This podcast is offered by the San Francisco Zen Center on the web at www.sfzc.org. Our public programs are made possible by donations from people like you. Good evening. I've been trying to avoid this kind of tennis match effect. Here it is. I'm not going to talk for very long. I just realized this afternoon at the work meeting that this is three nights in a row without any zazen. So what I thought I'd do, I'll just talk for about 20 minutes or so and then we can just switch over to zazen and end the evening like that. And maybe that's fitting since what I'd like to talk about, as I mentioned last night, is zazen. But I'd also like to say, for me, the whole process of last night was very heartening.

[01:03]

The monastic process is a collective process. And somehow that sitting more or less in a circle and everyone taking turns at reading part of what we were reading, It felt wonderfully inclusive. So thank you for that. And I hope it's indicative of how we practice together for this practice period and for countless eons. In a way, Shingi, like Sila, sets the stage. for the essential act of awakening, and it also expresses the essential act of awakening. This is its dual role. And not surprisingly, this was one of Dogen Zenji's key teachings, practice realization.

[02:19]

While you're doing it, you're not preparing for some conclusion later, the very act of how you do it, how you wake up in the doing of it, is the conclusion. And then so how do we bring that into Zazen? When you look at the scope of Zen texts, There are quite a wide variety of techniques. When you look even further to Buddhism, then you get an enormous variety of techniques. But since we're so-called Zen, we'll stick to that. All in the service of... the momentary experience being thoroughly engaged so thoroughly engaged there's no self separate from it and in that thorough engagement consciousness is illuminated in that illumination

[03:51]

reveals the Dharma. In its essence, that Dharma is beyond thinking. It doesn't express itself as formulated concepts. As it's actualized through activity, then it becomes a formulation. So in some ways this can seem like an irrelevant idea or a beautiful idea, but an idea. And the challenge for us is how can this guide our engagement in the process of zazen? Listen to this formulation of meditation.

[05:00]

Directing attention, stabilizing the mind, renewing attention, staying with the meditation object, taming the mind, calming the mind, gathering into oneness and samadhi. A sort of sequential process. And yet, almost all of us, the process of our being doesn't give itself over to such a linear sequence. The process of our being moves in a variety of ways. In some Buddhist traditions there is significant emphasis on your pre-meditation preparation.

[06:15]

There's a training, an education, a purification of a manner of speaking that brings about a stabilization that affords this kind of unfolding. And this is not exactly our way. In a way we could say the shingi, the sila and the precepts, they are the surround, they are the container within which our individual consciousness, our karmic accretions as we sit and they unfold as they unwind in the spaciousness of Zazen that these two things are happening together we're being supported and guided by this container and within that container something is unfolding sometimes delightful inspiring

[07:33]

revelatory, sometimes utterly confusing, painful, and mysterious. So how in the midst of that, given that is the nature of how we set up our practice, we set the container, and we immerse within it. We immerse into this unfolding of individual consciousness into collective consciousness. And the very nature of it is the karmic attributes of individual consciousness will reveal themselves. will manifest themselves so the challenge is how in the midst of that do we sustain the steady effort the steady process that enables liberation rather than just

[09:02]

recreates the karmic tendencies that are arising. This is the question. How do we engage in a way that we're not simply reenacting, reinforcing, embellishing the karmic arisings? Often initially, the process of Zazen has a flavor of separating from that entanglement, from that compelling engrossing arising. So there needs to be some determined, deliberate, sustained effort. unsound object.

[10:06]

Traditionally, the object is posture. The object is breath in the body. And then there are variations. There's even variations within that, but then there's variations in what it might be in addition to that. And what I'd like to do, rather than elaborate on that, and I hope I will, and I hope you will too as we look at it in the class, look at some of the traditions, but what I'd like to just talk about for the next ten minutes is the kind of effort that is entailed in this process. As we take up a technique, it's almost seductive for the technique to be an end in itself.

[11:12]

In Zen Mind, Beginner's Mind, Suzuki Roshi says, focus on your breathing, but not too much. Don't make focusing on your breath some goal that you have to attain. The object, the technique is an agent in the process of waking up. Our vow, our intention, our engagement in Zazen is like a straight line. Can it stay continuous? steady and in relationship to that straight line the variations of human consciousness the paying attention the becoming absorbed in it the getting distracted the having an emotional response the trying to control it the trying to avoid it

[12:30]

all these arisings as we zigzag in relationship to this straight line of intentional practice. So, of course, if we get lost in our own meanderings, we're lost. There's no contact. There's no arising, awakening. So there is this initiating diligence. And the marvelous thing about this environment, the marvelous thing about the amount of zazen and the frequency of zazen we're going to do, this initiation is not so far away. And in some ways, That's a marvelous help.

[13:35]

And then in a subtle way, it's a hindrance. The subtle hindrance is you can take it for granted. You sit down. You're sort of present. You're sort of concentrated. And you've got a little wiggle room. You can think a little bit. You can space out a little bit. You're not going too far. And guess what? Pretty soon the period's over and it wasn't too bad. Didn't hurt very much. You know, I was saying last night, it's difficult. The difficulty is to hold yourself to a standard. And to hold yourself to a standard in a way that doesn't become rigid and demanding.

[14:38]

As you enact that standard, as you stay on that straight line, whatever arises, whatever your being brings forth, is brought into consciousness. That kind of effort, that kind of engagement, it has the dedication, but it has a kind of receptivity as well. So on one hand, don't just sit there and sort of do it and cruise through the period. Bring your best effort, but don't let the technique become a goal in itself, let it be an agent. Let me give you an example. In following the breath, it's my own notion, and I think there's lots of evidence to support it, that in the Zen tradition, the primary way to follow the breath is in the abdomen.

[16:02]

You know, it links into our chanting, it links into how we carry mindfulness of the body into activity. But in following the breath, in following the breath in the abdomen, this, like many objects of meditation, can become both challenging to stay focused, to stay connected. And as such, to meet that challenge requires diligent effort. As we engage in it, we discover there is a lot to learn. The breath and the body is a whole school of education.

[17:06]

Prajnatara, and I think it's like the fourth case of the Book of Serenity. The king passing says to Prajnatara, well, you just sit there and don't you study any sutras? And Prajnatara says, I study the sutra of the breath. hundreds and thousands and thousands of times a marvelous sentiment and yet as an agent to awakening not as an end in itself the incoming breath How can it be experienced as opening, engaging the arising moment without preference, without hesitation?

[18:12]

The outgoing breath. How can it be experienced as releasing, letting everything fall away, holding on to nothing, sweeping clear the... karmic activity of the moment how can the pause be experienced as the transition between releasing and allowing this ever-changing nature of existence it's not a steady state it's a dynamic state In that kind of attending to the breath, there's both purposeful, directed attention and there's receptive attention.

[19:19]

And they operate in relationship to how settled or unsettled the mind is at that particular period. Or maybe even that particular part of the period. When thoughts arise, when images arise, when memories arise, when anticipations arise, they become part of the tapestry. They become part of the texture of the breath. They become part of the texture of the moment. The mind, the attentiveness, is pliable, adaptable. The breath and the arising thought are not different.

[20:25]

The sense of being does not have a definite contained boundary. The interdependence of what is, is being lived. The marks of shanyata are arising, becoming evident, becoming actualized and experienced in the breath. So yes, it's asking for full attention. It's asking for a diligent effort. But it's not narrow.

[21:42]

It doesn't have preset goal. It's not contained by a concept that says, this is what needs to happen. It's an opening. It's a giving over. So in working with the breath, this is how the effort is refined and just the way Shingi sets the stage creates the container and expresses practice realization similarly with the details of the breath sets the stage creates the container manifests

[22:48]

the expression. And just to blow your minds a little bit more, as Dogen Zenji says, and this is not a process that's apprehended by perception. This is not something your mind figures out. This is not something your mind sets up. commentary, a definition. This is a giving over. This is this mysterious process where you read some Zen thing and you think, what the heck is that? And then you sit Zazen and maybe a year or two later you pick it up And guess what?

[23:48]

It's starting to make sense. How did that happen? So this kind of effort. Directed, fluid, adaptable. How do we sustain that? How do we let it hold the range of activities and experiences that will arise for us in any day? How can that effort flow from situation, situation, from state of mind to state of mind? This is a challenge. And then for each of us to work with what arises.

[24:56]

Do you have intense, difficult emotions? Do you have a great sense of joy and gratitude? Does your body feel like liquid energy? Or does it feel like an old bag of bones that needs oiling? Or even more mysteriously, does it move back and forth? This concept of way-seeking mind. As whatever arises, how is it engaged with this kind of effort that becomes an agent in revealing the Dharma?

[26:03]

And one of the initiating factors is... an inner stimulus. How do we encourage ourselves to be inclined in this way? How do we encourage ourselves to be more curious about revealing the Dharma than we are about reliving the concerns and agitations and desires? our karmic life no matter how well crafted the shingi it can't replace that inner spark you know this this is a deeply personal and intimate matter you know how does something in in each one of us keep turning us back

[27:15]

this curiosity of engagement as those of you have had the misfortune of practicing with me before you know I like to use the phrases what's happening now and how do you practice with it so is the minds more settled in Zazen this is A non-cognitive process. But in the process of the day, making it cognitive can be helpful. Just acknowledging, okay, this is what's going on. These thoughts are going through my mind. It's stimulating these kinds of descriptions of reality. They're evoking these kinds of feelings. Okay. Now, what is it to practice with all that? but still stimulating this kind of curious, adaptive engagement.

[28:30]

Not inviting a rigid good and bad, right and wrong, us and them response. It's asking us to pause and dip down into what brought us here dip down into why it is we're doing this practice and let that inform what it is to practice with it and we we exercise this muscle and as we exercise it It's closer. It's more available. It's not just an exotic notion that comes up on rare occasions when we're feeling very zen. It becomes just part of what we're doing.

[29:38]

Um... And I would say, if you could say, the Shingi makes us one body, I would say this kind of effort is the heartbeat of that body. And this curiosity, this inquiry, enlivens the mind. And that enlivened mind is less likely to turn the request of practice into something wooden and rigid and mechanical. When your effort becomes wooden and rigid and mechanical,

[30:50]

sort of go to sleep. Or you think of something during Zaza and to entertain yourself, whether you intend to or not. So this kind of engaging breath, I'm over my time, so I'm going to stop. But here's a little bit of Mary Oliver. There's always time for that. What is the name? What is the name of the deep breath I would take over and over for all of us? What is the name of the deep breath I would take over and over for all of us? Call it whatever you want. happiness and it is another way another one of the ways to enter fire of course each of us has our own answer to the question this continuous effort

[32:26]

It creates its own heat. And sometimes that's very sweet. And sometimes that's pretty hot. But we cook in that heat. It's the process of our practice. It's what we came here to do. And I would be extravagant enough to say it's what we deeply want to do. Maybe more than we realize. We want to experience the intensity of being fully alive. So that's that.

[33:35]

Now we'll do some zaza. You can either just sit right where you are, you can stand up and shake out your legs, and then just sit back down. And we will sit for 25 minutes till 10 to, okay? It's just so you know what you're getting in for. So please, if you would be more comfortable just stretching your legs and then sitting back down, please do. Thank you for listening to this podcast offered by the San Francisco Zen Center. Our Dharma Talks are offered free of charge, and this is made possible by the donations we receive. Your financial support helps us to continue to offer the Dharma. For more information, visit sfcc.org and click Giving.

[34:30]

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