And with a white sunshade held over him, turning slowly, surveyed each quarter, and then pointing to the ground with one hand, to the heavens with another, he said, I alone am the world honored one. And here he is doing that very thing. Many years later, at the time of his awakening, he touched that very same earth with his hand and declared, this world and I are one. A statement of his primary insight, which has been passed down as a teaching throughout the ages. No separate world, no separate self. This world and I are one. I think we could all take a moment to imagine how these statements by the Buddha are correct assertions. That can be made by each of us as well, and by every living thing. Wasps and great blue whales, sugar beets.

[01:03]

I alone am the world-honored one. And furthermore, I am not alone in that. So are we all. So coming to a realization of both the uniqueness of our personal life, the one that I alone know best, just this person, and our collective life, the one we share with all things, is at the core of Buddhist practice and realization. Suzuki Roshi called these two aspects of our life, big mind and small mind. Not one, not two. Just this person. So studying these two aspects and arriving at some level of comfort with what we could call our dual citizenship as both Buddhas and sentient beings is one way of understanding what is meant by the path of practice. I remember quite well when I first came to Zen Center, sitting in on a class about the path of practice given by one of the senior students at the time, a very good friend by the name of Dan Welch.

[02:06]

And feeling, as I think many of us do, at a complete loss for what he was talking about, I asked what I thought was a fairly safe and straightforward question. Practicing what? I had already, since childhood, practiced a great many things. handwriting and the clarinet, softball. And yet Dan didn't seem to be referring to anything like that as he talked to us about practice. In fact, in response to my question, he and everyone else in the room smiled and laughed, seemingly warm-hearted, so I did not run away. And this time in my own life of practice, warm-hearted laughter seems like a really good answer to practicing what? In fact, a really good answer to a great many things. And yet it's that kind of questioning. What is it? Where are we? Which way do I go? And how should I behave? That is, in fact, necessary to set us on the path of practice, just as it did for the young prince long, long ago, born just like us within the limitations of a single human life.

[03:17]

So I wanted to begin today by reading a short passage from the Pali Canon in which the story of the baby Buddha's birth is narrated, and from there to tell you what he later had to say about the path of practice that he had found and followed to the very source of his own warm-hearted smile. From the Sutta Pitaka, the basket of teachings given by the Buddha. When the Bodhisattva came forth from his mother's womb, the four deities received him. and set him before his mother, saying, Rejoice, O queen! A son of great power has been born to you. And just as a gem placed on Banara's cloth would not smear the cloth, the Bodhisattva came forth clean and unsullied by water or blood. Two sets of water, two jets of water, poured from the sky, one cool and one warm, for bathing the baby and his mother. and a great measureless light surpassing the splendor of the gods appeared in the world, and this 10,000-fold world system shook and quaked and trembled.

[04:26]

When the sage Ashita saw the gods were all happy and gay, waving flags, cheering and dancing wildly, he greeted them and asked about their expressions of great joy, to which the gods replied, At a shocking city in the land of the Mubini, a being to be enlightened, a priceless jewel, is born in the human world for their welfare and delight. He will turn the wheel of the Dharma with the roar of a lion. So shortly after his birth, this precocious baby boy was given the name Siddhartha, meaning the one who will accomplish their purpose. After his awakening, his name was changed to the honorific Shakyamuni Buddha. Buddha meaning awake, Shakya, the name of his tribe, and Muni meaning a sage. So altogether his name came to be the sage of the Shakya tribe who has awakened. Siddhartha's parents, the king and queen, took good care of him, dressed him in fine clothing, taught him useful skills like horseback riding and dancing, and made sure he had lots of other children to play with, one of whom grew up to become his wife, Yasodhara.

[05:39]

and give birth to his own baby boy named Rahula. And so the prince was almost happy, but not quite. The reason he wasn't completely happy was because of his soft and kind heart. Whenever he saw an animal or a person being hurt, he felt sad and wondered how he could help protect them. For many years, he looked for ways to protect living beings from harm, just as the many of you. who care for living beings are doing today, having grown up to be soft and kind-hearted yourselves. Prince Siddhartha, on having reached adulthood, was a very strong and handsome young man, although that wasn't so important. What was important was his soft, kind heart. He had become what we once fondly called a gentleman. So this is a really important point for all of us to remember as we explore the path of practice. that how we look and how smart or strong we are isn't so important.

[06:39]

What's important is how we behave, how we use our strength and intelligence to care for people and for all the other amazing forms of life on this beautiful planet. Such behavior, in turn, depends on how we think and how we feel. For that reason, much of what we call the path of practice is directed toward deepening our understanding of ourselves. by careful observation of those feelings and thoughts that lead to our actions, and by allowing ourselves to be witnessed and questioned by those we count as friends, good Dharma friends. Therefore, the path of practice, as we understand it in the Zen Buddhist tradition, is not undertaken by ourselves alone. We are always walking this path with others, sometimes following, sometimes side by side, sometimes in the lead. When I was thinking about the Buddha's birthday, it occurred to me that there is another Buddha's birthday that happens inside of a person when they entertain for the first time the thought of their own enlightenment, the thought of leaving the old nest of habits and views to seek the path to correct freedom.

[07:51]

There's a Sanskrit term for that initial thought called the bodhicitta. Bodhi is enlightenment or awakening, and chitta is mind, the mind that conceives of awakening. So maybe some of you joined this talk today because of the thought of enlightenment, or maybe you haven't noticed it as yet, sitting there on the back burner of your life. Whatever the word enlightenment means to you, it probably sounds like something you might like. So the next question is, how are you going to get it? The condition of looking for something in Buddhism is called wayseeking. Wayseeking mind, wayseeking heart. a very critical condition for entering a life of practice. Practicing what? In a few minutes, I'm going to share with you a contemporary interpretation of the path of practice based on an old set of drawings from 12th century China called the 10 Oxfordian Pictures. On Monday evenings for the past few weeks, a group of us have been looking at these pictures and considering how they might apply to our own efforts to find the freedom from suffering.

[09:01]

that is promised by the Buddha's own example. The observing pictures have been used for many centuries by followers of the Buddha's teaching to structure a conversation about the path of practice. By following the scenes in this famous series, we can develop a vocabulary of practice and reflect on where we see ourselves in this process. A path of practice that always begins with a question, such as, practicing what? There's an understanding common to Zen Buddhism and reflected in such Zen sayings as this very mind is Buddha, just this is it. Or as in the Heart Sutra, no suffering, no cause, no cessation, no path, no knowledge and no attainment with nothing to attain. And yet we humans persist in our belief that there is something to attain because something seems to be missing. And we really have to find it if we are ever going to be happy. We really do think we've lost something.

[10:04]

And that something we have lost is represented in these pictures by the ox. The someone who is trying to find it is the boy. So the name of this first picture is called Searching for the Ox. All alone. Something missing. Everything shifting and unsteady. At the beginning of the spiritual quest, we invariably bring our confusion, our pain, and our doubt into view. And therefore, the questions we ask need to be real ones, coming from the dissatisfaction we may feel that living an inauthentic life. This aspiration for clarity will allow us to deal with the many layers of prior conditioning as they arise, the old nest of habits and views, to study them and to watch them as they melt away.

[11:05]

Studying the mind of awakening is greatly benefited by allowing the body at times to be silent and still. The very thing that we used to do together in the early morning hours here at Ringgalchen, hopefully we'll be doing again together very soon. The late Zen master John Dido Laurie has written that practice is exhaustive self-examination. But it's in this very study of ourselves that we empower ourselves. In the stillness that emerges, we come to trust ourselves. At this stage of our journey, we are energized by the wish and the commitment to become intimate with everything. As Dogen Zenji also instructed us centuries ago, To study the Buddha way is to study the self, the one we believe ourselves to be, the one whose great big snorting ox has somehow gotten away. The quest may become increasingly embarrassing when we begin to realize that the thing we are searching for is reality itself.

[12:09]

Big mind, that is always right before our very eyes, right beneath our feet, right inside our hearts and minds. A last place, perhaps. we think to look. Aimlessly, endlessly, he parts the grasses, seeking. Waters widen, mountains loom far off, the path goes deeper. At strength's end, weary at heart, with nowhere to begin to search. He hears amid ghostly maples only plaints of late autumn cicadas. And then one bright day, as if by magic, the ox herder with a pounding heart. sees traces of the ox everywhere. What's this? Something flashes startling right under his nose. So this is the stage of both wonder and dismay, knowing with the head, but not with our actual experience.

[13:13]

The ox reality is still being seen as very much outside of ourselves. In terms of Buddhist study, at this stage of practice, we are suitably impressed with the work of the Buddhists and ancestors, and yet they don't yet help us to know the teachings for ourselves. Endeavoring to deepen our understanding, we must engage on our edges. In the tradition of Zen, by sitting in a darkened room, like the young boy in the forest, wondering which traces to follow, whose voice to trust, what to wear, and how to get enough sleep. Because there is no substitution for your own experience of awakening, for a time we use the stories of the awakening of someone else, like Shakyamuni Buddha, as an encouragement to ourselves to make the same effort until we arrive at the same view of ourselves and the world. The world and I are one. And so we continue with our patient, gentle, and wholehearted practice, our way-seeking mind.

[14:17]

using Buddhist texts as expedient means to help free us from the entanglements of our wild and erroneous thinking. For example, I can't find my ox. And yet, if we cling to the texts themselves, to the words and letters of the teaching, we will never find the ox or hear it bellow. It's best to use the teachings like a GPS system that can help lead us deeper and deeper into the dark forest of our own discursive thinking. our own imagination. So here's a verse inspired by picture number three, which is called Seeing the Ox. A yellow warbler trills on and on in the branches. The sun is warm. The breeze calm. Willows on the bank are green. Just this place. There is nowhere at all it can flee. Those majestic horns impossible to portray. So seeing the ox depicts that initiatory experience that is called satori in Japanese, meaning to show.

[15:21]

Sudden insight, overwhelming, unexpected in his face. This experience is also sometimes linked to a word. another word kensho, meaning seeing true nature, and although these two words are semantically similar, it's customary to use the word satori in referring to the enlightenment of the Buddhism ancestors, and the word kensho when referring to an initiatory experience that requires deepening through continuous practice, such as this first glimpse of reality itself. Picture number three is depicting kensho, both a very important and dangerous notion for us to have. In fact, it is the single most dangerous element of the path. Many a good person has fallen off the high mountain from there. You may have noticed over the years that we don't even talk about this word in our branch of Zen.

[16:26]

I don't think I've ever heard a Dharma talk at the San Francisco Zen Center in which Satori was explained or encouraged. In fact, I had to look the word up in the Shambhala Dictionary of Buddhism and Zen just to remind myself what it meant. And so why do you think that might be? You know, why not make a big deal out of the experience of seeing true nature? And how might we turn that experience into a thing that we now have, and being a very good thing, have no intention of letting go? So these are good questions for all of us to ponder, the very questions that lead us right straight on to picture number four, catching the ox. Chaos, nowhere to stand, attachment, aversion, clinging in fear. So who's gotten a hold of who? Does the boy have the ox or has the ox got the boy?

[17:30]

In the stage that follows Kensho, depicted in the next drawing, number five, as hurting the ox, the natural order of reality has reappeared. Dropped away. Too much to handle. Just observing looks okay. So at this point, we are pretty clear how the mind works, how habit patterns affect our lives, and how we are triggered by greed, hate, and delusion. And although clearly discerning the workings of reality, we still remain powerless in the face of our conditioned responses. and therefore stay a safe distance away from the ox. The process of taming our ego entails a persistent turning from theoretical knowledge into vivid and relevant expression. In much the same way, we here on the farm take and make steaming piles of nutrient-rich compost out of table scraps and leftovers.

[18:35]

And even though the blind passions of greed, hate, and delusion have been attenuated through practices of generosity, patience, and ethical conduct, the residue of the long years under their sway cannot be eliminated without long years of faithful practice. As the Zen saying goes, the embryo of the sage is long in being nurtured. Although there is still a need for a tether, meaning discipline and courage, at this stage of practice, It is as if there were none. If the ox herd always leads firmly, the ox will grow serene and good-tempered. Even unfettered by rope or chain, it will naturally follow along. So once those many years have passed, we arrive at the next picture, number six, called Coming Home on the Ox's Back. Strong and steady, marching homeward, now is found what was not lost.

[19:38]

In the course of accumulating this real sense of the Buddhist teaching, we now find comfort and nourishment in continuing on the path of practice. We are no longer afraid of the products of our own imagination. We have gained skills and stability through the repetition of wholesome actions in the world. Based on our daily practices of mindfulness and meditation, our faith has grown as we take refuge in the triple treasure, the Buddha, the Dharma, and the Sangha, and in the raft that will ferry us across the ever-changing ocean of reality. And we have finally given up trying to get something for ourselves, a self that no longer appears as separate from the world through which one travels. Our steady practice has allowed us to recognize who we truly are, to draw back from our amazement with creation itself, and thereby to take a closer look at the luminous pearl of our own imagination, the very mind itself, mistress of our dreams.

[20:48]

Arise, abide and cease. Arise, abide and cease. Like clouds in an empty sky, or like gentle waves on the fathomless sea, For the human mind, relaxed and at peace, that's how reality seems. Soothing. For some of us, soothing might be just good enough, and all we ever want or need. The final three pictures of this set of ten are very much in the spirit of contentment. The translation of nirvana that I very much appreciate is utter contentment. Number seven, the ox is forgotten. The dream is over, but something lingers. Safe, content, he floats. I think the something that lingers in this verse might very well be the sweet taste of liberation. As the Buddha once said, O monks, just as the ocean has one taste, the taste of salt, my teaching has one taste, the taste of liberation.

[21:58]

So therefore, in the spirit of not holding on to anything, we go on to picture number eight, in which the ox and boy are both gone. Through the window, moonlight streaming floods everything. All dissolves. Finally, rid of it all. And indeed, there was a time in the history of these drawings that they ended right there with number eight, nirvana as a variety of extinction. So what might be wrong with that? Well, maybe we know from the earlier rush we had with the dangers of Kensho, the danger that we might actually forget the Buddha's awakened insight that the world and I are one, that your suffering and mine can never be extinguished until everyone is free. And that's a big job. Even the Buddha said, a tiresome job.

[23:01]

And therefore, we will be needing lots of help. And as I said earlier, this practice is not done by ourselves alone. There is no self alone. In fact, at this very moment, as we know, there are literally millions upon millions of people needing food and water and shelter and vaccines and test kits, kind voices and kind faces. You know, lots of them. And so we return to the source, just as the Buddha did at the end of his long journey to freedom. He went home to Kakulavastu, to his parents, wife, and child, and he shared his practice and love with not only them, but with all the other parents, wives, and children of the world. The world and I are one. Returning to the origin. Morning sunlight restores the world, so familiar, ever new. And finally, picture number 10, entering the market with bliss-bearing hands.

[24:11]

Life goes on, moment by moment, his delight shows the way. So there you have it, the journey from home to home. You know, just like Frodo bearing the ring of power, which must by right be tossed into the fiery furnace of the non-dual nature of reality, in which power, rings, persons, and oxen have all instantly melted away. Through one word or seven words or three times five, even if you thoroughly investigate myriad forms, nothing can be depended upon. night advances the moon glows and falls into the ocean the black dragon jewel you have been searching for is everywhere so happy birthday everyone i hope you will enjoy this day of celebration and all those myriad gifts that amazon is bringing your way

[25:19]

I think there's a possibility of asking questions right now, if you'd like. So, Jiryu, who's there somewhere behind the visual field, can you help? I can. Shall we do the closing verse first, or shall we? Yeah, let's do that. Okay. May our intention be. equally extended to every being and play with the truth of what I was doing. Beings are numberless. I vow to save them. Delusions are inexhaustible. I vow to end them. Dharma gates are boundless.

[26:28]

I vow to enter them. Buddha's way is unsurpassable. I vow to be coming. If you'd like to ask a question, please raise your hand. by going to participants, and you'll see an option to raise hand, and then I will bring you onto the microphone. I see Terry. Hi, Terry. Hi. What was the little... There we go. What was the... Little tiny ox in the child's hands in the last picture. It's like a stuffy. Oh, so it's just a little toy. I think so.

[27:30]

This is a little guy. This is Buddha's birthday version, right? So that's mom in the marketplace. Yeah. Oh, okay. So it's a little stuffed. He's got the ox in his arms. Okay. We all do. I loved the very, the child, well, they were childlike drawings, but they were drawings for children, very simple, and that's very lovely. Coming from the Jewish tradition, there's no child... imagery that's powerful. So it's, and of course, Christianity has that incredibly powerful. So it's very nice that, that Buddhism has it too. Thank you so much. Thank you. Do we have another hand?

[28:32]

Anyone else? Please be happy to see you and hear your questions or comments. Or just, let's see, how can we do that? Okay, well, maybe that's it. Oh, here we go. Thank you, Chris. Chris. Yes, thank you very much. I remember you. Welcome back. Thank you. It was beautiful. I hadn't seen those pictures or the concept. And it's such a beautiful presentation. It's so awkward. And it keeps bringing me back to this, well, everything that's in those pictures is here already.

[29:34]

It's almost as if I don't have to do something. or whether I do something or not, it doesn't matter, you know, like, because this is, you started with practice, which is, of course, it was a wonderful, it's just a wonderful mystery about practice. But somehow in the end, through these pictures, you led me to this place where it was, I felt like I didn't have to do anything. That's, it's kind of confusing. Or contradictory, you know. So I just would love to hear some thoughts on that. Yeah, well, I would bet you've already done a lot. No, you probably tried many things from when you were a young man until now to try to find how to be a decent human being, how to live in, you know, kindness and peace and all these words that we value, we want to install in our own children.

[30:42]

And we hope to, you know, manifest in our own lives. So that's the practice is to try to find that there really isn't something to do. You know, that it's really finding the heart coming from your own heart, coming from your own best guess. What do I do now? Because it's always something new. I mean, I have no idea what's going to happen today. You know, what's going to come at me or through me. It's okay. Sorry about that. Like that. See, exactly. Perfect. There we are. Now what do we do? And it's not a problem. It's not a problem. We really are here to live together and to help each other. Like the Dalai Lama said, he said, my religion is kindness. Well, that seems pretty complete. I don't know how you do that, but it's something you can be.

[31:47]

Thank you. I just, that's very clear. And I just am caught up in the feeling of it right now. It's just such a, it's so precious and it's, you know, and here it is, you know, where it always is, but I don't experience it. We forget. We forget. Yeah. We're forgetters. And that's why we do lots of stuff to reminders. That's why I wear these clothes. I like to remind myself all the time what a forgetter I am. Thank you very much. Thank you. Nice to see you again. Nice to see you. Mark. Mark. Hey, Mark. Good morning, Fu. What a treat to spend a day with you. Likewise. Likewise. Welcome to my home. Thank you for your talk. I have... Well, one, I wanted to find out more about if you know who did that particular, those drawings. I wish, you know, I would give anything to find out.

[32:51]

He was a student of Michael Wangers. Michael did a course on the 10, so you're probably 20 years ago now, 20 years. And he asked the class to do their own drawings. And so this one gentleman did, and they're, as you saw, they're incredible. So obviously he was perhaps an artist. Yeah, they're beautiful. And the commentary is great. I've also been studying Joseph Campbell's The Hero's Journey, which I assume you're quite familiar with. And it's interesting to see the similarities of those ox herding pictures with Joseph Campbell thinking that he made this great discovery in the 1940s. Much longer ago, these, and you actually, in your talk, you alluded to, you said something about power and in a way using these ox herding pictures as finding one's true power, which is what the hero's journey is about.

[33:58]

And I wonder if you have any thoughts about this topic of power. Yeah. Well, I think the last thing I said was Frodo and the ring. Oh, that's right. The ring of power. And where did he put it? Not willingly, but he had a little help from his friend Bollum. So the power and the greed for power, the wish for power, the kind of what we call evil that manifests when we try to go for power, for lust, or we're doing something to try to get that thing external to ourselves, whether it's wealth or appreciation from others or possessive love or whatever. It's like that's the thing that has to melt. All of it. Along with a sense of self, a sense of my job, my mission, my anything. Just like, how can I be a felp? It's really kind of a simpleton. Simpletons do better. Being too bright can really get in your way. Oh, tell me more.

[34:58]

Well, there's not much more to tell. We've all heard this since we were kids. Play nice. Share your toys. Thank you very much. And I also love your beautiful background there, though. Thank you. Everyone keeps saying, how come these flowers aren't wilting? Because they're lights. They're not flowers. A little semi-permanent. Thank you. Hope to see you in person. Good. Likewise. Stay well. Stay healthy. Karen Mueller. Good morning. Good morning, Karen. Thank you for that wonderful talk. I often have a kind of a question in here about the ox herding pictures because the gift bestowing hands come at the end.

[35:59]

And I'm wondering about the gift exchange that happens throughout the process. If you could comment. Yeah, absolutely. Good question. You know, I was talking to Gil Fransdale about these years ago, and he said a nice thing. He taught a class on them as well. He said, well, they're really not a sequence. That's not the right way to look at them. They're actually all, can you stack them up all together, and you can put a string through them in there. They're really different perspectives on the search. And we all go through moments of confusion and we're lost and something changes and we lose our footing and then we come back and someone helps us. So, I mean, the journey is not a straight line. These pictures lead one to believe that there's a narrative that goes from the beginning to the end and it's happy ending. But actually, there's no such thing. It's really more of a circle. And we go around and we keep learning as we go around. Maybe a spiral. There's some maturing that happens from the process.

[37:01]

So, yeah, I agree. I don't think it's, you know, this and then this and then this. Do you have anything to add about the kind of gifts that we exchanged prior to that final? Yeah, well, I mean, you know, people help us from when we're that little baby, you know, even though this guy could, you know, stand up when he was born. It's a little unusual child. The rest of us couldn't do that. We had to be cared for for years and years and years. So we've had a lot of help from an awful lot of people. One of the really nice practices we did some years ago was to write thank yous to all the teachers in our lives, starting as far back as we can remember, just to recite their names. And I came up with a wonderful list of people that I thought I'd forgotten about. But they were there, starting Mr. Brown in the third grade. You know, so I think we all have been so helped.

[38:03]

And those are the precious jewels that mark the path. You know, and then at some point you're dropping jewels for others to find. That's the job of our generation now. You know, the elves are leaving Middle-earth. So as we pass on this next group of generations already that are coming behind us, we need to pass whatever we've gotten back for their use. Hopefully we've got some good stuff. that we can offer back and with great love and respect. So it's a never ending. Well, it may end. Mine will end. I'm pretty sure pretty soon. But anyway, you know, for the whole of it, we wish the best. We want it to go on and become more healthy than it is now. Thank you. Yeah. Hi, T. Hi, T. Are you there? Yes, sorry.

[39:04]

Hi, good morning. So I have a question about the last picture going back to the marketplace. So I remember many years ago, I read about this. And then my first thought was, well, if one got enlightened, then what is the point of going back to the marketplace? That was acknowledging me. A few years later, I learned about this engaged Buddhism, and it was a bit of a skill to me, but now I understand it. Engaging with the marketplace, with the same sense being help. The sense to help the needless one. But now living in Green Gouch, I actually have another question. If one pursued the monastic life, and how one go about engaging the marketplace.

[40:08]

And so it has been on my mind for quite a while. Yeah. Well, because you're not doing this by yourself, even the monks are connected to everyone else. You know, we get groceries delivered to the monastery and, you know, and we have visitors come and certainly at Zen Center, we have a whole guest season, many six months of engaging with people who are not being very quiet or sitting quietly or, you know, in there. I remember the first time after being at Tassajara for a couple of practice periods and getting very serious, very serious monk. I was in the kitchen washing dishes, the beginning of guest season, and I heard some giggling out in the coffee tea area. I was absolutely shocked, you know, and I looked out there and there's some guests, you know, dressed in bright colored clothing and they're laughing. And I just, I was, I didn't enjoy it. It took me a while to realize that that was wonderful. I became a bit of a giggler myself. So I feel like there's a way in which we integrate ourselves.

[41:11]

Amastic training is perhaps for a period of your life. Most of us at Zen Center have done that for a while, some years, but we don't really let people stay there. You get to go for a while, and then we fish you out and ask you to be the head cook at Greenwich or some such. and you know that's it yeah you know that's like so you can't get away we won't let you thank you may thank you so much for your talk uh not only the the ox picture but you also mentioned the buddha's birthday um Not a very long time ago, I just know that Buddha lost his mother seven days after his birth. Yes, yes. And interestingly, I didn't get too many.

[42:15]

I just found out that nobody talked about this very important fact. Give me one second. My computer is running out of juice, and it has come unplugged. Somehow. I'll be back. Here I am. Okay. Thank you. Excuse me. You were talking about the Buddha's mother's death. Yes. I just realized that there's not many people talk about that. And then because we're all amazed by how Buddha's resolve, you know, and then he's able to overcome so many hindrance and then... like insane, you know, in many people's standards. It's like, whoa. But nobody talked about this important fact. The reason I ask is my own father lost his mother, you know, when he was very young. So I can feel that with the permanent hope, you know, there, the empty.

[43:18]

And then so such important fact, you know, and yeah, it doesn't matter if you lost a mother, it doesn't matter you are... princess or whatever, right? And then so do you mind elaborating a little bit more about this? Why, you know, there's not much document to talk about this important fact about he lost his mother. And also losing a boy, losing his mother itself is a profound experience for any people. So that actually can be a rather strong motivator for people to continue this path. Yes. Yes. Yes. And, you know, Dogen's mother also died when he was very young. In fact, one of his inspirations for practice was at her funeral when he saw the smoke rising up and had the realization of impermanence and terrible grief. So I think he was seven maybe when, you see, he was more aware of it.

[44:19]

Shakyamuni Buddha's mother died when he was, according to the scriptures, when he was seven days old. So he was raised by her sister, as far as I remember. And she was his wet nurse and very much loved him. And, you know, they also were a tribe. They all lived together. So even when he left home, there were all of these relatives who lived together in the compound, the royal palace. And so there were lots of children and lots of relatives. And he'd grown up with Yasudara, who was the mother of his son. So in some ways, we think about a parent leaving as... around the image of the nuclear family, which we're used to. And then you've got one parent, and maybe it's the mother, maybe it's the father. But I think in more traditional, and I don't know so much because I didn't grow up in a traditional society, but in tribal society, I would think that there's more people there who know the children, who care for the children, who take care of them collectively. So that might have helped to soften it.

[45:21]

But it was really, the awareness of death has sent him off into the woods. And when he saw the four gates, the old person, the sick person, the corpse, and then the mendicant, which his father tried to keep him from seeing because he didn't want him. He was a tender-hearted young boy. So he didn't want him to go off and become a mendicant. He wanted him to be a sword-wielding king and conquer the world. But his heart was so tender that he had no choice. And his wife knew that. And one narration of his home leaving, she's his old friend from childhood. And she says, you're so sad. I don't want you to wait. It's not that nice to have someone so sad. So she encouraged him to go on and to find his peace. And then he came back after he was awakened. And happy. Happy or content.

[46:23]

Let's not say happy. Let's get content. He had become contented. His heart was at peace. So we all lose loved ones. No way out, right? And you know the mustard seed story, too. The woman who'd lost her child is grieving, won't put the baby down, carries a little corpse around on her shoulder. And the Buddha says, well, find me a mustard seed from a house where no one has ever died, and I will bring your baby back to life. No such place. No such place. So we all share grief for lost ones, and others will grieve us. So that's part of the deal in coming to life. Yeah, yeah. One of the facts of life. And so we try to take care of each other, knowing that. Thank you. Okay. Well, that was very nice.

[47:24]

Thank you for asking questions. Thank you for tuning in. And I wish you all a lot more days of safety and health. And hopefully at some point you can all come back to Green Welch. We can meet in person. And I really do wish you all the very best. Thank you again. Thank you. If anyone would like to turn on their camera and unmute themselves to say goodbye here, you're welcome to do so. Thank you all for being here. Thank you so much. Thank you. [...] Thank you so much, Poo. Everybody. Thank you. Thank you. Great appreciation. Thank you. Thank you so much. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you, everyone. Thank you. Bye-bye. Bye-bye. Thank you. Much love.

[48:25]

Much love.

[48:26]

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