This podcast is offered by the San Francisco Zen Center on the web at www.sfzc.org. Our public programs are made possible by donations from people like you. Good evening. I'm so happy to be sitting here with all of you. Students, guests, retreatants, co-leading a retreat this week. I see some of you here, that's lovely. Tonight I'd like to talk about a koan, case 14 from the Blue Cliff Record, an appropriate response. A monk asked Yunmin, what is the teaching of a whole lifetime?

[01:01]

Yunmen said, an appropriate response. I'll say it again. A monk asked Yunmen, what is the teaching of a whole lifetime? Yunmen said, an appropriate response. So the teaching of a whole lifetime refers to the teachings of Shakyamuni Buddha. And there are a number of translations for the answer, for Yun-men's answer. An appropriate response, an appropriate statement. One teaching confronts each and preaching facing oneness. The latter two, I think, are very close to the original Chinese.

[02:08]

It's probably something like, well, preaching, teaching, that's the same, facing or confronting. And the one is maybe a little ambiguous. Is it one person or oneness? But it's one. So this is, yeah. The Chinese is so condensed, so poetic. So we have to bring a lot of ourselves, a lot of our practice, a lot of our understanding to the teachings in order to understand them. And commentaries and different translations are also a big help. So the Buddha taught for over 40 years and taught a hugely wide range of teachings. And that was in India. And then in China, many centuries later, at the time of this encounter, which was the basis of this koan, there were many translations coming into China, had been for a while, from the Buddha's teachings and also from later teachings that actually, we think, originated in China that were later than the Buddha.

[03:28]

But at the time... they thought that they were all Shakyamuni Buddhist teachings. They were all seen as the Buddhist teachings. So the early teachings, the Mahayana teachings, the Lotus Sutra, the Avatamsashka Sutra, the Chinese at that time were trying to make sense out of this huge body of teachings, which in many ways seem contradictory. They have different styles, different approaches. and they were trying to understand how to make sense of all this. One of the things that one of the schools did was to group them, the Huayin school grouped them, and they did them by different types of teachings, and they made this kind of graduated understanding. So the monk would have been asking from that understanding, that perspective, like looking at this huge body of teachings, asking, what did the Buddha teach? What are the Buddha's teachings?

[04:29]

Or what is Buddhism? Thinking about this, it's a little hard to say. Was the monk just being naive? Like, tell me about Buddhism. Was he a junior monk? Or was he someone maybe close to Yunman's understanding who was challenging him? Like, okay, we have all these teachings, but you say now, what is the Buddhist teaching? Ten words or less. And Yunmin says, an appropriate response, preaching facing oneness. Each one confronts teaching. So one way of understanding this, maybe the first way to understand this, is that the Buddha taught to each person, each group,

[05:30]

according to what they could hear. And that's actually a teaching in the Lotus Sutra that Buddha gave all these different teachings to different people according to how they could hear it. It's like when children start asking, where do I come from? You're probably not going to get out the reproductive diagrams at that point. You might give a talk about the birds and the bees, or you might say, a special place inside of mommy because that's according to what they can understand at the time. So similarly, the Buddha was teaching according to his hearers. And each teaching is valuable. Each teaching is a raft, a way of crossing over to the other shore. All the teachings are for the purpose of awakening.

[06:33]

So we can have graduated teachings and we can say, oh, these are beginning teachings, or these are kind of concrete teachings, or very specific, and then these are more advanced. And we can do that, and there's in one sense nothing wrong with it, but it's very easy to get confused and then think that some teachings are better than others, and some teachings are not as good as others. If the teachings are helpful, they're good teachings. We may resonate with different teachings at different times. But also, you may go back to teachings that you heard years ago and see depths in the teachings that you didn't catch at the time. And this is because the Buddha preached facing oneness. The Buddha had his eye, his heart, on... oneness, on things as it is, on true reality.

[07:39]

And from that profound understanding, he was able to preach to meet each person. So he was always coming from that point of view, even if it sounds like the birds and the bees to you now. He was always coming from that perspective. The Buddha may have used concrete stories and analogies and parables, but the Buddha was not a concrete thinker. So we make a big mistake if we think concretely. It's just pointing. It's pointing back to oneness. The Buddha preached facing oneness, and it's our responsibility to look Pass the words and look to the oneness. So, Suzuki Roshi in Not Always So has, there's a chapter called Letters from Emptiness.

[09:02]

And, oh dear. Although we have no actual written communications from the world of emptiness, we have some hints or suggestions about what is going on in that world. And that is, you might say, enlightenment. When you see plum blossoms or hear the sound of a small stone hitting bamboo, that is a letter from the world of emptiness. So if you receive a letter from someone you love, that letter evokes a whole set of feelings, a whole world for you. They may be telling you about very mundane things in their lives, but it's actually very evocative.

[10:10]

So we open ourselves to hearing, to receiving letters from emptiness. even though the words don't reach it, we still have to try, because we exist in the world of language. We have this very dual nature of living in the relative world, living in duality, this and that, right and wrong, good and bad, judging what's safe and what's not, what we want and what we don't want, and we need this in order to survive. We can't get along without it. It's part of what makes us human. But if we think that's all there is, then we're missing out on so much. We're missing out on the world beyond what we can conceive of. The world that we can conceive of is a necessarily very limited world. And we limit ourselves in

[11:17]

so many ways. What we think we can do, how we think it should be, a lot by what we think. What we think about others, but mostly what we think about ourselves. How we think we should be. What is permitted, what is not. What we should do, what we should not. And until we start to see the world that we create, we can't begin to get free of it. We can't actually get free of it. We're still in this world. It's not going away. And we're not going away. And our personalities, our beings are not going away. But when we see how we create it, we open up the possibility to a whole wider range of being. This is actually how we do it.

[12:17]

We just see what's actually there. First we see the obvious, and then we see the less obvious, and we keep becoming more subtle. And we do that when we sit. And we do that when we let go of our ideas, of how it should be. A lot of us come to practice because we want to be a better person. I know I did. I know I still do. That hasn't gone away either. I no longer think practice will make me a better person. I just think I should be a better person sometimes. And that's certainly not a bad reason to come to practice. It's just one of the many forms of suffering, and basically suffering is what brings us to practice.

[13:22]

one way or the other. So whatever brings us to practice, use that, but don't get caught by it. Don't think that's all there is. When we are children, we try to act like mom and dad and maybe put on I don't know, depending on how old you are, you maybe put on mom's high heels and dad's ties. I don't know what kids do today. Put on their tie-dye t-shirts, I'm not sure. But whatever we consider grown-up to be, we try to do that. We try to look like that. And when we're little, we don't understand that, well, that's not what being grown-up is, actually. And then eventually we get... grown up right whatever that is we realize we still don't know what that is even though we are and we know we are it's a very ordinary thing we just do that and practice is the same way you think it's going to be like something usually like not suffering the suffering that you currently have that you want to get rid of whatever that may be

[14:50]

And that may or may not happen for different periods of time. But the suffering that we really let go of is the suffering of just wanting things to be different. When we're able to be present with what's actually there it's a completely transformative experience. sometimes profound, sometimes very subtle, but it changes us very deeply to just show up for what's present, for what's there. We show up for ourselves, we show up for each other, in large ways, in small ways. It kind of doesn't matter. Practice is this huge, heroic effort on every moment. It's not always fighting the big battle at the push and carrying the flag across.

[15:56]

It's all the little preparations and the details and just doing one thing after another. It's washing the dishes and setting the table or chopping vegetables or cleaning toilets or sitting in front of the computer. And it's how we do it. It's not like practice is somewhere else. It's not like real practice is sitting zazen in the Tassajara zendo. That's real practice. That's great practice. No two ways around it. It's fantastic and it's inspiring and it's encouraging. You really feel something sitting here. Our practice is limited to our butts on the cushion in a special place.

[16:58]

That's just a limited view. Our practice is what we do with our whole lives. It's how we throw ourselves into every moment completely. We throw ourselves into every moment and also let go of our preconceived ideas about how that should be. Not to go along with someone else's ideas, but to open ourselves. To actually listen, actually receive. It's hard to actually be there. Even in conversation with someone we really care about, something we really want to hear, probably many of us have the experience of having to try not to think about what we're going to say next, but to just actually receive.

[18:08]

It's so funny how we're so hungry for presence, and it's so hard to receive it. I'm not really sure why. I think we're afraid. I think we're afraid to let go of the ideas and the stories that prop up our sense of self. But when we practice letting go, then it becomes familiar. It's not so unknown. And we discover it's actually a little easier. It's hard at the beginning. And then it gets easier. I think that's really what I wanted to say.

[19:43]

Does anyone have any questions or comments? difference between what is and what is not there? How do you begin and not head the wrong direction? You said between what is and is not there? Can you say more about that? I feel like you're saying that all we need to do is show up and see what is, but the problem is that we're too busy with what is not there because we feel like it's essential to maintaining our sense of self and we're scared of losing that.

[21:17]

And so how we begin to sort out what's not there from what is and what's not there is so intrinsically attached to how we relate everything about our experience to ourselves. Yes. You start by noticing how you relate everything to yourself. Yeah. the more you notice it, the more you notice it, right? It's like getting a different car and suddenly they're everywhere, right? So it can be really hard in the beginning of practice. It's like, I'm the most self-centered person in the whole world. But that's just because you're starting to see how your mind works, how all of our mind works. Like, oh, okay. So when you pay attention to the habits of mind and the habits of your body, then you can start to meet that skillfully.

[22:28]

You don't have to do that same thing over and over again. It's like, oh, I see that I'm always interrupting my friend or I'm always thinking of the next thing. Oh, I see that. okay, I see I'm worried about what I'm going to say or saying the right thing or that I want to impress or whatever it is. And as you start to see it, you naturally start to want to let go of that because you can see that it's causing suffering. And when we start to get a felt sense for, oh, that's kind of painful. That's kind of painful to do that thing that I do. that I've been trying to not really look at. So when you can stand to sit with yourself, just as it is, then all of that kind of starts to calm down. Just like when we sit and the mind starts to settle, when we don't add extra in our daily lives, the mind starts to settle.

[23:36]

The koan was, what are the whole lifetime's teachings? And Yun-men said variously, an appropriate response, an appropriate statement. And one teaching confronts each, or preaching facing oneness. came across almost linearly like you practice for a lifetime and you get to some place at some point where your responses are appropriate eventually I'll be able to relate to the moment and then there will be some sort of line that I cross from inappropriate response to appropriate response but that's not what I think is going on

[25:13]

And yet, I think that that's the way the practice sometimes seems to unfold, is this constant, if I label it, okay, inappropriate, inappropriate, okay, maybe appropriate, inappropriate, inappropriate, inappropriate, you know, maybe sometime I'll get to the place where it's like 81% of my instructions. a question of practice a few years ago about, I know everything in my head is delusion. It's very obvious. I'm in total pain. I'm always in suffering. So how can I go forward? Because everything I'm doing is obviously a delusion. So the next thing I think of is to be totally deluded. So how do I delude? I like the path you went, the kind of creepiness of it, being able to have acceptance because there's some measure of

[26:20]

the intention of appropriate response, the intention to be there in the moment, even though there might be a better Michael or Linda that you could imagine in that moment. Is that what you were, was that hearing you correctly, or is that just me making up my story to talk? That was a perfectly appropriate response. And each of us has to do that, right? I mean, that's what the wonderful thing is about koans or about any of the teachings is we have to make sense of it for ourself. It's not this thing out there that we eat and assimilate exactly as it is. You know, the Buddha... gave all these teachings, and all these teachers over the centuries have given all these teachings, offered as pointers, pointing us to awaken, letters from emptiness, desperate missives, wake up, wake up.

[27:35]

Not so desperate, but, you know, wake up, wake up. And we can't wake up with someone else's words or someone else's meanings. It has to be ours. And the really tricky part is, it's not the small self's. It's not someone else's, but it's not who I think I am. So, both those sides are true. You know, not this, not that. I both blew it again, you know, missed the boat. And stubbornly sticking to, like Blake said, a fool if he persists and his foolishness will become wise. I don't know any other, like I personally don't know any other way through than to just sit with my muck. But when I do and I stop fighting it, it dissolves.

[28:41]

But I think each person, I know that each person to some extent has to find their own way. Yes? especially affectionate, people especially, some of the person to discuss with abusive language, and so on, and I've said more than that. I'm wondering what is, if somebody is somehow trapped in abusive interaction, what is the appropriate response of the victim?

[29:43]

What does Buddhism have to say about that? The way the texts talk about accepting abuse is as a practice. It's to just accept without judgment. But for a victim to be caught in an abusive situation is to be caught. So if the person is not caught, then they're not a victim. And they can deal with whatever the behavior is in one way or another. But it's completely wrong to be caught in an abusive situation.

[30:46]

It's wrong for the abuser and it's wrong for the abused. And since Buddhism is concerned with suffering, then skillful means should be taken to end the abuse. Should not suffer for the sake of abuse. There are teaching stories about masters who going to say, appeared to abuse their students with the hope of waking them up. It's delicate. We live in a very different culture. So I don't want to get caught in teaching stories that uphold an ideal and compare them to our current cultural understanding of how abuse plays out in the world as very real effects.

[31:55]

And those constructions, those creations exist in both the mind of the abuser and the mind of the abused. And it's a painful web of suffering. And those who are abused should take steps to become free, just as the abused should take steps to free themselves from that relationship. So, what is a skillful way to

[33:27]

Can you give me an example of mind and body telling you different things? Overthinking a situation. versus coming up with scenarios or stories and feeling where your body seems to go right and wrong, which is different from your own mind. I don't know. It's good to have mind and body in good communication with each other.

[34:35]

The body has a felt sense and is very intuitive, but it often needs the mind to help it discern, plan, make judgments, see the skillful way. Like you might be talking to someone and have this visceral reaction of, ugh, and your mind might say, you might not want to express it exactly that way. But it can still, like, oh, I'm having a reaction. So your mind can receive the body's response. And then consider, well, what's my intention? What do I want to do? I want to be kind. And yet I'm having this response, and how am I going to respond? So there can be this relationship. Both are really important. It's not either or. In practice, we talk a lot about staying with the body because the mind is so dominant.

[35:44]

It just tends to take over, so it's kind of to balance things. One thing that you can do that's often very helpful is if you're overthinking something, to shift from what you're thinking about to what the felt experience is of thinking. What's it like to be trying so hard to figure this out? And when you can actually listen to the body, listen to the body's experience, something else can come up that then becomes a dialogue in a sense with the mind because you can hear it. The mind is actually listening to the body and the body is listening to the mind. For more information visit sfcc.org and click giving

[36:53]

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