've done a thousand sessions. We're all starting over. We're all beginning. And each thing that arises for us is its own coin. If the mind is relentlessly persistent with some issue, what is skillful practice with that? If the mind is clouding over with drowsiness, what is skillful practice with that? And as Dogen Zenji teaches, the preface for this is the primary function of awareness, to wake up, to experience.

[28:25]

Whatever technique we pick up as an expression of khan, of sitting and awakening, it's just a technique. It doesn't have a goal in itself. we're always exploring the condition that we are in at that moment. So specifically I would suggest, explore as you set up your posture, explore this sensate way of being. Whether you want to say to yourself, don't know the body, experience what it is. Whether you want to follow the experience into an expression of energy.

[29:43]

This can sometimes open the mind. This can invite the mind to not knowing. Because in the realm of sensation, in the realm of energy, Concepts don't apply. Judging success or failure doesn't apply. And our directed attention, it instructs us. It creates access. But beyond access, it also helps us start to remember, and it helps us remember those moments of connection.

[31:00]

And it also helps us awaken the senses. So I directed attention in Zazen makes available, opens up receptive attention. It's like it creates the grind of now, and that grind of now opens to well-being. that I was reading from Nangaku and Master Ma. Master Ma says, well, how do I do this? If it's not something I manufacture, how do I make my effort?

[32:03]

And then the piece I left out was Master Ma, or Nangaku says, this being body, being breath, it's creating the ground of being. This ground of being opens up and is receptive to the Dharma of being. It opens up and what arises becomes evident. The Dharma of Being isn't that then we create a bunch of concepts about it. The Dharma of Being is that the territory of experiencing becomes evident.

[33:16]

Maybe we could say it's be aware, you're aware, when you're aware as it becomes fuller each object that arises is completely itself okay sort of have this impression that I'm humbling on you, saying nonsensical things that the heart of which you know completely. But still, as we enter Shashin, this way of engaging becomes so

[34:21]

even as the inevitable or activity of mind and heart come up, they're illuminated by the grind of awareness rather than they obscure the grind of awareness. So I would say, especially as we're settling into Shashin, this diligence, but not harsh, Can there be a diligence that has, along with it, a relaxation? Along with it, a nothing special. Along with it, nothing to attain. This quality of not knowing. But especially as we're settling in, the diligence helps the transition and the awakening of the energy of awareness.

[35:42]

Okay. What's it like to be a human? Bird asked. I myself don't know. It's being held a prisoner by your skin while reaching infinity. Like being captive, being a captive of your scrap of time while touching eternity. Being hopelessly uncertain and helplessly hopeful. being a needle of frost and a handful of heat, breathing in the air and choking wordlessly. It's being on fire with a nest made of ashes, eating bread while filling up on hunger. It's dying without love, it's loving through death.

[36:53]

That's funny, said the bird. and flew away effortlessly. What's it like to be human, asked the bird. I myself don't know. It's being held prisoner by your skin while reaching infinity, being a captive of your scrap of time while touching eternity. being hopelessly uncertain and helplessly hopeful, being a needle of frost and a handful of heat, breathing in the air and choking wordlessly. It's being on fire with a nest made of ashes, eating bread while filling up on hunger. It's dying without love and loving through death.

[37:56]

That's funny, said the bird, and flew off effortlessly. We know the human condition. We've lived it all our life. We're not fooled by it. even though the activities of our mind and our behaviors seem to indicate we are. But how can that one that's not fooled keep the vow of practice close by? So to continue answering in the yoga of energy, our diligent effort to try to carry that with you throughout the day.

[39:23]

I noticed when Alex was reading, the admonitions last night he described the exercise period and he said you can do this you can do this or you can rest but I'd say what we were hoping to communicate there was if you literally feel too tired to do anything then rest that's fine But that's different from, I can't be bothered doing anything. If you're too tired to do anything, resting will have its own samadhi. If you can't be bothered doing anything, resting will be restless. Because there's some discontent, there's some pushing away.

[40:32]

So please, if you need to rest, rest. But don't take that option just as some expression of aversion. The hope is that whatever you engage in, in that period of time, the territory of the yoga of body and breath that allows them to become access to this grind of being so whatever you do can you do it with mindfulness of body and breath to carry that with you, whatever you do, on your breaks.

[41:39]

If it seems prudent on your break to lie down, lie down. The process of experiential learning enhanced by repetition. I think in a way pretty much everything I've said this morning you've heard before and most of it you already knew. But there's something about hearing something for the first time even though cognitively you're aware of it. Can it resonate in your being? This is don't know mind.

[42:50]

This is beginner's mind. Can it resonate in your being? So that when the next time you bring directed attention to the breath, It's more a process of discovery than enforcing your body to behave a certain way. And starting to explore what continuous awareness is throughout the day. So please, please remember the preciousness of practice, the preciousness of this opportunity.

[44:09]

Having engaged in the whole practice period, your body and mind are aligned with the process of practice. Maybe it doesn't feel that way. It's not always evident to us what we're immersed in. But engaged in that way, this mind grind that opens up to the Dharma is close. course it will be tempting when those thoughts and images of something called after this arise. But how unfortunate if the preciousness of this opportunity is lost.

[45:20]

Please touch that place that knows this heart of practice. Touch that place that knows this heart of practice is what guides a human life. Touch that place that knows the heart of practice that guides a human life. is what connects us to our life it's how we help others you know with with that connection we will discover within the circumstances how to be of service to ourselves and others without that connection our life will always be awkward and difficult to manage.

[46:33]

So this. So please, find that and offer it to everyone else you're sitting with. We're so sensitive in sashimi. Your dedicated effort ripples through the room. The way you walk in the door to your seat reminds everyone about practice. Thank you. Thank you for listening to this podcast offered by the San Francisco Zen Center. Our Dharma talks are offered free of charge and this is made possible by the donations we receive. Your financial support helps us to continue to offer the Dharma. For more information, visit SSCC.org and click Giving.

[47:40]

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