This podcast is offered by the San Francisco Zen Center on the web at www.sfzz.org. Our public programs are made possible by donations from people like you. Good morning. I think a couple of days ago, I think it was a couple of days ago, I mentioned the light shining in the window of the Abbott's cabin. Well, it did it again today. I guess such is the nature of a revolving earth. But today, I thought, that's it.

[01:04]

I went and got my camera and took a photograph of it. And as I took the photograph, I thought, I'm going to send this to Yoni. Yoni is someone who has done practice periods here. She's part of the Slovenian sangha. And she's also an extraordinary artist. And I was thinking, Not so much as a formulated thought, more like a feeling. You only will get this. You only will get it. Somebody who gets us. Even what is it to get ourselves?

[02:11]

some part of yourself that you open to, hopefully with appreciation, at least acceptance, or maybe even forgiveness. But that connectedness, you only will get it. Just before I took such outrageous behavior, I was reading a piece from Phukhansa Zengi that says, and if the least like or dislike arises, the mind is lost in confusion.

[03:15]

violate that notion, that admonition, if the least like or dislike. I liked the light. I associated with the sensibility. And I thought of yawning. who I also like. You know, in the world of Zen, in the world of Mahayana, in the workings of every one of us, what's this balance between renunciation and appreciation? There's a way in which if we make our practice stark, this, that it has a kind of severity to it, that it loses the nurturance.

[04:55]

existence then it I would say something in us rebels if Zazen is proposed as this ruthless denial we're more likely to ruminate, we're more likely to fantasize. If Zazen's an intrigue, if we're watching the movements, I suspect pretty much every one of us at this point in Sashin is noticing

[06:01]

rising thoughts. Maybe some of them whimsical, maybe some of them a replay of old stories. That weigh heavy on our hearts. Or puzzle us. the activity of renunciation in those circumstances. In the circumstances of being human and having a conditioned subjective existence. The basic principle

[07:09]

Prajnaparamita, the Heart Sutra, is neither real nor unreal. And what arises isn't an absolute, a permanent entity, but it's an interplay. It's the kaya, It's a world system that's created in a particular moment where a shaft of light casting a shadow on the wall sets in motion a world system, creates a person called Yoni. in a country called Slovenia creates an aesthetic, a sense of kinship.

[08:20]

Yesterday I was talking about softening and opening and contracting. As awareness becomes more prevailing in our consciousness, we can start to see the rise and fall of the ideas of what comes to mind and heart. And we also start to see and feel the kind of state of existence, the disposition, having that experience. Maybe it sounds exotic to put it that way, but to see the movement of mind, there is a presence.

[09:35]

Just to be able to even note there's a presence. And it seems to me presence is supported by a disposition of appreciation, a disposition of, sometimes I think of it as almost like savoring, not in a way where you're trying to own it or trying to squeeze out the juice of it, but more opening to the experience letting it register how else will we get ourselves how else will we hear what that particular thought process that's going on has to say how else

[10:52]

will we feel the emotion of it? And when we get it, the kaya is illuminated. I hope that makes sense. It is awareness starts to persist in our consciousness. We can start to see and feel the thoughts. We can feel the way in which subjectively they're real.

[11:58]

In that moment, yoni was real. And then in a persisting awareness, that kaya opens up to whatever's next. disposition that allows, that calls forth that state of consciousness. The disposition that allows our self to be what we are.

[13:06]

conditioned existence that's constantly expressing itself. We are immersed in the subjectivity of being. I would say to you that when we allow that to sink in. Being alive is kind of amazing. Maybe it's the greatest show there is, although sometimes as it loops through it's said many times, it can feel perplexing, limiting.

[14:22]

And as we attend as we allow, as we connect, as we get it, as we let it register, it becomes just itself. And the very experiencing of it has a quality of renunciation. This is what is. It's itself. It's not just the stories I have about it. It's not just the intrigues of my like or dislike. It's itself.

[15:42]

the least like or dislike arises. Mind is lost in confusion. And yet, most minds arise with some flavor of like or dislike, some flavor of pleasant or unpleasant, some flavor attachment or version. In the Heart Sutra it says, Avalokiteshvara, when practicing deeply prajnaparamita, when watching with compassion, with openness, with spaciousness, the interplay between neither real nor unreal.

[16:55]

This is the live dynamic of creating existence. It's not permanent. It's not an absolute. And yet, vibrant with life and and as we start to establish awareness we can start to see very particularly how that plays out within our own version of conditioned existence start to get ourselves look at just what just popped up look at the feeling that comes with it as we get ourselves

[18:22]

like we make more sense to ourselves of who we are and how we are our patterns of thoughts and feelings and behaviors we get ourselves and we get the human condition oh this is what we're all up So Dogen Zenji, as I mentioned, he wrote for Kanzo Zenji. And then, depending on which scholar you want to champion, either seven years later or 13 years later, he wrote a little more. And so in that revised version, he added this section right after

[19:24]

the least like or dislike arises he added this this is this is shuhaka okamura's translation of what he added we should know that the ends of transmigration of samsara is caused by the discrimination of one moment the path of delusion in the dusty world is also caused by ceaseless evaluation. If you want to thoroughly transcend even enlightenment, you should simply understand how to settle down right now. I think it's a little bit scary. We should know that the eons of transmigration in samsara is caused by the discrimination of one moment.

[20:31]

Makes me think of agitated mind. when we're feeling vulnerable and the solution to that is to be adamant it's like this and we can infuse it with emotion and conviction it's like this it's always like this and I'm a hundred percent correct heck with Prajnaparamita. Yeah, and who needs Avalokitesvara? Yeah. It's intriguing how in those animated aggressive moments are declarations

[21:50]

have such impact. Maybe it transmigrates for eons. Certainly, if we direct that at another human being, or maybe even your dog or your cat, usually has a strong impact. When we direct it internally, it has a strong impact. Can we invite Avalokiteshvara to hold our hand in such moments?

[22:50]

Can we invite, is that so? Can we get curious about the notion that in practicing with his own version of Fukansa Zengi, Dogen Zenji was moved to add this? He's writing in the context of his own experience as a dedicated practitioner, and he's also writing in the context of his own learning. It's pretty obvious from Fukunza Zengi where he copied

[23:59]

almost word-for-word sections from something that was written a hundred years earlier, of Cheng Lu's, who copied, in his version of Fukanzu Zengi, some pieces from Zhuri Yi, the finder of Tendai Buddhism. It was a hundred years before him. This marvelous process where century after century we ask ourselves, how do we practice? How do we practice this activity we call awareness? What kind of diligence does it ask of us

[25:04]

disposition what are helpful things to note what are helpful strategies and what are helpful things to note that don't help how do we have compassion and patience when we contract and formulate an adamant truth permanent and absolute. Protecting ourselves from our uncertainty and vulnerability. How do we rediscover the nurturance of opening and engaging? Not from a place of preference, but from a place of appreciation.

[26:07]

How do we realize that is a momentous thing to do? It goes on for eons. How do we remind ourselves The returning phrase is more often the thoughtful phrase displaying that we get it, we get the person. We acknowledge the nobility of their being than the rebuke. How do we do that?

[27:14]

How do we do it for ourselves? How do we do it for others? And then after that fierce first sentence, Dugan Zenji said, the path of delusion in the dusty world is also caused by ceaseless evaluation. Ceaseless evaluation. Sometimes in our diligence, our deep sincerity, our way-seeking mind is setting up its latest calibrations on good and bad.

[28:18]

And more often than not, we're calibrating other. And then as we settle into subjective being, we calibrate this one. And we forget that all calibrations are relative. Good is good according to some evaluative What makes for a good blue jay or a bad blue jay?

[29:32]

What makes for a good person or a bad person? working of mind, evaluating. Is wayseeking mind inevitably evaluating? Is the discernment process that leads to wisdom the same discernment process that leads to fixed ideas and judgments.

[30:43]

One of the abiding principles of Zen practices the evaluation is dynamic, that it's not based upon fixed measurements. I think Einstein said something like, it's insanity to think you can resolve a problem with the same thinking that caused it. How do we turn? And actually, in many aspects, the turning, the shifting, the shifting from fixed judgments to a fluid relationship is quite simple.

[31:47]

like appreciating what's happening on its own terms. As Dogen's angel says, when the world comes forth and confirms the self, that's awakening. When the self goes forth and tells the world what it is, that's delusion. that receptivity, that letting it register, that getting it. Oh. When a moment is experienced, when we open to it, when it registers,

[32:53]

I heard that truck, and I thought, oh, is that Kogan? It was supposed to come yesterday, I think. Mind wants to know. Mind wants to construct a knowable, predictable reality. And then it wants to not just know, but also be able to calibrate the value, the importance, the safety, of its own constructs.

[34:00]

That's how we negotiate being alive. Can we attend to the phenomena of the process of thinking? constructing of assessing of judging can we attend to it when it's just pops up like the sign of a truck can we attend to it when it's a deeply familiar thought pattern with lots of psychological significance for our being. Can both of those be attended to in a way that we get, that we don't get caught up and hooked, but we see it and experience it?

[35:29]

And something, when we do that, something in it comes alive in a different way. Dogen continues, the path of delusion in the dusty world is also caused by ceaseless evaluation. If you want to thoroughly transcend even enlightenment, You should simply understand how to settle down right here. You should simply understand how to settle down right here. if we look at the human condition, we can see what a formidable coin he's offering us.

[36:52]

That somehow we're challenged to settle the unsettledness of a lifetime. We're challenged to undo our notion of settling as an imposition on the unsettled. We're challenged to take up The great paradox that allow the unsettled to be exactly what it is, is the path of settling. When we open to experiencing it, when we open to noticing it, acknowledging it, making contact and experiencing it,

[38:10]

Just as it is. Just as it says in the Satipatthana. This is the challenge. This is the con for us. This is the compassion of Avalokiteshvara. This is the illumination of Manjushri. This is the great activity of being, of Samantabhadra. And this is the simple workings inside our being that open up to all being.

[39:20]

Because as we experience it, we invite consciousness beyond the definitions, the constructs that hold it in permanent being. Permanent, separate being. It opens us up. We forget ourselves. So this challenge. the allure of unsettledness that can accompany the movements of our consciousness, can we still, in the midst of them, can we turn towards it and experience it?

[40:29]

Can we allow it to be itself without getting hooked by it? Can we stay tender-hearted, appreciative, and still not get lost in like and dislike? I'd like to end with a piece of a poem, because I've neglected to do that. Someone said to me something like, yeah, and then you're not rambling around in those poems as much as you used to.

[41:49]

This is by Czeslaw Mološ, a Czechoslovakian poet who actually ended up living in Berkeley. A day so happy. Fog lifted early. I worked in the garden. Hummingbirds were stopping over honeysuckle flowers. There was no thing on earth I wanted to possess. I knew no one worth my envying him. Whatever evil I'd suffered, I forgot. To think that once I was the same man did not embarrass me. In my body, I felt no pain. And straightening up, I saw the blue sea and the sails. What is it to straighten up?

[43:10]

In the midst of being, straighten up and let the world be forgiven. Let all your past injustices caused by you and caused by others Ah, be forgiven. And to just take in what's in front of you. The blue sky. The sound of the birds. The shadows of the sun coming through the trees. amazing green algae that the hot water coming out of the old bath ice is spawning in the creek.

[44:23]

This is... of awakening. This is the gifts of awareness. But it's a full package deal. You also get your old stuff. Those old hurts that you try to surprise, guess what? When you open up, they come forth. Can you get them in a way you never got them before? Can you get them in a way that undoes rather than redoes, rather than reinforcing old patterns, it opens up possibilities.

[45:44]

This is the intrigue of awareness. This is what draws Dogen to write Fukanza Zengi. Ten years later, rewrite it. This is what draws Zhuri to write his version. And Chong Lu, to write his version, modifying Zhir Yis, and Dogen Xindyi to write his version, modifying Cheng Lu. And each of us write our own version, live our own version of awareness. This is our challenge. how lovely, in the middle of it, we can pause, straighten up and take in what's happening in the moment.

[47:02]

May it always be so. Thank you for listening to this podcast offered by the San Francisco Zen Center. Our Dharma Talks are offered free of charge and this is made possible by the donations we receive. Your financial support helps us to continue to offer the Dharma. For more information, visit sfzc.org and click Giving.

[47:34]

@Transcribed_UNK
@Text_v005
@Score_98.1