This podcast is offered by the San Francisco Zen Center on the web at www.sfzc.org. Our public programs are made possible by donations from people like you. Good morning. So, in the first class, which happened long, long ago, and you've probably completely forgotten, I talked about Bendawa as a way to illustrate the three essential points of Dogen's Way, which were a rising way-seeking mind, that practice and realization are intertwined. They're simultaneous. As you engage the moment and are present for the moment, the way unfolds. The way is manifest right there and then.

[01:01]

And ji ji yu zamai, to study the self. If you remember, he culminates that first paragraph where essentially he's saying, this is what's being transmitted by all the Buddhas and ancestors. And this, the expression of this ji ji yu zamai. the self, the very workings of this conditioned existence become the illustration of the path, the manifestation of liberation. Okay, and then we went into Shashin. And then Shashin culminated with strange proposition.

[02:04]

First part, things are much worse than you think. Here you are thinking, this is pretty bad. And then you get this news. No, it's much worse than that. And then paradoxically, practice with it. What does practice ask of you? Surely if things are much worse, you should complain a lot louder. But instead this proposition, what is it to practice with this? Yes, I will. So what I'd like to start with this morning is going back through how I got to there briefly. and then give you an opportunity to maybe something I said in Shashin puzzled you or that you would want to ask about.

[03:16]

So the point of entry I came from was ordinary mind. Josh's question, what is the way? Ordinary mind. And if you think about it, not so far from JGU's online. Practice with the self. Practice with what's coming up. Nonsense. Wonderful answer. Ordinary mind is a way. This kind of initiation of stop looking for what's not here. Stop putting your energy into changing this into what should be happening and meet it as it is. At this point, that we never exhaust. The request of practices, keep coming back to that.

[04:22]

Keep reminding yourself, no matter how far you roam in your thoughts, come back to just this. And then just this has within it the expression of renunciation. What gives the urgency? What propels us into fantasy? What sets our mind and emotions and imagination off into a 10-15 minute reverie? It's the urgency that arises from the issues of the complexity of our being. Can something in us more and more and more as we practice both in an intention, both in a settling

[05:34]

both in a realization come to express just this is enough. Just as it is. Maybe we could say this is the refinement of the ordinary mind. Maybe we could say this is a refinement of the effort of engaging ordinary mind. Each time You notice mind has wandered with some alluring topic. Let it go. Let me exercise this muscle time and time again. Let it go, just this, right now. And just this gives rise to be aware you're aware when you're aware.

[06:47]

Yes? Yeah, I hear what you're saying. So what I added in there in that transition was, when you notice, pause in the noticing. Let what's noticed become just this. Don't go anywhere else. And then in Subhina Zazen, there's a moment of noticing Let that moment be just what it is. Let it register. Let it instruct and let it manifest presence.

[07:52]

Let it instruct what is presence in this moment, what is present in this moment. And then from that contact come back to body, breath, willingness to experience. Yes. In the functionality of it, there's transition. And the natural complement or the natural fruition is be aware you're aware when you're aware. So in that moment of noticing, I've been gone for 10 minutes, or I've been stewing on a painful issue that my mind... is conditioned to move towards. Be aware you're aware when that mind comes up. And then be aware you're aware adds the request of a certain kind of spacious holding.

[08:58]

It has within it its own element of renunciation. This is what's here. And instead of contracting around it, it's more like giving it space. And as we watch that, we can watch it ripple through our mind state. We can watch it ripple through softening the breath. We can watch it ripple through the body, letting the body release. And I would say it's helpful to let all those dimensions come forth. Otherwise, it can start to seem more like a mind game. This is just a game you go through or an activity you go through in your mind. And then turn the light inward.

[10:09]

In young men's everybody has a light. And Mary Oliver's, this is the world. All this stuff that's going on, this is it. When there's spacious presence, quite naturally, all attributes start to come forth. When the arising is held in spacious presence, it becomes just itself rather than global definition, rather than about somewhere else, some other time.

[11:12]

It becomes what's here now. What's happening now? It invites. What is it to practice with it? That factor usually translated as investigation. This is not, you know, when we turn it into words, it sounds like, oh, this is a cognitive activity. This is the mind starting to gear up. You know, sometimes. But also, you know, when we open to the sound of the creek, there's investigation of sound. And the fruition of that investigation is experiencing sound.

[12:18]

It's not the ideas that we cultivate in relationship to it. And then there's also harmonizing and balancing. You know, we see the arising Oh, this kind of agitated state with this adamant perspective and this trajectory towards, given that adamant perspective, something should happen or stop happening. And it has its way it wants to move. When we bring it back and let it be here, comes into perspective in a different way. We're more inclined to see it as an unfolding of the self, an unfolding of the nature of the way mind works, the nature of what is.

[13:34]

and and we're more inclined to appreciate the Dharma both in what it what it manifests and also how to practice with it and then so from that glorious point And as something in us starts to settle, there's a growing capacity for honesty. There's a growing capacity to not need to adorn the moment with what we like and what we don't.

[14:41]

like there's a growing capacity for it to not need to bring it in to the psychodynamic play of our being. Here are my agendas. How does this fit into my agendas? How can I reenact the agendas that are active in me? As we start to settle that starts to soften up. As I'm sure you've noticed, sometimes you've got both going. There's part of you going, it just is what it is, and then another part of you is going, wait a minute, how dare she say that to me. Or whatever it is, however it is. And we start to see, and here's how things get worse.

[15:44]

We start to see those agendas, they aren't the key to a happy life. No matter how much you hate somebody, it doesn't turn them into the person you want them to be. No matter how much you desire something, it doesn't bring it forth into the moment in a fulfilling and satisfying way. And these issues that are arising for us, they are today's version of deeper issues. And part of those issues or the interplay of our own psychology, but part of those issues are the nature of life. We live in impermanence.

[16:49]

We'd much rather we could establish a reassuring safety, security, predictability. But guess what? Everything's impermanent. There is nothing whatsoever that you can establish as enduringly predictable, secure, and safe. And this starts to become evident in this more settled, radically honest perspective. But in the alchemy of settledness, rather than stimulating a frantic anxiety, it moves us towards a sobriety and sanity and a compassion.

[18:03]

Well, no wonder I have these afflictive emotions. No wonder I have these desires and inversions. No wonder I have this ambivalence. No wonder I space out in a kind of foggy way. No wonder I get restless. And we see more the intimate workings of the self And we don't take it so personally. And we see others going through their version of the same thing. And how can you not love them? How can you not have compassion for them? How can you listen to a way-sicking mind talk and not be awestruck at the extraordinary nature of our human lives?

[19:20]

And this brings us to what does practice ask of me? How is it asking me to respond that this cocoon of self can crack open and greater being can enter? And how really can I say anything except yes I will? Does this sobriety and deep sanity? Would I rather substitute agitation, confusion, distraction, avoidance? Anyway, so that was the story I told in Chichilla.

[20:30]

Any questions or comments? I wanted to clarify if I'm understanding a point that... Sure, please. It seems to me that one thing you're saying is that whole mind and body presence is not precisely the same as the step where the light is turned inward or the backward step or the non-dual awareness. Thank you. Actually, thank you for asking that question. It helps me... see a piece I missed. When I lay it out like that, it sounds like, you know, the seven steps to heaven, right? One, two, three, four, five, six, seven. But really more, it's a reiterative process. You know, you practice, something becomes evident, you incorporate that into your practice.

[21:44]

Maybe it adjusts your effort. Maybe it's something that was somatic and it adjusts your posture. Maybe it gave you a little more compassion and patience with some of your own mental workings or other people's mental workings. So it goes back and forth. And that we practice, something becomes evident, we incorporate it, we practice, something else becomes evident, so it's more like that. And then, guess what? Sometimes, out of our conditioned nature, we're more engaged and this practice is more potent. And then other times we're more agitated for whatever reason.

[22:46]

You know? And part of the wonderful and mysterious attribute of doing a practice period is things come up in you and it's like, wow, today I'm just in such a funk. You know? It's like this has taken hold And I can't drop it. It's running me. I'm not running it. And then that afternoon when it warms up or the next morning after you've got some sleep or when the person who you've been agitated by does something remarkably kind or whatever, something comes along and reverses it. So it's not like we're steadily moving in a certain direction of greater opening.

[23:58]

Sometimes we open great and then we close right down because it scared the heck out of us. Sometimes we open great and guess what? Some of the stuff we haven't been looking at says, oh, really? You're ready to listen now? Well, listen to this. And this brings us right back to nonsense, ordinary mind. Okay? If that's today's menu, that's today's menu. Who's to say what's forward and what's backward? Yes. If you're noticing numbing out, notice numbing out.

[25:18]

Learn about numbing out. Let numbing out be your teacher. Numbing out is a strategy for disconnecting to the experience of the moment. All the talks? Well, this answer is a little complicated, so excuse me for that. Depend upon the state of consciousness,

[26:22]

the modality of the response and the temporal relationship varies. What Dogen is saying, when there is open presence, the activity, the awareness and the engagement of it happen simultaneously. Now, in other states of mind, like say... You have an intense interaction with the work leader. The work leader says, you know, you didn't clean that bathroom very well. And in that moment, you know, your self-esteem is completely challenged. Your sincerity as a Zen student is completely challenged. And stutter out.

[27:29]

Something. Really? And then you go and have a cup of tea and then you start to think, when she said that, I should have said whatever. And then you drink your tea and you settle down a little bit and you think, you know, We all have different perspectives and views and this is just part of the tapestry of today, part of the landscape of today. Just something to practice with. So the response there could be, you know, over quite a period of time where it reveals the Dharma, where how can I practice with this?

[28:35]

Do you know what I'm getting at? Not yet? Well, tell me. Well, let me finish the point. So, certain state of mind, it can be simultaneous. Another state of being, it... this the arising of what is it to practice with this can take a while this unfolding the nature of self unfolding the nature of practice and yes I will can take time and that's just how it appears this that's what we manifest as conditioned beings but please Continue your thought. There's an interesting word in Japanese.

[30:25]

Joriki. Joriki means the energy of involvement that comes into being when there's full engagement. but it's important to remember and instructive to remember full engagement comes forth in relationship to dropping the self it's not I have to summon all of this the energy of being comes forth. It's more akin to Dogen's phrase, leaping clear. So in a way what I'm saying is sometimes it's leaping clear and simultaneous and sometimes it's a more complex process.

[31:41]

And our path is, whatever it is, be present for it, notice it, acknowledge it, experience it, practice with it. Whatever it is, it's a khan that asks, what is it to practice with this? the expanse of our way. Ordinary mind in its exquisite capacity for immediacy and in its tawdry capacity for stewing over this and that. Maybe it's humbling when we watch ourselves stew over something like a dog gnawing on a bone, you know, and then we drop it and then we gnaw on it some more and then we... But it's still an offering of the dormo.

[32:58]

Nope. Okay. In the mountains, a wise man never meets another. There's only the activity in the mountains. So are our karmic strategies for living part of the activity of the mountains? Yes, they are, but how they're being related to can vary. You know how I was saying, it's a unique, intimate expression of the self, but don't take it personally. To put it in maybe a more clumsy way, don't add to it all the agendas of your psychological life.

[34:10]

Does this person like me? Am I a good person? Am I going to be happy in the future? Am I going to be able to get over the pains and sufferings of my past? It's like, can it just be closer to just this? And if all the others arise, well then all the others have arisen and they're part of just this and practice with them. But Dugan's pointing more towards as he usually does. the singularity of immediacy. She said, and which includes beginningless greed, hate, and delusion. Often. but it can be to degrees. The thoroughgoing, dropping off is qualitatively different from you're in the middle of your stuff, your stuff and what it's imputing

[35:39]

is defining reality in a strong, reified way. And you're meeting that. That's different from the more subtle workings of consciousness, of conditioned existence, are still there creating a definition of existence. That make sense? Over here, there's just ultimately or absolutely, there's always some except beyond the fourth jhana. There's always some imputation of the self in creating reality. This can be very subtle or this can be gross. I'm totally locked in to my way of seeing the world. My agendas are engaged.

[36:40]

And all this is real. This is the reality. Over here, this is the flickering of momentary existence. Yeah. Unless you want to get really picky and then you say, just a little bit extra. You know, I'm still creating space and time. Sure. I was just reading some talks by a teacher .. And he says something about, it seems like a lot of the teachers .. But he just has this admonition. He says, just watch the mind. Just watch the mind. And came up with Sass's question.

[37:43]

watching the mind. But I was wondering how that relates to what you were teaching, but she had so much emphasis on the body, and the one phrase that they, for one day or another, said, this is the body's form. The mind's not so much really focused on the body. So I was just wondering what the relationship is, and if there is a part of watching the mind, great question well let's start with with the basic truth mind and body are not separate so let's not get too hung up on addressing them as separate systems. Because they're not.

[38:45]

They're intertwined. So we have to allow for when we say one, we're including the other. So there are a variety of meditation techniques in to just touch on that subject briefly. If you attend here, at the experience in the nostrils, this tends to stimulate awareness of the mental functioning. If you attend here, this tends to draw the awareness dying into a different kind of sensate experience.

[39:49]

Like this term I mentioned, Joriki, when you look at how it's talked about in Zen, Suzuki Roshi, this is a story I heard, was coaching someone on how to hit the makugyo. And the person, and they gave us instruction, and the person said, oh, hit it faster. And he said, no, no, no. He said, engage, engage, and experience the energy of it, and quite naturally, it will become more energized and that will produce a different beat from the one you're hitting.

[40:53]

Very physical. Very sensate. The body is the medium for engagement and the body is the medium of expression involvement in what is. And I have to say, you know, part of where this becomes persuasive to me is when I look at the Satipatthana Sutta and I see, oh, mindfulness of the body. Mindfulness of Vedana. Vedana is kind of visceral response. which is the foundation for the emotions. The visceral response comes forth and literally initiates the formulation of the concepts which stimulate the emotion, the psychological relevance.

[41:59]

So the heritage of Zen has that emphasis. And the heritage of attention to the nostrils tends to create a different acuity in how consciousness is being experienced. The mindfulness here seems to be more prevalent in Thailand in the last 50 or 100 years some of the leading teachers in Burma emphasized more the rise and fall of the abdomen and that's also emphasized in Thailand but it's to my experience to a lesser degree so there does seem to be a different emphasis

[43:08]

And also remember that when we're talking about consciousness and we use the word mind, usually we're thinking more of manas or a different notion of mind. So it's good to remember mind and body intertwined too. And also realizing that techniques are engagement and conditioned existence, you know, and they will generate their own emphasis. And I would add to that that the nature of technique is to go beyond technique. So if it has its own emphasis, then it draws you draws consciousness into a place where it opens up from that inclination into broader consciousness.

[44:15]

Yes, I will. Say that being it. You lost me there. How would that happen? Mm-hmm. Well, when he didn't have the baby,

[45:52]

His practice was, yes, I will practice what's in front of me. When he did have the baby, he said, yes, I will. I'll practice with the baby. And, you know, he kept a diary. This was a real event. And he kept a diary. And he wrote in his diary, you know, because every day when he would go, you know, out begging for food, he had the baby because he had to take care of it. And people would give him all sorts of grief. And he was writing in his diary, you know, he's like, this is really hard. It's hard to be out there, you know, requesting alms and have people come up to me and say, you lecturers, you hypocrite. And just, okay. That's how it was. And he just said, yes, I will.

[46:52]

And then the girl confessed, you know, that he wasn't the father, that that was just a moment of panic and it seemed like a way to not reveal who the real father was. And then everybody thought, this guy is a saint. I mean, did you see that? What he did and for how long and how much we reviled him and he didn't become aggressive or self-righteous or a thing. And he's just like, okay. So I went from the greatest evil to the greatest sainthood, and so be it. Karmic conditioning. Either way, yes, I will. Of course things come along, and Tassajara doesn't be the only place to practice. Practice anywhere in any state. Even if someone...

[47:56]

says you're the parent of an infant, okay? There you are. So in some ways I would say that story is this incredible model of, yes, I will, wherever, however it appears. And to me it also points to nonsense, ordinary mind. It's quite usual for us to think the arising of Zazen should be corralled into this range of experience. But the arising of Zazen is the arising of Zazen. It's the fruition of our karmic life and that's already happened. how it's met, how it's related to, to what reveals the Dharma.

[49:01]

Does that help? Yeah, and I think it's a lot, like, well, it's a lot to see, like, a Dharma talking to people, but it's like, like, what they're doing, [...] like, what they're doing. Who knows? You know? I mean, we can speculate all we want about different scenarios that could have happened at that time. Different ways we could suggest he could have responded.

[50:01]

There's so much we don't know. We don't know... Did he see the girl's panic and desperation? And think, okay. You know? Gets her off the hook. You know? Or what? You know? So that, too. You know, we... not fooling ourselves that we know the whole story. We usually don't. We see what we see in any situation and we have our response and we act from our response and even more so with someone else's situation who can say about someone else, oh, I should definitely have done this instead of that.

[51:08]

I think that's helpful to keep in our minds too. My analysis reveals the self. That's me. If I say this is a fabulous door, fabulous is mine. That's my contribution to the experience.

[52:09]

It's not revealing the Dharma of fabulous doors. No, it's about the self. If there's awareness, I can become aware of what my mind considers fabulous. I can become aware of how mind works, perception, adjectives. And then maybe in response to fabulous, there's some feeling, some attraction. whatever you know and seeing that process go on reveals the drama oh look at this conditioned mind coming forth oh look at this the the the workings of my prejudice

[53:22]

I like the fact these doors are double-paint. Gives them more insulating quality. I just do. Isn't that still the self that chooses what you notice? Isn't that a wonderful question? You know. Jiji Uza Mai. gone off? No? Still working? That's a great notion, isn't it? The self employing the self. when the inclinations of the self are being re-stimulated reinforced and increased the imputed reality the way the self imputes its inclinations its prejudices

[54:57]

increases as though it's just when the experience comes forth and eliminates the workings of the self those imputations are being lessened as i start to notice the arising of wonderful door with an approximate cause an apparent cause of double-paned windows and it's made of wood and the grain is exposed I like that and I like that natural wood look so But this very interesting feature of our human existence, as you notice it, acknowledge it, and it's held in spacious presence, we tend not to be so convinced.

[56:17]

Oh, that's the reality. And we tend to not be so attached. That's how it comes into being, with the prejudices of me. Okay? Yes? Mm-hmm. It's not that there's no practice in realization, it's just that they can't be defiled.

[57:27]

What is it? It's not more or less dependent upon how we practice with it. There is practice in realization. When you practice with your being, when your mind consciousness is more attentive, more settled, more open, there's consequence. And when it's otherwise, when it's more agitated and closed and distracted, there's consequence. But what is, is, either way. It's not diminished. or expanded through human agency. Let me try.

[58:51]

If you look in Thomas Cleary's first volume, first of all, he wrote it in three volumes, and in his notes at the end of the first volume, he talked about teaching methods. And he was saying these, I can't remember exactly his source, but different method of response. Maybe one method of response is you're completely right. Every single thing you say is right. Another method of response is that's completely not it. And they're both relative statements.

[59:56]

They're both the teacher trying to find a way to have the student open up. So they're relative. I mean, your response is completely your response. You're completely right. Your response is just your response. It's not anything absolute about it. You're completely wrong. And then it's just in the art of interaction. There is. There's a very funny one where this student comes to a teacher and he says to the teacher, Essentially, he says to me, you know, you're the teacher of 500 monks, and what you've been saying is not that good.

[60:58]

And the teacher goes, yeah, I know what you mean. He said, why don't you go, you know, like, I'm busted. Why don't you go and ask this other guy? And so the student goes off to the other guy and says, yeah, that guy just doesn't have very good answers. He's like, he doesn't really know that much about practice or anything. And that other teacher says, yeah, you're completely right. It's like, go ahead, stew in your own juices. Just hold on. with all that arrogance and adamance to your opinions, and let's see what happens. Let's be affirming, you know? And then, Bodhidharma and the Emperor.

[62:09]

I've heard two stories about the Emperor. One interestingly different. Andy Ferguson in his book says, Well, the emperor, to become the emperor, did a lot of terrible things, maybe even including murder. And then he was trying to, you know, repent and building all these temples and all that. And then the other story is the emperor was quite a serious practitioner. And that interpretation, you know, what is the highest meaning of the holy truth? The emperor asked a more sophisticated question, which was, what is the first principle of practice? And in a way, that's what we're discussing. What is it to practice? What's the first principle of it? And Bodhidharma just offered him negation.

[63:13]

Nothing holy. There's no formulation, just empty. No? Well, who can say that? Don't know. I'm giving you nothing. A bit in the strangeness of Zen, that's sort of like a compliment. No? No? Just... Okay. My thoughts on it are this.

[64:22]

When he was training with Ru Jing, it was kind of the culmination of about... It seems like he started practicing when he was about 14, and then he was an avid student. I read somewhere that he had the equivalent of a PhD in Buddhism by the time he was about 19. This was in the Tendai school. immersed himself in the rigors of Rinzai. And then he went to China, and then he experienced every teacher. And then he ended up with this teacher whose teaching method was unrelenting commitment to Zazen. And in the middle of the intensity of that, and the concentration of that, he had this deep release. And this for him was a pivotal moment.

[65:29]

That deep release revealed something. And then that became a touchstone for how he engaged, considered, and had insight into the various aspects of practice. As he engaged as a teacher, he added to that, and the capacity for this is available in every moment of engagement. So everything is there to be engaged completely. And then in his own methodology, as he elaborated on all sorts of mundane things, on how they can be engaged wholeheartedly, The dropping off of body and mind was engagement. Somewhat in contrast to this consequence of unrelenting, intense meditation.

[66:40]

a separate entity within, as I said, no one is experiencing space or time. See, that's what I do. When I was with some friends at Christmas, they talked about their own son who had autism, and how sometimes the children can't find their body in space at the proprioception, so they don't know where they are. When there's deep sadness and concentration, it adds Joriki. It adds this intensity, this energy to the experience. And I would say throughout the day, we're dropping off body and mind. not with that intensity that made it so vividly evident.

[68:18]

That's my notion about it. And then we look at nonsense saying ordinary mind. Or we look at Dogen saying throughout your day, throughout your activities, this is available. So within the workings of being autistic, yeah. I mean, there's a lady who wrote, somebody knows her name, what's her name of the person? Temple Brandon, you know, and who Unfortunately for the rest of this is not only autistic but can describe the world of being autistic and Part of it is beginner's mind. You know when you're autistic you can't walk into the dining room and Take a scan pick up half a dozen points of reference and then go dining room you have to pause and

[69:36]

and have a beginner's mind. Take in all sorts of information, all sorts of contact, and then you can draw a conclusion. So that whole process, that facility which is within usual mind, isn't there, according to her description. And I've read other articles saying similarly. So in a way we could say, but what a wonderful example in beginner's mind. We walk in and we say dining room, but maybe we don't notice the tables are in a slightly different place. Maybe we don't notice whether the floor has been swept or not. Maybe we don't notice all sorts of details. We quickly moved to habituated identity because In a way, habit of perception and all sorts of habits are trying to establish an efficiency of being.

[70:44]

Efficiency. Because it's more efficient in a way to be able to come in here, scan, get six data points, and say, dynamo. It's more efficient to scan a person. and think, oh, shifso, and then got it. But maybe I don't notice how the shifso is standing or feeling today that would be more evident to me if I paid more attention. So I think... you know, as in some countries, you know, when someone has what we call mental illness, like, say, schizophrenia, in other countries, there's a more nuanced relationship to it. It's more like they have a capacity for an altered state, and there are some things that are revealed in that that are not revealed to us.

[71:54]

And, you know, in other ways, There's difficulties in functioning in a usual way, but it isn't pathologized to the same simple way. What was that last piece? What I'm saying is, I think we all do that every day. Maybe in a less potent and vivid way, and then we quickly move back into, you know?

[72:58]

And the setup we're in is that the structure we're agreed to be part of is continually inviting and requesting that kind of engagement. And I think we're all in the throes of experiencing. We can go through an intense period of formal practice. and we're in a certain state of being and then you go back to your room and you find yourself resuming a more habituated state of being. Just watch yourself on your personal day when you become more the person you are. Watch how sometimes you rush eagerly back to the person you are.

[74:02]

I got to get back to the usual me. There's things I have to worry about. And if I stay here too long, I'll forget them. And then what will happen? But I think our formal practice... And then, can we learn something within those particular constructs of formal practice? Can we learn something universal? Oh. This doesn't only happen when you're in China studying with Wu Jing. This happens when you're back in Japan, wondering, what the heck do I do now? Let me just say briefly what I thought I was going to talk about today. What is the first principle?

[75:16]

And then when we get it, how do we engage it? And the Satipatthana lays it out like this. hindrances when you get the notion be present you know and you sit down in zazen continuous presence with what is the willingness to be that yes I will beyond will now beyond I yes willingness And what happens? Well, guess what? You notice all the stuff that comes up. We can call them hindrances. That's the formulation of early Buddhism. Attraction, aversion, confused ambivalence.

[76:23]

Do I want it or do I not want it? I'm not sure. Arisiness, spaciness, dissociation, numbness, that cluster. Agitated, anxious, trying too hard, restless. So those... That's the classic formulation. And I would say all my entangled conditioned being, I now fully avow. And as we practice, it becomes evident to us.

[77:25]

And as I was saying earlier, Can we move into a spacious honesty? Okay, this is what I'm working with. I have a prejudice about wooden doors that have double-paned windows. That's where I'm at in my life. And if you wanted me to justify it, I could. And then as we see that, it invites us. What's the experience that invites those affirmations? We start to see the working of consciousness.

[78:27]

There's a certain perception, there's a certain visceral response, there's a certain arising formulation of thought, the aggregates, the formulation of being, momentary In a way, we're moving into deconstruction. Solid notions of self, the workings of self, and then the whole way to sense perception. This is I consciousness. This is ear consciousness. This is physicality of being. This is taste. There's another level of deconstruction.

[79:33]

You could say there's another loosening up of the self. There's another loosening up of the reified notion of reality, the reified notion of the self, maybe even the reified notion of space and time. You know, our life here bends time. Sometimes it stretches it. You know? Like, did that just happen yesterday? It seemed like it happened a week ago. You know? So, as we contact the sense perceptions, in Zazen, my shoulder aches, my right shoulder, or just in behind the shoulder blade.

[80:37]

It's awful. Then you attend to the sense perception. My shoulder blade is forgotten. It becomes sense perception. It becomes part of the sensorium of being. And you discover that the concept of my shoulder blade was holding something together. So there's a further opening. And then... The Dharma, the Four Noble Truths, the nature of what causes contraction and suffering, the nature of what causes expansion and liberation, starts to become more evident, more appealing than the constructs of self.

[81:51]

And then the path. And in our formulation, we avow. I now fully avow. We remind ourselves, we ask of ourselves this deep sobriety and sanity called taking refuge. It arises out of our truthfulness. We take refuge and something shifts. Something shifts from how am I going to get what I want to what is it to be in this existence, shared existence in a way that's wholesome.

[82:55]

The three pure precepts. And then the particularities of that, just the same way the Eightfold Path is the particularities of awakening. And then in that formulation, the particularities are the prohibitory precepts. I just put that out there as two variations of this, how Engaging the principle is like an initiation. And then you listen to the way seeking mind talks. And, you know, they're all different. They all have utterly unique particulars to them.

[84:02]

And they all come to this point, you know. Okay, now, be it. And so that's the formulation of the Satyagatana. And the reason I wanted to put that out there, because, you know, then Dogen came about 1200, that was how many years before that? 1700 before. But I think the formulations of the dharma are additive. I would say that his teaching is complementary to that, not in contrast to it. So it helps us to know something of the heritage as we address his teaching. Then we can sort of see, oh, well, this would be a new way to say that.

[85:05]

Or we can see, oh, and then this is another kind of emphasis. Hopefully it gives us a basis in which to appreciate his way of looking at things. And then... I would recommend, as I usually do, an Aleo's book on Satipatthana. Lovely book. From the Path of Realization. If you want to look more into that. It's always been notable to me that in the early text, in particular the Satipatthana, all this is quite... It just gives you snippets and then you take those and you work them through your own being.

[86:14]

It's like you plant the seed in your own practice being. It grows into the Dharma tree. That's where the teachings unfold. They're not in what's formulated on the page. They're what arises out of the being of practice. Okay, thank you. Thank you for listening to this podcast offered by the San Francisco Zen Center. Our Dharma talks are offered free of charge, and this is made possible by the donations we receive. Your financial support helps us to continue to offer the Dharma. For more information, visit SSCC.org and click giving.

[87:01]

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