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Ngondro Class - Guru Yoga

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We will talk about Guru Yoga practice, the Vajra Mastermind and the Vajra Nature of our mind. Now, the whole series of practice, since we begin the teaching of Mantra. Is there some kind of heat? Turn it off. Turn it off or on? Do you want it on? No, we are on. On. No, it's fine. Whatever you want. The precious human body, the impermanence of life, the cause and effect, the universal law, cause and effect, and the nature of samsara.

[01:00]

Nature of samsara. So, we have touched that part. And to revise oneself on the subject from time to time is very important. Very important. If a person does not revise oneself in the nature of impermanence, the nature of where we are is the nature of samsara. Where we are and what we are. And what we don't learn from our past experience, and how we recreate those situations, how we keep repeating those situations, is called the nature of samsara. Wherever you are born, whether you are born in the human being, or whether you are born in God's realm, or jealous God's realm, or wherever you are born, or any existing experience, there is always that notion of uptightness, that fear, that uncertainty all the time,

[02:02]

a present experience, presence there. That's called the nature of samsara. Wherever you are born, that will be experienced. Realizing that, then realizing means we learn from our past experience. We learn from those experiences that now really it isn't the most wonderful place to live in. It isn't something we should keep repeating over and over again and again. So, there is some kind of opening taking place in yourself, in revising those four thoughts. There is some kind of connection taking place with your sanity. There is some kind of understanding developing in yourself, how to work from the basic sanity level, and how things become messed up, how things turn out to be reverted, not realizing that situation. Those subjects are very, very important. Very, very important to realize. So, when we realize the situation where we are caught at the present moment,

[03:09]

then there is a glimpse of vision, the vision which directs by itself at that time, because that which directs by itself is not separated from our mind. It is our own mind which directs us. So, at that particular level, that vision has been hit, for instance. You can see the vision, a particular vision has been hit, the particular direction has been hit. So, that particular direction started to manifest, and that is the glimpse of awareness, the light of enlightenment, the light of sanity, which is able to liberate the universes, the deception of the mind. So, those all arise from the four thoughts, the way we train, the way we revise, the way we learn from the experience of the four thoughts. They are very important. It's called one of the main things before any practice, to see the present situation, the precious human body, impermanence, cause and effect,

[04:15]

and that situation of samsara. It's like the newspaper, actually, what's happening in the world every day. And so, here is the news of our own history, our history from the very beginning of this lifetime, or our history from this lifetime, what we have done, and how things are going, and how we keep repeating ourselves. So, and that's the whole news of samsara being presented by the four thoughts. Now, after the four thoughts, then is the practice of seeing, seeing that confusion, seeing that fear, which is also arises, which is the fear itself, the deception, the confusion itself is the experience of mind, is the projection of the mind. Once that projection of the confusion has been realized, then there is, that realization has a natural,

[05:19]

natural shining state, and that shining state is called sanity, which liberates the unconscious. And that is the refuge, actually, the inner refuge. When that sanity has been hit, that is called the Buddha nature, that's called the Buddha nature. The whole Buddha nature is the mind, which is transcending the fabrication, which might be transcending the deception, is called the Buddha nature. And that Buddha nature is the ultimate refuge, is your own state. So, what we name it as the Buddha nature means that once that neurosis begins to, the fabrication, the whole neurosis fabrication begins to transcend, then there is a natural touch to the basic sanity, to the total ground, and that is called the Buddha nature, which are the levels of experience in the student mind, how that is experienced. At the beginning, it is almost like, sometimes like a hazy,

[06:21]

it's like a hazy experience, it's like a mist experience, it's like a smoke experience. When you're practicing, you experience like a smoke, you experience like a, like a, what do you call the early morning waters? Mist. Mist, like a mist, like those things. Something is happening, but something is happening at the same time, it's not really there. That kind of experience. At that time you identify the Buddha nature within yourself, in the reality of this life, you see. The things are happening, which usually things are happening, they are very, very serious, very uptight. Now things are happening at the same time, they are like a mist, they are like a smoke, they are like some kind of mirage, something is slight, and at the same time, you find a balance at that time, you find a balance in your whole movement, neither the movements of your mind, the phenomena is obstructed, it's not obstructed,

[07:23]

it's unobstructed. At the same time, the usual fabrication connection is being liberated, you see. That is the ultimate refuge within itself. But, on the level of our talk, we just say that, you visualize the whole refuge team, which holds the lineage, holds the wisdom of the lineage, and actually you hold the lineage, you are one of the lineage holder. You are one of the lineage holder by itself. But we don't come to find ourselves as the lineage holder of the wisdom, because we get caught up into those neuroses, we get caught up into the whole phenomenon arising state, which becomes very wild, very violent, because of not really knowing the basic sanity. Now, now the whole practice, the whole teaching, the whole teaching relates to understand that Buddha mind.

[08:23]

There is no other Buddha than this mind. There is no other negative demon than this mind. There is a negative demon. It's the whole thing is the mind. It's the whole thing is the display of this mind. And how seriously we get caught up into the display of the mind, that's something which creates the experience of samsara. There isn't any samsara inside this mind. There isn't any liberation inside this mind. So the mind itself is called the Kunche Gyatpo, who is the king who creates everything. Kunche Gyatpo. Kunche Gyatpo. It's like the king, the big boss, who creates everything. It's called Semye Gyatpo. Kunche Semye Gyatpo. Kunche Sanye Gyatpo. Kangle Sibanyan. The mind is like the creator of everything. Out of that, the samsara is created and then Nirvana is created. Look at this astonishingly

[09:24]

mind, and I feel respect for this mind. So it's a very astonishing mind. The way it can create things at the same time you would not even believe what it has created. So it's very astonishing, very astonishing the display of the mind. So our whole experience of our life, whether it's the life of an ordinary being, ordinary beings not realize our basic sanity, not realize that true nature of our enlightened state, or an ordinary higher being, let's say as Arhat, or let's say a particular Buddha, on a particular Buddha level, Arhat. Or let's say a Bodhisattva on the mind.

[10:24]

There are ten stages of Bodhisattva in our experience. Then Vajrayana experience, which is like Vajrayana practice, is like intense practice, Vajrayana practice. Intense practice of sanity. Intense creation of sanity. The teacher, the Vajrayana master provides this space, he creates this situation of an intense sanity. The student also has a fearless mind to jump into that space and then really completely work with that intense sanity to liberate the whole universe. This is the path of Vajrayana. So Vajrayana is very profound and at the same time you know that when you do something intense, it is intense. It's not going to be soft. It's not going to be wild. The thing is that in the midst of this intensity there is a gentleness and that is the Bodhisattva mind. Because without the gentleness there is no way to know that realization.

[11:25]

So gentleness and the intensity is at the same time. At the same time. There isn't separation between the gentleness and the intensity. The usual notion of the intensity is very hard, it doesn't allow any gentleness, it doesn't have any love, it doesn't have any communication. Here the intensity has a very powerful gentleness at the same time. As I said, it's astonishing in your mind. The experience of smoke, the experience of how this deception usually becomes such a big deal and now how you can just see that in the movement there is a rest, a scope. Neither the mind is totally being in its unfabricated state, totally being in its spontaneous nature state where you can have where no thoughts are repressed at the same time

[12:26]

within that movement there is a rest, which is the Vajra which is the ultimate state. But to get to that stage we have to make a proper step by step. That stage doesn't come by demand. Okay, I want to stay in my mind. Within the movement there is a rest. But that doesn't just come in a demand. Okay, how can I have that rest? One has to create the situation. So we create the situation without practice. We create the whole situation being presented to you. It's like the Vajra Master gives you to the student a Vajra weapon to cut that, to put that ego, to cut that ego by the Vajra weapon. So that's what the Vajra Master presents to you in his whole technique, his whole situation which he gives to you. But now whether you use it or not it's up to you. And even if you use it or not, it's different. It's like one sword,

[13:27]

a sword being used by a warrior, a sword who has never been a warrior, a sword who is like being used by one very chicken-hearted mind. They have different things when they use it. One who is used like a warrior can completely cut it, completely vanish it. And one who is like the medium can cut it half and half. And one is chicken-hearted, not even a scratch maybe. Or maybe there's a little scratch there. So though it is one sword, but the difference of the swords is the difference of the one who uses it. Like that. So when you completely enter the Vajra level, you completely enter serendipity. Completely work with the serendipity. So it is an intensive serendipity. That is the warrior nature who is completely ready to absorb into the mandala of the Vajra teacher and then work very well with that level.

[14:29]

It's then mind-to-mind transmission. Like Tilopa to Naropa, Marpa, Mila, famous Sambhava to 25 great disciples to Jakinishi Sogyal, to many many great lineage holders. They have all worked with that level until this day. And for the student of the Vajrayana, if they have to find their realization, that's exactly the way where they have to integrate their bodhisattva mind and where they have to work with the Vajrayana the total bodhisattva. The bodhisattva being intense here like in the Mahayana state, the bodhisattva is less. Bodhisattva means the way the mind shines through has a tremendous power at that time. On the Mahayana level, it is less. It's like you talk to the person and you ask, how do you feel? And the person says, Oh, I feel alright. I feel not well. Then you say, OK, you can do something like that.

[15:30]

But on the Vajrayana level, it's like a person is not willing to take medicine and you just open the mouth and put the medicine inside. Whether you like it or not, now just drink it, you know. And once you have the willingness, even you don't feel to take the medicine, the student should have the willingness to open the mouth and the teacher pulling the medicine inside. That's exactly the world of Vajrayana, how it has to be. And that seems difficult. That's what I'm saying. That's difficult. The teacher is pulling, but you are like that. Then it makes the teacher hesitate. Does he want to drink it or not? But, you know, the strength of that. So one should be willing. Because if you keep closing your mouth and opening your mouth in that way, you miss, you extend the time. So you just have to open your mouth and you just pour it inside.

[16:31]

That's called the mingling of the mind. That's where the mind of the teacher, Vajrayana master and the student meets together. So that's exactly how it is. And that kind of experience, that kind of vision does not come immediately. It's something that comes by understanding. It comes by understanding. At the same time, it needs some level of gut. It needs some level of gut and understanding. Of course, without understanding, no one will open their mouth. And at the same time, it needs some gut. It's like that. You know that medicine is extremely sour, but you know it's good for you. But the sourness doesn't allow you to open your mouth completely, wide open. So at this level, you have the gut to open your mouth completely wide. So that's the importance of that. The gut and understanding, both has to be integrated. So that's really the skillful way of the approach in Vajrayana practice.

[17:32]

The gut and understanding. The whole understanding is based with our practice in the ngondro. The whole ngondro provides that understanding. The whole ngondro provides the realization experience. And the gut is naturally that bravery, that strength, naturally. It's the birth of the bodhisattva, at a particular level. Until this time, one has been deceiving oneself all the time. Now is really the time to open up now or never to be opened up. So therefore, there's a tremendous compassion, tremendous friendliness you have to yourself, that I better do it. If I don't do it, then it could never be healed. And never the time will come to be liberated. So there's a gentleness in the opening up. And there's a tremendous gentleness as far as the Vajrayana is concerned, because he has experienced this before. You know, before you have experienced, he has experienced. So he just tells you, he just advises you, you open up, so whatever.

[18:33]

So in the whole process, there is such a bodhisattva mind. And the whole bodhisattva mind is that mind-to-mind transmission. There is no, without bodhisattva, the whole, when we talk about mind-to-mind transmission, it's a bodhisattva mind-to-mind transmission. It's not an idea. It's not a philosophy. It's not an idea. It's not a smartness. It's not something, you know, some kind of theory they put it to. It's the mind-to-mind transmission. Completely, mingling, completely, completely mingling together in experience. So the whole process of the Gondra practice, first we begin with the four thoughts, then we go to the refuge, then we go to the bodhisattva mind practice. You know, there are many, I've given many talks on bodhisattva on many different levels, sometimes the six paramitas, sometimes working with the ruses, working with the vipassana, different levels,

[19:34]

the infinite teaching which comes from the bodhisattva level. And then on the, we work on the medalla now today, and then bodhisattva practice. Now particularly today is the guru yoga practice. The guru yoga practice. Guru yoga practice is exactly what we just, just now I mentioned about the opening of the mouth and the teacher putting the medicine inside. It needs that situation. So in the guru yoga practice, we create the Vajra student and the Vajra master, you know, both create the, both create the situation to completely, completely work fearlessly in order to, in order to experience the fearless nature. Which means you need the fearless mind to cut the deception. So it's not going to be easy, it's not going to be easy cutting the deception. But at the same time, you know, you are willing to work with your bodhisattva mind to cut that

[20:36]

deception. So here the whole, you know, the whole technique here we use the practice of the skillful practice. How how we kind of at the same time learn that our whole attachment to our life, the whole way, the whole thing which really put us into this pit hole of samsara is basically our attachment as some kind of neurotic attachment to our self. And the way this neurotic attachment to our self begins with, to which we feel this neurotic attachment is to our body. So body become like the main, one of the main thing which we get, which we which is the, our body becomes like one of the main main inspiration for the attachment for this, to preserve this to preserve this ego. But body is, there is nothing wrong with the body. It's perfectly fine. But the

[21:37]

thing is there is a notion there is a notion of maintaining that. There is a notion which maintains the ego, which actually has nothing to do with the body. Which actually has nothing to do with your being. With your basic self. But there is some kind of deception that we confirm the deception on the on the body. We confirm, that's the craziness of the mind. We confirm the deception by holding to the body that I need to protect my body. So therefore there is a very strong clinging. But actually you don't have to in order to maintain the body. There is no need to have that clinging. There is no need to have the notion of survival because you are there. You're just there. So that notion of the deception which is the samsara that is the samsara. There is no other samsara than that. That samsara experience that I have to

[22:39]

maintain myself that I that I which is never anywhere that I if you look inside that very strong I that very thick, very hard into ourself which we feel pain is represent our whole world. It represents the mandala of this, I'm sorry, world. Our chaos, our neurosis our pain, our pleasure everything being really represented by the I. So I feel this chaos. I go through this tremendous thing being holded by grip. It's a strong grip which holds this whole thing. Very strong grip. That I need to understand this. I need to I like that and I dislike this. So tremendous fear. The whole thing is a fear. A grip which really holds very tightly and creates an abundance of pain and abundance of

[23:40]

uptightness and paranoid in our state of life. Everything we've done. That whole thing comes with a notion of survival which is a fear. It's simply a notion of survival. And when you really look into that you can't find who really wants the notion of survival. It's not really there. And that notion of survival which is trying to maintain itself, which is trying to survive all the time, that is called ego. There is no other ego than that. That projection is called ego. That projection, you have a grip on that, tight grip on that projection. And that is that is the base, the root of the sapsara. Where we grip, from that grip it invites the whole thing whatever manifests from this astonishing mind which is in its own nature being freed, but we hold every phenomenon which arises with grip, we have a strong grip we hold to it. So therefore we become very

[24:40]

claustrophobic. We don't see the mind being open, we don't see the mind being in its Buddha nature. We don't see the mind being liberated. What we see is very tight. What we see is very uptight. What we see is very limited. What we see is very painful, very fear all the time. And all the time there is this miserable experience of, you know, myself and I have to survive and now who is going to fight me, who is going to, you know, all the time holding that miserable mind, miserable projection. So now one has to cut that. That is the root of the limitation. That is the root of the deception. Because the survival that one is really trying to hold is not there. And that holding it becomes so tight, so powerful that it expresses its vibration. It has a vibration. And that vibration becomes the portrait of our psychological world. Our world becomes the portrait of that paranoid.

[25:41]

You can see that. Let's not say that this world projection is the portrait of that craziness. Just see that. Sometimes a person is very paranoid and you see a person who has no bad feeling to you, who really loves you, or who just has a good feeling, and you think that person doesn't like me. Because you are simply paranoid at that time. So you project, you know, you throw the whole neurosis, whole shit on the other person. And you think that that's how that person is like. He doesn't like me. And then if that person slightly has a movement which doesn't confirm, which doesn't suit your projection at that time, then you clearly confirm. Yes, he doesn't like me because his movement is like that. That's the only time. So like that, one paranoia creates another paranoia. It becomes stronger and stronger and stronger, and that's called the world of samsara. So not to happen like

[26:42]

that, here we pray to the whole village. You know, we work with the village. There is nothing kind of different. Praying means knowing oneself, opening that mind of perception, cutting that mind of perception. There is the blessing of all enlightenment. The blessing of enlightenment is naturally there inside your heart. You see, naturally there. But here, even it's there, but without the lama, without the teaching, you are never able to discover that. You are never able to even to think that there has been such a sanity to yourself. And even though now you see that, oh, there it is. It's not so new to you. You identify with the village. You identify with the sanity. You identify yourself, you know, not being that what the deception experience has been trying to hold on oneself, thinking that I'm the little human being, and me, that particular whatever your name is, holding a tremendous aggression and tremendous

[27:42]

tight grip and attachment to that name, whatever you have. And you find yourself sometimes concerning that. You find yourself something not really that state which has always been something very difficult. Something wonderful is there at the same time, and something astonishing is there, you know. And so you begin to see, you begin to see who you really are and what you are. And so that is something that we bring the whole lineage, particularly on the Vajrayana level, the surrendering of the whole universes and the working of the lineage. And here, seeing the teacher, it says when you see the teacher moment into the thing with, you know, the whole human perception, human perception is a perception. Everything is perception. Mind is perception. Everything is mind, the way the mind wants. And you really have a tendency, OK, every being is a human being. Every being. So that even the Buddha and Bodhisattva

[28:45]

coming to human form, they are also human. Because why they look so serious? But in order to relate to the mind, there has to be some kind of similarities. As I said, when the Bodhisattva met that Brahmin lady and how he ate crazily, you know, that he also become like crazy and he also took that bone and then, you know, and as she was taking the bone, that's called schizophrenia. And so Bodhisattvas are everywhere. Bodhisattvas are even, you know, among all levels. They do not necessarily come into some kind of teacher form or some kind of saint form or some kind of, you know, a particular version of the world of spirituality. They come in all different kinds. There is no limit to that. So, knowing that is important. So we project it. We project also like that. One of my teachers, who is called

[29:46]

Jatagiriji, very, very direct, extremely direct teacher. It's hard to stand with him. He is too direct. Sometimes too hard to, you know. Sometimes, that's how Vajra Masters are very demanding into sanity center. Okay, you sit. I want to stand with you. And you say, alright. And suddenly, tomorrow morning, take your things, go and stay 15 days in retreat up into the mountains. And you say, I have to go and do something. I need to do some shopping. Which enlightened being has ever said to Guruji, did Milarepa ever said when he went for doing practice, he need to go for shopping? Sorry, you better go somewhere else. This is not the place. Like that. Very direct. Usually he doesn't give much teaching also. He is really very strong.

[30:47]

So here is one of my teachers. And Rinpoche said, if you see the teacher as a human being, you get the blessing according to them. Because you hold that whole notion conceptually. If you see it as from the senator level, from the Buddha level, then you get the blessing. Particularly on the Vajra world. Even the students. Why you do not hold yourself as a particular that grip hold of the student. One sees from a Vajra level. So for that, as I said, we have to really, we have a lot of works to be done. Lots of works to be done. We have a number of years to go that how to deepen our understanding to ourselves. And when we understand and deepen the understanding to ourselves, then we understand the world of Vajra. We understand the world of Vajra. So, but I am not saying that you are not understanding. But there is something very special. It transcends

[31:49]

that ordinary notion of the phenomena. But at the same time, it works with an ordinary notion. Without working with an ordinary notion, there is no practice. The practice talks our language, our human language. So we would say that the practice talks our human language. It works with our state of mind. And it introduces the state of mind that how we can transcend our neurosis. And how we can see through it and cut it. And right there, the presence of the Buddha nature is there. So in that, that's how it's very important to identify the Guru Yoga practice. So here, particularly, the Guru Yoga practice will relate to Pramasambhava who is the embodiment who is the embodiment of all the Buddhas and in the Parinirvana Sutra, predictions by Shakyamuni Buddha. Nevertheless, Pramasambhava is there, but the main thing is your own Lama who

[32:51]

gives the instruction. And you lose your connection to your Lama, and there is no Buddhas. Where are the Buddhas? There is no realization. So it's very important the Vajrayana, the Vajra Lama, the Vajra Essence. Your nature is the Vajra Lama. You are the Buddha nature in yourself. There is no other Buddha than outside. So same thing, when you relate to the here, particularly on the head, you study, you practice. Where do you relate? You have to relate to the Vajra Lama. And when you don't relate to the Vajra Lama, you try to bring some kind of lineage up and upside somewhere, it doesn't relate because the whole thing is beneath it. Your Vajra, the creation of your Vajra Lama has created that particular world to you where it is your basic sanity, which is yourself. So in that way there is a deep understanding of the Vajra Lama. An understanding of the Vajra Lama. So that's exactly how the Vajra Lama practice is done.

[33:52]

So then when you do the practice you see Guru Rinpoche but in essence it's your own Lama. There is no difference. Come on Sambhava and learn the Lama, there is no difference. In yourself also different, you see. What you are doing at that particular level is both creating the situation, how that deception can be dissolved. So here you visualize yourself with Dakini and Shudra for instance in the Guru Yoga practice and the teacher manifests in the form of Guru Rinpoche. And then you do Guru Yoga practice with Om, Ah, Hung as I explained. Om is the body, the essence of the body of all the Buddhas and Ah is the essence of all the speech and Hung is the essence of all the Buddha's mind. Hung holds the five wisdom nature, Hung holds the like cleansing the word Hung has a tremendous power. It's like cleansing

[34:52]

and wisdom and balancing. It has a tremendous effect into that into those mantras. And when you do it repeat it like thousands of times or hundreds of times then you really feel there's something different than ordinary language. It's not really just like ordinary language. There is something which is something different and you feel it right there. It is not something like ordinary language. There is something different into those because it has been blessed. Those forms and figures and those words has been blessed by those sanity. It is like a self-born nature obviously. Like the letter Ah. Ah is called the supreme letter. Ah is called the mother of all the Buddhas because Ah is the most spontaneous sound. Ah is in the highest doctrine practice

[35:52]

when we recite the word Ah. Unfabricated. It directly introduces the unfabricated state of the mind. Ah. Ah. So there are very, very important points into those words. So you Om. Ah. Hum. Umma. Hum. Like Vajra. Vajra means indestructible. What is indestructible? It's your essence. It's your sanity which can shine through all the time without being caught anywhere. Vajra. Guru is the lama. Lama means the lama word. Lama means heaviness. Responsibility. Responsibility in what sense? Being friendly to yourself. You don't deceive yourself which is your lama essence. And on the relative lama means who takes the responsibility of all the beings. It's not easy to become a lama. It's very hard to become a lama. You have no idea how it is hard to become a lama. It's very difficult.

[36:54]

You have to protect the beings of those who are alive and you have to liberate the mind of those who are already dead. That's the power of lama. And it's not easy. And as I said, when someone trusts you, you have to you have to prefer them. So that's called lama in Tibetan. I don't know how it is interpreted in Tibetan, but actually that's called lama. Heaviness. Heavy responsibility. Heaviness. Lama. Guru. Which is the lama. Teacher. Padma is Padmasambhava is the Padma family. She was born in the lotus Padma family, so Padma. It also symbolizes the lotus is like the purity of the mind. The purity of her basic sanity is like the lotus. The lotus is born in the mud but there is not a single mud.

[37:54]

It is beautiful perfume all the time. Everybody looks at it and creates a happiness. We come and see people give a lotus. It's like a symbol of love, symbol of purity. It's like sanity. So that's what lotus is. Padma. Padma means lotus. Siddhi. Siddhi means granting. What granting? That essence. That perfume. That lotus-like nature of the mind which is like which is though it is said granting but actually there isn't any dualistic way of granting because it is already self-accomplished wisdom. The wisdom is not creation of your meditation. Some people think wisdom is created by meditation. Wisdom is not the creation of meditation. Wisdom is not an idea which you try to hold and you try to expand that idea. No. Wisdom is self-accomplished wisdom.

[38:56]

So what in practice does you, through your practice, then you see your unfabricated state and that unfabricated state is a precision and a clarity which there is total absence of the deception. That is called wisdom. And that is what our whole practice will lead to. Your practice has to be done until you transcend the deception. Then self-born lotus-like mind naturally stay in wisdom. Sure. But that is not creation. It is not the creation of a lama. It is not the creation of Buddha Shakyamuni. He didn't invented that. Nobody invented that. It is there. It is there. But we don't see that because we completely, you know, cover ourselves, we surrender ourselves into this deception. So it is very hard. We keep the notion of survival and the notion of survival creates the fear

[39:58]

and the fear creates the neurosis and the neurosis projects out, expresses, reflects to the world and it feeds back to ourself and we keep on reflecting and feeding to ourself and that is called the practice of self. Actually it is quite simple. Two words we can say. Reflecting and feeding. Now where is the liberation? That is the thing. There is the window. So one, we could just liberate. That we don't know how to liberate. So we reflect and feed. And for that we have to read. Thousands of texts has to be read. The hundreds of lectures have to be read. Thousands of texts have to be read. Thousands of bodhisattvas have to be read. Again and again and again. Just to know that it is so simple nature and so complicated also. So in Guru Yoga practice first of all it is very important to have that devotion. The devotion doesn't come by understanding.

[40:58]

Once you understand, the devotion naturally grows. The greatest service for the lama is called in all the Vajrayoga practice the greatest service for the lama is your practice. You do a practice and you get enlightened. That's the greatest service for the teacher. There isn't any greater way to pay back the kindness of the teacher. There is no comparison in the whole universe a person can ever pay back. The only way to pay back is when you get enlightened. That's the greatest service for the teacher. Otherwise there isn't. Buddha Shakyamuni the way he went to pay back the kindness of his mother, he went to the Tushita room to give teaching to all the devas. It's very hard to pay back the kindness even of the mother and the teaching. It's even harder. The only way one can is through the practice. So therefore it's something one needs to by the time your experience your practice becomes genuine your understanding becomes clear and your deception

[42:00]

becomes less and less you're open and you will become more and more. Your mind becomes clear and clear. At that time there is a celebration between you and your teacher. That's a great celebration. It's a celebration where all the good and bad suffers are also there. Now you don't do your practice well and then you project your negative to the world, you project negative to the teaching, negative to the teacher then what is happening more and more so much of practice practice impartial pure vision even with the total pure vision it's hard, it cannot happen so impartial pure vision always maintain good heart what we say, good will of a human being is actually trying to say that you have a pure vision. Good will as a human being, have a good will have a good heart

[43:02]

do something good in the society do what you can do something good not to harm other people that's again a part of the practice of bodhisattva mind though it's not totally bodhisattva mind because one doesn't see how it can transcend because the notion of survival is there you try to be good because you like to see the world in a good way so there's still the fear of the notion of survival is there so your goodness has some kind of good it is like bitter good it is sweet and bitter sweet you want to do something good but bitter there is some kind of because you like to see that you like to be happy so your sense of fear is there I need in order to make myself good in order to make the world good so therefore I'm doing this but you can't say let the world be good so be it no one has that notion so therefore the bodhisattva bodhisattva is teaching

[44:02]

the world so so our attachment to make it that clinging the clinging to our the clinging has to be less the clinging has to be loosened up the clinging has to be limited even in a meditation first you send a notion of meditation because it is important for beginners if you do not send a notion of meditation there is no way to begin a meditation you say it the example creates the situation gives the inspiration for you to say then you send a notion I'm going to do meditation once you start doing meditation then if you start clinging to that meditation you would not see your mind you would not see your wisdom you also have to liberate that notion of clinging so even it will work that clinging will come into even your spiritual practice

[45:02]

and nobody said that it would not come it will come but you have to work with that skillfully that you have to open up you need the gut out of that of course sometimes you can just be you can just sit down you can just if your mind is turning into too much shadow too much emotion you better have this thing you better have that thing just look at it it is almost like completely living without any fabrication and then it will liberate liberate but what we usually do we constantly put it in our head I have to experience it I have to experience it this is bad, I don't want this is very important and then this keeps on feeding itself keeps on feeding itself but the only way we can do is through the practice through that lineage through that lineage blessing

[46:05]

through that understanding and devotion to our practice then we are able to let the mind be as it is so so the practice will make your mind mellow make your mind more lighter, more transparent and then you start to see yourself clearly there is a precision to that you see, you know you know yourself better there is a bodhicitta mind arising at that time you have to sometime sometime don't, you know, sometimes particularly if you are caught like tremendous wild emotions and thoughts if you start relating to those emotions and thoughts it will become vivid and you have to kind of open up at that time you have to welcome it

[47:05]

and now that's when you try to welcome that it's very looks very dangerous now the whole fear the deception will say how can you welcome this this is the thing which is putting you so much pain and now if you want to welcome it that's not the right thing you better not welcome it and then it creates a wall there so you don't know what to do if you welcome it you will never welcome it so you don't know what will happen if you welcome it you will never welcome it so you don't know what the outcome will be, you never trust that and if you don't welcome it you know how things are you know this is the same old experience but the same old experience what we usually try to do is to patch up the same old experience we try, you know, if it's

[48:09]

anger, we try to forget it we try to shift our consciousness and shift our whole thought, our whole pattern of thinking and think something nice okay, you can have that for a while then again it will happen again that will come back again that will come back again they feel the whole phenomenon looking like extremely violent particularly if you have a thought, someone who don't like you someone who hates you the moment you think about that thought it's very threatening to you and sometimes it stays for days and days because what you're doing is you are attached to yourself to yourself means the notion of survival which is actually not needed at all there's no space it doesn't allow them to breathe it doesn't allow that whole situation to be liberated so then you become completely imprisoned and then tortured by that situation it's called the torturing of the subconscious the viciousness of the subconscious

[49:11]

if you you want to free, but you don't know how to free, you don't know how to you want to become free from that state you don't know how to be free when you don't want to suffer, but you keep holding that, the very causes of the suffering and that's called the ignorance that's called the confusion there's no ignorance or confusion in that so when you practice deepness deepness then those threatening thoughts before you have like for instance, let's say someone who hates you very much that thought becomes transparent before they were not transparent they were very real now they become transparent and you also see yourself transparent so now the threatening

[50:15]

becomes less now you're seeing the situation clearly ah, now your self is transparent, what else is there then the precision of the wisdom is beginning to shine at that level and then a sense of that aggression that neurosis started to dissolve that aggression you start to resist and fight back and completely destroy the other side completely, don't even want to think about it there seems to be loosening up and there's a welcoming state gentleness it's a natural, it's not that ok, come, come, it doesn't mean like that it's a natural sense of welcoming and there's an experience of joy at that time because of knowing the nature, because of being the way you are because the fear is now dissolving then, of course, when the fear

[51:17]

dissolves, then there is joy there is sanity there is your basic ground, there is a basic state then, you know your whole life experience is not only one particular situation but your whole life you're really getting to see that that it's not terrible it's not terrible and from that moment even someone is very unfriendly to you, something very bad but you have a sense of you know something special you cannot describe by word, you know, something that how you can you know, you see that it's not the end of the world, that's one thing you don't see that you don't see the end of the world which we see usually the end of the world if things doesn't switch to our situation, block I have nothing to do with that you don't have that, you should

[52:18]

because the whole thing is whole thing is like transmitted by nature whole thing is transmitted and then you begin in your whole life that you become more welcoming and now that more welcoming means your basic sanity that bodhisattva mind is shining without hesitation it doesn't have hesitation sanity just shines because the precision of the wisdom is as it is as it is of the wisdom as it is of the wisdom is interaction at that time so so when that happens, then the whole display of the deceptions are liberated, whether in you or the person, so on a guru yoga level, the Vajra Master create the situation

[53:23]

sometimes the Vajra Master let the student dance into his space and then suddenly he shows you could be any situation any situation it could be in a very humorous state or it could be in any particular state suddenly like Tilopa when Tilopa show the nature of the mind to Naropa when they suddenly as they were going, he took his shoes and hit him on his forehead and suddenly he couldn't get up now really in ordinary sensibility because they can see the whole mind how it is functioning at that particular level one is rubbing them exactly in ordinary in ordinary level that sound, you know very crazy

[54:25]

he took his shoes and hit him on the forehead what amendment to take a teacher to court so that much that much that much connection, that much creation the students and the students teachers that's how it is practiced that's truly how it is practiced in the Vajra and we can see that that kind of practice is very rare today because the student is opening up and it's also hard for the teacher to completely put everything inside freely I'm telling the truth I'm telling the truth so

[55:26]

to do your your practice but you must be open and you should never give your practice you should do your practice the most important thing in your life is your practice nothing other than your practice we put all our time and energy into the deception therefore we are caught into the deception so it's important to put ourselves if we love ourselves, if we care about ourselves, then it's important to liberate ourselves from the deception so then in the Gauri Yoga practice you use the you see the teacher into embodiment of all of the Buddhas, his essence he is giving you the transmission he introduces the nature of their mind he is giving you the transmission so then you do the Gauri Yoga practice Om Maham Vajra Veda Practice again tremendous light radiates

[56:28]

at that moment, tremendous light radiates Padmasambhava in front of the sky, tremendous light radiates to you, you are the Dakini you should see that, Dakini is the feminine aspect of your life now this is a skillful name on Vajra on Vajrayana level you all know that you have all seen many Thangkas, many Deities on Vajrayana level and all level of teaching from the Hinayanic level to Vajrayana it is skillful but particularly on Vajrayana the skillfulness has a very, the skillfulness becomes very powerful, the skillfulness becomes something extra precision so as I said, our whole grip of that deception is that fear of holding to ourselves, something we hold to ourselves

[57:30]

has nothing to do with our body but body is like when we look at it and say this is me something which will confirm that fear, something which will confirm that so here skillfully one transforms oneself into Vajrayogini or into the Ishisorya so that the whole whole notion of survival which clings itself is liberated that's the whole notion there so you transform yourself into Vajrayogini which is the essence the nature of your own self is Vajrayogini so you transform yourself into Vajrayogini and seeing the teacher not from that our whole information as that particular person but from the lineage of that visible and now your notion

[58:33]

of the whole tight grip of the deception falls apart and then you become Vajrayogini now the both at that level is not something dualistic it's not something that one is absolutely different and here you are different because now again that whole notion is a tight grip of one's own creation of the phenomenal world so it is non-dual, non-dual transmission it is there of course the teacher is there at the same time it's like a flow, it's a natural flow from the body, speech and mind of the teacher, tremendous light radiates into your body, speech and mind and then liberates and purifies all the deceptions and all defilements

[59:34]

make the mind shine and see as it is which is the mandala of the old buddhas there is no other mandala of the old buddhas, there is no clarity so then at that time it's the omaha of Vajrayogini omaha of Vajrayogini omaha of Vajrayogini so we do this about our we do this we do this like 500 times 500 times it's just like 10 minutes 500 times 10 minutes it doesn't take long we think number is 500 I'm going to spend the whole day doing that it's just like 5 minutes 6 minutes, 10 minutes it's not long so you can do that I do it every day 1000 times 1000 when I was doing my practice I used to when I was in retreat I used to do 30,000 a day

[60:38]

omaha of Vajrayogini it's tremendous powerful powerful practice for a guru yoga practice it's the most powerful emitting of the two minds because constantly emitting, the constantly emitting the emitting of the two minds taking place and then the whole deception the emitting of the two minds doesn't mean that two entities meet together it's like a skipping that tremendous blessing of the teacher and you see yourself and the whole deception and at that time whether you call the teacher mind or whether you call yourself at that time there is a total communication understanding, liberation of deception then you do the omaha about 500 times and at the end now you take the initiation it's very important the vast initiation first the white the letter om from the guru

[61:40]

from the guru's forehead the letter om radiates to the white light and dissolves into your forehead you are watching it dissolves into yourself purifies all the veins all the chakras all the impurities of the body which is purification of the states activity of the compassion which is called the nimanakaya state the activity of the deceptionless mind the activity of the mind being free from the deception it's called the nimanakaya the bodhisattva mind that's nimanakaya and that being received the whole deception of the body observation the body impurities being purified so with that white letter om then ah the red letter ah is the speech spontaneous letter as I said ah is red in color and shoots like a light shooting through your heart

[62:42]

to your speech center to your speech center and purifies all the deception and impurities of the speech at that time the whole chakras of the speech center opens up and when the speech center chakras opens up you become visionary you become actually visionary visionary not in the sense that you start getting hallucinating visionary in the sense that deceptionless visionary you know it's not like Hollywood creation of movies where they show all this you know or fighting or horrors or romantic or whatever you know all kinds of trips it's a tripless vision a tripless vision that at the same time skillfully that how you can work with yourself all the skillfulness started to manifest at that time as a speech then the hung which is the heart the mind of all

[63:42]

the buddhas you know mind of all the Tathagatas you know shooting with the blue letter hung it dissolves into your heart that you are the Dakini at that time your whole presence is the Dakini and then it dissolves into yourself and the whole experience of the fear and the notion of survival the whole thing after that you can visualize the five lights five color lights emanating from the from the Thammasambhava mind and then dissolving into yourself that purify all the habit patterns all the limitations all the patterns that the creation of habits that which reinforce the ego which reinforces the fear all those habits which put things into category this category that category when this goes that that limitation that category being liberated the whole habit pattern which is the wisdom light

[64:47]

now after that here in the short gondola it doesn't explain that but you can visualize that and after that now you dissolve the teacher completely dissolve into yourself Thammasambhava before even in your visualization time it was into a light form a transparent light light body you are Dakini also you are also transparent you are not something gross body what we usually have the notion you are also transparent so to a transparent light nature you are Dakini transparent when the teacher transparent nature dissolve into you and at that time once the five color light dissolve into you now you become inseparable you even do not have any attachment at that time to whatever thoughts any thoughts arises you just let it arise do not fabricate do not entertain do not try to make anything at that time

[65:49]

you will have the experience of the Buddha mind which can send those deception it is a very powerful skill the mind teaches mind dissolve into yourself you don't even hold any particular form or any particular thought just let it be and you remain in that state it is called the ultimate illustration where one is able to experience the total center of all the Buddha's mind your own Buddha mind start to open and then now how we again put ourselves into deception by again immediately those thoughts arises we kind of have a grip hold of those thoughts and then we put things into category you don't have to put things into category you don't have to even have a devotion to your teacher devotion to your meditation at that level once it is dissolved it is just the way it is you don't create anything, no fabrication at that level you have a negative thought let it be, don't be scared don't be threatened by it it is called

[66:49]

resting at that time you are resting resting in the movement resting the thoughts into movement or you are just into the state you are unshakable which is the Vajra mind indestructible nature no matter what phenomenon arises a terrible phenomenon arises you are not being threatened by it a wonderful experience arises at that time something like you see the whole world there is no attachment to this or you have a very tremendous devotion arises at that time you are opening up your mind you feel tremendous devotion to your teacher no attachment just being in yourself that is the ultimate essence that you can practice then again something will happen there will be emotional causing then again you will start getting busy into your world at that time then you dedicate

[67:51]

the whole practice you dedicate everything you understand and dedicate it like all the Buddhas all the Buddhas like Bodhisattva, Manjushree all the Bodhisattvas they made a Bodhisattva person dedicated likewise I dedicate it you too so that is how you do the Guru Yoga practice so constantly that is very important the generation of delight from the Prana Sambhava is for the spiritual mind dissolving into yourself and now at night time when you go to sleep you should not go to sleep usually we go to sleep in the midst of those phenomena we go into the midst of our habit that is the thing we have to cut those things and wake up awakening state of the mind it is called awakening we go to sleep you go to sleep with your day habit whatever you did maybe you have a talk with your friend or went to a cafe

[68:51]

so you go and then you go keep recycling so now you go to sleep with luminosity with light into your wakefulness you sleep actually there is a way of sleeping of course it is hard to do everybody likes to sleep all different styles and different posture but basic way in sitting sleeping style if you want to balance you should sleep your right hand your right hand underneath underneath your thing and your leg stretched and your hand this one at the top like this sleeping is called lion style sleeping lion's way of sleeping like that and then and then at that time in your heart in the midst of the rainbows in the midst of the rainbow like nature a transcendent sanity of the buddhas like here

[69:53]

into the appearance of Anasambhava Anasambhava is inseparable from the teacher being inseparable in your mind then you sleep in that deceptive mind whatever the thought arises you don't cling to them you are very gentle there is no clinging to those things then you sleep and in that way you will recognize your dream at night you will see how the deceptions are there and usually when you have a dream you are completely into it again we are recycling that cycle again we are recycling that state you know mind itself the whole mind so at that time you see those dreams and then you recognize those dreams and you feel the deception that's how you sleep and morning when you wake up you wake up that Anasambhava from your heart goes through your central chamber and sits above your head

[70:53]

so it's the protection the sanity which shines all the time wherever you go there is a sense of sense of being and there is a blessing and sense of being and knowing yourself and your whole fear the whole deception becomes weaker that's how now if one goes a little bit more deeper sometimes one even does practice this whole body is a very sacred body in the Vajrayana practice this whole our own body is the body of the Buddha Mandala this is the way to go so when you take the food and you offer the essence you offer the essence to this very body which is the mandalas of the all beings so sometimes one even visualize Anasambhava in your throat the first food goes offers to the Kali Sambhava which represents the essential of the state

[71:54]

and if you don't find that easy you can just take you can just take not in the sense of aggression not in the sense of the neurosis that you try to maintain the survival just as offering in that way then so there is a day and night circle of practice like that Vajrayana practice so particularly dream state is very important when you go to sleep is one of the most important sleeping time practice is very powerful when you go to sleep you have a you hold Anasambhava in your heart and then it's not like gripping a tight gripping it's very relaxed and then you go to sleep inseparable your mind and your teacher's mind inseparable and whatever the thoughts arises you're not being caught by those tremendous moments of the thoughts you liberate the thoughts you're not caught by those neurosis you liberate the sense

[72:55]

of survival that fear and then naturally the wisdom will shine and there is a powerful experience and then in the early morning when you wake up you feel fresh and clear and then your first thing when you wake up like that through the road the channel, open central channel the teacher in that way then that is how Guru Yoga practice is done this is for Guru Yoga practice so that is which is involved in the mudra practice now this kind of thing is nothing related to sitting practice usually in sitting we just do it but our sitting will be very deep and very powerful with the integration of Guru Yoga practice so I guess

[74:08]

so so that's the Guru Yoga practice so we have gone through the Vajrasattva practice to Guru Yoga practice and so now the next time we will all do the mudra practice together and so now if you have any questions you're welcome to ask in saying the Guru Yoga mantra after several hundred after hundred times is it important in the beginning stages to always enunciate the words as close as possible because I find that I can easily fall into almost like a humming if the words go so quickly that they don't sound like the words anymore, is that appropriate or should I always be trying to say the words as close to the sound of the words as possible

[75:10]

like slowly or fast as fast as I can but sometimes if I go really fast it starts to be more like a sound like a vibration that's fine as long as you are clear inside clear inside and as long as you are making that yeah of course it will make like a sound but it has to be clear if it's clear even if it's like a sound it is fine yes particularly when you're doing a lot it will just be like a sound but then it will be clear that's the thing it has to be clear Rinpoche when we are starting the mantra do we immediately start visualizing the lights from Padmasambhava or does that come at the end you can visualize all the time sometimes you can visualize hundreds of thousands of lights of Padmasambhava emanating and dissolving

[76:12]

into you that's even more powerful hundreds of thousands and if you can usually just visualize Padmasambhava there tremendous light radiating, dissolving into you and at that time in the whole situation you surrender your whole preconception you surrender your whole prejudice which is the you know we like things to be this way and that way so at that time you're trusting the whole direction the whole direction seems to be working in ourself the whole process of the teacher's mind the whole thing is completely working so you don't have to kind of like have the observation checking out now it's happening right or wrong it's just the fear at that time you see so you have to completely open and trust the situation I was thinking specifically of when I was visualizing the light from the forehead to my forehead and the light to near to here does that begin already

[77:14]

when we're saying the mantra? Not particularly, but you can always visualize the light radiating, that's fine yes, but at the end then it's particularly dissolving it's not usually but you can always visualize like Padmasambhava in the midst of the rainbow and light is always illuminating because light symbolizes illumination of the darkness of the experience I guess because what I'm doing at first I visualized really get a good visualization of Padmasambhava and then I visualize the white light and concentrate on that for a while while I'm saying the mantra and then I do the next slide that is your version you don't have to do that as I said, the whole thing is a self-process it's like the initiation taking place at that time it's like you don't have to care the white light stays for this moment now you're gone that's the whole interpretation of the ego but that comes so you have to, as I said to open up how you can open your mouth that's the whole point

[78:15]

so if I just start that way and then allow whatever comes yeah, yeah, yeah yes, right Kaya waka citta siddhi kaya waka citta siddhi is like taking the grant the ultimate grant and the relative grant ultimate grant through guru yoga practice the ultimate grant is the enlightenment the liberation of the mind we see the five wisdom nature in ourselves the five passion turning into wisdom the nature of five passion is wisdom when that when that neurosis of those particular energies liberates then it's the five wisdom and relative grant is all kinds of things beauty musical

[79:16]

whatever when have that aspiration on a relative side that's called the relative grant that also happens relative grant and ultimate grant but ultimate grant is more important you have to direct your whole practice to the ultimate meeting of the two minds if you start thinking oh I want to do this practice so that I can be famous I can look wonderful I could be charming your whole ego is interpreted that's not true you absolutely have to let that go then this true self nature of the wisdom will shine but it is the two grants usually kaya waka citta siddhi whom is immediately please join me now those two accomplishments the accomplishment of the wisdom and the accomplishment of the relative grants so would that be an appropriate time

[80:18]

if there is someone you especially want to remember to pray for of course that's every practice whole mind practice before you begin your practice you dedicate the practice for all beings that's the difference between the Theravadin practice and the Mahayana practice Theravadin practice is just for yourself you just want to get enlightened you're sick and tired of this old mess you just want to get out but Mahayana you think of others also in Mahayana there are three kinds of attitude Bodhisattva one is called the one is called the shepherd attitude one is called the shepherd attitude shepherd like Bodhisattva mind

[81:18]

one is like the king style Bodhisattva mind and one is called the I don't know exactly that word but basically what it means one attitude is you want to get enlightened and you want everyone to be free from the deception at the same time you and the others want to be free from the deception for that you're practicing that's the rising Bodhisattva mind that is the lowest lowest Bodhisattva mind and the king style Bodhisattva mind is the second attitude of Bodhisattva mind the king thinks first I have to be powerful then I can help my subject that's the king style Bodhisattva mind the highest Bodhisattva mind is the shepherd attitude where the shepherd takes care of the sheep before anything he protects the sheep before so that you generate your complete dedication to all the things and you are the last

[82:19]

you care for others that's the shepherd like Bodhisattva mind wish you have wish you have Rinpoche, is there anything specifically happening as far as like we talked about last with the as far as the new empowerments are coming is there a relationship there? Oh yes, yes Om Ah Hu Tsa Om purifies the Tsa, the wind Ah purifies the wind and Hung purifies the Thigla, the mind, the essence Thigla is a natural process of the practice even in meditation it happens those are not explained in meditation but it's a natural natural version So what is happening

[83:21]

in this practice? In this practice now this is called skillfulness here, you see one cell as Vajra energy and the tissue as Pramasana it's a male and female energy it's a skillfulness so here, but at the same time it's not a dualistic it's not a dualistic version of that clinging it up, that neurosis you see, the whole neurosis is liberated, there is no deception into that basic sanity it is free at the same time a person able to find at the Guru Yoga practice the, one is one is creating the situation where we can receive the blessing, thereby opening up so therefore we visualize into the Dakini, because male and female energy you know, the male and female energy is the most skillfulness you see, so therefore one cell as Vajra, it's like

[84:23]

if one man says if one man says to to to one woman is stronger than 100 women telling to one woman and one man telling to one woman is stronger if if 100 men telling to one man and one woman telling to one man and one woman telling to one man is stronger so it's skillfulness so same thing in the practice of Vajra, skillfulness one cell is Vajra and a muscle of another one so that's how the meeting of the two minds, working, even bringing the skill so in the whole practice skillfulness and Dakini nature is emptiness without mother without mother there is no human being

[85:25]

the whole Buddhas the whole Buddhas born out of the emptiness emptiness again we picture empty nothing, it didn't mean nothing it means fullness we cannot even describe about that it was to send the object of that emptiness to send the object there is something alive precision which that precision clarity is the goodness so the feminine energy is the emptiness which gives the birth out of the space the whole galaxies the whole universe is given birth out of the mother's womb the whole people are given birth out of the space of all the Buddhas are born which is the feminine emptiness, Dakini nature and that clarity is the main nature which is the human nature, so the union the space is emptiness and emptiness and emptiness is space the space is clarity, clarity is space you cannot separate the birth and the emptiness it's oneness

[86:26]

like the reflection of the moon in the water you see the moon, you go to catch the moon it is not there yet it shines so it's emptiness, it's form, form is emptiness emptiness takes the form of form and they are inseparable so male energy and female energy for that basic sense it's completely one it's not separate so therefore in Vajrayana the woman holds the nature of Dakini and man is Daka very profound you don't see that criticizing and we criticize and we look into that very ordinary world and we can go far in all kinds of unpleasurable yes ultimately so one has to develop the understanding of men as Daka I don't think

[87:30]

in the practice of Vajrayana one completely sees that purifying the tsar completely purifies those seeing the imagined sending the deception one sees the birth of this birth of that energy so so I'm very happy this time to be able to talk to you a little longer and what I've explained is there will be a lot of light which you will unfold yourself

[88:30]

into the practice in which later I will also have more and more unfolding into this practice you should not think that this is the whole it is complete but there is whole lot to be unfolded into the practice and we are translating this world book next year so we hope that it will be ready and in the meantime we should all do our practice it is very important to understand that the practice is the most important thing in our life the first priority of course it is practice so please do your practice carefully you don't have to do it just do it and then you will understand if you just eat it when you eat your breakfast, eat your lunch eat your dinner without even thinking you maintain your body

[89:31]

just like do it and it will shine it will shine you start looking for everyday everyday I have to have a great experience it would not be like that sometimes all kinds of different karma manifest sometimes we have very strong disturbance because we are not completely balanced we are not completely confident we have not been liberated those experiences are overwhelming and then you kind of drift away and then again the notion of escape comes and where we escape we escape into the we escape into the deception not cutting through those situations so therefore just do it, just do it everyday and that itself will shine that's why I really like everybody to do a good practice and then you will appreciate yourself you will know yourself I guess you understand

[90:37]

thank you

[90:40]

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