This podcast is offered by the San Francisco Zen Center on the web at www.sfcc.org. Our public programs are made possible by donations from people like you. Good morning. Good morning. My name is Susan O'Connell, and I lived... past tense, at the San Francisco Zen Center for about 28 years, eight of which were here at Green Gulch. And as Timo reminded me, five of which were in room five in Cloud Hall. So it's lovely to be back. And thank you very much for the invitation to speak. And let's see how it goes. So I don't know about you, but my emails and texts and Facebook feed have been full of recommendations on how to live with the challenges that are currently manifesting, in particular with the new composition of our government.

[01:16]

In that feed, there's a statement that I came across. I wanted to read. As I finally allow the unimaginable and let myself go to bed with a cup of warm milk, I ask myself, what can I do tomorrow to help ease whatever pain I encounter, mine, my friends, strangers? And what understandings and practices offered in our lineage can encourage healing, allow for grieving, include those who want to celebrate, and help initiate conversations about what is important. And what is important? The planet, our children, our human ability to love and to understand that we are not separate. This was written on November 8th, 2016 by me.

[02:22]

Reading these thoughts from eight years ago highlights one of the many insights that's come up for me this week. We have been here before. And while it's not exactly the same, we have previously encountered drastic changes, and not just in politics, but in weather, in health, like COVID. Who imagined COVID, right? just like the Internet itself and now AI. Yet, even though we've been here before, I find myself feeling like I need to consider new pathways for stabilizing and being able to encourage in myself and others skillful responses to what is. Beginning with complete acceptance, of what is, not wasting energy on wishing it were otherwise, because it can't be otherwise.

[03:36]

This, of course, does not mean acquiescence. It means establishing stillness and balance to allow for skillful responses to arise. It does mean doing our best to be non-reactive. You may have noticed this, but one of the best things to do when feeling personally rattled or discouraged or even outraged is to see how we can attend to the needs of others. Shifting the attention from myself and my personal concerns, frees me from the strong pull of depression and despair. So in that light, I'm very fortunate that I was asked to give this talk. Over the past few weeks, rather than fussing too much and stewing and worrying about me, I was able to focus on what I may be able to do or say to help you.

[04:54]

May it be so. I began in earnest to think about this talk two weeks ago, which was a fool's errand. How could I ever know what would be the most helpful thing to offer that far ahead at a time as dynamic as this? I reached out to a Dharma sister, and we joked that maybe by November 10th, we would still not know the outcome of the election, so my talk could be about not knowing. That'd be good, right? I mean, we have a lot of teachings about not knowing. Or, this was her idea, I could prepare two talks, right? One about fear and one about joy, right? And then she said, and then I should bring them here, both of them, not tell you which one was in which hand and say, which one do you want me to give? Right? So that was the kind of environment about thinking about what I might say.

[06:04]

So as I told you, I've lived at the San Francisco San Center for 28 years, and I recently moved to our senior community called Enso Village, which is filled with like-hearted elders, many of whom are teachers, have been teachers here at Green Gulch and in the city. When the election results were clear, my body felt like it had been hit by a Mack truck. And I had a sleepless night, much like the one I had in 2016. My first response that night was dread. For others, it was anger or despair. However, The next day, the beauty of living in community was apparent. The meditation hall was open all day for quiet contemplation, for soothing silence.

[07:14]

And then there were two spontaneous gatherings of residents in which people and staff, residents and staff, spoke from their hearts. And with that, my heart started calming down. And I had a deep, well, maybe this deep appreciation is what calmed me down, a deep appreciation for feeling the friendship and support of Sangha. You've all come here today possibly because you intuit that the power and spaciousness of Sangha can hold and uphold your entire range of experience. I highly recommend that you continue to seek out other hands to hold and spaces where you can express the full range of your responses. So congratulations on getting here.

[08:15]

Because this is a Dharma talk and not a political action committee, I want to look at some teachings. that have arisen for me in the past few days. And they're related to having a view of the world that will help me steer away from debilitating fear and hate and anger. I'm not very good with fear and hate and anger. Not very skilled. Another Dharma sister, I don't know if she's here today, but Sonia Gardschwarz forwarded a statement in that flurry of people sending out things to help us, help our hearts. And she had received this from a Rabbi Erwin Keller a few days before the election.

[09:23]

So here are some experts, excerpts. Probably he's an expert too, but excerpts. He said, I don't know what's going to happen next week, but I want us to remember that the time that we are in is much bigger than the election. Our role is bigger than getting particular individuals into office. There is a field. I don't know what to call it. a spiritual field, a cultural field, a metaphysical field that needs to be restored and protected. It is formed of our greatest communitarian values, being kind and holding fast. We are here to be guardians of the field, guardians of a wholeness

[10:26]

that has become torn and tattered. So let us be guardians of the field. Let us infuse it with values of kindness and peace and the ever rarer respect. Let us not succumb to feeling alone and insignificant because we are not alone and we are not insignificant. We are here with each other. So thank you, Rabbi Keller. Guardians of the field. Every morning here and in other meditation situations, we put on our robes after meditation and we recite a short chant.

[11:27]

Part of which says, great robe of liberation, field far beyond form and emptiness. This is the same field that I think the rabbi is talking about. It's the vast field of connection that is not hindered. This field is also related to the vastness, to the vastness aspect of the bodhisattva vows. In these vows, which we're going to recite later, we talk about numberless beings to be liberated, inexhaustible delusions to be ended, countless Dharma gates to be entered, and the vow to be an embodiment of awakening.

[12:32]

Vast. You may have heard or heard of Michelle Obama saying, when they go low, we go high. I'm suggesting that when we humans are tempted to shrink our views to the personal and painful, it can be helpful to consider the limitless context of that pain. So do we go low or do we go wide? Your practice has probably shown you that we're not actually in control of our circumstances. You may have noticed. There are an infinite number of causes and conditions from beginningless time that affect each activity, each thought.

[13:36]

In meditation, you may notice that we don't even really control or generate our own thoughts. Have you ever followed a thought to its kind of genesis, to its birth? And seeing that the impetus for the content of the thought was the sound of a bird call or the sniffling of the person next to you. They're not even our thoughts. In this vast field of existence, the fabric of our world can get torn. and faded. We are not in control. But we can clearly observe. We can clearly observe the tears in the fabric.

[14:44]

And as I was writing this, it occurred to me for the very first time that the word tears and tears is the same word. So if you find yourself weeping, Emma weeps a lot. Remember, we don't need to create this field of kindness, of respectful consideration. We nearly need to mend the torn fabric. Field doesn't disappear. in times of disappointment. It merely

[15:32]

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